- 6 weeks ago
After a paintball game goes wrong, their instructor Major Messy (really Lavatore, Mr. Ree’s brother) goes berserk and turns into Camoflush, and it's up to Mr. Toilette Ree (the janitor, former secret agent working for T.E.R.D.S., and was possessed by the super villain Splotch) to save the kids.
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PeopleTranscript
00:00This is George Beard and Harold Hutchins.
00:19George is the kid on the left with the tie and the flat top.
00:22Harold is the one on the right with the t-shirt and the bad haircut.
00:24Remember that now.
00:25Oh, and that's a mer-krupp.
00:32Half fish, half krupp, all wrong.
00:34Can you believe we're stuck making a mer-krupp while Krupp is kicking in on his yacht?
00:38Actually, he's not on his yacht.
00:39Javi's finishing the guacamere all.
00:44Krupp's having a better summer than we are.
00:46I mean, he got the jack yacht and we got jack squat.
00:49We should be kayaking or horse climbing.
00:52Or playing paintball.
00:53Like in those paintball commercials.
00:54Play paintball with Major Messi.
00:56It's war, but with paint and fun.
00:59Always wear protective eye gear.
01:00Too bad paintball is so expensive.
01:02Huh?
01:03Major Messi's paint and suffering mobile paintball.
01:05We bring the battle and all the gear to you.
01:08First battle's free.
01:10That's how we get them on the hook.
01:12Wait, are you still typing?
01:15Don't put that on the banner.
01:16Man, that's a real peek behind the banner making curtain.
01:19Ball!
01:20Ah!
01:22What the heck?
01:24Oh, my God!
01:34I'm Major Messi!
01:36Who wants to fight with paint for free?
01:38Yeah!
01:39I can't hear you!
01:40Yeah!
01:41Boom!
01:42You guys rock!
01:43Let's paint it up!
01:44Yeah!
01:44Just need an adult to sign this waiver for the steps at City Hall.
01:48And we're good to go.
01:49Uh, your plane?
01:52Yeah!
01:54Boom!
01:54So George and Hale made comic books.
01:56We're cool.
01:57Me too.
01:57Now they're summering at summer camp and Mr. Crump is true.
02:00Blah, blah, blah.
02:01Once they used, they hit no ring and first they made a dance.
02:04They accidentally cut on purpose, turned him into Captain Underpants.
02:07Strum along!
02:08With a snap, he's a captain flying through the trees.
02:11And don't forget when he hits right, you're sure to feel a swing.
02:14Blah, blah, blah.
02:15Put it all together, what could possibly go wrong?
02:18Now this is the end of the Captain Underpants song.
02:22Watch your beard inhale, punch and hug.
02:23True, I like hell!
02:24The Cunning Combat of the Covert Camouflage.
02:27Chapter One, Permission Flip.
02:29Overdue electric bill, extreme mayo, wigs quarterly.
02:34You're under arrest?
02:35Oh no!
02:36They're coming for us!
02:37Just like I said they would!
02:44Must destroy all evidence!
02:47Evidence of what?
02:50What are you doing here?
02:52I've been here all summer.
02:53Mr. Krupp, can we play paintball?
02:59No!
02:59Come on, it's free!
03:00Nothing's free!
03:01It's a trap, just like everything else.
03:03I'm okay.
03:04That's why the cops are on their way to railroad me into the hooskow!
03:09The what?
03:10The slammer!
03:11The what?
03:12The pokey!
03:13The what?
03:14The clink!
03:14The what?
03:15The stony lonesome!
03:17You mean jail?
03:19Yes!
03:20You're under arrest.
03:22By the pizza police?
03:24This is just a pizza coupon!
03:26Hmm.
03:26So can we play paintball?
03:27Now, now help me get everything out of the toilet.
03:32Oh no.
03:32Ah!
03:40Oh clammy boy, the pipes, the pipes are stalling.
03:47From room to room, and down the ground outside.
03:53All in favor of tricking Krupp into signing this waiver?
03:58Aye!
