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TVTranscript
00:00Does Barrow Creek get many body parts lodged inside dead reptiles?
00:04Blunt has made the wrong ID on that arm. I can feel it.
00:08I think we've got a John Doe on our hands.
00:09It's not a croc bite.
00:11That's been chopped off.
00:12Now we're looking for a missing person and a fucking killer.
00:15We?
00:16Yes, yes, fucking yes.
00:18If I can identify the croc from the river, then we find our killer.
00:21The Daryl's pet croc king is still alive.
00:24So I've got one more place to check out.
00:25What are you doing here?
00:26He's dead.
00:27Triple bed.
00:28The best croc in the territory must have been who was dead in the river.
00:33Get down, get down!
00:34Nah, he's not gonna shoot us.
00:36He's my fucking dad!
00:37Is that your cock and balls on my dad's face?
00:39Respect my dad!
00:40He's the king of the river!
00:42Fuck!
00:43Fuck!
00:57Fuck!
01:06Fuck!
01:08Fuck!
01:13Fuck!
01:14Nah, we've got more chance of finding a shit with wings than more of Don Daryl's body tonight.
01:18Some croc's probably tucked him away like a drag queen's dick by now.
01:23Or I'd say he's been eating already.
01:29What? What?
01:30Were you ever gonna tell me that your dad lives in Barrow Creek?
01:33Here we go.
01:34Well, you specifically said that you have no family here, Eddie.
01:37Yeah, because I thought he was in jail.
01:39Well, feel free to tell me about your hometown while we are investigating a case in your hometown
01:44so I don't make a complete git of myself.
01:47Well, you're doing a pretty good job of that yourself by now.
01:49Oh, the glasses are for motion sickness.
01:52Mate, who cares who kept what from who, okay?
01:55We're trying to solve a high-profile murder here.
01:57Yeah, that's exactly what I'm saying.
01:59So tomorrow morning we hit the ground running, get his autopsy report and we fingerprint his cage.
02:03What? Who's cage?
02:05Triple pet, my crocodile.
02:07Eddie, we are investigating a homicide.
02:09This is a fucking homicide.
02:10Hom means human.
02:11Right, now I'd like to say a few words about triple pet and my crocodile brother.
02:16Please don't.
02:17Triple pet.
02:17Please no.
02:18You loved eating.
02:21Specifically pets, three of them to be exact.
02:23And I know we had our challenges.
02:26I accidentally shot off three of your scutes with a slug gun and you tried to eat me a lot.
02:30But you were my best mate.
02:31And I solemnly vowed to find your killer and avenge your death and so does Collins.
02:34No, I don't.
02:35And now, for your favourite song.
02:37Oh, can I sing it for you?
02:38Cracklin' Rose, you're a starboard woman.
02:42But you make me sing like a guitar humming.
02:46So hang on to me, girl.
02:48The song keeps playing on.
02:51Play now.
02:52Play now.
02:53Please stop moving your bottom.
02:55It is jiggling the boat, Eddie.
02:56BAM!
02:57BAM!
03:04BAM!
03:08BAM!
03:10BAM!
03:20BAM!
03:22BAM!
03:24BAM!
03:26BAM!
03:27BAM!
03:28BAM!
03:29There.
03:29That was a silly ball last night.
03:32Hey.
03:32And Don's death is no excuse for you to kick off it in there.
03:36Let's get this right on the show, shall we?
03:39Wait, wait, wait.
03:40What's with this get up?
03:41You look like a beachy mortician.
03:43You need to get involved with this, mate.
03:45100% petroleum, moisture wicking, hammerhead, shark on the back.
03:49Okay, yep.
03:50Wowee, yep.
03:52Not as good as Bushy Shirt, eh?
03:54Oh, hey, you just seen that one?
03:56Fucking bull crock on the front, helicopter on the back, double the action, you know?
04:01I don't.
04:01So, any word on Don's autopsy?
04:04Uh, no.
04:05Apparently, forensics are busy, but we'll head to Darwin once the autopsy's confirmed.
04:09Okay.
04:09When do we meet our team?
04:10Uh, there is no team.
04:12All personnel have been diverted to Task Force Homare for the backpacker case.
04:16My loves!
04:17Hi.
04:18I bought us new drink bottles.
04:19I've taped the What Color Is Your Piss Dehydration Guide on the site.
04:22Yeah, good on you, Kat.
04:24Eddie, I'm so glad you're here reconnecting with your dad.
04:26No, I'm not.
04:27Such a beautiful experience.
04:28No, it's not.
04:29Thank you for letting us be part of it.
04:30No, Kat.
04:31No.
04:32Yeah.
04:32Get out of the way.
04:33Fucking old scroed up to now.
04:35Hold that.
04:35I'm gonna talk to him about tripping then.
04:37Okay, my love.
04:38I'm going to a camping store to buy us a family piss bucket.
04:41Oi!
04:41Why are you still here?
04:43Well, I thought we could reconnect.
04:45Have a nice cup of Makona.
04:46I'm investigating the Don Darrell homicide, dickhead.
04:49I don't think you fucking talk to me about Don Darrell.
04:51He's fucking dead to me.
04:53I'll tell you what.
04:54If you had one dram of fucking loyalty and you'd be fucking dead to you too.
04:58He is dead to me.
04:59He's fucking dead to everybody because he's fucking dead.
05:01What did you do with Triple Pet?
05:03Well, you got tits for airs.
05:05I told you last night somebody stole him.
05:07Oh, really?
05:07Okay.
05:08Yeah?
05:08And that's how he wound up dead in the river with Don Darrell's arm in his mouth?
05:12What are you on about, girl?
05:13That's not Triple Pet.
05:14Look at the bums on top of its head.
05:16That croc's got all his goose.
05:17Triple Pet's got half his missing.
05:19And we both know how that happens.
05:21Shit shot.
05:22So where's Triple Pet then?
05:23I don't bloody know.
05:25Come on.
05:26Not this asshole again.
05:27Get fucked, Hobbacan.
05:28Hey, you Hobbacan.
05:29Bang, hi.
05:33Hello.
05:34I'm, um, I'm Dulcie.
05:36I didn't get a chance to meet properly when you were shooting at us.
05:40Yeah, I know about you.
05:41Have a look at the barry, eh?
05:43Shetland pony and a lesbian giraffe.
