Skip to playerSkip to main contentSkip to footer
Carl Lorraine
  • 4 months ago
THANKS FOR WATCHING 😁

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00George!
00:02Country!
00:04My son Aaron can't read or write.
00:08I'm so ashamed.
00:10Aaron does so poorly in school,
00:12I decided to keep him at home.
00:14And now, when people ask about him,
00:16I just tell them he died.
00:20Aaron, all he wants to do
00:22is play those violent video games
00:24all day long.
00:26Honey, honey, you need
00:28to read something.
00:30Mommy, what?
00:32Please, please, read!
00:34No, wait!
00:36Look how much fun I've had.
00:38Lots of people are dying in this book.
00:40Aaron, please, read, please!
00:42Isn't there something interesting
00:44and entertaining that can help Aaron
00:46learn how to read?
00:48There sure is. It's the new
00:50Hooked on Phonics, King Grammar, and the Alphabet Castle
00:52video game. Wow, this looks fun.
00:54Your child will be learning
00:56the rudiments of reading when he loads in the CD.
00:58Okay, come on, let's read, Aaron.
01:00And select from one of the many exciting verb heroes.
01:06Your knight then attacks the Alphabet Castle
01:08as head of the Predicate for sin.
01:10His mission, to banquish the now-villagers.
01:12Watch your child's reading skills,
01:24vocabulary, and confidence increase.
01:26You won't mind your child playing with the
01:28Hooked on Phonics video game 24 hours a day.
01:34Thank you, Hooked on Phonics.
01:36Aaron loves words now.
01:38Just last night, he asked me
01:40if he could annihilate his dinner.
01:42I still don't let Aaron go outside, though.
01:46Maybe it wasn't the reading that mother
01:48had been in the first place.
01:50No.
01:52Aaron!
01:54While Hooked on Phonics, King Grammar, and the Alphabet
01:56Castle video game, it's an all-out war
01:58Let's go!
02:00Take out!
02:02It's MAG TV!
02:06With Frank Carlienzo!
02:10Yes.
02:11Mo Collins!
02:16Bobby Lee!
02:20Michael McDonald!
02:22Barry Spears
02:27Stephanie Weir
02:31Deborah Wilson
02:35Featuring Ike Berenholz
02:38Josh Myers
02:39Christina Moore
02:41Ron Peterson
02:43And Paul Vogt
02:45Guest starring Jamie Kennedy and Nelly
02:52It's the new Dating Game and here's your host
02:56Chuck
02:58Wollary
02:58Hi everybody, thank you
03:04Hi everybody
03:06Welcome to the Dating Game, the show where a beautiful
03:08single woman gets to pick a date from three eligible
03:10bachelors and here
03:12they are
03:13Bachelor number one
03:18is a swimming instructor from the Glendale
03:20area, he enjoys swimming
03:21Here's Chris Hampton
03:23Bachelor number two is a dictator
03:31who burst onto the world stage in 1990
03:34with his invasion of Kuwait
03:35He enjoys collecting lethal weapons
03:37and no, I'm not talking about Danny Glover and Mel Gibson
03:40His turn offs include
03:42Phony People, Hugh Grant Movies
03:44and the United States of America
03:45Please welcome Saddam Hussein
03:47Oh hey, bachelor number three is a communist dictator
03:57He's looking for a lady to share his passion for soft rock and torture
04:01Here's North Korea's Kim Jong Il
04:04And now let's meet the lucky bachelorette who'll get to choose one of these guys
04:15She's a manicurist who's studying to be a hairstylist
04:18Please welcome Kirsten Taylor
04:20Kirsten
04:20Just beautiful
04:27Okay, Kirsten has her questions prepared
04:29So go ahead
04:30Okay
04:31Hi, bachelor number one
04:34If I were an ice cream cone
04:37What would you do to me?
