00:00And, you know, once you develop and foster a good relationship with the Lord, you start to feel bulletproof.
00:07And, you know, that can kind of lead you astray a little bit if you think about it.
00:12Because I always think things should happen on my timeline.
00:16Hey, I prayed for it. Where is it at?
00:19You know, hey, God is protecting me.
00:21Nothing bad will happen to me.
00:23But I think some people are still struggling, not because they do not care about God.
00:30They're struggling because they cared, they trusted, they hoped, they prayed, and life still hit them hard.
00:40You know, that can change a person.
00:44It'll change the way you look at the future.
00:46It'll change how fast you let your heart believe.
00:49It'll change how open you are when somebody says, just trust God.
00:55It'll change the way you pray.
00:57And it'll change the way you hope.
01:01Because once life has hurt you enough, trust stops feeling simple.
01:07Hey, we're human.
01:08You can still believe God is real.
01:11You can still believe Jesus is Lord.
01:14You can still want to be close to Him.
01:17But something inside you becomes slower, more careful, more guarded with the relationship, more tired.
01:28And I think a lot of people feel guilty about that.
01:31You know, they think if they were stronger, they would trust faster.
01:36If they were better, they would not hesitate.
01:39And if they really had faith, they would not still feel this tension in their chest every time they try
01:47to hand something over to God.
01:50But sometimes the issue is not rebellion.
01:54Sometimes the issue is just pain.
01:59Sometimes the reason you're slow to trust is because you have lived through things that left a mark on you.
02:06You asked God for healing and it did not come the way you hoped.
02:11You prayed for a relationship and it still broke apart.
02:16You begged for peace and still spent nights wrestling in your own mind.
02:21Or you believed things were going to turn around and instead they got heavier.
02:29And that does something to a heart.
02:31And the hardest part is that people around you can make it sound easy.
02:37They say trust God like it's a switch.
02:42They, you know, they speak about it like you can just flip it back on.
02:50But if you've been hurt deeply enough, trust can start to feel dangerous.
03:01Not just with people, but with God too.
03:06You do not always say that out loud and most people don't.
03:11You just feel it.
03:13You feel it in the pause before prayer.
03:17You feel it in the way your hope pulls back a little.
03:20You feel it when a new burden shows up and your first instinct is not peace.
03:27It's tension.
03:29You feel it when a part of you wants to believe, but another part of you is bracing for more
03:37pain.
03:38And you know what?
03:39That's real.
03:41And I think we need to say something clearly here.
03:44Being wounded is not the same thing as not loving God.
03:50Being cautious is not the same thing as turning your back on him.
03:55And being tired is not the same thing as being faithless.
04:01Some people are not hard-hearted.
04:05They're just hurt-hearted.
04:08There's a difference.
04:10And Jesus knows the difference.
04:13Don't think he doesn't.
04:14You know, I think we think we have to be a certain way or God will turn away.
04:18God's expecting a certain set of words or a certain prayer.
04:23God is just expecting you to show up the way you are.
04:28He's not afraid of hard questions.
04:30And he's not afraid of misunderstanding.
04:34You see, that matters.
04:36Because a lot of people think they have to hide the struggle from God.
04:40They think they have to come to him sounding strong, sounding certain, or sounding steady.
04:48You know, with a mitigation strategy in place already.
04:52You're going to solve your own problems.
04:55And then you sound more put together than you really are.
05:00But Jesus, you see, Jesus has never been intimidated by the truth.
05:05He's not scared of your hesitation.
05:08He's not offended by your questions, no matter what they are.
05:13And he's not disappointed that trust feels hard for you right now.
05:19He already knows why.
05:21He already knows what happened.
05:24He knows what you lost.
05:26He knows how many prayers you prayed.
05:29He knows what let you down.
05:32He knows where the wound is.
05:35And he's not standing far away from that place.
05:39He's standing right there, in it.
05:43I think sometimes people imagine trust like this big heroic feeling.
05:48Like one giant moment where you finally feel fearless and hand everything over to God with no tension left in
05:56you.
05:57Boom, miracle, problem solved.
05:59But a lot of real trust does not look like that.
06:04A lot of real trust looks much smaller, quieter, and more honest.
06:12It looks like saying, God, I still want to believe you, even though part of me is struggling right now.
06:20You know, it looks like praying while still feeling shaky.
06:24It looks like opening your Bible when your heart feels tired.
06:29It looks like coming back to Jesus without pretending you are not wounded.
06:34And it looks like telling him the truth instead of performing strength.
06:43Maybe not the loud version that social media and the modern world tells you it needs to be.
06:51But it's a real version.