05:45It's like a fucking Disney film come to life.
05:49Good luck for the case at Wiener.
05:51You're off to a fucking flyer so far.
06:01This building used to be the old school.
06:03Eddie would remember that, wouldn't you?
06:05Yep.
06:05Oh, yeah.
06:06So anyway, here's the keys to your vehicle.
06:08Alright, that's on loan from the boys at the Dierks River Station.
06:11So I'd give it a wipe down if I was you.
06:14Ah.
06:14The kitchen, just over here.
06:17Bathroom's out the back.
06:18The toilet is non-load bearing.
06:20So just hover over the top of it like you're riding an invisible motorbike.
06:25That's it.
06:25Just make yourselves at home.
06:27I'm retiring next week.
06:29Oh.
06:29So I'm doing the handover with my replacement.
06:32So far it's been like hand-rearing a baby duck.
06:35Senior Sergeant Heffernan?
06:36Oh, speak of the devil.
06:38Ah, detectives, this is the incoming Barrow Creek Sergeant Luke Ferguson.
06:42Hey, I know you.
06:44Used to work at HQ.
06:45Bush, you put his dick in your yoga that time, remember that?
06:48I do.
06:49I do remember that.
06:50Hey, you still making that hand-brew?
06:51Stuff that tastes like a banana pissed itself.
06:54It was tropical sour.
06:55Oh yeah, it was potent.
06:57Couldn't stop pissing brown for a week.
06:59What's the deal with the mean boot, mean boot?
07:01I had a procedure done on my plantar fasciitis.
07:04The Don Darrell autopsy report's taking an awfully long time to print.
07:07Sorry, the autopsy's been done already?
07:09Yes, and it's taking a very long time to print.
07:12Okay.
07:12We'll just bring it in to the detectives when it's done, Luke.
07:15Oh, I can't do that, Senior Sergeant.
07:17You are supposed to be taking me through the emergency SOPs all the way through to lunchtime.
07:21I'm only rostered on until 3pm.
07:23It'll be overtime after that.
07:24Yeah, okay.
07:25Okay.
07:26Yep.
07:27Jeez, if the weather doesn't do me in, that boy will.
07:30Just hold tight.
07:31Right, you've got to open the tray and then you've just got to...
07:35What kind of backyard forensics office does an autopsy without informing the detectives
07:39in charge?
07:40It's territory forensics, mate.
07:41Pretty much just three blokes and a Commodore 64.
07:44You've just got to be firm with this.
07:46I've been your sergeant.
07:47Yes.
07:47Oh, great.
07:47Coming, Luke.
07:48No, with the down light, too slow.
07:51Weapon used in the post-mortem disarticulation of D. Darrell is a weapon with a cutting edge
07:59attached to a handle or hilt.
08:02So...
08:02It's a knife.
08:03That's a knife.
08:03That's right.
08:05So...
08:05His head and arm were removed after death.
08:08What else does it say?
08:09That's just it.
08:10The knife bit.
08:11What?
08:12That's not...
08:12No, it's not.
08:13It is.
08:13No, what about the time of death or the cause of death?
08:17Is there a tox report?
08:19Cause of death unknown.
08:20Yeah, and they need the torso.
08:21It's got all the vital organs, the heart, the lungs, the bum and the boobs.
08:24Sure, but this isn't a forensics report.
08:26This is a book blurb.
08:28Forget about it.
08:28We'll figure this out some other way.
08:30Forensics is a crutch for you anyway.
08:31Come on, let's just go to the Darrells.
08:32Shake their shorts, see what turds fall out.
08:35Come on, you can drive.
08:36I will.
08:37Oh, can I?
08:38Oh, Eddie, in interviews we refer to Don's death as a fishing accident.
08:42No mention we're treating it as a murder.
08:44I know.
08:44I'll be confidential as fuck, mate.
08:46I always am.
08:48Hi.
08:48Fuck.
08:49Pat was going to give me a quote about Don Darrell and then forgot about me.
08:52I heard everything you said.
08:55You're a fucking journo?
08:57Yes, I'm Leo Lear.
08:58I write the NT Times Daily Crock Watch column.
09:00Right.
09:00Well, obviously I'm a fan, but if you print anything we just said, I'll do you for perverting
09:05the course of justice, okay?
09:06That's not the charge for that.
09:07Just keep your hold shut.
09:09Okay, but I'm a trained journalist, so you should let me investigate with you.
09:11I'm dangerously bored in my job.
09:13I've written the same weekly crock attack article for months now and not one person's noticed.
09:16Leo, your help with the crime scene photos was appreciated, but I am running a professional
09:21investigation here, so thank you and no thank you and goodbye, please.
09:27There's a recycling bin.
09:28Yes.
09:29Okay, thank you.
09:30Car.
09:30Oi!
09:30Ready!
09:31That bike, that's not yours.
09:33Who on are you?
09:34Yes, it's Mickey.
09:35Hi Aunty.
09:36Don't call her Aunty Bub, she not black.
09:38Yes, she is.
09:39Did you pretend to be black to take my 10 year olds bike?
09:42No.
09:43And I didn't take the bike.
09:44Yeah, she paid me $120 to hire it for three days.
09:47Cash?
09:48Yes, so you can pay to get Uncle Al's boat fix.
09:50Yeah, because I put dog biscuits in the field tank.
09:53Right, well, what?
09:53I'll turn it in good condition and pump up the tyres.
09:56Come on, let's go.
09:57Wait, wait, wait, Miffy.
09:59You're a ranger, yeah?
10:01So my crocodile brother triple pet's gone missing.
10:03Have you seen him in the area?
10:05Listen, Blue Heelers, if you want my ancestral knowledge and my professional expertise for
10:08your police investigation, then you can contact my boss Keith, Keith can contact me
10:12and I can tell Keith to fuck right off.
10:14Here you go.
10:15Your sonny's.
10:17All right, come on you lot.
10:19Aunty Mary said you can collect some cans at the pub while I'm at work today.
10:22Love the school holidays.
10:23Come on, Mub.
10:24How many cans do we need?
10:26That ranger's a bit of a punish.
10:29Freaky eyes.
10:30Too many fucking colours if you ask me.
10:32Looks like a poisonous frog.
10:34We don't need the bike, Eddie.
10:36We have the car.
10:36We have an adult car now, so...
