- 6 months ago
During a race through the magical land of Oz, Phink bargains with the wicked Space Witch of the West.
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00:00It's travel blasting in from deep space, racing from distant galaxies, it's Space Race!
00:30Space Race!
01:00Beryling in through uncharted galaxies, burning the space lanes at supercharged speeds, buckle your belts and tune in tight.
01:09It's the action-packed, peril-filled 3D excitement of the one, the only, Space Race.
01:17In our never-ending attempt to bring you far-out entertainment, today we travel really far out.
01:24700 light-years away to the border of the Milky Way, where...
01:28Oh my goodness, we seem to be losing contact. Stand by your tele-projectors.
01:35Come in, Space Racers, come in!
01:38We interrupt this space cast to warn our rockets, hurbling through Galaxy XL7 of dangerous Space Twisters. Return to your bases immediately.
01:49Space Twisters in Galaxy XL7? Holy cyclones! That's where our Space Racers are!
01:56Come in, Space Racers! Can you read me?
02:06There they are now!
02:08Say! We must be on the Planet Oz!
02:11Planet Oz? Like, how do you know?
02:14Easy! I read the script!
02:16That's right, Spacearoos! Today's race is over the galactic rainbow to the strange and danger-filled planet Oz!
02:27Your course, should you decide to accept, weaves across the yellow brick spaceway from the Munchkin Village through the Forbidden Space Forest,
02:35over the Mystic Mountains, and on to Emerald City!
02:40Oh yeah? Well, what if they don't accept?
02:43Then, your fate will be left to...
02:46the Wicked Space Witch of the West!
02:49Ah! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
02:51I accept! I accept!
02:53That's the thinking, Scare Bear!
02:55While you're at it, let's get out of here!
02:58Blast off!
03:02As usual, our Space Race winner will receive a super groovy, keno, neato, swell boss prize!
03:10In fact, it's a good one!
03:11A computer date picked just for you by Cupus, the Delta Dream computer with the galaxy guy or gal of your dreams!
03:19Of your dreams!
03:20Wow!
03:21First in the lead are Jabberjaw and Buford!
03:24The galloping Ghost Rocket is second by a nose!
03:27Nugget's nose!
03:29You're going to move it down!
03:32And while you're at it, giddyup!
03:34Huck and Quackup are in third!
03:36And Yogi and Scare Bear are in fourth!
03:39That great guardian of goodness, your favorite superhero and mine, Captain Good, is back in fourth place!
03:46Uh, make that way back!
03:49Uh, uh, uh, uh, back at the starting line!
03:52I wonder if he's having some problems with his 37-cylinder supercharged, fuel-injected, all-American, non-polluting good guy engine!
03:59Of course I'm not! She's running like a kitten!
04:07Hmm, now if I could only get her running like a spaceship, I'd be okay!
04:12Nothing personal, clean cat!
04:14Rawr! One cat around here is enough!
04:17Rawr!
04:22Thanks! I mean it, Bat!
04:24Little do they know that that cutie pie, Captain Good, is really me, Phantom Fink!
04:30And his clean cat, clean cat, is really me, Sludge, Sludge!
04:35Stop hamming, doggie! One sludge is enough! In fact, it's one too many!
04:41Do you hear something coming from the engine?
04:45Yeah!
04:46Yeah!
04:47Well, what is it?
04:48Vroom vroom vroom!
04:58Head across the ominous skies of Oz, Jabberjaw still has a respectable lead!
05:03Did I hear what I thought I heard?
05:05Oh, at last, a little respect.
05:10The rest of the order is unchanged.
05:14Oh, no, it's that mysterious master of muck.
05:19Cold-hearted conniver that I am,
05:22it's time for some quick calculations with a big payout.
05:26Oh, let me help.
05:27Seven and three quarters enters compounded daily,
05:30held two quarters, and cool it, Smudge!
05:34I mean, pinky calculations!
05:37After we hit the forest,
05:39we rendezvous with the...
05:43wicked space witch of the West.
05:47Meanwhile, the other racers leave the safe skies of Munchkin Village
05:51to the deep, dark dangers of the...
05:54Forbidden Space Forest.
05:56You know, Quactor, I think he knows something weird.
05:59I know something way down.
06:00It's sure something, huh, sure.
06:02It's still the lions and tigers and bears.
06:04Oh, my.
06:06The bears don't bother me.
06:08It's the lions and tigers I'm not so crazy about.