03:59Hey, how are we both in here?
04:00We share a brain, remember?
04:01Oh yeah.
04:02You're in a pickle here, Mr. Krupp.
04:04A big pickle.
04:05If the parents find out you flooded the camp, they'll level this place and build a mall.
04:09And then you'll be the director of making corn dogs.
04:11You're right, what do we do?
04:12Relax, you deal with the toilet, and we'll keep the kids quiet.
04:16Just sign this.
04:17It's a, uh, it's a standard release form giving us temporary emergency camp authority.
04:21Once again, George and Harold tricked Krupp into signing something he didn't read.
04:25Yes, that's my signature, but I didn't order an elephant.
04:29Now put a cork in those kids.
04:31And that's how you get a signed paintball waiver.
04:33So good.
04:34Are you ready?
04:41Yeah!
04:42Still can't hear you.
04:43Yeah!
04:44Hey, can you guys pipe down?
04:46I'm trying to order a jet pack for my brother.
04:48Uh, yes, deliver it today, please.
04:50A jet pack?
04:50That's awesome.
04:51Is it his birthday?
04:59No, we had a falling out years ago.
05:02I play fast and loose.
05:04He keeps it high and tight.
05:05But it's time to unburn that bridge.
05:07And as we all know, the first step towards healing is a jet pack.
05:12Anyway, who's ready for paintball?
05:14We are!
05:14We are!
05:15Paintball!
05:16It's finally happening.
05:17This summer just got a whole lot more summerer.
05:21Err.
05:24No paint, no game.
05:27What's a game?
05:27First, we gotta go over the rules.
05:30Hey, you think I like rules?
05:31Well, you are a major.
05:32I made your messy.
05:34That's a marketing hook.
05:36But I gotta follow the rules to keep my license.
05:38Chapter 2, Flotal Recall.
05:40Krupp called the only person he trusted with a toilet emergency.
05:43It's not so bad, right, Mr. Rhee?
05:45As you may recall, Mr. Rhee is the school janitor.
05:48He's also a former secret toilet agent and a former supervillain.
05:51But that's the past.
05:52It's worse than bad.
05:53These pipes are shot.
05:54You're gonna need a complete plumbover.
05:56Sounds expensive.
05:57There has to be a cheaper way.
05:58There is, but it's risky.
06:00Do it.
06:00Don't you want to hear the risks?
06:01Do it!
06:02It's your toilet, chief.
06:04Ah!
06:04Can I go back to my desk now?
06:06Ow!
06:12Rule 27.
06:13Make sure your socks are on at all times.
06:15Oh, I can almost touch the paint.
06:17Do we have to cover all the rules?
06:19Hey, you think I like this lady?
06:20So many rules!
06:22Look, it's for your own good, okay?
06:24Now, please remember to protect your armpits at all times.
06:27Paintball's not supposed to be about reading.
06:30Well, if we gotta read, let's at least read something fun.
06:32Chapter Three!
06:34Captain Underpants and the Covert Camouflage.
06:36By George Beard and Harold Hutchins.
06:38So...
06:40One time this kid, Keith, had a paintball party.
06:42His bowling parties are out.
06:44Bye, boys!
06:44But the kids had to learn paintball safety rules first.
06:47They were like, groan and snoring.
06:48I'd rather be doing chores.
06:51Maybe.
06:52And Captain Underpants was there, too, even though he wasn't invited.
06:54And Keith was like, do I know you?
06:56You're an adult!
06:57But Captain Underpants was too busy eating the cake, blah, blah.
06:59Even though it wasn't time yet.
07:01And chugging a gallon of fruit punch, blah.
07:03What?
07:04A gallon?
07:05Then Captain Underpants started playing paintball because it was a party, man.
07:08The kids were loving it.
07:09Swap, swap, swap, swap, swap, swap, swap, bing!
07:10B-b-bing!
07:11But Captain Underpants had to go real bad to fruit punch.
07:14And he found a portable toilet, which was actually an alien on vacation.
07:18Crazy, right?