04:40Well first I'd lick you with my hot tongue until you melted
04:43And then I'd drink you
04:46Ooh
04:49I like being a drink
04:52Alright
04:53Number two
04:55Same question
04:56Ice cream is a western dessert
04:58I would spit on you
05:00Death to America
05:01Wow, kinky
05:05Bachelor number three
05:09Describe the ideal date
05:12Well first I would send my henchman
05:18To pick you up against your will
05:20And then you would be thrown into a van
05:22With previously kidnapped Japanese teenagers
05:25Because I'm a romantic
05:26Ooh
05:27Fancy and romantic
05:32Number one
05:34Describe your perfect moment
05:37May 1998
05:39I caught the perfect wave
05:40Woo
05:44Waves
05:45Alright
05:46Number two
05:49Your perfect moment
05:51That's an easy one
05:55August 1995
05:56My two sons-in-laws attempted to flee the country
05:59Upon their return I had them executed
06:01I stamped on all insubordination
06:03Death to America
06:05Even my insubordination?
06:10No
06:11Your candor is infuriating
06:13If it were not for this thin wall between us
06:15I would decapitate you
06:17Mmm
06:18Nice
06:19Decapitation
06:20Number three
06:24Same question
06:25Describe your perfect moment
06:27This is dating myself
06:31But in 1983
06:32I was behind this bomb attack in Rangoon
06:35That killed several members of the South Korean cabinet
06:38Good times
06:40Sounds like a party
06:46Alright
06:47This question is for all three bachelors
06:51What's your most embarrassing moment?
06:54Oh wow
06:54This one time I was judging a thong contest in South Beach
06:58And I got heat stroke
06:59And I fainted
07:01Same here
07:05At my ninth wedding
07:12I chopped off my father-in-law's head
07:14And wore it on my hand like a puppet
07:16Mmm
07:19Love me some puppets
07:21Okay
07:25Kirsten
07:25You have time for one last question
07:27Okay
07:27If you resembled any celebrity
07:31Who would it be?
07:33Mmm
07:34Alright
07:35Alright
07:35Now
07:36I don't see this personally
07:38But I get it
07:39All the time
07:41George Clooney
07:42George Clooney
07:46George Clooney?
07:50Okay
07:53Time's up
07:54Kirsten
07:54Are you ready to make your pick?
07:56Well
07:56I've already had George Clooney
07:58So I don't
08:01I don't really want to pick any of them
08:03Well okay
08:03That means that I win by default
08:05That's right Chuck
08:08You two lovers
08:09Are going to have all
08:10Spence paid trip
08:11To Jack Bullery's dressing room
08:13Featuring a love seat
08:14From Broy Hill
08:15And plenty of paper towels
08:17For cleanup
08:17Okay
08:20That's all the time
08:21We have everybody
08:22Let's blow the big
08:23Danny Gantt piss
08:24Mwah
08:25Hi
08:30Welcome to Trading Spaces
08:31Oh my god
08:32Oh
08:33Read your homeowner's manual
08:36Holiday decorations
08:37Need to be taken down
08:38In a timely fashion
08:40Yo
08:40I like the all white
08:42Hot top strap
08:42With the golf bottom
08:43Big boy
08:44You saw my bottom
08:45Look dirty
08:45That's why I got em
08:46Big boy
08:47Hi
08:53Welcome to Trading Spaces
08:55The show where two neighbors
08:57Swap homes
08:58And they each get a thousand dollars
08:59To redecorate one room
09:01In each other's place
09:02I'm Paige Davis
09:04And today we are coming to you from
09:06Hawthorne, California
09:08Where air traffic controller
09:10Paul Berg
09:11Hi
09:12We'll swap keys
09:14With his upstairs neighbor
09:15Meter maid
09:16Benefa Latifah
09:17Halifah
09:17Sharifah Jackson
09:18It's Benefa
09:24Black
09:25Oh, you got it right
09:27Time to swap keys
09:30And get to work
09:31Okay
09:31I'm sorry
09:37I'm sorry
09:38I'm sorry
09:39That's just my pepper spray
09:40See
09:40I had to get it
09:42Cause some bitch
09:43Stole my Gucci nose ring
09:44And if I catch you
09:47LaJuan
09:47Do you know what
09:47I'ma do to you
09:48I'ma crack your ass
09:50In half
09:50I'ma
09:51Paul went to work
09:53With designer
09:53Frank Bielek
09:54In Benefa's condo
09:55So Paul
09:57How do you want
09:58To change this space?
