- 3 months ago
Rick brings a new woman to Emily's birthday party in order to make Melissa jealous.
(Season 1, Episode 14)
(Season 1, Episode 14)
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TVTranscript
00:00Hey, Dad.
00:09Happy birthday.
00:11Oh, thank you.
00:12Today, we are throwing a big birthday luncheon for Emily.
00:15Melissa decided that she was taking charge of it.
00:17Sorry I'm so late.
00:18Have you been sitting here waiting for me forever?
00:20I'm really, really pissed off at Missy.
00:22I had a schedule.
00:23I said 11 o'clock for a reason.
00:24When you offer to do something around here,
00:26everybody gets pissed.
00:27What are we waiting for?
00:28We're not waiting for anything.
00:30Go.
00:31Go what?
00:32Rick's mad.
00:33Shauna's mad.
00:34Missy's mad.
00:35Dad's mad.
00:36You know?
00:37And to me, it's like it's only lunch.
00:58Does anybody know what's going on today?
01:13I know I'm busy back there.
01:14That's why I'm dressed like this.
01:15You set up lunch for everybody at noon for Emily's birthday.
01:18I'm going to pass, Melissa.
01:19I have no gear.
01:20All right.
01:21Let's rock and roll.
01:23Emily's a St. Valentine's Day baby.
01:25And we have never thrown a party for Emily since she was like eight.
01:29No.
01:30I remember on her 16th birthday.
01:32Okay.
01:33But dad, that was like 15 years ago.
01:35Soul.
01:36She always gets screwed.
01:40And then tonight, we're going to have a little celebration at my friend's house.
01:44You're coming, right?
01:45How are we dressing?
01:46Nice.
01:47Dressed nicely.
01:48Hi.
01:49Hi.
01:50Hi, Rick.
01:51Hey, bud.
01:52What you doing?
01:53I have no idea what the plans are.
01:56Did she screw up?
01:57I have no idea.
01:58Well, Rick called me and said, did you order lunch?
02:01I said, no, Missy did.
02:03He said, mother.
02:04Effort.
02:05Click.
02:07All I can say is, she better have this on the table at 11 o'clock and it better be good.
02:13I believe it.
02:14I believe it.
02:16Today's going to be extremely busy for me.
02:19So I need to like start working on it right away.
02:22I asked Shauna to pull a lunch together.
02:24I just found out Melissa decided that she was taking charge of it.
02:27So who knows?
02:28We may end up with Taco Bell if she's in charge of it.
02:30You know, things have been horrible with Rick and with Melissa.
02:35Melissa and Rick are officially no longer a couple.
02:38Yeah, it's over.
02:39I have my ring back.
02:40It's in the safe deposit box.
02:41They're both still, you know, a little sensitive.
02:44I think Rick, of course, you know, more than Melissa.
02:46She's told me a dozen times I need to move on.
02:49Apparently, there's a woman that has kind of had her eye on Rick, so to speak.
02:55Tonight, Rick is going to bring a woman.
02:58Her name is Lori and she's a writer.
03:00I said, if you want to go to a birthday party with me and have some fun, I'd like that a lot.
03:05And she said, sounds like fun, I'll do it.
03:07Melissa was absolutely curious about it and appalled.
03:10I told her I wanted her to look hot.
03:12You know, I don't blame Rick.
03:13He doesn't want to show up alone.
03:15She's got great legs.
03:16So I said, wear a dress.
03:18I just hope it's cool and everybody's cool and it doesn't turn into a Jerry Springer show.
03:23So, I mean, I think initially meeting the woman will be a little awkward for everyone.
03:30If it is uncomfortable for anybody, we'll leave.
03:33It's not a big deal.
03:34I just want to be there to say happy birthday to Emily.
03:36She hasn't had a birthday party since she was eight years old.
03:38We talk about a dysfunctional childhood.
03:41That's my baby girl's birthday.
03:50My little Emily.
03:52God.
03:53All those years.
03:55Where did they go?
03:56You know?
03:57Doggone it.
03:59The goops.
04:01Happy birthday, Emily.
04:05Happy Valentine's Day.
04:07Hey, listen.
04:08Did you get that lunch planned?
04:10Who's picking it up?
04:12Oh, you're going to be here.
04:14Oh, good.
04:15Well, then I'll see you when you get here.
04:17Bye.
04:18Can you go to the bank for me?
04:19Yes.
04:20Happy birthday.
