- 2 days ago
S01E06 >>> https://dai.ly/xafp4tu
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00:11Treasure each other. It's the most important relationship you'll ever have.
00:18Thanks.
00:20But don't sleep with your mother's friends.
00:45MUSIC
00:46Reservation under Izzy Asher.
00:49Does everyone get the door wrong?
00:52No. Oh, that's strange.
00:55I actually designed the shards, so, yeah, they really mess your doors up.
00:58I'm glad that none of your other patrons noticed that.
01:08I thought I was meeting Izzy.
01:10Me too.
01:17Is she parent-trapping us? It seems so.
01:19If only I had a butler and you had a winery.
01:23Don't understand.
01:25If we do break up, which child do you want? We both want Dom, don't we?
01:31I need a drink.
01:37This is ridiculous, isn't it?
01:39What are we doing? It's been weeks and we're not even trying to fix it.
01:42Don't you think I should just move back in?
01:46I don't even understand what we're arguing about, do you?
01:50We're arguing about the fact that you lie to me and that you don't prioritize our relationship.
01:56OK.
01:58I'm not sure why I'm the one apologizing.
01:59I'm not the one who had a strange woman over to our house.
02:04There's no way you haven't lied to me once or twice.
02:07No, no, no.
02:07She's not a strange woman and I don't lie to you ever.
02:12Excuse me?
02:13I'm proud of the...
02:15Oh, you know, it's not a parent trap.
02:17Stephen Izzy are here.
02:19Oh, amazing.
02:20So, do they not have waiters at this restaurant?
02:25Hey.
02:26Hey.
02:27OK.
02:30So, um, sorry to have misled you both about dinner,
02:33but I think we all need to find a way to get along.
02:37Oh, right, sounds good. Well, let's do that then.
02:41Do we not worry about the fact that he's destroyed my marriage and my job?
02:44After you destroyed my job?
02:46After you had sex with my child.
02:49Adult... Adult child.
02:50I think, in the interest of moving forward,
02:54you and I really need to bury the hatchet.
02:57That's racist.
02:58Is it?
02:59Right.
02:59Well, you're using a Native American term,
03:01bury the hatchet, that's racist.
03:03I should know because I got fired for being a racist.
03:05OK, there I actually was a racist.
03:07Apparently, that's my thing.
03:08OK, stop.
03:10We're having a baby.
03:15Sorry.
03:16We need to...
03:20You're...
03:24I think, yeah, you should...
03:26You...
03:26Yeah.
03:26We're having a baby.
03:28And we just wanted to tell you two so that we could sort this
03:33and get back to normal.
03:37Excuse me, can anyone come and take our drinks order, please?
03:45Quite loud.
03:47I'll bring you the wine list.
03:49No, no, two bottles of red, thank you.
03:50I'm not drinking, thank you.
03:52Me neither.
03:53Solidarity.
03:53No.
03:55No.
03:56Two bottles, thank you.
04:03There.
04:04That's the news.
04:07Mum...
04:13Do you really want a baby?
04:16Yeah.
04:20Babies are...
04:23a lot of work.
04:28I...
04:29I...
04:30I need you to...
04:30I just...
04:31Can you just say that you're happy for me?
04:33Please?
04:34Can you just say it?
04:35I'm happy if you're happy.
04:42You don't have to be in a relationship just because you're having a baby.
04:45I love Steve.
04:47I love him.
04:47And I want to do this with him.
04:58Okay.
04:59Fine.
05:01Okay.
05:02Yes.
05:03Okay.
05:08Okay.
05:09Okay.
05:13And how are you feeling?
05:14Any sickness?
05:15Yeah, a bit.
05:17Uh, no.
05:18Not yet.
05:19Oh, well that's brilliant.
05:21So lucky not to feel sick.
05:28I just want you both to know that I will do everything and anything it takes to be the best
05:34father for this baby.
05:36And, uh, we already know that it's going to have the best granny.
05:52Oh, wow.
05:55Sweet.
05:56Be lovely to have another little one running around the house.
06:01Yeah.
06:02Gosh.
06:03It's happy.
06:06It's happy.
06:09A baby.
06:15Happy.
06:18Happy.
06:20Happy tears.
06:20Happy tears.
06:22Happy tears.
06:24I should probably go to the loo.
06:36Oh, please, for the love of God, please.
06:38Can you bring two bottles of red wine to my table?
06:41I'll pay you a hundred pounds.
06:43Two hundred.
06:46I know it's really quick, Daniel, but honestly, it feels like fate.
06:52Yeah, no, it's...
06:54It's lovely.
06:56Thanks, mate.
06:58Uh, we thought of calling it Lenny if it's a boy.
07:01It's cute.
07:02It's cute.
07:02And then, if it's a gal, we'll call it Shirley.
07:05I know what you're thinking.
07:07Shirley, you can't be serious.
