- 21 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00I'm Elise. You're Barbara. I've seen you in my fine arts class.
00:09I came here to be a protest artist.
00:11Camel!
00:12Shut the fuck up!
00:13Why are you ever reacting?
00:14Where are our rights?
00:15Let him film, you fugly dog!
00:17Fuck the patriarchy!
00:18Kill all men!
00:20Go teach him a lesson.
00:21Go fucking gorilla shit.
00:24Detectives confirmed the victim was footballer Scott Nichols.
00:28We have to go to the base.
00:29No way.
00:30They'll think we did it.
00:31We buried the evidence.
00:32They won't find anything.
00:33We got away with it.
00:59Over and over again.
01:01Children's Joke's armpits.
01:02In the middle of the night.
01:03Fuck off with these jokes.
01:04And your picket fence.
01:05I like being choked without pretense.
01:08You can hide behind your clothes like nobody knows.
01:12Call me Wednesday Adams.
01:16Say, Adams, I'm a cheeky fright.
01:18Mistress to your madam on a Friday night.
01:21Hide my number in your phone, like nobody knows.
01:29Oh, Nicole, I'm so sorry.
01:31I'll clean all this up, I promise.
01:34Look, I really do think maybe...
01:37You got the wrong first.
01:39Impression, no!
01:41Babs, hey, what the fuck?
01:49You missed yoga this morning.
01:50Yeah, sorry, I was hanging with Rory.
01:52Yeah, how's he holding up?
01:54We bet he must be super lost without Scott.
01:57Yeah, he is, he's super lost.
02:00Who the fuck would do that?
02:02He's like, yes, okay, Scott was a groper,
02:04but only when he was drunk.
02:05Right?
02:06That's those angry-ass feminists.
02:08They always take things too far.
02:10It's like, remember when they changed all of the signs on the toilets
02:13and then no one knew which one to use?
02:15Yes, like, what the hell even is an all-gender ambulance?
02:17What does it mean?
02:18It's so fucking annoying.
02:20Is it Rory?
02:21Yes, it is.
02:23He wants me to come back to his room, so...
02:25Aww.
02:26Yeah.
02:27Go to him, we'll just meet you guys at the kick.
02:29The kick?
02:30Um, isn't that meant to be at the end of the season?
02:32Oh, he didn't tell you.
02:34Um, well, Rory's doing it for Scott this afternoon as symbolism.
02:38Yeah.
02:39Babe, you're coming, right?
02:40Of course I am.
02:41Yes.
02:42I'll be there.
02:43Yes.
02:44Okay, yep.
02:45This is a day, just like any other.
02:46So, see you soon.
02:47Well, what?
02:48Let's not...
02:53Hey!
02:55Don't take him!
02:56Don't take him!
02:57Shoot!
02:58Get away from that dog!
02:59Right now!
03:00Away!
03:01Right now!
03:02Hello!
03:03Hello!
03:04Does anyone own this dog?
03:08Does anyone want this dog?
03:14This was a truly senseless act.
03:17We have lost a beloved student,
03:20and the integrity of one of our most esteemed heritage listed statues.
03:27I want to assure you that the investigation is in safe hands,
03:33as it's been led by a detective who, 15 years ago,
03:37brought down the McKinnon crime family.
03:40The great man himself, Stuart Roach.
03:43Good.
03:44That was a long time ago.
03:53Thank you, Vice-Chancellor.
03:55Well, but for now,
03:58we have detained an individual for questioning.
04:02We will leave no stone unturned.
04:05So that's good.
04:07Cheers.
04:08Will this affect student enrollment?
04:11I can assure the student body that they will find those responsible.
04:18Then put them away for life.
04:23What did I miss?
04:41I didn't do it, you fucks!
04:54I keep telling you I passed out and someone put this shit on me.
04:57I don't know, sir.
04:58I'm sort of inclined to believe her.
05:01She was found covered in red paint.