10:00All I care about
10:01Is soundproofing the floor
10:02I have not had
10:03A decent night's sleep
10:04Since I moved in here
10:05I swear
10:05I don't know
10:06What's going on up here
10:07But she just clumps
10:08Around this apartment
10:09All the time
10:09Talking on the phone
10:10At the top of her voice
10:11She listens to
10:12Rhythm Nation
10:13You know that album
10:14It's like what
10:14A 12 year old album
10:1524 hours a day
10:16On a loop
10:17You know I would sell
10:18This place but I can't
10:19Because I'm going
10:19Through a horrible
10:20Custody battle
10:20Please you've got
10:22To help me
10:22Please look at
10:23The dark circles
10:23Under my eyes
10:24They have not
10:24Gone away
10:25I mean God only knows
10:26What that woman
10:27Has on her feet
10:28How do you feel
10:28About chintz?
10:32Meanwhile
10:32Benefa is in
10:34Paul's condo
10:34Strategizing with
10:35Designer Vern Yip
10:36So I'm going to
10:37Pick up this TV
10:38You move the crates?
10:39Hey hey hey
10:40You move the
10:40What picture?
10:41Hold on
10:42Hot thing
10:43What are you talking to?
10:44Hey Benefa
10:45Oh really?
10:46So that's how it is?
10:48Huh?
10:49You think the sister
10:50Got a break?
10:50Her back
10:51For the white man
10:52I'm not white
10:53Don't throw that
10:54In my face
10:54Let me tell you
10:56Something little
10:56Miss Scarlet
10:57The war is over
10:59And look at me
10:59I ain't picking
11:00No more
11:01Ca-ing
11:03Time's up
11:24Let's see how Paul and Benefa
11:26React to their new room
11:28Okay Paul
11:39You can open your eyes now
11:41Oh my god
11:43It looks like a
11:44Freaking whorehouse
11:45Okay Benefa
11:56Open your eyes
11:58Oh my god
12:06Oh my god
12:07Oh my god
12:08Oh my god
12:10Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
12:36Does she love it or hate it?
12:38I can't tell, but I'm going home to my wife.
12:42Your wife?
12:50Attention, ladies. Check this out.
12:52Hundreds of real college guys show you their boy boobs
12:54in an all-new Boys Gone Wild.
12:56Jam-packed with hot young dudes, unbuttoned and out of control.
13:01We caught them in Cancun.
13:03Mardi Gras.
13:06Frat parties.
13:09Or just hanging around, letting it all hang out.
13:16It's not sold in stores and can't be shown on TV.
13:20But call now and get the all-new Boys Gone Wild
13:23for the unbelievably low price of $9.99.
13:28Act now and get Spring Break Thawnt Fest absolutely clean.
13:32Even we can't believe what these freaky fellas did.
13:38Then we handed them the cameras and you'll see it all.
13:41Raw, real, and uncut.
13:44Satisfaction guaranteed.
13:59Operators are standing by.
14:00Order now.
14:01Boys Gone Wild.
14:03Geez, what a rack on that guy.
14:10Yay!
14:15Good evening, I'm Connie Tong.
14:17So, Joe Millionaire, let's get serious.
14:20I think you're really hot.
14:20Thanks, me too.
14:23Thanks, me too.
14:26Good evening, I'm Connie Tong.
14:42If you change the channel right now,
14:44there's a great rerun of Growing Pains on Nick at Night.
14:48But if your remote isn't working
14:50or you're too lazy to get up,
14:52my guests tonight are The Bachelorette
14:54and Joe Millionaire.
15:02Welcome.
15:03Most critics feel your shows are sexist and offensive.
15:07I don't think so.
15:08Me either.
15:08Good, neither do I.
15:14So, Joe Millionaire, let's get serious.
15:17I think you're really hot.
15:19Thanks, me too.
15:22And isn't it weird that your last name is Millionaire
15:24and you are a millionaire?
15:27Well, actually, it isn't and I'm not.
15:31What?
15:31Huh?
15:33What?
15:34Nothing.
15:37Okay, good.
15:38Trista, you have 25 handsome hunks
15:40vying for your attention.
15:42I can't even get Maury to look at me
15:44unless my cousin Suki and I are taking a bath together.
15:50Trista, how do you feel?
15:51Well, Connie, I'm secure with who I am.
15:54I am very confident.
15:56And I think, ultimately,
15:57that's what men are looking for.
16:01What is?