07:12Maybe.
07:14Oh, God.
07:15Oh, God.
07:16Oh, God.
07:17Oh, God.
07:18Oh, God.
07:20Oh, God.
07:20Are you okay?
07:22Do you need help?
07:26Hello?
07:28It's too late.
07:32Oh, God, it's all too...
07:34It's too late.
07:37Mum?
07:40Mum?
07:40Are you okay?
07:43Yeah.
07:46You sure?
07:48Yeah.
07:50Oh, good.
07:52I know I'm young, but you were almost the same age when you had me.
07:59Yeah.
08:01I was.
08:04Yeah.
08:07And you always say having me was the best decision you ever made.
08:12It was...
08:15Quite...
08:16Hard.
08:19Sorry?
08:20Sorry, are you talking to me?
08:22No!
08:23No.
08:24Mum?
08:25What did you say?
08:26I...
08:27I said...
08:28It was...
08:29Hard!
08:34I can do hard.
08:38I wouldn't be here if you hadn't done it.
08:43I...
08:54I sort of hope it's a girl.
08:57And it would be like you and me.
08:59It's the universe.
09:10No, I'm not your mate, don't you?
09:14Sorry?
09:15I always thought you were harmless.
09:16I never found you as funny as Alice did, but...
09:18I liked that you made her happy.
09:22But I'm starting to think that there's a good chance that you're a selfish person, Steve, who doesn't care about
09:28anyone but themselves.
09:29And I'm kind of dreading the fact that I'm going to have to spend every Christmas with you until I
09:35die.
09:36Hey.
09:38Hey.
09:40Everything okay?
09:41Yeah.
09:42Great.
09:43Just planning Christmas.
09:44Yes.
09:48I think we'll stay in Steve's flat probably until the baby's at least one.
09:52We like the idea of attachment parenting.
09:55And I think we want home birth.
09:57I like the idea of having the baby in water.
09:59Did you have a natural birth, Mum?
10:01No, I had an epidural.
10:03Any excuse for some drugs, am I right?
10:05Not really.
10:06We tend to have big babies in our family.
10:09Oh, really?
10:10I had the full Spice Girl.
10:13When, um, two become one.
10:18When you rip all the way from, uh, the vagina to the anus.
10:25Hmm.
10:30Oh.
10:32I just remembered we have to pick up my, uh, parents from the airport.
10:36Oh.
10:37Look, you, your parents are here?
10:39Yeah.
10:40They're doing a tour of European railways.
10:42Mm.
10:43Do-do-do.
10:45Let's go.
10:53She's not ready for a baby.
10:57Maybe you should tell her how hard it was for you.
10:59Can't do that.
11:01She'd hate me forever.
11:03Oh, sorry.
11:04Sorry, darling, but having a baby so young was the worst decision I ever made.
11:08And for the first six weeks, I-I dreamt of nothing but dropping you off at a Russian orphanage and
11:13pretending I'd found you in the street.
11:15I-I couldn't go out.
11:17I-I felt no human connection to you whatsoever.
11:21And-and for years and years, no-one wanted to go out with me.
11:25What do you mean no-one wanted to go out with you?
11:26I wanted to go out with you.
11:28No-no-one else wanted to.
11:31Oh, that's why you chose me, because I was the only option.
11:34No!
11:34No.
11:35I make your life more fun.
11:37You make my life more manageable.
11:39And one isn't better than the other.
11:41And if you don't like it, then, you know, maybe you should, you know, just leave.
11:47I think I've already done that, haven't I?
11:52This isn't your bus stop.
11:54The bus to your mum's goes from the other side.
11:55Yeah, I'm not going to my mum's.
11:57I'll stay at my house.
11:59If you're-if you're leaving me, you should be the one to move out.
12:09What do you-what do you mean?
12:11She-she just didn't get on the plane?
12:13No, she cancelled her ticket last week.
12:15Why didn't you tell-you didn't think to tell me this, Dad?
12:19Is she-is she okay?
12:20Is there-is there something wrong with her?
12:22Apart from selfishness and a basic lack of interest in locomotives.
12:26Yeah, you know, they sat some Indian teller beside me on the aeroplane.
12:30I'd be surprised if I had COVID, Dad.
12:32Um, guess what?
12:33Izzy and I are having a baby.
12:36Isn't that lovely news?
12:38Who's Izzy?
12:40This is Izzy, remember?
12:43I'm Izzy.
12:44Remember from-from about three minutes ago?
12:47What do you mean you're having a baby?
12:49Uh, I'm pregnant.
12:51Yeah, we're really happy.
12:53What, with him?
12:54Yes.
12:55You got you pregnant?
12:57Yes, Dad.
12:58So, when's the big day?
13:03Uh, um...
13:04We're taking it one step at a time.
13:06Oh yeah, marriage first, and then the baby.
13:09Um, it's not 1950, Dad.
