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00:00Today, on the best self-help show on TV,
00:04we will learn how to overcome life's barriers.
00:09We will discover that success is within reach.
00:13And we will exclusively showcase this summer's trending dance.
00:18Broadcasting live from a hammock on the beach comes Humor Amarillo,
00:22the only game show on world television in which participants take something home.
00:27For example, meniscus tears, ear fractures, inguinal hernias of varying severity,
00:34and above all, lots of laughter.
00:36The laughter of the contestants' friends and family when they see them bite the dust.
00:40And at the head of this nonsense is General Takeshi, the absolute leader of this group of human beings.
00:47Like this Atleti de Bilbao mushroom.
00:49This individual with a suspicious laugh.
00:51A pair of strongmen straight out of a circus, but despite their fierce appearance, they have a big heart.
00:55And besides, the boss laughs at his jokes.
00:58And the typical Japanese ones, which here are called Tao Tao.
01:04And without further ado, let the contest begin.
01:07Cars onward!
01:08But before hostilities begin, let's meet the faces of the men and women who are here to give their all.
01:19But above all, they come to bang their fists against the ground.
01:22Right?
01:23Don't be fooled.
01:25Now they look very clean and smiling.
01:27But that will only last a few seconds.
01:29For example, these girls who come directly from Okinawa,
01:32They have taken classes with Mr. Miyagi, the Karate Kid teacher.
01:35And they have learned the great master's lesson very well.
01:38They have come here to give wax and receive wax.
01:40Well, more like just receiving wax.
01:44As Pepe Livingstone warns us, the Little Wall of China has already ended the careers of several yellow comedy contestants.
01:50And for the unbelievers, there we have the proof.
01:53He is the spitting image of a participant from the previous program.
01:56It's the spitting image because it was imprinted.
01:59Pepe Livingstone tells us that it took four days to get the contestant off the wall.
02:03But the contestant is in perfect condition.
02:06Better than ever.
02:07But let's get to the point.
02:08Today's contestants.
02:10Some naive spectator might believe that water is being poured on the other side of the Little Wall of China.
02:15so that participants do not get hurt when falling down the slope.
02:18Well no!
02:19It's not water, but oil.
02:21And they do it so that the contestants slip and fall into the mud pool.
02:26That's mean-spirited and the rest is nonsense.
02:28Let's look at a nice example.
02:30Straight to the pylon.
02:33Several viewers have asked us how it is possible that the Japanese do not crowd together to jump.
02:39Well, because they go by number, like in the fish market.
02:42Let's see what number they go for.
02:43The 202, the 128, the 47, the 83, the 54.
02:48Let them jump now, man!
02:49If there is nothing like the oriental organization.
02:52So comfortable.
03:05And now only the battalion of the clumsy remains.
03:07That group formed by people who in school got very good grades in math and language,
03:12but he never passed gymnastics.
03:14Like this girl, who no matter how hard she tries, can't get to the other side.
03:18And so that it can be seen that in a yellow world we also know how to be good people,
03:22let's give him a hand.
03:24Because she's worth it.
03:24Come on, can I help you get to the other side?
03:28Come on, yes, please.
03:29But that's a bit of a cheat, you know?
03:32I want to move on to the next phase.
03:33Do you care that much about winning?
03:35If not, it would have been foolish of you to have come all the way here.
03:37Come on, I'll give you a little push, okay?
03:40May it be big.
03:41Big?
03:42It's going to fit you.
03:50Are you OK?
03:51You've hurt yourself, honey.
03:53Come on, now a big, big push.
03:54Are you OK?
03:58Did you hurt yourself, pretty girl?
04:00Have I passed the wall yet?
04:01Come on, let's go, I'll help you again.
04:03I'm going to give you such a push that you're going to fly away.
04:06Please don't help me anymore.
04:07Leave it, go on.
04:09Ungrateful.
04:10I'm going to help you, whether you want it or not.
04:12You'll pass that test thanks to my mistakes.
04:15Go help someone else, please come.
04:18No, no, I'll help you.
