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The Death of Bunny Munro Season 1 Episode 3


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Transcript
00:00scenes of a sexual nature and scenes which some viewers may find distressing.
00:05Please be aware that this program also contains themes of suicide.
01:00I dreamt too calm in the night, but I looked and weren't there.
01:24Just a dream.
01:27I know.
01:30I'm sorry.
01:41Come to think of it, mate.
01:44I had a pretty weird dream too.
01:48Yeah?
01:48I, uh, pretty weird, all right?
01:54I dreamt that someone told me that they hated being a shitty navigator.
01:59I wanted to be a salesman.
02:03Wild.
02:04Oh, dad.
02:05Oh, my God, it was real.
02:14What do you reckon then?
02:22You ready?
02:22No.
02:23Good a time as any.
02:25Okay.
02:26We've got to be crying though, can't we?
02:31Hey?
02:32Hey.
02:33Not going to look too good, is it?
02:41Please, can you buy more stuff?
02:43Not going to go down well, is it?
02:47No.
02:48No.
02:49Well then.
02:50You know, my old man was in antiques.
02:57When I was little, he used to take me out in his van, find some run-down old place, a real drum.
03:03Owned by some rich biddy with a load of filthy cats and he'd go in.
03:07And honestly, before I had time to finish my sandwich, out he'd come with a nice little queen-hand dressing table.
03:18Yeah, you're the gift, my old man.
03:21The talent.
03:22He taught it to me.
03:24And now, I'm handing that to you.
03:30You understand?
03:35Okay.
03:37Oh, Christ.
03:47Didn't happen to notice the Hulk creep in and beat the crap out of me last night, did you?
03:53Right ready, Mr. Salesman.
04:00One more time.
04:01We have here on offer the finest range of creams, lotions,
04:07And you'll find this.
04:08And you'll find this.
04:09And you'll find this.
04:10And you'll find this.
04:11Colour.
04:12Colour.
04:13Collour.
04:14With elastic.
04:15Elastin rich.
04:16Elastin rich.
04:17Elastin rich cream, which will improve your skin smoothness and make you look younger.
04:23But, what if I forget?
04:25Well then, make up.
04:26Remember, she's not buying the product, she's buying you.
04:30And who are you?
04:31Who the fuck are you?
04:32I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:33That's absolutely fucking right.
04:34Tell me again.
04:35I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:36I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:37I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:38I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:39Oh, baby.
04:40It's a commitment.
04:41It's a commitment, baby.
04:42Tell me again.
04:43I'm Bonnie Monroe!
04:44I'm Bonnie Monroe!
04:46Oh, baby.
04:49It's a commitment.
04:53It's a commitment, baby.
04:56I don't know why I'm going like it.
05:03I don't know why I'm going like it.
05:06I don't know why I'm going like it.
05:11It's a commitment.
05:16We gotta love one another or die, brother.
05:21We gotta love one another or die.
05:24Oh, baby.
05:29Cause it's super glue.
05:31It's super glue.
05:33It's super glue.
05:35It's super glue.
05:39Knock him down.
05:41Knock him down.
05:43Knock him down.
05:45You'll find this collagen.
05:51And elastin rich cream will improve moisture up to 300%.
06:03But I don't think you need it.
06:09Actually, Dad, I think we've got the wrong house.
06:13Okay, I can't cope.
06:15Take my money.
06:17Really?
06:18I'd buy a dose of poison off you, you little cutie.
06:21I have two bottles.
06:23Okay.
06:24Okay.
06:25You know what?
06:26When you see that, Dad and his boy just...
06:30We just get to be.
06:31You know?
06:32Right here.
06:36Where?
06:37Right, mate.
06:50Why don't you go and wait outside while I take care of the boring old paperwork, yeah?
06:54Okay, Dad.
06:56It was nice to meet you.
06:58Hey.
07:00What I mean.
07:02Thanks, Dad.
07:04Oh, God.
07:08So cute.
07:12Is that your dad in my house?
07:33We're salesmen.
07:37He's given a one.
07:39He's the best salesman in the world.
07:41He could sell your bicycle to a barracuda.
07:44For what?
07:47It's a predatory fish.
07:49Its jaws are armed with hundreds of razor-like teeth.
07:53Oh.
07:56You can hear it from miles away.
07:58She sounds like a strangled chicken.
08:04My mum died.
08:05I wish my mum would die.
08:09I wish my mum would die.
08:11I wish my mum would die.
08:13I wish my mum would die.
08:16You all right, Tony?
08:18What, your trouble?
08:21Fucks sake!
08:22For fuck's sake.