16:05What is what?
16:06Huh?
16:07I'm sorry.
16:08Good, moving on.
16:09Joe.
16:11I'm Evan.
16:12Who?
16:12Evan.
16:13Huh?
16:14What?
16:15Evan.
16:15I like your teeth.
16:19Thanks.
16:20Joe, do you think I'm pretty?
16:23Yeah, I go for the sweet and sour pork every now and then.
16:28I don't.
16:29I hate Asian men.
16:31They're clean, but loud, and they're boop-boop.
16:37Trista, how about you?
16:38What?
16:39You know.
16:41Oh, do I like Asians?
16:43No, do you think I'm pretty?
16:44Well, uh, yeah, I, yeah.
16:49Well, uh, that's all the questions I have.
16:56Do you have any questions for me?
16:59No.
16:59Uh, I have one.
17:01How the hell do you call this a news program
17:04when you obviously know nothing about your subject?
17:07Exactly.
17:08What?
17:11Right?
17:12What are you talking about?
17:16No, what?
17:16What are you saying?
17:17And thank you for joining us for another
17:19hard-hitting edition of Connie Chung Tonight.
17:22Your screen will now go blank for 27 minutes
17:25after that Lou Dobbs money line.
17:28Goodbye.
17:28Goodbye.
17:38Everyone, this is Mr. Ortega.
17:42He's been experiencing some intestinal pain,
17:44so he's here for a colonoscopy.
17:47I'm sure he won't mind if a few of our third-year med students
17:49watch the procedure, right, Mr. Ortega?
17:51Well, actually, doctor.
17:52Oh, I'm not a doctor.
17:53I'm a nurse.
17:55Oh, but here comes your doctor right now,
17:56and she's one of the best, Dr. Kylie Johnson.
17:58Thanks.
18:04Thanks so much, but they're not real.
18:08Oh, I'm sorry I'm late.
18:11I was playing the most awesome game of laser tag
18:14for my birthday.
18:15Happy birthday to me.
18:17Happy birthday.
18:20Oh, my gosh.
18:22Did I make out with you at a wedding?
18:24That's not all we did.
18:26Oh, please.
18:28I must have been so hammered to make out with you.
18:32I got so wasted.
18:34I am still hungover.
18:36Ow.
18:38Just kidding.
18:40Hi, Mr. Ortega.
18:43Are you ready for your pap smear?
18:45What?
18:48I'm kidding with you.
18:50I'm Dr. Kylie, and as you know,
18:52a colonoscopy is a simple but very important procedure
18:55where we stick a camera up your butt and take pictures.
18:59Check the box if you want double prints.
19:01Okay, you've been fully anesthetized, and so have I.
19:10So, like Pink says, let's get this party started.
19:15Hi, I'm Kylie.
19:17I like long walks in the park, techno-funking guys with tattoos.
19:21Okay, Robin, to the Batcave.
19:26Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.
19:29All right, now, Mr. Ortega, this might feel a little strange to you.
19:33Or maybe not.
19:33You're gay, right?
19:34No.
19:36I owe you $5.
19:37Okay, ready?
19:42Lights, camera, and action.
19:44Take one.
19:49Ew!
19:52What channel is this, Fox?
19:54It must be because it's crappy.
19:59Oh, so, Kylie, we're starting with the large intestine.
20:02Yes, that is correct, and then we're making a left at the old church
20:05and a right at Taco Bell.
20:08Excuse me, this is very uncomfortable, and I really don't find this funny.
20:12Oh, I'm sorry.
20:14I changed the channel, but it's Becker, and that's worse.
20:19No, seriously, I'm looking for polyps, any sign of distress,
20:23a souvenir stand, you know, something to remember the trip by.
20:27Oh, no, roll up the windows, kids.
20:30We're gonna pass a farm.
20:33Ew!
20:37Oh, Mr. Ortega, I'm kidding you.
20:42Everything looks really good.
20:45Oh, except...
20:46Except what?
20:47Oh, my gosh.
20:48Did you ever swallow a penny?
20:50No.
20:51Did you ever shove one up your...
20:52No!
20:53Why?
20:54Is there one up there?
20:55No, but there is a tiny top hat and a thimble.
20:58Were you playing Dirty Monopoly?
21:00Doctor!
