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The Death of Bunny Munro Season 1 Episode 2
#RealityTVDeep
#RealityTVDeep
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🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Please be aware that this program also contains themes of suicide.
00:04BUN
00:26BUN
00:28BUN, LOOK AT ME
00:30Oh, he's awake, you see?
00:34Look at me.
00:38It feels different.
00:42Yeah.
00:43Yeah, like it's bigger than us now.
00:46It's close, like...
00:50BUN
00:52It feels divine.
00:57I love it.
01:00I love having a baby.
01:04I'm gonna...
01:06I fucking love you, Bunny.
01:16Yeah.
01:18I love you, Bunny.
01:22Dad...
01:24What are we gonna do now?
01:26We're gonna get out there and shake that money tree, is what we're gonna do.
01:44Come on, Junior!
01:46Oh, last thing.
01:48And don't stop me if you've heard this one before.
01:50All right, Bun.
01:51All right, Ray.
01:52What's green and smells of bacon?
01:54That's the end.
01:55Kermit's finger!
01:56You're okay, I'll see you later.
02:00How you doing, my friend?
02:01Tip fucking top.
02:02Always.
02:03So, er...
02:04So what are you doing here?
02:05What do you think?
02:06I'm ready to go, so I need the list.
02:07Listen, Bun.
02:08When I lost my Hilda, it took a while.
02:10I'm fine.
02:11Why don't you just take some time?
02:12There is no time.
02:13I need to get out there, get warmed up.
02:14What for?
02:15One week.
02:16Until the big one.
02:17What, the Expo?
02:18There'll be others, Bun.
02:19Nah.
02:20No.
02:21No.
02:22No.
02:23No.
02:24No.
02:25No.
02:26No.
02:27No.
02:28No.
02:29No.
02:30No.
02:31No.
02:32No.
02:33No.
02:34No.
02:35No.
02:36No.
02:37No.
02:38No.
02:39No.
02:40No.
02:41No.
02:42No.
02:43No.
02:44No.
02:45No.
02:46No.
02:47No.
02:48No.
02:49No.
02:50No.
02:51No.
02:52No.
02:53It's an annual event, Bun.
02:54It happens every year.
02:55Oh.
02:56Oh.
02:57Oh.
02:58Oh Christ, what happened last night?
03:00You brought shame to the house of eternity enterprises.
03:02Yeah, I also pissed myself.
03:03You know what?
03:04Alright, Beardall?
03:05We're going down to Bedford for a little drinky poos.
03:06I'll come.
03:07We've got to hit the road.
03:08What?
03:09What, no school today?
03:11You're shaking the money tree. Getting ready for the big one.
03:14Right, Dad?
03:15Right.
03:16Now, Geoffrey, if you'd be so very kind, give me the fucking list.
03:20OK, Bunny. You're the boss.
03:22No, Geoffrey, you're the boss.
03:24I just happen to be the only guy in this two-bit operation
03:27who has the faintest fucking idea how to sell anything.
03:33He's not wrong.
03:36Oh, baby.
03:40It's a commitment.
03:43It's a commitment, baby.
03:51My wife don't like it.
04:00It's a commitment.
04:05We gotta love one another or die, brother.
04:10We gotta love one another or die, oh, baby.
04:18Cause it's super glue.
04:20It's super glue.
04:22It's super glue.
04:23It's super glue.
04:24It's super glue.
04:28Knock him down.
04:29My gift to you.
04:50She lives in New Haven.
04:51Ouch.
04:53You will find her the most accommodating customer.
04:59You think I've lost it, Poodle?
05:02No. Of course not. Of course not, mate.
05:05I just thought it might help with the grieving process.
05:07If I ever need your freebies, Poodle, I'll ask for them,
05:10at which point you can shoot me in the head.
05:18Love you.
05:20Love you, too.
05:22Now, fuck off.
05:29What now?
05:33We're going to relieve some boobs of their cabbage.
05:36What?
05:38We're going to sell some stuff.
05:41That?
05:42What does shaking the money tree actually mean?
05:48It's like this.
06:02If you walk up to an oak tree,
06:05one of those big solid bastards with roots that grow deep in the soil,
06:10you walk up to a tree like that and give it a shake, what happens?
06:13I don't know.
06:15Well, nothing bloody happens, does it?
06:18You could stand there shaking it all day long.
