- 4 months ago
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00:00Satsang with Mooji
00:30It's him. It's him. Frank! Frank! I knew he'd be on this one today. Sometimes he comes
00:49on an early one, but I knew he'd be on this one today. Frank! Frank! Frank! Frank! Frank!
00:59Frank! Frank! Frank! Frank! I love you, Frank! I want to have your pullover!
01:19Frank! I only want to touch you.
01:22Leave me alone.
01:29Frank!
01:30Frank!
01:31Well? How did you get on? Oh, come on, tell me, tell me. Oh, please!
01:44Well, have you done it? Oh, yes, sorry.
01:45This is the first official Frank information pack. Complete with a badge. Oh! Oh! Oh!
01:59A special personalised photograph.
02:00Where is he?
02:01He's behind the elephant. I'll take your word for it.
02:02Now, favourite colour? Don't know. Favourite food? Food. Favourite place? Don't know.
02:03Happiest moment? Don't know.
02:04Don't know.
02:05What annoys you most?
02:06No?
02:07badge a special personalized photograph where is he he's behind the elephant I'll take your word
02:21for it now favorite color don't know favorite food food favorite place don't know happiest moment
02:31what annoys you most don't know marital status married bitch bitch bitch yoga yoga Linda Linda
02:41if you weren't a news agent our husband oh it's beautiful special surprise what we're going
02:54round to his house for tea look just just blinking get out of it please look just blinking get out of it
03:20please look just blinking get out of it please right I'm going to call the police right I'm going
03:28to call the police right I'm going to call the police right I'm going to call the clip
03:33Oh, my God.
04:03Oh, my God.
04:33Oh, my God.
05:03Oh, my God.
05:33Oh, my God.
06:03Oh, my God.
06:33And, hey, you're going to love this.
06:35Oh, my God.
07:05Oh, my God.
07:07Oh, my God.
07:09Oh, my God.
07:11Oh, my God.
07:12Oh, my God.
07:13Oh, my God.
07:15Oh, my God.
07:17Oh, my God.
07:19Oh, my God.
07:21Oh, my God.
07:22Oh, my God.
07:23Oh, my God.
07:24Oh, my God.
07:26Oh, my God.
07:27Oh, my God.
07:28Oh, my God.
07:29Oh, my God.
07:30Oh, my God.
07:31Oh, my God.
07:32Well, there was no mention of it in hammers and hammering.
07:36But I couldn't sworn I heard an early warning siren only last night.
07:40No, Denzil, what you heard was an early warning of something unpleasant up your bottom.
07:45All right, Gwyneth, all right.
07:47Well, if the war are over, this calls for a bit of a celebration.
07:51Time bred up of my homemade wine.
07:53Oh, lovely.
07:56And what are it this time, Denzil?
07:58Halibut.
08:00Fish for wine?
08:02Oh, yes, Gwyneth. Fish are ideal for making wine.
08:06There's a lot of them, and they're all wet.
08:09I'm particularly pleased with my halibut, although the sardines are very good this year as well.
08:14You go and get the dinner ready, and I'll pour the wine.
08:18All right.
08:19Oh, yes.
08:20Turbent.
08:21Il.
08:22Sprat.
08:23Smelt.
08:24Gunned.
08:25Lass.
08:26Sprat, smelt, gönnert, lass.
08:45Here, a cheeky little wine.
08:47Best thing, Jim, I'm quite sticky as hell.
08:56Oh, Denzil, Mr... from next door came round this morning
09:03to complain about the smell from last night's cheese and wine party.
09:07He said the Stilton kept him awake till 3 o'clock in the morning.
09:11Good. And what have we got here?
09:14Oh, a nice bit of home cooking.
09:16Yes, and which particular part of the home will this taste like?
09:22Big fair carpet, I think.
09:26Yes, Gwyneth. Go and see, Doctor will see you know about that asthma of yours.
09:32And while you're there, see if you can do something about your cooking as well.
09:35Biff.
09:36Eugh. Eugh.
09:47You want something else? We'll join the joke.
09:49Oi!
09:53That can't be even.
09:54Sleeping. No name for that, see. I never sleep.
10:00That was me having a little rest, see you on.
10:02Nobody can sneak up on you that way.
10:04My old dad, he never slept and he lived to be 89.
10:08And then he was 90.
10:11Then he was 73.
10:14He was very unpredictable, see.
10:16Like me, like me, I'm very unpredictable.
10:27Come on.
10:29I'm very happy.
10:36I have no more knowledge.
10:37I don't know.
10:39I want to be happy.
10:44I love you.
10:48I love you.
10:49I love you.
