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00:00The Lucy Show
00:10Starring Lucille Ball
00:15Co-starring Gail Gordon
00:30Good morning, Mr. Mooney.
00:51Good morning. Do you have the mail?
00:53Well, I certainly have, right here.
00:55I've been waiting for it, you know. You're late, you're late.
00:57Oh, I'm sorry.
00:58Open this one. It looks important.
01:00Yes, sir.
01:00I'd better open that one, too.
01:02Why you can't get here on time, I'll never know.
01:03Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Mooney.
01:05I'm never late. Not me.
01:06Not that late, Mr. Mooney.
01:07I am here right on the spot all the time.
01:11There's... Oh, I wonder...
01:12Wow!
01:15Wow, what?
01:16This letter's from Mr. Cheever.
01:18Oh, Mr. Cheever, huh.
01:20Oh, does he want to know how I'm handling things here while he's back east?
01:23No. No, listen to this.
01:26Dear Mooney, Mr. Jacques Dupre will arrive in Los Angeles on Monday, and I have suggested
01:33that he visit you in your office.
01:35He's coming here. He's coming right here.
01:38His company is scheduled to produce pictures in Hollywood.
01:41I am most hopeful you can land the account yours truly, Mr. Cheever.
01:44What do you think of that?
01:45Well, I'm delighted to have the opportunity to accommodate him.
01:49Are you a fan of his, too?
01:51As long as he is president of this bank, I will be a fan of Mr. Cheever.
01:56I meant, are you a fan of Jacques Dupre?
02:00Who is Jacques Dupre?
02:02Who is Jacques Dupre?
02:04Well, he's one of the most famous movie stars in France.
02:07Well, what... When is this movie star coming?
02:10He arrives on Monday.
02:12That's today.
02:13He might be here any minute.
02:14Oh, yes, any minute.
02:15Well, pick up the letters.
02:17The place looks like a mess.
02:18For heaven's sake, I want to make it work.
02:20All right, hurry up.
02:24Come in.
02:26Bonjour, bonjour, bonjour, bonjour.
02:32It's him. It's him. It's him. It's Jacques Dupre.
02:37Down, Mrs. Carmichael, down.
02:42Monsieur Mounet?
02:43Uh, oui. Je suis très enchante de vous voir.
02:52What did he say?
02:54I think it's French.
02:56Does he speak English?
02:57Well, of course I do.
02:59Oh, of course, or do I?
03:00Oh, me too.
03:03Oh, uh, Mrs. Carmichael, my secretary.
03:07Hello.
03:07Oh, thank you.
03:09I mean, uh, I'm, I'm very happy to meet you.
03:12Oh, the pleasure is all night.
03:14Oh, I have two of them.
03:22Uh, uh, uh, won't you, uh, sit down, Mr. Dupre?
03:25Oh, thank you.
03:26Yeah.
03:27Let go of it.
03:36Oh, uh, Mrs. Carmichael is such a big fan, she gets carried away.
03:40Oh, uh, I'm fluttered.
03:41Yeah.
03:42Uh, Mr. Cheever wrote me a letter and told me, will you go and sit down?
03:46Mr. Cheever told me you might be interested in the services of our bank.
03:54That's right.
03:55Well, wonderful.
03:56I can assure you that all of our facilities are at your command.
04:01Yeah.
04:02Hey.
04:03I'll handle this.
04:07Now, then what can I do for you?
04:09I have a few checks brawl on my bank in France, and I wonder if you would, uh, cash them for me.
04:14Well, I'll take care of the matrimoniality, yes, indeed.
04:17It's a pleasure.
04:18Uh, Mrs. Carmichael.
04:19Yes, sir.
04:21Perhaps, uh, Mr. Dupre might, uh, like to look at a magazine while I'm gone.
04:25Oh.
04:26Oh, I must say it's a great pleasure having you here in my office.
04:30Thank you, Mr. Mooney.
04:34I was talking to him.
04:36Oh.
04:40Mr. Dupre, uh, I, I have a fan magazine here.
