- 15 hours ago
مسلسل Home Improvement مترجم - Episode 3
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Oh
02:01There's a warning label right there.
02:03You shouldn't open these in broad daylight in Detroit.
02:07Could cause an explosion.
02:08What?
02:10Wow.
02:11Look at this warning label.
02:13Socks may strike husband.
02:15Unacceptably.
02:16You could put an eye out like that.
02:18Boys, help me clean this mess up.
02:20Second half's about ready to begin.
02:21Here, hurry up.
02:22Now listen, don't get too involved in that, Tim.
02:24We have to get ready to go soon.
02:25Go?
02:26Where are we going?
02:28Dinner.
02:28Tonight.
02:29Tonight, Chapierre?
02:30That can't be tonight.
02:32It most certainly is.
02:34Well, what about the big game?
02:35Well, what have you been watching all this time?
02:37This is the little game right before the big game.
02:41The big game's the Rams and the Lions.
02:43Why didn't you remind me about dinner?
02:44Now, don't pull that.
02:45I asked you yesterday if you had reconfirmed the reservations, and you said, uh-huh.
02:49And then I said, were they for 7 o'clock?
02:50And you said, uh-huh.
02:51And then I said, did you get the babysitter?
02:52And you said, uh-huh.
02:52So I guess that means you didn't get the babysitter, huh?
02:54Uh-uh.
02:57Unbelievable.
02:59I completely forgot.
03:01We can't get a babysitter at this late hour.
03:04This is a tremendous disappointment.
03:08Yeah, I'll bet it is.
03:09This was supposed to be our romantic night out.
03:13Hey, romance?
03:13I got it.
03:14Why don't you and I go upstairs, turn the lights down, sit in bed, bottle of wine, and
03:19we can watch the game up there.
03:22You're not getting out of this without anything short of pneumonia.
03:29Boy, it's funny you mention that.
03:31This morning, I horked up something nasty-looking.
03:36Shot right out of my lungs.
03:39Well, suck it back in.
03:41We're going to dinner.
03:46You don't listen to that guy, you doofus.
03:48You can when they look as handsome as your daddy.
03:51You're looking pretty good yourself, sweetheart.
03:58Put a lid on it.
04:00Who'd you get to babysit for us, Linda?
04:03No, she finds you boys a little active.
04:06Good.
04:07She smells.
04:10Did you get Allison?
04:11No, honey.
04:12She's busy, but she sends her love.
04:17Stop that.
04:18Sit, sit.
04:19Well, then who'd you get?
04:20Well, I found someone new.
04:22Back there.
04:24Go!
04:24Go!
04:25Go!
04:26Go!
04:26Go get the door!
04:29Please turn off the television.
04:33Mrs. Taylor?
04:35Yes.
04:35Sir, Larry Houdini, world's second greatest escape artist and magician extraordinaire.
04:42Hey, you're great.
04:43I saw you at Chris Johnson's birthday party.
04:46Oh, lovely little girl.
04:48Chris is a boy.
04:49Strange little boy.
04:55But tell me, where are the birthday balloons, funny party hats, the pony ride?
05:01Well, um, actually, no one here is having a birthday.
05:04Well, you told me on the phone it was a birthday.
05:07I know.
05:07I lied.
05:08I'm so sorry.
05:09I was desperate.
05:11My husband didn't get a babysitter, and I called everybody I knew, and everybody was busy,
05:14and couldn't you just please stay?
05:16Never.
05:17Never.
05:17Sir, Larry has performed prestidigitation before prime ministers, heads of state, two
05:25kings, and a cranky duke.
05:27And never once has he stooped to babysitting to make ends meet.
05:34Happy birthday to you.
05:37Happy birthday to you.
05:40Happy birthday.
05:42Your name's here.
05:44Happy birthday to you.
05:47Thank you so much.
05:48You don't know what this means to me.
05:49Well, boys, the performance is about to start, so would you please help Sir Larry in with
05:54his magical trunk?
05:56Uh, Jill, hold on a minute.
05:57What's going on here?
05:58Oh, I'm sorry.
05:59Um, Sir Larry, this is my husband, Tim.
06:02Tim, this is Sir Larry, the babysitter.
06:04How you doing?
06:04And magician extraordinaire.
06:06Yeah, I bet you are, Larry.
06:07Uh, Jill.
06:10Oh, you got a magician to babysit my boys?
06:14Perfect.
06:14Perfect.
06:15Sir Larry, uh, the number where we are at the restaurant is right here.
06:19Call us if you have any problems.
06:21Whoa!
06:22What happened, Brad?
06:22What happened?
06:24Blinds just recovered.
06:25A fumble.
06:26Yes.