06:20All that's going to happen is your arms will get tired, right?
06:23Right?
06:26Yeah.
06:27Of course.
06:29But if you walk up to a skinny, dry, fucked up little tree
06:32with a withered trunk and a few leaves clinging on for dear life
06:35and you put your hands round it and shake the shit out of it,
06:38as we say in the trade,
06:39then those bloody leaves are going to come flying off, right?
06:42So, the oak tree's the rich bastard
06:44and the skinny tree's the poor soul who hasn't got any money.
06:46Are you with me?
06:47Now, that all sounds easier than it is, bunny boy.
06:50Do you want to know why?
06:52Mm-hm.
06:53Okay, Dad.
06:54Because every fucking bastard and his dog
06:56has got hold of the little tree and is shaking it for all it's worth.
06:58The government, the bloody landlord,
07:00the lottery they don't have a chance in hell of winning,
07:02all the useless shit they see on TV,
07:05the fruit machines, the bookies,
07:06every bastard and his three-legged, one-eyed, top-swidden dog
07:09is shaking this little tree for all it's worth.
07:12So...
07:13You've got to set yourself apart.
07:17You've got to have something they think they need,
07:21above all else.
07:22What's that?
07:24Hope.
07:26The dream.
07:28You've got to sell them the dream.
07:31What's the dream?
07:35Me.
07:36Right.
07:37Not you.
07:38You're the navigator.
07:39You're in charge of the map.
07:40Making sure we're headed in the right direction.
07:41Very important job.
07:42You up for it?
07:43Yeah.
07:44So what do I do now?
07:45You wait in the car.
07:46Okay.
07:47All right, boys.
07:48Do you know it's black number nine, boys?
07:49Are you looking at me for it?
07:50Now, let's see what we have here.
07:51Amanda, I've got you down for the Moroccan Rose bath oil.
07:53Renutrative lifting cream.
07:54Plus, you wanted the dermo expertise.
07:55Eye solace.
07:56Mm-hmm.
07:57And bottle of scotch and a good night's sleep.
07:58Oh, yeah.
07:59Right.
08:00We're my kids.
08:01You know what I mean?
08:02So what do I do now?
08:03You wait in the car.
08:04Okay.
08:05Hello, boys.
08:06And we're not going to sleep.
08:08You know it's black number nine, boys.
08:09Are you looking at me for it?
08:10Now, let's see what we have here.
08:12Amanda, I've got you down for the Moroccan Rose bath oil.
08:16Renutrative lifting cream.
08:17Plus, you wanted the dermo expertise.
08:19Eye solace.
08:20Mm-hmm.
08:21And, bottle of scotch and a good night's sleep.
08:24Yeah, right.
08:25We're my kids.
08:26You know what I mean.
08:27I'm sorry. I'm very disappointed in you.
08:30I'm sorry, he's disappointed.
08:32You've ordered the geranium and orange bath oil and the eye solace,
08:36but, and it pains me to say this,
08:38you've not ordered the lifting cream.
08:42Oh, you absolute fiend.
08:44Am I in trouble, Mr. Munro?
08:46100% plant oil, natural fragrance, liquid heaven.
08:51Barry White's in a bottle.
08:52It's a big bottle, isn't it?
08:56Oh, no, no.
08:57You know what baffles me is why a woman as fine as yourself
09:00fears it's justifiable to deny her body the very thing it aches for.
09:06I'm very, very disappointed in you.
09:11Buy the bloody cream.
09:12All right. I'll take it.
09:14Marvellous. Now, Georgia,
09:19I've got you down for the bath oil, the hair mask,
09:22the pro-collegiate night cream, and...
09:25anything else?
09:32Anything.
09:33Um...
09:34I know.
09:37I fucking get seen to.
09:39Now!
09:40Ladies, what I am shocked and, quite frankly, appalled.
09:46I'm a bona fide professional.
09:47Oh, yeah.
09:47But then again, they do say that a satisfied customer
09:50is a loyal customer, so we can't leave you...
09:53unsatisfied.
09:57Can we?
09:58I don't know.
10:08Go and watch telly.
10:09Go.
10:11Out.
10:12You go.
10:13Go on.
10:15Come on.
10:18Yours?
10:20Uh, yeah.
10:22Precious.
10:23Um, do you have any kids, Mr Munro, or?
10:32Yeah, I do. A boy.
10:35How old is he?
