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00:01You know, Tool Time's not just about home improvement,
00:03it's also about male improvement.
00:05So continuing our male improvement series,
00:07Al and I today are gonna talk about men and their shoes.
00:09That's right.
00:10We'll be delving into shoe repair and shoe shining.
00:13Not to mention shoe trees.
00:19And shoe horns.
00:24Anyway, here's a pair of wingticks over here
00:26that have certainly seen better days.
00:28Now, when you have a shoe this damaged,
00:31you wanna take it down to the original leather
00:33using rubbing alcohol.
00:34Right.
00:35Then for the rough spots, use a little leather dye,
00:37polish her up, you got a shoe as good as new.
00:39And remember, when you're using shoe polish,
00:40use a little bit of water.
00:41Make that shine really spectacular.
00:43That's right.
00:44Then you wanna buff it with a cloth diaper.
00:47Make sure you remove the baby first, though.
00:51This will give your shoe a sheen for sure.
00:54You don't shay.
00:58All right, now, Tim.
01:01What were to happen if we have a brand new pair of shoes
01:04and the leather is hard and uncomfortable?
01:07Ooh.
01:08That could be a big problem if you had feet like Al's mom.
01:10Well, for shoes like this, my mother always used
01:22Binford's leather softener.
01:25That turns your new hard shoes into the old soft shoe.
01:31clothes.
01:32Close?
01:33Oh!
01:34Thanks, but...
01:49Oh, thanks, but enough of that foolishness.
02:01Let's get on with the next part of the shoe repair.
02:03Tim, do you call that a soft shoe?
02:05It's a joke, Al.
02:06Anyway...
02:07Klaus?
02:08Are you done?
02:10Are you done?
04:08Well, 15 is what you got on your math test.
04:12Give it a rest, guys, okay?
04:14Now, this is the Tim Taylor authorized puck chucker.
04:20Move out of the way, please.
04:21Put your mask down.
04:22Remember what I taught you.
04:23This thing shoots at incredible speed.
04:34That thing is incredible.
04:37Good thing he's wearing padding.
04:43I got to get the instruction book out.
04:45Once you get the instructions, we'll see how many pucks this hockey puck chucker can chuck.
04:49If a puck chucker could chuck pucks.
04:52Shouldn't your dad be here?
04:57Well, you know, the colonel, if he says he'll be here at 1,700 hours, he means 1,700 hours sharp.
05:031,700 hours.
05:04What time is that again?
05:065 o'clock.
05:07I've been trying to teach you military time for 15 years.
05:10Now, listen to this.
05:11You subtract 12 if it's a double-digit number greater than 12.
05:15If it's a single-digit number, it's the actual time.
05:17If it's a double-digit number that's less than or equal to 12, then that's also the actual time.
05:22Have you got that?
05:23Yeah.
05:27Wish your mom was coming.
05:28At least she speaks civilian.
05:31Me, too.
05:32She said she needed a break from Dad.
05:34She wants to have one week where she doesn't have to get up before dawn and raise the flag.
05:41Are we here or here?
05:43Right.
05:46Hey, Dad.
05:47Daddy!
05:47Hello, sweetheart.
05:49How's my little girl?
05:52Great.
05:52I'm so happy to see you.
05:58Hey, you still live here?
06:02Colonel, good to see you.
06:03I see the Lincoln's running real well.
06:05Oh, got me up here all the way from Texas.
06:07I tell you, 61 was a vintage year.
06:10You should have bought one the day they came out.
06:13I would have, sir, but I was six.
06:17That's no excuse.
06:19Hey, we're getting tool time on the satellite.
06:22That's what Nana told us.
06:23I don't watch it, but we get it.
06:27Just kidding.
06:29You know I love tool time.
06:31Would you like a drink?
06:32Water.
06:32Straight from the tap.
06:33None of that hippie bottle stuff.
06:36Say, did you get the tickets to the Guns and Knives show?
06:41Guns and Knives?
06:42I thought you wanted to see Guns and Roses.
06:46What?
06:47It's a joke.
