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00:00This video is brought to you by S.T.A.L.D.
00:35Welcome, Watchers of Illusion, to the Castle of Confusion.
00:40Phase across time with us once more, for this is the age of adventure.
00:46I, Treyguard, master of the dungeon, give you audience.
00:51Watch now, you armchair adventurers,
00:55while others, braver than yourselves, challenge the secrets of my lair.
01:01A quest is now in progress, so here's a progress report.
01:06Young Richard and his Yorkshire men are well into our dungeon game,
01:11if game it is, for who can say when traps like this lurk on the way?
01:16But still in dungeons, friends may dwell, a jester who may serve you well,
01:22especially when monsters prowl, or hostile monks with language foul.
01:28And so, with thanks to Folly's wit, our team press onwards, fighting fit.
01:34And now time turns, the fire burns, time out is gone, the quest is on.
01:41So am I.
01:43You're in a long corridor, with two doors on your left, two on your right,
01:47and one straight in front of you.
01:48Yeah.
01:49But on the doors on the left and the doors on the right,
01:52there are swords coming out of them at intervals.
01:55Warning team, Richard must time his progress with care.
01:59There should be a safe zone between the spear paths.
02:04Right, Richard.
02:06Yeah.
02:06Could you take one step forward, please?
02:09Small, small.
02:10Is that okay?
02:10Right, another one.
02:12Stop.
02:13No.
02:14Take us at this one here.
02:15Right, another one.
02:17Small.
02:18Stop.
02:19Yes, stop.
02:19Yes, you've got a bit more space, but we can...
02:21Spend it up.
02:22Yeah.
02:22Right, another step forward, small.
02:23Small.
02:24Right, another one.
02:25No.
02:26Yes, it's all right.
02:27One more, come on.
02:29That's enough.
02:32Spend it up, but I'll...
02:33Hold on.
02:34Right, another small step.
02:36Very small.
02:37Right, stop.
02:39I've walked!
02:39Walk!
02:40No, stop, stop, stop, stop.
02:42Walk!
02:43No, stop!
02:44Walk!
02:44Stop, stop there, stop.
02:46Come back.
02:46Team, team, your life force energy is healthy, but you're wasting it.
02:52Right, go!
02:53Walk fast!
02:54Move, quickly!
02:55Go.
02:56Stop!
02:57Right.
02:59Right, walk.
03:00It doesn't seem to be good.
03:02Walk a bit.
03:03Walk!
03:03Walk a bit.
03:04Stop.
03:07Walk.
03:08No.
03:08Stop.
03:09Right, keep going.
03:10Keep going.
03:10Walk!
03:11Sit.
03:12Where am I?
03:13You're in a large grey room with a flight of steps in front of you.
03:18There's also a table platform with some key objects on, and there's a door on the right-hand wall.
03:27Right.
03:27Richard?
03:28Yeah?
03:28Do you see the steps?
03:30Yeah.
03:30Right, could you walk down the steps, please, carefully?
03:35Right, now, could you take...
03:37Well done, team.
03:38You appear to have reached the clue room for this level.
03:41I must warn you, however, that at this stage of the proceedings, things can be expected to get very tricky
03:47indeed.
03:49Almost every decision you take now will be critical as to your survival.
03:56Right.
03:56Richard?
03:57Yeah?
03:57Now, can you take three side steps to your right, please?
04:03Right, perfect.
04:04Could you walk forward now, please?
04:09Right, stop.
04:10Right, can you see a table?
04:12Yeah.
04:12Can you see the objects?
04:14Not yet.
04:15Could you...
04:15Go forward again.
04:16Hold on, I don't know where it is.
04:17Right.
04:18There's a key.
04:19Yeah.
04:20Some gold.
04:21Yeah.
04:21And a bell.
04:21Right, can you see them?
04:23Yeah.
04:23Right, is there anything on any...
04:24Could you pick up the gold?
04:26See if it's heavy.
04:27Right, is it heavy?
04:28Yeah.