06:12I'm scared of them all.
06:13Even the, oh, my.
06:15Oh, they're awful.
06:17Whoa.
06:18And while our racers pilot their star cruisers ahead,
06:22let's take time out for...
06:25That's right, Spacecateers.
06:27You guessed it.
06:28Another award-winning space race biography.
06:31Oh, boy.
06:32This week, that cohort of the Phantom Fink, Sludge.
06:36Like all our space racers,
06:38Sludge is a contestant of superior intelligence.
06:41While the other dogs in his class were still learning English,
06:46Sludge was already studying a foreign language.
06:49Woof, woof.
06:50Bow, wow.
06:52Ha, ha, hee, hee, ho, ho.
06:57Sludge was a whiz in obedience school
07:00and could do all the tricks.
07:02Sit.
07:03Woof.
07:04Fetch.
07:05Shake.
07:11When the Fink showed up at the Space Pound looking for a dog,
07:14it was a match made in heaven.
07:17Any dog this bad can't be all bad.
07:22I hope.
07:25Yuck.
07:26There you have him.
07:27And now, back to the race.
07:30While our brave racers innocently raced
07:32above the Forbidden Space Forest,
07:34little did they know
07:35that foul Finkery was underway below.
07:38Ms. Witch,
07:39permit me to introduce myself.
07:41I am Phantom Fink.
07:43Ta-ta.
07:44Let me get to the point, Witchy.
07:46I'm on my way to Emerald City
07:48to the interplanetary convention
07:50of Finks, finaglers, and miscellaneous bad guys.
07:54Ooh, how impressive.
07:57Why, it's really nothing.
08:00Unfortunately, however,
08:02the space lanes are clogged with traffic.
08:05It seems this group of galactic goonie birds
08:08is having some sort of space race here.
08:11If only you could get them out of my hair,
08:13I'd be forever indebted to you, Witchy.
08:16He could try a dental shampoo.
08:19Of course I can.
08:24But first, you must do something for me.
08:28Anything, your witchness.
08:30Anything.
08:31Where's your malice sludge bag?
08:34Bring me the ruby glasses of the one they call Rita.
08:40Why doesn't she get some contact lenses?
08:45They come in colors.
08:46Ruby glasses?
08:47No problem, Witchy.
08:49An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.
08:57After I get the ruby glasses,
09:00the first prize computer date with the galaxy dream girl
09:03is mine.
09:05Oh, can I get a date too, please?
09:07Please?
09:08We could double.
09:09It'd be so much fun.
09:10Who'd want a date with you, sludge?
09:12You're a dog.
09:13Well, you ain't so cute yourself.
09:16Ha.
09:17Oh, I hate his beard.
09:18Now to find those dingbat sisters
09:20and the huckily me cowboy.
09:24With such terrible treachery afoot,
09:26thank goodness he doesn't know
09:27they're headed towards Disco-Uz.
09:30Thanks for the tip, sucker.
09:32It works every time.
09:36On to Disco-Uz, sludge.
09:38And while you're at it,
09:39shing-a-ling-a-boo-boo-doo-boo-day.
09:45Disco-tech.
09:46Fink-o-tech.
09:48Push the fake change button, sludgy.
09:56What luck.
09:57Two flasks and we're stuck in a space station.
10:00Captain Good.
10:02In person.
10:03At your service.
10:05What luck.
10:06Two flasks and we're stuck at a space station.
10:09Hmm.
10:10They look okay to me.
10:12I mean, oh yes, I see.
10:14But let me help.
10:15With my Captain Good galaxy gizmo,
10:18I'll have those tires filled in no time, gals.
10:21Even less.
10:28Wow.
10:30Joe.
10:31You know that coin ball captain really steaming me up.
10:37Sticks and stones may break my bones.
10:39Twa-la-dee-dee-da-dum-dee-do.
10:41That was your cue, feline friend.
10:44Brrr.
10:45What a life.
10:49Cool it with the milk, you wiener whistle.
10:52What do you think I am, a kitty?
10:58If we can only catch up to those nut-cake sisters
11:01and knit those ruby glasses.
11:04Huh.
11:05That's easy.
11:11Sludgy!
11:12I can't believe it!
11:13Where did you learn such a trick?
11:15I saw it in a Dino-Mutt cartoon.
11:18He's so cute, I love the way it stretches and stuff.
11:21Oh no!
