- hace 5 meses
Max has Big Eddie Little in custody but his friends help him escape. Max is able to wound him but he gets away. While visiting their newborns at the hospital, Max and 99 are mistaken for a doctor and his nurse who are then kidnapped to Eddie's hideout to treat the gunshot wound inflicted by Max.
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00:00THE END
00:10Correct me if I'm wrong, but ain't today the day they're transferring my boss Billy Eddie Little to death row?
00:17That's correct.
00:18So what are we doing sitting here in this here car in this one-horse town?
00:22Because Control knows that we intend to intercept him and free Big Eddie.
00:26So why are we waiting for him at the train terminal, Deepak?
00:29Because that's not the way they're transporting Big Eddie.
00:31It's not. Then how are they gonna do it?
00:34By a very clever, ingenious method.
00:38Turn around.
00:40The Dennisville Federal Penitentiary is only six miles from here. That's where we leave the race and drop off Big Eddie.
00:49Right, Chief. I'm gonna move up and check with Larrabee.
00:51Well, it won't be long now, Big Eddie. Tomorrow at this time, it'll be all over for you.
01:00Yeah. The judge once told me that someday I'd walk the last mile.
01:02If it had told me I'd have to walk 50 miles to get to the last mile.
01:05Better go on straight.
01:06So that's the way they're gonna do it. That certainly explains a lot of things.
01:11Like you asking me to come to work on my underwear.
01:13So far, Larrabee, I'm certain we've outwitted chaos, but keep your eyes open. We can't be too careful.
01:17Right, Chief.
01:18Is something wrong?
01:19I stepped on a mail, Chief, and it's killing me.
01:20Why don't you stop and take it out?
01:21And lose the lead?
01:22They're coming. Now do exactly as I told you.
01:25Come on.
01:26Come on, we're going straight.
01:27So that's the way they're gonna do it.
01:28That's the way they're gonna do it.
01:29That certainly explains a lot of things.
01:31Like you asking me to come to work on my underwear.
01:33So far, Larrabee, I'm certain we've outwitted chaos, but keep your eyes open.
01:35We can't be too careful.
01:36Right, Chief.
01:37Is something wrong?
01:38I stepped on a mail, Chief, and it's killing me.
01:41Why don't you stop and take it out?
01:43And lose the lead?
01:44They're coming.
01:45Now do exactly as I told you.
01:48Max!
02:17What happened?
02:18Well, I don't know, Chief.
02:19He was just here a second ago.
02:20Chief, look.
02:21Max, they're getting away.
02:22Oh, no, they're not.
02:23Stand back, Chief.
02:24Come on.
02:25Look.
02:26What a time to run out of bullets.
02:28I'm gonna get you.
02:29I'm gonna get you.
02:30I'll kill him.
02:31So help me.
02:32I'm gonna kill that man.
02:33Max, you winged him.
02:34Well, you could hardly miss at this range, Chief.
02:41Come on.
02:42Come on.
02:43Come on.
02:44Come on.
02:45Come on.
02:46Come on.
02:47Come on.
02:48Come on.
02:49Come on.
02:50Come on.
02:51Come on.
02:52I'll kill him.
02:53I'll kill him.
02:54I'll kill him.
02:55I'll kill him.
02:56I'll kill him.
02:57I know you will.
02:58If it's the last thing I do, I'll get that smart.
03:01I know you will.
03:02I know you will.
03:03If it's the last thing I do, I'll get that smart.
03:05I know you will.
03:06So hurry one way out.
03:07I know you will.
03:08Get in the car.
03:09Hurry up.
03:10Hurry up.
03:11Get the car out of here.
03:12I'll get you, smart.
03:14Try and get the number, Max.
03:17I got it, Chief.
03:191-4-7-8-3-6-5-2.
03:21Good.
03:22We'll call the state police, give them that number, and have them pick up the car.
03:24And pick up the shirt.
03:25What shirt?
03:26Big Eddie's shirt.
03:27That's the number I got.
03:31It's the number I got.
03:33What shirt?
03:34It's the number I got.
03:35Yeah, it's the number I got.
03:36No, no.
03:37It's the number I got.
