- 3 minutes ago
In today's society, our children are constantly being fed
images of beauty that don't always represent them. From
their beautiful brown skin to their curly hair, true confidence
starts at home. Join us for a conversation about the
importance of building self-confidence in our black babies
from the womb.
images of beauty that don't always represent them. From
their beautiful brown skin to their curly hair, true confidence
starts at home. Join us for a conversation about the
importance of building self-confidence in our black babies
from the womb.
Category
🛠️
LifestyleTranscript
00:00Happy Saturday, everybody, to anybody that has just joined us.
00:14My name is Glenn McGee, and I'm the busy and passion editor here at Justice Magazine, and
00:20we are so happy to welcome you today to the busy carnival.
00:24Coming up next, we have someone who is truly incredible that I'm sure you've all learned
00:30well from either way, and also just next panel is a true multi-hypening, achieving success
00:36across the entertainment world in music, film, and television.
00:42Please welcome to the stage two-time Grammy Award winner, multi-planning authority artist,
00:49and founding member of Destiny's Child, Luke Mayola.
00:54We have a great conversation, so if all my mamas and fathers around, we'll be talking
01:09to all mothers today, I'm going to talk to them a little closer, because we've had a great
01:14conversation, so if all my mamas and fathers around, we'll be talking to all mamas today,
01:22I want y'all to come a little closer
01:23because we have a much-needed discussion
01:26that's about to take place on this stage.
01:29So let's do it, y'all.
01:31I have to say that even when I was asked to do this,
01:36I was like, now I'm going to get through this
01:37because any time I'm talking about my kids,
01:40I get emotional.
01:41And that's right, ladies.
01:42And I see some hands on women
01:44that are raising African-American children.
01:49I mean, our stories are different.
01:50And I'm like, yes.
01:53So we're going to talk about raising our kids
01:56in today's world with social media,
01:58with everything going on,
02:00the ups and downs,
02:02and just everything about it.
02:04I'm going to have a love discussion.
02:07A love discussion about it.
02:09I know it's some questions that you guys might have out there.
02:13And hopefully you guys are learning some things to do.
02:16We're going to be very transparent.
02:17I know I am.
02:18And these two ladies that I'm bringing out
02:20are the alpha women,
02:22the alpha mothers,
02:23who are also raising their children
02:25in today's world of social media.
02:28But they're doing it with a little bit of a
02:30something else on top.
02:32Because, you know,
02:33they're well known.
02:35Bringing, especially bringing your kids,
02:37into the limelight.
02:38It can sometimes be scary.
02:39So let me just help and bring these ladies out of here.
02:43All right, y'all.
02:44First up,
02:45you have entrepreneur,
02:47podcast host,
02:48influencer,
02:49and the agent has the Victoria Burleson.
02:52Yes.
02:53Come on now,
02:53mama.
02:55As high as she can be.
02:56At last,
03:00we're going to be spread
03:01entrepreneur,
03:02sorry for just so long,
03:03from all the marriage on sale,
03:05as well as the face of
03:06seven cannabis premier skin care
03:08of Melanie Serene.
03:10Hey, mama.
03:13Yes.
03:13And two ladies,
03:14a round of applause,
03:15y'all.
03:16A big welcome.
03:17Have a seat.
03:18Let's get into it.
03:19All right.
03:21Now,
03:23the way we do it
03:24is a little different
03:25we know we're in,
03:25okay?
03:26Especially with raising
03:27our babies in the limelight.
03:29But first of all,
03:30let's talk about our babies.
03:33I'll start.
03:34I have two children.
03:36Their names are
03:37Gianna and Tyson.
03:39Gianna is three.
03:40Tyson is 21 months.
03:42And they are one of my lives.
03:44I know everybody,
03:46you know,
03:46your grandparents
03:47with family,
03:47they have everything
03:48they want to say
03:49oh,
03:49they don't grow fast,
03:50they don't do this
03:50or whatever,
03:51but nobody told me.
03:53All that comes with
03:54raising,
03:56first of all,
03:57the family that I had
03:58to want you to
03:59for a little bit,
04:00nobody told me
04:01it's scary,
04:02okay?
04:03No, seriously.
04:04It's a whole different experience.
04:06I'm traumatized.
04:08I'm seeking therapy,
04:09okay?
04:10It's a real thing.
04:11Oh,
04:12but I love them.
04:14And I don't protect them
04:16like crazy.
04:17And the way we have
04:18to protect our children,
04:20especially with being
04:20in the wildlife
04:21is a little different.
04:22But also because
04:23we're raising
04:24black children.
04:26It's a baby's world
04:26with social media,
04:28with things going on
04:29in schools.
04:30I mean,
04:31it's crazy out here,
04:31so that's much
04:32to be able to run
04:33to a certain team
04:35that's where you are.
04:36So I'm not
04:37going to be in a bunch.
04:38I'm being under three.
04:40My oldest name
04:42is a senior-based
04:43senior in high school
04:44in the fall.
04:45My second son
04:46will be a junior
04:48in high school
04:49in the fall.