04:29Right, is there any inscription on it or anything?
04:31There's a crown.
04:33A crown?
04:35Right.
04:35Could you put it back, please?
04:37Right, is there any other inscriptions or anything else?
04:40On the bell.
04:41Help!
04:41Help!
04:42Let me go!
04:43Let me go!
04:44I've been picked up, my strange person!
04:47Hey!
04:48Who do you think you are, anyway?
04:50Say, who are you?
04:51I'm a dungeoneer.
04:52Richard.
04:53Hey, what's your name?
04:54Richard.
04:55Richard?
04:56Look here.
04:57I'm Casper.
04:59Casper the key, that's me.
05:01Wow.
05:01Merlin made me talk because he kept forgetting where he'd put me, the dozy old sorcerer.
05:07Trouble is, it still doesn't help because he keeps leaving me out of earshot.
05:12Now, listen.
05:13I don't like to boast, but I'm the finest key in the world.
05:19I only have to look at a lock and it just opens.
05:21So remember, if you're taking me with you, hold me up before the lock to open doors where
05:28keyholes lurk.
05:30Yeah.
05:31I know it doesn't rhyme, but the old skinflint owner gave me a limited vocabulary.
05:35Anyway.
05:36I'm along for the ride, if you're willing.
05:39Yes.
05:40Yes.
05:40Richard, pick him up carefully.
05:42Yes.
05:43That's it.
05:44Right.
05:44And just hold it.
05:45Right.
05:45Just hold it.
05:46Right.
05:46Look at the bell.
05:47Ask him if there's any advice for the key.
05:49Right.
05:49Anything on the bell?
05:50Can you see anything on the bell?
05:54No.
05:55Oh, I can see.
05:56You're wasting light, boss.
05:57I can see fire, it says.
06:00Fire?
06:01Fire.
06:02Oh, fire.
06:03Right.
06:04Could you pick up the gold, do you think?
06:05No, the bell.
06:06I don't know.
06:07Shh.
06:07Er.
06:08Richard?
06:09Yeah?
06:09You'd better get a move on.
06:11Right.
06:11We'll take the gold.
06:12What do you think?
06:13No.
06:13The key, the bell one.
06:14Yes.
06:15All right.
06:15Could you pick up the bell?
06:17Yeah.
06:17Right.
06:18And turn right.
06:20Turn right.
06:21That's it.
06:22Now walk forward.
06:26Right.
06:27Turn right.
06:27Take a few side steps to the right.
06:30Three.
06:32Right.
06:32Keep going.
06:33Keep going.
06:34Keep going.
06:34Keep going.
06:34To the right.
06:35Come on, Richard.
06:35Come on.
06:36Right.
06:37Now walk forward.
06:38Run.
06:39Where am I?
06:40You're in a large room with four doors.
06:43Two have got portcullises on them.
06:46One's got a fire exit name above it.
06:49And one's got a lock in it.
06:51All right.
06:52Richard?
06:52Yeah?
06:53Could you take about three side steps to the right, please?
06:59Okay.
07:00Right.
07:00Yeah.
07:00Walk forward now, please.
07:02Just keep going.
07:03Just keep going.
07:03You're fine.
07:05Right.
07:05Stop.
07:06Easy.
07:07Easy.
07:08Easy.
07:09How about finding me something a bit more challenging?
07:13A key could get bored doing this sort of thing.
07:17Right.
07:18Hold up, Richard.
07:18Take a side step to the right, please.
07:20Quickly.
07:21Right.
07:21And walk forward.
07:24Hey, Richard.
07:25Hold up the key.
07:26You better hold me up.
07:27Yeah.
07:27Hold him up.
07:28Now walk forward.
07:29Richard.
07:30Right up above your head.
07:31Right up.
07:32That's right.
07:32That's better.
07:33Now walk forward.
07:34Keep going.
07:35You can put the key down.
07:36Where am I?
07:37Hello, Richard.
07:38Richard, you're in a room.