10:38I've still got five hours left on the rental.
10:39Let's just go.
10:40No worries.
10:40I'm going to be a human map.
10:42Oh my god!
10:44I don't want to go!
10:45I don't want to go!
10:47I don't want to go!
10:48It's okay!
10:49It's okay!
10:49It's okay!
10:53It's okay!
10:55Right, so when we get there, I'll take a lead with the darrows.
10:58Really?
10:59You think that's wise?
11:00And we're all but kneecapped you last night.
11:02At least I'm a local, mate.
11:03You stick rich.
11:04I'll look at you and then they'll know you play the oboe
11:07and you're terrified of arse playing.
11:10It was the clarinet, actually.
11:13Oh, it's the superintendent.
11:15Believe it, we're almost there.
11:17Superintendent!
11:18Ah, detective.
11:19I'm just out for a lux, huh?
11:20Thought I'd give you a call, see how you got on this morning.
11:22Well, we've just arrived at the Daryl's now, sir,
11:25so hopefully we can question all of the family members,
11:27get them to piece together a picture of Don's final hours.
11:29Okay, and how's Detective Redcliffe getting on?
11:36Ah, really, really great, actually,
11:38but she'd like a therapy puppet.
11:40Would she?
11:41Really?
11:41A puppet?
11:42Okay, to each their own.
11:43I'll let HR know.
11:45They'll be wrapped.
11:46I'm doing too many things here.
11:48Oh, actually, sir, we could use your assistance with forensics.
11:52Don Daryl's autopsy report was all of eight words.
11:54They didn't give us a cause of death.
11:56Now, we appreciate that they need more body parts,
11:59but we expected a bit more information.
12:01Yeah, well, that sounds about right, Detective.
12:03Look, I'll make some calls,
12:05see if I can't unblock a few of those evidence pipelines for you.
12:08Thank you, sir,
12:08and we'll do some old-fashioned pavement pounding till then.
12:13All right, I'll leave you to it.
12:14Okay, bye for now.
12:17Hey, um, no jokes when we go in there.
12:20They don't work for you.
12:22It's like a cheese string on a knotter.
12:27Yeah, so, um, straight out of the bat,
12:30we offer our condoles,
12:32and, um, I just want to say how sorry we both are.
12:37Don was, uh, a legend,
12:41a river king,
12:45a sultan of swing.
12:47Shove it up, you clack!
12:48Dad'd be rolling in his grave to know you were here.
12:50Well, he's not in a grave, he's his own.
12:52My C-section's healed, shithead!
12:54I will go, you!
12:54Hang on, stop your ride!
12:56It's a statement of fact, okay?
12:57Fine, he's mainly in the river.
12:58Fuck, fine, you go.
13:00Um, uh, uh, Miss, uh, Miss Daryl, Mrs. Daryl,
13:04we just want to ask a few questions
13:07about Don's last movements.
13:08How would we know his last movements?
13:10We didn't follow him to the shitter.
13:11No, sorry, I meant what he was doing before he died.
13:14Well, say that then, Scrabble.
13:16You think you're better than me?
13:17No, I never, I don't.
13:18And I'm a missus, not a miz.
13:19I'm married to Grant.
13:20That's my husband there.
13:21That's, oh.
13:23Oh, that's...
13:25Congratulations.
13:26Um, so when was the last time you saw Don?
13:29Why?
13:29What's it to you?
13:30How fucking dare you?
13:31I am just trying to do my job.
13:35Last time we saw Dad was...
13:38It was Sunday night!
13:40Sunday night.
13:40The whole family had tea at the pub.
13:43You happy?
13:44So you didn't see him on Monday then?
13:45If we'd seen him then, we would've fucking said...
13:47Tegan, can you get the phone?
13:49So, the last time you saw Don was Sunday night.
13:52Okay, and...
13:52Oh, no, no, no.
13:53She can't.
13:54Oh, sorry, we are conducting a police interview.
13:56You can't just...
13:56She's my best friend.
13:58Tegan was my mate of honour.
14:00Okay?
14:01It's a funeral already, ma'am's.
14:03Okay?
14:03Well, you tell him, Tegs, that we're not paying for a full-sized coffin.
14:06We only got the head and the arm, so we'll just do a dog one.
14:09For shit sakes, Amber!
14:10Stop going on about bloody money!
14:11Well, someone's got her mum.
14:13DJ won't, will he?
14:14He just bought a fucking duck boat.
14:16Tell him, Tegs.
14:17Hey, they're JJ.
14:18You've got my bracelet.
14:19Boys don't play with bracelets.
14:20It's gay.
14:21Okay, so the meal at the pub on Sunday, was everyone in good spirits?
14:26What's it to you?
14:27Yes.
14:28Do people who aren't in good spirits do three rounds of crock-sucking cowboys?
14:31It was a lovely night.
14:32It was a lovely night.
14:32How dare you?
14:33Oh.
14:34Okay.
14:37Who are they from, Troy?
14:41Dear Colleen, Amber, DJ and Trey.
14:45Troy!
14:46That's you.
14:47Troy.
14:48Sorry for your loss.
14:50Deepest symphonies.
14:51Jason Wade.
14:53That dickrat.
14:54The bloody dude.
14:56Troy, you take those birds of paradise out the back and you burn them in the incinerator.
15:03Wow.
15:04So what happened after dinner?
15:05Dad got eaten by a fucking crocodile.
15:07Girl knows that, Amber.
15:08No, sorry.
15:08Actually, I meant what time did you all leave the pub?
15:15It's none of your business, but Dad stayed at the pub and then we all left about 10.
15:20We dropped DJ and Troy back here and then Mum come back to ours because all our kids had
15:24both ends gastro.
15:25We were just swapping out buckets till 5am.
15:27Fucking awful.
15:28Yeah, something would throw on.
15:29It's probably that woman's nuggets.
15:30And where did Don go after the pub?
15:33Probably headed home.
15:34Okay.
15:35And did he make it home?
15:36Did Troy or your other son BJ see him here?
15:39DJ.
15:40Don Junior.
15:41How dare you?
15:42DJ.
15:43Sorry.
15:43My bad.
15:43Yeah, you're not listening to a word we're saying.
15:45No one saw him after the pub.
15:47We already said that.
15:48Right, we're done here.
15:50I've lost my dad.
15:51DJJ's lost his pop.