21:02Please, okay, just settle down, relax.
21:04I'm just trying to get you to relax.
21:06You are doing a great job.
21:08I know it's uncomfortable, but yes, I'm leaving your descending colon,
21:11and I'm entering your transverse colon.
21:13This is great.
21:14Absolutely normal.
21:16Oh, thank God.
21:17I've really been stressed about it.
21:19Oh, I could tell.
21:20Your butt was clenched so tight, I could sharpen a pencil in it.
21:23Wouldn't it be weird if you could really start with a pencil?
21:28Dr. Kylie Johnson?
21:29Oh, yes.
21:30I have a warrant here for your arrest.
21:32Oh, my gosh.
21:33Why?
21:34What did I do?
21:35I'm afraid you're guilty of breaking hearts and having a birthday today.
21:40Woo!
21:43I can't dance with just you, Ron!
21:45You know it!
21:46Oh, my gosh.
21:46Go, Kylie!
21:47Go, Kylie!
21:48Go, Kylie!
21:49Go, Kylie!
21:50Go, Kylie!
21:51Go, Kylie!
21:52Go, Kylie!
21:52Excuse me!
21:54Excuse me!
21:56Could someone please take this camera out of my ass?
22:01Great idea!
22:02Group picture!
22:05Booyah!
22:09Everybody say butt cheeks!
22:11Butt cheeks!
22:19Dumb face!
22:21Dumb face!
22:21Dumb face!
22:22Ooh!
22:23I got you saying the stupidest put-down ever, Baldac!
22:26That's gonna lead off my Baldac blooper reel!
22:29Woo-hoo!
22:34Honey, do you understand this family circus cartoon?
22:37Because I sure don't.
22:39Okay, there's a kid, and he's in the kitchen, and the caption says,
22:42Mommy, I want a sandwich.
22:48No, that's it.
22:49It's a one-panel cartoon.
22:53It's really kind of infuriating, you know?
22:54And you give me the number of the paper, because I'm gonna call them, and I want to tell them
22:58what kind of cartoon...
22:59Speaking of irritating cartoon characters, there's butt lutz sniffing around in our yard
23:04again.
23:04What is that ferret up to now?
23:10Where's he going?
23:11He's probably just trying to figure out where to put his 15th TV.
23:15He's got his video camera.
23:16Dana, get my camera.
23:16Get my camera.
23:17Go, go, go, go, go.
23:18Lutz, what the hell do you think you're doing?
23:20And if you come one step closer to that fence, I swear to God, I will sue you for trespassing,
23:24you jackass.
23:26I told you I was going to the Sunside Terrace Homeowners Association if you didn't take down
23:31all your holiday crap.
23:32Now, Christmas was over two months ago, you homo.
23:36Take it down.
23:37I got it all right here on tape.
23:39Good.
23:40You know what?
23:40When you take your tape down to the Homeowners Association, you can take mine of that
23:44satellite dish you got hanging off your pissy-yella house.
23:48Why not?
23:49Is she in there trying to learn those TV remotes?
23:51I heard that, Dana.
23:53And for your information, we got a universal remote over a year ago.
23:58Well, look who's up before noon.
23:59What, you run out of vodka, Maddie?
24:02Read your homeowner's manual, Baldack.
24:05Holiday decorations need to be taken down in a timely fashion.
24:09Move out of the way, because I'm going to get a good shot of that space station hanging
24:12off the side of your house, making everybody in the neighborhood sterile so you and your
24:16booze-bagged wife can watch ESPN ice dancing on Channel 8 or whatever, you big dumb face.
24:26You got me.
24:28Dumb face.
24:29Ooh, I got you saying the stupidest put-down ever, Baldack.
24:33That's going to leave off my Baldack blooper reel.
24:36Woo-hee!
24:38And for your information, I have one glass of white wine in the evening.
24:43Oh, yeah?
24:43What does that glass look like, Maddie?
24:45A trash can?
24:48Please, you guys, just stop fighting already.
24:50Hey, get back in that house, Jeffrey.
24:52Yeah, get back in the house, Jeffrey, before the satellite monster dish fries your nerd sperm.
24:58At least he's got nerd sperm.
25:02That's better than having two empty pig-pong balls.
25:06Dana.
25:07I didn't tell him.