03:39The number I got.
03:40But we'll call me.
03:41The number I got.
03:42All right, boys.
03:43We gotta do it.
03:44I'll get the number I got.
03:45Yeah.
03:46Yeah.
03:47Yeah.
03:49Hey.
03:50¶¶
04:20¶¶
04:47No trace at all? Well, what about the roadblocks?
04:49How many have been set up throughout the area?
04:50Say, that's a beautiful trophy they gave you
04:53for winning the marathon race, Larrabee.
04:54You must be very thrilled.
04:55I am. Now we have a set.
04:57I have one. My wife has one.
04:58Your wife is a professional marathon walker?
05:01No, she's a professional wrestler.
05:03Your wife is a professional wrestler?
05:05You probably saw her wrestle lots of times on television,
05:07didn't know it.
05:08Really?
05:09Did you ever see Battling Biff Bannister?
05:11Big, tall, built like an ox,
05:13always wore a black hood over the face?
05:15Your wife wrestled Battling Biff Bannister?
05:19My wife is Battling Biff Bannister.
05:22All right, let me know the minute something breaks.
05:25Larrabee, I want you to get me the flight schedule
05:29of all planes leaving Washington in the next two hours.
05:32Right, Chief.
05:34Well, this is a fine time you picked to leave town, Chief,
05:37while Big Eddie is still on the loose.
05:39I'm not leaving town, Max. You are.
05:41Me? I can't leave town, Chief.
05:43My wife just gave birth to twins.
05:45I haven't even brought them home from the hospital yet.
05:47Max, when you wounded Big Eddie Little,
05:49you signed your own death warrant.
05:51If he lives, you won't.
05:53He is not only the most brutal, ruthless killer in the underworld,
05:57he's also the most vengeful.
05:59I'm sorry, Chief. I'm not leaving town.
06:01I've got to go to the hospital now and pick up 99.
06:04Max, he'll follow you to the four corners of the earth to get you.
06:07You'll never know a moment's rest.
06:09You'll jump every time you hear a noise.
06:11You'll look at every dark shadow,
06:12wondering if Big Eddie Little is lurking there.
06:14That may be so, Chief,
06:16but I don't even know the meaning of the word fear.
06:18Big Eddie Little has killed 43 men in cold blood.
06:22Fear.
06:24A sense of uneasiness caused by a feeling of unending danger
06:29or a state of dread or loss.
06:37And police have cordoned off an eight-mile area
06:39in the belief that Big Eddie the Enforcer Little
06:41is trapped somewhere inside it.
06:43Roadblocks have been set up
06:44and authorities have cautioned all citizens to...
06:47Stupid, incompetent police.
06:50They have us trapped.
06:52It's only a matter of time before they close in.
06:56We could only move Big Eddie.
06:58I got it!
06:59You got the bullet out?
07:00No, I got the stain out.
07:02What a waste of time trying to get the stain out for...
07:05You don't know Big Eddie.
07:06He's a classy dresser.
07:07He wouldn't go to a hospital with a solid suit.
07:09We can't take any chances moving him to a hospital.
07:11We got to get the bullet out here.
07:13Well, if you want me to try, I'll be happy to oblige.
07:15Have you ever done this before?
07:16Once with a contemporary of mine who was injured
07:18during the business confab.
07:20Did you successfully remove the bullet?
07:23I didn't have any Anastasia.
07:25So I put a bullet between his teeth
07:27and I told him to bite down hard.
07:30The trouble was he bit down too hard
07:33and the bullet went off and it hit me.
07:35Refresh action.
07:36So I took out my gun, I let him have it.
07:39You mean, you shot him?
07:41It was self-defense.
07:42He shot me in the throat.
07:43I want you to know that prior to that incident,
07:46I was a tenner.
07:48You guys knock it off and get me a doctor?
07:52I got a day to keep with that Maxwell Smart.
07:55When I find him, I'm gonna...
07:58He passed out again.
08:00He's lost a lot of blood.
08:01And he's not gonna be getting any better
08:03while that bullet's still in his shoulder.
08:05Put a bullet right...
08:09Didn't we pass a hospital on the way here?