15:52Mum's lost the love of her life.
15:54What about a gut fool?
15:55Yeah, we still need to talk to DJ.
15:56DJ.
15:57DJ's not here.
15:58He's taking it hard.
15:59He was Don's favourite.
16:01Well, tell him we want a word.
16:03Okay.
16:03Come on, Colin.
16:04Let's go.
16:05Oh.
16:06Actually, I do just have one more question.
16:08No, you don't.
16:09Yes, I do.
16:09By the time that Don's remains were found on Tuesday, you hadn't seen him for two days?
16:16Where did you think he was?
16:18Fishing.
16:18Right, and what makes you think that he was fishing?
16:21Because on Sunday night he told us he was going fishing.
16:24And you weren't worried about him?
16:25No.
16:26We're not like you city people.
16:28We can go weeks without talking to each other.
16:31It's called being a family.
16:34Right.
16:34Well, that feels like it's here to a natural conclusion.
16:37Uh, great.
16:38We will be in...
16:40Yes.
16:41Joy!
16:42Fire!
16:43Fuck!
16:44Bloody hell!
16:45Shit!
16:45Get up your amazing cunt, there's a fire!
16:47Get the hose!
16:49Get the hose!
16:50Get the hose!
16:50I know where the fucking hose is.
16:51Fuck!
16:54Okay.
16:54We'll question the locals about Sunday night.
16:56You just sit in the corner and try not to dog it up again, Scruttle.
16:59Oh.
17:02Come on, you three.
17:03Cut the shit.
17:04I know you know what fucking went on on Sunday night.
17:07Your asses have been planted here since 1983.
17:10What about you, Rabbit?
17:11Did you see Don Darrell on Sunday night?
17:14Bert?
17:14Did you see Don, huh?
17:17Rog, what about you?
17:18I didn't see anything pertaining to Don Darrell Edwina.
17:21I'll tell you what I did see recently, though.
17:23Lights in the sky over the DRR.
17:25Oh, yeah.
17:26Extraterrestrial activity is increasing exponentially.
17:29No, no, no.
17:29No cooker shit, Rog, okay?
17:31Answer my questions or I'll sign you up for a government ID.
17:33Hey.
17:34Well, one today, boys.
17:35No, don't start that.
17:36Don't start that.
17:37Don't start that.
17:38Don't start that.
17:39Fuck my hole.
17:40Okay.
17:41You boys keep going.
17:42Your government says the DRR is decommissioned military now.
17:45They're doing something out there and they're doing it with my taxes.
17:48Ben, you don't pay taxes, Rog.
17:49And this is why.
17:50That's my man.
17:51Fuck the colony, babe.
17:52Uh-huh.
17:52Oh, this is beautiful.
17:54Because my muse is beautiful.
17:56Oh.
17:58Those aliens are probably behind all this.
18:00I've probably got triple pet too.
18:01No.
18:01Hi, boys.
18:02Hot one today.
18:03Shut up, Joy.
18:05Stay out of it, Joy.
18:06Fuck's sake.
18:08Yeah, the Daryls were here on Sunday night for Don 70th.
18:10The kids ate five dozen nuggets.
18:12Don 70th?
18:14Well, why didn't they mention that?
18:15Ah, don't take it personally, Darcy.
18:17The Daryls probably just didn't tell you about Don's party because it's none of your business.
18:22Here we are.
18:24Oh.
18:25Mary?
18:26Yeah?
18:27I thought you cleaned up in here.
18:29No, I remember you were cleaning.
18:31I was digging.
18:32Uh, oh.
18:33Don didn't even finish his steak cake.
18:35Oh, get the karcher and pressure hose the lot of it out the roller door.
18:38Uh, just leave the mess for now, thank you, please.
18:40Okay, but we've got to clean it soon.
18:42Pat's having a retirement due in here next week.
18:57Uh, Mary, did the Daryls have a fight?
19:02Yeah.
19:021982, Tyndall Base.
19:0342.7 degrees, but this is hotter.
19:07Okay, okay.
19:08Okay, let's get back to Don Daryl or I will kill you all.
19:12We were at the Daryls yesterday.
19:14We fed King.
19:15Okay, that's it.
19:16Line up.
19:17You're all gonna die.
19:18See?
19:18Line up, I'm gonna shoot you up.
19:19Hi.
19:20Ron chucked a chook.
19:22Jesus.
19:22Did you slide in on wheels?
19:24No, I've been here this whole time, again.
19:26If you want to know what happened that evening, the drone was filming around the pub on Sunday
19:29night.
19:29I know because I stay in a caravan out back that barely has a roof.
19:33If you got your hands on the drone, it might have filmed Don leaving.
19:36Who owns a drone?
19:37Not sure, maybe Satan.
19:39The croc in this cage isn't king.
19:41What?
19:41This is not king.
19:42This croc is missing its skirts.
19:51Shit house rats.
19:59Gets all around, he's gone.
20:07He's on the floor.
20:08Carlins, where are you?
20:10In here.
20:11I know we're having a triple pen.
20:16Troy did the penis on the billboard.
20:23Hey!
20:25Hey!!
20:26Hey!
20:26Hey!
20:27Get back, the boat, the track boat!
20:29Go!
20:30Go!
20:32Go!
20:34Go!
20:36Go!
20:36Go!
20:36DJ the cock!
20:38I know what you two been up to!
20:39You get down, you crock-napping fuckers!
20:41Do not make me chase you!
20:43That crock in King's cage, that's triple-pet, isn't it?
20:46So that means it was king in the river with your dad's arm in a giant split-up!
20:50Get up!
20:51Don't follow me!
20:52Troy, do not jump if there is no give in the gravel none, mate!
20:57I told you that it hurt!
21:00We need to question you formally!
21:03Get out of here!
21:04Get out of here!
21:05Get out of here!
21:06Come on, Sprat!
21:07You think you can take your Sprat?
21:08Come on!
21:09Wanna take the alcohol?
21:10Troy!
21:11Oh, my God!
21:13Dismount the tiny bike!
21:16Fuck!
21:17Get off, Troy!
21:20Fuck, no!
21:22We didn't do nothing!
21:25I didn't do nothing!
21:40I found this at the pub today.
21:44Troy, did you graffiti the same penis and testes onto your father's face?
21:49What?
21:50On the billboard?