04:50And then I'll be
04:50giving her a hand
04:51to her birthday.
04:52Happy birthday,
04:53Mia!
04:54She's as well as her.
04:55She's in the seventh grade
04:57in the fall.
04:58Hello, everyone!
05:02So I have four children.
05:03They are 10,
05:059,
05:066,
05:06and 2.
05:07So I'm kind of
05:08like Latoya.
05:09I had two children
05:10in the same year.
05:12One in January,
05:12and 22.
05:13One in December,
05:1422.
05:14So I'm not
05:15about to see
05:15one of the two.
05:17But I have three girls
05:19and one son.
05:20And I am just
05:21very thrilled
05:22that God so big
05:23to give me the test
05:25to raise some please.
05:26You know,
05:27calm and the king
05:28as well.
05:29So I'm just thankful
05:30to be here
05:30and share some insight
05:31with you guys.
05:32It's where it is
05:33of course encouragement
05:34as it comes to
05:35raising our white children.
05:37Yes.
05:38Now you really can't
05:39talk about
05:39raising your own children
05:40without starting off
05:41talking about
05:42the people you were raised.
05:44Have any of you
05:45asked this way?
05:48Do any of you
05:49struggle with
05:49self-confidence
05:50or your beauty
05:52identity?
05:53Because, you know,
05:54when you get to school,
05:55your hair is different.
05:56Your collection
05:57is different.
05:58All of the, you know,
06:00kids are kids.
06:01Sometimes I can't
06:01get old.
06:03Um, how has it
06:05impacted
06:06the way you
06:07raise your children
06:08now?
06:09Let's start with you
06:10and I'm sorry.
06:11Yeah, I definitely did.
06:12I think, you know,
06:14what was that
06:15for me?
06:16I was younger.
06:17I was always
06:17the tall,
06:18tall,
06:20sweet girl.
06:20and I feel like
06:23the people around
06:25you look different.
06:26You're a pair of eyes
06:27and you're like,
06:28their bodies are different.
06:30And I think the hardest part
06:32is like,
06:32do you get around
06:32that list?
06:33Because when you're younger,
06:34you don't know, right?
06:35You just have a fun,
06:36you're playing with your friends,
06:37like, you can get bored.
06:38You can try to go to school,
06:39you start noticing
06:40the differences.
06:42So it's like,
06:42you've had those
06:43toys like,
06:44you know,
06:45you listen to conversations
06:46around to make you feel different.
06:47So, for me,
06:49the only thing
06:50that I struggled with was
06:51I didn't really
06:51want to talk to them about it.
06:53You know,
06:53I felt like,
06:54do I talk to my mom
06:56about these things?
06:57Should I?
06:57You know,
06:57it's uncomfortable.
06:59And I,
06:59for me,
07:00I promised myself
07:01that I had a girl
07:02and my wife
07:03and my wife
07:03and my wife
07:05and I would always
07:06ask me questions
07:07about each person
07:08and give me
07:08attention to all
07:09about my questions.
07:10You know,
07:10how are you feeling?
07:12What's going on with this?
07:13You know,
07:13when I was in school
07:14and I went through this,
07:16is this the same for you?
07:18Because when you
07:18know on their level
07:19and you actually
07:20talk to me
07:20and they relate to you
07:22and they're like,
07:23okay,
07:23I'm putting my guard down.
07:25My mom gets me
07:26and I can have
07:27these conversations.
07:27So,
07:28it was really big for me
07:29just thinking about
07:30myself growing up
07:31and thinking about
07:32where I struggled
07:32and making sure
07:34that my kids
07:35had an opportunity
07:36and a safe place
07:37to talk about it.
07:39So,
07:40wonderful.
07:40My swagger,
07:41was it crazy?
07:42How was the talk?
07:43I was like,
07:43I'm seven,
07:44six to four,
07:45three.
07:46So,
07:46I'm scared.
07:47Everyone thought
07:48I was going to be
07:48super,
07:49super tall
07:49and I just got growing
07:50but I was always
07:51the tallest girl
07:53in the class,
07:54super skinny,
07:55much like this.
07:56Everyone just thought
07:57that she's going to be
07:58super tall
07:58and she's not one day
07:59so that expectation
08:00was put on me
08:02at a very early age
08:03and I just got growing.
08:04so for me,
08:05what I remember
08:07growing up
08:08and how I was raised,
08:09you know,
08:10raised in a single
08:11caring home,
08:12my mother always
08:13made sure to
08:15give me
08:16the necessary
08:17conversations
08:18and the necessary,
08:19I would say,
08:20safe,
08:20deep environment
08:21to feel comfortable
08:22to talk to her
08:23about whatever
08:24I was feeling.
08:24So,
08:25she made sure
08:26that I was confident
08:27because she always
08:28reminded me
08:29of who I was
08:30and who I was
08:31you know what I mean?
