- 6 weeks ago
00:00 - Introduction
01:40 - Trell, Emily & Allie
07:44 - Adam, Eve & Bella
15:16 - Legend, Chena & Maya
23:07 - Sean, Tyler, Alysia & Taya
29:35 - Pandora, Nellie & Jae
37:13 - Revisiting Trell, Emily, Allie & Kiley
01:40 - Trell, Emily & Allie
07:44 - Adam, Eve & Bella
15:16 - Legend, Chena & Maya
23:07 - Sean, Tyler, Alysia & Taya
29:35 - Pandora, Nellie & Jae
37:13 - Revisiting Trell, Emily, Allie & Kiley
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00I have two wives, Nellie and Jay.
00:02Then I have my three children.
00:05They love having multiple parents.
00:07The experience of becoming a parent to our children.
00:10Oh, this is another level of difficulty.
00:15We catch a lot of hate.
00:16People that'll pop up and be like, oh, this is a sin.
00:20Oh, no, I hate it.
00:21Oh, take it down, delete it.
00:23Oh, you should be ashamed.
00:24Do you ever get jealous?
00:28I live with my husband and my boyfriend and my boyfriend's wife.
00:32And together we have four happy children.
00:34Alicia and I originally started swinging.
00:36It was just an exciting thing to try.
00:38Through that, we were lucky enough to meet our other partners, Sean and Taya.
00:41We're polyamorous now. We're in a closed quad.
00:43Tyler and I already had two previous children.
00:45I found out that I was pregnant with Barrett.
00:47Before Barrett was born, Taya found out she was pregnant.
00:50At first, I was a little bit hesitant to not know who the fathers of Barrett or Carver were.
00:57Have you ever personally wondered about it?
01:01We're the rebel.
01:03Our children have three parents.
01:05We're a married couple and we have a girlfriend.
01:07Since 2020, we have dated about 60 people.
01:10When it comes to our children, we didn't really sit down and have a specific conversation about
01:15mommy and daddy are polyamorous.
01:17Probably took about two and a half months before they were like, okay, wait a minute.
01:21This is somebody special.
01:23We're a polyquad with three children.
01:25Do you like having three moms rain?
01:27No.
01:28The negative feedback we get is people have like an expiration date on our relationship.
01:33My sister took a little bit of an issue.
01:35How do you feel about joining the relationship?
01:41We are a polyamorous triad.
01:44Me and Emily, we met in 2010.
01:47We've been together ever since.
01:49We've been married for five years.
01:50We had already, I guess you could say, had encounters with other women.
01:54But they weren't looking for a relationship at that time.
01:57But we realized that we didn't want to keep inviting different people into our life like that.
02:03So we ended up, I guess you could say, trying it out with someone.
02:07And we like that dynamic better.
02:09About two years ago, we met Ally.
02:11It was the 4th of July, I guess you could say, cookout.
02:14We started to like really hang out a lot after that.
02:17And then it kind of just gradually turned into something.
02:20It wasn't something planned.
02:21We kind of just all came together.
02:23Here we are now, over two years later.
02:26I biologically don't have any children.
02:29When I first met Trell, I knew that he already had Lele.
02:33We call her Lele.
02:34But Aaliyah is her name.
02:35We met about a year after she was born.
02:38And then now we have our new baby, Rain.
02:41Emily had, you know, her issues with it at first.
02:46It happened so abruptly.
02:48It was so fast.
02:49It was a shock.
02:50It was like, we're with Ally and it's like, here's Rain.
02:53Like, you know.
02:54Yeah, it was quick.
02:55It was like, very fast.
02:57We had some people like contacting her.
03:00Like, did they just get with you so you can have a baby for them?
03:04Or are you a surrogate?
03:05Yeah, they thought I was a surrogate.
03:07Yeah, and it was like, yo, like, no.
03:10That's one of the worst things you could say as far as to her because...
03:13Sorry.
03:14You know what I'm saying?
03:15It's like, she deals with, you know, issues in that area.
03:19So, we've all been working on that.
03:22I don't want them to add this part in.
03:24It's okay.
03:25It's real, you know.
03:26But, at the end of the day, it just was very...
03:28It's insulting.
03:29I even have to explain to friends, like, you know, when they're like, when are you going
03:33to have a kid?
03:34It's such a, like, common question because we've been together so long.
03:37But, it's like a jab, like, every time.
03:40Some people try to test our relationship and cause little triggers, but we're unbreakable,
03:46honestly.
03:47I eventually would like to have a child.
03:50So, eventually we'll get there.
03:52But, it's just something that, it has to be planned, you know?
03:56Mmm, yummy!
03:57Baby Rain is being raised by me and Emily.
04:00So, she has two mothers, which is pretty lucky of her.
04:03So, she already calls Emily mom.
04:06And, as well me.
04:07We'll definitely let her know that Ally is her biological mother as far as, you know,
04:12she gave birth to her.
04:13But, we're raising her together and nobody loves her any less.
04:17Can you talk to me about your baby sister?
04:20Oh, my God.
04:21I couldn't even believe that she was actually, like, there.
04:25She's just crazy now.
04:27Lily is very open about it.
04:29She's happy about it.
04:30She loves Ally.
04:31Ally loves her.
04:32I think it's because, in the beginning, we didn't, like, sit her down, like, okay, this
04:35is what's going to happen.
04:36It was more so.
04:37She kind of just figured it out.
04:38Yeah.
04:39It was more so, like, we were living our life.
04:40And, it was just like, this is Ally.
04:43She just thought that it was organic.
04:45How do you feel about all of us?
04:48I don't care.
04:50Yeah.
04:51You told me somebody asked you something about it.
