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00:00Live from the Carnation gazebo at Disney World, it's the Lance Bass Show with your host, NSYNC's very own, Lance Bass.
00:20Hi. Okay, hey, thanks. Welcome to the Lance Bass Show. Here's my opening comedy joke.
00:30Okay, Bazooka Joe walks up to this really tall guy and says, how's the weather up there?
00:37And the really tall guy spits on him and says, it's raining.
00:45I think that's, I think that's really mean.
00:49I'm in a new movie. Here it is.
00:53Not the whole thing, just a, just a little, just a small part.
01:00You saw me on a train and you searched the whole city for me? For how long?
01:08Long.
01:10I'll never let you go.
01:13Me neither.
01:14All right. Plenty more where that came from.
01:27Now it's time to welcome our super dope guests.
01:31They're in a new super dope movie.
01:34Everybody say what up to Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker.
01:38All right.
01:52Yeah.
01:53Yeah.
01:54Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker.
01:57Welcome to the Lance Bass Show.
02:00Yeah, thank good B to here now, right now.
02:04Yeah, man, and I'm the number one funny man in the world.
02:08Don't, um, you're what?
02:11I said I'm the number one funny man in the world. Get the coin out of yours, boy.
02:15I have no idea what he just said.
02:18True dat.
02:20All right.
02:21Jackie, do you do all your own stunts?
02:25Yeah, I break ass in 14 places.
02:28He make a rap, I break ass.
02:31Yeah, man, it's funny when you break stuff, too, Jackie, man. It's funny when you break stuff, man.
02:34I can't understand. I can't understand.
02:38Okay.
02:39What's the secret to your success?
02:43Well, first of all, I'm in the new Michael Jackson video.
02:44Y'all get a chance to be okay.
02:46I can actually understand more of what he's saying.
02:54Okay.
02:55Do you guys have a part of your movie to show?
02:59I'll take bloopers, comical.
03:01Yeah, man. Funny I'll take bloopers.
03:04Scene 94, take six.
03:07Action.
03:09Cool, man.
03:10Bust the door down. Quit.
03:11Ready or not, I hear come now.
03:15Oh, my back.
03:20My back broke.
03:22Jackie, it's funny when you break, man.
03:25You.
03:26You.
03:26Oh, you're fucking, you're fucking, you're fucking, you're fucking, you're fucking.
03:33I will eat your ass, you're fucking.
03:35Oh, so funny.
03:46Oh, man, man, man.
03:47Oh, wow, this is gonna be a funny movie.
03:50Wow, that was a funny blooper.
03:52Hey, I've got a blooper for my new movie.
03:55Let's take a look at the blooper for my new movie.
03:59Scene 7, take 498.
04:03Action.
04:04Just go.
04:06And don't look back.
04:07Man, man, what is so funny about that?
04:19I don't know.
04:20I'm not quite sure.
04:21What's a blooper?
04:29How much time do we have left?
04:31What?
04:3248 minutes.
04:36Okay, well, I don't, I don't know what to do with 48 minutes.
04:40But usually when I don't know what else to do, I dance.
04:45So let's bust a move, guys.
04:47Wait, dancing.
04:47Ain't nobody said nothing about no 48 minutes worth of dance, okay?
04:50Shut up, fool.
04:51You're lucky to be in movie business, buddy.
04:53Shake booty.
04:53I have to shake my booty.
04:54I'm not.
04:55It's MADtv.
04:59Starring.
05:02Horsting.
05:05Mo Collins.
05:10Andrew Daly.
05:14Michael McDonald.
05:18Will Sassum.
05:20Aries Spears
05:26Stephanie Weird
05:30Debra Wilson
05:34Featuring Catherine Fiore
05:37And Bobby Lee
05:39Guest starring Alien Antifor
05:50Hi, are there any movies starting right now?
05:59You're in luck
05:59We have A.I., Planet of the Apes, American Pie 2, Rush Hour 2, Jurassic Park 3, The Fast and the Furious, America's Sweethearts, Princess Diaries, Rat Race, The Others, Ghost of Mars, and Shrek
06:10Wow, that's quite a selection
06:15What do you recommend?