11:22With the ruby glasses in hand
11:24and the wicked Space Witch in his pocket,
11:26who knows what evil the Fink is capable of!
11:30Space Witch in his pocket.
11:32Let me see.
11:34Stop mumbling, Sludge, and give a cheer!
11:36The first prize computer date is now a cinch!
11:40Hip hip hooray!
11:42What about me?
11:44Forget it, Sludge!
11:45I told you before, no dates for dogs!
11:49Then I'll go to a singles club and pick up a poodle.
11:52Tales of Terror!
11:53Will the Phantom Pink truly go on to victory
11:56and claim the knockout first prize?
11:58Will the Wicked Witch of the West claim the ruby glasses
12:01and become princess of all evil?
12:07Or will Rita get them back and see straight once again?
12:11I hope so, they cost me $3.98.
12:14All this and much, much more as we return to Planet Oz
12:19for the electrifying and danger-filled second half
12:22of today's Space Race!
12:26As in your seat belts and hold on tight,
12:29it's time for the super-duper blow-your-mind all-star second half
12:34of the one and only Space Race!
12:37Today's race is on the mysterious and danger-filled planet of ours!
12:43A strange land over the rainbow
12:46where our racers were abruptly jettisoned
12:48by a violent space twister!
12:50When we last left our evil astronauts,
12:52they were innocently soaring towards Emerald City
12:55at the finish line!
12:57Little do they know that just one light year back,
13:01evil, was in the air!
13:03Oh, I don't see nothing.
13:05Maybe a little smog?
13:07The Phantom Fink and Sludge,
13:09those malicious masters of muck,
13:11had stolen Rita's ruby glasses
13:13as an offering for the Wicked Space Witch of the West!
13:16Through the space-age magic of Astrovision,
13:19we take you live and direct
13:21to the Wicked Witch's space castle
13:23where Phantom Fink and Sludge have just arrived!
13:27It's only witchcraft!
13:30Your exalted wickedness!
13:32I was singing!
13:33Here are your ruby glasses you wanted!
13:36Now rid the skies of those intergalactic boobs!
13:39I beg of you!
13:40Oh, I beg you also of Wickedness!
13:42Me too, please beg I will!
13:44All in due time, my friends!
13:47All in due time!
13:49What's with a dim-wist dog?
13:51I think he was bit by a space flea!
13:54Enough idle chatter!
13:56Give me the ruby glasses!
13:59Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
14:01Clop!
14:02All power is mine!
14:04You have done well,
14:06my thinky friends,
14:08and you shall be rewarded!
14:10Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
14:13Whatever happened to the great guardian of goodness
14:16and his faithful feline friend,
14:18Captain Good and Clean Cat?
14:21That's you two I'm talking about!
14:23Why, yes! Of course!
14:24No harm, no foul!
14:26No name coming either!
14:28Great, Captain!
14:29Is it possible for you to get back in the race
14:31and regain your lead?
14:32Of course it is, Noodledrip!
14:35Boo on you!
14:36But first, close your eyes and count to five!
14:39Uh, whatever you say!
14:41Quick, little kit!
14:42Do your bit!
14:43Ha-ha! Checkle, checkle!
14:45Good rhyme there, Captain Good!
14:47Good?
14:48Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
14:57Five!
14:58Okay, Captain Good, opening my eyes now...
14:59Where did he go?
15:01Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
15:04They might have gotten away from that king bat witch,
15:07but wait till they meet mean Dr. Nacho!
15:11The space wrestler!
15:12He-he-he-he-he-he!
15:14He's so mean...
15:15Oh, he really is mean. I've seen him on TV.
15:18He comes on right after roller derby,
15:20usually when I'm going out to get a little bow.
15:26First, for a quick disguise
15:28so I can send those bird brains on a dirty detour
15:32to the wrestling arena.
15:35What this ship needs is a racing stripe.
15:39Oh, yeah, yeah.
15:40And how about some dice to hang on the rearview mirror?
15:43They'll be groovy.
15:44Dice?
15:46Forget it, sludgy.
15:47No gambling allowed on Saturday morning TV.
15:50Don't you know that?
15:51Duck, doggy, here they come.
15:53Out to sit, sludge, and I'll do the talking.
15:58Hey there, weary space travelers.
16:01Tired of the hustle and bustle on planet Earth?
16:03Sick of crowded spaceways?
16:05Well, at last your day has come.
16:08You can find peace once again in beautiful...