06:26Okay.
06:27Goodbye, boys.
06:27Goodbye, Sir Larry.
06:29Let's go, Tim.
06:30We should stay and watch a trick.
06:32It's not gonna work, Tim.
06:33Let's go.
06:36Oh, a wallet.
06:38Lifted over there by the TV.
06:39I've got credit cards.
06:41Do ya?
06:43Oh, my medicine's up by the TV upstairs.
06:46You don't take medicine.
06:47Oh.
06:49I should take some.
06:50I'm feeling a horker coming on.
06:56This is so romantic.
06:58And you have to admit, it's a beautiful place.
07:01A beautiful place for a beautiful woman.
07:04Oh, thank you, sweetie.
07:06I really, really do appreciate this.
07:09I know it was hard for you to leave that game.
07:11Game?
07:11What game?
07:14Excuse me, sir.
07:15Can you tell me where the ladies' room is?
07:16Down the hall to the left.
07:18I'll be right back.
07:19I'll be right here, Jill.
07:21Right here.
07:24I'll be right here.
07:30Could you give me a hand with this thing?
07:31Is that a radio?
07:33Yeah.
07:34You got the game on?
07:34I got the game on.
07:38I'm gonna get that second quarter before she gets back from the bathroom.
07:41Oh, man, this is absolutely brilliant.
07:43Thanks, buddy.
07:48So, what's happening?
07:49Hold on a minute.
07:52Here we go.
07:52Yes!
07:53What?
07:53What?
07:53What?
07:54I don't know, some kind of interception.
07:55They're inside the six, first and goal.
07:56All right!
07:57What's the score?
07:58Hold on, hold on, hold on.
07:59Riley's in motion.
08:00Uh-huh.
08:01Roddy Pete's back.
08:02He's back.
08:02She's back.
08:03Jill's back.
08:03Hi, Jill.
08:06Did you miss me?
08:12Sure, I miss you.
08:14Are you okay?
08:15Oh, yeah.
08:18You ever twist your neck real fast, get one of those cricks?
08:22Well, I got that.
08:25Do you want me to rub it?
08:27Your neck?
08:30Now, if I put my hand like this, ooh, it feels much better now.
08:34Okay.
08:35Ooh, look at this.
08:38Endive souffle prepared with mushrooms.
08:41Yes!
08:47Mushroom, mm.
08:51Tim, you don't like mushrooms.
08:54At home, no, but here, you know, they're in oils.
08:58And stuff here, yeah.
08:59Oh, look, look, they have your favorite, trout almondine.
09:01All right!
09:03What happened?
09:05I'm having the trout!
09:13Tim, would you like to tell me what's going on while you're, uh, sitting like that?
09:17My neck.
09:18Well, perhaps I should look at it.
09:19No!
09:20No.
09:21From the naked eye, it would look like any other neck.
09:23And it's a cricks or generally inside necks.
09:27Give me your hand.
09:27Hey, hey, look at that.
09:29Give me your other hand.
09:30I don't want to.
09:35Oh, Tim, give me the radio.
09:38I wasn't going to listen to the whole thing.
09:41Would it help if I said I was sorry?
09:43It might.
09:44I'm sorry.
09:45It didn't.
09:45Is this the volume?
09:47Oh!
09:52That's it, boys.
09:54Nice and tight.
09:55Salary loves a challenge.
09:58This is too cool.
10:00Oh, thank you, my lad.
10:02Do we get to stick swords in the box?
10:04Sword in the box.
10:05Fantastic illusion.
10:07Sense the mind reeling and the pulse racing.
10:10I don't do it.
10:15Why not?
10:16Too easy.
10:18Now then, my lad, will you kindly assist me into the trunk?
10:25Now, you will close the trunk and lock it.
10:29When I give the command, you will set the timer at ten seconds, and when the timer goes
10:35off, I shall appear at the front door.
10:41I don't know.
10:42Ten seconds isn't very long.
10:44To you, but to Salary, ten seconds is an eternity.
10:49Now, boys, prepare to be astonished.
10:55Close the lid.
11:03Is the trunk securely locked?
11:06Yes, it is.
11:08Then set the timer and stand back.
11:36Sir Larry!
11:37Sir Larry!
11:38Boys!
11:44Reset the timer!
11:48You know what you are, Tim.
11:50You are a sports addict.
11:52I am not.
11:53I like sports.
11:54I have a very healthy interest, but I am not an addict.
12:01Is that the Lions game on in there?
12:03Yes, that's why service is a little slow.
12:05The staff have a television in the kitchen.
12:07Hey.
12:08Hey.
12:11Did you get a score?
12:13Well, what's the score?
12:14I'm not sure.