06:17That's easy, Shrek
06:18It's an animated tale about an ogre with a hideous outward appearance who's looking for love, and you're pretty
06:26I really, I don't really like animated movies
06:33Uh, is American Pie 2 funny?
06:36Um, it's not so much funny as it is awful
06:39It really, really is
06:41It's got a lot of dirt and smut and sex in it
06:43I really don't like it at all
06:44Very, very dirty film
06:45Very awful and dirty film
06:47Oh, everyone I know says it's funny
06:49Okay, well, I don't give an intercourse what other people say
06:52With the exception of Eugene Levy, who is God
06:57American Pie 2 sucked
06:59I just said sucked
07:01You look sad
07:08Uh, yeah, uh, my boyfriend just dumped me
07:11Oh, I'm so sorry
07:14Me too
07:17So, you know, I really do need a good laugh, so what do you recommend?
07:21Hmm, how about Shrek?
07:23It's got comedy in the form of Eddie Murphy as an animated donkey with a ghetto-inspired savvy
07:28Or as I like to say, he's a real smartass
07:31That's funny
07:34Thanks, I just made it up
07:35You said you needed a good laugh, so I thought I better deliver for the lady
07:39You're really very pretty
07:43You're really, really happy
07:44You're very pretty
07:44Thanks
07:45Oh, you don't need to thank me, because you know how, like Nelly Furtado says
07:49It's true
07:50Um, you know what, I think I'll just see Rush Hour 2
07:57I don't recommend Rush Hour 2
07:59Why not?
08:01Well, because Chris Tucker has a very, very annoying voice
08:04He's a very, one of the most annoying voices I've ever heard in show business
08:07Has a tone that just goes right into the ear
08:10It's a very, very annoying tone that he has
08:12I get it, get it, got it
08:14Okay
08:14Okay
08:15How about AI?
08:16Hmm, AI, which stands for absolutely idiotic
08:19Oh, what about Rat Race?
08:22I thought you said you needed a good laugh
08:23Well, it's a comedy
08:25No, it's not
08:28All right, then how about Planet of the Apes?
08:32Okay, now Planet of the Apes, that's a very, very good film
08:34Finally
08:35Of course, I'm talking about the original Planet of the Apes
08:38Anyone who sees the new Planet of the Apes
08:41Better bring a condom with them
08:42Because they're going to get screwed
08:43Hey, but you know what would be a great movie for you?
08:52Shrek
08:52Yes
08:53I know, you like that movie
08:55I know, because it's got a princess
08:57Who doesn't realize that the man of her dreams
08:59Is right underneath her nose
09:01And all she has to do is open up her eyes
09:03And then she'll see that he has the heart of a lover
09:07Okay
09:10What do you say?
09:12Meme's Rusty, right?
09:14Uh-huh
09:14Okay
09:15I think I know what you're getting at, Rusty
09:18Uh-huh
09:19Ooh
09:19And, um, I'm just not interested in seeing Shrek, if you know what I mean
09:24Uh-huh
09:25Yeah
09:26Sorry
09:26Well, I don't need to be sorry
09:29I mean, you know, reference is reference for the film
09:31I don't know
09:31It's just, you know, it's no skin off my teeth
09:33I don't care
09:34Oh, good
09:34Okay, good, great
09:36Hey, you know what?
09:37I think I'm just going to see the others
09:38Yeah
09:38Okay
09:39It's a very good film
09:40You'll like that
09:41It's very, very scary
09:42And there's a surprise twist ending
09:43Oh, good
09:44By the way, the surprise twist ending is that
09:47Nicole Kidman is dead and so are her children
09:48And they're all ghosts
09:49Enjoy
09:49Okay, see, that's why I have this glass right here
09:57That's why I have this glass right here
09:59That's why I have this glass right here
09:59That's why I have this glass right here
10:01That's why I have this glass right here
10:01All right
10:01Evening, folks
10:06I'm Jesse Hill
10:08And a lot of attention's been paid to my announcement to retire
10:13But I'm here to talk about something else
10:16You see, like my recently retired colleague, Bob Dole
10:21I, too, have had a personal challenge with erectile dysfunction
10:26But unlike that liberal son-of-a-bitch Dole
10:30And his lesbo-feminazi wife
10:33Cut! Cut!