10:37Seven. Ten, maybe.
10:48I'm afraid, ladies, that time has crept up on me.
10:52Oh, come on, it's still working.
11:22Oh, come on, look.
11:25Hoppa.
11:28Ah, come on.
11:30We don't see these girls.
12:04It's time to get the hell out of this town.
12:08It's turned.
12:11It's gone sour.
12:13Me too.
12:17Yeah, why the fuck not?
12:20Okay.
12:22Great.
12:24Where are we gonna go?
12:26Where do you wanna go?
12:29Mummy always said she liked to live in the countryside one day.
12:32On a farm.
12:35I think I'd like that too.
12:37Okie dokie. Farm it is.
12:39Yeah. Cool. Can we have animals?
12:42Be a pretty crap farm with no animals, wouldn't it?
12:45Yeah. Pretty crap, alright.
12:48Can we have chickens?
12:50Course we can.
12:51And cows?
12:53Lots of them.
12:54Herds?
12:55Them too. And a great big horny bull.
12:59And an alligator.
13:01But...
13:02Fuck it. Two big bastard alligators.
13:05But we don't get alligators on a farm.
13:08Well, you do on our farm, mate.
13:11Eh?
13:14Okay.
13:15Right, come on then, navigator.
13:16Oh yeah, good lad. Good lad.
13:17All right, mate?
13:18He's only having a go, you kidder.
13:19Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it.
13:20Good, good, good.
13:21Hold it, hold it, hold it.
13:22Good, good, good.
13:23Good lad.
13:24Good lad.
13:25Good lad.
13:26Good lad.
13:27All right, mate?
13:28He's only having a go, you kidder.
13:30Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it.
13:31Good, good, good.
13:32Good lad.
13:33Good lad.
13:34Good lad.
13:35Good lad.
13:36All right, mate?
13:37He's only having a go, you kidder.
13:39Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it.
13:40Good, good, good.
13:41Good lad.
13:42Good lad.
13:43Good lad.
13:44Good lad.
13:45Good lad.
13:46Good lad.
13:47Good lad.
13:48Right.
13:49Come on then, navigator.
13:50Your chance is shy.
13:52Where are we going?
13:57Erm.
13:58Charlotte, Parnavar, Shoreham.
14:00Have you been there before?
14:02Nope.
14:03But I know we're gonna have some fun.
14:06Are we?
14:10Yeah.
14:14Shoreham's.
14:15Shoreham, it's right there.
14:19Ow.
14:22What is wrong with you?
14:23I told you.
14:24It's my eyes.
14:28I need cream.
14:30Mummy used to get it from chemists, but...
14:40All right?
14:42Here's what we'll do.
14:43I'll drop you at a chemist, and while I go and take care of the lovely Charlotte Parnavar, you can get your cream, all right?
14:50On my own?
14:51Yeah.
14:52I'll be quick.
14:54Yeah?
14:55Oh yeah.
14:56Suburban girls.
14:58They're all the same.
15:00Trapped in their immaculate little identikit houses.
15:03They contact the office asking for a free demonstration of this cream, that barm.
15:07Whatever.
15:08Not what they really want, not what they're secretly praying for.
15:11What's that?
15:12A real man to smash through their doors and tear their fucking lights apart for half an hour.
15:18And that's you, right, Dad?
15:19That's absolutely right, Bunny, my boy.
15:21There's a chemist down on the high street.
15:34You go and get your cream.
15:36Okay.
15:41Listen, I won't be long, so you go and get your cream, then come back and wait for me here on those steps.
15:46Good.
15:57Don't talk to strangers!
16:16I'll be fine.
16:17Thank you!
16:19I'll be fine.
16:20I'll be fine.
16:21I'll be fine.
16:22I'll be fine.
16:23I'll be fine.
16:33Prida Kahlo.
16:35Beautiful.
16:36Isn't she?
16:41You okay?
16:42OK?
16:45Yeah.
16:46Just not quite feeling myself today.
16:49Anyway, let's get back to business, shall we?
16:52This replenishing cream is just heaven for the tootsies, miss.
16:55May I call you Charlotte?
16:57Sure.
16:58Or you can call me Bunny.
17:02Bunny?
17:09You are joking, right?
17:12Oh, I'm deadly serious.
17:15And you know what they say about bunnies.
17:18What do they say?
17:19Well, you know, that they...