08:36Is that your dad?
08:44That's Tony.
08:45He's mum's boyfriend.
08:49What's he like?
08:51He's alright, I guess.
08:52Donna!
08:52Dad bought me this.
08:56The bike?
08:58No, just the bell.
08:59It's a really cool bell.
09:02You think so?
09:04Yeah, it's great.
09:07Junior!
09:12Junior, get in the car!
09:16Hello?
09:20Bye, then.
09:21Bye!
09:21Bye, then.
09:22Bye, then.
09:23Bye, then.
09:24Okay.
09:25Yeah, look like this.
09:26Come on!
09:27I'm sorry, all right, guys?
09:28Yep.
09:29Everything's absolutely fucking perfect, my boy.
09:32What a special fucking crazy!
09:34I'll go for down in the left!
09:35Fuck!
09:36Fuck this!
09:37I'm telling you, buddy boy, nothing like getting your pipes cleaned first thing in the morning.
09:45Who was your mate?
09:46She just came and talked to me.
09:47Oh, right.
09:48She just came and talked to me.
09:49Oh, right.
09:50Fancy her, did she?
09:51Dad.
09:52All right.
09:53She did, though.
09:54I can tell.
09:55She had that special light in her eyes.
09:56Yeah?
09:57Yeah.
09:58Telling you, buddy boy, I can spot it a mile off.
09:59Maybe I should give her one.
10:00Well, one day, buddy boy.
10:01One day.
10:02So, where are we going next?
10:03I don't know.
10:04I don't know.
10:05I can tell you.
10:06I can tell you, buddy boy.
10:07I can spot it a mile off.
10:08Maybe I should give her one.
10:09Well, one day, buddy boy.
10:10One day.
10:11Maybe I should give her one.
10:12Maybe I should give her one.
10:18Well, one day, buddy boy.
10:20One day.
10:27So, where are we going next?
10:28I don't know.
10:29Check the list.
10:30I don't have the list.
10:32What do you mean you don't have the list?
10:34You had the list.
10:35Well, where did I put it?
10:36I don't know.
10:37Oh, I must have left it, but, er...
10:40Fuck.
10:45Do we need it?
10:46We're salesmen, aren't we?
10:47Yeah.
10:48Well, how the fuck are we going to be salesmen with no customers?
10:53So, should we go back and get it?
10:55Listen, I'm going to teach you the first rule of salesmanship, okay?
10:58No, fuck it.
10:59The first rule of being a man, never go back.
11:03So, what are we going to do?
11:04Just stop flapping your feet about.
11:06I'll work it out.
11:10Morning.
11:13Oh, no.
11:14She's the social worker from my house.
11:19Fuck it.
11:23Tell you what, bunny boy.
11:25Why don't you head next door?
11:26Grab yourself some sweets.
11:29Then have a little sit outside.
11:31Too nice to be cooped up indoors, eh?
11:33Thanks.
11:34Good boy.
11:39Right then.
11:41Okay.
11:42So, what happens now?
11:43I call the police.
11:44Police?
11:46What the fuck are you talking about?
11:48Mr Monroe, a Section 20 Child Protection Order had already been filed when you absconded.
11:51A what?
11:52We didn't.
11:53When you absconded.
11:54It's now been escalated to a missing person.
11:55And the police are looking for you.
11:57He's not missing, is he?
11:59He's right here with me.
12:01Stop.
12:02Listen.
12:03His mother has just died in the most tragic of circumstances.
12:07And I can't begin to explain the effect that has had on him.
12:10It's a fucking tragedy, if you must know.
12:11Right now, that boy needs his father.
12:19Don't do it.
12:20What are you doing?
12:21You know there's a pay phone down the road.
12:23I know, we'll be gone by the time you reach, yeah?
12:28The door won't open till it's finished, Benny.
12:30Fuck.
12:34Yeah.
12:36He's just a child, Mr Monroe.
12:37He's my boy.
12:40You're just...
12:42showing him the ropes.
12:43I'm sorry about your wife, Mr Monroe, but this is what's best for Bunny Jr.
12:48I do hope that one day you understand.
12:53What are you going to do?
13:01What are you going to do?
13:12Ready, boy?
13:13Come on.
13:14Not lively.
13:17Come on.
13:21Good boy.
13:23Good boy.
13:28I gave you a list.
13:29I know you did.
13:31I need a new list.
13:32Well, those were good leads.
13:33They'll give me some more good leads.
13:34I can't keep giving up good leads every time somebody loses a list.
13:38I didn't lose it.
13:39What happened to me then?
13:40What, Jesus Christ?
