00:00Each time you're on,
00:02time is very easy,
00:05we'll do the same for you.
00:07When your room looks kinda weird,
00:10and you wish that you weren't there,
00:13just close your eyes and speak to me,
00:16and you can be every way.
00:21We'll do the same for you.
00:33Okay, as you can see,
00:36there's nothing in my hand,
00:38nothing up my sleeve,
00:39nothing in my ear...
00:41And nothing in your head either, Fozzie.
00:44Get on with the trick.
00:45Yeah, yeah, come on, do it, Fozzie.
00:48Come on, Fozzie, do the trick!
00:50Magic!
00:51Okay, okay.
00:52The amazing Waka Waka
00:54will now perform the world's most difficult card trick.
00:59Pick a card, Kermit.
01:01Hmm, um...
01:05Now put the card back in the pile
01:08without letting me see it.
01:10Um, okay, Fozzie.
01:13Whoa!
01:15Sorry.
01:20There!
01:21Ready?
01:22Your card is...
01:24The Nine of Diamonds, right?
01:27Um, no.
01:30Uh, the Six of Spades?
01:31Nope.
01:33Uh, Ace of Hearts?
01:34Wrong.
01:35Oh, I got it!
01:37The Jack of Diamonds!
01:39Not even close.
01:40Two of Hearts?
01:42Nope.
01:43Ten of Spades?
01:44Uh-uh.
01:45Uh, Queen of Clubs?
01:46No.
01:47Aha!
01:48I got it!
01:49After careful consideration,
01:51I have determined positively
01:52that your card is...
01:54The Joker!
01:55Sorry, Fozzie.
01:56You're the only Joker around here, Fozzie.
01:59Yeah!
02:00Oh, boy!
02:01That wasn't much of a card trick.
02:02Yeah!
02:03A card trick!
02:04Um, maybe you ought to practice a little more, Fozzie.
02:08Okay.
02:08It's my turn to do a trick.
02:13Whoop!
02:16I, the Great Thoncini, can escape from anything!
02:21He he!
02:22He he!
02:24He he he!
02:25And now, my lovely Assistant Piggy will assist me with a little assistance, as I attempt
02:32my impossible escape!
02:38Alright, Piggy!
02:39Place the chains on my wrists!
02:43Whoa!
02:45Whoa!
02:46Whoa!
02:47Yeah!
02:48Uh, Piggy?
02:49You think that's enough rocks and chains?
02:53You said the Great Thoncini can escape from anything, right?
02:58Oh, well, uh...
03:05Oh, boy!
03:06Oatmeal!
03:07Whoa!
03:12Whoa!
03:19Oatmeal!
03:23Let's see you get out of that Smarty Pants!
03:29Oh!
03:36Ta da!
03:37Another impossible escape from a treacherous bowl of oatmeal!
03:44Escape from that, Mr. Conzini.
03:48She served me breakfast.
03:51How romantic.
03:56My turn.
03:59Watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat.
04:03Yay!
04:05Rabbit!
04:07That's not funny, Animal.
04:09Where's my stuffed rabbit?
04:11No, not now.
04:19Here's looking at you, sweetheart.
04:22What did you say, Gonzo?
04:24Me? I didn't say anything.
04:27Kills germs that can cause bad breath.
04:31All right, you asked for it, Gonzo.
04:35Piggy, wait.
04:36It's my turn to do some magic.
04:39Just as soon as I finish my last trick, Skeeter.
04:44Oh, dirty wet.
04:45What did you call me?
04:47I didn't call you anything.
04:50You belong in a zoo.
04:52The San Diego Zoo.
04:55What did you say that for, Fuzzy?
04:58Say what for?
04:59Hi, kids. Have you seen...
05:01It's partly cloudy with a high in the afternoon of 65.
05:07Turn off the TV, will you, Piggy?
05:09But it's not on, Nanny.
05:12Get rid of those ugly denture stains.
05:15What did you say, Fuzzy?
05:16I didn't say anything.
05:20Killed roaches dead.