08:11Yeah, I remember a sign that said,
08:12Don't hunger.
08:13That hospital couldn't be any more
08:14than two or three miles from here.
08:16Right, true.
08:17Maxwell Smart's head.
08:20No, no.
08:21That's too good for him.
08:22You know what I'm gonna do?
08:24I'm gonna...
08:27Still, it would be too dangerous
08:28to try to bring him to the hospital.
08:29What are we gonna do?
08:31If you can't bring Muhammad to the mountain,
08:36you bring the mountain to Muhammad.
08:38Do you understand?
08:39You want me to go to the Poconos
08:40and bring Dr. Muhammad and tell him to come in?
08:43I'm gonna put his feet in cement
08:46and drop him in the river.
08:48No, the river ain't deep enough.
08:52You know what I'm gonna do?
08:54I'm gonna...
08:56He's getting delirious.
08:57We can't waste any more time.
08:58All right.
08:59Now you go to the hospital.
09:00Find a doctor and bring him here.
09:01Suppose he refuses to come.
09:03Then you persuade him.
09:04I think you know how.
09:05Oh, you want me to tell him
09:07my little daughter is very sick?
09:09Whatever you wish.
09:10Only make sure he comes.
09:11You leave it to me, Cortez.
09:13Okay, go out the back way.
09:15Might be dark by the time you return.
09:17So remember, we're in the cabin near the lake.
09:19Cabin near the lake.
09:21The cabin near the lake.
09:22The cabin near the lake.
09:23The cabin near the lake.
09:32The cabin overlooked the lake.
09:34The cabin near the lake.
09:47Call for Dr. Carsoff.
09:57Hi.
09:58I'm Maxwell Smart.
09:59Oh, Mr. Smart.
10:00How nice to see you.
10:01Shh.
10:02Could you hold it down, please?
10:03Oh, what's the matter with your throat, Mr. Smart? Laryngitis?
10:06I can get a doctor and have it sprayed. It won't take but a minute.
10:09There's nothing wrong with my throat.
10:11I just came here to pick up my wife and the twins and take them home,
10:14and I don't want the whole world to know I'm here.
10:16Oh, it's a secret, huh?
10:18Huh?
10:19A secret.
10:20Yes, a secret.
10:21Well, I've got a secret for you.
10:24You can't take the twins home for another few days.
10:27You're kidding!
10:28I know how you must feel, but it's only for a few days.
10:32They're not up to wait yet.
10:34Mrs. Smart is in the incubator room with the twins now.
10:38Oh, Mr. Smart, you'll have to put on a sterile mask and gown before you go in there.
10:45Oh, Mr. Smart!
10:56Would you mind not shouting my name all over the hospital?
10:59I can't afford to call attention to myself.
11:02Oh, Max, aren't they beautiful.
11:09I wish we could take them home right away.
11:12Well, don't worry, 99.
11:13It'll only be a couple of days.
11:14Besides, you need time to get your strength back.
11:16But I feel absolutely marvelous.
11:17I've never felt better in my life.
11:19I'm worried about you, though, Max.
11:21Oh, you mean Big Ed.
11:22Yes.
11:23Why don't you do what the chief said and go away for a couple of days?
11:26Well, I'm not going to leave you and the babies alone, 99.
11:28Besides, I don't think there's anything to worry about.
11:30Big Ed will be caught within the next 12 hours,
11:32and all I have to do is find some place to lay low where he can't find me.
11:35Where?
11:36Rome.
11:37Don't be serious, Max.
11:38There must be something to go away.
11:39Don't move, Doc.
11:40You're coming with me.
11:41You too, Nancy.
11:42You too, Nancy.
12:04A rope.
12:05I'll tie a rope around his neck.
12:12I'm a nurse.
12:13Excellent.
12:14All right.
12:15You can remove your blindfolds now.
12:16No.
12:17No.
12:18No.
12:19No.
12:20No.
12:21No.
12:22No.
12:23No.
12:24No.
12:25No.
12:26No.
12:27No.
12:28No.
12:29No.
12:30No.
12:31No.
12:32No.
12:33No.
12:34No.