13:41Geoffrey, have you ever heard of an act of God?
13:44What's that mean?
13:45It means it wasn't my fault.
13:46So, Geoffrey, sweetheart, I'm going to get in the car,
13:48and I'm going to come to the office, and I'm going to get the list.
13:51No, no, no, no, no.
13:52I wouldn't do that, my friend.
13:53You know, I've had the police in here asking lots of questions about you.
13:56It's probably best if you lay low for a bit, bud.
13:58What?
13:59Why?
14:00That woman called them, the one with the missing money.
14:07And what did you tell them?
14:08I told them that I didn't know where you were.
14:10Did you tell them that I didn't take it?
14:12Did you tell them that I wouldn't do that?
14:15Geoffrey?
14:17Geoffrey!
14:18I told them that I didn't know where you were.
14:21For fuck's sake!
14:44Dad, are we going back to the office?
14:46No.
14:47But, don't we need another list?
14:48Yeah.
14:49So, how...
14:50Second rule of being a man.
14:51Make sure you've got at least one mate.
14:52I'll never let you down.
14:53It helps if you think the sun shines out of your arse.
14:56So, don't aim too high.
14:57Hello you dirty cuss.
14:58All right poodle, I'd do...
14:59I'd do...
15:00I know where we'll be.
15:01I can't get you to the phone right now, so it can give me a message after the beep,
15:11I'll call her back.
15:13Hello, you dirty cunt.
15:14All right, poodle, I'll get you.
15:15I'll bring a cunt to the phone right now,
15:17so if you leave a message after the beep,
15:18I'll follow back.
15:24I know where we'll be.
15:26We're going to the pub.
15:28The pub?
15:30Cool.
15:43You all right, bud?
15:58All right, babe.
15:59Poodle.
16:02Gaz, has Poodle been in yet?
16:04No, I've not seen it.
16:07Genia, come here, sit down.
16:09We'll have a quick one while we wait.
16:10OK.
16:11Large scotch and a coke, yeah?
16:14A coke.
16:15Make it quick, O'Bahn.
16:17You know your lad ain't supposed to be in here.
16:18Yeah, yeah, I know.
16:21No school tonight?
16:29Oi.
16:30What are you doing?
16:39It's so cold.
16:41I'm not going to go, you know.
16:45Dad.
16:47When are we going to go home?
16:51You want to be a top salesman?
16:53Yeah.
16:53Of course.
16:55Well, top salesmen have got to be like sharks.
16:57Roofless, efficient, killer sharks, OK?
17:00OK.
17:01I know what happens to a shark if it stops moving.
17:06What?
17:15He suffocates.
17:31Well, stop me! The boys!
17:59Crap!
18:00You're actually steaming me.
18:02Hi, Poodle.
18:03What are you doing in here, little man?
18:05Just having a quick one.
18:10You, my little friend, are just too much.
18:12What, you were too busy to come and have a drink with your old pal?
18:15Come on now, as if I'm ever too busy for my mate, Poodle.
18:22Good to see you.
18:24Gary, a couple of scotches and another Coke.
18:27Yeah, in a minute.
18:28Show your appreciation for...
18:30Not gonna lie, I've been pretty fucking busy working my list, mate.
18:33Oh, yeah? Pretty fucking busy or pretty busy fucking?
18:35Well, I do like to go above and beyond for my customers.
18:38Hell yeah, I know.
18:40What a fucking...
18:42What?
18:43You all right?
18:46What's that?
18:48A few drinks with the boys?
18:50What more could I ask for?
18:51Dad.
18:52I think I need a wee actually, Dad.
18:53Yeah, go on.
18:54Over there.
18:55So, Poop, mate.
18:56Been a bit of a hot streak, actually.
18:57You managed to go right through my list.
18:58So I was gonna ask if there was any chance I could...
19:01Hey.
19:02You sure you're all right, mate?
19:03Come on, man.
19:04Who?
19:05What are we doing?
19:06Noodle.
19:07I need a word, mate.
19:08Come on.
19:09Come on.
19:10Come on.
19:11Come on.
19:12Hey.
19:13Hey.
19:14You sure you're all right, mate?
19:16Come on, man.
19:17Come on, man.
19:21Who?
19:22What are we doing?
19:24Noodle.
19:25I need a word, mate.
19:36What the fuck's sake?
19:37Who?
19:42Who?
19:44Who?
19:45Who?
19:46Who?
19:47Who?
19:48But see you later.
19:49Come on, girl.
19:50Yeah!
19:52Who?
19:54Who?
19:56Who?
20:07Weird, isn't it?