05:22What, Gonzo?
05:24I didn't say it honest.
05:27Coming to a theater or a drive-in near you.
05:31Batteries not included.
05:33Hi, poison girl.
05:34Why, Polly.
05:36There you are.
05:37I thought you might have flown in here.
05:39Gee, I didn't know you had an eagle, Nanny.
05:43Eagle?
05:44He's a parrot, Fuzzy.
05:46And he's not mine, yet.
05:48I've got him unknown from the pet shop to see if I like him.
05:51Oh, me?
05:52So, that's good.
05:54Wow.
05:54Birdie.
05:55Maybe you can help me decide whether to keep him or not.
05:58Wow.
05:59Our own talking bird.
06:01Can we play with him, Nanny?
06:03Well, okay.
06:05But only if you promise to take good care of him.
06:08We promise?
06:09I'll be right back with his cage.
06:11Keep an eye on him.
06:12Sure thing, Nanny.
06:14What big eyes you have, Grandma?
06:17Eyes?
06:18What about this big schnozola?
06:20Big schnozola.
06:23Oh, thanks.
06:25My name's Polly.
06:27What's yours?
06:28I'm Scooter.
06:30I'm Skeeter.
06:31Fuzzy, pleased to meet you.
06:33I'm Rumpf.
06:34I'm Kermit.
06:35And this is Piggy.
06:37Hello, Polly.
06:38I'm Bonzo.
06:39But my friends call me Weirdo.
06:42Me, Animo.
06:43Me, Animo.
06:47Here, Polly.
06:49Here, Polly.
06:50Polly?
06:51Now, you kids, remember, don't open the window.
06:54Sometimes Polly picks the lock and gets out of his cage.
06:56Cage!
06:57Don't worry, Nanny.
06:59We'll take good care of him.
07:01Okay.
07:01I'll be back in a little while.
07:03I think Polly would like a cookie.
07:04Polly want a cookie.
07:05Polly want a cookie.
07:07Turn around, Gonzo.
07:20Here you are, Polly.
07:22Just like Mama used to make.
07:25Uh, Piggy, can I have a cookie, too?
07:28Oh, sorry, Gonzo.
07:30Oh, these cookies are for birdies only.
07:33Birdies?
07:34Well, uh, I'm a birdie.
07:36See?
07:36I got a beak and feathers.
07:38How about a cookie, huh?
07:40Well, what do you think, Polly?
07:43Boyd, we're prohibited by law.
07:45I guess that means no, Gonzo.
07:48Oh, Polly, you talk too much.
07:51Wait a minute.
07:53Seek?
07:54Feathers?
07:56Maybe I really am a bird.
08:03Then again?
08:04Maybe not.
08:05Oh, you're a bird, all right.
08:07A dodo bird.
08:09Dodo bird!
08:10Dodo bird!
08:11Gosh, if I could fly, I sure wouldn't like living in a cage.
08:16Me neither.
08:17Gosh, if I lived in a cage, I'd try to escape.
08:21Escape?
08:22Ah-ha!
08:24Don't worry, Polly.
08:26The great Gonzoomy will break you out of your prison.
08:41Yep, we're almost under the prison animal.
08:44Keep digging.
08:45Okay.
08:46Well, I'll never let it go.
08:51Ah, thanks, animal.
08:54That was cool.
08:57Ah!
08:59Ah, are you sure this is the right prison animal?
09:03I don't see any jailbirds around here.
09:06Hello, weirdo.
09:08Huh?
09:08Great peace.
09:12All right, animal.
09:14Give me those bolt cutters.
09:16What?
09:22Come.
09:23Come.
09:25Whoa.
09:27Wow.
09:28Unbelievable, isn't it?
09:30Jailbreak.
09:32Sound the alarm.
09:34Whee-yoo!
09:36Whee-yoo!
09:37Whee-yoo!
09:39Yeah!
09:40Let's beat it, Polly.
09:42Whee-yoo!
09:46Whee-yoo!
09:47Eskiii-y cΕ©ng!
09:48Hahaha!