17:23I don't know what they say.
17:34Does this routine actually work on the ladies, Bunny?
17:38Yeah.
17:39Did you just wink at me?
17:44Maybe.
17:46Oh, you are beyond belief.
17:47So they tell me.
17:48Now, this rub will make you feel...
17:51Where did you crawl from, Bunny?
17:52The tar pits.
17:53Like the princess you've always deserved to be.
17:56You're a dodo.
17:58You should have a sign hanging around your neck saying extinct.
18:00Hey.
18:01I don't know what you think is going on here, but...
18:06I'm just trying to do my job.
18:07OK?
18:08Trying to make a living.
18:09Trying to provide for my son.
18:10Your son?
18:12You've got a son?
18:13Yeah.
18:14Where is he?
18:16He...
18:18He's waiting for me.
18:21Lucky boy.
18:22I'm sorry, Mr. Munro.
18:33I've gone too far.
18:37I think I've wounded you.
18:38No.
18:40You haven't.
18:42It's alright.
18:44I just need to use your bathroom.
18:46What?
18:47Yeah.
18:49Been on the road all day.
18:51Need to go so much I can taste it.
18:55Oh, you're a class act.
18:57It's down the hall.
19:13Oh.
19:15Fuck you.
19:23Yeah, whatever.
19:28Stupid.
19:29Come out, come out.
19:30Yeah, you carve it.
19:32Oh.
19:35And all your fucking magazines.
19:42Go on.
19:43Oh, what a piss.
19:53There's a coupé.
19:57Naughty, naughty.
20:06Can I help?
20:09Yes, please.
20:10I need some eye cream.
20:13Cora, um, Cora...
20:16Cora and Penacol?
20:17Yes.
20:26That's £3.98, then, please.
20:37Nice staying here for a little bit.
20:40OK.
20:43You OK?
20:51I think so.
20:53My mum usually does it.
20:55Right, and where's your mum?
21:00She's dead.
21:04I'm sorry.
21:06It's OK.
21:08She must have wanted to die.
21:10That's why it's not so sad.
21:16So...
21:16Who's looking after you?
21:19My dad.
21:21We're on the road.
21:23Shaking the money tree.
21:25That means selling.
21:26And where is he now, your dad?
21:32I don't know.
21:33I don't know.
21:33I don't know.
21:53I don't know.
21:54How are you?
21:56Bingo.
22:08Right, do you want to buy any of this shit or not?
22:29I detect a note of hostility.
22:32Yeah, well, us dodos get like that sometimes.
22:35What are you going to do about it?
22:36I'm going to ask you to get the fuck out of my house.
22:39I'm leaving.
22:39But just so you know, I just pissed all over your bathroom.
22:44What?
22:45All over the walls, the carpet, your woman's magazine.
22:48You what?
22:49Your fucking toothbrush.
22:50What?
22:53You just...
22:54And you can take this and shut the fuck your ass.
23:06Fuck!
23:07Fuck!
23:08I'm not bad.
23:09Like six little milk tees.
23:12Won't go bad.
23:15Won't move on by.
23:16Won't get on.
23:19Won't move on by.
23:22Won't move on by.
23:23Fight my little flames.
23:26Oh, my God.
23:27Fuck you.
23:28Fight my little flames.
24:00I'll smash you.
24:30I almost forgot your face.
24:46Sweetheart, I think you ought to go to your nuns.
24:51Yeah.
24:54She doesn't want me.
24:56She doesn't want to help your dad.
24:57If you asked her.
25:02But me and dad are going to get a farm.
25:05Oh, yeah.
25:07With the crocodiles.
25:14I just think maybe your dad's not brilliant at looking after anyone who isn't your dad.
25:25Guess he's not much good at that either.
25:27Well, he didn't hang himself in the curtains, did he?
25:37You all right?
25:55Question.
25:57Who's the coolest fucking dad in the world?
25:59Whoa.
26:14It's amazing.
26:16Wait till we get up to the room, buddy boy.
26:18You're going to love it.
26:18I'm going to show you the weirdest thing in the world.
26:22What?
26:22I'm talking completely wacko jacko.
26:25What?
26:25No, I mean seriously, like off the planet, Janet.
26:28What?
26:28The tiniest fucking soaps you've ever seen in your entire life.
26:32Can I help you?
26:37Certainly you can.
26:40Nicest room you've got.