10:51I love you.
10:53I love you.
10:54I didn't expect that, but it was.
11:24I didn't expect that, but it was.
11:54I'm fine with this.
11:59Swimming upstairs, we'll get my trunks, man.
12:08Here we go.
12:11Very nice.
12:13Oh, very nice, yes.
12:16Delightful, yes indeed.
12:19Very well proportioned, isn't it?
12:22Yes.
12:23Oh, it's a nice view.
12:24Yes, you can see right into our sitting room from here.
12:27George, you don't think we're lacking a sort of sense of adventure here, do you?
12:30No, no, no.
12:31You can't be too careful on your holidays.
12:33No, it's just that when you said we were going to get away from it all, I really did expect
12:36to get slightly further than 35 yards away from it all.
12:40There's such a face and wants to tell her.
12:43Fair enough.
12:47What's on?
12:48Oh, it's the news.
12:49Oh, yes.
12:50Let me see.
12:51Good Lord.
12:52Anna Ford looks her age from this distance, doesn't she?
12:57Yes, yes.
12:58Oh, you've left a slipper in the toaster again.
13:01Damn.
13:02Picture's gone.
13:04Telly's broken.
13:05No.
13:06What are we going to do?
13:07The weather report's on in ten minutes, you know?
13:09What happens if I miss the weather report?
13:10Don't panic, don't panic.
13:11Look, there's bound to be a television in the hotel.
13:12Phone room service.
13:13Right, right, right.
13:14Go on.
13:15Hello, room service?
13:19Can we have a room, please?
13:21Oh, we've got a room.
13:22Oh, sorry, it appears we have a room.
13:24Teleporter, not to bother.
13:25Tele-tele-television, yes.
13:27Could you tell...
13:28Where's our television, please?
13:30In the room.
13:31Right.
13:32And where's the room again?
13:34I'm in it.
13:35Oh, fine, right.
13:36Right, fine.
13:38Well?
13:39Well, we've got a room.
13:40The television's in the room.
13:42I'm in the room.
13:44Therefore, I'm the television.
13:46Interesting theory, Don, but we have little evidence to support your philosophical findings, eh?
13:50A simple scientific test should see us right.
13:53Now, the weather is due on in precisely 15 seconds.
13:56If, in 15 seconds, you tell me the weather, then we're home and dry.
14:00Right.
14:01Okay.
14:02Three, two, one...
14:06Right.
14:07We have proven that you're not the television.
14:09So...
14:10Right.
14:11We must split up into two groups of one.
14:14You look for TV.
14:15I'll make the coffee.
14:16Right.
14:17So...
14:18Strange not inside the lamp.
14:23Let's keep our bin now.
14:24Not there.
14:25Don't, don't, don't.
14:26I think we may have something here.
14:28I've got a double video, no?
14:29Oh!
14:30It is one of these cabinet calibers.
14:31Oh, right.
14:32Yeah.
14:33Can't shoot to find the doors.
14:34Well, might as well.
14:35Oh!
14:36It's a habit.
14:37I have a double video, no?
14:39Oh!
14:40It's one of these cabinet calibers.
14:41Oh!
14:42Yeah!
14:43Can't shoot to find the doors.
14:44Well, might as well.
14:45Can't shoot to find the doors.
14:49Well, I might as well.
14:53Oh, it's him! It's, er... Len Zeppelin!
14:57Oh, no, no, it's that other mob. Your favourites.
15:01Oh, they've... they dozy, sleepy,
15:05trumpet... they dozy.
15:09They dozy, sleepy,
15:13sleepy, Trumpy,
15:17Mick, Ringo, George,
15:19Tuesday, Lust, Avarice,
15:23The Hanging Gardens of Babylon,
15:25Elvis,
15:27and Titch.
15:29Titch, yes.
15:31It's a good name!
15:37Bit of an abrupt ending.
15:39Over an hour till the weather.
15:41Well, let's enjoy our holiday, shall we?
15:43Right, yes, and...
15:45Hello!
15:47What have we here?
15:49Looks like the shower.
15:53Yep, thought so.
15:55It's a bit small, no?
15:57More and more and more of us...
15:59Oh, it's broken.
16:01Room service, come on. Right.
16:03Hello?
16:05Hello, it's the man in the room again.
16:07Yes, yes.
16:09Could you send someone up to fix our shower, please?
16:11It appears to be broken. Yes, there's a...
16:13Yes, there's a car in it.
16:15Lovely, thank you. Love you!
16:17One more.
16:23Uh, Mrs Outpatient.
16:24Hmm?
16:25The doctor will see you now.
16:26Oh, right-o.
