- 6 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:30Hello?
00:45Hey, who's groaning?
00:47What, do you guys got tummy aches or something?
00:55Mad Hatter?
00:56But Batman got rid of all the villains in Gotham.
00:58It was only a matter of time before he returned,
01:01and I didn't return alone.
01:07That's what we call a cue, Sad Hatter.
01:13Dad, just call me Stoa.
01:15This is so humiliating.
01:16No, humiliating is telling your friends
01:18that my kids moved back home
01:20because her poetry degree
01:21didn't yield the career opportunities she'd hoped for.
01:25Pottery.
01:26I majored in pottery.
01:27Poetry, pottery, potato, potattery.
01:30Put him under your throal.
01:34Okay, how do I...
01:35No, no, no, not that button.
01:36That one, small one.
01:37Stop it.
01:37I'm trying.
01:38Forget it.
01:39I'll just do it.
01:44All right, let's get what we came for.
01:46And what might that be?
01:50Oh, no, we're busted.
01:51Let's get out of here.
01:52Got!
01:53Get the bat!
02:01Get him, Sad Hatter!
02:02I won't ask again.
02:04What are you here for?
02:05Dad, just tell him we're looking for the...
02:07Allow me to shed some light
02:10on what they're looking for.
02:12Is this a friend of yours, Hatter?
02:14We're not friends.
02:15We're just looking for the same thing.
02:17This tea party is getting a little crowded.
02:21Till next time, Bats.
02:29Sorry, Bats.
02:30Crime is back in Gotham.
02:32Not if I can help it, Joker.
02:34Ooh, I'm so scared.
02:37Adult diapers don't fail me now.
02:38Ready the bat trap, Robin.
02:40Copy that, Master Batman.
02:42Hey, Joker can't fly.
02:49No fair.
02:51Your Batman game isn't fair.
02:53I didn't get to kill Robin.
02:55Next time, I get to kill Robin.
02:58Now, it's on to my chores.
03:01Your father asked me to run a diagnostic on the ExoBat.
03:04Can I help?
03:05Perhaps.
03:06First, Robin must prepare lunch
03:08just as soon as I get out of these tights.
03:11How does grilled cheese sound, then?
03:19Good morning, Uncle Alfred.
03:22Someone's in an especially chipper mood.
03:25I decided to give myself the day off.
03:27Wonderful.
03:28You're just in time for lunch.
03:30Ooh, what are you making?
03:32Grilled cheese for Master Damien,
03:34beef wellington for Bruce,
03:36salsa crab cakes for Claire,
03:38and for Ra's quail l'orange.
03:41Hmm, looks great, Alfred.
03:44Grilled awesomeness, Robin.
03:45Raw eggs at room temperature?
03:46My favorite.
03:47I demanded this quail be alive.
03:50No fair.
03:51Quail can't phase through ceilings.
03:53No fair.
03:55You make all this for lunch?
03:57Every day?
03:58Nothing brings more pleasure.
04:00Come on, Alicia.
04:01Don't you remember how much Alfred loved fawning over us?
04:04Yeah, we were five.
04:05You're an adult, BW,
04:07and he still waits on you hand and foot.
04:09I mean, not hand and foot.
04:11Beg your pardon, sir.
04:12It looks like you could use a hand and a foot.
04:14Oh, thanks, Alfred.
04:15Uh, I'd like to point out that I only recently started taking advantage of Alfred.
04:20Alfred, can I get more red sauce?
04:21No one takes advantage of Alfred, Alicia.
04:24May I have a glass of milk, please?
04:25Well, off to turn over the beds.
04:28I'm trying a new detergent.
04:29I won't spoil the scent, but it rhymes with Mavender.
04:33Don't you ever want to scream,
04:35I've had enough!
04:36You must want to do something for yourself.
04:38Well, let me think.
04:40I've spent almost every day of my life with Alfred.
04:42If there was anything funny wanted to do, I'd know.
04:45I suppose I'd fancy a family picnic.
04:48Wait, BW.
04:49Are you saying I don't know my own uncle?
04:51What?
04:52Come on.
04:52No, Alicia, that's not what I meant.
04:53Uh, perhaps what he meant.
04:54I mean, if we're being totally honest, you haven't been around as much.
04:58What is that supposed to mean?
05:00Things in here are getting a bit awkward.
05:02Do you want to go in the other room and watch TV?
05:06Oh, robot boys.
05:07Yes, Claire, let's talk like robots in the other room.
05:12If anyone needs me, I'll be sitting here watching this argument.
05:16Tell you what, let's make today Alfred fun day.
05:19We could take him snorkeling, or mechanical bull riding, or skydiving.
05:22Or, because he's 90, maybe like shuffleboard, bingo, or gardening.
05:27I don't know if I'm worth that trouble.
05:29As I said, a simple picnic would suffice.