07:18But get over it, because all bodies are beautiful.
07:21And Captain, I mean Keith, he's not a captain.
07:24And Keith called the alien Camouflage, because he was a jerk.
07:27Not the alien Keith, but also the alien.
07:30Because...
07:31Camouflage turned invisible like a magician.
07:33Put a reel, where'd he go?
07:35Oh, where'd he go?
07:36Where'd he go?
07:37And started hunting all the kids and saying,
07:38Slipperboard, get bloop, swap, swap.
07:40Which means who knows what, because alien dog.
07:42So Captain Underpants loaded up his skivvy slingshot with paintballs and...
07:46Swap, swap, swap, swap, swap, swap, swap, swap.
07:47The paint went everywhere.
07:48And he came up flush visible again like a fence.
07:52Then Captain Underpants gave him a tidy, weighty, good nighty, just a headlock that tucks you in like mom.
07:58Good night, mommy.
07:58I'm thirsty again.
07:59Please, really?
08:01And then the kids went back to having fun.
08:02The Captain Underpants left.
08:03Because he had three more birthday parties to crash.
08:06Okay, the end.
08:12What's that?
08:13Goatree in motion?
08:14It's a portable toilet.
08:15And until we take care of that clog, it's your only home.
08:17Now, the tank!
08:19What's in there?
08:19Poops.
08:21This was a mistake.
08:22No, Poops stands for Pipe Obstruction Obliteration Protocol System.
08:26It clears pipes, but it's experimental.
08:28Yeah, yeah, but it's cheap, right?
08:30Yes, but everything has a price.
08:32Oh, no.
08:33Not a flashback.
08:35After the toilet eliminator of really dangerous stuff or turds melted down, we knew we needed a way to clear any jam.
08:41So we made Poops to compliment turds.
08:44A real one-two punch.
08:46But my partner was reckless.
08:47A hot dog.
08:48A real restroom renegade.
08:49I told him Poops wasn't ready, but he wouldn't listen.
08:51So he dropped the hammer.
08:53And Poops hit the wall.
08:57When the smoke cleared, he was gone.
09:01That was the last time I saw him.
09:04Ever?
09:05Until Thanksgiving.
09:06But it was never the same.
09:08Anyway, I kept working on Poops.
09:10On my own, in private.
09:11It's ready.
09:12But Poops shouldn't be taken lightly.
09:14Yeah, yeah, yeah.
09:15Blah, blah, blah.
09:15Let her rip.
09:16Meanwhile, everyone was taking a break from reading their rule manuals and instead reading George and Harold's latest comic book, including Major Messy.
09:23How could I be so blind?
09:25I've become the enemy, you're a rule monger.
09:28Paintball isn't about rules.
09:29It's about fun.
09:31Take your binders and tear them in half.
09:33Impossible.
09:34You need a blowtorch.
09:35These binders are polypropylene.
09:36Yeah!
09:38I am a god!
09:41Duh.
09:42Too much?
09:42Yeah, no, that was too much.
09:43Like that.
09:44Come on, tear them.
09:47Tear them.
09:48Like that.
09:54Tear.
09:55Damn, tear them.
09:59And damn, tease, tear them.
10:02Tear.
10:03Damn, tear.
10:07One second thought.
10:08Throw them.
10:12It's too late for me to escape the rules of a slave to bureaucracy.
10:15Watch bureaucracy with a red tape.
10:18But not you kids.
10:20Now go have fun.
10:21Take risks.
10:22Make mistakes.
10:24But most importantly, live.
10:26Yeah!
10:27Live by the paint, die by the paint.
10:29Or just live by the paint.
10:31Woo!
10:32I'm going to live too.
10:33Fast and loose.
10:35Right after I go to the bathroom.
10:37That guy does drink a lot of coffee.
10:38No.
10:39No.
10:39But remember,
10:40Hup clogged every bathroom in the cave.
10:42Oh, no!
10:43Now stand back.
10:44I'm going to blast a truckload of poops into that toilet and hope for the best.
10:47Sounds good.