09:52Thanks!
09:56We made it, Polly.
09:58You're free as a bird.
10:00So, uh, where do you want to go?
10:03Brazil? Hawaii?
10:05Yeah, that's the ticket.
10:08Huh?
10:09Boy, that's gratitude for you.
10:12No.
10:14You're running out of his cage.
10:16Uh-oh.
10:17Oh, no.
10:18You're running out of his cage.
10:20He's in here somewhere.
10:22Shh.
10:23You'll scare him if you talk too much.
10:26You talk too much.
10:27Huh? What?
10:28I do not talk too much, Kermit.
10:31Huh?
10:32How could you possibly think that I talk too much
10:34when anybody can tell you that everybody in this nursery talks far more than me?
10:38I mean, moi.
10:39But, but...
10:40So, there.
10:42Hmm.
10:42Sheesh.
10:45I think I saw him crawling here.
10:50All right, don't move, partner.
10:52I got you covered.
10:53Uh-huh. I give up.
10:56You look silly, Scooter.
10:59Hey, that wasn't funny, Scooter.
11:01You're the one that's acting weird.
11:03I didn't do anything.
11:05Did so.
11:06Did not.
11:07Did so.
11:08Did not.
11:08Did so.
11:09Did not.
11:09I saw you.
11:10Maybe he crawled into his shoe.
11:14Don't shoot until you see the lights of their eyes.
11:17Waka waka waka.
11:18You think you're funny, don't you, Fozzie?
11:21Uh, yeah.
11:22I guess so.
11:23Well, guess again.
11:25Because you're not.
11:26Gee, what did I do?
11:30Beam me up.
11:31Whoa!
11:32Huh?
11:33Hey, animal, cut it out.
11:36Fire photon torpedo.
11:39Ow, hot knee.
11:45Hey, let go my shoe!
11:50Tommy.
11:52Warp factor nine, Mr. Sulu.
11:54You better leave me alone.
11:56Stop it!
11:59But Piggy, I didn't see.
12:01Don't bother apologizing.
12:02I'm not speaking to you, Frog.
12:05Huh?
12:06Okay, from now on, this is my side of the room.
12:09And that's yours, Scooter.
12:11So just keep out, okay?
12:12Oh, yeah?
12:13Well, you keep out of my side, then.
12:16You snap at me one more time, animal.
12:19And I'm never letting you eat my crayons again.
12:25You don't go away.
12:27Coming up next, sports and weather.
12:38Gosh, Polly, I've never seen Piggy so mad at me.
12:42I must have said something real dumb.
12:45Real dumb!
12:46Real dumb!
12:48I can't understand how my Kermie could think I talk too much.
12:52He's always been so nice to me.
12:55Oh, hello, Polly.
12:58Hello.
12:59I don't think Kermit likes me anymore.
13:02Did he say anything to you about me?
13:05Real dumb!
13:06Real dumb!
13:07What?
13:08Um, there's something I want to tell you, Piggy.
13:12No thanks, Buster.
13:14Polly already told me what you said.
13:17Huh?
13:17He did?
13:18I wouldn't talk to you again if you were the last frog on Earth!
13:25Keep your eyes peeled, Polly.
13:27There's got to be at least one other frog on Earth.
13:30Hey, frog!
13:31Off the starboard bow!
13:33Ribbit?
13:34Ribbit?
13:35Wait a minute!
13:36You're not a frog!
13:38Sure I am!
13:39I'll prove it!
13:42I know what you're thinking.
13:44This is disgusting.
13:46But I'll do anything to impress that pig!
13:51Whoops!
13:53Good job, you little faker!
13:58Oh, well.
13:59You can't blame a weirdo for trying.
14:03Whoops!
14:04Yes!
14:08It's him!
14:10The last frog on Earth!
14:13What a hunk!
14:15Bonjour, my little piglet.
14:17Oh, a French frog!
14:20Ooh la la!
14:22I've been looking for a piglet like you all of my life.
14:26Come, let me sweep you of your little pig's feet.