21:51No, that was those Landa Crocs wankers!
21:53Yeah, it was me.
21:55What?
21:56You dick and ball of dad's face!
21:57Hey!
21:58DJ!
21:59DJ!
21:59No!
22:00Hey, you got that!
22:03I was angry at him.
22:05Troy, mate, come on.
22:06Look at me.
22:08Dads can be tough, yeah?
22:10We know that.
22:11You know, weight of expectation.
22:14It's a lot.
22:14Yeah?
22:15Collins.
22:16Her dad.
22:17He was shit.
22:18He was an actor.
22:19He was in Brigadoon.
22:20Uh, no.
22:21He was a brigadier in the Defence Force.
22:23The point is, she understands why you'd want your dad dead, so...
22:27No, no, no.
22:28Yeah, yeah, no.
22:29You had a fight with your dad at the pub because of your gay dickhead.
22:33No, the fight was because Dad fed Grant Crabb and then his throat closed over.
22:37Yeah, Dad says allergies for poofs.
22:39Yeah, for poofs.
22:39Yeah, okay, whatever.
22:40Then after that, you killed your dad, you fed his arm to King, your prehistoric garbage disposal.
22:44That's not what happened.
22:45Yeah, and then King died because he choked on that arm, so you tucked him in the river.
22:49No, King was already, he was already in the river.
22:52No, what?
22:53Sorry, King was already in the river.
22:55Yeah, yeah, King got out Saturday night.
22:57The gate was open.
22:58That's why we nicked Triple Pet.
22:59We thought Frank was still in jail.
23:01Dad, yeah, is it our fault that Dad's dead?
23:03Yeah, Troy.
23:04King got out.
23:06Hey, right, and then, and then King ate Dad when Dad fell in the river, man.
23:09It's a fucking circle of life shit.
23:11King murdered Dad because we left the gate open.
23:14Ponds.
23:15These two fuckspanners don't know how don't die.
23:18Agreed.
23:19Hey!
23:19Fuck yeah!
23:20Troy!
23:21That's enough, DJ!
23:22Shut up!
23:23Hey!
23:24Where did you two go after the pub on Sunday night?
23:27Home.
23:27Went home.
23:28Home.
23:28He was on his thing.
23:29Twitch.
23:30Troy was on his Twitch and I went out with Rabbit setting off some fireworks.
23:34Look, I've got the videos on my socials to prove it.
23:36Look, look.
23:37Fifteen blowjobs all in a row.
23:39Oh, no thank you.
23:39No, no fellatio.
23:40No, no.
23:41They're a type of firework.
23:42What?
23:43Yeah.
23:44Like this.
23:44Okay, right.
23:45Wait, hang on.
23:46What?
23:46They're our confiscated fireworks, Troy.
23:48Grab them.
23:48No, no.
23:49Concentrate please.
23:49So did you see your Dad at all?
23:51He was due back at your place after the pub, yes?
23:54No.
23:55No, Dad went to his place.
23:57Is it his place?
23:58I'm not following, no.
23:59He was going to his place.
24:00Yes, but isn't his place your place?
24:02No.
24:03It's our place.
24:04Well, where the fuck is his place then?
24:05Dad's Donger.
24:06Dad went to Dad's Donger.
24:11You're on Top End Hot Hits with Beefy and the Skid, where the mango madness is setting
24:15in Skiddy.
24:16That's right, Beefy.
24:17And big news, Toby the Cadaver Dog has joined the missing backpacker search, just in time
24:21for Jason Wade's Big Barabash Nanza, which kicks off tomorrow in Jerk's River.
24:26Maybe Toby will have time to dip a rod in Skiddy.
24:28Maybe, maybe.
24:30Ha ha ha.
24:31Ha ha ha ha.
24:45No.
24:46Come on.
24:47No.
24:48Why the fuck not?
24:49Superintendent confirmed forensics is en route and the Donger is on the street.
24:53It's a portable building, soft G.
24:55Roll the N and the G.
24:56Dong.
24:57However you pronounce it, it is a suspected crime scene,
25:00so we wait for them.
25:02No, we make our own destiny. I'm going in.
25:04No, like fun you are.
25:05Ugh.
25:06We don't have gloves, we don't have booties,
25:08and it's all potential evidence in there.
25:10No.
25:10OK, well, I'm going to get Leo to bring us booties.
25:13Leo?
25:14Yeah, the journo. Tell me about the drone.
25:16Why would Leo bring us booties?
25:18Well, they were in the shower block when I was doing my bedtime bog block,
25:20so I asked them to help us with this.
25:21No, no, no, they won't.
25:22A journalist is not joining this investigation.
25:26God, Eddie, you should have checked with me first.
25:28No, fire them. Pay them out if you have to.
25:30No, I'm not paying them, that's the good thing.
25:31They just want first dibs on the story so they can turn it into a podcast.
25:35The... what?
25:36Collins, we need more hands, OK?
25:38Between the two of us, we've got four hands,
25:40but none of them know how to turn on a computer.
25:41Leo can handle that for us.
25:43But they've got this vibe where they barely exist.
25:46Like, people don't even notice when they're being interviewed by them.
25:49They think it's the wind.
25:51Hey, hey, Eddie, don't open that.
25:53I said we were waiting.
25:55Oh, I forgot.
25:58Ah.
26:00Considering that Daryl's place looked like the BFG's junk drawer,
26:05Don kept a remarkably clean dongler.
26:08Donger. It's donger.
26:09That's what I said.
26:12Why?
26:14Is it just me, or is this place on a lean?
26:19No, you're right, it is on a lean.
26:21I'm going to dip a toe in.
26:22No, don't.
26:23Just a toe.
26:24Just a fucking quantitative...
26:25Oh, fucking finally, cunts.
26:27Eddie.
26:28Where have you Jeans Biscuits been?
26:29Language.
26:30Got a hard-on for your swabs.
26:31Despite the hands, this is a workplace.
26:33I've got a semi.
26:34I've got a semi for your swap.
26:35Hello.
26:37We didn't go in.
26:41Hi, ma'ams.
26:42Ah.
26:43G'day, you guys.
26:50I'm struggling with these, Lynn.
26:51Just use a hook grip, Mayor.
26:53Hi, Lynn.
26:54Oh, hi, Kath.
26:55Hi, Mary.