10:48What could go wrong?
10:49Find a hole!
10:53I'm not...
10:54Oh!
10:54Finally!
10:59What's happening?
11:00This won't end well.
11:02What happened to me?
11:12Do I have power?
11:13Do I have stealth power?
11:15How did this happen?
11:16Let's ask the science sock.
11:17Tint poops.
11:18Six clocks.
11:19Vanish.
11:19Oops.
11:20Plus pain.
11:20Plus major messy.
11:22Plus a portable toilet.
11:23Equals a toilet soldier with cloaking power.
11:26Now I have the power to paint over every rule on earth until none remain.
11:30I am a god.
11:33A paint god.
11:35All right, everybody.
11:36The rule is, if you're hit, you're out.
11:43I low expectations for myself were warranted.
11:46My skin may be green, but my rage is red.
11:54Red!
11:57Never mess with a...
11:58Go!
11:59Ow!
12:00Ow!
12:00This is fun.
12:02This is summer.
12:03This is paintball.
12:05Wait, are you sure we got everybody?
12:06I feel like we're missing someone.
12:09Erica!
12:13Color you surprised?
12:15Yes!
12:16I've been waiting to say that for hours.
12:18All right, Erica wins.
12:19New game!
12:21Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voicemail system.
12:25It's me, your brother.
12:27I want you to know I've changed.
12:30And now, I'm going to change the world.
12:33I'm raising an army of rule breakers to defeat the rule makers.
12:38And you know what?
12:38I hope that jet pack I sent you gets lost in the mail.
12:42You guaranteed this would work.
12:44I said the exact opposite many times.
12:46Well, what do we do now?
12:47Now, we clean up the mess.
12:49Like, with a mop?
12:50Chapter four.
12:51You paint seen nothing yet.
12:53Sophie one, wear this to blend in.
12:55Other Sophie, wear this to stand out.
12:57Bossy, glossy, and mossy.
13:05Go nuts.
13:06Let's, like, shoot these paint balls at whatever we want.
13:11Yes, break all the rules.
13:15But easy on the paint, it's not cheap.
13:19You were smart to form an alliance with me.
13:22There's just one catch.
13:24Betrayal!
13:25It serves me right for trusting another living soul.
13:30Instant karma.
13:35Moonbeam goggles cut loose.
13:38Yes, loose cannons.
13:43Cannonball rules are for fools.
13:46And all good energy.
13:48But we've got to save that paint.
13:50Drop the paint, Erika.
14:02No, you drop the paint.
14:04How about we all drop the paint?
14:06Okay, on three.
14:07One, two, three.
14:11Guess we're all getting painted.
14:12That's right, by me.
14:14Whoa, it's major messy.
14:16But he looks like camouflage from our comic.
14:18Camo Flush.
14:19I like that.
14:21A new name for the new me.
14:23No more ranks, no more rules,
14:25and no more waiting a half hour after lunch to swim.
14:28But why are you wearing a portable toilet?
14:30And how'd you get invisible?
14:31All your questions will be answered after you join my army.
14:35I wouldn't do that.
14:36It's three against one.
14:38We've got the numbers.
14:39Wrong.
14:41Um, I think he's got the numbers.
14:44What did you do to our friends?
14:45I made them lean, mean painting machines.
14:49And you're next.
14:50Our army is going to wipe out rules forever.
14:53I hate rules as much as anybody.
14:55But you crossed the line, man.
14:56Plus, I mean, armies don't work without discipline.
14:59Wrong.
14:59Toilet troops.
15:00Ready?
15:02Aim.
15:02I didn't say fire.
15:04What are you shooting at?
15:06You're out of control.
15:07They disappeared?
15:09But that's my thing.
15:10Toilet troops, find them.
15:12And stop wasting paint.
15:14Sorry for the smoke.
15:16My restroom reflexes kicked in when I saw that walking toilet ambush you.
15:19That's actually Major Messi.
15:21So he's military.
15:22No, he's the paintball guy.
15:24And probably not a real major.
15:26Paint?