04:43And it has a picture of you in it.
04:45Would you give me your autograph, please?
04:47Oh, I'd be delighted to.
04:48Here, here's a pen.
04:50Now, your name is, uh, Mrs. Carmichael?
04:52Oh, would you make it out to Lucy?
04:54Oh, uh, well, uh, let's say, how about if I write, uh, warmest regards to Lucy?
05:01Fine.
05:01Uh, whose, uh, irresistible charm and, uh, intoxicating beauty incites the hearts of men to, to overflow with, with a romantic inclination.
05:15Oh, uh, oh, uh, would you write it in French?
05:25I want to show it to my mother.
05:27Oh, uh, is your mother French?
05:28No, she's old-fashioned Irish.
05:30That's why you better write it.
05:34Oh, uh, you know something?
05:35I saw you three times in Kisses at Dawn.
05:38Oh, uh, did you like the picture?
05:39Oh, yes, yes, I just loved it, but you know something, I was absolutely terrified at the scene where, where, where the lion tamer got sick and you had to take his place.
05:50Oh, yes, that was an exciting scene, huh?
05:52Was it a real lion?
05:53Of course.
05:54Weren't you scared?
05:56Uh, no, no, no, because you see, uh, before the lion was brought into the cage, the director insisted on using tranquilizers.
06:03Tranquilizers? Oh, they doped the lion.
06:06No, me.
06:09Oh, oh, well, I still think they were crazy, putting a big star like you in a, in a cage with a real lion.
06:16Oh, no, you see, because the lion tamer told me what to do.
06:20Well, what'd he say?
06:21Yes, well, you see, I had, um, I had a whip.
06:24Uh-huh.
06:24See?
06:25And I had a chair.
06:26Oh.
06:27You see?
06:27Now, the idea is to confuse the lion.
06:29Oh, really?
06:30Yes.
06:30Now, you do that by yelling.
06:32Oh!
06:34Uh-huh.
06:34And by cracking the whip to distract him.
06:36Oh.
06:36Oh, yes, yes, yes, I've seen him do that.
06:39Now, when the lion raises his paw, raise the chair to block off his vision.
06:44Oh.
06:45You see?
06:45Uh-huh.
06:45Yes.
06:46Now, uh, uh, uh, take your hand and, uh, and, uh, and, uh, and paw at me.
06:50Oh, you mean make like a lion?
06:51Right.
06:52Oh.
06:52Here, go.
06:54Back!
06:54Back!
06:55Back!
06:55Back!
06:56Back!
06:56Back!
06:57Back!
06:57Back!
06:58Back!
06:58Back!
06:59Back!
06:59Back!
07:00Back!
07:01Back!
07:02Back!
07:03Back!
07:04Back!
07:05Back!
07:06Back!
07:07Back!
07:08Back!
07:09Back!
07:10Back!
07:11Back!
07:12Back!
07:13Back!
07:14Back!
07:15Oh, Monsieur Dupré.
07:16Oh, I'm terribly sorry.
07:18Please accept my apologies.
07:20Oh, I knew that one day this teenage senior citizen would flip.
07:26No, no, Monsieur, Monsieur, it's not her fault.
07:29No, no, no, no.
07:30I was just explaining to her how I once played the role of a lion tamer in motion picture.
07:35You see?
07:36Oh.
07:37Oh.
07:38Oh.
07:39Oh.
07:40Here's your money, Mr. Dupré.
07:41Oh, thank you.
07:42Excuse me.
07:43Oh, thank you.
07:44Well, let's get down to business, shall we, Mr. Dupré?
07:50Yes.
07:51Mr. Cheever tells me that your company is going to make a picture here in Hollywood.
07:55That's right.
07:56Well, our bank has had a lot of experience in that field.
07:59I'm sure you'd be more than satisfied with our services.
08:02I'd be quite interested.
08:04Wonderful.
08:05Then all we need from you is a formal letter of agreement and we can close the deal right
08:10now.
08:11Fine, fine.
08:12But I must go back to my hotel right now.