12:35No.
12:36No.
12:37No.
12:38No.
12:39No.
12:40No.
12:41No.
12:43Where are we?
12:44Please, you must forgive our methods, but it was imperative that we get you here, Doctor.
12:47Now look.
12:48I'm gonna explain this to you once more, like I explained it to him at the hospital and in the
12:52car.
12:53You have made a terrible mistake!
12:54I am not a doctor!
12:56Now you listen to me.
12:57There's a man dying in that bedroom, and you were brought here to save his life.
13:01The only thing that keeps me from pullin' this trigger is the fact that you're a doctor.
13:05Did you hear that nurse?
13:07I certainly did, Doctor.
13:09Uh, what seems to be wrong with this man?
13:13He's got a bullet in the shoulder.
13:15Ah, well, of course you know I am required by a law
13:18to report all gunshot wounds.
13:20Except in the shoulder.
13:22Where's the surgical bag?
13:24Huh? Oh, the surgical bag, yes.
13:27Do you have the surgical bag, nurse?
13:29No, doctor, I thought you had it.
13:30Oh, we must have left it back at the hospital.
13:32Well, we can't go in there and operate
13:34without the proper surgical tools, can we?
13:36I'm afraid we'll have to go back to the hospital.
13:38Of course, under the circumstances,
13:40there'll be no charge for this house call.
13:42Hold it.
13:44While I was in the hospital, I stole a surgical bag.
13:47It's in the car.
13:48Go get it.
13:49Okay.
13:50A plane and a train.
13:52I'll drop them from a plane in front of a train.
13:58Wait here.
14:00What are we gonna do, Max?
14:02There's only one thing we can do.
14:07I'm gonna have to operate 99.
14:08Max, you can't do that.
14:09You're not a doctor.
14:10But I don't have any alternative.
14:12I'm gonna have to go in there
14:13and take that bullet out of that shoulder.
14:15Max, you can't.
14:16You're so squeamish.
14:17You can't even stand the sight of blood.
14:19Yes.
14:20Well, I don't plan to watch.
14:21There's your bag.
14:23Go ahead, get in there.
14:24You too, mercy.
14:25Come on.
14:26Come on.
14:27Let's go.
14:28Come on.
14:29Come on.
14:30Come on.
14:33Well, now, I think the first thing we should do
14:35is take a look at the patient.
14:39Let's see.
14:43Nurse, look at these hands.
14:44They're beautiful.
14:45They're so delicate.
14:46Is this man a famous musician?
14:48You're close.
14:49He's a famous hoodlum.
14:50That's Big Eddie Little.
14:54Who's voice do I hear?
14:57It's a doctor, Big Eddie.
14:59I brought you a doctor.
15:00Good boy, Al.
15:01Come here, Doc.
15:03I want to tell you something.
15:05Uh, you're a mask doctor.
15:07Oh, yes.
15:11Look, Doc.
15:12You gotta pull me through.
15:14You gotta see that I live long enough
15:16to get even with the guy that done this to me.
15:18Don't worry, Big Eddie.
15:20We're here to help you.
15:21Enough talk.
15:22Remove the bullet.
15:23What bullet?
15:24The bullet in his shoulder, doctor.
15:26Oh, that bullet.
15:27Yes.
15:28Well, I think we should clear the room, nurse.
15:30Right.
15:31Uh, if you gentlemen will just step out now,
15:33the doctor will let you know when he's finished.
15:35Remember, he dies, you die.
15:40That's not fair.
15:41I die either way.
15:42Max, quick.
15:43Now's our chance to contact the chief.
15:45What?
15:46There's no phone up here, 99.
15:47Max, your shoe.
15:48Right.
15:57I don't like this, Larrabee.
15:59Big Eddie is still on the loose,
16:00and Max and 99 disappeared right out of that hospital
16:02and hadn't been heard from since.
16:03What don't you like about it, chief?
16:05What could they be?
16:09Hello?
16:10It's Max.
16:11Say hello for me.
16:12Go on, Max.
16:13Where are you?
16:14Chief, I can't talk too loud.
16:16Now listen carefully.
16:1799 and I have been captured by Big Eddie.