05:32Of course you're worth it, Alfred.
05:34Come on, Unc.
05:34Let's have some fun.
05:36Yeah, some nice, safe fun.
05:37Thank you, that's a good job.
05:41Reep, reep, reep, beep, boop, beep, boop.
05:45Playing robot alone got boring.
05:52A break-in at a Wayne Enterprises warehouse.
05:55Wait, turn it back, please, turn it back, please!
05:57Does this sign mean nothing?
05:58Turn it back, turn it back, turn it back, turn it back, turn it back, turn it back, turn it back, turn it back, turn it back, turn it back!
06:01Okay, Mad Hatter has returned to Gotham, along with an accomplice, who we are learning goes by the name, Sad Hatter.
06:08Batman was reportedly on the scene, as was this mysterious bright figure.
06:12What were the Hatters after?
06:13Is this bright friend or foe?
06:15And most pressing, is crime returning to Gotham?
06:22Selina, which one of these screams fun?
06:27You're right, it's obvious.
06:31Uh-oh, someone saw the news.
06:33Is the Mad Hatter really back? What does he want?
06:35What's the deal with bright? Why do you have three of the same shirts?
06:37And how could you go on patrol without me?
06:39Yes, not sure yet, also not sure yet, not sure, and you know the rule, no patrol on school nights.
06:45School nights, I know.
06:46When Mad Hatter brought his kid out?
06:48Damien, I know we made a little Batman official last Christmas,
06:51but you still have a list of when you're allowed and not allowed to be Batman.
06:56You can't be Batman any of these times.
06:59Only. When. I. Say.
07:03Fine.
07:04So, can we go after Mad Hatter now?
07:06Mad Hatter is unpredictable and dangerous.
07:09You'll just have to be patient.
07:10Patience, sure. I've been practicing.
07:13See?
07:13Now can we go?
07:15Please!
07:16We'll bat chat about the Hatters later.
07:18Uncle Alfred, you have a wetsuit, right?
07:20And shark propeller?
07:21I'm worried about a bigger threat.
07:23Alicia, no shark anything!
07:25Bat-lift, stay away from the ocean!
07:28Hmm.
07:30When I say...
07:32When I say...
07:35You know, Selina, if you think about it, it's not really clear who I is here.
07:40I mean, I could be anyone.
07:43It almost depends who's reading this.
07:44It's like if I rated little Batman can go after the Hatters when I say, then I is me.
07:48And if that's the case, then I say I could go after him, right?
07:52Mwah!
07:53Yeah, okay, it's thin, but I'm rolling with it.
07:55To the Batcave!
07:59Damien!
08:00Are you in here?
08:01Whoa!
08:02It's just the ExoBat.
08:04Alfred's running diagnostics on it.
08:05Huh.
08:06Cool.
08:07So, I got your text.
08:09What's the emergency?
08:10Not an e-emergency.
08:12A bat-mergency.
08:14Yeah.
08:15I've been meaning to talk to you guys about the whole bat in front of everything.
08:18It's kind of played out.
08:19That's your bat opinion.
08:21Listen, Matt and Sad Hatter are on the loose.
08:23Not a bat interested.
08:25Come on, I need an ex-criminal mind to help me figure out what they'll strike next.
08:28Matt Hatter is a deadly supervillain.
08:31And you are just a kid.
08:33I'm no kid.
08:34I'm vengeance.
08:35Ugh.
08:36Think hard about my warning.
08:37Vengeance doesn't think.
08:39This is pointless.
08:40You're just gonna do what you want.
08:41Vengeance always does what it wants.
08:44Well, we could always ask Pat-Pap for help.
08:47No, you're right.
08:49We need information, not merciless bloodshed.
08:52What other villains do we know?
08:59Look what we have bat here.
09:04No shark wrestling.
09:05Shark wrestling is rejuvenating.
09:07What part of your uncle is 90 years old isn't clicking for you?
09:11I live to him in the 80 plus division.
09:13My activities will be more fun.
09:15I see.
09:15This rain wouldn't have fun if it came up to him in clowns.
09:17Well, look, trust me, Alicia.
09:19Clowns are no fun.
09:20Please.
09:21That's not quarrel.
09:22Why, this afternoon with just the two of you is all the fun I could ever imagine.
09:26Except, of course, for the family picnic.
09:28He's right, Alicia.
09:29We shouldn't argue.
09:30Yeah, today's about Alfred having fun.
09:32It's not like it's a contest or anything.
09:34Yeah, but if Alfred should mention that he enjoys my activity over yours...
09:38Or mine over yours...
09:40We'd have to listen and take it to heart.
09:42Or else we'd be ignoring Alfred.
09:45Hard to imagine, really.
09:46Hard to imagine, really.
10:16We bought bath bombs, scented candles, and a cornucopia of chocolates for the A-Braw.