05:03She has radical anti-male beliefs,
05:05and earlier on that day she had an altercation with the victim
05:07as witnessed by a police officer.
05:09Yeah, but I know her.
05:10Yeah?
05:11She's pretty direct.
05:12I feel like if she did it, she would honestly just tell us.
05:15I wish I killed him!
05:16If I did, I would have done it twice!
05:19And that doesn't even make sense.
05:21It's not just Prue.
05:22I've had countless complaints about Scott.
05:24He was a bully and a rapist with a drinking problem.
05:26Well, we should have forensics back later today,
05:28then we'll see whether it puts Prue anywhere near the body.
05:31So rest up, I reckon.
05:40So at some point, are you going to explain the dog?
05:43He was digging around the evidence.
05:46Christ!
05:47Can you at least try to keep it together today?
05:49Sorry, I think I've run out of vomit.
05:51No, it's just noise.
05:59Who sent it?
06:00Was it the killer?
06:01What did I just say?
06:02Hey, maybe it's time we go to the cops.
06:03Okay, or if we can't do that,
06:05maybe we try and find the killer
06:06before we go down from...
06:07I have a lot on today, okay?
06:08This is just one more small problem,
06:10and then everything will be back to normal.
06:13Two small problems.
06:15It's fine, it's fine.
06:17We were wearing masks,
06:18and the first thing we did was paint over the camera.
06:20What about the other cameras on campus?
06:23The swamp bar.
06:24That's just us getting drunk.
06:26The art space.
06:36Shit.
06:38I'm guessing there's definitely a camera in there, then.
06:40She saw me put the key back yesterday,
06:41so it's probably suss if I'm hanging around again.
06:43I thought you said nobody saw you.
06:44Yeah, I lied. Sorry, okay?
06:47I'll go in the back. You text when they're going.
06:49No, no, no. We should stay off our phones for security.
06:51I got us these.
06:53The box says ages 6 to 11,
06:55but the range is legit.
06:57They're super sturdy.
06:59And you just had these in your bag?
07:01Yeah, always.
07:02My mum and I used to chat when I was working at the deli.
07:12Right, so what time can we expect them?
07:14Well, a competent team would be here...
07:20Hey, mum. What's up?
07:21Elise! What the bloody hell's going on?
07:24A boy is dead!
07:26When you didn't call back, I was so worried.
07:28I thought something had happened.
07:29It says kill all men everywhere.
07:31I don't think I'm their target.
07:32Oh, that poor boy.
07:34Oh, and his doodle.
07:35You look chalky, darling.
07:39Have you been anxiety-wrenching again?
07:41No, no, no, I'm fine.
07:42My friend and I, we're just working on a special art project
07:45and it is, er...
07:46Okay.
07:47It's super stressful.
07:48Well...
07:49Yeah.
07:50What friend is this?
07:53Okay, mum, I have to go.
07:54Wait, wait, Elise. Elise, did you get the...
07:55Oh, Barbara, they've gone.
08:05Yeah?
08:06Thanks for the text.
08:094pm.
08:10Today.
08:11What?
08:13One thing at a time.
08:15One thing at a time.
08:16I haven't seen any cameras.
08:17Maybe we finally caught a break.
08:18I am so fucked.
08:25Why are you fucked?
08:30Well, because of the murder.
08:32They're gonna see me creating my cuties.
08:38Er...
08:39So, what's the problem?
08:41When I create, I go into a deep trance-like state
08:44and often come out changed.
08:46And sometimes, there's liquid.
08:49Okay, so you hump the animals.
08:51No, because most of the liquid is tears.
08:56Oh.
08:57Pleasure to meet you.
09:00So, Peter.
09:01Ivan.
09:02Ideally, the cops, when they get to the camera,
09:05there'll be no memory card in it, right?
09:06All the same card would be in there,
09:08but I would have taken it out and microwaved it for 22 seconds.
09:11What's holding you back from doing this?
09:12Well, I need help reaching the camera
09:14when Phoenix is not around,
09:16but he comes through here all the time.