07:40It looks like, well, there's lots of books on the shelves.
07:44A study with a grand throne in the middle.
07:48Merlin.
07:48Merlin, yes.
07:50And there's an M on the chair.
07:51Richard has reached an enchanted place.
07:54And the presence of deep magic means that I am unable to offer you even the smallest
08:00of advice.
08:01In other words, you're on your own.
08:05Richard, there's an M on the chair and an M on the screen, which we think is for Merlin.
08:12I know where we are.
08:13I know where we are.
08:15Hey, listen up, Richard.
08:16Don't be dumb.
08:17Here's a place to have some fun.
08:19We all know I'm a talking key.
08:22Well, there are also listening keys.
08:24And there's one here.
08:25If you can spot it, it can't talk like me.
08:28But it can go where you want it to go.
08:30If you tell it, it can hear your friends, too.
08:34Just get them to address it as key.
08:37As for the lock, where?
08:39Anyone with half a brain can work that one out.
08:45Say key, Richard.
08:46Key.
08:52Richard, say to the key.
08:56Go into the seat.
08:57Go into the walk on the seat.
09:00Richard, yeah.
09:02Right.
09:04That's the key to go into the seat.
09:07Hey, Richard.
09:08Yeah.
09:09Try telling it to move.
09:11Key.
09:12Tell it to move, Richard.
09:13Say key to move.
09:14Say key move.
09:15Key move.
09:16You better tell it where you want to move it to.
09:18To the chair.
09:19To the chair.
09:20Move to the chair.
09:21Move to the chair.
09:22Hey.
09:23Key move to the chair.
09:24Tell it to move up or down.
09:25I don't think it knows where the chair is.
09:26Up.
09:28Up.
09:28Back.
09:28Stop.
09:29Stop.
09:30Stop.
09:30That's it.
09:31Now.
09:31Right.
09:32Right.
09:33Right.
09:34Stop.
09:36Back on.
09:36Who caught?
09:39Oh, it's a dungeoneer.
09:41How great.
09:42I thought they'd stop sending them after what happened to the last ones.
09:46Richard.
09:47Well then.
09:48What's your name, young sir?
09:50Richard the dungeoneer.
09:53Splendid.
09:54Well, my name is Merlin the Magnificent.
09:56But if you like, you can just call me Magnificent.
10:00Right.
10:01Now.
10:02What am I supposed to do?
10:04Oh, yes.
10:06You're going to need some magic, aren't you?
10:08Now.
10:08What sort of magic do you prefer?
10:10Offensive?
10:11Effective?
10:12Defensive?
10:12Or confusative?
10:15Well, we'll just have to see, won't we?
10:17The trouble with all magic is that there's a price to pay for gaining it.
10:21And sometimes a price to pay for using it.
10:25In this case, the price for gaining it is to convince me that you and your friends are wise enough
10:31to use it wisely.
10:33Answer me directly now with three truths, and I may yet be persuaded to arm you for survival.
10:40Here is the first.
10:44Ice and snow will make you cold.
10:48Centuries will make you old.
10:51Fire and water will make steam.
10:55But how on earth do you make green?
11:00Blue and yellow.
11:01Richard.
11:02Yeah.
11:02Can you say blue and yellow?
11:04Blue and yellow.
11:05Truth accepted.
11:07Here then is my second.
11:09What rolls but is not round, yet tells the score but speaks no sound?
11:22Well, I'm looking through a piece.
11:25Could you repeat that, please?
11:27How excessively tiresome.
11:28Very well.
11:31What rolls but is not round, yet tells the score but speaks no sound?
11:39Hey, Richard.
11:41Yeah?
11:42Think of something that's used in a game.
11:45Dice.
11:46Dice.
11:46Dice.
11:47Oh, dice.
11:48Truth accepted.
11:50Well done.
11:52Here is my third.
11:55As the eagle is to the sparrow, so is the great bird of legend to the condor.
12:01Only his memory survives.
12:05But can you remember his name?
