- 5/6/2025
Winners: Captain Good and Clean Kat.
Prize: A car/ship that converts into a bag for easy keeping. Trouble: The car/ship did it with Captain Good inside it.
Prize: A car/ship that converts into a bag for easy keeping. Trouble: The car/ship did it with Captain Good inside it.
Category
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TVTranscript
00:00Stratoblasting in from deep space, racing from distant galaxies, it's Space Race!
00:30Right on!
00:56From the Marathon of Ancient Greece to the Grand Prix of Monaco,
01:05racers with nerves of steel have fought for victory.
01:08Now comes the greatest test of all, the Space Race.
01:13Today's race is a 9,000-mile circle around the watery planet of Neptune.
01:20Never before has such a perilous race been attempted.
01:23Violent seas and bizarre undersea creatures
01:27underscore the many dangers ahead of our brave racers.
01:32Throughout the world, spectators are watching the race via satellite in their homes.
01:38On launcher number one are Yogi Bear and Scare Bear.
01:42Ah, smarter than average bear.
01:45On launcher number two are Huckleberry Hound and Quacker.
01:50Yes, sir, I'm gonna win this race.
01:52Yes, sir, I'm gonna win, I'm gonna win.
01:55In position number three is the Galloping Ghost,
02:03piloted by Wendy, Rita, and Nugget Nose.
02:07Ha, ha, ha.
02:08The Wendy, the Rita, c'est très beautiful.
02:11C'est très charmant.
02:12C'est très magnifique.
02:14What's the worst, cracks, you French fried fricoses?
02:17Yeah!
02:18Yeah!
02:19Hoo-hee!
02:21Ready in launch position number four are Jabberjaws and Buford.
02:27The man said launch position.
02:36Ooh!
02:37Some launch position.
02:39No respect.
02:40That's all I get.
02:41While in position number five is that guardian of goodness, Captain Good and Clean Cat.
02:48Oh, isn't Captain Good's hair gorgeous?
02:51Oh, yeah?
02:52I'll take the curl out of his hair.
02:55Captain Good must also be Captain Beautiful.
02:58The winner of today's race will receive the dream prize of a lifetime.
03:12The sleek new Stingbird.
03:14A modern sports car for today's modern space traveler.
03:18Besides the latest innovations in high-speed technology,
03:21the Stingbird features total portability.
03:24The race will follow an intricate course circling the entire planet of Neptune.
03:35Knowing the awesome space creatures that inhabit these bizarre Neptutian seas,
03:40one can't help but admire the raw courage of our brave racers.
03:45Ah!
03:47And down on the launch pad, Blast Off is just seconds away.
03:51Three, three, two, one, Blast Off!
03:54And there they go!
03:56First to move into the lead are Huckleberry Hound and Cracker.
03:59Ah, so bad.
04:00It takes to space like a duck to water.
04:02Wait, wait, duck to water.
04:03That's me, you sure.
04:05That's me, you sure.
04:05That's me, you sure, you sure.
04:07Just behind them are Jabberjaws and Buford.
04:10Oh!
04:11Okay, okay.
04:12Stop with the Splash Splash.
04:14Oh, no respect.
04:16That's what I get.
04:17No respect.
04:18Tied for third place are Yogi and Scare Bear and Wendy, Rita and Nugget Nose.
04:24Not for long.
04:26This rocket is equipped with the latest in auxiliary power.
04:29Yeah, we'll show them our bear dust.
04:32Here goes.
04:33Power on!
04:35Rob, I'm scared of high places.
04:39How about that?
04:40A scared bear with acrophobia.
04:42Or is it hydrophobia?
04:44Help!
04:47Be piercing us, Wendy.
04:49Why don't you come up with one of your silly ideas now?
04:52Who cares about that?
04:54Look what this salty atmosphere is doing to my hair.
04:57Oh, I just hope Captain Good doesn't see me like this.
05:00But back in fifth place, Captain Good is having problems of his own.
05:05That great guardian of goodness seems to be caught in an obtusian whirlpool.
05:11Fear not.
05:13There's no feat too neat for Captain Good to meet.
05:17And beat!
05:18Right, Greencast?
05:19Or for the Phantom Fink to cheat, eh, Sludge?
05:29Ha, ha, ha, hee, hee, ho, ha, ha, ha.
05:32Eh, little do they know that Captain Good is really me, the Phantom Fink.
05:38All right, Sludge, turn on the Fink fan, and we'll blow those Bad News Bears back to the Big Dipper.
05:50Ha, ha, right, Fink, ho, hee, hee, right, ha, ha, ha, ha, good finkin', Fink, ho.