08:33She made sure
08:34to give me
08:36the necessary tools
08:37to be able
08:38to meet in your life
08:39and have those
08:39conversations
08:40where now
08:41with my daughter
08:42she's 10
08:43and she's super tall
08:44like me
08:45and once a time
08:45she's going to be
08:46very tall
08:47but with her
08:48I made sure
08:49to have a safe
08:50place for her
08:51where she knows
08:51she can talk to me
08:52about anything.
08:52There was no
08:53you know what I was saying
08:55and this is what it is.
08:56My mother wasn't insane.
08:58My mother could actually
08:58hear me out.
09:00She was like
09:00to express myself
09:01and maybe
09:02this is my
09:02now I'm going to
09:03help you down
09:03with expressing myself
09:04as my mother gave me
09:05this safety
09:06you know what I mean?
09:07They won't do that.
09:09So now I'm very particular
09:10to make sure
09:10my children
09:11have that as well
09:12so their communication
09:14skills aren't
09:15blanking
09:16and that's one of the
09:17reasons we have
09:17the love of a man's mouth
09:18and don't know
09:19how to communicate
09:19because it's as key
09:20as they were shown
09:21now every second
09:22of the day.
09:23So,
09:25but if I can't
09:25really talk about
09:26who they talk about it
09:27and what I mean
09:29you know
09:29it's wonderful
09:29I heard you both
09:30say something
09:31about creating
09:32the safe space
09:32of the communication
09:33you know what I mean?
09:35I feel like the patience
09:36is different
09:37with our generation
09:38as it compares
09:40to maybe our mother
09:41and our grandmother
09:42and I'll say
09:43because they were doing
09:44what they had to do
09:44because they needed
09:45to get done.
09:46If they were having
09:47to work two to three jobs
09:48they were doing their best
09:49to do that
09:50to take care of us
09:51financially
09:51especially as a single mom
09:53but also
09:55sometimes
09:57the patience
09:57was there
09:58but
09:59they kind of feel
10:00open to
10:01communicating
10:02their feelings
10:03what they were going through
10:04because in young moms
10:05too.
10:06You know what I mean?
10:07Some of us had young moms
10:08but I feel like
10:10with my kids
10:11I'm having to be
10:12very patient
10:13and listen
10:14just because they can't
10:16only communicate
10:17even at three years old
10:18they still aren't
10:19expressing themselves
10:20so regardless
10:21of what you might
10:22be going through
10:23like me
10:23I just came out
10:24of a divorce
10:24right?
10:25So even though I'm
10:26emotionally
10:27trying to figure
10:28things out
10:29and how to go forward
10:30I know that
10:31I have to have
10:32a certain amount
10:33of patience
10:33especially with my
10:34babies now
10:35then
10:36you know
10:37it's not the same
10:38with my emotions
10:39aside
10:39but even as I'm
10:41trying to process
10:41things
10:42I have to say
10:43wait a minute
10:43take a minute
10:44listen to them
10:45in their eyes
10:46put them in their faces
10:47listen to what they're saying
10:49if they're having
10:50these
10:50emotional moments
10:51and falling out
10:52or just like
10:53mommy I don't understand
10:54what's going on
10:54pay attention to it
10:56don't just move on
10:57from it
10:58even if you're busy
10:59and working
11:00and you have
11:01other things going on
11:02your babies will tell you
11:04your babies will tell you
11:06in their own
11:06special way
11:08so what I have
11:09definitely learned
11:10and I feel like
11:10what my mom told me
11:11is having
11:13patience
11:14and slowing down
11:15even in the midst
11:18of it all
11:18slow down
11:19because the Bible
11:20talks about
11:20get sealed
11:21that's right
11:22come on now
11:23you know what
11:23if you hear from
11:24guys you think
11:24you're running around
11:25and running your mouth
11:26and doing all these
11:26things
11:27get sealed
11:28get sealed
11:30and God's got to
11:31keep what our babies
11:32want from us
11:33the most
11:33peace
11:35it's not what
11:36money we're spending
11:37on them
11:37it's not
11:38you know
11:39I'm not saying
11:40anything is wrong
11:41with that money
11:42even in class
11:42and all these
11:43different things
11:44but it's really
11:45looking them in the face
11:46are you okay
11:48how are you feeling
11:49how did you sleep
11:51levels
11:51how are things
11:53going
11:53and I'm seeing
11:55different things
11:56about three years
11:56old
11:56she started
11:57she started
11:57answering
11:58I'm fine
11:59Bobby I'm good