04:53And, you said, uh.
04:54It was a kid when we went to that one pool party.
04:57It was 4th July.
04:58Oh, yeah.
04:59What happened?
05:00What happened?
05:01She's like, oh, is that your mom?
05:03I was like, yeah.
05:05She's like, well, is that your dad?
05:08I was like, yeah.
05:09And, he was like, why is your dad hugging her?
05:11I was like, because they're all dating.
05:15She was like, how?
05:16And, I was like, you asked your mom.
05:18I don't want to talk about this.
05:21Did you lose any friends when you became part of their relationship?
05:26I did.
05:27I lost a handful of friends when I came into the relationship.
05:32I didn't lose any friends at all.
05:34I guess that's the thing about being a guy.
05:37It's like, they always assume something is cool, but they don't even want to really know why you're the way you are.
05:43I just assume, like, oh, you a dude.
05:45You got multiple girls.
05:46You cool.
05:47Yeah.
05:48It's like, yeah, it's cool, but it's also a challenge.
05:51Some people just assume that we're just an open relationship.
05:56Yo.
05:57What up, bro?
05:58What up, bro?
05:59All right, man.
06:00I have friends that don't understand.
06:02It's not like they're against it.
06:04They just still don't quite understand the dynamic.
06:07Like, we're all together, not just there with me.
06:10What did you think the first time Terrell told you about being in a poly relationship?
06:14I was impressed.
06:15I was like, man, I don't know how you do it.
06:17One is enough.
06:18People don't understand what our lifestyle is.
06:20They just see two women and one man, they think it's just party, party.
06:23They turn up.
06:24Right.
06:25And that's part of it, but that's not the whole thing.
06:27Right, right.
06:28That's a small fraction of what it really is, man.
06:29Yeah.
06:30It's an actual relationship.
06:31It's work, man.
06:32A lot of it, too.
06:33If your friends and your spouses enjoy each other as far as, like, friendship, brotherhood,
06:39sisterhood, you can go far with that, man.
06:41You got your squad.
06:42You know what I'm saying?
06:43What's the best thing about the poly relationship?
06:46That we all get to be together.
06:49That's true.
06:51There's so many different personalities, you know, and then on top of that, we're three
06:55different ethnicities, so we get to share our cultures together.
06:58Oh, yeah.
06:59Food is the best.
07:00Food is crazy, right?
07:01Finance, too.
07:02I mean, three incomes.
07:03Oh, that, too.
07:04Three incomes.
07:05That doesn't hurt.
07:06You still have to go through, like, trials and tribulations.
07:09Putting your emotions in things can wear you out, so don't give up.
07:13In these dynamics, they do take longer to really find, it's easier to find one person,
07:19but it's harder to have two, so definitely patience is a big thing, for sure.
07:24We have a family to raise.
07:26We have bigger things to focus on.
07:28It's deeper than just us being together at this point.
07:30All right, y'all.
07:31Yeah.
07:32That's a good one.
07:33Yeah.
07:34Those are nice.
07:35All right, y'all.
07:36It is a wrap.
07:41Cut.
07:42Cut.
07:43Cut.
07:44We're a married couple, and we have a girlfriend.
07:46I have this guy.
07:47He thinks that his outline of ideal woman is impossible to find.
07:51I became an dating coach 18 years ago, as an accident.
07:55There are only five skills you need for a woman to find you more attractive.
07:58I actually got voted the number one dating coach in the world three years in a row.
08:02His detail list is so detailed.
08:03What are you telling him?
08:04Well, I'm telling him to revise his list a little bit, basically.
08:07We've been running the company together.
08:09We've helped over 350,000 people in the world get their ideal relationship.
08:14Once he applies this, he will never have a problem with dating ever again.
08:21How have you personally applied your knowledge as dating coaches to your own dating lives?
08:26I know this stuff inside and out, and it is impossible to be in a relationship and not apply it.
08:31In our relationship, we have our dynamic, my dynamic with our partner, Eve's dynamic with our partner,
08:38and then our dynamic all together.
08:40So it's a lot more communication.
08:42So you just have to welcome a lot of very uncomfortable discussions that lead to wonderful results.
08:47Oh, let's go.
08:48Oh my god.
08:50Nice.
08:51We've been together for 10 years, almost 11 years.
08:54When we first met at Austin Fashion Week, I was in a relationship with another woman,
08:59and she actually saw Eve first and said, oh my gosh, I have to date that woman.
09:04And so I went up and said hi.
09:06I didn't really specifically was seeking Fukulayama's relationship per se.
09:10I was going with the flow.
09:11But over time, it developed into a real relationship.
09:14And the three of us ended up living together.
09:16For six years, we had children together.
09:18She's still one of our incredibly good friends.
09:20But the relationship part of it has fallen aside and turned into more of a friendship.
09:23And that happened a few years ago now.
09:26And since then, we and Eve have continued that lifestyle and dating other people.
09:31We have five kids, Oliver, Dante, Orion, Ivy, and Tori.
09:40Our parenting styles, I would say, really standard actually.
09:44I'm more of a strict parent than he is.
09:46I would say I'm the bad cop.
09:47He's a good cop.
09:48We homeschooling our kids because we believe that standard education is a bit too rigid and not very flexible.
09:55We spend every day with our children, but they have chores they have to complete in the morning.
10:00They're all very advanced, but they're also social.
10:02Our eldest son, at 14, we have spoken to him about people and relationships.
10:07He knows there is monogamy.
10:08He knows there is polyamory.
10:10Could you explain what polyamory is?
10:13Uh, polyamory is dating multiple people at the same time.
10:19When did your parents explain to you about their dating life and their polyamorous relationship?