05:56Knock it off, Sludge, before I make you dog-pedal home.
06:00Now push the button.
06:02Oh, hi there, Yogi.
06:07Fink's more dead of hair.
06:10Relax, Scare Bear.
06:11Don't think about the Fink.
06:13He's full of hot air.
06:16How about that?
06:17Fink's smog.
06:18How dirty can you get?
06:20Still in first place, a Huckleberry Hound and Pack-Up.
06:23Wait a minute.
06:24It's the Phantom Fink and Sludge coming out of nowhere to take the lead.
06:29You'd better have a lead with Loudmouth.
06:31After I talk to my friends, the Neptune-no-goodniks, that Hound and his quack-a-pal will be nothing more than duck soup.
06:39Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, quack, quack, ha, ha.
06:42Huh, I wonder what he meant by that.
06:44Here is an urgent message.
06:46A flash asteroid shower is forecast for planet Neptune.
06:50All space travelers on the high seas are urged to take extreme caution.
06:55No problem.
06:56According to the ship's compass, we passed the asteroid area 20 minutes ago.
07:01Wait, wait, excuse me, sir, Captain Hook, sir.
07:04But I think the ship's compass has gone crazy, sir.
07:07We've had no readings, sir.
07:09Uh-oh.
07:09You know what that means.
07:11One asteroid shower coming up.
07:13While Phantom Fink races ahead for an evil rendezvous with the dangerous Neptutian-no-goodniks,
07:26Wendy, Rita, and Nuggetnose are still struggling in last place.
07:30General stations, ahoy!
07:32Goldberg, get ahead!
07:35Goldberg?
07:36What's a Goldberg?
07:37It's an iceberg made of gold!
07:40Ice-rich!
07:41Yee-haw!
07:44Whoever saw an iceberg shaped like an egg?
07:47Not me.
07:50Yuck-y!
07:53Nugget, you're pulling us off court!
07:56Wonderful!
07:57Now we'll never win one of those sting birds.
08:00One?
08:00Why, when I catch this nugget in, I'll buy you 50 of them wagons.
08:05Yuck-y!
08:08Yuck-y!
08:08Yuck-y!
08:09Yuck-y!
08:10Yuck-y!
08:10Yuck-y!
08:12On second thought, one of them sting birds is plenty.
08:16Yuck-y!
08:16Yuck-y!
08:17Yuck-y!
08:18Yuck-y!
08:18Yuck-y!
08:19Yuck-y!
08:19Yuck-y!
08:21Neptune Village, home of the Neptutian-no-goodniks, the hungriest creatures in the galaxy.
08:28Come on, sludge, let's go to the booze coming for dinner!
08:31And as our races speed on, little do they know that the evil phantom fink plans to have
08:39them served as a knick-knack snack for those hungry no-goodniks.
08:44Scare Bear, I'm afraid we need more speed!
08:46Who's afraid?
08:47I'll pour it on!
08:48I'll pour it on!
08:49Is our big-mouthed friend still with us?
08:51Big mouth and big tooth, too!
08:56Do something, Nugget-nose!
08:58Shoo!
08:59Shoo!
09:00Shoo!
09:01Shoo!
09:02Oh, great!
09:03That'll do it!
09:04Hello, no-goodniks!
09:06I realize you're hungry, so I'll be brief!
09:13I'll be brief.
09:20Bon appetit.
09:22Scram, Sludge, or we'll be the dissent.
09:27Help!
09:28Help!
09:30Yeah, what's happening?
09:32No, no respect, no respect.
09:35I feel dry.
09:36Rita, we're all being sucked into that giant oyster shell.
09:40Like I've heard of pit stops before.
09:42Yeah, but this is the pit.
09:45I wonder if we can get a pearl necklace from this place.
09:49I am necklace, chef of the No-Good Mix.
09:53Chef? Hey, sounds like my kind of guy.
09:56Dinner will be served in ten minutes.
09:59Like, uh, what's on the menu, chief of chefs?
10:03You!
10:05Sheet, I like seafood, but not when it's me.
10:08I don't taste good boil, or barbecue, or fig of seed, if you must know.
10:14Do something, Huck.
10:16I don't speak No-Good-Nick No-Good.
10:18Oh, let us out of here, you No-Good-Nicks.
10:22Oh, no!
10:24Will our razors become part of an O-Good-Nick stew?
10:27Will that evil phantom fink race on to victory?
10:30You bet I will!
10:33Ah-ha!