06:50Ah, you're a great kid.
06:52Let me put you up in Mark's room.
06:53Okay.
06:55Grandpa!
06:57That's my troops!
06:58Attention!
07:02At ease.
07:02Ah, hair's getting a little long.
07:08Maybe later we'll all go for crew cuts.
07:11You're right.
07:15What'd you say?
07:16Um, nothing, sir.
07:19Grandpa!
07:20What did you bring us?
07:21Hey, hey, come on, Mark.
07:22Where are your manners?
07:23Hey, what's a grandfather for?
07:25I got you guys a special treat.
07:29Shrapnel.
07:33Let's go show Jeremy.
07:36Yeah.
07:36Hey, watch it with that stuff.
07:37It's sharp.
07:38You bet it's sharp.
07:39That shrapnel was removed from my...
07:40Forget where it was removed.
07:42You gave the boy shrapnel?
07:46What'd you give me?
07:49Gave you my daughter.
07:50Yeah, you're right, sir.
07:53But I'm kind of tired of playing with that kid.
08:04You know, Tim, about you all is calling me sir.
08:08Yeah?
08:09I like it.
08:11Now, actually, I do have something for the both of you.
08:14His and her bazookas.
08:16Better.
08:16I wrote a book about my experiences in the military.
08:22I got a copy for each of you.
08:24Hefty.
08:25Dad, you wrote a book.
08:26This is great.
08:27Yes, Schwarzkopf can do it.
08:29Any bum can.
08:32You know, I thought, you know, since you work at the magazine,
08:35you could read it, and if you like it,
08:37you might pass it along to some of your friends in publishing.
08:41Oh, Dad, I'm so excited.
08:43I can't wait to read it.
08:44And I can't wait to have you tell me what you thought of it.
08:47Now, what time's dinner?
08:492,300 hours, sir.
08:54That's 11 p.m.
08:56We ate late.
08:57Are you enjoying it?
09:15A lot of facts.
09:16Yeah, it's so detailed.
09:19Tremendous detail.
09:20And it's not flowery.
09:21No, no flowers here.
09:23Yeah, just page after page of detail.
09:26You can't go wrong with details.
09:30It's boring, isn't it?
09:33It's mind-numbing.
09:34I thought this was going to be more of a story,
09:40but there's nothing in there but tactics and military strategy.
09:44What are we going to tell him?
09:46Tell the truth.
09:47Oh, sure.
09:49You know my dad.
09:50He hears bad news, he hits the roof,
09:53then he sulks,
09:54then he doesn't want to talk about it anymore,
09:55and then the whole thing remains unresolved.
09:57He can take it.
09:58He's a tough guy.
09:58He gives shrapnel's gifts.
10:00No way.
10:03I cannot ever tell him.
10:05Why not?
10:07When I do something you don't like,
10:08you don't hold back on me.
10:14I've held back lots of things from you, Tim.
10:16Back the truth trolley up here a little bit.
10:19What kind of things don't you let me know?
10:21Oh, where shall I start?
10:23With one.
10:27Okay.
10:28You know that green suit you bought?
10:31That wasn't green.
10:32That was more of a pistachio.
10:35You said it was stunning.
10:37What was stunning was that you could walk into a store
10:39and actually walk out with that suit.
10:44All right, we got the machine up and running.
10:45You're going to operate from back here.
10:46Remember what I told you?
10:47All right.
10:47All right, I'll give you the pointers now.
10:50Most important thing about being a goalie...
10:52Is it these things hurt?
10:56Sorry, Dad.
10:59A good goalie is always prepared, all right?
11:08Hey, hey, hey!
11:11I saw where you're aiming that thing.
11:15All right, stand in.
11:16Dad, I can't.
11:17We ran out of pucks.
11:18I need to reload.
11:19All right, reload.
11:21Dad?
11:22When does Grandpa get him up?
11:25Oh, let's see.
11:27He went to bed at 2,300 hours.
11:30He wanted nine hours of sleep.
11:33That's 3,200.
11:36Minus 12.