11:59what did you say
12:00I was really
12:00asking you
12:01yes
12:02how are you doing
12:03how did you get
12:04so beautiful
12:05okay
12:05we can talk
12:06about this all day
12:06let's go once
12:07in the back
12:07let's go
12:08what they are
12:10choosing
12:10are possibly
12:11being exposed
12:11to
12:11that we weren't
12:12exposed to
12:13growing up
12:14social media
12:15from the day
12:16these kids are born
12:17they are on
12:18social media
12:19and I'll ask y'all
12:20the YouTube channels
12:21my gosh
12:22and they move
12:23around
12:24you know
12:25since coming
12:25into the world
12:26how have you managed
12:28to spell
12:28that announcement
12:30of maintaining
12:30your self esteem
12:32in the age
12:33of social media
12:35for service
12:35so
12:36for me
12:38because they
12:38might are
12:39in my season
12:39too
12:40they're not on
12:41Instagram
12:41or Facebook
12:42or any of me
12:43but they are
12:44YouTubers
12:44okay
12:45they love YouTube
12:47and so they
12:47have been
12:48imperative
12:48for me
12:49to just
12:50help them
12:51or help them
12:52understand
12:53body positivity
12:54and help them
12:55to use
12:55and help them
12:56understand
12:57we're all
12:57different
12:58health
12:58and different
12:59shape sizes
13:00and wherever
13:00you are
13:01the influence
13:02to that
13:03is where
13:03you're supposed
13:04to be
13:05is set
13:05where you're
13:06supposed to be
13:06you are uniquely
13:07made
13:08uniquely created
13:09you are the
13:10apple of God's eye
13:11and he
13:13says you
13:13exactly
13:14the way
13:14he wants
13:15you to be
13:15and so
13:16you know
13:16of course
13:17I'm going to
13:17turn the
13:18Facebook
13:18videos
13:19around
13:19and all
13:19of that
13:2020 months
13:20to use
13:21I make
13:22sure
13:22that they
13:22understand
13:23the
13:23line
13:24of
13:24people
13:25need to
13:25keep
13:25what
13:26or
13:26what
13:27you're
13:27trying
13:27to
13:27do
13:28and
13:28all
13:28your
13:28tours
13:29are like
13:29what
13:30you know
13:31they've been
13:31all
13:31on all this
13:32mainly
13:32right
13:33and
13:33you know
13:34so
13:34like
13:35you
13:35know
13:35maybe
13:35there
13:36everything
13:36is
13:36not
13:37reality
13:38so
13:38I have
13:38those
13:39conversations
13:39and
13:39having
13:40those
13:41real
13:41conversations
13:41and showing
13:42what it
13:42really is
13:43what it
13:43is
13:44just
13:45when you
13:46are
13:46body
13:46positivity
13:47that's why
13:48so
13:49I'm
13:49older
13:50and you're
13:51right
13:51about
13:51reality
13:52you know
13:53versus
13:53what they
13:54see
13:54I had
13:55conversations
13:56with my
13:56boys
13:57many times
13:57and now
13:58my daughter
13:58she's navigating
14:00where she's
14:00now in
14:01middle school
14:01so
14:02it's about
14:03when we were
14:04in middle school
14:04we talked about
14:05the good
14:05garrison
14:06to each other
14:06well now
14:07they have
14:07conversations
14:08to each
14:08other
14:09but they
14:09also have
14:09conversations
14:10on social
14:10media
14:11so it's
14:12non-stop
14:12comparisons
14:13in their
14:13mind
14:14so
14:14what I did
14:15was I
14:16live in
14:16social
14:17media
14:17because I
14:18didn't want
14:19that to be
14:19what they
14:21saw all
14:22the time
14:22for instance
14:23my daughter
14:24I just
14:24explained to
14:25her
14:25you know
14:26when I
14:26grew up
14:27and you
14:27watched
14:28something
14:28on TV
14:29and there
14:30was a
14:30note
14:30where you
14:30looked at
14:31and you
14:31said
14:31first I
14:31wanted to
14:32do that
14:32or I
14:32think
14:33about
14:33what did
14:34you do
14:35with
14:35you
14:35when you
14:36went outside
14:36you were
14:37on the
14:37court
14:37trying
14:38you were
14:38singing
14:39and dancing
14:39and that's
14:40your friend
14:41you got
14:41you
14:42you
14:42can
14:42communicate
14:43because I
14:43told my
14:44daughter
14:44it's great
14:45you can see
14:45something
14:46but it's more
14:47important to be
14:48a creative
14:49to go out there
14:50and see
14:51if it's
14:52something you
14:52really like
14:53try it out
14:54for yourself
14:54you can't sit
14:56on social media
14:56and expect
14:57anything red
14:58to happen
14:58in life
14:59so I wanted
15:00them to
15:00understand
15:00that one
15:01two was
15:02living social
15:03media for them
15:03was important
15:04because it
15:06can be
15:06addictive
15:07I mean
15:08if you
15:08look at
15:08the stats
15:09you know
15:10if you
15:10just
15:10go out
15:11as an adult