09:18I... I guess we could help you with your plan.
09:21Really?
09:22Of course.
09:24Would you excuse us a moment?
09:28Oh, may I?
09:29Oh, yeah, of course.
09:31One of us distracts Phoenix,
09:33the other helps the animals...
09:34I'll distract Phoenix.
09:36The mission.
09:37I mean, I will take one for the team
09:39and, yeah, I'll distract Phoenix.
09:41Have you got a crush on Phoenix?
09:44What?
09:45No.
09:46Gross.
09:47He's a self-congratulatory fake feminist
09:49with a non-intimidating jawline.
09:51Yeah, exactly.
09:52So, who wants to spend any time with him then?
09:54I will take the shite job.
09:56Okay, okay, fine, fine, fine.
09:57You take Phoenix.
09:58Just, you're gonna have to lean into...
10:01seduction.
10:02Yeah, you should do it.
10:03Mm-hmm.
10:04Yeah.
10:05Yeah.
10:06You should do it.
10:07Mm-hmm.
10:08Yeah.
10:09You should do it.
10:10Mm-hmm.
10:11Yeah.
10:12Mm-hmm.
10:13Yeah.
10:24Professor?
10:26Hey!
10:29I was wondering if we could talk about my assignment.
10:34Um, yeah, of course.
10:35My door is always open.
10:36Literally.
10:37Yeah?
10:38Yeah, thanks to the open door mandate
10:40after Professor Walter's misconduct.
10:43Should we get a coffee?
10:49Oh, my God.
10:50Please be quiet.
10:52I think he's scared of the latter.
10:54He'd make an awesome dog cockroach.
10:57Shush up, dog.
10:58Someone's gonna hear you.
10:59You need to be an alpha.
11:00Stop.
11:01Now.
11:07In animal packs,
11:08the alpha is the pack leader.
11:10That should be you.
11:11But the dog knows
11:12that you don't have any alpha energy.
11:15Yes, I do.
11:19Sit.
11:20You're a postmodern artist.
11:21I've always seen social media as the Louvre of the modern world.
11:35Da Vinci, Rubens, Barbara.
11:36Your profile is your canvas.
11:37You seem distracted, Barbara.
11:38It's Rory, isn't it?
11:39This little tantrum in class the other day.
11:40Look, he's a nice kid and all, but you don't need all that drama.
11:41We're fine.
11:42It's just our thing, you know?
11:51You seem distracted, Barbara.
11:55It's Rory, isn't it?
11:57This little tantrum in class the other day.
12:00Look, he's a nice kid and all,
12:02but you don't need all that drama.
12:04We're fine.
12:05It's just our thing, you know?
12:08Well, maybe you need someone more mature.
12:14My wife is six years older than me,
12:16and she is the absolute best.
12:18What's the time?
12:26Probably looking for me.
12:28Yeah, I'm supposed to get back to the art space
12:30for when the facilities team arrives at 3.30.
12:32Oh, well, shouldn't you just get back there, then?
12:36Oh, no, no, in a second.
12:37This is more important.
12:39Have you ever been bouldering?
12:41Yeah.
12:44Ivan, pull your pants up.
12:46I think that's Stark.
12:48Oh, oh.
12:52Ivan, we need to hurry.
12:53Just maybe I try to go back up again.
12:57Oh, my God, Ivan!
13:03Oh, my God, there you are.
13:05I'm so sorry, girl.
13:06I'm just in the middle of something.
13:09What is more important than this, babe?
13:10Okay, I know.
13:12I need to be there for Rory.
13:13I know.
13:13This is bigger than Rory, Babs.
13:15Okay, Scott's gone.
13:16So they need a new buck and dough,
13:17and we've heard that it's between you and Rory and...
13:19And me and Stretch.
13:22Which is, like, absolutely heartbreaking,
13:23because I could never choose between the both of you.
13:28The dough.