14:31Oh, sweep!
14:33Sweep!
14:38You've danced it finally!
14:45Oh, piggy?
14:47First up, Kermit!
14:48Can't you see I'm dancing with that frog of my dreams?
14:53Huh?
14:55You look troubled, Kemosapis.
14:58Oh, hi, Polly.
14:59I was just thinking about how mean I was to Skeeter.
15:03Hey, I know!
15:05You could go give her a message for me.
15:08Please leave your message at the sound of the beep.
15:11Beep!
15:12All right, Polly.
15:14Say, Scooter says he's sorry for being a nerd.
15:17Sorry for being a nerd!
15:19Ah!
15:21I guess I better go make up with Scooter.
15:24Ah!
15:24Sorry!
15:25Scooter says you're a nerd!
15:28Is that so?
15:29Well, I'll tell Scooter what I think of him.
15:33Oh, hi, Skeeter.
15:35So I'm a nerd, huh?
15:38Huh?
15:38Well, you are a walrus face.
15:41A what?
15:42I am tired of having you for a brother, and I want a divorce.
15:47A divorce?
15:50Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?
15:55I do.
15:56Brother and sister divorce court is now in session.
16:00I want to divorce Scooter because he's a nerd.
16:04I object.
16:05I'm not a nerd.
16:06I'm just, well, smart for my age.
16:09Order in the court.
16:12I'll have a salami on rye and a cream soda.
16:15Waka, waka, waka.
16:16Polly!
16:18Sorry.
16:19I don't want to be Scooter's sister anymore.
16:22I'd rather have another brother.
16:24But you can't have another brother.
16:26We're twins.
16:27Too late.
16:28I now pronounce you perfect stranger.
16:31Pick up your new brother and sister in the next room.
16:34Ah!
16:40Oh, no!
16:42Let's get out of here!
16:44You think we're bad enough, but this is gross!
16:47Huh?
16:51Hi, Polly.
16:53Gee, I thought Rolf was my friend, but now I'm not so sure.
16:58What do you think?
17:00Get your teeth as wide as they can be.
17:03Oh, no, my teeth?
17:05They don't like my teeth?
17:06I guess I'm going to have to find some new friends.
17:16There must be some friendly people around here somewhere.
17:20Excuse me.
17:21I'm looking for a new friend.
17:23Don't bother me, kid.
17:24I'm late for work.
17:29Wow!
17:30If that guy can make friends by playing music, I'll bet I can make lots of friends by telling
17:36funny jokes.
17:37Hold it.
17:38Listen to this.
17:41What's black and white, black and white, and black and blue?
17:44Give up?
17:45A penguin falling down stairs.
17:48Waka waka.
17:49Want to be my friend?
17:53Gosh, I'd rather get a tomato from a friend than money from a stranger.
18:03Poor Fozzie.
18:09Let's talk about making up.
18:12Because breaking up is a sad situation.
18:16Shaking hands is the thing to do.
18:19Because me and you are a good combination.
18:23Two hands are hard to find.
18:27We're so lucky that we're eight of a kind.
18:29Remember to love, forgive and forget.
18:33Shows in your heart, and you'll never be ready.
18:37Through to the end, we gotta remember.
18:41Sometimes we get ugly lingers.
18:44Uh-uh.
18:45This is always a misunderstanding.
18:48Don't give up when you should give in.
18:51Oh, sure.
18:52I'm about to make a happy ending.
18:55Like when it rains, and then the sun comes out?
18:58Yeah, that's what friends are all about.
19:01Oh, yeah.
19:01Remember to love, forgive and forget.
19:05Show them in your heart, and you'll never be ready.
19:08Friendship is the end.
19:10We gotta remember.
19:12Remember to love.
19:15Hey, watch it, Fozzie.
19:17Show them in your heart.
19:20Your knees stop stubbing.
19:22We gotta remember.
19:25Remember to love.
19:31What do you mean?
19:33No.
19:41Gosh, Polly.
19:42It feels awful when everybody's upset with each other, huh?