10:25They didn't really need to explain to me that they were polyamorous.
10:30I kind of figured it out after a while and they did tell me at a certain point.
10:34But I just realized that my dad dated multiple people and that was just normal to me.
10:40When it comes to our children, we didn't really sit down and have a specific conversation about mommy and daddy polyamorous.
10:47So for them, we're just not a friend basically, right? Until about like six months.
10:52Just want to see how the children interact with the person we're dating as well before we get serious with anybody.
10:58Like, and that's important.
10:59Have you met many of your parents' partners?
11:02Uh, we do get to meet them after a while, but not until they feel comfortable with, uh, like making sure that it'll be okay for them to meet us.
11:12In the last four years, despite the fact that we've dated 60 people, there's really only been three that have actually interacted with the kids more than at like a group setting.
11:21When I talk to my friends about Bella, I usually do bring up the fact that she is my parents' partner.
11:28Hi, hon!
11:30Good to see you!
11:32Mwah!
11:33Romantically, we've been together since January, so a couple of months, but I've known them for years.
11:38There was this really awkward moment where I thought Bella really wanted me and maybe didn't really want Eve.
11:45Bella broke it to me that actually she preferred Eve and wasn't really into me.
11:49And she's like, eh, you're okay.
11:51She's like, Eve's like a perfect ten and you're like a six.
11:55Um, that's accurate numbers.
11:58I hadn't really been in a relationship with three people or two other people before.
12:04It's still like a learning progress type of thing.
12:07Since 2020, um, we have dated about 60 people, give or take.
12:12We have definitely dated more than one person at a time, but the dynamic tends to work best when we have the throttle.
12:19Everything else is fun, wild time.
12:21I don't define any specific rules.
12:23It's just a relationship that you make work.
12:26By your own rules.
12:28Family is super accepting.
12:31Friends, mostly accepting.
12:33The friends that aren't accepting have gone.
12:35Yeah, they're not friends, right?
12:36Again, why would I live my life according to someone else's standards, right?
12:40It's my life.
12:41That's not strangers.
12:42We get all kinds of reactions.
12:44Some people are very supportive and ethical of questions.
12:46They're the same.
12:47Which, you know, I answer at the time.
12:49And some, of course, are very detrimental, right?
12:51And tell me that I have no self-esteem or no value.
12:54We absolutely have people try telling us that our lifestyle is going to have some kind of negative impact on our children.
13:00I don't believe our dating life impacts our children in any major way other than to help them be more tolerant and open to other ideals.
13:10Are we the best parents in the world?
13:11Probably not.
13:12Yes, we are.
13:13Probably.
13:14Our children don't get confused about our dating life because we don't make our children part of our dating life.
13:19I think a lot of people in some sense of our dating life think we will just live in a big compound and we have a lot of **** in front of our kids.
13:27So the biggest misconception is that we are too promiscuous and we're damaging our children, basically, which is not against that.
13:34Yeah, I think that's true. That's a massive misconception for us.
13:37Yeah, but still.
13:38How did you feel when Adam and Eve told you that they had five children?
13:43I was definitely a little overwhelmed at first.
13:46But getting to know them, they're so wonderful, they're so cute, and they're so funny.
13:51I can't think if you go first.
13:52My age kind of does help me connect with them on levels that they might not.
13:58I definitely still have a lot more, I don't want to say energy.
14:01You guys still have like a lot of energy, but...
14:04Just throw me in the face, she's in my 20s.
14:06Yeah.
14:07I'm like 80, like...
14:08I mean, you're almost there.
14:10Let me get an adult, I double-check.
14:15Good job!
14:17I'm making a baby.
14:19What are y'all baking today?
14:20We're baking two cakes, a lemon one and a chocolate one.
14:23Well, I'm not that way.
14:24That's how they met her, was as a friend.
14:26And of course, when she was hanging out, she started baking with them and they pretty much fell in love with her.
14:30As our relationship developed, they really just knew Bella as a friend that came over.
14:34And it probably took about two months to an hour of a month before they were like,
14:38okay, wait a minute, this is somebody special.
14:41Push in and pull.
14:42There we go, good job!
14:44She teach me so much that I'm able to do eggs now.
14:48What does it mean to you to see your children and girlfriend bonding like this?
14:52Very, very special, of course.
14:53It's for me the most important part.
14:54Our kids like her and she just fits really well.
14:57The best thing about being in a poly relationship is that, again, you're making your own rules.
15:01It's like you have your cake and eat.
15:04If my children grow up to be happy, wonderful people, that's all I really care about.
15:09I just need them to be happy and to be as successful as they want to be in their own world.
15:14I'm Legend.
15:15I'm Cheetah.
15:16I'm Maya.
15:17And we're the Rebels.
15:18Our children have three parents.
15:19We're great.
15:20Our friends need.
15:21Legend, she's like a super diva.
15:22She's super girly.
15:23She's a cat.
15:24Aries, she's like more calm and laid back.
15:25She's super empathetic.
15:26She's super empathetic.
15:27How old are you?
15:28How old are you?
15:29They put their names together, it's Legend-Aries.
15:30Yeah.
15:32Alright.
15:33Good job.
15:39The twins refer to me as Mommy Maya.
15:41The twins refer to me as Mommy Cheetah.
15:45The twins refer to me as Mommy Cheetah.
15:48The twins refer to me as Mommy Maya.
15:53The twins refer to me as Mommy Cheena.
15:55The twins refer to me as Daddy.
15:57First to start off as a joke.
15:58Their moms call me Daddy.
15:59Usually if kids hear you say somebody's name a lot, they're going to be like, hey Daddy.
16:03So we kept it.