13:11People don't care about that kind of thing anymore.
13:13Oh, oh, right.
13:14So this one's gonna grow up knowing that it's a bastard, eh?
13:18A mistake.
13:21A happy accident.
13:23Oh, well, let's hope you have another one.
13:26We always regretted having only the one.
13:35You can see where I get my coolness from.
13:37Come on.
13:49Are you seriously trying to get to the house first?
13:51You're such a child, Alice.
14:00Oh!
14:09If you lock the door, I'm calling the police.
14:35I didn't want to sleep with you anyway!
15:20you're gonna be fine
15:23yeah
15:24i think we've probably been in a rut for ages but just didn't notice
15:29i'm proud of you dan
15:31you're taking control
15:34i am aren't i
15:40all i needed was the love you gave
15:44all i needed for another day
15:49and all i ever knew
15:52only you
16:09what happened to the printer
16:14it broke
16:25how'd the interview go
16:29couldn't print out my cv so i didn't go
16:34what are you doing
16:36i'm watching porn stars
16:38this woman she thought her teacup was worth nine thousand dollars
16:41turns out it's just a piece of crap
16:48shall we
16:49shall we go to yours
16:51yeah
16:52bye mom
17:25sorry
17:26sorry
17:29sorry
17:29can we
17:30stop for a second
17:32of course
17:33what's wrong
17:34i am
17:36i need to go home
17:38why what's happened
17:39i just can't be here
17:41what
17:44i am
17:45need to go home
17:54why
17:55stop
17:55talk to me
17:58dom what are you doing
18:02what the fuck was that
18:03what
18:06one minute
18:07one minute
18:07you're kissing me
18:07and the next you've bolted out the door
18:09are you okay
18:10i'm not leaving
18:12i just need to check on my mum
18:14everything's fucked
18:15okay
18:16my mum's drinking in the day
18:18my parents hate each other
18:20and my sister is having a baby with a 50 year old
18:23it feels like someone has pressed a button
18:25and the world is ending
18:27it's like in terminator in the playground
18:29and suddenly everyone's fucking faces are melting off like no one has a face
18:34it's all fucked
18:37sorry
18:39come on
18:41thank you
18:43tom remember you don't say those just words
18:45i like the bit about our faces melting off
19:02can we just like do nothing
19:07nothing
19:09can we just like do nothing at all
19:19sure
19:27that's great
19:28i guess the only one client's better than no one
19:30isabel asher
19:31yep
19:32holy shit
19:33we're about to see our baby
19:37that's baby's heartbeat
19:45just the one
19:47yep
19:47afraid so
19:49and do you want to find out the gender or no
19:51oh
19:52i'm not 12 weeks yet
19:54can you do that
19:55well you're closer to 16
19:58well
19:59no i've had my period between then and now
20:01that's probably just implantation bleeding
20:06could could the baby just be a fast grower
20:12no
20:14but lucky you for whistling right through to the second trimester
20:18you're into the easy stretch now
20:23so do we want to find out the sex then mummy and daddy
20:32yeah yes please
20:33you are having a baby girl
20:59i'm really sorry
21:02it's fine
21:07daniel's always been my dad
21:10yeah i know
21:12i know he is
21:14but
21:15if you do want to end this
21:16then
21:18yeah i
21:19i understand
21:22no i want this
21:26i'm scared that you won't want this
21:31i
21:32i want this
21:37okay great
21:48do you want me to come in with you or
21:52no i think i should probably do this by myself
21:56yeah
21:58okay good luck
22:11is he
22:16please don't go back to him
22:19i won't
22:44hey tiger
22:46it's nice to see you
22:50i'm pregnant
22:53say that again
22:54for me
22:55i'm pregnant
22:57it's yours
22:59and uh
23:00i'm gonna have it
23:07i'm gonna have it
23:30i'm gonna have it
23:31yeah
24:13I think we should get married.
24:15What?
24:17I want to marry you.
24:20I don't understand.
24:21I love you, Izzy.
24:23I really love you.
24:24And actually, I think you're the best person that I've ever met.
24:28And I would like to be a family with you.
24:30And eat spaghetti vongole and teach little Shirley how to swim.
24:35And I don't care that she's not biologically mine.
24:38In fact, maybe that's even better because she and I will be a chosen family.
24:43And I know I'm old, but I will love you so hard and so completely.
24:49And when I'm too old, you can put me in a home and marry someone younger.
24:54But I love you, and I would like to marry you.
25:07Would you like to marry me too?
25:12Yes.
25:16Okay, great.
25:19Great.
25:21Great.
25:49You've expressed explicitly you're content for matrimony.
25:57If student wants to pay, it will not rest the alimony.
26:05Hey, hey, marry me, Archie.
26:14Hey, hey, marry me, Archie.
26:21Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
26:30hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
26:31hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
26:31hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
26:31hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
26:31hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey
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