10:36Whatever seems to be the matter
10:38Was my smile not warm enough?
10:41No, no, no
10:42Your smile was fine
10:43Uh, I'm just not sure that the script says anything about Mrs. Dole being a lesbian
10:48Oh, fair enough
10:50Fair enough
10:52I didn't even realize I was saying it
10:54Can I try it again?
10:57Absolutely
10:58And we're rolling
10:59Action
11:01Evening, folks
11:04I'm Jesse Helms
11:05And a lot of attention's been paid to my announcement to retire
11:10But what we need to pay attention to
11:13Is all of them dirty beaner babies
11:15Sucking on the welfare
11:17Can I make another little boo-boo?
11:22Okay, why don't you just try not to go off the script so much, okay?
11:26It's, uh, offensive
11:27Oh, fair enough
11:29Fair enough
11:31Okay
11:32You know, with all these lights on
11:34Old Jesse here is sweating like a homo on judgment day
11:37Goodbye, Terry
11:38I want to come give Senator Helms a powder
11:40Whoa, whoa, whoa
11:42What kind of powder are you talking about?
11:45I don't take cocaine
11:47Nines
11:48I'm just gonna powder your face
11:49Oh, fair enough
11:51Fair enough
11:53I'm sorry for the misunderstanding
11:55You see, I just figured you was a drug dealer
11:59On account of you being black
12:00You know what?
12:02I don't need the job that badly
12:03I'm sorry, Judy
12:04Wow
12:05Wow
12:07Look at that round behind
12:09She is a natural boy athlete
12:12Okay, Senator Helms
12:14You know, you might have been able to get away with that talk before
12:16But this is Hollywood
12:17We are a little more sensitive around here
12:20On account of all the fairies
12:22Oh, good God
12:23Oh, now, young miss
12:24Don't you use the Lord's name in vain
12:27He don't like that
12:28Oh, but he does like all the jokes about gays and blacks
12:31Sure it
12:32Do you know any?
12:34No
12:35I'm sure you don't
12:36No
12:36Because Jerry Falwell told me an AIDS limerick the other day
12:40Just had me in stitches
12:42There once was a sissy from Soho
12:45You know what?
12:45We need to just do this before I walk off
12:48Don't forget the script, all right?
12:50Just talk about the product, Viagra
12:53Oh, fair enough
12:55This is it
12:55This is your last chance
12:57Oh, my
12:59And...
13:01Action
13:02Hey, folks
13:04Jesse Helms for Viagra
13:06Now, you know I'd sooner die than poke a c*** or a c***
13:11But if I had to, Viagra would make sure I'd show up for the job ready to go
13:17Good enough
13:19That's lunch
13:21Oh, terrific
13:22How must I make for this, anyway?
13:25Oh, my
13:26I am all skinny now
13:36Goodbye, Lane Bryant
13:38And hello, TJ Maxx
13:39You're watching the BET Network
13:47Providing quality, intelligent television for the African-American community
13:51Brought to you by the Red Lobster
13:53Where else can you get 99 shrimp for $6?
13:56And Trojan Magnum Extra Large Comments
13:59Cause all that peasy crap aside, brother
14:01We know it's true
14:03And now, live from Philadelphia, it's Reality Check
14:08With your hostesses, Tova McQueen and Belma Button
14:11Hey, y'all
14:16I'm Tova McQueen and this is Reality Check
14:19The show where you leave your delusions at the door
14:21Sit your a** on down
14:23Open up wide for a big slice of truth
14:25With a sigh of wisdom
14:26Lord, you know what?