16:20We're being held captive in a cabin on the shores of a lake.
16:24I'll be there as soon as I can with every available man.
16:27Now pinpoint for me exactly where the cabin is.
16:30Get on the other phone, Larrabee.
16:32Now look, chief.
16:33Even though we were blindfolded when we left the hospital,
16:35I think I can tell you exactly how we got here.
16:38Go on, Max.
16:39Get this down, Larrabee.
16:40After we left the hospital,
16:41we drove about 12 blocks and came to a stop.
16:44Then we heard church bells.
16:45They rang seven times.
16:46Then we made a left turn and drove about...
16:48How far, 99?
16:49About five miles, chief.
16:51And then just before we left that road,
16:53we passed a place where I heard a banging and scraping
16:55and twisting of metal.
16:57I guess it was an auto wrecking yard.
16:59It was a parking lot, chief.
17:01Then we went through a long tunnel,
17:03made a turn and came onto a bumpy road.
17:05Then we made a right turn, came onto a mountain road,
17:07drove for about 12 minutes until we got here.
17:10We're being held in a two-room cabin overlooking a lake.
17:14I know that place.
17:15I was stationed near there when I was in the army.
17:17Max, we're on our way.
17:19Okay, Larrabee.
17:20Where is it?
17:21Six miles south of Berlin.
17:25What do we do until they get here, Max?
17:27We'll have to stall.
17:28How?
17:29I don't know, but let's make it look like we're doing our job.
17:31Come over here and help me get them up and walk them around the room.
17:33Well, what do you want to do that for?
17:34Well, 99, everybody knows that walking is good for you.
17:37I don't want to feel a bullet in your shoulder, Max.
17:39That's in case you've taken an overdose of sleeping pills.
17:41Oh, well, maybe I've got some sleeping pills in my bag.
17:44Nice.
17:45Where's the talk?
17:46Is the bullet out?
17:47Check it out.
17:48It's all right, Big Eddie.
17:49We're just gonna change your dressing now.
17:50Doctor, may I have the basin, please?
17:53Don't worry, Big Eddie.
17:54We'll have that bullet out of there in no time.
18:03It's the bullet, 99.
18:05It must have come out when you slapped him on the back.
18:07What's technically so wrong?
18:09Relax.
18:10The bullet in the shoulder just doesn't pop out by itself, you know.
18:13Yeah, that's true.
18:15But what are we gonna do with it, Max?
18:17Shh.
18:18Well, I think we can get this bullet out of here in no time at all.
18:22Big Eddie, Big Eddie, wake up.
18:25I want to talk to you.
18:26He can't hear you, Max.
18:27He's really out this time.
18:28Big Eddie.
18:29What?
18:30Big Eddie, wake up.
18:31I want to talk to you.
18:32What is it, Doc?
18:33I think it's only fair to warn you, I don't have an anesthetic.
18:38Go ahead, Doc.
18:40I can take it.
18:42Okay, but I don't think you should watch.
18:45Yeah.
18:49Okay.
18:50Now, according to my calculations, the bullet should be somewhere in the upper torso,
18:55around the shoulder area.
18:57I would say that it would be about halfway between the head and the fingers.
19:03However, I'm sure that we can get it out.
19:06Okay, nurse, are you ready?
19:07All ready, Doctor.
19:08Okay.
19:09Give me one of those things.
19:10The scalpel, Doctor?
19:11Yes, whatever.
19:12Would you like a sponge?
19:13Uh, yes.
19:14Give me one of those, too.
19:15Uh, are you ready for a suture?
19:17Uh, sure, sure.
19:18Suture, suture.
19:19What about the thermostat, Doctor?
19:20Uh, yes.
19:21Well, it seems fairly comfortable in this room, but if you're a little warm, I could turn it down.
19:25All right, Big Eddie.
19:26Here we go.
19:27I'm going in and get it.
19:28Are you ready?
19:29Cake.
19:30Cake.
19:31Um.
19:32Um.
19:33Um.
19:34Um.
19:35Um.
19:36Um.
19:37Um.
19:38Got it.
19:39Good work, Doctor.