26:42Where did you get that?
26:43Where did I get?
26:45Buddy boy, you are aware you're talking to the primo, creme de la creme, number one salesman in the hole of Brighton, right?
26:52Yeah.
26:53Of course.
26:53I could sell a bicycle to a barracuda.
26:56Our Elizabeth room, sir.
26:58Elizabeth?
27:02I could sell two bicycles to a barracuda.
27:05I'm telling you.
27:06Mate, I could sell the whole bloody bike shed.
27:13Come on, you bald prick.
27:15Give me some good news.
27:16We've had a complaint.
27:18A woman called and said she had some money missing.
27:20Now, obviously, I told her that we at Eternity Enterprises are not in a habit of employing thieves.
27:27But she's threatening to ring the police, bud.
27:30And also, your dad's carer call.
27:34You're right about the soaps, Dad.
27:36They're so tiny.
27:38They're so tiny.
27:50Can you teach me how to be a salesman like you?
28:02I'm not a very good navigator.
28:05And I don't like being left on my own.
28:15Yeah?
28:15Yeah.
28:19Okay.
28:20Really?
28:22Teach her everything I know.
28:27What are you doing?
28:29Checking the monetary.
28:31Giving the flipping money!
28:32Uh, Guam.
28:47Into bed.
29:03Uh, Guam.
29:03Into bed.
29:05Oh, Guam.
29:08Oh, Guam.
29:09Uh.
29:10Do you, too?
29:13Yeah.
29:13Oh, my God.
29:23No.
29:27Uf.
29:28Oh, my God.
29:29Look at me, bunny.
29:56Look at me.
29:59That's all you had to do, bunny.
30:21Stop looking everywhere else.
30:26We had it all.
30:31I want to do.
30:33So why didn't you take it, you dope?
30:38I don't know.
30:43Yes, you do.
30:47Yes, you do.
30:54I don't know.
30:55I don't know.
30:56I don't know.
30:57I don't know.
30:59All right.
31:00What are you doing?
31:01Yeah, I know.
31:02All right.
31:04You have to laugh, man.
31:05Fine.
31:06Bye.
31:07All right.
31:08Bye.
31:09Bye.
31:10Look at me.
31:11All right.
31:12So, let's go.
32:12We're right back.
33:42He said you were a most accommodating customer.
33:48Oh, did he now?
33:51Most obliging, he said.
33:54Generous even.
33:55Tell me more about the cream.
33:58Well, Pamela, this rich, hydrating, age-targeting lotion.
34:18Are you all right?
34:29Are you all right?
34:29It's been a hard day.
34:37Do you like pussy, Barney?
34:45I love it.
34:47How much do you love it?
34:51I love it beyond all things.
34:54I love it more than life itself.
34:57Do you love my pussy?
35:01Yeah.
35:04I do.
35:07I love it beyond all reason.
35:08I love it beyond all things.
35:10I love it beyond all things.
35:12I love it beyond all things.
35:13Come and get it.
35:24What's your name?
35:26Penny charade.
35:28What's yours?
35:29Bunny.
35:31Bunny?
35:33Bunny when do I?
35:37I've got a feeling about you.
35:39I think things are gonna get a whole lot worse.
35:44I know.
36:09Mommy who loves candy.
36:10Uncle says it.
36:11Honey says it.
36:12Everyone is a part.
36:14I'm on fire!
36:15I'm on fire!
36:16Yeah babe, I'm on fire!
36:20Well the horse says it nicks, there's a church in his wick, says the fox and the rabid and the nun in her heaven, I'm on fire!
36:30Yeah, babe, I'm on fire
36:35Well, my meek Bill Gates says
36:39And the prison in the United States says
36:41And the slacker and the worker and the girl in a burger
36:45I'm on fire
36:46Yeah, babe, I'm on fire
36:50Yeah, the general with his tank says
36:55And the man at the bank says
36:57And the soldier with his ruckus
36:58And the mouse in my pocket
37:00I'm on fire
37:01Yeah, babe, I'm on fire
37:06Well, the drug had a wreck
37:10With a needle in his neck says
37:12And drunk says
37:14And punk says
37:14And brave for this monk
37:16I'm on fire
37:18Well, babe, I'm on fire
37:22All right now
37:25If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this programme
37:32Help is available online at sky.com forward slash viewer support
37:37Thank you for listening to this probable movie
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