25:08I did not tell him.
25:12You ought to be more careful with what you put in your trash, Baldack.
25:15Those are my test results.
25:16You know what?
25:17That is a criminal act stealing private property.
25:20You give me those back.
25:20All right?
25:21You hold on to this camera.
25:22You record everything.
25:22I'm coming over, and I'm going to get those tests with them all back.
25:25Give me those test results right there.
25:28Get away.
25:28Get me those test results.
25:30Get away from me, Baldack.
25:30Give me those test results.
25:31I want those test results on my spine.
25:34Get out.
25:35You know what?
25:36Fine.
25:36You ain't going to give it to me.
25:37I'm going to yank down your satellite dish.
25:39What's that going on down?
25:40That cost me $5,000.
25:42All right.
25:43I'm not letting go.
25:46Oh.
25:50I got it.
25:52Look at that.
25:52Look at that.
25:53I got it.
25:53I got it.
25:53I got it.
25:54I got it.
25:54I got it.
25:54Stop it right now.
25:59All right?
26:01Look, I'm inside trying to watch SpongeBob SquarePants, and you guys are screwing up.
26:06All right.
26:06Now, here's what I'm going to do.
26:08I'm going to go inside, and I'm going to have myself a go-gurt.
26:11By the time I come back out here, you better fix this satellite dish.
26:15All right?
26:16You better take down all these crappy Christmas decorations, or I'm going to start taking out
26:20kneecaps.
26:21You feel me?
26:24You want some of this, Mom?
26:25You think I'm kidding?
26:26No!
26:26Maybe if I, you know, pushed, and you got on the roof, we could...
26:40We could...
26:41We could...
26:43We could...
26:43We could...
26:45I'm stompin' in my arms, no more.
26:47Big boy, I'm stompin' in my arms, no more.
26:49I like the all-white hot-top strap with the gum bottom.
26:53Big boy, you saw my bottom, look dirty, that's why I got...
26:56Derek Coulson, come on down!
27:04Jolfea Dill-Johnson, come on down!
27:16And Lorraine Swanson, come on down!
27:26Eventually, you'll be the next contestant on The Paris du Grey!
27:36And here's the star of our show, Bob Barker!
27:44Hello and welcome to America's longest-running game show.
27:51Thank goodness for shut-ins and welfare moms.
27:53Welcome back, Rod Roddy, we missed you.
27:55Thanks, Bob.
27:57Of all the guys at that rest stop, who knew he was the sheriff's son?
28:04Just kidding, Bob.
28:05I knew he was the sheriff's son.
28:08Of course you did, Rod Roddy.
28:10And away we go!
28:13Ah, them are cute.
28:27What?
28:27Say, how do you get him to jiggle like that?
28:31What do you jiggle?
28:31Eat a lot of Jell-O when you're a girl?
28:33Sorry.
28:34Huh?
28:34Sorry.
28:35You didn't get any of that going.
28:37Huh?
28:37Oh, Crapes, I go from speed lock around the lake.
28:41I just swing mine right over the shoulder and waggle!
28:44All right, let's just take a look at our first item up for bid.
28:48From Sears Craftsman, it's the big blower, leaf blower.
28:55With a powerful, lightweight design, it'll blow you away.
29:00And it could be yours if the price is right.
29:04Why don't you start the bidding there, soldier?
29:12Oh, um, Bob, I'm not a soldier.
29:15I just have a sexual fetish for uniforms.
29:18Um, I bet, uh, $400.
29:22$400 it is.
29:24Zylfia, that's a beautiful name.
29:27Thank you, Bob.
29:27I was named after an antibiotic.
29:30I, I bid.
29:31Okay, help me out, yo.
29:32What's that bid?
29:33Hey, Bob, Bob, Bob, okay?
29:43I bid $58,000.
29:48Unique strategy.
29:50Lorraine, Lorraine, what are you doing?
29:53Stop it, you can't go over there.
29:54Well, just hold your spade-neutered horses, Bob.
29:57I gotta, ah, I gotta have at this Hummer.
30:01Let's see what she's got.
30:03Let's see what she's got.
30:06Raise.
30:07No.
30:10What?
30:11No.
30:20No.
30:20No.
30:21Sorry about that.
30:21Oh, God.