26:55Oh, hi, Kath.
26:56Yep.
26:57You look busy.
26:58Yep.
26:58Always got something to do.
27:00I don't think it'll all dissolve in this.
27:03Oh, hello.
27:04Where did you come from?
27:06Good boy.
27:06Hi.
27:08Oh.
27:08I've got a new fishing shirt.
27:10And a loose tooth as well.
27:12Loose tooth?
27:13Wow.
27:14Is this your dog?
27:15Oh, she's in Cherry's dog, miss.
27:17Nah, it's Mav's dog, eh?
27:18Found him on the highway, eh?
27:19Oi, cool car, miss.
27:20Mav loves cars.
27:22He stole one once.
27:22Shut up, Cherry.
27:23Oh, I stole Simon Crean's car once.
27:26It was a uni grassroots gorilla thing to protest speed regulation.
27:30It didn't work.
27:32Can I get a hurricane drink from McCullough?
27:34Uh, yeah.
27:36Sure we can.
27:37Arnie!
27:38She's taking us to Ladder Crocs to see Uncle Al.
27:41Oh, good on you, Kath.
27:43I was running out of cans for them to collect.
27:45Cool, I'm in the front.
27:46Come on, boss.
27:46Thanks, miss.
27:47Oh, Sik, he's got touch screens.
27:49Yeah, sure.
27:51This'll be fun.
27:53Where are we going again?
27:55Kay put me up for this uni placement because Darwin Forensics hasn't hired anyone new since
28:00the Azaria Chamberlain case.
28:02Ah.
28:02That's Lauren and Oliver, the other interns.
28:05They're either siblings or they're dating.
28:07I can't actually tell which.
28:08Anyway, I'm paired with Toby the cadaver dog because according to the office manager,
28:12Diane, we're in the same pay bracket.
28:14Yeah, well, I'd get him away from the water, big eyes.
28:16He's in the lunch position there.
28:18The lunch position, ma'am?
28:20Oh, shivers.
28:22Um, Toby, come on.
28:25Toby, here, boy.
28:26Toby, come on.
28:30Toby, good boy.
28:33Isn't he so cute?
28:35Yeah.
28:36Yeah, we're all supposed to be on the backpacker case, but our boss, the profs, sent us here
28:40for the day, but I don't mind because I'm back with my work mums.
28:44So, Abby, I was wanting to...
28:45Oh, yeah.
28:45Oh, no, sorry.
28:46Why can't I do that?
28:48What's happening here?
28:48No, that's good.
28:49Oh, you didn't want to...
28:50No, that's good.
28:51Okay, um, cool.
28:52Okay, um, how is this investigation going?
28:55How'd you hear that?
28:57That's not a spacecraft.
28:58I assure you, I did not think it was.
29:01It's that hover cunt.
29:02Run.
29:03Eddie, Eddie, leave it.
29:05No, no stuff.
29:06Oi, I want to talk about Sunday night in the pub.
29:09So, is this a potential crime scene, ma'am?
29:12That's what we're trying to figure out.
29:13Don was headed here on Sunday night, so we're just looking for anything to indicate what
29:19might have happened.
29:20Did Don make it out here?
29:21You know, was he alone?
29:23Oh, wait, ma'am, you've just stepped in some Toby poo.
29:25No.
29:26I'll go get you a bag.
29:27Yep, great.
29:28Hi, hi, get back here, you everyone fuck!
29:30I just want to talk!
29:32Hang on.
29:32I've got it.
29:32Here, ma'am, you can lean on me.
29:34I think, right, right.
29:35Yeah, yeah.
29:36Ooh!
29:38Is anyone missing a bracelet with straight pride symbols on it?
29:43And an iced coffee?
29:56That your bracelet?
29:58None.
29:59All right, well, we did find it this morning at your dad's donger.
30:03Is what?
30:04At the...
30:05Donger.
30:05Your dad's donger.
30:07Okay.
30:07For fuck's sake, were you out there last night?
30:11No, I wasn't.
30:12I've got five kids under five and Greg's never changed a nappy, so that could be anyone's.
30:16Sure.
30:16But we did see you with it yesterday when you told Don Jr. Jr. he couldn't play with it.
30:24Well, so what did I was at the donger last night?
30:26What's it to you?
30:27What's it to us?
30:28What it...
30:28What it...
30:28What it to us is...
30:29Is that we think your dad was murdered out there.
30:31Eddie, no.
30:32Just fuck.
30:33Just...
30:35Um...
30:35What?
30:36Yeah.
30:37Yeah.
30:37What?
30:38You fully said dad was seen by a croc.
30:40No, we fully didn't.
30:42It was you that said that.
30:43Amber, we know about your dad's 70th, how he force-fed your husband, Grant, mud crabs,
30:49and that resulted in a fight where those crabs were weaponised.
30:53Why didn't you tell us about the crab fight, Amber?
30:56Why did you say it was a lovely night?
30:58Clearly it was.
30:59This is none of your fucking business that dad is a cunt!
31:04That dad was a cunt!
31:07Amber, if you don't tell us why you were out of the donger, then we're just going to have
31:10to guess.
31:11And we think you went out there to cover up a bit of a dad murder.
31:18Tell them the truth, Ames.
31:19Yeah.
31:20Listen to your mate, Amber.
31:21Fuck off.
31:23Alright, fine.
31:25I was out there because I was looking for the money.
31:27I didn't find it because someone else has been out there.
31:29I can tell because the donger's been winched off its blocks, and aside from that, I couldn't
31:33have killed him because I was at the hospital all Sunday night with Grant because his throat
31:36closed over, didn't I?
31:37Shut up.
31:38Wait.
31:38What money?
31:39The money he wants back.
31:40The money who wants back?
31:42Him!
31:43Who?
31:43Fucking him!
31:44Jason Wade!
31:45That land of crooks fuck paid dad 300 grand and now he wants her back!
31:50Can I go?
31:51I've got meat in the car.
31:55So Jason Wade grew up in Adelaide and attended an elite boys college that was burned down
31:59by its own old boys when it went co-ed.
32:01He has no prize, just a caution for driving 170 kilometres in a 160 school zone.
32:07Are you okay?
32:08No, I'm not.
32:08I'm police, Leo, and all of this is official police business.
32:13Uh-huh.
32:14I know.