16:27Oh, thank you very much.
16:29Do you know, I couldn't eat another thing.
16:31Well, bye, then.
16:32Bye-bye.
16:33Oh, pardon me.
16:34That's OK.
16:35Don't worry.
16:37God, I'm peckish.
16:50Excuse me, I don't want to intrude, but I'm terribly peckish.
16:54I'm wondering, could you possibly have a yank at the end of my...
17:00There.
17:01Of course.
17:02Like that, yeah.
17:04Oh!
17:05Um, do you mind if I, um...
17:11No, no, no, no.
17:12Go ahead, go ahead.
17:22So, um, why are you come to see the doctor anyway?
17:26Oh, nothing much.
17:28I just can't seem to stick to my diet.
17:31Speak to his diet, man.
17:35Was there a joke, was there, man?
17:36Ah, disgusting!
17:38It's disgusting!
17:44The importance of childhood experiences is terribly important.
17:48Our parents can influence us more than they know.
17:51And leave us with legacies...
17:53More than they know...
17:55About.
17:57As a child, John, my name not his, was allowed out to play whenever he liked.
18:02Now, aged 34, John spends his entire time outside.
18:07Where are they parents?
18:08Well, I do, actually.
18:09John's parents.
18:10Well, it's difficult to know what to say, really.
18:13I mean, of course, we let John outside to play.
18:16What parent wouldn't?
18:17But, you see, the trouble with John is...
18:19He's just...
18:20He's...
18:21He's just...
18:22He's such a...
18:23Wanker.
18:24Yes.
18:25He's a wanker.
18:27Alan, my name not his, has a problem, also.
18:30As a child, Alan used to play a strange game with his father.
18:32As the football scores were edited, it's difficult to know what to say, really.
18:34I mean, of course, we let John outside to play.
18:36What parent wouldn't?
18:37But, you see, the trouble with John is...
18:38He's just...
18:39He's just...
18:40He's such a...
18:41Wanker.
18:42Yes.
18:43He's a wanker.
18:45Alan, my name not his, has a problem also.
18:48As a child, Alan used to play a strange game with his father.
18:51As the football scores were read out in TV, Alan would hide behind the settee and try
18:56and guess the away team score from the intonation of the announcer's voice.
19:01Alan is now 35 years old.
19:04Manchester 92, Manchester City.
19:11Arsenal 1, Chelsea.
19:13Southampton 4, Derby County.
19:21Nil.
19:22Yes!
19:23Nil!
19:24You said you can't do it!
19:27Anyone else?
19:30Alan's father.
19:31Alan's father.
19:32Not mine.
19:34Well, we thought he'd grow out of it.
19:36I mean, it's not illegal.
19:37It's not certifiable.
19:39It's just so bloody stupid.
19:42Of course, the situation came in reverse.
19:46My parents didn't influence me at all.
19:48I was lucky to survive like I did.
19:51Like I have.
19:53Like I have did.
19:55I didn't get much guidance from them.
19:57But fortunately, I had a lively, independent mind.
19:59And soon developed an interest in anoraks.
20:02Which has seen me in anoraks ever since.
20:05Unless, of course, I'm sitting down around the bath.
20:07When I take it off and wash it.
20:09Separately, like.
20:11Of course, my parents don't see much of me anymore.
20:14Apart from my head and my hands.
20:16And I think that's enough.
20:18Since I've left home, a lot of good things have happened.
20:21Unfortunately, none of them have happened to me.
20:24Or if they did, I missed them.
20:26I wasn't there, I was looking at a photograph or something.
20:29So anyway, to answer your question.
20:31Would be difficult.
20:33As I can't remember it.
20:35The tragedy in this case was the legacy left to Callum's father.
20:40It was quite normal till Callum arrived.
20:43I just thought I turned out like I have.
20:46Like I did.
20:49Like I did have.
20:51Anyway, I don't see much of Callum anymore.
20:54Because we don't have that much in common now.
20:57Apart from maybe anoraks.
21:00And photographs.
21:02And laughing at shopping trolleys.
21:05Painting food yellow.
21:09Hopping backwards up the stairs.
21:12Talking to motorbikes.
21:13I know.
21:14But this situation is the exception rather than the rule.
21:17The parental legacy phenomenon is as common as ever.
21:22Hi.
21:23I think that today we should deal with your attitude to sex.
21:25Well, I'd like more of it.
21:28Now, don't block me.
21:29Let me ask you again.
21:30What do you feel about sex?
21:31Well, as I said, I do feel I'd like more of it.
21:32Which comes from an insecurity as my parents never displayed any physical affection towards each other or indeed me.