10:34Perhaps most baffling of all is the mysterious disappearance of Captain Good,
10:40the only man capable of foiling this evil fink fowl.
10:44Return with us when we unravel these mysteries
10:47in the exciting conclusion of today's space race
10:49in the watering terrors of Neptune.
10:51Listen to your seatbelts and prepare for liftoff.
10:55It's the electrifying finale of today's space race!
11:00When we left our courageous contestants,
11:03they had been captured by the hungriest creatures in the galaxy,
11:06the No-Good-Nicks of Planet Neptune.
11:12Victims of a sinister deal made by that sneaky phantom fink.
11:17While the fink raced ahead in the lead,
11:19the others were being lowered into a fiery kettle of No-Good-Nicks stew.
11:24Yogi and Scarebear, Huck and Quackup,
11:27Jabberjaws and Buford,
11:29and Wendy, Rita and Nuggetnose.
11:31Helpless entrees all on a malicious No-Good-Nick menu.
11:37While the only man capable of saving them, Captain Good,
11:40had mysteriously disappeared prior to their capture.
11:44If only Captain Good was here,
11:46he'd get us out of this stew.
11:48Oh, that tenderfoot couldn't even get himself
11:51out of the beauty parlor.
11:53Them thy girls sure know how to make a feller mad.
11:56Why, with my galactic jack-and-buffalo winch,
11:59I'll have us out of here faster
12:01than you say Pike's Peak.
12:04There ain't been a No-Good-Nick yet
12:06who could lick old Nuggetnose.
12:08All right, let's away!
12:10Oh, Nugget, you're a huggy!
12:13Never mind the respect, let's get out of here!
12:16Once again, the courage and cunning of Nuggetnose
12:21saves our racers from becoming a Naptution snack.
12:26Don't forget, the winner of today's race
12:28will win this super-deluxe space-age sports car,
12:31the Stingbird.
12:32It's really loaded with extras.
12:34Here to demonstrate just a few
12:36is Spinocchi County's own Deputy Goofer.
12:40Among the features our winner will enjoy are
12:43power steering, power brakes, automatic driving,
12:46and, hmm, I wonder what this little button does.
12:53Now I know what it does!
12:55As the racers press on to catch Phantom Fink,
13:00they enter the infamous southern hemisphere of Neptune,
13:03hunting grounds of the most dreaded creature of the galaxy,
13:07the awesome Cyclops Whale!
13:11They might have outsmarted those nitwit No-Good-Nicks,
13:14but wait till they come eye-to-eye
13:15with the one-eyed Cyclops Whale!
13:18Hmm, eh, Sludge?
13:23Sludge?
13:24I'll dry up!
13:32But first, Sludge,
13:34it's time for a little
13:35fingerflage and a devious detour!
13:41That'll ever send him off course
13:42for a while, eh, Sludgy?
13:49Keep it up,
13:50Sludge, and I'll flick your sneaker!
13:54Hold on, it's a ramp.
13:57Oh, great, just what I need.
14:02Yahoo!
14:04Hey, all bears, prepare for takeoff.
14:11Nick!
14:12A ski jump.
14:13How about a little extra help, Buford?
14:15Knock it off, sluts.
14:25Meanwhile, our racers push forward through a savage Neptutian storm
14:30where the superior navigational techniques of the Yogi Rocket
14:34and the Jabba Jaws one brings them into a battle for the lead.
14:38Like steady as she blows, Scare Bear.
14:41Any words for the skipper?
14:44Yes, indeed.
14:45Help!
14:48Like he's a bear of few words, but they really fit.
14:52I always say three's a crowd, so I'll add a Yogi Cloud.
15:05Navigation's easy when your co-pilot carries his own sonar, eh, Buford?
15:09And while our racers battle the elements on Neptune's surface,
15:18little do they know the unspeakable dangers awaiting them from underneath.
15:23All right, Sludge, it's time to stop being nice.
15:31Knock it off, Sludge!
15:33After a trip over Neptagra Falls, we'll introduce our friends to the Cyclops Whale.
15:39If there's anything left of them, that is.
15:47If to what that storm did to my nerves, I sure hope we don't run into the Cyclops Whale.
15:54Who cares about the Whale?
15:56After what the storm did to my hair, I sure hope we don't run into Captain Good.
16:01Oh, no!
16:03It's those nut cake girls and that cockamamie cowboy.
16:06It's time for Fink to pull a little Finkery.
16:14Come, clean cat.
16:16There's goodness to be gab.
16:20Don't look now, but here comes Mr. Dreamboat himself.
16:26Dreamboat looks more like a shipwreck to me.