12:10What is it?
12:11What do you think?
12:12Uh, Paul.
12:13Yes?
12:14I think it might be the dove, but I'm not so sure.
12:16So what shall I...
12:18The dove, but I'm not so sure.
12:19So what shall I say?
12:20Say dragon.
12:22No.
12:23Come on, just say it.
12:25The dove.
12:26Shall I say dove?
12:26No, because he's not still alive.
12:29Say dragon.
12:31Dragon.
12:32You sure?
12:33Yes.
12:34Yes.
12:34Dragon.
12:35Falsehood.
12:36Rock was the truth I sought.
12:39Rock.
12:41Two is the score.
12:43I will gift you one spell, but a potent one.
12:49It is called shield.
12:52Now, I must warn you.
12:54In the dungeon depths ahead resides Mogrid, my alter ego, and the dark side of my magic.
13:00Overcome him as you must, and we may yet meet again.
13:04Oh, leave Casper here, please.
13:06He can no longer aid you.
13:09And now, farewell.
13:13And good luck.
13:17Put Casper on the floor, please.
13:20Gently.
13:22Right, could you take a side step to the left?
13:24So you don't tread on him.
13:25Right, so you don't tread on him right now.
13:27Could you walk forward?
13:30Right, stop.
13:31Turn left.
13:33Left.
13:34That's it, and walk forward.
13:35Go forward.
13:36Walk forward, Richard.
13:39Where am I?
13:40You're in a cavern with a well and some food, I think, on the well, and a guard guarding the
13:48well and the food.
13:49Hold, intruder.
13:51The password now, or you perish.
13:56Richard, say cyclops.
13:57Cyclops.
13:59Password accepted.
14:02Pass, stranger.
14:04Right, Richard.
14:05But don't linger.
14:06I may have let you go, but I don't have to like you.
14:11Right.
14:11Right, Richard.
14:12Yeah, right.
14:13Walk forward, please.
14:14Sorry, we'll see where he's going.
14:15That's right.
14:16Right, stop.
14:18Now, could you turn right?
14:19That's it, and walk forward.
14:21To the well.
14:21To the well.
14:23Right, stop.
14:23Right, can you see the well?
14:25Yeah.
14:25Climb up the steps.
14:26Climb up two steps, the two steps.
14:29See some food.
14:29Can you see that food?
14:30Yeah.
14:30Put it in your knapsack.
14:32And climb into the well.
14:34Right, is there anything in the well?
14:35Anything, you know...
14:36Bad.
14:37Or is it empty?
14:38Just climb in.
14:40Climb in.
14:40Right, climb in.
14:41Go on.
14:42Get in.
14:43Go on.
14:44Get in, yeah.
14:47That's it.
14:48Take your knapsack with you.
14:50Right, duck right down.
14:54Where am I?
14:55You're in a large room with lots of skeletons about.
14:59There's a door on your left,
15:02and there's one a bit to the right of it.
15:05Warning, team.
15:07Cabin whites are common to all lower levels,
15:10but are endemic on level three.
15:12These are the remains of their feastings.
15:15The whites were once human,
15:16but now have no sight, speech, or hearing.
15:19They find their prey by smell,
15:21and they're always hungry.
15:24I strongly suggest you keep on the moon.
15:27Right, Richard.
15:28Could you, um, walk forward.
15:32Please stop.
15:32Stop.
15:33Right.
15:34Yeah, turn left, please.
15:36Right.
15:36Walk forward.
15:37Right, stop.
15:38Right, turn right.
15:39A bit.
15:40A bit.
15:40Stop, right.
15:41Walk forward.
15:43Right, stop.
15:45Turn left.
15:45A bit.
15:46A little bit.
15:47Walk forward.
15:48Right, stop.
15:49Turn right.
15:50A bit.
15:51Oh, no, not as much.
15:52Left a little bit.
15:53Right, walk forward.
15:56Where am I?
15:57You're at, uh, you're in a, uh, a, a big room,
16:03at the top of a flight of steps.