04:21All right.
04:22You know what?
04:23I got to get moving on the next one.
04:24He's finished.
04:30Oops.
04:31You know what?
04:32I really don't have time to do this right now.
04:34When I want the correct time, I look at the time clock.
04:37It's almost 1130 and no sign of Melissa.
04:42Have a great day all.
04:44What does that mean?
04:46Have a great day all, Emily.
04:50Have a great day all.
04:53Why not?
04:54Y'all.
04:55With a Y in front of it.
04:56Here, let me do that.
04:58Here we go.
04:59Have a great day, y'all.
05:01Have a great day, y'all.
05:02Have a great day, y'all.
05:04Uh, are you across the street?
05:07Or are you here?
05:09Bye.
05:10Yeah, she's not going to answer.
05:12So here we are going on two hours after the party was supposed to take place.
05:17No Missy.
05:18We had a schedule.
05:19I said 11 o'clock for a reason.
05:21It wasn't an arbitrary number.
05:22At five minutes to 11, Missy called and said she was running a few minutes behind and would
05:29somebody else please grab Pop.
05:31I can't, I'm speechless.
05:35I've got time constraints.
05:37Everybody else has time constraints and appointments.
05:40She's got nothing to do but get that lunch here.
05:43Hi guys.
05:44I'm really late.
05:53Okay, let the party begin.
05:58Missy was supposed to be here at 11 o'clock with everything set up.
06:03I'm sure it's probably 12.30.
06:05Um, oh, excuse me, um, quarter to one.
06:08Sorry I'm so late.
06:09Have you been sitting here waiting for me forever?
06:11I'm really, really pissed off at Missy.
06:13I'm just, I'm just livid with her.
06:14I spent an hour on the freeway.
06:16There was a four car accident in the fast lane.
06:19Missed my nail appointment.
06:21Totally made me late getting all this food and picking up the cake and everything.
06:27Oh, thanks baby.
06:29You're my helper.
06:31It's Emily's first birthday party here.
06:34Nobody's had anything to eat and it's almost frigging one o'clock.
06:38As you can see, when you offer to do something around here, nobody appreciates a damn thing.
06:43And everybody gets pissed if things aren't the way that they expect it to be.
06:48So tough, you know what I'm saying?
06:50Oh, pretty pretty.
06:52It's my cake.
06:53Oh, wait a minute.
06:54I'm not supposed to be here.
06:55Yeah.
06:56Oops, sorry.
06:57Okay.
06:58Get out of here.
06:59I can't even say anything to you right now.
07:04I'm so angry.
07:05But what is this?
07:07What do you mean what is it?
07:09This doesn't look like lasagna, salad and garlic bread.
07:11Well, you know, lasagna is a hundred dollars.
07:14And for the price of one tray of gross lasagna, I was able to get much nicer food.
07:19You know what?
07:20You can't even make it for your own birthday party.
07:21But yet you want to take charge of this whole thing?
07:23We waited three hours for you on your birthday to cut your cake.
07:26What is this?
07:28What are you talking about?
07:30Rick?
07:31You have no recollection of that?
07:36And why is it now 20 minutes to lunch?
07:39Because there was an accident on the freeway.
07:42Other people have schedules here.
07:44I realize that.
07:45I spoke with Emily and she told me that...
07:48You know what?
07:50I had a doctor's appointment.
07:51I had to cancel it because the lunch wasn't here at 11.
07:54Okay.
07:55Emily did not tell me 11.
07:57Okay?
07:58She told me noon.
08:09Dad, will you get out of here?
08:11Okay?
08:12Mommy tell him this.
08:14Get the f*** out of here.
08:18What?
08:19Yeah, go.
08:20I called Emily and she said everybody was busy and she said if you're caught in traffic,
08:31no big deal.
08:32What are we waiting for?
08:33We're not waiting for anything.
08:34Go.
08:35Go what?
08:36Get a plate and start eating.
08:38I just walked in the door and she's yelling at me.
08:42Why don't you get a plate and eat?
08:43Don't worry about it.
08:44Don't worry about it.
08:45Don't worry about it.
08:46So are we eating?
08:47I guess.
08:48I mean, if you choose to eat that s***.
08:50Well, I don't know what it is.
08:51It came from the grocery store.
08:52I think we always have lasagna salad and garlic bread.
08:55Because everybody likes it.
08:56It's good.
08:57It's hot.
08:58It's nice lunch.