04:19Come on, you run and I'll push you.
04:21Mom, I want to go with my mom.
04:24Come on, let's jump.
04:27You came here to jump, yes or no?
04:29Jump.
04:37Leave it, I'm going home now, okay?
04:40A round of applause for this girl.
04:41Thank you, thank you.
04:44Well, you scumbags, you've seen what happens to those who ask for help.
04:47Let's see, you, do you want us to help you move on to the next phase?
04:51I'd rather not do it alone, okay?
04:53Well, you've already seen the little sign.
04:54There are only 95 of you left.
04:57And the next test is designed for all 95 of you to pass.
05:00All you have to do is stop them from breaking the paper cookie you're wearing on your face.
05:04Well, it reaches your ankles.
05:06Understood?
05:06Well, everything is ready for the assault on the castle.
05:13To make this test more spectacular, we have placed a camera on one of the defenders' machine guns.
05:20Let it not be said that at Humor Amarillo we do not deploy resources comparable to any Hollywood blockbuster.
05:26For those who love fun facts, this test is directly inspired by the anti-globalization protests.
05:34Well, it has adapted slightly.
05:36There are no police here handing out batons.
05:38Only pressurized water is thrown at the contestants.
05:41Yes, it is recycled water.
05:43Because Humor Amarillo complies with the Kyoto Protocol regulations.
05:46There's a reason Kyoto is in Japan.
05:48I've looked it up in the Atlas before.
05:49And we're going to talk to the contestant's ombudsman, who is in charge of protecting the rights of the Humor Amarillo contestants.
05:56Are you enjoying the contest, ma'am?
05:58Well yes.
05:59Any criticism?
06:00There should be more hits.
06:01More hits?
06:02How many?
06:04Well, 100 or 200 per contestant.
06:07Well, tell us what we can do to improve.
06:09Give it a go!
06:11Well, that's precisely where the contestants are headed.
06:13Let's give them a hard time!
06:14In fact, in a few moments we will be able to see how many times a man can take a ball without complaining.
06:21And what are they doing to me?
06:23Well, those balls don't have spikes either.
06:26They are just solid.
06:28Ah, so it's not that bad.
06:35We arrived at scare or death.
06:37The test in which contestants must traverse a labyrinth infested with dangers.
06:41But those dangers are two huge guys who haven't had breakfast this morning and whose goal is to cover the contestants' faces with mud.
06:49And if they resist, they get the octopus.
06:51Here comes the first contestant!
06:55Who almost killed himself before he even started.
06:58It's just that some people are going crazy.
07:00The truth is that it would have been better for him to fall at the beginning, because to do this...
07:12Look, Takeshi's cousin even lost his mustache from laughing.
07:19The next contestant has opted for caution.
07:23As if that would do him any good.
07:27You may notice the scenery has changed a little, a little more spectacular.
07:32Well, the thing is, we received a grant from the Ministry of Culture to paint the entrance and exit red.
07:38Of course, and that helps the contestants find their way around.
07:41Well, not this one.
07:42And there we have a contestant.
07:45This girl is fulfilling one of her biggest dreams: appearing on television.
07:49He has tried to participate in all the programs and Humor Amarillo has given him the alternative.
08:00Let's watch the interview our colleague Pepe Libiston conducted.
08:05Is it true that you love TV, Maja?
08:07Brother-in-law! Jesus got him!
08:10Who is Jesus?
08:11Why is Jesus going to be my brother-in-law?
08:14You should watch less TV and read more books, huh?
08:16No, it has letters, brother-in-law.
08:18I was going to ask you for a kiss, but with my teeth like this I don't really feel like it.
08:22Do you have a brush and can you give it to me?
08:24Oh, how funny you are, brother-in-law!
08:27This man is David Bisbal's choreographer.
08:30And he came to promote his next album.
08:35What strength!
08:37What power the choreographer has!
08:39Well, because of the choreographer, the next contestant is doomed.
08:46The two bad guys from the maze are dying of pain.
08:50And they're going to take them away from him.