15:11like the
15:12waterfall
15:12all the time
15:13and it's
15:13happening
15:13in a great
15:14world
15:14there
15:14right
15:14with
15:15Instagram
15:15and Facebook
15:16so
15:16it's about
15:17being
15:18mad now
15:18that you're
15:19creating
15:19it
15:19so you
15:20don't want
15:20that
15:20making
15:21so I have
15:21shut down
15:22times
15:22and I cannot
15:23be on it
15:24and I force
15:26them to sit
15:27and talk
15:27kids don't
15:29talk anymore
15:29and it's not
15:31talk
15:32like when you
15:33sit at the
15:33table
15:34dinner time
15:35and first
15:35sit on the couch
15:36to fall down
15:37real tall
15:37and they're
15:38like oh
15:38mom
15:39and now
15:40they love it
15:40and the crazy
15:41part about
15:42our family
15:42they love it
15:43but my sons
15:44and their
15:44friends
15:45will be
15:45they love
15:46the city
15:46talk
15:47you want to
15:47tell me
15:47you know
15:48what happened
15:48who did
15:49what
15:49what did
15:50you do
15:50about this
15:51but it's
15:51once again
15:52teaching them
15:54to put their
15:54phones out
15:55and take a
15:56break
15:56and do
15:56anything
15:56it's all
15:57about
15:58habits
15:58and who's
15:59can we
15:59do
15:59yes
16:00I'm going to tell you
16:02also listening
16:04especially if you're in the backseat
16:06listening to what they're listening to
16:08it's super important
16:09in some of the shows
16:10not just YouTube
16:12but some of the shows
16:12that they're watching
16:13on Netflix
16:14which is on TV
16:14period
16:15I've heard some language
16:16it's not even
16:17class words
16:18or anything like that
16:18but you're a liar
16:20or you're ugly
16:21or you're like
16:22paying attention
16:23to stuff like that
16:24I was like
16:24no you're not watching that
16:25but no
16:25we're not
16:26because
16:27it's making them
16:28you know
16:29it's making them
16:29what
16:30even it's bothering
16:31and they're making
16:32three different points
16:32that's acceptable
16:33that's okay
16:34to talk to someone
16:35like that
16:36so make sure you
16:37listen really closely
16:38to what you're listening to
16:40as you want to play
16:40and do it
16:41and you're going to see
16:42if you're being
16:42because these things
16:43never mind
16:44we're just crazy
16:44and you're going to
16:45so you're going to
16:46be on those
16:47and you're going to
16:47have somebody
16:48to play
16:48with things
16:49that
16:49that's right
16:50how do you both
16:51like myself
16:52have been in the
16:53live life for a while
16:54right
16:54how do you create
16:55certain boundaries
16:56to protect your children
16:57mentally and physically
16:59so you know
17:05you can just
17:05do your mouth
17:06that is
17:06I try
17:07I try
17:08to keep my house
17:08very
17:09you know
17:10structure
17:10I can't know
17:11what they're doing
17:12every day
17:12and when you see us
17:14it's how everyone
17:15else saw us
17:16when it was the people
17:17at school
17:17that go home
17:18that go home
17:19like mom
17:19someone tells me
17:21this
17:21or someone tells me
17:22this is true
17:23and I'm like
17:24how easy
17:25because they're
17:25having the
17:25conversations
17:26so we've had
17:27the conversations
17:28and now they're
17:29going to have
17:29to have social
17:30medias
17:30for their friends
17:31sending themselves
17:32on there
17:32so it is
17:34constant conversation
17:36with my kids
17:37because I don't
17:39want them to see us
17:40or I don't want
17:41them to find their
17:42worth in what
17:43their friends
17:43see us
17:44I want them
17:45to find their
17:45worth
17:46to know who they
17:47are
17:48and to think
17:48other than married
17:49so this is just
17:50our job
17:51just to give
17:52everyone else
17:52does a job
17:53however
17:53it's not
17:54who we are
17:55we know
17:55who we are
17:56is from the
17:56poor
17:57and you
17:57be careful
17:58with people
17:59I don't care
17:59and you
18:00surround you
18:01and you
18:02cause all the
18:02tapes
18:03that one
18:03person
18:04report
18:04and it
18:05changes
18:05the game
18:05so just
18:06reminding me
18:07of those
18:07especially
18:08because I
18:08have high
18:09schoolers
18:09it's a different
18:10game
18:10you know
18:10they're on
18:10snapchat
18:11it's the ones
18:12you don't
18:12have on
18:13I don't know
18:13I need to get
18:13that
18:14right
18:15so
18:16so they get
18:17snapchat
18:17and I just
18:18probably want to be
18:18friends
18:19because we're
18:19going to have
18:19that
18:20take that
18:22down
18:22that's