11:37You add that up.
11:39Uh, 20 o'clock.
11:41Tim, now remember, when Dad comes down and I said, we liked the book, we tell him that
11:51we loved it.
11:52If you want to lie to your dad, that's your business.
11:53I don't want to lie to him.
11:55That's just how we do things in my family.
11:57Would it make you feel better if I told him the truth?
12:03Oh, honey, that is so sweet.
12:06I should be the one to tell him now.
12:08Great.
12:10But since I can't...
12:12Jill, Jill, listen to me.
12:14Look, what if I get the ball rolling and you just jump in when you feel comfortable?
12:19That might work.
12:20Sure will.
12:21I'll tell him how I feel about it, and then you just back me up.
12:24But you have to promise to be tactful.
12:27Have I ever been anything but tactful?
12:31Good morning.
12:32Morning.
12:32Daddy, how did you sleep?
12:34Oh, great.
12:35But I'm starting to grow out of Mark's bed.
12:38Coffee?
12:39I love some.
12:41So, uh, did you read my book?
12:43I'll get the coffee.
12:45Yes.
12:46Yes, we did read the book.
12:47So, uh, what did you think of it, honey?
12:49Uh, would you like eggs or waffles?
12:52Eggs?
12:54There's a lot of good stuff in there.
12:56Oh, yeah, a lot.
13:01It's, uh, a tad bit wordy.
13:05You know, in a good way.
13:09A writer's supposed to use words.
13:11What do you want, pictures?
13:14Could have helped a little.
13:15What was so odd, you have a book and there's no people in it.
13:22This is a book about policy and objectives and how to win a war.
13:25You don't want to clutter that up with a lot of people.
13:33Good point.
13:35Writing a book about war, you don't want to talk about people.
13:37What are you trying to tell me, Tim?
13:40That you had mixed feelings about my book?
13:43I wouldn't say that.
13:47You wouldn't know good literature if it bit you in the butt.
13:53Well, honey, I think I've gotten that ball rolling about as far as it's going to go.
13:57Why don't you jump in and tell your dad what you thought of the book?
14:04Honey?
14:05Jill?
14:06Loved it.
14:07It's the best book I ever read.
14:21So, can I get you something else?
14:23Would you like a slice of coffee cake?
14:25Here, just use the knife you're stuck in my back.
14:31I can't believe you sold me out.
14:32Tim, you're overreacting.
14:34No, what I know is that I tell the truth and I come out like the bad guy.
14:38How can you be so selfish?
14:43What?
14:44This whole thing is between me and my father and all you care about is how you come off?
14:49What?
14:50Well, I think you could be a little more supportive in a situation like this.
14:54Supportive about what...
14:55Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
14:56I appreciate you defending me, but he's entitled to his opinion.
15:01Even though we both know he's wrong.
15:04Let's face it, Tim.
15:05You have no taste.
15:07Tim has wonderful taste.
15:09Yeah?
15:10Remember that green suit he wore to your sister's wedding?
15:13It wasn't green.
15:16It was avocado, almost melon.
15:17So, uh, when are you going to bring my book to your publisher?
15:25Well, you know, Dad, I think that, um, she's kind of busy right now.
15:29She's out of town, in fact.
15:31Well, who's the number two in command?
15:33We'll speak to him instead.
15:34Oh, Dad, he's not going to want to talk to me.
15:37He doesn't even know I work there.
15:39Well, then, this could be your opportunity to put yourself on the map.
15:42Dad, I couldn't use you to further my career.
15:47Oh, nonsense.
15:50Now, we'll go down there first thing tomorrow morning and show them my book.
15:56I can't do that.
15:57Why not?
16:02Because I wasn't totally honest with you before.
16:10Daddy, this is really hard for me to say, but the book is just really not very good.
16:17And why'd you say you loved it?
16:19Because that's what you wanted to hear.
16:20Don't tell me what I wanted to hear.
16:22I wanted to hear the truth.
16:23Well, I'm telling it to you now.
16:25Fine.
16:26You didn't like the book.