08:52The molars, I mean.
08:53But he's raping her!
08:54This is another cautious contestant.
08:58He doesn't trust anything or anyone.
09:06I was wondering where the camera is placed to take such a spectacular aerial shot.
09:12It's not an aerial shot.
09:14What happens is that we shrink the contestants until they are 20 centimeters tall.
09:18and the set is actually a shoe box.
09:21Oh really?
09:22No, man, no, what a joke.
09:23The camera is mounted on a crane that we stole from there, from a construction site that was right next door.
09:28Takeshi is outraged.
09:29And his cousin still has his moustache hanging down.
09:34The next contestant is a famous Japanese poetess.
09:37And what are you doing here?
09:38Well, man, she's a sensitive soul, but the girl also likes to have fun.
09:43Ah!
09:43Ah!
09:44Ah!
09:45Ah!
09:45Ah!
09:46Ah!
09:48The poet deserves an interview.
09:53to tell us about his next book and those things that make Dumont Amarillo,
09:58a program worthy of the two.
10:02Hey, pretty girl, write me a poem, an easy little rhyme, even if it's just a couplet.
10:05Come on, I'll give you the first verse.
10:07Your teeth are black as coal.
10:09Come on, you.
10:12Let's move on to another verse.
10:13Let's play brush.
10:14I provide the stick and you...
10:16What do you put?
10:18Come on.
10:20I'll give you another one, come on.
10:22We play Milanese.
10:23It's like the teto, but...
10:26Finish the sentence?
10:28How is?
10:30Under the mass.
10:31Go on, look how you really knew this one, eh, poetess?
10:34Well, it's true that she was a very, very sensitive girl.
10:37As it is, but she has passed the test.
10:47The one who is not sensitive is this one, who just pointed out his macazones before entering.
10:52Well, these types of gestures or gestures are not allowed in this program.
10:56So hit it hard, hard.
10:59Let's see what the contestant's defender has to say about this test.
11:02Did you like this test?
11:05Yeah.
11:06What did you like the most?
11:07The girls who cried.
11:08Both?
11:09Yeah.
11:09And that's what you liked the most?
11:11People come here to writhe in pain, and they've succeeded.
11:14Tell us what we can do to improve.
11:16Make everyone cry!
11:18Well, we're going to give the contestant's defender some joy,
11:21because we have reached one of the most evil tests of yellow humor.
11:25The hamburgers.
11:26But this is the 2006 version, which is more annoying.
11:29Yes, because contestants who overcome the burgers will no longer have to face four doors,
11:33two of which are walled up.
11:34No, they will have to face eight doors, four of which are walled up, making it even more difficult.
11:40But let's go to the empirical demonstration.
11:42The guy dressed as his favorite band, Kiss, has gone into the water.
11:46Well, this one has ruined the hamburger.
11:50That had to hurt, huh?
11:52Nah, nothing has been done.
11:54But what does it teach us? They don't have any hits there.
11:57Well it hurt a lot!
12:03Let's watch the replay with our super slow motion.
12:06What agility, Celina! What precise movements! What muscular flexibility!
12:10How well he jumped into the water!
12:18As Takeshi says, if all the contestants were like that, we'd have a great show.
12:25Walking slower doesn't mean you'll avoid fake burgers.
12:28Phew! That scream gave me goosebumps, huh?
12:39And as an innovation in this program, we have introduced water jets.
12:44They don't do anything, but they look pretty.
12:46And then a famous Japanese comedian competes.
12:57Carmen Machi Oh!
13:03This girl has some bruises...
13:05In the interview with Pepe Libistón, we can see how fun this girl is.
13:13What kind of comedian is this? She doesn't make any jokes. She just laughs.
13:18That Japanese comedians are like that.
13:20They are the ones laughing, not the audience.
13:23Well, it's going to be true that it's a very different culture from ours.
13:26That stride didn't bode well!
13:42As the Japanese saying goes, having long legs doesn't mean the sun rises earlier.
13:47No, no, no! No, no! No, no!
13:49No, no! No, no! No, no!