16:06How many sides?
16:08I think the girls love the dynamic simply because they have so much love.
16:13Good job.
16:14The reason that we chose to homeschool them, one, because there's a lot going on in the
16:19schools right now.
16:21And two, I feel like there's a lot that they're missing in schools that they could be taught
16:27at home.
16:31When Maya and I first met, she slid in my DMs.
16:35Now we're together nine years later.
16:38We first decided to open our marriage about four years before Cheena came along.
16:43One fact, I've known her longer.
16:45Yeah.
16:46Yeah.
16:47Yeah.
16:48Me and her were friends for years before we started dating and she knew us when I started
16:54dating Maya.
16:55So I think we had stopped talking for about six years.
16:59She went away to school, lived her life, dated ugly girls.
17:03And then she ended up seeing us on Instagram and she slid in the DMs and was like, hey,
17:09how are you guys?
17:10You're poly now.
17:11And I was like, yes, I am.
17:15The twins were one and a half when I came in.
17:18I met them in May of 2020.
17:21I was not familiarized with polyamory at all.
17:24I was very monogamous.
17:26When I got married to Cheena, not only out of love, but it was for a very legal reason.
17:31It's so that she could have step parent rights to our kids so that if anything ever happened
17:35to me and Maya, that she would not have to fight the court system.
17:38When they got married, I was the witness.
17:40I'm the one that was there when the papers were signed and the words were said.
17:46When did you start having more of an online presence?
17:53I feel like we started having a big online presence during COVID.
17:56Yes.
17:57We were all locked in the house.
17:58Everyone was locked in the house.
17:59What are we going to do?
18:00And it kind of grew us on TikTok.
18:02Three lesbians, you know, one bad, one bad.
18:06We get a lot of responses to our content.
18:08The hate around the kids is a big one.
18:10That our children are going to grow up gay, right?
18:15They're like, you're making the kids gay.
18:17You're confusing the kids.
18:19And I was like, these kids are not confused.
18:21They're highly intelligent children.
18:22Someone on this comment that's judging my family who knows nothing about how smart and
18:28beautiful and loving my kids are.
18:30When people say, oh, you're just going to make your kids gay.
18:32I said, that's okay.
18:34Because it's okay to be gay.
18:35It's nothing wrong.
18:36Yeah, that's true.
18:37They want to be gay like that.
18:38Oh, like there's nothing wrong with being gay.
18:40And there's nothing wrong with being straight.
18:41There's nothing wrong with being bi or pan.
18:43Whatever my kids want to be, at the end of the day, no one can make you do anything.
18:48How we can even have kids.
18:50So that one's still-
18:51Yeah, someone said they're lesbians.
18:52How can they be mothers?
18:53Like that one is still, I'm like, Google.
18:56What?
18:57I think you can Google it.
18:58We have experienced judgment with our relationship dynamic.
19:03Just because they disagree with it, they feel like they have to say something negative.
19:06We don't see too many people of color that are polyamorous relationships.
19:10It's like a very cultural stigma around it.
19:13I think it also circles back around to a lot of black women that are competing with each
19:19other too.
19:20Oh yeah.
19:21People are like, these are your sister wives?
19:23I was like, please don't call them that.
19:24It's not just one solid person at the top with multiple wives.
19:29Their relationship is just as important as our relationship or me and Maya's relationship.
19:32So it's like four little relationships in a big bubble and then we still got to maintain
19:37a relationship with our kids.
19:38Exactly.
19:39The positive comments and the positive DMs and how you're changing other people's lives,
19:48it kind of outweighs the bad.
19:50Goals, it's beautiful how you love each other.
19:54Even though we do get a lot of hate, people also love to see us all together.
19:58When we're out in public, we get a lot of strange reactions.
20:01Or like when people think that you're like cheating or something.
20:04Yes.
20:05That happened where a lady in a grocery store, I gave Maya a kiss and I went to go grab
20:09something and she walked up and I gave her a kiss and this lady was like, how dare you?
20:13You need to be ashamed of yourself.
20:15You ma'am, you need to find someone else because she's cheating on you.
20:20I was like...
20:22One of the key things to make this family work is patience.
20:25A lot of talking, a lot, a lot of talking.
20:28I also feel like being open-minded is also another key factor of being in a polyamorous
20:34relationship.
20:35All right, guys, it's time to go.
20:36Okay, we're coming.
20:37Legend, Aries.
20:38You gotta be cheap.
20:39You gotta be calm to us.
20:40We have the keys ready.
20:41Okay.
20:42Today I have an appointment at the fertility clinic because we are trying to have another
20:53baby.
20:54The doctor will go through results and tell me everything I need to know and give me a schedule,
21:00a timeline.
21:01Good.
21:02How are you?
21:03I'm super excited.
21:04Yeah.
21:05Something we've been wanting to do for a while.
21:07Like the girls are almost five and we tried to do it sooner and it was unsuccessful.
21:12So we're hoping that this time we can have more family, right?
21:16We've all had a conversation about it.
21:18Maya carried the girls and I never got to carry a child.
21:22So we decided that I would carry this time.
21:25And it's something that would be great, you know, to experience.
21:28I've always wanted to do it.
21:31I want her to experience what I experienced because I know how she feels about wanting
21:37to have babies because I felt the same way.
21:41The immediate next steps that we're going to undertake.
21:44You're going to start concentrating on the diet changes.
21:47Then the process of IVF is going to get started.
21:49Okay.
21:50We're really excited to expand our family and I love Dr. Lippman.
21:54She produced these lovely baby girls right here.
21:57So I know that it will be great.
21:59Here are all of your prescriptions.
22:00Okay.