13:28Hey, Bab, you've got your coffee.
13:33Oh, my God, what's the actual beer?
13:35Oh, my God, it's so embarrassing if you want to get it.
13:36Okay, yeah, come on, let's go.
13:38We get it.
13:39Hey, girls.
13:40Hi, Professor.
13:42Oh, my God, what is happening?
13:43Ew.
13:46Okay.
13:47If I was to build you out of clay...
13:49I don't want to know about it.
13:51I'd make you a half mouse, half wolf,
13:53because on the outside, you look pathetic.
13:55Dude, this isn't helping.
13:56But on the inside, you are strong like a wolf.
13:58Oh, I got it.
14:00There you go.
14:01There you go.
14:02You got it.
14:03Oh, no.
14:04I dropped it.
14:07Ivan.
14:08Oh, no.
14:08We need to go.
14:09Okay.
14:09Get the card.
14:13I can't see it.
14:15Okay.
14:15Okay, come on.
14:24Can I have a little bit of...
14:26Space?
14:26Oh, please.
14:30No!
14:31I just mean,
14:32why don't we show these guys the store for a minute?
14:34The facilities are so amazing.
14:42Hey.
14:43Whatever model inspires is the right...
14:45Please.
14:47That is so right.
14:50I think you should talk about it.
14:53Like...
14:53What the hell? Is that a dog?
15:12Oh, I have no idea what he's doing in here.
15:15You're a dinner wolf mouse.
15:16I became the alpha.
15:17...as a kind of little quick fix, which was quite cool, because it meant that we could kick the class.
15:23I should probably head off, too. Bye.
15:26Hey, if you have time, I'd love to walk you through some animal mash-ups I've been working on.
15:32I have to go.
15:40Do you reckon the blackmailer thinks we did the art or the murder too?
15:44Either way, I'm ready.
15:45Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
15:48No, I feel amazing. My gagging's stopped.
15:51I guess when you master your alpha, you master your body.
15:54Calm down, Vin Diesel, okay? We need this sordid stat. I need to get to Rory's memorial kick.
15:58Why?
15:59I need to be there if I'm going to be the doe.
16:01What's that?
16:02It makes me the leader of my college. It's basically the reason for my existence.
16:08Uh, team's still trolling through the CCTV, but half of the cameras don't even have a backup guard.
16:13Bugger.
16:15How many buttons can a kid eat before you start to worry?
16:18What?
16:19Well, my kid found a way into my wife's cardigan. It's really colourful.
16:24Forensics came back?
16:25Yeah, so Scott's death came through the head wound and the body was placed at the quad 12 hours after the killing.
16:34Any evidence that Prue was there?
16:36Not at this stage.
16:37Great. So we can let her go?
16:39No, I think that we keep it for as long as we're allowed, right? Just in case.
16:44Oh, and there was a size 11 men's footprint right next to the body.
16:49So we could be looking at a male killer?
16:53I mean, maybe, but it seems unlikely, considering the artwork. I mean, it's probably post-contamination.
16:59Oh. Hey, um, I've been seeing a female student on campus. I don't have much, but I do have a strong gut feeling.
17:18Nah, let's just wait until we see the rest of the CCTV, okay?
17:27Listen. The McKinnon case.
17:31Yes.
17:32The reason you're famous.
17:34Yeah, I was watching some old interviews with you and you seem pretty different now.
17:43I just feel like maybe you used to be someone who would trust a gut feeling.
17:47You go first, because let's assume they don't know you're involved.
17:53Okay.
17:55Yes, go about the space, text me if it's not safe, and be ready to call the cops if things go bad.
18:01Copy that. Let's use this.
18:06Can we text on them, or do we just need to announce our intentions to everyone around us?
18:13I'll go first.
18:14I'll go first.
18:15I'll go first.
18:16I'll go first.
18:17I'll go first.
18:18I'll go first.
18:19What the fuck?
18:23What the fuck?
18:46There's no one in here.