21:41I remained a single example of a moment of love in an otherwise loveless marriage.
21:42Of course, I understood the divisive implications of trying to elicit affection from one parent or another as this would merely give them the ammunition to endow me with affection as a way of damaging each other.
21:55So, you see, an antithesis to what I saw in my parents, I think that sex should be open and loving and should not be used as a weapon or a toy merely to be withdrawn as a form of punishment.
22:15But I've been left with a need with more sex from my partner than is humanly possible.
22:19Of course, infidelity is not the answer, so I'd drive as much relief as I can through the open and frank discussion of any problems I may have and the sharing of any insecurities I have with my partner and your good self.
22:30Hmm.
22:32Would you like your money back?
22:36Lovely and reluctant man.
22:41George, look.
22:42What?
22:43We've got another television.
22:44That's not television.
22:45That's a thief.
22:46Right, your hands up.
22:47Come on, man.
22:48Right, out of there.
22:49Out, out.
22:50Two, three.
22:51Right, it's gone.
22:52Get on to the room service.
22:53Have them send up a two-place officer, a judge, a jury and a probationary man just in case.
22:57Right, explain yourself.
22:58I was just fixing your shower.
23:00Well, fix it then.
23:03I thought your shower was broken, not your television.
23:09That's the television.
23:12Of course.
23:14We've been so ready.
23:15Yes.
23:18We've got a careful consideration.
23:19We've decided on a course of leniency here.
23:22You can, in every respect, you're free.
23:25Free to go, if you'd like to.
23:28Okay.
23:29Thank you very much.
23:31Cheerio.
23:32Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
23:37Glass of TV.
23:38Where's the shower?
23:39I just came up to the TV, where's the shower?
23:40There's a fire.
23:41There's a fire.
23:42That's a fire.
23:43There's a fire!
23:44All the face.
23:45So you'll probably get on the TV as well.
23:46The TV, where's the shower?
23:48You can't listen.
24:18You can't listen.
24:25Found it!
24:27Good Lord, you've put it on weight.
24:30Shall I?
24:31Yes, yes, fire away.
24:33All right.
24:39Fire away.
24:42It's a bit hot.
24:44Take your jacket off.
24:46Oh, right there, yes.
24:49Yeah, that's one.
24:52Always expect the unexpected.
24:59Because when the unexpected happens, you are in fact expecting it.
25:16They have taken the horses and fled.
25:26Yellow dogs.
25:29We must make chase.
25:44Your plan is correct, I think.
25:46We shall have to round up our posse.
25:51No.
25:52I'm sorry, will you?
25:54No.
25:55You must stay here and look after the ranch.
25:57You're speaking too loud.
25:59What do you take me for, Juanito?
26:02Hey, woman.
26:03I'm speaking to you what?
26:04Loud.
26:05Of course not, Francisco.
26:07You are required here in case of surprise attack.
26:10All I'm saying is, don't go over the top.
26:14If you don't let me come, I will shoot you.
26:17Oh, well, that's fine too.
26:18Come here, Mr. Bloody Realism.
26:20Now, come on, Francisco.
26:21Take it easy.
26:22Would you like to see my commendation from Leicester Drama College?
26:25I mean it, Juanito.
26:27One more step.
26:28And you're dead.
26:29I guess I'd be very interested to see that forgery again.
26:31OK.
26:32Enough is enough, Crip.
26:34Give me the gun or you're finished.
26:36Forgery?
26:37You saw it.
26:38Just apologise, right?
26:39Or face the consequences.
26:41Lovely, man.
26:42You don't often see a Welsh film on the television these days.
26:44Just a ticket, man.
26:45Get off now, man.
26:46What are you?
26:47I'll meet you there, bandido.
26:49Take it back, you ham.
26:51Listen, I've been debbing seven years longer than you.
26:54Oh, yeah?
26:55I suppose that's why I get all the coffee commercial voice-overs
26:58and you seem to spend a considerable amount of time
27:01recording station announcements for British Rail.
27:03Oh, my.
27:04That is a fire from a skoof, you little shit.
27:06I mean, who?
27:08Who's the best?
27:09Me!
27:10Who's the painter?
27:12Who is the operator?
27:13Moi, moi, moi.
27:18Sacre bilet.
27:21Yes, if you tell the lie, then you must go to the police.
27:25But if you rocked a lady and said you didn't, then the police would come and get you, and you would be hiding in a cupboard, and they would knock on the door, and they would say, Tarzan in the jungle, swinging on the tree.
27:37I am the policeman, and you can't catch me.
27:40And they would smash your house down.