22:01See you in a couple of weeks.
22:02All right.
22:03All right.
22:04Bye.
22:05Bye guys.
22:07Hey girls.
22:08How was your nap?
22:10Guess what tonight is?
22:12The pride parade.
22:13You want to go to the parade?
22:15Yeah.
22:16Okay.
22:17We got to get dressed.
22:18The buttons go in the back.
22:20Okay.
22:21Thank you for telling me.
22:22It's important for us to take the girls to the pride parade just so that they can see more
22:32inclusion, see families that may look like us and just be open-minded overall.
22:37Some of the best things about being in this sort of dynamic is always having someone to talk
22:44to.
22:45It's always a part.
22:46Yeah.
22:47Like constantly supported.
22:49I feel like the best part is that you're always learning something new every day.
22:54Mm-hmm.
22:55Every day.
22:56We got trolls out there saying that we're making our children gay.
23:07So welcome to our big polyamorous family.
23:10I live with my husband and my boyfriend and my boyfriend's wife.
23:13And together we have four happy children.
23:15We're just a normal family like anybody else except that there's more of us.
23:19We're lucky enough to find a house with two masters.
23:21There's one master on each side of the house and then a baby's room across from each master.
23:26And then the two big kid rooms are actually downstairs.
23:28This is mine and my husband Sean's room.
23:30He keeps the majority of his stuff in here.
23:32But he and Tyler actually rotate rooms every other night.
23:36Yeah, it was a little weird at first just not sleeping in my own bed.
23:40But now it's like I get to have a sleepover every night.
23:43Part of our nighttime routine is, do you switch pillows?
23:46No.
23:47Ah.
23:48You gotta go.
23:49Every night.
23:50Every night.
23:51Yeah.
23:52Alisha and I originally started swinging.
23:56It was just an exciting thing to try.
23:58And through that we were lucky enough to meet our other partners Sean and Taya.
24:02We don't consider ourselves swingers anymore.
24:04That's how we met.
24:05But we're polyamorous now.
24:06We're in a closed quad.
24:08We don't date other people anymore.
24:10Head, shoulders, knees and toes.
24:12None of us were polyamorous before we found each other.
24:15I think actually it was Taya that sent the first thing saying, this is us.
24:20This is polyamorous.
24:21And we're like, yeah, that's right.
24:22That's who we are.
24:23When we started talking, we met like that very next week.
24:26And we just wanted to see more and more of each other.
24:29We were making plans for the following weekend before we had even left.
24:33And then again that next weekend.
24:35And I always like to say that once we started talking, we just never stopped.
24:38Ty and I were living in Portland at the time.
24:41So we were driving an hour and a half down here to see them almost every weekend.
24:44Alicia and I were looking at buying a house in the country where we'd have some room for the horses.
24:48And it just made sense to find a house that would work for all of us.
24:51Tyler and I already had two previous children.
25:00I always wanted the third, but it was very difficult to make that decision when there was just two of us.
25:05What happens when you have a mad cow and a mad sheep?
25:09What happens with them?
25:11I don't know.
25:12A me?
25:13Huh?
25:14A me?
25:15No, they're in a bad mood.
25:18I found out that I was pregnant with Barrett and we were all pretty excited.
25:22Show us you're crazy.
25:23Whoop!
25:24Whoop!
25:25Whoop!
25:26Whoop!
25:27Whoop!
25:28Whoop!
25:29Hey!
25:30About a month before Barrett was born, Taya found out she was pregnant.
25:34So we weren't, we weren't regulating who got, who pregnant.
25:39We were just trying in general.
25:40I think that we immediately agreed that we didn't want to know who the dad was.
25:43It wasn't important to us.
25:44We were raising them as all of ours anyway, so it doesn't matter who the father is.
25:49Good thing we do all our shopping at Costco.
25:53You're waving the camera.
25:56What do you like about living as one big family?
26:03There's more parents and it's more fun because I have more people to play with.
26:12Okay, good?
26:13Okay.
26:14At first I was a little bit hesitant to not know who the fathers of Barrett or Carver were
26:24just because I was worried that Dylan and Rayna were going to ask questions and I didn't
26:28want to hide anything from them.
26:31But after talking it through with the other adults in our family and realizing we can
26:35have that conversation when it comes up.
26:37You're going to try and pull yourself up as much as you can, okay?
26:40Pull!
26:41Have you ever personally wondered about it?
26:46Sure, I've wondered about it, but I see Sean as a wonderful daddy to the babies
26:51and I see Tyler as a wonderful dad to them and that's all that really matters.
26:56Pull!
26:57Pull!
26:58Hands right now.
27:00How did your family and close friends respond when you told them?
27:13We've kind of had a mixed bag of experiences with that.
27:16We had some people in our lives who right away were like that's great.
27:21We had some people who were cautious at first or hesitant or had some reservations.
27:26And a lot of people make it about them, about how does it affect us.
27:32It doesn't affect you.
27:33At the end of the day, it doesn't affect you.
27:35We're just telling you because you're part of our lives and everyone has their choices
27:38to either be part of it or not.
27:40A lot of people's initial questions or comments or reactions are,
27:44oh, I can never do that.
27:45I'm too jealous.
27:46And we say, it's okay.
27:47We're not asking you to do it.
27:48We're not trying to convince anybody else to live this lifestyle.
27:51We're just letting you know that this is what our choice is.
27:54The more that you talk to them and educate them, the more accepting they can be.
28:02When we're out in public, people don't really think twice about us
28:07because we present as just two cis, hetero, monogamous couples
28:12who, you know, look like any other couples that are hanging out together
28:16unless they're really paying attention and see,
28:18oh, well, he was holding Taya's hand and then he gave Alicia a kiss.