16:05There are two, um, doors on your right,
16:10and there's a table with some objects on.
16:13Right.
16:14Good answer.
16:15Could you walk down the stairs, please?
16:17Be careful.
16:19Right.
16:20Now, could you take, um, right?
16:24Could you turn right a little bit?
16:26That's it.
16:27Now, could you walk forward, please?
16:28Keep going.
16:28Just keep going.
16:30Right, stop.
16:31Right, could you turn right a little bit?
16:33Left.
16:33Just a little bit.
16:34Left.
16:35Left a little bit.
16:35Okay.
16:36Right, walk forward.
16:37Right.
16:38Can you see a table?
16:40Yeah.
16:40Right.
16:41What's that?
16:42A dagger.
16:43A grape.
16:43A dagger.
16:45Sniff.
16:45Sniff.
16:46One says sniff.
16:48Yes.
16:48Right, hold on.
16:49Right, could you, um, pick up the grapes
16:51and put them in your knapsack?
16:55Right.
16:55Now, we'll need the sniff.
16:58Right, pick up the bottle.
16:59Yes.
17:00Right.
17:01It says sniff.
17:03Oh, yeah.
17:04Um, can you see, what,
17:06is there anything on the horn or the dagger?
17:08Um,
17:11check the other side as well.
17:14I can't see anything on the dagger.
17:16What about the horn?
17:17No.
17:18Hurry up.
17:19Quickly.
17:20Now, take the dagger.
17:22Pick up the dagger then, please.
17:23And the snuff.
17:24And the snuff.
17:25Now, just put the holy grail on there, then.
17:28Hurry, team, you'll need your life force.
17:31Right, turn left.
17:32See, have a mic to bound.
17:34Right, round, round.
17:35Now, turn left.
17:36That's it.
17:37Now, walk forward.
17:39Right, now, turn left a bit.
17:41There.
17:41Yeah, walk forward.
17:42Go on.
17:43Keep going.
17:44Right, start.
17:44Turn right a bit.
17:45Turn right.
17:45A bit.
17:46Turn right.
17:47Right.
17:48Right.
17:49That's it.
17:49Walk forward.
17:50Right, left.
17:52Walk forward.
17:53Go.
17:55Where am I?
17:56You're in a large cavern.
17:59One, there are two exits.
18:02One's blocked up with all the boxes.
18:03Dire warning, team.
18:04Just as I feared.
18:06Here be cavern whites.
18:08Remember, Richard, they can neither see nor hear you, but they're already beginning to
18:12snip you out.
18:14Contact is deadly.
18:15Richard, open the bottle of perfume.
18:16Right, Richard, open the bottle of perfume.
18:19Now, put the stopper back in.
18:21Right.
18:22Now, take one step to the left.
18:25Right.
18:25Open it.
18:25Right.
18:26Take it off.
18:27Take the top off and put the bottle down on the floor.
18:29Down.
18:30Quickly.
18:31Now, now, walk forwards.
18:33Pass the bottle.
18:34Walk forward.
18:35Keep going.
18:35Run.
18:36Run.
18:37That's it.
18:38You're all right now.
18:38Now, turn right a little bit.
18:40A little bit.
18:41That's it.
18:41Now, walk forwards.
18:42Oh, quickly.
18:44Where am I?
18:45You're in a large room with a portcullis-covered door, and there's a large blue face of a monster.
18:51A dungeon here.
18:52This is a hazard I hoped you would avoid.
18:55You've heard no doubt of people falling into a pit of deep despair.
19:00Well, I'm afraid you've fallen into a pit of deep despair.
19:04The cause is present, so the rest of the team can observe it is a gargoyle.
19:09And, if I might say so, a particularly ugly gargoyle at that.
19:15Gargoyles close doors to prevent visitors because they're ashamed of their appearance.
19:20Unless you can cheer him up, you'll perish here.
19:25For his gloom is draining your life force at an unnatural rate.