18:48What kind of blackmailer makes an appointment?
18:50It doesn't keep it.
18:53Barbara.
18:53Now's not a good time, Jenny.
18:57Why did you take down my crochet guard on post?
19:02Seriously?
19:03Fuck off, Jenny.
19:04Okay, we're in the middle of some main character shit right now.
19:06Hey, Barbara.
19:07What?
19:08I think it's Jenny.
19:10You took down my crochet guard on post.
19:13I saw it gone when I woke up.
19:15You think you can get away with it?
19:17Now I'm going to tell the world the truth.
19:21What truth, Jenny?
19:22That you lent us some stockings.
19:24Are you sure the crochet community is ready for such a huge revelation?
19:27I came into the bathroom.
19:29One of you wasn't wearing pants.
19:31Then I sent her a ransom letter and both of you turn up.
19:36Which means...
19:37A secret love affair between a Dutch exchange student and an influencer who is pretending
19:42to be straight, therefore cheating on her jock love boy.
19:46I'm British.
19:46Making love in a toilet.
19:49Putting red dots all over their clothes.
19:54Classic lesbians.
19:56Jenny, what do you think a lesbian is?
19:58Can you just...
20:00Can you just give us a second?
20:01She has all the evidence they need to convict us.
20:07But still, she has no idea what she's talking about.
20:09Okay, but what's worse?
20:10Elise, someone smart who we can reason with are a total fucking wildcard.
20:14I'm not putting her dumb shit on my feet again.
20:16Don't worry.
20:16Jenny, I've got this.
20:21These are my demands.
20:23One post of Fortnite about the benefit of...
20:25Jenny, two things are going to happen.
20:28The first, Barbara and I are going to come out and tell everyone that we're in a committed
20:31relationship.
20:33We are.
20:33We are.
20:34And you'll be cancelled for life for queer shaming us.
20:36And the entire internet will boycott your flowers.
20:40And the second is this.
20:44Scary.
20:54Sorry.
20:54I just laughed about being a dog, Alpha.
20:57They're going to deport me.
21:00I don't like crochet flowers either.
21:02But I can't afford the yarn.
21:04When I left my province, the agent was fraudulent.
21:08I thought the money I gave him was for my tuition.
21:10But he took it all.
21:11And now I can't afford to be here.
21:14Selling my garden is my only income.
21:17I'm a desperate.
21:19But please, don't cancel me.
21:22I will leave your love alone.
21:24type in your bank details.
21:26Type in your bank details.
21:56Why did you do that? She said she was gonna leave us alone.
22:05Anyway, I guess we did it.
22:07Camera evidence gone, blackmailer nullified, life feels pretty normal again.
22:11Okay, what if Prue tells a cop she saw us that night?
22:13When is Jenny gonna figure out what those red splotches mean?
22:15I mean, really, anyone could have seen us that night.
22:20I thought you said...
22:21No, you were right, you were right, okay? This is just gonna keep coming at us.
22:24There's only one way to get our lives back.
22:29You're all good, Rory. We'll get out of here.
22:31Oh, shit.
22:32Good story, Rory.
22:33All right, move on.
22:34Hey, just stay tight, please.
22:36Excuse me, I have a mic.
22:38That could be my phone. Can you stop it?
22:40No, wait.
22:41No, wait.
22:42No, wait.
22:43No, wait.
22:44No, wait.
22:45No, wait.
22:46No, wait.
22:47No, wait.
22:48No, wait.
22:49No.
22:50Just stay tight, please.
22:51No, you can't cover it.
22:52Excuse me, I have a mic.
22:53That could be my phone. Can you stop it?
22:57No, wait.
22:58Just put that out.
22:59You can be on the side.
23:01Whoa, whoa, whoa.
23:03Get back.
23:04Get back.
23:05Get back.
23:06Get back.
23:07Let's go out.
23:08We need to find this psycho, we need to take her to jail, and get our fucking lives back.
23:38Do it, do it, do it, do it.
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