08:59A little festive.
09:00But apparently we're not having that this time.
09:03He's a first-class ass s***.
09:05That is what I've determined.
09:12Ooh, looks good.
09:13That's yum.
09:15Did he not know that I called about 12 times?
09:20Yeah, I told him.
09:21I kept him up to date.
09:22Okay.
09:23Where is he?
09:24Is he here?
09:25He's acting as if he didn't know that I was going to be late.
09:27Let's see, it looks lovely.
09:28Ask Dad.
09:29It took me an hour to get from downtown.
09:32I am so pissed off at her.
09:34You know, anything that has to do with time, space, and distance.
09:37I really can't go in there anyway because I have very bad embalming I'm dealing with.
09:41Well, Emma is so gracious.
09:43She's just, I mean, it's her birthday and she wants everybody to be happy.
09:48I guess we should be happy.
09:49Put on your happy face.
09:52Thanks for lunch, miss.
09:54But like my mortuary and college instructor used to say when I came rolling in three hours
09:58late on the back of my ex-husband's Harley.
10:01How nice of you to join us, Miss Weissmiller.
10:05Come on, guys, eat.
10:08He's giving me a hassle because he wants to be a jerk.
10:11Like he should be a jerk.
10:12I should be a jerk to him since he's bringing a date tonight, don't you think?
10:17I don't know anything about her.
10:19Supposedly they just mess, but I doubt that.
10:26She was genuinely pissed that I had a date.
10:29And probably hurt.
10:30Sure.
10:31And I got to tell you, I mean, this whole thing started out as I'm going to make Melissa jealous.
10:35Right.
10:36And then I realized how sophomoric that is.
10:38None of us are 16 years old.
10:39It's not like somebody stealing somebody's boyfriend and all that crazy crap, you know?
10:43I mean, what I'm doing is not healthy.
10:45Right.
10:46And it's hurtful.
10:47And the last thing I ever want to do is to hurt Melissa.
10:50Hey, Em.
10:51Yes.
10:52Can you listen to me for a minute?
10:53Okay.
10:54I realized that when Melissa came in with the lunch late, that I was much angrier than
10:59I should have been.
11:00And I know enough about myself to know that it goes so much farther than that.
11:05Okay.
11:06And I just can't be around her right now.
11:09So you're saying you're not coming to the party?
11:12I'm going to have to bail out.
11:13I can't do it.
11:14I just can't be with her.
11:15I would really like you to be there.
11:16And I would really like to meet this girl too.
11:18And I really wish you would reconsider.
11:20Please, will you reconsider?
11:21I can't do it.
11:22I know, but everything's falling apart.
11:23You know, maybe.
11:24Nothing is planning the way I wanted it to be.
11:27Really, Rick, don't you think you can do it?
11:29I don't think I can.
11:32Okay.
11:33Well, if that's what...
11:37I love you, sweetheart.
11:38I love you too, Rick.
11:41And I'm sorry.
11:42Yeah, me too.
11:47Emily, what about tonight?
11:49Who's going with more?
11:50We have to be to Marley's at 7.
11:52Donna needs a ride from the mortuary.
11:54I don't know.
11:55I don't know.
11:56And I don't know.
11:57How's that?
11:58How about I just stay home and you guys just go to the party?
12:00Because y'all are stressing me out.
12:02I just have one question for you.
12:04What might that be?
12:05Will you be my Valentine?
12:09Of course I will.
12:10Have a happy party.
12:12Please tell Emily to be happy.
12:13Reconsider.
12:14Show up.
12:15He won't.
12:16Oh, God, no.
12:17Once Rick makes a decision, he's not going to change his mind.
12:20Everybody will be able to relax now.
12:22We'll have a lot of fun tonight.
12:26Well, for what started out to be a fairly quiet day, it was pretty crazy around there today.
12:37I have no idea how Melissa got involved in it, but everybody should know better than I have Melissa get involved in anything like that.
12:43God only knows what she was doing.
12:46I'm going in to buy some booze.
12:48I'm going to spend my night watching television and getting drunk.
12:57Thank God for a wild turkey.
13:06I'm not going to the party.
13:07I'm just going to fix dinner and watch television.
13:09That's all.
13:10Let him go have a good time.
13:12I'll stay here.
13:16I'm going to park right here.
13:18How am I doing on the edge?
13:19I don't know.
13:20I can't see.
13:21I'm going to take a shower and get cleaned up.