16:10Yes, I said beautiful Pluto Springs
16:13on a starnold asteroid here for beautiful Pluto Springs.
16:16You'll resort home away from home, complete with...
16:19Listen to this.
16:20Eighteen Crater Championship Golf Course,
16:23Olympic-sized sunabath, and big, beautiful beaches.
16:28Now for your free introductory visit to Pluto Springs,
16:32take the Milky Highway to the Galaxy Turnoff.
16:34Go left when you reach the broken asteroid belt,
16:36and go straight to Pluto Springs.
16:39It's marked wrestling area.
16:42I never heard tell of Pluto Springs before,
16:45but it seems like a place worth looking into.
16:47Here, quack-up.
16:51As, uh, smarter than the average bear, myself,
16:54it don't look too bad.
16:59We did it, sludge.
17:02And remember, friends, for our first 50 home viewers
17:13to visit Pluto Springs, we're gonna throw in
17:16this rare collector's album of 50 golden galaxy hits.
17:20Gee, I wonder if he's got it in 8-track.
17:23We could listen to it here in the rocket ship.
17:25Yeah.
17:26Wow, I've done it for sure.
17:31The computer date with the galaxy dream girl
17:33will be mine for sure.
17:36Oh, please let me come.
17:37I won't make any trouble.
17:39Please, oh, please, please, please, I'll be quiet.
17:41For the last time, sludgy, no!
17:43You've got no savoir faire.
17:46Savoir what?
17:47You just can't teach an old dog new tricks.
17:51Oh, yeah.
17:56In the center ring, the meanest man in Oz,
18:03the terror of the galaxy's, Mean Doctor Macho!
18:08This ain't no Pluto Springs.
18:13This is a ration arena, and that's Mean Doctor Macho,
18:17the masked muscle man.
18:19Dr. Macho, he's such a brute.
18:24Sure, my Doctor Macho.
18:26And I'll show you one scared bear.
18:28You make that two scared bears.
18:31Heavens to martial arts.
18:33That muscle-bound Dr. Macho is chasing our brave racers
18:37around that tiny ring.
18:39Don't forget, tricked by foul pink double-cross.
18:42Thank you, Nuggie.
18:44Tricked by a foul pink double-cross,
18:46they were led to the space arena while looking for Pluto Springs.
18:49I can hardly imagine what our innocent friends will look like
18:52when all that smoke clears.
18:55Hmm, that was quick.
18:57Muscles or no muscles, that'll be the day when an ordinary spaceman
19:01can out-wrestle ol' Nugget Nose.
19:04I used to take on a herd of buffalo just for exercise.
19:08Now for a quick facelift.
19:10Doggies!
19:11With a face like that, no wonder he's wearing a mask.
19:16He-he-he!
19:17After their unfortunate stay in Pluto Springs,
19:22the racers are back in the skies again.
19:24They're nearing the finish line and Emerald City,
19:27but is it possible to catch the fink?
19:29He's all ahead, but what he doesn't know is that a special race committee
19:33has disqualified him for finagling above and beyond the call of finkery.
19:39Ha-ha! Thanks for telling me!
19:42No problem for the fink!
19:44No problem for the fink!
19:45No problem for the fink!
19:46No problem for the fink!
19:47What excitement down at the finish line!
19:48All of Emerald City has turned out!
19:49Look who it is!
19:50Spectacle of spectacles!
19:51It's Captain Good, and he's coming across first!
19:52Ta-da!
19:53Captain Good wins today's space race!
19:55And the crowd's going wild!
20:10Why, of course they are, Granola Face!
20:12They love their captain!
20:14But don't forget when the super spectacular space race returns
20:18on another distant planet!
20:21Hold it! Hold it!
20:23Hold it! Hold it!
20:25There's Captain Good being introduced to his prize!
20:28The galaxy dream date chosen for him specially by Koopa,
20:32our space race computer!
20:37For your dream date, Koopa has chosen for you
20:42One of the most special women in the galaxy!
20:47She is custom made to be your perfect match!
20:51Ooh! Perfect!
20:53Ooh!
20:54Ah!
20:55Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
20:57Hello, cupcake!
20:58A perfect match!
21:02Hmm!
21:03I think there's been a terrible mistake!
21:06You know, Clean Cat,
21:07they just don't build witches the way they used to!
21:10Oh!
21:11Come back, Captain Good!
21:13Come back!
21:14No way!
21:16Ah!
21:22Uh-huh!
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