18:23inappropriate
18:23so if you
18:24get to
18:24that
18:24I just
18:25know
18:25so far
18:26I'm like
18:26listen
18:26I want
18:28you to
18:28understand
18:29that
18:30are your
18:31goal
18:31right
18:31as well
18:32everything
18:33you put
18:33out there
18:34is a
18:34representation
18:34for you
18:35on a
18:35job
18:36one day
18:36they might
18:37look on
18:37your
18:37social
18:38media
18:38and see
18:38that
18:38so think
18:39about
18:40one year
18:41of life
18:41so you
18:41can ask
18:42yourself
18:42what is
18:43possible
18:43is
18:43that
18:44cancer
18:44and how
18:44she
18:45didn't
18:45cancer
18:46might
18:46possibly
18:47be
18:47yes
18:47don't
18:48put it
18:48on
18:48so my
18:51children are
18:51a little
18:51bit smaller
18:52so like
18:52I said
18:53they don't
18:53have social
18:54media accounts
18:54but I
18:56have definitely
18:56taken the
18:57necessary
18:58stances
18:58meaning you
18:59probably know
18:59I just went
19:00through the forest
19:01last year
19:02and so
19:03their entire
19:04life changed
19:04like a nice
19:05normal change
19:06for them
19:07so for me
19:08I made sure
19:09that I put
19:10them in therapy
19:10they have the
19:12therapists
19:12that they see
19:13every other week
19:14and for me
19:15it's about
19:15building big
19:16village
19:17where I
19:18know that
19:18at times
19:19even though
19:19they may
19:20not feel
19:20comfortable
19:20or want
19:21to talk
19:21to me
19:22about
19:22something
19:22they have
19:23someone
19:23that they
19:24feel
19:24comfortable
19:24talking to
19:26about
19:26things
19:26so she
19:27asked me
19:28hey mom
19:28is somebody
19:29coming this
19:30way
19:30because they're
19:31ready to see
19:32their therapist
19:32right
19:33because I need
19:33to talk to
19:34her about
19:34something
19:34I need to
19:35tell her
19:35what's been
19:36going on
19:36so for me
19:38it's just
19:38been so
19:39important
19:39you know
19:40with me
19:40and I'm like
19:41people know
19:42I need people
19:42more of
19:45their situation
19:46and what you
19:47want to
19:47feel safe
19:48and comfortable
19:49and have
19:49the necessary
19:50village
19:51to where
19:51they're not
19:52holding things
19:52in and they
19:53have people
19:54that they
19:55feel comfortable
19:55talking to
19:57and I would
19:57also say
19:58get ahead of
19:58the train
19:59right
19:59especially
20:00when you're
20:01going through
20:02things like
20:02the divorce
20:03or just
20:04anything
20:04might come
20:05out of the
20:05media
20:05have that
20:06conversation
20:07with the
20:07first
20:08before you
20:09allow media
20:10or social
20:10media
20:11or friends
20:11like you
20:12said
20:12to
20:13tell their
20:14version
20:14because sometimes
20:15the friends
20:16can be more
20:17influential
20:18than you
20:18can
20:19because they
20:19have that
20:20fun bond
20:20in that
20:21relationship
20:21so I would
20:22say you
20:22have the
20:23conversation
20:23with your
20:24kids first
20:24so you
20:25can say
20:25hey listen
20:26this is
20:26what's
20:27going on
20:27you see
20:27what mommy
20:28is doing
20:29you see
20:29you know
20:29what mommy
20:30is
20:30don't believe
20:31that I
20:32don't believe
20:32what you see
20:33out there
20:33you know
20:34your mommy
20:34you know
20:35what I mean
20:35so I would
20:36say get ahead
20:36of the train
20:37now for all
20:38the kids
20:39expecting moms
20:40some moms
20:41out there
20:42who have
20:43been had
20:43experience
20:44raising my
20:44children
20:45what's one
20:46they spent
20:46by such
20:47you can give
20:47them
20:47take your
20:51time
20:52I know
20:52there's lots
20:54of advice
20:54so I'll
20:54come here
20:55okay
20:56I would say
20:58I have
21:00older kids
21:01and I
21:02look back
21:03when they were
21:03younger
21:04you know
21:04a birthday
21:05comes up
21:05something
21:06reminds you
21:07of something
21:07and you
21:07spent
21:08like a good
21:09time
21:09just being
21:12present
21:13in the
21:13moments
21:14I think
21:15that is
21:15so important
21:16you know
21:18I think
21:19we're always
21:19fresh
21:20like oh
21:20I can't
21:20sleep
21:21wrong
21:21oh
21:21I can't
21:22wait to
21:22do
21:22walk
21:23oh
21:23I can't
21:23wait to
21:24be
21:24see them
21:24walk
21:25in the
21:25corner
21:25by
21:25themselves
21:26you know
21:26they're
21:26always
21:27under
21:27rushing
21:27to the
21:28next
21:28stage
21:28but
21:29then
21:29you
21:29miss
21:30out
21:30on
21:30the
21:54you
21:56know
21:58and
21:59you
22:01know
22:02when