20:12Yeah, you don't have to understand, you know, it's okay to be a little boy, I love spaceships,
20:24Beatles.
20:34Who, what?
20:36Oh, man.
20:50Hey, Google! Get out of the fucking way!
20:53Fuck off!
20:56Wow, fucking move it!
20:58Pig.
21:00Ha, ha, ha.
21:06All the way down.
21:08This.
21:09Run!
21:18Pull down the fucking way!
21:22Show it to me!
21:24It's alright, guys, he's had a few too many, mate.
21:26Back the fuck up for ya!
21:28Go on, go on, show me!
21:30Show me!
21:32Fuck this!
21:34Calm it down now!
21:36Fuck this!
21:37Fuck off!
21:38Hey, hey, hey!
21:39You want a pussy?
21:40Here you are!
21:41Come here, come here, come here, come here.
21:42Yeah, fuck you!
21:43What's the matter with you?
21:45Let's get you another drink.
21:53Sorry, is this your room?
21:57You're alright.
22:04You're here with your dad?
22:05Christ.
22:06You didn't fancy the formal fair, no?
22:07I'm not a little kid.
22:08Alright, mate.
22:09A salesman, on the road.
22:10We'll be going soon.
22:11Alright.
22:12Work you in mine, is it?
22:13Look what's the matter with you.
22:14I want you to find me.
22:15You're here with your dad?
22:16Christ.
22:17You didn't fancy the formal fair, no?
22:21I'm not a little kid.
22:22I'm not a little kid.
22:23Alright, mate.
22:24me a salesman on the road we'll be going soon all right work your man is it
22:41won't be wanting any of this then come on poo what's up with you hey she's gone what are you
23:00talking about mate who's gone i know my annie she's fucked off bond and it's like you're my mate aren't
23:09ever yeah of course it's like she took it with her all of a sudden it's gone i can't make a sale i can't
23:20fuck i can't it doesn't work anymore all right don't panic okay it's just one of those things
23:33happens to everyone it's happened to you well no but it's happened to people i know
23:45you mean me
23:49yeah
23:53no don't worry poor old bud will sort you out gary get us a couple more drinks would you
24:01you all right
24:20yeah i should go my dad's probably wondering where i am
24:27back to work right
24:33working man
24:37actually
24:40can i please have some
24:45take it
24:48thanks
24:49good luck
24:52you too
24:57everything's going to be all right thanks bonnie
25:00it's good to see you mate it's good to see you mate you too
25:12yeah yeah
25:14i didn't just come in to say hello though you know i was after a bit of a favor actually
25:30what favor
25:30the truth is i ran into a spot bother caught my pants down you know how it goes and i managed to
25:38lose my list
25:40i was gonna ask for a couple of names of yours but actually if you're not in a zone right now then
25:47maybe i should take the whole thing off your hands what do you reckon that's why you're here
25:52that's why you've come to see my fucking yeah i'm not being rude poo but do you really
26:00think i've got time to be sitting around listening to your sob stories
26:06it's your fault
26:08what is
26:11you fucked her after the wake
26:14who
26:15annie
26:17did i
26:18no please
26:19poodle what does it even fucking matter
26:29wait what are you what the
26:30get off
26:31get the
26:37you're a cunt mother
26:39a true proper total cunt
26:41i've been your best mate for years and i love you but you don't give a
26:45fuck about anybody but the body fucking monroe
26:49no one did you kill herself
27:01she had a condition you knew that everyone knew that she was ill
27:05nothing me or anyone could do about that it was my fault none of this is my fault
27:11if you want to hold on to a bird for two fucking minutes poop maybe try not being such a
27:17fucking loser lost it
27:19lost what lost here you never fucking had it
27:22you're a part-timer mate and also run and if your bird
27:26was so special why don't i even remember fucking her
27:29poodle
27:37poodle
27:39poodle
27:40poodle
27:47poodle
27:49dad
27:49poodle
27:51poodle
27:52i want you to say sorry to me
27:53poodle
27:54poodle
27:54say sorry
27:55poodle
27:56say sorry
27:57and then will you give me the fucking list
28:02oh my
28:02poodle
28:24poodle
28:24fucking hell it's all right mate it's all right i've called the police my wife's on the phone
28:37to an ambulance it's all right please yeah did you see the number plate help is on the way
28:42just stay as still as you can wait where the fuck are you going you can't just fuck off
28:49wait
28:50wait
28:54you're going to fucking leave
28:59you're going to fucking leave
28:59you're going to be
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31:01If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this programme,
31:05help is available online at sky.com forward slash viewer support.
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