14:28I seem to be missing my partner today
14:30Actually, I ain't talked to Belma all summer
14:33Now, see
14:34BET was late with my check again
14:37So, long story short
14:38My phone got cut off
14:40And then I shot my husband
14:41I don't know why that makes me laugh
14:44Anyway
14:45Let's start off our new season
14:47With a very special guest
14:49Mr. Denzel Washington
14:50Lord, I just can't believe
14:56Belma's gonna miss our special guest
14:58Hold on, girl
14:59Here I am
15:00What's up, girl?
15:07Belma, look at you
15:09You ain't no bigger than one of my nipples
15:11Thank you, girl
15:12Thank you
15:13You know what?
15:13I am all skinny now
15:15Goodbye, Lane Bryant
15:16And hello, TJ Maxx
15:18Girl, girl
15:18Look at how much fat I lost
15:20Now, this here
15:21Is the fat that used to be on my body
15:24Woo, girly girl
15:26You did lose a lot of weight
15:27Oh, I'm not done
15:28That's just my ass
15:29Say hello, girl
15:32To one of my chinny-chin-chins
15:34Ooh, Belma
15:36Now, you've been talking about losing weight
15:38Since your eighth heart attack
15:39Girl, sit on down
15:40And tell me how you did it all in one summer
15:42Okay
15:43By drinking eight glasses of water a day
15:45Took the stairs
15:46Not the elevator
15:47And 17 hours of liposuction
15:50Plus, I had my stomach stapled
15:52Girl, you must have cleaned out
15:55To every office depot
15:56To get them staples
15:57Ooh, you ain't never lied
15:59But come on, baby doll
16:01Pumpkinhead
16:01Come on
16:02You know that waist
16:02Gonna come back faster
16:04Than little Kim's herpes
16:05Uh-uh
16:05Uh-uh
16:06See, because
16:08Girl, sister here
16:09Is on the subway diet
16:10Oh, that's where you eat
16:12All them subway sandwiches
16:13No, no, no, no
16:14That's why I eat all the food
16:15Left by people on the subway
16:17Look, I brought you dinner
16:19This is a half-eaten pretzel
16:20With a piece of gum stuck to it
16:22Look, honey
16:23I'ma tell you what I told Rick James
16:25I ain't putting that mess in my mouth
16:28Girl, I'm happy with my deep-fried ham
16:32Rolled in almonds
16:33And covered in a hollandaise sauce
16:35No, no, but
16:36Tova, Tova, Tova, Tova
16:37Baby, do you realize
16:38How many grams of saturated fatter in that?
16:40Not to mention
16:41Ah!
16:44Back to putting this up, baby
16:46Because if I wanted to hear
16:47A boring sermon
16:47I'd sit on my ass at home
16:49And watch a Spike Lee movie
16:51You know?
16:52Now, come on
16:53Let's just bring out
16:54Our special guest
16:55Mr. Denzel Washington
16:57Ahem
16:57Um, Tova
16:59You didn't get the message, baby
17:01What you talking about, Willis?
17:04I-I canceled Denzel
17:05What?
17:06Yeah
17:06I decided to bring on
17:07A very special guest
17:08Somebody who really makes a difference
17:10So I want y'all to give
17:11A round of applause
17:12To my new best friend
17:13And personal fitness trainer
17:14Miss Bambi Whitehead, y'all
17:16My girl
17:19My girl
17:22Say hello, Tova
17:23Hi, Tova
17:25I am so pleased to meet you
17:27Mm-hmm
17:27Here, I'm expecting this
17:29Big, beautiful, handsome black man
17:31And I end up with a
17:32Frail, creepy, little white woman
17:33What is this?
17:34The Michael Jackson concert?
17:36Now, now, now
17:37Let's just all calm down
17:38Take a seat
17:39Now, Tova
17:41Bambi's here to talk to you
17:43About your weight problem
17:45Weight problem?
17:47Sister soldier
17:48I ain't got no weight problem
17:49I'm the same weight
17:50Since high school
17:51And I'm a BBBW
17:53Big, beautiful, black woman
17:55If you ask me
18:01More like a big bloated
18:02Beach whale, Shamu
18:03What did you do to my Belma?