15:26I was afraid of this.
15:28It all started earlier today.
15:30I was filling Mr. Krupp's toilet with poops.
15:32Nope.
15:33We are not doing a bathroom flashback.
15:35Also, you can't do a flashback from today.
15:37Yeah, flashbacks have rules, man.
15:39Poop stands for Pipe Obstruction Obliteration Protocol System.
15:42Your acronym game needs work.
15:44Point is, some of the poops must have combined with his paint and turned him into a living stealth weapon.
15:49It's just science.
15:50Don't look at me.
15:51I'm just a sock.
15:53We need to get Captain Underpants before Camo Flush finds us.
15:55So you two take Captain Underpants while Mr. Rhee and I take Camo Flush.
16:00For a spin.
16:01Like driver morale?
16:04No, because Flush.
16:06Spin.
16:07You know what?
16:08Forget it.
16:09Dry land.
16:10I know it's out there.
16:12And I'm gonna find it.
16:14I'm gonna find it!
16:16Mr. Krupp?
16:18Wait.
16:19Harold, look.
16:20Please keep out.
16:23Bathroom is flooded.
16:24We can do better.
16:26Krupp smells of bad feet.
16:28I like it.
16:31Brother liquid!
16:33Captain Underpants, there's a super toilet guy who can turn invisible.
16:36And he's making an army!
16:37Is it Toilet Tuesday already?
16:39We should head over to Tara's Toilet Tower for all-you-can-eat toilets.
16:42Oh, that's not a thing.
16:44Spoke too soon.
16:44Do you have a hunger for toilets?
16:46Then come on down to Tara's Toilet Tower.
16:49Right now!
16:50Because eating toilets is...
16:51Totally normal!
16:52Nice.
16:53Now stop him!
16:54Okie dokie, fried egg yokey.
16:56Because if there's one thing I can stop, it's a toilet!
16:59Am I done being a paddleboard?
17:08I think we bought George and Harold all the time they need.
17:11And I'm tired of running from a toilet!
17:12So let's stop running and start painting!
17:20Your paint may make us visible, but our paint will make you...
17:25I can't...
17:27I can't...
17:28Toilet?
17:29Lavator?
17:30Is that you?
17:31You guys know each other, Mr. Rhee?
17:33Yes.
17:34He's my brother.
17:36Hold on.
17:37His name is Lavator Rhee, and your name is Toilet Rhee?
17:42It's pronounced Toilet.
17:44And yes, our parents were French-Canadian.
17:46And they loved bathrooms.
17:48We were also research partners until I quit due to scientific differences.
17:54You blew up poops!
17:55Because there were too many rules!
17:57But that'll change when we paint the rule mongers into Toilet Troops!
18:01Cops, teachers, even lifeguards!
18:04That is not you talking, Lavator!
18:06That's the poop!
18:07Bloodlines!
18:08Join me, Toilet.
18:09Together we'll break the rules until the only rule is no rules!
18:13But that's a rule!
18:15What are you doing?
18:16What are you doing?
18:17I can't fight my brother.
18:18But I can't outrun him!
18:19Gah!
18:20Gah!
18:21Gah!
18:22Gah!
18:23Gah!
18:24Gah!
18:25Missed him!
18:26You're playing cards?
18:27Why didn't you paint him?
18:28Gah!
18:29Maybe an army of rule breakers was a bad idea!
18:31I'm here to chew gum and flush toilets!
18:36And I swallowed my gum!
18:37Oh!
18:38A painting party!
18:39You're not allowed to use paint, remember?
18:41I'm gonna paint this whole town red!
18:43I'm gonna paint paint paint until I'm dead!
18:45A boop scoop doop doop choo-doop ball!
18:47A la la la la doop doop doop doop doop doop!
18:49You like paint, huh?
18:50Toilet troops!
18:51Now's your chance!
18:52Paint at will!
18:53Sorry!
18:54I'm on paint probation, so let's play dodge paint instead!
18:58Whoa!
18:59Chapter 5, the incredibly graphic violence chapter in Hide-O-Rama.