12:14I know the Lions intercepted a pass on the Rams' 20.
12:18Yes!
12:19I bet it was Spielman.
12:20Oh, Chris Spielman.
12:21Awesome player.
12:21Last week's team against Minnesota.
12:23See him?
12:24Man, I was there.
12:27I can't take it.
12:28I can't take it.
12:28I've got to see this game.
12:30Honey, I'm sorry.
12:31I'll be back.
12:37Oh, that guy's got a problem.
12:46That guy is addicted to sports.
12:49He is out of control.
12:54And you're not.
12:56No, no, no.
12:57We're here to talk about whatever you want to talk about.
13:00Well, that's good, because I want to talk about us.
13:02Oh.
13:03You know how we're always talking about how we need to find more things that we can do together for
13:07fun?
13:07Yeah.
13:08We always talk about it, but we never do anything about it.
13:10Let's do something about it.
13:11Yeah.
13:12Next weekend, monster truck rally and tractor pull.
13:17Well, gee, as much fun as that sounds, I was really thinking more along the lines of ballroom dancing.
13:27Yeah.
13:30Boy, that was my second choice.
13:32No, no, really.
13:33I'm serious.
13:34I think it would really be fun to take dancing lessons.
13:36Me?
13:36The king?
13:37Member of college?
13:39Yeah.
13:41Tim, disco didn't die.
13:42You killed it.
13:44Now, I'm talking about grown-up dancing, Fred and Ginger.
13:48I thought Fred married Wilma.
13:49No.
13:51You know what I mean.
13:53You know, holding each other close, swaying to the music, gliding across the floor.
13:58Gliding in public's not me.
14:00We can take private lessons, just you and me.
14:01Nope.
14:02Oh, unbelievable.
14:05Uh-oh.
14:06Come here.
14:06You got to see this.
14:07Sanders just broke one for 50 yards around the right side.
14:10They tackled him on the one.
14:11We're going to score.
14:12It's a first down.
14:13Happy anniversary, baby.
14:29Honey.
14:31Would you like to go and watch the game?
14:34No.
14:35No.
14:36We were talking about...
14:43Ballroom dancing.
14:43Ballroom dancing.
14:44That's right.
14:47So, anyway, the lessons are on Tuesday nights.
14:50Uh-huh.
14:51And it doesn't really cost very much.
14:53Oh.
14:55And I've been having an affair with a space alien.
14:57Uh-huh.
14:59Yep.
15:00I'm having his baby.
15:01Uh-huh.
15:03Go, go, touchdown!
15:16Honey.
15:18Go.
15:20I'm fine.
15:21I don't have to see the game.
15:21Trust me.
15:22It's okay.
15:22I really want you to go.
15:36Hello?
15:37Hi, Mommy.
15:39Guess what happened to Sir Larry.
15:40Mark!
15:43Don't tell her, stupid.
15:45What?
15:45He didn't do anything.
15:47The guy's locked in a box.
15:49Who do you think she's going to blame?
15:52Ah!
15:54Hi, Mom.
15:56Yeah, we're fine.
15:57Oh, yeah.
15:58He's excellent.
15:59A lot of fun.
16:01Yeah.
16:02Good tricks, too.
16:05Um, now?
16:08Well, um, he can't talk right now.
16:11Um, he just can't.
16:14She wants to talk to Mark.
16:16That's because she knows you'll squeal.
16:18I won't squeal.
16:20I promise.
16:24Hello, Mommy.
16:26Brad and Randy wants to lay in the trunk.
16:33Oh, boys.
16:35It's okay, Sir Larry.
16:37If we get the trunk high enough and drop it,
16:39it'll break open.
16:40Please, let's not be hasty, boys.
16:44Mom and Dad are home.
16:46We're dead.
16:47Hi.
16:48Boys.
16:49Randy, Mark.
16:50Brad.
16:52Out here.
16:58Mark, where is Mr. Houdini?
17:01Oh.
17:02In there.
17:03Are you all right, Mr. Houdini?
17:05I'm fine.
17:06The x-rays may reveal otherwise, however.
17:10Mark, where are your brothers?
17:12I don't know, Dad.
17:13In the bushes.
17:15Here, honey.
17:18Brad, Randy, come on out.
17:19Come on.
17:20Come on right now.
17:21I don't know what gets into you guys sometimes.
17:23What did you stuff that old man in that trunk for?
17:25He told us to.
17:26Now, why would he want to be put in the trunk?
17:27But he did tell us to.
17:29Yeah, he did.
17:29It's the truth.
17:30He's not.
17:31The boys are speaking the truth.
17:33They are completely innocent.
17:34Well, we'll talk about this in the morning.