28:22Sometimes people will do a double take.
28:26People who share their concerns about the kids, you know,
28:30when we're educating them, polyamory is not about sex.
28:33It's about relationship dynamics and loving more than one person.
28:36We're definitely not teaching them polyamory.
28:38We're teaching them that they can love whoever they want
28:40and however many people they want, you know, in a consensual way.
28:44I think that having four parents does make us all better parents
28:49because you get the other side of what you're not normally accustomed to.
28:52I do have older kids and I parented in a certain way
28:55and they had Dylan and Randy before we got there
28:57and they parented a certain way so you get to see both sides of how people parent
29:01and so it makes you more, I feel it makes you a more rounded parent for sure.
29:05We didn't start this because we were missing something.
29:07We realized that we could add something to our lives.
29:09There's no way we could have made it to where we're at now
29:11without a lot of honest, open, and sometimes really hard communication,
29:16you know, talking about what we wanted,
29:18the fact that we wanted this to be a romantic relationship,
29:21how we balance these things and make sure that our existing partners
29:26feel the love that we still have for them.
29:28As long as we're happy, we're gonna stay together.
29:31Hi!
29:36I cook most of the meals, but every once in a while Nelly will, you know,
29:40she'll jump in there and try to do a little something.
29:43Flip it up!
29:44My name is Pandora Monroe.
29:45Everyone that knows me in personal life, I am known as Slim.
29:48So, I have two wives and both of them are, it's never like a competition thing.
29:57They love each other and they're best friends.
30:00Give me a high five!
30:02Oh.
30:03What did they do?
30:05I thought they...
30:06My name is Nelly.
30:07My name is Jay.
30:08And we are sister wives.
30:09All right, let's get into the brother.
30:11At home, it's me, of course, and Nelly and Jay.
30:14Then I have my three children.
30:16We have Maya, she's 13.
30:18We have Kai, he's nine.
30:20And then we have baby boy Mason, and he's three years old.
30:22Mason!
30:25Hey, buddy.
30:26I first met Nelly in 2015.
30:29And I first met Jay in 2016, so it was about a year after.
30:34I'll do the lasagna, and I'll do the salmon.
30:37But y'all figured out how to do salmon at this point.
30:41Did I?
30:42Nelly and I were in a monogamous relationship, and it was a little rocky in the beginning,
30:46because of course we both were young.
30:48And we decided we were gonna take a break, and then when it came down to getting back together,
30:53I was also, another person was interested in me, and I couldn't choose between the two.
31:00So, but that partner at the time, it just didn't work out.
31:03So we got back out there, because Nelly loved having a sister wife, and I loved having another partner.
31:09We started it up with Jay, and we've been smooth-selling ever since.
31:13Nelly, you've mastered like four meals.
31:15Yeah!
31:16Okay.
31:17You got spaghetti.
31:18Spaghetti, for sure.
31:19Baked chicken.
31:20For sure.
31:21Tacos.
31:22Tacos.
31:23For sure.
31:24Do you ever get jealous?
31:25No.
31:26How I think of my wife, I don't think of her as the possession or my property.
31:32So, she's not mine to hold all the time.
31:36And there's time where she don't even want to deal with both of us.
31:39Wait, does tacos and nachos count as two different things?
31:43Because I feel like that's one.
31:44It's one.
31:45You've mastered three meals.
31:47We have a calendar for dates and stuff like that, that we already plan ahead of time.
31:53And we communicate when we want to spend just personal time, just one-on-one times with her.
31:57It's just like the way that our life is set up, it's like we all have our time.
32:02So, we get what we need, so there's no room for anyone to be jealous.
32:08When it comes down to the kids, they look at Nelly and Jay as father figures, not as other mothers.
32:14I'm the mom, and they're the dads.
32:16The experience of becoming a parent to our children.
32:19Come here, baby.
32:20Real quick.
32:21Now I'm the parent, you'll just come over here and I'll just watch it for my brother for a couple of hours.
32:26And they come back for you, so it was a very great learning experience, and I'm still learning.
32:31But I love it.
32:32We figure out our household daily as a whole, as a team, and we get it done.
32:37We're like a buffet for them.
32:39And you know how, like, you got two parents, so you go to one parent, they say no.
32:42You go to the other parent, they might say yes.
32:44They got three chances for that now.
32:48Unless they get caught.
32:49Unless they get caught!
32:51Caught dinner!
32:53Tell me about the best things about having three kids.
32:56The best things are probably always having someone to talk to, always having someone who can, like, be there even when they're busy with the other kids.
33:05I call them Nelly and Jay, but like, on special occasions, or if I'm being funny or something, I'll be like, I'll call Nelly and be like, Papa, I need something!
33:14Or like, Jay, I'll call her dad.
33:17Ah!
33:18Yep, right here.
33:22So, which one is it?
33:23This one?
33:24Alright, so we're gonna do one of our traditional signature, as we call it, our signature videos.
33:29Basically, doing a reveal of my two wives, because, of course, I get that question a lot.
33:35Alright, let me see y'all slides so I can...
33:37Oh, wait.
33:38Let me see y'all a little scapey though, so I can...
33:41Alright, babe.
33:43Of course, here we go again.
33:45I get this question again.
33:47So, for the newcomers and for the people in the back, yes, I do have two wives.
33:54Ta-da!
34:01Nope, you are ready to live!
34:04Oh, opinions, opinions, opinions.
34:08We catch a lot.
34:10We catch a lot of hate.
34:11We catch a lot of judgment.
34:13We get a lot of people saying, oh, you just want your cake and eat it too.
34:18You need to choose between them.
