00:00Good morning, my Christian friends.
00:03Today I want to discuss when you stop guessing and finally reach for God.
00:09You know, some of the hardest questions in life do not come from curiosity.
00:14They come from pain.
00:17Yeah.
00:18They come from those quiet moments when you've tried to keep going,
00:22tried to stay strong,
00:25tried to act like you're okay,
00:26and deep down, you're not okay at all.
00:30You're tired.
00:31You're disappointed because you're carrying things you cannot fix.
00:37Then, somewhere inside you, this question rises up.
00:42Can you really know God personally?
00:45Or is that just something people say when they're trying to comfort themselves?
00:51It's a good question.
00:53You know, that question matters because a lot of people do not want religion.
00:58They don't want a speech and they don't want a polished answer that sounds nice for five minutes
01:04and then leaves them in the same empty place afterward.
01:08They don't want rules.
01:10They don't want to have to climb some religious ladder.
01:12They just want to know if God is real in the kind of way that changes the room when you're
01:19alone.
01:21They want to know if he is there when the nights get long,
01:25when the fear starts talking,
01:28when the guilt comes back,
01:30or when the silence feels heavy.
01:34And, you know, a lot of us feel like life has knocked something out of us.
01:39And we want to know if he can be known.
01:43Not in theory, but personally.
01:47A God I can reach out to, touch, feel.
01:52And I think that's where a lot of people get stuck.
01:56They hear about God, but they don't know how to get past the idea of God.
02:03They hear what others say.
02:05They hear verses.
02:07They hear stories.
02:08They hear people talk about faith like it's something clear and easy.
02:14It's not.
02:16Because, meanwhile, some are sitting there wondering why it feels so far away from them.
02:23And maybe you have prayed and felt nothing.
02:26Maybe you have believed before and then life hit you hard enough that everything got blurry.
02:34Maybe you want to believe, but you do not want to fake it.
02:40You don't want to pretend you have a relationship with God
02:44when all you really feel is distance.
02:48You know what?
02:49That honesty matters more than you think.
02:54A real relationship with God does not begin when you become impressive.
03:00It begins when you stop hiding.
03:03It begins when you stop trying to bring him a cleaned up version of yourself.
03:09You know, the version you post on social media.
03:13It begins when you finally say the truth.
03:18God, I don't know where you are.
03:22God, I want to believe, but I'm struggling.
03:28God, I'm tired of feeling empty.
03:32God, if you are really there, I need something real.
03:38You know, a lot of people think they have to climb their way to God.
03:41God, they think they have to become more spiritual first, more disciplined, more pure, or more certain to be more
03:51worthy.
03:52But that is not how real relationships work.
03:57Real relationship starts with honesty.
04:02It starts with turning towards someone instead of away from them.
04:07It starts when the mask comes off.
04:11And you know what?
04:12Knowing God personally is not about performing for him.
04:17It's not about following a bunch of rules or saying the right words in the right order.
04:22It is not about building some fake religious image and hoping that will somehow make you feel close to him.
04:32It's about bringing your real self into the light and finding out that he is not backing away.
04:40And that's what really changes people.
04:44Not pressure or pretending.
04:46Not trying to look strong while you're falling apart inside.
04:51What changes people is realizing that God already sees the worst of what is in you.
04:57The fear.
04:58The doubt.
05:00The selfishness.
05:02The mess.
05:03The regret.
05:04And he still calls you toward him.
05:07That is personal.
05:10That is not distant.
05:12It is not cold.
05:14And it is not a God hiding behind a locked door.
05:19You know, some people are afraid to reach for God because they think they will be rejected.
05:25Others are afraid because they think nothing will happen and they will feel foolish for trying.
05:32I understand both of those fears as a former atheist.
05:36And it's hard to reach out when your heart has already taken a beating.
05:42It's hard to open up when disappointment has trained you to expect silence.
05:48But sometimes, sometimes, the deepest breakthrough in a person's life starts in a very simple moment.
05:58Not dramatic, not loud, just real.
06:03A person finally stops running, stops acting, stops filling the air with noise.
06:11And in the quiet of that honest moment, they turn toward God for real.
06:18And that turn matters.
06:22You may not get fireworks.
06:25You may not get instant answers to every question.
06:28You may not suddenly feel everything you want to feel in one night.
06:33But that does not mean nothing is real.
06:36Some of the most real things in life begin quietly.
06:42Trust begins quietly.
06:44Healing begins quietly.
06:48Love begins quietly.
06:52A real relationship with God often begins that way too.
06:56Not with a performance, but with a surrender.
07:01Not with certainty about everything, but a willing heart that says,
07:08God, I am here, and I need you.
07:13You know, there is something so beautiful about that.
07:17Because it means you do not have to wait until you're better to come close.
07:23You do not have to fix yourself first.
07:26You do not have to follow a bunch of religious rules.
07:29You do not have to become some polished spiritual person before God will meet you.
07:36The lie says, get yourself together and then come.
07:41The truth says, come as you are and let God meet you there.
07:47And that is why this question is not hopeless.
07:53If you are asking, can you really know God personally?
07:58That hunger itself says something.
08:01It says there is still something in you reaching.
08:04It says you have not gone numb all the way through.
08:09And it says your heart is still looking for what is real.
08:13I do not believe God ignores that at all.
08:18I do not believe he plays games with a soul that honestly wants him.
08:23I do not believe he hides from the person who is finally done pretending.
08:30And maybe that's what you need today is not a bigger argument.
08:34Maybe you need one honest moment with God.
08:39Maybe you need to stop trying to sound spiritual and just speak plainly.
08:45Maybe you need to tell him exactly where you are.
08:49Tell him you feel far away.
08:52Tell him you are afraid.
08:54Tell him you're disappointed.
08:57Tell him you want something real.
08:59And then stay there.
09:02Not for show or out of duty.
09:05Stay there long enough to let your heart become honest.
09:10You can know God personally.
09:12Not because you earn it.
09:15Not because you become impressive enough to qualify.
09:19Not because you check the box off on every religious rule you've been taught.
09:25You can know him because he is personal.
09:29He moves toward people like you.
09:32He meets people like you in truth.
09:36He is closer than your fear has been telling you.
09:39Closer than your disappointment has been telling you.
09:44God is closer than your numbness has been telling you.
09:49So if you feel far from God today,
09:52do not let that feeling become your final truth.
09:56Feelings can be loud,
09:58but they are not always right.
10:01Emotion is not prophecy.
10:05Distance can feel personal and permanent when it is not.
10:10The door may not be closed the way you thought it was.
10:14It may be that God has been nearer than you knew.
10:18Waiting for the real you to stop performing
10:21and finally come close.
10:25That's where peace starts.
10:27Not in having every answer and
10:29not in suddenly becoming fearless.
10:33Peace starts when you realize
10:35you do not have to reach into empty space.
10:39You are reaching towards someone
10:42who already knows your name.
10:45God knows your name.
10:48And maybe today
10:50or in whatever quiet moment
10:53you find yourself listening to this.
10:55That's all you need to do.
10:59Stop guessing.
11:00Stop pretending.
11:02Stop holding back.
11:04Just turn toward God honestly.
11:09Bring him the part of you that hurts.
11:11Bring him the part of you that doubts.
11:16Bring him the part of you that still hopes.
11:19He is not hiding from you.
11:22And no, you are not crazy
11:25for wanting something real.
11:29You were made for this.
11:31God loves you.
11:36My name is Douglas Vandergraaf
11:39and I believe in Jesus Christ.
11:42God bless you, my friends.
11:45God bless every single one of you.
11:50Every single one.
11:54Bye-bye.
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