17:36It's bedtime now.
17:37Come on.
17:37I want to see if he gets out.
17:39No, no, no.
17:39I'll be up here later.
17:40Go on.
17:41Honey, we're in some kind of trouble.
17:44These are reinforced polycarbonate American butt hinges.
17:51Sir Larry, is there anything that we can do?
17:53Someone we can call?
17:54Yes, you can call my son, Cyril the Magnificent.
17:58He has an extra set of keys, and he's at 555-7653.
18:03All right.
18:03I'll call right away.
18:05Hang in there, Sir Larry, and just take real short little breaths.
18:11Wilson?
18:13Howdy, neighbor.
18:14What are you doing over there?
18:15Oh, just mending the bellows in my accordion.
18:17Cool.
18:18What's in the trunk?
18:20Famous magician.
18:21Oh, is he coming out of the box?
18:22As soon as his son comes over and unlocks it.
18:25Not much of a trick, Tim.
18:28You got a minute?
18:29Sure, good buddy.
18:30You got a problem?
18:31Well, it's Jill.
18:33I love her.
18:34She's the most important thing in my life.
18:36Why did you do this time, Tim?
18:38Um, we went out tonight to have a night just by ourselves, real romantic, that kind of stuff,
18:44and I spoiled it because of a football game.
18:47We won?
18:48Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
18:50I don't know what it is about football and me.
18:53I'm obsessed, I think.
18:54Well, why do you think that is, Tim?
18:57I think it's because I love it, Wilson.
18:59I love the surprise and the strategy and the strength and the big guys and the logos and
19:05the colorful helmets and the shine and the pads and the mouth guards and the cleats and
19:09the hit and the impact, the swear and the sweat, and ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!
19:16Sets me free, Wilson.
19:18What you're describing, Tim, is what Aristotle would call a catharsis.
19:23Catharsis?
19:24Hmm.
19:25You spell this.
19:26Yeah, let's just say an emotional release, Tim.
19:30Bingo.
19:31That's what I feel, and I don't think she understands that.
19:34Well, she doesn't have to, Tim.
19:36I'm sure there are things about her that you don't understand.
19:38Well, you got that right.
19:40You know, that woman has never had a haircut she liked.
19:43Well, there you go.
19:44And I go into her closet, I see 19 pairs of black shoes.
19:49What's that all about?
19:50Well, Tim, different outfits require different shoes.
19:54You've got your pumps, your flats, your espadrilles, your open toes, your key straps, your patent leather.
20:00I could go on and on.
20:01Get the feeling you could.
20:02The point is, you and Jill don't have to understand each other completely.
20:06What is important is to share and enjoy the things you both do understand.
20:12That's exactly what she was talking about, too.
20:15Sharing.
20:16She wanted to share ballroom dancing.
20:19Well, why don't you give it a try, Tim?
20:20All right.
20:21As the ancient Celtic saying goes, never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
20:27Huh?
20:29Sir Larry?
20:30Still in here.
20:32Yes, um, Cyril is on his way over with the keys.
20:35Oh, thank you, kind madam.
20:44Hi.
20:45Hi.
20:46About tonight, Jill.
20:48I know I was stupid.
20:50I know I spoiled things.
20:52I want to apologize.
20:54And I won't watch all-day football anymore.
21:00What about Thanksgiving and New Year's?
21:03Ah.
21:05Half day.
21:08All right.
21:09I'll cut out the pregame show or something.
21:11I'll just try not to be so stupid about it.
21:16You'd do that for me?
21:17In a second.
21:22Well, we can always try and do it again.
21:25Go out some evening.
21:26Have some romance.
21:28Well, we're here.
21:31We're alone.
21:33Moon's full.
21:34It's pretty romantic.
21:35What more do you need?
21:36Moon's full.
21:49No.
21:51I'll be loving you always
21:57With the love that's true always
22:05When the things you planned
22:07Need a helping hand
22:12I will understand
22:17Always, always
22:19Fate may not be fair
22:23Always
22:27What's your cut the opening?
22:28You're ready to lay the sink in there, right?
22:30Yeah?
22:31That's right, Tim.
22:33You know, home improvement's not just about
22:35Renovating the kitchen.
22:37There's a lot of other ways to improve your home.
22:40Always be aware
22:41Of your partner's needs.
22:43Take time out to share
22:45Some special time with your spouse.
22:48Right, Al?
22:49I'm not married, Tim.
22:52Well, if you change those shirts
22:53And get a haircut or something.
22:55I got a haircut.
22:56That better, Al.
22:58Okay.
22:59All right.
23:00We drop it on three, huh?
23:01On three.
23:01One, two...
23:03All right!
23:06No!
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