13:26Hi, guys.
13:27Hi.
13:34Tonight, we are getting ready to celebrate Emily's birthday at my best friend Marley's home in Carlsbad.
13:41I hope Brick is happy.
13:42I hope Brick is happy.
13:43That's all anybody can wish for a person is for the person to be happy.
13:48Yeah, I love you too.
13:49That's the only place you're going to get it.
14:01Come on, bud.
14:02Let's take a walk.
14:03Let's go see what Cadillac Jack's up to.
14:04I don't really want to spend the rest of my life alone.
14:18I might do that, but I don't know that I want to.
14:21I really believe that Melissa and I were going to be married, and I really had kind of the
14:27expectations of having that sort of fulfillment in my life.
14:33We've spent two and a half years together, and it's killing me.
14:37It's absolutely killing me.
14:38I can't eat.
14:39I can't sleep.
14:40I'm shaking.
14:41I'm really grieving.
14:45I'm just getting out of the shower.
14:47Can I call you back?
14:48Okay.
14:49Okay.
14:50Okay.
14:51Rick.
14:52He said he had something very, very, very important to tell me.
14:56And I said, well, you know, I just can't do it right now because I'm just getting out
15:01of the shower, which is technically true.
15:03Okay.
15:04Are you ready to roll here?
15:05If you could give me two minutes.
15:06We need to go.
15:07All right.
15:08All right.
15:09All right.
15:10We'll be there in less than five minutes.
15:11Okay.
15:12Bye.
15:13All right.
15:14Let's go.
15:15Start your car.
15:16We're leaving.
15:17You don't have a beer in there, do you?
15:18Yes.
15:19Let me take it.
15:20Will you?
15:21I was supposed to bring Diet Coke.
15:24Jesus.
15:29Yes.
15:30Emily.
15:31I'm here.
15:32Yes.
15:33Come on, mom.
15:34Get in.
15:35All right.
15:36Emily, we are getting on the freeway to go right now.
15:38Don't worry about it.
15:39I'll drive.
15:40I had a half a drink.
15:41I'm fine.
15:42Okay.
15:43Bring your cell phone and I'll walk you through it.
15:44Yeah.
15:45Screw that.
15:46You know what?
15:47They were all supposed to come over here and then we were going to decide who's driving
15:49with whom.
15:50And I'll take two cars.
15:52But instead they just decided to go on their own.
15:54Shawna's infamous for doing that.
15:56The fact is we're here.
15:58We're on our way.
15:59Is there really a cop behind us?
16:00I have my keys.
16:01You want my keys or your keys?
16:02I don't care.
16:03Let's go.
16:04How was your day today, honey?
16:05My day was fine.
16:06I mean, other than all the bullshit that went on.
16:07Yeah.
16:08Marlee, we are crawling along at three miles an hour here.
16:10It's the typical Weissmiller clown car routine.
16:11So, anyway, call me when you get this message, please.
16:12Still on the way to my birthday.
16:13Oh, I didn't wear my watch.
16:14What time is it, Ron?
16:15I hate you late.
16:16Marlee, we're so sorry about our tardiness.
16:17I'm, like, going to kill everybody.
16:18Come on, Ron.
16:19Can you find out where it is?
16:20Would you stop yelling at me?
16:21Well, this is ridiculous.
16:22Hi, we're here.
16:23I'm happy to see you, too.
16:24Knock, knock.
16:25Knock, knock.
16:26Knock.
16:27Knock.
16:28Knock.
16:29Knock.
16:30Knock.
16:31Knock.
16:32Knock.
16:33Knock.
16:34Knock.
16:35Knock.
16:36Knock.
16:37Knock.
16:38Knock.
16:39Knock.
16:40Knock.
16:41Knock.
16:42Knock.
16:43Knock.
16:44Knock.
16:45Knock.
16:46Happy birthday.
16:47Happy birthday.
16:48Happy birthday.
16:49Is she beautiful, Miss Lee?
16:51Who are you talking about Melissa?
16:53I should probably call Rick, huh?
16:58He's going to be pissed.
16:59He told me to call him right back.
17:02Please don't hate me because I'm beautiful.
17:05I'm so sorry I didn't call you right back.
17:07Now, what were you going to, you said you had something to tell me.
17:10Do you remember?
17:11Okay.
17:12All right.
17:13Are you serious, Rick?
17:18Oh, don't say that.