08:14I'm expecting a few calls from Europe.
08:16Oh.
08:17But perhaps you could send a secretary to my hotel and I could dictate the agreement.
08:22Yes, indeed.
08:23Of course I could.
08:24And I have just the girl for you.
08:26Oh, Mr. Mooney, you're a doll.
08:29Not you.
08:31I could go over on my lunch hour.
08:34Now, Mrs. Carmichael, I'm...
08:35But, Mr. Mooney, it's my lunch hour and I'm really a very fine secretary, Mr. Dupré.
08:41Well, I'd be delighted to have Mrs. Carmichael.
08:44Si.
08:45Well, of course, anything you say, Mr. Dupré.
08:48Well, I hope it's not unfair to ask you to come on your lunch hour and work at the hotel
08:53with me.
08:54It is my pleasure.
08:55Oh, you are so nice.
08:56Oh, thank you.
08:57You are so generous.
08:58I don't know what to say.
09:00I just hope you won't be saying, Yankee, go ho.
09:03Mr. Dupré, what hotel are you staying at?
09:05The Plaza Royal.
09:06The Plaza Royal.
09:07I'll be there at 12.30.
09:08Good.
09:09And while we are working, I will order some lunch.
09:11Oh, some lunch with you?
09:12Oh, how wonderful.
09:13Okay.
09:14Thank you so much.
09:15Oh, my pleasure, sir.
09:16I assure you.
09:19Oh, my pleasure, sir.
09:20I assure you.
09:22Oh, River Darcy.
09:23I assure you.
09:25Oh, River Darcy.
09:26I assure you.
09:27Oh, Mr. Mooney, hasn't this been a morning?
09:40Yes, and before it's completely shot, let's get to answering the mail, shall we?
09:44Well, can't we do it this afternoon?
09:45I have to get over to the hotel.
09:46You're not due there until 12.30.
09:47Well, I have to go home first.
09:48Why?
09:49Well, I don't want him to see me like this.
09:51To your death.
09:52Mr. Mooney, I want to go home.
09:53The floor changed my mind.
09:54That's right.
09:55Uh, Mr. Mooney, I want to go home and have changed my mind.
10:05That's right.
10:07We've been in production in about ten days.
10:14Fine.
10:15Bye.
10:16Bye.
10:25I'm sorry I'm a little late.
10:33Oh, it's all right.
10:33It's all right.
10:35Oh.
10:38You look lovely.
10:39Oh, and thank you.
10:41I like to be comfortable when I work,
10:43so I just ran home and tossed down this little old thing.
10:48Very chic.
10:50Please, come in.
10:50Sit down.
10:51Oh.
10:55I will order some ranch.
11:00Oh, are you sure you wouldn't rather get some work done first?
11:04No, I have a better idea.
11:06First, we're going to have some champagne.
11:09Champagne?
11:10Well.
11:11Chateau Bergerac.
11:13Oh.
11:151959.
11:1759.
11:18Oh, that was a very good year.
11:20Uh, well, what about our work?
11:26Oh, it will still be here.
11:28That's one thing about work.
11:29It never runs away.
11:30Touche.
11:31You speak French.
11:34Well, I do, don't I?
11:36Here.
11:37Oh, thank you.
11:39My, my.
11:40I work for a lot of people,
11:41but I've never had a job that should drink champagne on.
11:44Well, the secretary, as charming as you, invites hospitality.
11:49Oh, thank you.
11:56Good?
11:57Oh, it's delicious.
11:59Oh.
12:02Gee, when I saw you in the movies,
12:03I never dreamed that I'd be sitting here with you,
12:06drinking champagne and talking French.
12:12Pardon?
12:12Oh, um, hinky-dinky-parley-voo.
12:33I was thirsty.
12:36That sure beats a coffee break.
12:39Well, I am glad that you are enjoying yourself.
12:45Here.
12:46Mercy.
12:51You mean to say merci?
12:53No, I meant mercy.
12:55I know what this stuff can do to you.
13:00Touche.
13:01Oh, thank you.