30:51Lorraine, I need you to get back to contestants' row so we can get your bid.
30:54Well, I can tell you my bid right here, Bob.
30:57That bute's $159.47, not a penny more, not a penny less.
31:03All right, fine, we'll see.
31:04Yeah.
31:05And the actual retail price is...
31:10It's $159.47, just like you said.
31:13All right, congratulations to Lorraine.
31:15She won.
31:16Ha, ha, ha, ha.
31:21Ah, it's your tan.
31:26Say, you know, with your dark skin and your white hair, Bob, you kind of look like a negative.
31:33You know, I tried some of that tan in a can, Bob.
31:36I ended up looking like an Oompa Loompa.
31:41Ah, those sumbitches scared the crap out of me.
31:44That's fascinating, Lorraine.
31:55We're just going to get you...
31:56Say, what movie was that, anyway?
31:57I don't know, and I don't care.
31:59Wonka's Willie?
32:00I don't care.
32:01Willie Wonka.
32:03Willie Wonka.
32:04All right, let's just play the game.
32:07This one's called Price Tag Switcheroo.
32:10Do you know how to play?
32:10You'll get 45 seconds on the clock.
32:12Go ahead, start the clock, please, right price, switcheroo, switcheroo.
32:16Ha, ha, ha, ha.
32:19What am I going to win, though, Bob?
32:20Huh?
32:21All right, Rod Roddy, tell the old lady what she's playing for.
32:25It's his and her scooters.
32:30You'll be the talk of a town with these pretties from Aprila.
32:35Retail price, $2,798.
32:39$2,799.
32:40Lorraine, switch those price tags.
32:43Bring up the clock and go!
32:44Unbelievable!
33:08Unbelievable!
33:09That's a new Price is Right record, everybody.
33:15Yeah, well, I didn't come here to lose, Bob.
33:21All right, we'll catch you on the flip side.
33:27We'll be back with more fun and excitement
33:29on The Price is Right.
33:39This is for my number one.
33:42Me, me, me, me, me, me.
33:48This was hard to do.
33:50I want to be a star, but I didn't have a clue.
33:52I'd like to take over Will Smith's place.
33:55But I couldn't with my belly and my fat face.
33:58So I took down some fast creatine.
34:01HGH, some Xenadrine.
34:03Uh, Winstrom, it made me paranoid.
34:06So I shot my ass with a horse steroid.
34:08Now I got my body swollen thick.
34:11Even though it could be shrinking my...
34:13When I think about the films I did
34:15And the way that I was looking like
34:17I need to burn up all those crappy flicks
34:20That y'all just make me sick.
34:23Baby, look at me
34:25Cause I'm bursting at the sea
34:28I'm gonna love me better
34:32When I watch myself flicks
34:36I just wanna go and kiss my pants
34:39I'm gonna love me better
34:42It's a brand new back
34:45Some brand new traps
34:46A brand new chest
34:48A brand new pack
34:49And I don't mind the side effects
34:51Like my teeth soft and I can't have sex
34:54Plus I'm going hoops with a big long mane
34:57So you can brush me and feed me grain
34:59It's just so amazing I'm bleeding and covered
35:02And now I've got a real rock hard butt
35:04You can love me better
35:05I'm looking high
35:07Plus I can gallop and jump and try
35:09Uh, you can love me better, baby
35:12Uh, I can love you better, baby
35:19Man, I really turned me on
35:21The only thing Mori ever gave me was a filthy Gomez
35:32And he was looking at Suki the whole time
35:35He even stayed in the couch
35:40Joe, do you think I'm pretty?
35:44Yeah, I
35:45Do you think I'm sexy?
35:47I go for the sweet and sour pork every now and then
35:49Oh!
35:49Oh!
35:49Oh!
35:50Oh!
35:50Oh!
35:51Oh!
35:52Oh!
35:52Oh!
35:53Oh!
35:54Oh!
35:55Oh!
35:56Oh!
35:57Oh!
35:58Oh!
35:59Oh!
36:00Oh!
36:01Oh!
36:02Oh!
36:03Oh!
36:04Oh!
36:05Oh!
36:06Oh!
36:07Oh!
36:08Oh!
36:09Oh!
36:19Oh!
Be the first to comment
Add your comment