22:03they're
22:03little
22:03you know
22:04when
22:04they're
22:04sad
22:05they can
22:05get down
22:06right in
22:06their face
22:07you can
22:07talk to
22:07them
22:08when they
22:08can only
22:09sit down
22:09on the
22:10sofa
22:10in a
22:11chair
22:11on the
22:11table
22:12to have
22:12a
22:12conversation
22:13be present
22:14because
22:15people
22:15feel
22:16something
22:16you know
22:17when they
22:18get older
22:19people
22:20feel
22:23comfortable
22:23coming to
22:24you
22:24they won't
22:25go to
22:25the next
22:25person
22:26call their
22:27friend
22:27they'll
22:27call mom
22:28or dad
22:28so
22:28just really
22:29spend the
22:29time with
22:30them
22:30it goes
22:31fast
22:31I love
22:32that
22:32that was
22:32a beautiful
22:33answer
22:33I agree
22:34I agree
22:34with everything
22:35she said
22:36and for
22:37me
22:37you know
22:38I look
22:38at my
22:39children
22:39I look
22:41at them
22:41as individual
22:42souls
22:43and I look
22:44at them
22:44as
22:45souls
22:46that God
22:46has given
22:47me
22:47to help
22:48move
22:49their
22:49body
22:49frame
22:50to help
22:51make sure
22:52they grow
22:53and they
22:53become as
22:54as they
22:54are supposed
22:55to be
22:56and so
22:56I look
22:57at them
22:57individually
22:58I make
23:00sure that
23:00when it
23:01comes to
23:01their
23:02talents
23:02right
23:03I am
23:04trying to
23:04see what
23:05is the
23:05piece
23:05of super
23:06diverse
23:07issue
23:07about
23:08each
23:08of them
23:08and then
23:09how can
23:09I as
23:10their
23:10parent
23:10make sure
23:11they know
23:11they have
23:12that God
23:13is on the
23:14youth
23:14that God
23:14has already
23:15given them
23:16you know
23:16so I look
23:18at them
23:18that way
23:18and I look
23:19at it
23:19as I've
23:20been tasked
23:21with making
23:21sure that
23:22their souls
23:22present with
23:23what they're
23:24supposed to
23:24do
23:24while they're
23:25married
23:25that they
23:26become
23:26present with
23:26who they're
23:27supposed to
23:27be
23:28you know
23:28I can't
23:29sometimes
23:29when I do
23:30my mom said
23:31be cute
23:31and try to
23:32be smart
23:33I know
23:34down to
23:34her
23:34and I
23:35look at
23:35her
23:35and talk
23:36to her
23:36and look
23:36in her
23:36eyes
23:37as me
23:37to her
23:38soul
23:38and then
23:40the struggle
23:40of her
23:41being said
23:41the whole
23:42sentence is
23:43it's me
23:43right
23:45it's me
23:46so
23:47I see
23:48my children
23:49so you
23:49know
23:49every day
23:50like I said
23:50I just
23:51strive to
23:51make sure
23:51they're
23:52going down
23:53the path
23:53and they
23:54are
23:54missing
23:54to go
23:55down
23:55but
23:55the one
23:56I want
23:58them to
23:58go down
23:59the financial
24:00talents
24:00and guidance
24:01to spend
24:02them
24:02from her
24:02all right
24:04the final
24:04two cents
24:05is give
24:05yourself
24:05some
24:06graces
24:06give
24:07yourself
24:08some
24:08grace
24:09and
24:09be patient
24:10with
24:10yourself
24:11okay
24:12there's no
24:12manual that
24:13comes with
24:13mothering
24:14we think
24:15we don't
24:15want you
24:15to ask
24:16our home
24:16did you
24:17get your
24:17paper
24:17and your
24:18book
24:18I said
24:19this is how
24:19you raise
24:20a black
24:20child
24:20and I
24:21didn't get
24:22high
24:22maybe I
24:23was missing
24:23from the
24:23back
24:24so give
24:25yourself
24:25some grace
24:26you're not
24:26going to
24:27get it
24:27right
24:27every time
24:28and that
24:29is perfectly
24:30okay
24:31just like I
24:32talked about
24:32being patient
24:32with your
24:33kids
24:33have some
24:34patience
24:34with yourself
24:35and when
24:36you do
24:36mess up
24:37it is
24:37perfectly
24:38fine
24:39do some
24:39self-checking
24:40talk about
24:41it
24:42and let
24:42your baby
24:42know
24:43hey
24:43I'm in
24:45what's wrong
24:45for that
24:46the one
24:47thing that
24:47I love
24:49about my
24:49mom is
24:50there is
24:50some
24:50accountability
24:51and I
24:52know
24:53in my
24:53mom's
24:54generation
24:54my
24:54grandmother's
24:55generation
24:55because
24:56when I
24:57say
24:57I'm not
24:59going to
24:59tell you
25:00I messed
25:00up
25:00even though
25:01I did
25:01mess
25:02up
25:02we need
25:03accountability
25:04or accountability
25:05in this
25:05generation
25:06so when
25:07you don't
25:07mess up
25:08when you
25:08weren't as
25:09patient as
25:10you wanted
25:10to be
25:11when you
25:11said something
25:12that might
25:13help
25:13slip down
25:14because you
25:14are angry