16:30Never too busy to look nifty.
16:36You haven't seen the Cyclops Whale, have you, Captain Good?
16:40No, but I'll keep an eye out for them.
16:43Get it, clean cat, an eye.
16:49The racers are approaching the Neptagra Falls
16:52and no doubt will need all their skills and expertise
16:55to negotiate the murderous 12,000-foot descent.
16:59Oh, no, a fog layer has suddenly settled right over the top of the falls.
17:04If the racers can't see when to decelerate,
17:06they'll be smashed to space dust on the coral below.
17:09Just as I expected.
17:11The Phantom Fog is another foul finagle by the Phantom Fink.
17:15Naturally, for my Fink Fog will fall up their fall.
17:25Fear not!
17:26I, Captain Good, shall sacrifice my lead
17:29to alert my worthy competitors.
17:31Neptagra Falls ahead, men.
17:33Imagine seeing Neptagra Falls with Captain Good.
17:37Oh, how romantic.
17:39I'll say.
17:40I could sure fall for him.
17:43I told you to keep your eye on the wheel.
17:45Now we'll be smashed.
17:47Smash nothing?
17:48Ain't you girls ever heard of my Wild West lasso, Copter?
17:52Yahoo!
17:53How about that?
17:58It's Captain Good with a sign.
18:01Neptagra Falls ahead.
18:03How good of Captain Good!
18:07Falls, huh?
18:09No problem.
18:11Right, Buford?
18:15No respect!
18:16How about that?
18:21Neptagra Falls, and I'm out of gas.
18:26Fear not, Huckleberry, my little hound.
18:28According to the third law of geophysical astrodynamics,
18:31the square of the hypotenuse is directly proportional
18:34to the inverse angle of the negative microvelocity.
18:38I wonder what all that means.
18:40Yeah, what does it mean, sir?
18:41What does it mean, sir?
18:43It simply means, little hound,
18:45that when you're out of fuel,
18:46you drop like a concrete comet.
18:49Oh, well.
18:51Adios.
18:55Well, clean cat,
18:57on to a fair finish.
19:00With my Captain Good projection engine,
19:03we'll lower down soft as a feather.
19:05Watch, clean cat.
19:10Oh, darn.
19:12I forgot to turn it on.
19:15Why can't he just meow like other kitties?
19:20Heading into the final thousand kilometers,
19:23the galloping ghost rocket,
19:24with Wendy, Rita, and Nuggetnose in the lead.
19:27Followed by Yogi and Scarebear in second.
19:30Jabberjaws and Bugle in third.
19:32Huck and Quackup in fourth.
19:34And in fifth, it's heavens above.
19:37It's the phantom fink and sludge.
19:39I feel so much better in these dirty clothes.
19:44Now, if that Cyclops whale does his job right,
19:48he'll have a full stomach tonight,
19:50and we'll just waltz across the finish line.
19:54Put us down, you big Moby Dingbat.
19:57I'm not your dinner.
20:03Just kidding.
20:04Can't you take a little joke?
20:09I guess he can.
20:12Pandemonium rains
20:13as the rockets approach the finish line.
20:15It's gonna be close.
20:17It's the Yogi Rocket and the Galloping Ghost.
20:19It's the Galloping Ghost and Yogi.
20:21But where's the phantom fink?
20:24Inside a one-eyed whale.
20:26Where do you think?
20:27Bow, wow.
20:28I'm scared.
20:29I don't want to be an order for a one-eyed whale.
20:33Cool it, sludge,
20:34before I trade you in on a ferragate.
20:37Hang on for a tonsil takeoff.
20:43And at the finish, it's...
20:45Wait, it's...
20:47It's Captain Good and Clean Cat.
20:51And now, down to the winner's circle
20:58for today's prize.
21:00Thank you, good friends,
21:01for the good Stingbird.
21:03Let me just say,
21:04in the name of all goodness,
21:06I will continue the struggle
21:08for the forces of super excellence.
21:10Ad infinatum, summa command,
21:12and nauseam, el toro,
21:14and other Latin things.
21:21Green Cat, get me out of here.
21:29Green Cat, you're asking for it.
21:32Don't forget to tune in next week, space fans,
21:36as we return to the supercharged scintillations
21:39and high-speed drummers
21:41on Yogi's Space Race.
21:44Green Cat, get me out of here,
21:46or I'll give it to you good.
21:49Oh, my name isn't Captain Good.
21:51Understand?
21:52Green Cat, get me out of here,
21:58and I'll give it to you good.
22:01Yeah, I'll give it to you good.
22:18Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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