19:46Feels awful.
19:48And I don't know how to make anybody feel better.
19:51Take two peanuts and call me in the morning.
19:55Huh?
19:56Gosh.
19:57I guess the only thing to do is to try talking to Piggy.
20:03Uh, gee, Piggy.
20:05Couldn't we be friends again?
20:07Really?
20:08I don't understand you, Kermit.
20:11Before you said that I talked too much and that I was dumb.
20:15And now you want to be friends?
20:17But I never said that.
20:19Wah!
20:20You talk too much.
20:22Huh?
20:23Oh, don't move, partner.
20:25I got you covered.
20:26Hey, I thought Skeeter said that.
20:29Don't shoot until you see the whites of their eyes.
20:33Wah-ka-wah-ka-wah-ka.
20:34You mean you didn't say that, Fozzie?
20:37Uh-uh.
20:38Does this mean you're still my friend?
20:40Of course, Fozzie.
20:41You're my best bear buddy.
20:43Huh?
20:44Gee, all this time we've been mad at each other because we thought what Polly said was what we said.
20:51Oh, Kermie.
20:52I always knew you were the sweetest frog in the world.
20:56I guess it's always better to talk things over after an argument, huh, Scooter?
21:01You mean you still want to be my sister?
21:04Uh-huh.
21:06Are we still friends, Animal?
21:09Friend!
21:11Actually, I'm getting you.
21:13You're all here, you're getting you.
21:16Oh, kids.
21:18Huh?
21:19Quick!
21:19We've got to get Polly back in his cage before Nanny comes in.
21:25Here, boy!
21:26Polly!
21:27You're not Polly!
21:28Come here, Polly!
21:30Get in your cage!
21:31Come here, Polly!
21:33It's over here!
21:35Come on, Polly!
21:36Polly, come on!
21:37Come on, Polly, quick!
21:41Hi, kids!
21:43Hi, Nanny!
21:44Well, what do you think?
21:46Do we keep Polly?
21:48No!
21:48What?
21:49But I thought you liked him.
21:51We thought so, too, Nanny.
21:53Polly's nice and all that.
21:55And we wouldn't want you to give him back if you really love him, but, well...
22:01He talks too much!
22:03Too much!
22:04Too much!
22:05He talks too much!
22:07He talks too much!
22:09Gosh!
22:10Does this mean poor Polly won't have a home?
22:13Not necessarily, Fozzie.
22:14I think I know someone who might like him.
22:17I'll make a phone call.
22:20Everything's going to work out fine, kids.
22:23Officer Carruthers wants to adopt Polly.
22:25Hey, me!
22:27Ray!
22:27Hello, Polly.
22:29Ah, roger.
22:30One out of 13.
22:31See the woman at the corner of Sunset and Bronson, Code 2.
22:34Woo!
22:35Woo!
22:36Woo!
22:38I think Polly and I are going to get along just fine.
22:43You'll never take me alive, Connors.
22:55Every Saturday evening, you get not one, not two, not three, but four pork chops and wallabies
23:01squash and grumble scaring, toddler tearing, Nicktoons in a row on Doug Rocco, all real monsters
23:07and rugrats.
23:08This ought to be good.
23:10So don't miss two straight hours of Nicktoons, today and every Saturday evening at 6, 5 Central,
23:15only on Nick.
23:16Now stay tuned for Beetlejuice.
23:18Next on Nick.
23:28This isn't funny, animal.
23:30Let me out of here.
23:32Cracker?
23:33No!
23:33I don't want a cracker.
23:35I want you to let me out.
23:37Isn't he darling, honey?
23:38I've never seen such a cute little bird.
23:41Let's take him home.
23:42Hey!
23:43No!
23:43Stop!
23:44I'm not a bird.
23:45I'm a weirdo!
23:46When I get out of here, animal, you're in big trouble!
23:51Do you hear me?
23:52Bye-bye!
23:53Birdie!
23:54Lava!
23:55Lava!
23:56Lava!
23:57Lava!
23:57Lava!
23:57Lava!
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