32:14So if you publish anything about this case before a suspect is convicted of this crime,
32:20then not only will justice not be served for the victim, but the law will come down on
32:26you with the force of a hypernova.
32:29Do you understand?
32:30I do.
32:31Good.
32:31But also if you don't solve this case, I'm just going to bin the whole thing because nobody
32:34wants to hear about losers.
32:36Where was I?
32:37Anybody want a chip?
32:39Yeah?
32:40Tastes like B.O.
32:41Good B.O.
32:42Jason is the star and creator of Jason Wade's Adventures Down Under and the Marine spin-off
32:47Jason Wade's Adventures Down Under goes more down under.
32:50Eight years ago, he opened Jason Wade's Land of Crocs and Other Animals Wildlife Park near
32:54Dierks River.
32:58Oh, no, I'm done.
33:00Oh, okay.
33:01All right, great.
33:01Well, we'll head to Land of Crocs now.
33:06$350.
33:07We got this car yesterday.
33:08Is this normal?
33:09Yes.
33:10Detectives.
33:11Hold up.
33:13G'day, Moonboot.
33:14You don't answer your phone.
33:15Yeah, because it might be a bill.
33:16Well, it wasn't a bill.
33:17It was me.
33:18I was calling because a local man by the name of Mr. Rabbit reported a body part in the
33:23river.
33:25It's in the water off Dickie's Knob.
33:28Okay, great.
33:29Well, I know a ranger that would love to take you on a boat to collect that loot.
33:32No, no, no.
33:33See, my shift ends in ten minutes.
33:40Oh, no, don't look at me.
33:41I didn't bring my goggles.
33:44I'm off to Land of Crocs.
33:50Get out, you nungle-busted mince.
33:54Get out!
33:55Did you know Child Protection Services now has an app?
33:58Just key in your 26-digit flying pin for access.
34:01You're speaking with Ellen.
34:02Whoa, whoa, whoa, hello, hello, hello, hello.
34:04Hi, hello, hello.
34:05Oh, hi, Ellen.
34:06Ellen, is it?
34:07Yes.
34:07Yes, Ellen, hi.
34:08I'm Mikaela Morris, and I've recently become the kinship carer for my nephew, Maverick.
34:12One moment, please.
34:12No, don't put me on hold.
34:14Ellen.
34:15Connecting you with kinship services now, thank you.
34:18Fuck, at least fucking lube me up before you fuck me like this.
34:20Oh, oh!
34:21Oh!
34:23Oh!
34:27Are you right?
34:29It's another big day at Land of Crocs and other animals with our feeding of crocs kicking off soon in
34:35the croc arena.
34:36At 3 p.m. we have the batfish feeding, and don't forget to book in for your...
34:40All right, I need to speak with Jason Wade.
34:43The office isn't answering.
34:44Yeah, sorry.
34:44It's my turn on school holidays.
34:46One adult, that's $75, please.
34:48Uh, and police.
34:49Unless you're a family of four, it's $75, please.
34:54Right, right.
34:55Yep.
34:57No, I don't need that.
34:58I'm just...
34:59I'm just going to try and find...
35:01Yeah, I just need to know where...
35:02Don't forget your ticket.
35:03Here you go.
35:04Have a nice day.
35:05Next.
35:06Uh, could you direct me towards back of house?
35:09Thank you so much.
35:10Stand on the black X there, please.
35:11Oh, I just need to be directed towards back of house.
35:13See if that's okay.
35:14Okay.
35:14Big fella is to your left, so look up at him super scared.
35:18Who's up there?
35:19Oh.
35:20At 3 p.m., Kate and Kate are going into the Tube of Doom.
35:24And then at 4 p.m., folks, we had the city grunter feeding with me, Roisin.
35:29Okay?
35:30But starting now in the process here...
35:32Just go through a place.
35:33Right, okay.
35:33It's croc feeding time, the big fella!
35:36Thanks, Roisin.
35:37Take a seat, folks.
35:39Welcome, welcome.
35:40Good day, everyone.
35:42My name is Al, and I'm the land of crocs and other animals, indigenous ambassador.
35:47And this has been my people's country since time immemorial.
36:04Today, I welcome everyone in the crocosphere to my country.
36:10Okay?
36:12Sit down, people.
36:13Sit down.
36:15I am.
36:15I am a hundred thousand years caring for country, respecting country, and all its creatures.
36:22Why does Uncle have that yidaki? He doesn't even know how to play.
36:25Like Dungalaba.
36:30Dungalaba is language for my totem, the saltwater crocodile.
36:34And now, a special surprise for you all, the top end's favourite son, Jason Wayne!
36:46Thanks, Al, everybody give it up for him.
36:49I'll tell you what, folks, no-one knows these rivers and these crocs better than our Maydow.
36:54We'd all learn so much from you.
36:59G'day, g'day.
37:00G'day, g'day.
37:01G'day, g'day.
37:03G'day, g'day.
37:04G'day, g'day.
37:04G'day, g'day.
37:05My name is Jason Wayne.
37:07I might host a couple of TV shows.
37:09For fans of the house.
37:10Love it.
37:11But seriously, we all know who the real star of today is.
37:15Ladies and gents, give it up for Bigfella.
37:20Let's get him out here and give him a fiend.
37:31Yeah, so Moonboot said that Rabbit said that the body part was up round this way, so we've
37:36just got to go up that, um, tribe, tribe, tramiture, tree, uh, by, uh, Dickies Knop, so I reckon
37:43we just head downstream, Miffy.
37:45It's Mickey.
37:46Do you seriously not remember me?
37:48Mickey Morris, we went to school together?
37:51Oh, come on.
37:52It was you, me, my cousins, a bunch of white dogs talking racist shit about us even though
37:57they only shared one fucking face between them like it was a bong.
37:59Come on.
38:00You can't hang me at home, heck.
38:02Yeah, because I'd invite you out for darts at the creepypaste tree and you'd dog me every time.
38:07Yeah, cool. So what's been happening? You steal school?
38:11I'm 44.
38:12No shit, me too. Hey, I reckon we need to go to where the crocodile in the sunnies is.
38:17You do realise that's an activity map for kids?
38:22Hard left, I reckon. Miffy?
38:28Is that your sonar or works?
38:30Works.
38:32That's a bull shark. I know.
38:34Bull shark gave birth to a live young.