19:40Doc.
19:41Doc.
19:42You've got golden hands.
19:45I didn't feel a thing.
19:46Well, that's one of the advantages of working with a skilled surgeon.
19:50Nice.
19:51Would you mind asking Al to come in here, please?
19:53Of course.
19:55Doc.
19:56Doc.
19:57No matter what the outside world may think of me.
20:00Among my peers, I'm considered a well-meaning, good-natured slob.
20:05You saved my life, Doc.
20:07Big Eddie won't forget.
20:09From now on, until your dying day, anything you want in the world.
20:13Anything!
20:14I'm gonna see you get it.
20:17Well, thank you very much, Big Eddie.
20:19That's very nice of you.
20:20My pleasure.
20:21Goodbye, and good luck.
20:27How do you feel?
20:29Just fine, Al.
20:30Just fine.
20:31Isn't that Doc?
20:32He's okay in my book.
20:34What do you want me to do with him?
20:36Kill him.
20:37What about the nurse?
20:38Al.
20:39The nurse happens to be a lady.
20:42Kill her first.
20:44Well, that just about wraps things up here.
20:48My nurse and I are due back at the hospital, so we'd appreciate it if you'd give us a ride back if it's not too much trouble.
20:55Oh, well, if it's that much trouble, we'll just take a cab.
20:59Hold it.
21:00Turn around.
21:01I ain't shot nobody in the back yet.
21:03Al, I'd advise you to drop that gun and for the rest of you to give yourselves up.
21:07You must be joking.
21:08I think not.
21:09Because at this very moment, this cabin is completely surrounded by two squads of control agents.
21:16You're bluffing.
21:17Nobody knows you're here.
21:19Oh, really?
21:20Well, we'll see about that.
21:23All right, Chief.
21:24Move in.
21:25Okay, Max.
21:27I'll write you men in there.
21:30The cabin is completely surrounded.
21:32Come out with your hands up.
21:33Come and get us, you dirty, lousy, rat-fing coppers.
21:40Hey, watch your language.
21:43That's the only language I know.
21:46Larry, let them have the tear gas.
21:50Right, Chief.
21:51Tear gas.
21:54Max, what did you do that for?
21:57Are you kidding, 99?
21:58There was a tear gas.
22:00That stuff is murder on your eyes.
22:03What's going on here?
22:04Oh, hi, Big Eddie.
22:05They threw in a tear gas bomb and I threw it out the door.
22:07You're smart.
22:09Max was smart.
22:10Boy, am I glad to see you.
22:13Are you coming out?
22:15We're outnumbered and surrounded.
22:16We have no choice but to surrender.
22:17He's right, Big Debbie.
22:18To shoot out with them would be suicide.
22:20All right, gentlemen.
22:21I see you.
22:22What did you do that for?
22:23What did you do that for?
22:24Are you kidding, 99?
22:25There was a tear gas bomb?
22:26That stuff is murder on your eyes.
22:27What's going on here?
22:28Oh, hi, Big Eddie.
22:29Gentlemen, I suggest that you drop your guns.
22:34Okay, boys.
22:35Drop your guns.
22:43Al.
22:45Al?
22:46You got me.
22:47I didn't get you.
22:48Cortez's gun got you.
22:50No, no, it was your gun.
22:52My gun got you.
22:54Big Eddie's gun got me.
22:56No, no.
22:57No.
22:58My gun didn't get you, Cortez.
23:00My gun got one-way Al's.
23:02I saw the whole thing.
23:03Big Eddie's gun got Al, and Al's gun got you.
23:06That's the way I saw it.
23:08No.
23:09The way I saw it, I got hit when...
23:12Why are you guys so stubborn?
23:1499 saw the whole thing.
23:15I saw the whole thing.
23:16What do I have to do to convince you?
23:18Now, here's what happened.
23:19Big Eddie's gun went off.
23:2499, they're not listening to me.
23:26Oh, my God.
23:29No.
23:31No, that's why, at the этом stage...
23:36No.
23:37Whatever you got.
23:39No.
23:40No.
23:41Anything we got to do was you transhuman roar.
23:43¶¶
24:13¶¶
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