06:54And sometimes the real version is more precious because it costs more.
06:59Anybody can say they trust God when life makes sense.
07:04Anybody can say they trust God when the answers come fast.
07:08Anybody can say they trust God when the road is smooth.
07:14But when you've been disappointed and you still turn toward Jesus,
07:19even slowly or carefully with tears in your eyes,
07:25that matters.
07:27And that's not fake faith, my friends.
07:31That is costly faith.
07:34And the truth is, broken trust does not heal through pressure.
07:40It heals through love.
07:44And Jesus does not heal your trust by yelling at you to trust harder.
07:49He heals your trust by showing you who he is.
07:54He stays with you.
07:56He's patient.
07:58He does not walk away from your weakness.
08:01He does not shame your pain.
08:04And he does not demand that you become fearless overnight.
08:09He keeps meeting you again and again.
08:14And that's how trust begins to grow again.
08:17Not because your life suddenly becomes easy.
08:21Not because every prayer gets answered right away.
08:24Not because all the pain disappears like that.
08:30But because somewhere in the middle of your real life,
08:34you start to realize that Jesus is still kind,
08:38still steady,
08:40still present,
08:41still faithful,
08:43and
08:43still close.
08:45And little by little,
08:47the heart starts to soften again.
08:50Not all at once.
08:52Not in some polished, dramatic way.
08:55But in real ways.
08:58You
08:59pray again.
09:01You hope again.
09:03You open up again.
09:05You stop assuming every silence means abandonment.
09:09You stop treating every delay like rejection.
09:13And you
09:14start to see just because life hurt you
09:17does not
09:18does not mean
09:20Jesus
09:22failed you.
09:23That's an important line.
09:26Life can wound you deeply without
09:28Jesus becoming untrustworthy.
09:31People can fail you without
09:33Jesus failing you.
09:35Outcomes can break your heart
09:37without Jesus breaking his word.
09:41And seasons
09:42can confuse you
09:43without Jesus losing control.
09:47And
09:47I know that's hard to hold
09:49when you're in the middle of pain.
09:51Because pain seems to
09:53narrow everything.
09:55It makes the wound feel like
09:57the whole story.
09:58It makes the disappointment feel final.
10:01It makes the trust
10:03feel risky.
10:05But
10:06Jesus
10:06is not asking you
10:08to trust him
10:08because your pain is small.
10:10He's asking you
10:12to trust him
10:12because
10:13he is still bigger
10:15than your pain.
10:17He is still good
10:18when you do not understand.
10:20Still near
10:22when you feel slow to believe.
10:25Still merciful
10:26when your heart feels bruised.
10:28And still strong
10:29when you do not have
10:32much strength left.
10:33So
10:34if trust feels hard
10:36right now
10:36don't pretend.
10:39Do not force
10:40some polished
10:41spiritual answer.
10:42And do not act like
10:44you are
10:44farther along
10:45than you are.
10:47Just be
10:48honest.
10:49Tell Jesus
10:50the truth.
10:51Tell him
10:52you're tired.
10:53Tell him
10:53you're cautious.
10:55Tell him
10:55you want to trust him
10:57but
10:57something in you
10:58is still hurting.
10:59Tell him
11:00life hit you hard.
11:02And tell him
11:03disappointment
11:04has changed you.
11:06Bring him
11:07the real thing.
11:09Because you know what?
11:11That's where
11:12healing starts.
11:13Not in pretending
11:15but in honesty.
11:17And maybe
11:19that's the word
11:19for somebody
11:20right now.
11:21You're not bad
11:23because trust
11:24feels hard.
11:25You're not weak
11:27because your heart
11:28is careful.
11:29you are not
11:30failing
11:31because pain
11:32made you slower
11:33to open up.
11:35You're human.
11:37You're wounded.
11:39And Jesus
11:40still wants you
11:41close.
11:42So come back
11:44to him honestly.
11:45Not polished.
11:47Not impressive.
11:48And not
11:49pretending.
11:50Just be
11:52honest with him.
11:54Because even
11:55if trust
11:56feels hard
11:56right now
11:57Jesus
11:58is still
11:59gentle
12:00enough
12:00to rebuild
12:02it.
12:03And
12:03that's
12:04the truth.
12:06My name
12:07is Douglas
12:08Vandergraaf
12:09and I believe
12:10in Jesus
12:10Christ.
12:12God bless
12:13every single
12:14one of you.
12:15Every
12:16single
12:18one.
12:21Bye-bye.
12:22Bye-bye.
12:23Bye-bye.
12:23Bye-bye.
12:23Bye-bye.
12:24Bye-bye.
12:25Bye-bye.
Comments