13:02That's the first time anyone ever touche-ed me.
13:05Do you know that you have a delightful sense of humor?
13:11Yes, I know.
13:14Uh, a votre santé.
13:16Hmm?
13:17A votre santé.
13:19Uh, mademoiselle from Armatier.
13:22Good.
13:39That's very good.
13:41Oh, uh, monsieur Dupre,
13:51I don't think I'd better have any more champagne.
13:52We do have work to do.
13:55Oh.
13:56Would you rather I dictate Mr. Munez's letter
13:58before we have lunch?
14:00Yes.
14:01Yes, I think so.
14:02I believe I've wasted enough of your time.
14:05A fascinating woman is never a waste of time.
14:11Me?
14:12Fascinating?
14:13Oh, jeez.
14:14No, really, really.
14:14I find you very, very attractive.
14:17On the little bit you've had to drink?
14:22Lucy.
14:23What?
14:24You know something?
14:26What?
14:27You are such a delightful little pixie.
14:29Oh.
14:31You know, you know what I like about you?
14:34What?
14:34You sure know how to treat help.
14:42Oh, and I do dig these crazy fringe benefits.
14:49But we, we, uh, we better get started, uh, with our work.
14:54Oh, all right.
14:55Whatever you're going to do.
15:01I, uh, I'm ready.
15:03Uh, let's see, we'll start, uh...
15:06Oh.
15:10I beg your pardon.
15:12Uh, let's see.
15:13Oh, oh, my, I have really got...
15:17I got them.
15:19I've got the hiccups.
15:20Oh, I'm terribly embarrassed.
15:22Oh, but I, I know how to get rid of them.
15:25Uh, let's see now.
15:25They said take 10, 15 swallows of, uh, of something and hold your nose.
15:30Yeah, that was it.
15:31Oh, my God.
15:33Oh, my God.
15:39Oh, my God.
15:45There. That ought to do it. Where are you?
16:07Here, here, here, here, here.
16:12You feel better?
16:15I feel fine.
16:17Good. All right. Let's get on with the dictation, huh?
16:21All righty.
16:28All right. Address the letter to your boss.
16:36Dear sir,
16:40The following... No. The following is a letter of agreement between the...
16:44Monsieur Dupre?
16:46Yes?
16:47Did you say, address this letter to my boss?
16:50Yes.
16:51What's his name?
16:58Mr. Mooney.
17:00That's right. That's right.
17:05The following...
17:06How can you remember that with all I've had to drink?
17:12All right. The following is a letter of agreement between the Dupre production company and...
17:18I don't know what's the matter. I can't believe this.
17:21Well, what is it?
17:24This has never happened before.
17:28My ballpoint pen has never failed me before.
17:33You've got it upside down.
17:34You've got it upside down.
17:39So I have.
17:53Are you ready?
17:54For what?
18:10I think you better have some black coffee.
18:13Black coffee?
18:14It will make you feel better.
18:16I am perfectly all right.
18:19I assure you I'm doing my job.
18:22I am a very commentary secretant.
18:28Yeah, of course, of course you are.
18:29But if you are going to try to take dictation,
18:33I think better you should have some black coffee.
18:35I don't need any black coffee.
18:38I'll be all right if you'll just hold the room still.
18:46Darling!
18:48Je zubu me beaucoup.
18:51Je me saipa what to do.
19:01You know what?
19:02I've never been on such a big boat before.
19:07Boats?
19:08Yeah, what time do you sail?
19:11Same!
19:12Well, the last time I saw somebody off, I wound up Catalina.
19:16I better get off here before they pull up the gangplank.
19:23Oh, my God!
19:25What about the letter?
19:27The letter?
19:33Yes, the letter, the letter.
19:36Don't forget to write!
19:38Darling!
19:40Je zubu zem beaucoup.
19:43Je me saipa scubidu.
20:00Hello, Mooney.
20:01Mr. Cheever, sir.
20:02I didn't expect you back so soon.
20:04Well, that's the jet age for you.