19:30All I can tell you is that his name is Mug.
19:34Ugly Mug?
19:35That's what you mean.
19:37Well, go on.
19:38You might as well say it.
19:39I'm really ugly.
19:41Why?
19:42I'm so ugly, I make a toad's backside look beautiful.
19:48He's really handsome.
19:50He's really handsome.
19:52That's it.
19:52You're going to have to flatter him.
19:54I hear voices.
19:56Have you got friends?
19:58I haven't got any friends.
19:59Hello.
20:00You must have plenty of friends.
20:02Everyone likes you.
20:03So, we're your friends.
20:03We're your friends.
20:04Everyone likes you.
20:06I think my mood is lifting a bit, but I'm still blue.
20:11Are you sure I'm not ugly?
20:14Well, you look better than me.
20:15You're more handsome than anybody.
20:17That's right, keep it up, keep it up.
20:19You're the most beautiful creature that I've ever met.
20:21Oh, I know this sounds silly, but I think my optimism is starting to return.
20:27Tell me more, please.
20:29Do you like my nose?
20:31Of course.
20:32Of course.
20:32Yes, it's beautiful.
20:33What do you think?
20:34Best nose I've ever seen.
20:35What about my eyes?
20:36Do you like the color?
20:38Beautiful.
20:38Yes, it's a beautiful color.
20:40I love that color best.
20:41I do feel good.
20:43And as they say, when you're feeling good, you're looking good.
20:47I think I'll have a party next week.
20:49You know, just me and a few admirers.
20:51Oh, I'm ever so grateful to you.
20:53So, I think I'll gift you a spell.
20:56Someone gave it to me years ago, but it wouldn't work for me.
21:00It's called Opposite.
21:03And now it's yours.
21:04Well done, team.
21:06But don't linger.
21:07He could stay like this for centuries, but he's just as likely to have a sudden relapse
21:11and start sulking again.
21:13Open the door.
21:14Yes.
21:14As quick as he can.
21:14Hey, could...
21:15He's opened it.
21:16Right, Richard.
21:17Yeah.
21:17Could you take one side step to the right, please?
21:20Right.
21:20Now, could you walk forward, please?
21:22Quickly.
21:23Quickly.
21:24Keep going.
21:25Right.
21:25Stop.
21:26Turn 90 degrees to your left.
21:29Right.
21:29Walk forward, please.
21:30Run.
21:31Run.
21:34Where am I?
21:36You're in the...
21:36Warning, team.
21:37Lifeforce energy very low.
21:41You're in a large room with a wall in front of you.
21:44On the wall, it says Jericho with the number six.
21:49There's a door at the other side of the wall, but I can't see it.
21:54Much more.
21:55Yes.
21:56Good.
21:57Right, Richard, could you walk forwards a few steps?
22:01We needed the horn.
22:02Right, can you see a wall?
22:04Yeah.
22:05Yeah.
22:05Could you hold up the dagger?
22:08Why are you carrying a weapon of so little use to one who's blindfold?
22:13Where is the horn to bring down the walls of Jericho?
22:24Oh, dear.
22:26What a pity.
22:27Never mind.
22:28Richard, it seems, has fallen at what may well have been the final hurdle.
22:33And now it's time for you to join him.
22:37Spellcasting.
22:38D-I-S-M-I-S-S.
22:46Hail, Richard, Jonathan, Edward, and Paul.
22:50The dungeon salutes you.
22:52This phase of the dungeon is now over, but it was you who came closest to victory.
22:58And so you are our champions.
23:01And as for those who merely watch, now you must wait while the dungeon shifts to another phase.
23:09When will the challenge come?
23:12Who knows?
23:13But remember, when the fire burns, the nightmare returns.
23:32Fancy a bit of free interactive action?
23:34Then if you're a Sky Digital dude, you can press red and play along for free with Bruce's Price is
23:40Right coming at you after the break.
23:42We've also got Classic Who Wants to Be a Millionaire at 9 o'clock tonight here on Challenge.