19:03Because if you're hiding, you're not fighting.
19:06A bush!
19:07Nature's hiding spot!
19:08Whoa!
19:09Hot dog cart!
19:10The perfect place to hide, unless you're a hot dog!
19:14Whoa!
19:15Ooh!
19:16A toilet and a hiding spot!
19:18Two birds, one bladder!
19:20Whoa!
19:21He's like an obese eel with legs!
19:23I had eel at the tuna tyrant!
19:25Mmm!
19:26Mmm!
19:27Whoa!
19:28Whoa!
19:40Whoa!
19:41It's like looking in a mirror!
19:43Oh no!
19:44They're gonna paint the town red!
19:46And I'm the town!
19:48Red!
19:50Whoa!
19:51Whoa!
19:52Whoa!
19:53Whoa!
19:54Whoa!
19:55Whoa!
19:56Whoa!
19:57Whoa!
19:58Whoa!
19:59Whoa!
20:00It's over!
20:01You're gonna help me repaint the world into a rule-free paradise!
20:04Because like you said, live by the paint, die by the paint!
20:08Yeah!
20:09Well, we also say, if you're gonna go down!
20:11Go down painting!
20:12Yeah!
20:13Ha!
20:14Woo-hoo!
20:15Paint party!
20:16Really wish you guys would exercise more paint control, but let's move forward.
20:21And this is where the rules end, and the paint begins!
20:25Whoa!
20:26What?
20:27Hey!
20:28Hey!
20:29You got the jetpack!
20:30And you're flying it without a helmet!
20:32Very un-new of you!
20:33Yes, Lavator, you were right!
20:35Rules are made to be broken!
20:36From now on, I'm flying by the seat of my pants!
20:39No more stopping at stop signs!
20:41No more reading instruction manuals before operating dangerous jetpacks!
20:45Yes!
20:46That's what I-
20:47You didn't read the manual?
20:48Not a word!
20:49Well, that's the spirit!
20:51You-you filled it with fuel, right?
20:53Nope, because that's a rule!
20:54And I no longer play by the rules!
21:01Well, not-not all rules are bad!
21:03No, this is what you wanted!
21:05A world without rules, right?
21:06So, this is it, huh?
21:08Yeah, but at least there aren't any rules, right?
21:11No!
21:12I was wrong!
21:13Loose cannons are a nightmare!
21:15Bring back the rules!
21:17Bra-la-la!
21:19You guys want a pencil and a hike for next Saturday?
21:22Noonish?
21:23Oh!
21:24Wait!
21:25Why didn't the paint change you?
21:26Because he's covered in PLOPS!
21:28PLOPS stands for Paint Limiting Override Protocol System.
21:31It's a variation of poops I developed to paint-proof pipes!
21:34And we use PLOPS to paint-proof Captain Underpants as pre-painted powder!
21:37Wow, that's a lot of pee!
21:39We're covered in PLOPS, too!
21:40Can we call it anything else?
21:42Can I take this baby for a spin?
21:46Isn't that thing out of gas?
21:47It is.
21:48We need to unpaint those guys!
21:50You think PLOPS can make everyone regular again?
21:52Worth a shot!
21:53How did it work?
21:54Chapter 6, to make a long story short, it did.
21:57I take it all back, Toilette!
21:59You were right!
22:00Rules are important!
22:01Yes, I know.
22:02That's why I almost killed us both.
22:04To teach you that.
22:05Whoa!
22:06Yeah!
22:11And Captain Underpants?
22:13He didn't read the jet pack manual either.
22:15Also, it actually was out of gas.
22:17Boom!
22:18Boom!
22:19Boom!
22:20Ahhhh!
22:21Why am I wet?
22:22And where is my jack-yacht?
22:24Oh!
22:25No!
22:26My jack-yacht is Jack Squat!
22:31Javi, you're alive!
22:33Quack!
22:34Javi, you're an angel!
22:36You're an angel!
23:06You're an angel!
23:36You're an angel!
24:06You're an angel!
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