10:22I'm so proud of us for not stealing anything.
10:25Ow!
10:25My cankles!
10:27It's the Batboy from my nightmares!
10:29I need information.
10:30What would Mad Hatter want from Wayne Enterprises?
10:33We already told you we're regular people now!
10:35No!
10:36Wait!
10:36The Mad Hatter can be quite persistent.
10:38No doubt he's still looking for it.
10:41You mean continue targeting Wayne Enterprises' facilities?
10:43But there are dozens in Gotham!
10:45Uh, maybe the next closest one?
10:48Of course!
10:49It's so obvious!
10:50Kinda?
10:51I mean, I'm surprised you didn't...
10:52Oh.
10:54He's gone.
10:56He's not coming back for us, is he?
11:00Really, Alicia?
11:01Axe throwing?
11:02What were you thinking?
11:03What's important is Alfred liked it.
11:06Fine.
11:07Let's just ask Alfred what was more fun.
11:09Great idea.
11:10Be my guest.
11:11Uh, Bruce?
11:14Oh!
11:15You must have left him at...
11:16What's wrong, old man?
11:26Looking for the bingo hall?
11:27Ha!
11:30Give up, Fireball!
11:31There's no way you could beat me!
11:33What?
11:34How'd you beat me?
11:35Claire!
11:35I think I figured out where the Hatters are gonna strike next!
11:38Now I just need to know when!
11:39Ugh.
11:40Don't you ever take a break.
11:42Oh, Bruce just never takes breaks.
11:46Breaks!
11:46That's it!
11:47Last night's robbery took place during the guard shift break.
11:50The Hatters must have access to the guard schedules.
11:53You know what this means?
11:55It means your father has shown weakness again by granting these so-called guards breaks.
12:00Sure, Pop-Pop.
12:01But it also means the Hatters will probably try again tonight.
12:05Which would be...
12:06In less than an hour!
12:07I cracked the case!
12:09Damien bringing it in!
12:11Woo-hoo!
12:12Hmm.
12:12You figured it out.
12:13Does this mean you want to help?
12:15Nope.
12:15Deal me in, Pop-Pop.
12:18Thank you, Gutter Slug.
12:19I shall send you that quiche Lorraine recipe ASAP.
12:23And don't forget, Bingo is on Tuesday nights at the Bloody Barrel!
12:29Who knew fun could be so...
12:32exhausting.
12:36Suit up, Robin!
12:38The Hatters are on the move.
12:39It's up to the dynamic duo to put an end to their reign of terror.
12:43Oh.
12:44I don't...
12:45Perhaps we should alert your father.
12:48I tried calling him, but he didn't pick up.
12:51I don't know where he is.
12:53Okay, we're looking for a sweet old man with brittle joints who will do anything for you.
12:57Now, where is he?
12:58Don't mind him.
12:59He's wearing his not-fun shirt today.
13:01I'd love to join you, but you see, the boy wonder can hardly move these old bones.
13:08Then don't move them.
13:10The exobat can do all your bone moving for you.
13:13Young man, are you suggesting I don the Batman's experimental, highly dangerous, weaponized armor without properly field-testing it first?
13:22Why on earth would I...
13:23Please?
13:24Please?
13:25Oh.
13:26Uh, well...
13:27Okay.
13:28Yeah!
13:29Look out, Gotham.
13:30Here comes...
13:31Exobat.
13:32These mech controls are quite complex.
13:42Don't worry.
13:43We'll take it slow.
13:45Alfred, are you here?
13:49Look, Alfred left a note.
13:51He and Damien are running an errand.
13:52He's fine.
13:53Okay, what gifts?
13:56You've been really overprotective all day.
13:58Well, you may not really know this about me, but I'm not great at... showing... emotion.
14:06You?
14:07No.
14:08You're right, though.
14:09Alfred does wait on me hand and foot.
14:12But I know he really likes it, and...
14:14And?
14:15And I like it, too.
14:17It's how we show each other...
14:19You know...
14:20I know.
14:21Well, I guess I got defensive and I...
14:24Overcorrected, which made things ugly.
14:26Yes.
14:27Yes, you did, Bruce.
14:29And so did I.
14:31Maybe I felt guilty.
14:32Like I had some catching up to do.
14:34Guess we both owe Alfred an apology.
14:37And a do-over fun day.
14:38If you guys need anything, I'll be here watching you resolve your problem.
14:42Oop.
14:42Looks like I got a little emergency at work.
14:48Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
14:50Sad Hatter, how's your search going?
14:53What?
14:54Ha.
14:54You know, Stella, I'm beginning to think you don't even take this job seriously at all.
14:58Take it seriously?
15:00Have you seen your heart?
15:03I was right.
15:03There they are.
15:04Well done, Master Batman.
15:07Time to make a cool Batman entrance.
15:09Uh, just a moment.