17:22Well, babe, we always got each other, right?
17:25Um, I, I, we're just getting ready to sit down and eat, so will you be up for a while?
17:32Of course I will.
17:34I promise.
17:35All right, bye.
17:36Um, I just want you to know that Rick called me crying and upset and, um, you know, maybe you should call him or whatever.
17:44So.
17:45Why do you think you should call him yourself?
17:46I don't think so.
17:47Well, maybe it'll help.
17:48No, it won't.
17:49It won't.
17:50Okay.
17:51Well, why don't you just call him yourself?
17:54Why don't you call him?
17:55I'm not calling him now.
17:56You know what?
17:57Do not call him again.
17:58You know what?
17:59No.
18:00Because this is going to go on continuous and there's no point in you ruining your night anymore.
18:04Why don't you just go down and...
18:05Mom, tell me, please.
18:06What am I supposed to do?
18:07No, Mom.
18:08What am I supposed to do?
18:09He left me the most beautiful message.
18:10He said, Sean, I want you to know that I will always love you.
18:14Shut the door.
18:15Shut the door.
18:16Hi, honey.
18:18Listen to me.
18:19Get a hold of yourself.
18:21What?
18:28No, but you know what?
18:30You promised me that you were going to be strong for me and you were going to be there for me.
18:44And I'm counting on you.
18:46I lean on you and rely on you every day of my life.
18:50And if I've never said that to you before, I apologize and I'm telling you now.
18:55And I hope that you know that.
18:57Who are you talking to?
18:58Rick?
18:59You have to be strong.
19:01I want to talk to him for a minute, please.
19:04He's crying.
19:05Don't be hard.
19:06I don't care.
19:07I won't.
19:08Don't be hard, Ron.
19:09Please.
19:10Please.
19:11Hey, Rick.
19:12It's Ronnie.
19:13Tell him.
19:14Oh, nothing, man.
19:15What are you doing, buddy?
19:16He said, I love you, but I can't go on anymore.
19:17And I said, Rick, you promised me that you were going to try and move on.
19:21Anyways, you know what, Rick?
19:22I love you.
19:23Rick, Rick, will you make me one promise, please?
19:30Rick, and I love you too, but you have to make me one promise before you hang up.
19:35Can you do that for me?
19:36And Rick, you told me, you told me once you'd do anything for me.
19:44And that is the only barrier because you know my heart's with you.
19:49And it always has been, Rick.
19:51And I love you too, but you have to make me a promise, though.
19:55And that is that you will make it through the night, that you will not do anything crazy, and you'll be strong.
20:05Yes, he will be fine.
20:07Absolutely.
20:08Otherwise, if I was concerned, I would, um, you know, I wouldn't just, like, let it lie.
20:17That's not right.
20:19Tell him you love him, Mom.
20:20Tell him you love him.
20:21Listen, we love you, Rick.
20:23You gotta, you know, you gotta keep it.
20:27I know.
20:28You are someone special.
20:29You have something to offer someone.
20:31And this just didn't work out.
20:33Mom, what do you think?
20:35I think things will be okay.
20:36I think it's just a bad night.
20:39Bad night.
20:40I agree.
20:41I think things will be okay tomorrow.
20:55Rick seems a different person already today.
20:57He's going to bring in this new lady that he just started dating.
21:01This is Laurie.
21:02Hi, Laurie.
21:03She's pretty game, huh?
21:04Walk into this.
21:05Hi, Sean.
21:06I'm Sean.
21:07Pleasure to meet you.
21:08Pleasure to meet you, too.
21:09She's cute, yeah.
21:10Nice to meet you.
21:11She's really 44.
21:12Yeah.
21:13Everyone, it was really great meeting you.
21:15You know, we, um, spent a lot of time together this weekend.
21:18I want you to be with someone that's going to make you happy.
21:21That's all.
21:22Thanks for being my best friend.
21:25Oh, that's what I'm here for.
21:27You gonna walk me to my car?
21:28Yeah.
21:39Well I know all the time about this.
21:40But if I need a to do mom...
21:41ThanHey new modus face.
21:43Yeah.
21:44I wanna walk you.
21:45Yeah.
21:46Yeah.
21:47We're welcome.
21:48Bye.
21:49See you,
21:51Bye.
21:56Today I'm the hero.
21:58Going with me.
22:00I'm greet you barely out of one.
22:02I love you,ailleurs.
22:03Go there.
22:04On my journey.