13:50This is the quiet man.
13:58Well, more than calm, he is the heavy man.
14:03Because we actually hear the shouts in Japanese from the other shore.
14:08And we proceed to translate.
14:13Come on, man, we don't have all day!
14:16Where did you buy that tracksuit?
14:20People are leaving us! Hurry up, man!
14:24I really like your shoes!
14:27Wear socks, it's more hygienic!
14:32They don't put!
14:34Hit the bad door! Joey! You don't pay attention to anything, huh!
14:38Come on, now! Against the bad guy! Remember, the bad guy!
14:43And pay attention, because now comes Miss Playboy Japan.
14:48But is this Miss Playboy Japan?
14:50What month? What year?
14:52I have the calendar and I don't remember seeing it, eh.
14:55Let's see if instead of the Playboy calendar, it appears in the Talleres Martínez calendar.
15:01Well, that's what it's going to be, huh.
15:03And watch out for the next individual to compete, because he is a cheater.
15:14Yes, he's dressed in the armor of the Knights of the Zodiac, but he's also a trickster.
15:23First trap we've seen from you.
15:25Second trap, this is almost worse, huh.
15:32Well, you're going to find out, you're going to eat the door.
15:36Well, not this one, the next one.
15:40Wow! Punished for cheating.
15:42This makes Takeshi and company laugh a lot, because in Yellow Humor there is justice.
15:50But let's talk to the cheater.
15:52I haven't cheated, eh?
15:54Yes of course.
15:54Knights of the Zodiac never cheat, just so you know.
15:57Well, yes, I admit it. I've cheated a little, but only a little.
16:02I'm just a little shaken up by the blow.
16:05Be quiet!
16:07In case there is any doubt, and so that it can be seen that at Humor Amarillo we play fair with the contestants,
16:12sometimes we repeat the play.
16:20And as our airheaded contestants head off to the next test,
16:24We announce that Superman will be with us next.
16:28But is that Superman?
16:30Well, that's what he told us.
16:32But he has to prove it.
16:36Will Superman fly or is this a fraud?
16:39We'll find out in a few moments.
16:42And what is certainly not a fraud is the avalanche of hits that fall on this poor man.
16:48No one has suffered such a harsh punishment on Humor Amarillo since the previous program.
16:52It almost makes me feel sorry for him.
16:55You'll get over it.
16:56Will he make it to the other side or will he be knocked down by the 50th hit?
17:01The answer in a few moments.
17:03And we come to the Liete tú de la liana test.
17:06The contestants must fly over a mud puddle hanging from a rope to either land on a mound,
17:12or have a spectacular crash.
17:14We don't want middle ground.
17:16This test is inspired by a well-known film by Mariano Zores,
17:20Christopher Columbus, discoverer by trade.
17:22But what are you saying, man, if music is made of magic dust?
17:28Ah, well you're probably right if you want to go to music.
17:34Takeshi's cousin is laughing so hard he's lost his mustache.
17:37The contestant dressed as a gas station attendant has just fallen in love with the stone.
17:49You have found your soulmate.
17:51We will not repeat this landing again because it would be too cruel.
18:11Although Takeshi wants to see him again.
18:13Come on, champ! You can do it!
18:29But if it is supported on the ground.
18:31This one is doing theater.
18:33Well, but it's more exciting this way.
18:36How curious!
18:37This one only laughs when he's not wearing his mustache.
18:39We repeat this beautiful execution.
18:45The question is, where did this Japanese man want to go?
18:48Up?
18:49And what did you expect to find up there?
18:54It's true.
18:55He only laughs when he doesn't have a mustache.
18:58And pay attention because Superman is coming.
19:02How odd!
19:03Why does he need to hold on to the rope if he can fly?
19:07Maybe it's because it's off-peak.
19:10It no longer flies, it only lands.
19:12But let's talk to this man who in times A was a superhero.
19:15The greatest superhero on Earth after Super Lopez.
19:22Okay, but stop laughing today and let's interview him.
19:26But are you the real Superman?