27:42They would, yes, and then you would be hiding in a little cupboard, and they would kick it down.
27:47Yes, and then you would be in there, and they would be wearing big black boots made out of tires for a lawyer.
27:54And they would have ironing boards on them.
27:57Yes, and gas makes you sleepy, and they would pick you up by your ear, and you would swing like a little monkey in a banana tree.
28:04And then they would put you on the motorbike, and they would take you all the way to the police station, where the police go to bed.
28:12In hammocks.
28:13Yes, and they would ask you the questions, and there would be two of them.
28:17And one of them would say, what is once two is two?
28:21And then the other one, he would be wearing normal clothes, like the vicar, and he would ask you to speak Chinese.
28:32And if you didn't know it, then they would put you in prison, and they would chop your hair off, and make you wear pyjamas, and eat liver, and mud.
28:41And you'd have to live in a hamster's cage.
28:45But if you didn't be naughty, then the policeman might pick you up to see the palace, yes.
28:51And he would be wearing a pointy hat, like a bosom.
28:55And he would have a button on top, like a little kitten's nose.
28:59And if you press it, it makes a noise, and it goes, na-na, na-na, na-na.
29:04And then four policemen come out of a big truck, and they do spanky with the fat walking stick.
29:09And then they do laugh, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, and they say what time it is.
29:16And some policemen are ladies, but they are not really ladies, but they do dress in ladies' clothes.
29:24And they can pretend to the fiefs.
29:26And when the fiefs are not looking, then they smoke a pipe.
29:29And some policemen do ride on horses, and these are the ones what the queen likes.
29:38And some policemen do have special masks and dustbin lids for when they play football.
29:45And if the team didn't score enough goals, then they bang the dustbin tops, and they say,
29:50We won the war in 1964.
29:53And the team, what didn't win, die.
29:57That is what the police do. It is. It's true.
30:05In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost,
30:13I hereby baptise thee, Alistair, Graham, Banks, Cohen, Wilson, Stiles, Charlton, open records,
30:23Jack, close records, Moore, Captain, Ball, Hunt, Charlton, open brackets, Robert, close brackets,
30:32Jeff, they think it's all over, it is now,
30:35Peters, plus Sir Alf, and that git who dresses up in the top hat and flag,
30:43and my personal favourite sportsman of all time,
30:48I'm... me. Daddy, that's my boy, Davidson.
30:54Did you?
30:58Now, before I pass sentence, do you have anything to say in your defence?
31:02I beg your pardon?
31:15What theme tune is this?
31:17That's the thing to Z-Cars, isn't it?
31:25Excuse me, that's never Z-Cars.
31:28What is it, then?
31:29One of those space things.
31:31What, Blake's seven?
31:32No, no, no, the other one.
31:34What, it's Star Trek?
31:35No, no, no, that's not Star Trek. This is Star Trek.
31:38That's Z-Cars. This is Star Trek.
32:01Is it?
32:03No, no, no, no, this is it, this is it.
32:05No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
32:35No, match of the day.
32:42Test match special!
32:48All right, man, just checking.
32:53You're in business!
32:59Come on, come on, let's go on an issue seat.
33:01What about this one?
33:03Suits on.
33:05If you've got problems, and you're not getting on in life.
33:13If things aren't working out, and your life is filled with trouble and strife.
33:20If you're getting left behind, and you find yourself standing at the end of life's cue.
33:27There's one little important thing to do.
33:31Start wearing a suit, and people will start to take you more seriously.
33:46Start wearing a suit, hold your head up high in a jacket, shirt and tie.
33:59Start wearing a suit, and kiss your problems goodbye.
34:04You could be like Prince Charles, or any MP, and wander around importantly.
34:13You could have the thrill of a lifetime, pretending to be part of the business community.
34:20Community, if everybody dressed up right, the world would be a much more pleasanter sight.
34:27Our problems would be solved, and everything would be all right.
34:33Famic could be averted, if everybody dressed up right.
34:41You'll never see a charter's favor, and bald in a potato blind.
34:46All you people from California, we always try to warn ya.
34:53That if you didn't dress smart, then your state would fall apart.
34:57So, stop wearing a suit.
35:01Civil wars would end, and people would stop firing shells.
35:06Start wearing a suit, cause they'd be taking crime in there.
35:11Love battles, start wearing a suit.
35:13A lot of color, would end all worldwide, small cop wearing a suit.
35:17Which frozen dance would save the environment, and stop wearing a suit.
35:21Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
35:43Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
35:51Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh...
35:53His men pay him.
35:53Never kosten wear или?
35:56He has a debtor stamp for the cab.
36:07Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
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