25:14with something
25:15else
25:15or you
25:16can be
25:16kind of
25:17patient
25:17with them
25:18just go
25:18back and
25:19say mom
25:19you're
25:19sorry
25:20I didn't
25:21mean that
25:21it was never
25:22again
25:22it was never
25:23my intention
25:23to hurt you
25:24or make you
25:25feel a certain
25:25way
25:26but give
25:27yourself
25:28some grace
25:29love on
25:30yourself
25:30have some
25:31meantime
25:32especially
25:33when you
25:34see
25:34you know
25:35you feel
25:35like you
25:35can
25:35stretch
25:36and there's
25:36bad
25:37self-care
25:38self-care
25:39isn't
25:39important
25:40because
25:41if you're
25:42running
25:43on
25:43that's
25:45how you
25:45don't
25:45come
25:46out
25:46to
25:46them
25:46quarantine
25:48yourself
25:48it's
25:49just
25:49self-obulish
25:50I
25:51feel
25:51like
25:51you
25:52don't
25:52feel
25:53like
25:53you
25:54don't
25:54feel
25:54it
25:54all
25:54by
25:54yourself
25:55or
25:55you
25:55weren't
25:56doing
25:56it
25:56right
25:56and it's
25:57okay
25:58to
25:58call out
25:58for help
25:59from your
26:00goodness
26:00sometimes
26:01it's
26:01okay
26:02to have a
26:02nanny
26:02it's
26:03okay
26:03to do
26:04all of
26:04these
26:05different
26:05things
26:05it does
26:05not
26:06make
26:06you
26:06listen
26:06to
26:06mommy
26:07it
26:07does
26:07not
26:07make
26:07you
26:08listen
26:08to
26:08a
26:08hero
26:09man
26:09we gotta
26:09get that
26:10hero
26:10she
26:10out of
26:11our
26:11lives
26:11as
26:11well
26:12like
26:13we're
26:20so
26:21there's
26:21going
26:22for
26:22these
26:22years
26:23but
26:24as
26:24long
26:24as
26:24God
26:25keeps
26:25us
26:26as
26:26long
26:26as
26:26we
26:26stay
26:27pregnant
26:27as
26:28long
26:28as
26:28we
26:28can
26:28find
26:29some
26:29time
26:29to
26:29meditate
26:30and
26:32love
26:32our
26:33children
26:33as
26:33best
26:34we can
26:35and I
26:36think
26:36we're
26:36all
26:36the
26:36past
26:37right
26:38we're
26:39doing
26:39it
26:39right
26:39we're
26:40doing
26:40it
26:40the
26:40best
26:41of
26:41our
26:41ability
26:41and when
26:42you're
26:42in
26:42this
26:42space
26:43your
26:43children
26:43feel
26:44they
26:44feel
26:45they
26:45constant
26:46energy
26:46they feel
26:47love
26:47love
26:48I've been
26:52real
26:52with my
26:52babies
26:53more
26:53before
26:53my
26:53babies
26:54since
26:55they
26:56were
26:56still
26:59even
26:59to this
27:00day
27:00we pray
27:01before
27:01we go
27:01to sleep
27:02we pray
27:02before
27:02we wake
27:03before
27:03we wake
27:03up
27:03thank you
27:04Jesus
27:04all these
27:05things
27:05started
27:06instilling
27:06that
27:07into
27:07them
27:08it's
27:09never
27:09too early
27:10it's
27:11never
27:11too early
27:12to do
27:12that
27:12man
27:13this
27:13has
27:13been
27:13a
27:14great
27:14conversation
27:15I want
27:16to say
27:16to all
27:16the
27:17mamas
27:17and
27:17fathers
27:18out
27:18there
27:18give
27:19yourself
27:20a hug
27:20right
27:20now
27:20and say
27:21good
27:21job
27:22good
27:23job
27:24we're
27:25doing
27:26it
27:26we're
27:26killing
27:27it
27:27okay
27:28give
27:29yourself
27:29a
27:29pat
27:30on the
27:30back
27:30it's
27:32hard
27:32it's
27:33not
27:34easy
27:34but
27:35you
27:35are
27:35doing
27:36it
27:36even
27:36in
27:36your
27:36own
27:37way
27:38so
27:40say
27:40thank
27:41you
27:41to
27:41you
27:41give
27:42yourself
27:42all
27:43stars
27:43of
27:43time
27:44thank
27:44you
27:44so
27:45much
27:45for
27:46your
27:46time
27:46today
27:46ladies
27:47I hope
27:47you guys
27:48got a few
27:48nuggets
27:48I hope
27:50you guys
27:50enjoy the
27:50conversation
27:51and our
27:51transparency
27:52thank you
27:53for sharing
27:54with us
27:54today
27:55I learned
27:56so much
27:56from the
27:57health
27:57is
27:57together
27:58we are
27:58all in
27:59this
27:59together
27:59do you
28:00hear me
28:00it's good
28:01to have
28:01a job
28:02you tell us
28:02what
28:02that's
28:03in the
28:03crowd
28:03he's
28:03actually
28:04I'm
28:04like y'all
28:04are
28:04if you're
28:04part of
28:05it's
28:05like
28:05what
28:05happens
28:07when
28:07I don't
28:08know
28:08so
28:09give
28:09yourself
28:10a good
28:10job
28:10and thank
28:11you guys
28:11so much
28:12for joining
28:13this discussion
28:14with us
28:15today
28:15in the
28:15beauty
28:15part
28:16of it
28:16yes
28:17indeed
28:18we're talking
28:18to one of
28:19beauty
28:19green
28:19and you guys
28:20enjoy the
28:21rest of
28:21you
28:21blessed
28:22day
28:22alright
28:22thank
28:23you
28:23thank
28:24you
28:52thank
28:53you
Comments