16:28I'm going to get the boys.
16:29We'll be back at 1,300 hours.
16:33What time is that?
16:36It's 1 o'clock.
16:38Why is that so difficult for you to understand?
16:41Every private in the Army gets it by the end of the first day.
16:44Daddy, I'm really sorry that I upset you, but you know...
16:48I'm not upset.
16:49If I were upset, I'd be yelling.
16:55I remember now the salesman said that suit was a loadin' heather.
16:58Oh.
17:24Wilson?
17:24Uh-huh.
17:25oh hi-de-ho neighborette
17:30what are you doing well i'm just trying to read this extremely lengthy tome that your father gave
17:38me why are you doing it out here it's freezing cold well i tried reading inside but i kept falling
17:43asleep uh kim and i tried to talk to him about it today but he just got real upset well there
17:51are those people that don't respond well to criticism yeah and some of them yell you remember
17:56that movie old yeller when it came out we thought it was about daddy well that must have been difficult
18:04to grow up with yeah it was that's why we had this house policy never to upset him i always tried to
18:11follow that rule but today i couldn't so you're feeling that telling him the truth was a mistake
18:17i've always really adored my father you know i don't want to do anything to hurt that relationship
18:25you mean the relationship where you don't tell him the truth
18:29yeah that would be the one
18:32i don't know i mean look what happened when i told him the truth maybe i should have just kept my mouth
18:39shut well george bernard shaw wouldn't have thought so he said we must not stay as we are doing always
18:47what was done last time or we shall stick in the mud well i'm stuck in something deep here wilson but
18:55it ain't mud
18:56so i'm standing there in korea right on the 38th parallel when who tapped me on the shoulder
19:07general douglas macarthur
19:10who your father never told you about general macarthur no but he told me about general motors
19:19well this guy was even bigger so we're standing there and what do you think he hands me
19:27an apple a grenade you know how to throw one of these things son you grip it in your right hand
19:35you pull the pen with your teeth and you let it fly no throwing grenades in the house mark
19:44how'd you know what it was you kidding i grew up with fruit ammunition
19:47honey um would you go upstairs i want to talk to grandpa okay
19:58can i talk to you for a minute dad about what don't say the book
20:02dad i wish you wouldn't take my criticism so personally i said i don't want to talk about the
20:06book well i do
20:07where do you get off criticizing me in the first place what do you know about the military you see
20:17this is why i didn't want to tell you because i knew that you would overreact you always do that's
20:21why nobody can ever tell you anything what are you talking about well we were growing up we weren't
20:25allowed to tell you anything that might upset you oh really then why the hell was i upset so much
20:29dad you didn't know half of what was going on in that house i knew everything oh you did did you
20:38okay did you know that uh when i was in high school and i said that i was going on that all
20:42girl ski weekend that i really went to a peace march in washington with tommy burnett tommy the commie
20:49i don't want to know it you see you want to be kept in the dark well some things are better left
20:55unsaid maybe for you because then you can have the same order at home that you had at the base
20:58but we're not your soldiers dad am right my soldiers were under control then i'd come home
21:03to your mother and you five girls and i never knew what the hell was going on
21:16dad i love you so much and there were a million times that i needed to talk to you
21:25but i felt like i couldn't well i thought it was pretty easy to talk to well you're not well we're
21:36talking now yeah
21:39look honey i'm sorry i chewed your head off about the book i'm sorry i didn't like the book but i'm
21:57glad that i had the guts to tell you the truth
22:09now if you look at it in this light it's more of a lima bean
22:11hey hey what are you doing this thing's too easy for randy so i tweaked it up a little bit
22:26i hate when you say that word tweak it makes my hackles go up
22:29i love when your hackles go up where's your dad uh it's 20 degrees outside and he's out there
22:38futzing with the lincoln and watch how hard this thing hits the net now randy's gonna be a great
22:44goalie watch the top of the corner
22:56it was gel
23:00fine you didn't like the book i'll go pick up the boys we'll be back at 13 hours 1300 hours
23:14so
23:31you
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