38:36Like you... you gave birth to your live young.
38:41Is that... is that how it happened?
38:44What's that one? Is that a sawfish?
38:46Sawfish cut their prey in half with their nose.
38:49It's not a sawfish, alright? I know what a sawfish is and that's not a sawfish!
38:53Worse than my kids.
38:55Is it a torso?
38:58Oh, bugger. It's just a foot.
39:00That's not gonna help us unless Don got a tear.
39:03Yeah. Where's its big toe?
39:07What's that say now?
39:08The hovercats! Yes!
39:17Shit shot my ass.
39:22I'm investigating Don Daryl's death.
39:24Okay, and you've spoken to Amber Daryl.
39:26I have and your name came up.
39:29You think there's something going on with me and Amber?
39:31No, that is not what I thought.
39:33Dulcy, come on.
39:34Detective is fine.
39:35How do I put this politely?
39:37My wife, Althea, is a former runner-up Miss Australia.
39:42She's one fashion on the fields.
39:43She's beautiful.
39:44Yeah.
39:45Have a look at her cover of Maxim.
39:46Pre-kids, of course.
39:47It's really not necessary for me to see your wife's photos.
39:50But you get it though, right?
39:51If I have an affair, it won't be with someone like Amber Daryl.
39:55She doesn't even register as a woman to me.
39:57Well, that is not why your name came up.
39:59She told us about the $300,000.
40:03Oh, that.
40:05Oh, you'll be worried there for a second, Dulcy.
40:07Detective.
40:09Why did you give Don Daryl $300,000?
40:12It's the boy King.
40:14The biggest croc in the territory.
40:16I've been trying to buy him for years.
40:18I knew the Daryls were struggling, so I made Don an offer he couldn't refuse.
40:22I paid him the cash Friday.
40:24Gonna need that back, obviously, now that he's dead.
40:27Done.
40:27Oh, King.
40:28I can wait till after the funeral.
40:30Gonna need the cash, obviously.
40:32Make more than that each week off hurricane drinks.
40:34Yeah, if that makes sense, they are $35 a pop.
40:37Can't believe you thought I was having an affair with Amber Daryl.
40:42Not what I thought, so...
40:44Anyway, Mrs and I have an event to get to.
40:47We're poor ambassadors, so let me walk you out.
40:50I'll see if I can remember where the staff exit is.
40:52Not on the ground much anymore, just flat chat.
40:55Filming my show, editing season 12 right now.
40:58And then we're gonna do a series where I'll drive a fast car over Salt Lake.
41:01Just back and forth.
41:02Me and big Russ.
41:03Russell Crowe.
41:19Hey, Leo!
41:21I shot down the hovercats.
41:23So, I need you to see if there's any footage on the drone of Don leaving the pub.
41:26So, yeah, all right, action you to action that.
41:29Come on.
41:29Quick dicks, Leo.
41:34That's a foot, don't worry about that.
41:35Eddie!
41:36I met the most amazing dog today!
41:39Awesome.
41:40Yeah, great.
41:41Look.
41:44His name's Boss.
41:45I'm a bit too busy to talk about dogs right now, okay?
41:47Hey, Leo, can we hurry this up?
41:49I need to get this foot to forensics before it gets soupy.
41:52There is footage saved on this drone.
41:54Is there anything from Sunday night?
42:00Okay, I'm going outside, Lozzie.
42:02Okay.
42:03Oh, bloody hell, that was a monumental waste of time.
42:06There is absolutely nothing here to suggest this is a crime scene.
42:08Yeah, because someone's hosed the site down, Oliver.
42:11I mean, look, there's water runoff, even though it hasn't rained here since last April.
42:15Of course it's rained here since then, Allie, that's ridiculous.
42:17No, it's the tropics.
42:18Grab Toby, yeah?
42:19We're leaving.
42:20Lozzie, let's get out of here.
42:21Okay.
42:22Toby, where are you?
42:25Toby?
42:26Toby?
42:32Freak!
42:32Freak!
42:33The lunch position!
42:36Toby?
42:39Toby?
42:41Toby, is that you?
42:45Toby?
42:45Toby?
42:47Oliver!
42:48Toby found a toe!
42:49It is the clam scene!
42:52No, Toby!
42:53That's evidence!
42:54Toby, no!
42:59Yeah, this is good, Leo, but there's no one around.
43:01The joint's dead.
43:02Looks like a model railway.
43:03Just go around the corner.
43:04I can't turn the camera around.
43:06I'm not controlling it.
43:07Nah, I've seen people do it.
43:08No, you've seen Google Street View.
43:10Oh, that's just me.
43:12It's 76 photos of boss.
43:13Cool.
43:14No!
43:15No, don't, don't go away.
43:16I haven't seen Don leave the pub.
43:18Where are you going now?
43:19Wait.
43:20I know where that is.
43:23That's near Don's Donga.
43:26That's just bloody Judy.
43:29G'day, g'day.
43:32Who do we have here then?
43:34So I'm doing K2, then Denali, then Everest with our geo.
43:38And then I'm back here for a six-parter where we barbecue fish on the beach.
43:42Sounds fun.
43:42Jason, I also will need your whereabouts for last Sunday night.
43:46My PAs know my director, just give them a call.
43:48Who are they?
43:49This is the exit.
43:49Do you need a selfie with me to show the girls back home?
43:52Uh, no.
43:52I think the girls are fine.
43:54Great, great.
43:54Awesome, awesome.
43:55Really great to meet you, Dalton.
43:57I'm really special.
43:57Okay, take care.
43:58And your PAs contacts.
43:59Let's take the numbers up there.
44:04That was, yeah.
44:16Eddie.
44:18Collins.
44:19There was someone else out of Don's Donga.
44:21They got picked up on the drone on Sunday night.
44:23They're dragging Don's body up the jetty.
44:25What?
44:26Can you tell who it is?
44:27It's Chomp.
44:28Sorry.
44:29It's who?
44:29Oh, God.
44:30Chomp from Land of Crocs.
44:32He's our killer.
44:34Collins?
44:34Collins, you still there?
44:44Hey!
45:08Oh, or something okay?
45:13What?
45:13Oh!
45:13Oh oh!
45:14Oh.
45:14Oh!
45:16Oh,引 ahead.
45:18Oh!
45:21Oh!
45:24Oh!
45:25Oh, oh!
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