19:27Yeah, what happens is that kryptonite, you know.
19:30Wow!
19:31But you have come with your whole family.
19:32Luisa Lane, Superboy...
19:34A few words of yellow humor, Superboy.
19:36What did you think of your super dad's performance?
19:38Wow!
19:41He's hurt himself there, right?
19:43On the bump.
19:44Well, I think it was Lace Luthor's fault.
19:50And we continue with the blows.
19:52It has been believed that the vine is the pendulum of a clock.
20:06Ticking.
20:07Ticking.
20:08General Takeshi says that if the contestant was a pendulum, it's already three o'clock.
20:22He has taken three blows like three suns, my friend.
20:31Awesome.
20:31That's an Olympic athlete at the very least, huh?
20:33Like the next contestant.
20:39The thing is that his discipline is diving.
20:44And pay attention, because now comes the Chinese Cudeiro.
20:48The legendary yellow comedy contestant who never gives up.
20:51Damn you!
20:53You have drowned the Chinese Cudeiro!
21:00And don't laugh, he's dead!
21:02What did you think about what happened to the Chinese Cudeiro?
21:04Let's see.
21:05Very good.
21:05But he hasn't felt sorry.
21:06It's been a lot of fun.
21:08Did he laugh?
21:08A lot.
21:09How much?
21:10Well, I almost peed myself, I won't tell you any more.
21:13But tell us, what can we do to improve?
21:15You're going to shit!
21:16And watch out, because we're coming to one of the toughest tests conceived by the twisted minds running this program.
21:23It's the duel at the rising sun!
21:26The poor contestants have to face a fearsome army.
21:31A tank, a plane, two missiles.
21:35Two milestones.
21:37And a series of secret weapons never seen before on this show.
21:41For example...
21:43A boot!
21:43A...
21:46A...
21:46A pear.
21:48That...
21:48I think it is a tick.
21:50And a giant lobster.
21:52I wonder, how big would the paella be that would fit that lobster?
21:57You can tell it's lunchtime, huh?
21:59So while Takeshi contemplates his armies ready to enter combat, I'm going to see if I can get myself a sausage sandwich.
22:06But man, please, we're live.
22:09Can't you eat a sausage sandwich in the middle of the show?
22:12And chorizo?
22:13Neither.
22:14And ham and cheese?
22:16Less.
22:17And a three-delight rice?
22:19It's oriental, that's what it's supposed to be.
22:20Nothing at all.
22:21And shut up, the test is starting.
22:2423 contestants face Takeshi's army.
22:27How many will make it to the next phase?
22:31Well, I think everyone does, because it's a pretty pitiful army.
22:35They have nothing more to do with the salt shaker.
22:36Pay attention, because the contestants have Takeshi's army surrounded.
22:49They are like General Caster's seventh cavalry.
22:52They died with their boots on.
22:54And indeed all the contestants move on to the next phase.
23:04But this one isn't going to be that easy.
23:06The hot hit.
23:08Takeshi's henchmen will mercilessly shoot at the contestants until they fall to the ground.
23:13Or even leave them crippled.
23:16Whatever comes first.
23:20Here comes the first sucker.
23:24Willing to become a human target.
23:31And you might ask at home, why don't they shoot?
23:34Because they are aiming.
23:36As soon as they shoot, they hit it and throw it on the first try.
23:39Hala, the first contestant in the bucket!
23:46Takeshi asks to shoot the ball harder.
23:50So the next one has to get ready because he's going to get really bad.
24:00Well, they listened to him, right?
24:02Man, he's the boss.
24:03As you can see, the hot shot gunners always shoot at the contestants' weak points.
24:12More than to the weak points, to the sensitive areas.
24:17Specifically, they like to shoot at the rolls.
24:22As everyone knows, it's a very soft area where hitting the ball hurts a lot.
24:28Takeshi has taken pity and orders that poor contestant to move on to the next phase.
24:39But he's not going to take mercy on this one.
24:41We have been announcing it throughout the program.
24:43How many balls can a human being take without screaming?