15:10Your father's been alerted and should be here momentarily.
15:13But that might be too late.
15:14Plus, we've got ExoBats Assault Mode.
15:16Damien, wait.
15:18Oh my.
15:19Whoa.
15:20Whoa.
15:20Don't worry, ExoBat.
15:21I got it.
15:22Ah!
15:24Not the entrance I had hoped for.
15:27Oh, I don't know.
15:28It worked for me.
15:34Ah!
15:34Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
15:36And I thought I'd done my share of dangling food traps for the day.
15:40Don't worry.
15:41I'll get us out of this!
15:42Ha ha ha ha ha!
15:43When do we get a break?
15:44I'm tired.
15:45Uh, Dad?
15:47Behold!
15:48These meditamantelopers shall learn the hard way to never cross the Hatters.
15:51Mad and sad!
15:52Oh!
15:59Now that's an entrance!
16:04We'll talk about this later.
16:06Now don't be so hard on the board.
16:08I'm talking to both of you.
16:10All right, Hatter, I'm getting tired of asking you this.
16:13What are you after?
16:14Well, if you're so tired, why not take a rest?
16:16Here, look into my hat.
16:19You don't think I'd fall for...
16:22Whoa.
16:23Whoa, that's Bright.
16:25What are you doing here, Bright?
16:27Easy, Batman.
16:29I'm not here for you.
16:30Just stay out of my way.
16:32Ah!
16:34Ah!
16:35Gotcha!
16:37Ah!
16:37Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
16:39Dad, no!
16:41So many heroes.
16:43Let's clean house.
16:45Let's clean house.
16:48Where did he go?
16:50Easy now, Bats.
16:52Before someone gets...
16:53Ah!
16:53Now, Batman, destroy your friends!
17:21Come on, Dad.
17:23What we came for isn't here, so let's just go.
17:26Let Daddy have his fun, dear.
17:29Must destroy.
17:35Dad, please stop!
17:37It's us!
17:39Must destroy Bat Friends.
17:42Sir, but please...
17:46Alfred!
17:48Wait, Dad, stop, please!
17:51Okay, big guy, let's go, round two.
18:00I'm sorry for getting you into this mess.
18:02It is not entirely your fault, child.
18:05It isn't?
18:06Well, most of it is.
18:08While nothing brings me more pleasure than bringing joy to those I love,
18:11This most exhausting day has shown me that I do have weaknesses.
18:16ExoBat has a weakness?
18:18What is it?
18:18Kryptonite?
18:19The color yellow?
18:20Saying your name backwards?
18:22Durf!
18:22Ah!
18:23Actually, son, it's my inability to tell those I love, no.
18:30Oh, I see.
18:32Well then, I guess little Batman has a weakness too.
18:35The inability to hear, no.
18:37I have been told I could be more patient.
18:40Guess we both got something to work on, huh?
18:44Too bad, we won't have the chance!
18:47Stay put, young man.
18:49What are you gonna do?
18:49What I should have done at the first mention of Alfred Funday.
18:54Must destroy Bat-friends.
18:57No!
19:02What?
19:04Wow.
19:08I love you very much.
19:12And you know I'll care for you and our family until my final days.
19:17Impossible!
19:17He's intensifying Batman's willpower!
19:20It's breaking my neuro-hypnotic hold on him!
19:24But no longer will I suffer holding my tongue.
19:28I shall speak when I need to.
19:30And you shall listen.
19:33Starting now!
19:34Come on, Dad!
19:35So, listen to me, son.
19:46That's enough.
19:51Stella!
19:52Help me!
19:53Use your hat!
19:54No!
19:55This isn't me.
19:57I'm gonna be a graphic designer!
19:58No!
19:59What?
20:15Dad!
20:15You broke Mad Hatter's hold!
20:16I... but... the Hatters are gone!
20:20And so is Bright, I'm afraid.
20:23And we still don't know who he was or what the Mad Hatter was after.
20:27We'll find out in due time, sir.
20:29Yeah, Dad. Be patient.
20:32Nice job tracking the Mad Hatter, but it doesn't make up for breaking the rules and going on patrol on a school night.
20:39Technically, if you read them closely, I didn't break the rules.
20:42Well, let me guess. You're going with the loose interpretation of I.
20:49How wonderful! A breakfast picnic with all of my favorite people and Roz.
20:56This was all Alicia's idea.
20:59And a delightful one.
21:02Sorry, Unc. And we promise to do a better job listening to what you want.
21:06And I'll do a better job of speaking up.
21:09Say, Alfred, old chum, pass me a muffin.
21:11What? No.
21:13No.
21:13No.
21:41No.
21:42No.
21:43No.
21:44No.
21:45No.
21:46No.
21:47No.
21:48No.
21:49No.
21:50No.
21:51No.
21:52No.
21:53No.
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