34:20We definitely get, oh, you must love one more than the other.
34:23Of course, we did get, from some family members, that we did get the, you know, the eyebrow raise or the, is this really what you're doing?
34:33When we post something, um, and it's always like, oh my god, I love you guys.
34:38Oh, I love you, I love you.
34:39And then we get the couple of people that'll pop up and be like, oh, this is a sin.
34:44It's like this.
34:45We got the love up here and then we got the haters right here.
34:48Yeah.
34:49But we always say the haters don't got a wristband, so.
34:51Three, two, one.
34:52Oh, shit.
34:53Boop.
34:54They gon' love this.
34:55Did I just take your shoes off?
34:56Oh, yeah, buddy.
34:57Today we have our family photo shoot, and we do one each year.
35:09We just have to capture these moments as much as possible.
35:12Sometimes you just want to get the, that print, the print photo.
35:15So we can blow it up and change it out, put it over the fireplace, and we got those memories.
35:22Hello, hello.
35:23Hi.
35:24Family photo time.
35:25Let's go.
35:26Alright, y'all ready?
35:27Yeah.
35:28Let's do this.
35:35There we go.
35:36Y'all just change it up, alright?
35:37Love it.
35:38Love it.
35:41Say cheese.
35:42Say cheese.
35:43Look at me.
35:44Look at me and say.
35:45Look at her.
35:46Say beep beep.
35:47Beep beep.
35:50That's good.
35:53Say cheese.
35:54I love that.
35:55I mean, me and Kyle was looking a fool right there.
36:02This one?
36:03Oh, yeah.
36:04I think we got it.
36:05I think we got it.
36:06This was definitely a success.
36:09All of us have different personalities, and you can really see it in all the pictures.
36:12And then even down to Maya at the end, she's just modeling it up and everything.
36:17I think it's important to capture the moment as they're here, because you never know.
36:22You never know.
36:23And as we get older, we just got to look back on these memories, and this is my family.
36:31To a successful photo session.
36:33Why you whopping me?
36:35Let's go.
36:36On three, we say Monroe's.
36:37One, two, three.
36:38Monroe's.
36:40Let's go.
36:41Let's go.
36:42Let's go.
36:43I really just want everybody to know that you don't have to live the same relationship
36:46as this person.
36:47You don't have to have the same family dynamics as this person.
36:49And you still can be okay, and everybody can still be happy.
36:52As long as no one's hurting anybody, then you can be happy being yourself.
36:57I have two wives, and our kids love it.
37:04Yay!
37:05You did it!
37:13Hey, hey, hey!
37:14What's up, everybody?
37:15So check this out.
37:16A lot has changed in our lives since the last time we saw you.
37:18We are a polyamorous triad.
37:20We met Ally, and we've been together now for two years.
37:22Okay, okay.
37:23So as you guys know from the last episode, this is my wife, Ally.
37:26This is my wife, Ally.
37:27This is my wife, Emily.
37:28Of course, she remembers Rain.
37:30And this is baby Chicago.
37:32She's two months old, so, you know, everybody say hello.
37:36Lili's biological mom was very supportive.
37:39She's always been there.
37:40She's a great mother.
37:41We raised our daughter to be an amazing child.
37:4416 years old.
37:46And also, we have a new addition to the family.
37:49Hey, guys.
37:51This is Kylie.
37:52Show some love now.
37:54Here, baby.
37:56How does life feel different since Kylie joined your family?
38:00Life has been easier, I'd say.
38:03She's definitely another helping hand.
38:05She's Rain's favorite by far.
38:07She forgot all about us since Kylie's been here.
38:10We wasn't looking for another person to join our relationship.
38:13It just naturally happened that way.
38:15When we met her, she just had a different energy.
38:18We were stuck like glue.
38:20You were saying this is the first time you've been in a multi-partner relationship?
38:24I've always been an open person, so this isn't like far out of my scope.
38:29It's something I definitely was open to.
38:31It just happens to be my first time being in a multi-partner relationship.
38:36Kind of through, you know, mutual friends.
38:40Yeah.
38:41We were around each other.
38:42Yeah.
38:43And then, uh...
38:44We just ended up back.
38:45Yeah.
38:46And then you stayed.
38:47We stole you.
38:48We stole you from the world.
38:51It was like an organic thing.
38:52It wasn't like, will you be my girlfriend or will you be our girlfriend?
38:56Yeah.
38:57It was more so like you came and then you just never left.
39:00So Trell and I are married.
39:02We're not yet married to Ali and Kylie yet.
39:05It's just about the proper timing, you know?
39:08Every woman deserves the proper proposal, I would say.
39:11We do not sleep separately.
39:13That's not our dynamic.
39:14We're literally just like piled onto the bed.
39:17It's exciting.
39:19Were you worried about how the kids would react when Kylie joined the family?
39:23I think our oldest daughter had a little time adjusting to it.
39:27Because all she's known is Emily and Ali.
39:30Now they're like this.
39:32Do you like having two mom things?
39:34No.
39:35No?
39:36Well, she always says...
39:37I like two moms.
39:38Yeah.
39:39She always says two moms.
39:40Kylie's newer to this situation.
39:41Yeah.
39:42She definitely looks at Kylie like a parent figure.
39:44She loves and adores Kylie, but she's still, you know, new to that situation.
39:48So she still says two moms.
39:50You got the seat up?
39:51Yep.
39:52So society tends to think of poly relationships as inappropriate for children.
39:58But that's not the case.
39:59They are not in our love life.
40:01They are in our life as far as we take care of them, we provide for them, and we love them.
40:08So that's all they know.
40:09All they know is they got more love in the house.
40:13Ali is Chicago's biological mom.