24:47Let's tell it.
24:48That one is worth triple, three.
24:50Four.
24:52Five.
24:53Six.
24:55That seven is worth double, eight.
24:57They have not failed.
25:00Nine.
25:02The one with the face is worth ten, twenty.
25:06Well, thirty-two hits.
25:09Thirty-three, thirty-four, thirty-five.
25:13Let's leave it at fifty and neither for you nor for me.
25:16Look, he's taken off his gloves.
25:17Well, look, we left them at forty-nine.
25:20Well, that's been forty-nine hits.
25:22Two bruises each, ninety-eight bruises!
25:25Tan, tan, tan, tarararararán, tarán.
25:30And we see Pepe Livingstone who is with the battered contestant's girlfriend.
25:34The girl had a nervous breakdown.
25:36As if she had taken the forty-nine shots.
25:40But it hasn't been exaggerated or anything.
25:46I don't think she had a nervous breakdown, it's just that the girl is like that.
25:49And while the girl is acting crazy, the one who has really taken the blows is smiling.
25:53And there we have David Bisbal's choreographer, who has promised that at the end of the program he will show us the new steps the singer is rehearsing.
26:01Well then let's eliminate him quickly and avoid that trouble.
26:06Well, I don't think it matters, because the guy is going to start dancing anyway.
26:09Well, handsome, show us that fun dance you've prepared for this summer's parties.
26:16Come on, go for it, champ.
26:21Now me.
26:26So, Hail Mary, when will you be mine?
26:29Without you I would be worthless.
26:32After this unfortunate moment, we move on to what matters most: the indiscriminate attack on La Lorja.
26:39As you can see, this man lost a shoe with a ball.
26:46And it's a shame, because they were some pretty expensive shoes that he had bought, they were brand name, and he had left all the kings in those shoes.
26:56General Takishi is thinking of turning the contestant around, because he's already done in on this side.
27:00It seemed like he was going to escape alive, but no.
27:10In the end they hit him the way they had to hit him, really hard.
27:14Mario orders the next one to come.
27:16Come on.
27:16Attention, because this man has caught the ball with his lacasones.
27:25Come on, because you're clever, take this one.
27:27Take this one, dude, come on, see if you can catch it.
27:29Take another one, let's see.
27:31Come on, take that one, you smart guy.
27:36There he almost got that one.
27:37Well, it has happened.
27:43Incredible, what a shame, during children's hours.
27:45And since we loved throwing balls at the contestants so much, we're putting together a summary of the best hits.
27:52And we end this summary, as expected, with the man who lost his love handles.
28:07And his girlfriend, of course.
28:14And these are today's winners.
28:16They timidly emerge from the hole because they still can't believe they've reached the end.
28:20In fact, they are convinced that they are still going to receive a few more blows.
28:24But that won't be here anymore.
28:26If you want to be hit by balls and rolled on the ground, go to another show, man.
28:33We're leaving now, reminding you that in the next episode of Humor Amarillo we'll see an incredible car race.
28:41Even Fernando Alonso himself would like to participate in it.
28:50But before we go, let's hear what the contestant's advocate has to say about today's show.
28:55Did you like Humor Amarillo? It's cool, isn't it?
28:59Yeah.
29:00Have we gone too far or what?
29:02Yes, I sound soft.
29:03Soft?
29:03Well yes.
29:04Why do you say that?
29:05Well, since they don't push harder, this won't work at all.
29:08Tell us what we can do to improve.
29:10Crush them!
29:11Well, after this wise advice from the contestant's advocate, we only have one thing left to say.
29:18Don't try this at home, it's dangerous.
29:21And since we're so nice, we'll give you the names of everyone who participated in today's program.
29:27The number written next to each name is not the age of each contestant,
29:31but the number of teeth they have lost during the course of the program.
29:35Well, there's more than one dentist who's going to make a fortune with this Yellow Humor, right?
29:38And we say goodbye until the next program.
29:40Bye bye!
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29:45
29:49
29:36
29:46
Sé la primera persona en añadir un comentario