20:06Now, tell me, did you get my letter regarding Monsieur Dupre?
20:09Oh, yes, yes, I did.
20:10And he was in my office this morning.
20:12Well, I hope you made a good impression upon him.
20:14This could be the biggest deal of the year.
20:16Oh, yes, I think I did, sir.
20:18As a matter of fact, my secretary is over at his hotel right now getting a letter of agreement.
20:22And when she gets back with that letter, the deal is in the bag.
20:25Oh, that's fine.
20:27Good boy!
20:28I knew I could count on you.
20:30Oh, thank you, sir.
20:31How about the cigar?
20:32I'm Mr. Dupre Dupre Dupre Dupre Dupre Dupre Dupre Dupre Dupre Dupre.
20:40Mrs. Carmichael.
20:42Oh, hi, Mr. Mooney.
20:44Mr. Cheever.
20:46Hi, Bank.
20:48Hi, World.
20:50I think she's high.
20:54Mrs. Carmichael.
20:55Yes?
20:56I trust you kept your appointment with Mr. Dupre Dupre?
20:59I sure did.
21:00Sure did.
21:04Mrs. Carmichael, you have been drinking.
21:08No.
21:11Only a little champagne.
21:13It was 1959.
21:15And it was a very good year.
21:20Mooney, as she has caused any embarrassment with Monsieur Dupre, I am going to hold you responsible.
21:27Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
21:29Monsieur Dupre said that I was very charming company.
21:33Well, never mind that.
21:34Just give me the letter.
21:39Give me the letter.
21:41What letter?
21:43What letter?
21:45I asked you better.
21:48I sent you to get a letter of agreement.
21:52Oh, that letter.
21:55I didn't get it.
21:57A fine way to lose an important client.
22:01Mooney, we'll discuss this in my office at once.
22:05I'll be waiting for you.
22:09Now you see what you've done?
22:11Well, you didn't give me a chance to explain.
22:13The only thing I will give you is a little pink slip to go with your little pink eyes.
22:19What do you mean by that?
22:20You are fired!
22:21Oh, Mr. Mooney!
22:23Now you start cleaning out your desk.
22:24And by the time I get back, you had better be gone!
22:28And by the time I get back, you had better be gone!
22:37I'll be gone, all right!
22:41I should have gotten out of here a long time ago.
22:45You'll have to ask me twice.
22:46I can get along without you, you know!
22:50I'll collect my unemployment insurance!
22:55It'll be the first time I got a raise in two years!
22:57Oh, Mr. Dupre!
23:07I was worried about you after you jumped ship.
23:12Oh!
23:13Yes, we have a little unfinished business, haven't we?
23:18Oh!
23:19Yes!
23:22Here's the letter!
23:24Oh, that letter!
23:27Great thing I've ever come across in my life!
23:30Thank you, slaving my fingers to the phone!
23:35And, and, and, do not expect a letter of reference!
23:38Just pack up and go!
23:43Oh, Mr. Dupre!
23:45Oh, Mr. Dupre!
23:47I dropped in to give Mrs. Carmichael the letter of agreement.
23:51Oh, the letter!
23:53Yeah!
23:54We got it, yeah!
23:57Well, uh, Mr. Dupre, I am delighted.
24:00Now, sir, how would you like to have lunch with Mr. Mooney and me?
24:04Well, I'm sorry, gentlemen, but I already have an engagement lunch with Mrs. Carmichael.
24:11Mrs. Carmichael?
24:14Oh!
24:15But remember, no more champagne!
24:18Oh, of course not!
24:19You've had too much already!
24:23Oh, uh, Mr. Mooney, Mr. Mooney, while I'm gone, would you tidy up my desk?
24:31You heard her tidy up her desk!
24:35Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
24:35Darling, just a few zenboku!
24:39Guam, no save, but I'll be doing it!
24:41Oh, oh, oh!
24:43Oh, oh, oh, oh!
24:44Oh, oh, oh!
24:44Oh, oh, oh!
24:45Oh, oh, oh!
24:45Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
24:47Oh, oh, oh!
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