40:16Emily is like, you know, her mom as well, so she does the mom duties.
40:21I help with Chicago as well.
40:23We all take care of Chicago.
40:25Everybody is here to make sure the children are being well taken care of.
40:29I don't know how single moms do it because even when it was just like me and Ali, we're still tired.
40:38If I just get like a little bit of a power nap for a few hours, I'll get back up and then she'll go back to sleep.
40:42So we kind of just like alternate and Kylie kind of just like comes in when we need her outside of like what we're doing.
40:47Yeah.
40:48How many more children would we like to have together?
40:50We don't have a number, but that's just more of a natural thing.
40:53If something progresses and it happens, it happens.
40:57I would say one of the challenges of being in a polyquad, sometimes dating.
41:04Just like any other group of people, we have to align our schedules with each other to be able to spend that quality time.
41:10And then we have to get the kids in order and stuff like that.
41:13And then of course, sometimes, you know, if we go, if we all go out as a group, I'm out with three beautiful women, right?
41:19Who in the hell is going to assume they're all mine?
41:24That's true.
41:25Like, it's not like that's a normal thing you come across.
41:28We always get the, yo, yo, who is shorty?
41:32Which one?
41:33Which one can I?
41:34And then they think I'm hating.
41:36They think I'm hating.
41:37They be like, nah, you trying to claim them all.
41:40They not like, bro, these really my ladies?
41:42I'm in a real relationship.
41:43So sometimes they don't realize until they know us.
41:46They're like, oh, this is real.
41:47They really together.
41:48Or we'll bring up the Instagram.
41:49Look!
41:51I would say the negative feedback that we get is people have like an expiration date on our relationship.
41:59So I feel like a lot of people go, oh, that's cute.
42:02It's not going to last.
42:03No, none of them should procreate.
42:06Okay.
42:07If we love each other and we have a family and we're building a family, what does that have to do with you?
42:13Like, why do you have an opinion on other people's families?
42:16You know what I mean?
42:17So I think that's just people just projecting marriage.
42:21Ignorance.
42:22Yeah, it's ignorant pretty much.
42:23He's a pimp.
42:24One of his girls needs to give him an offspring.
42:27New age nonsense.
42:28So let me make this clear.
42:30The person that come in there has no sense.
42:32Because this is the thing.
42:34If I was a pimp, why would I be trying to have children?
42:38Right.
42:39Yeah, that makes no sense.
42:41No, it will screw the kids up.
42:46They said that six years ago.
42:48Just living proof.
42:49They probably will say it again.
42:51They need to focus on raising their own children.
42:53It's a blessing to have multiple people in the home that's caring for you.
42:56Have any of you lost any friends or family along the way?
42:59I personally have lost a couple friends due to the relationship just because of their own personal opinion on it.
43:06And for me, then, good riddance.
43:09Like, if you can't accept how I choose to live my life and love the people that I love, then you don't need to be in love.
43:19If you love one person and that's what you want to do with your life, we completely support that.
43:24We love that for you.
43:25It's just not for us.
43:27It's not what we want to do.
43:28We don't shame monogamous people.
43:30We love love, period.
43:31So if you love one person, if you love T, then that's your business.
43:34Because if you have multiple kids, you're not going to love one child.
43:37There we go.
43:38We love you.
43:39We love you.
43:40We love you.
43:41We love you.
43:42We love you.
43:43My sister essence took a little bit of an issue only because she spoiled.
43:48So she likes her brother to be focused on her for the most part.
43:53I've been meaning to ask you, you know, how do you feel about me being in a poly relationship?
43:58I don't think I ever actually asked you that question.
44:00It'd be like my only little dynamic through it is the sharing part.
44:03But that's been since I was little.
44:05But I feel like it takes a village, so it doesn't really like affects me in no way.
44:09Or do I feel like it affects my nieces?
44:10So it's like, it's a good thing for me.
44:12It's just heavy on the sharing part.
44:14No, that's real.
44:15And then, you know, you a mother.
44:19How do you feel about being poly?
44:21Do you think it impacts children negatively?
44:23No, I think being poly is like, it is what you make it.
44:26A parent is a parent.
44:27It don't matter how many parents it is.
44:29If Rain gets to go to school, she can teach the other kids.
44:31Like, this don't affect me at all.
44:32I just know I'm getting loved by multiple people.
44:34That's it.
44:35I appreciate that, sis.
44:38Go, go, go, go.
44:40I think that the polyamorous parenting is taboo because nobody really sees it.
44:47Even if they see it, like, on social media and stuff, like, it's not something, like, they know personally.
44:53We just want to keep building, keep doing content.
44:57Growing.
44:58I know that's our goal.
44:59Everybody, you know, used to say, they say, oh, you guys weren't going to last.
45:03And this is just temporary love.
45:06And look at us now, six years later.
45:09Now, in a new relationship, a great relationship with Kylie.
45:13They say that it takes a village to raise a kid.
45:17Well, this is mine.
45:18Yeah.
45:21Okay.
45:22Her crazy self.
45:24Wow, she got that time break.
45:26We know the future for us will be everything we dream of and imagine.
45:31But I, thearah, thellie, theando.
45:35Letup movie.
45:36From theantically looking at them.
45:37No.
45:38entiary.
45:39This is the Mandalorian.
45:40We're just showing.
45:41Yeah.
45:42Team machine.
45:43Hell.
45:44onze.
45:45Two.
45:46Two.
45:47Two.
45:48Three.
45:49One.
45:50People.
45:51Foods or something.
45:52My dog.
45:53My dog.
45:54Can해요.
45:55With biologicalalition.
45:56You.
Be the first to comment