18:07Well, I found her
18:08Underneath all that fat
18:09And now it's your turn
18:12I have convinced Belma here
18:14To give you
18:15A reality check
18:16It's for your own good
18:17Notorious P.I.G
18:19Three
18:22Two
18:23One
18:24Do you
18:25Tova McQueen
18:26You're so fat
18:27When you bend over
18:28We lose an hour of daylight
18:29Go
18:30Girl, you so fat
18:32Goodyear make your draws
18:33Go
18:33You're so fat
18:35You fart El Nino
18:36Go
18:37Girl, you're so fat
18:40You don't even have periods
18:41You have exclamation points
18:42And you know something else
18:45Thank y'all
18:48What you need to do
18:50Is start barfing up
18:50At least lunch and dinner
18:51And had him ribs
18:52Taken out
18:53Well, let me tell you something
18:54Belma Eugene Buttons
18:55The only ribs
18:56I'm ever gonna take out
18:57Are Tony Romo's
18:59And I'm through
19:00Well, you know something
19:03Miss Chubbs
19:03I'm not through
19:04Oh, I'm hungry
19:07I see my minister
19:09Belma, wake up
19:11No, no, no
19:11It's okay
19:12It's okay
19:12She just needs something to eat
19:13Have a tofu cube
19:14Bitch, you better move out the way
19:16Well, she needed some ham
19:18Snap
19:18Come on, girl
19:20Oh, that's the honeybee
19:22Oh, no, no, no
19:22No, Belma, don't eat that
19:23This is better
19:24Come on
19:24Oh, girl
19:25Girl, that ham
19:26Girl, move out the way
19:27Before I eat you
19:27Girl, that ham is so good
19:29I'll smack you with a TV
19:30And not even change the channel
19:31Ooh
19:32Belma is back, y'all
19:34That's right
19:35That's right
19:35That's right
19:37Ooh
19:37Girl, I know what
19:39Let's take up some of my fat
19:40And fry up some chicken
19:41Woo
19:41Oh, y'all shut up
19:45What about me?
19:48What about you?
19:50You better sit your ass down
19:51Or think about what we said
19:52Wearing Jennifer Lopez's ass
19:54On your chest
19:55This has been Reality Check
19:58And we are through
19:59Let's go
20:00Yeah, if you're angry
20:10You should use words
20:12Okay, fine
20:14Shut up
20:16Welcome back to Good Morning Phoenix
20:23We're here in the home
20:24Of Mr. and Mrs. Ronald Goddard
20:26Which is also, coincidentally
20:28The classroom for their daughter
20:30Seven-year-old child prodigy
20:32Karen Goddard
20:33Atahua
20:35Which means greetings in Maori
20:38Which is the native tongue
20:39Of the people indigenous to New Zealand
20:41It's also one of seven languages
20:44In which I'm fluent
20:45I'm currently a college sophomore equivalent
20:48And I've recently been accepted
20:50To the graduate programs
20:51At MIT, Princeton, and Dartmouth
20:53And all of that
20:55Thanks to the educated commitment
20:57Of my parents
20:58Thank you very much
20:59Sweetie
21:00All right
21:01So, first things first
21:02Why homeschooling?
21:04Well, we just felt
21:05That we were better equipped
21:06To handle the educational needs
21:09And the enormous capacity
21:10For learning of our daughter
21:11Karen
21:11The door's locked
21:14Looks like you
21:17Got somebody at your door there
21:18Oh, that's Dot
21:20Hi
21:20The door's locked
21:22Uh, it's one of the neighbor kids
21:24Anyway, as I was saying
21:25We remain committed
21:26To our daughter's education
21:27It's of the utmost importance
21:29To us
21:29We take it very, very seriously
21:31Well
21:34Hello there
21:35My swing set tipped over
21:38I think maybe
21:40I was swinging too high
21:41That's my twin sister Dot
21:43Are you okay?
21:44I was trapped
21:45Underneath my swing set
21:46I thought you said
21:50That Karen here
21:51Was an only child
21:52Uh, Dot, honey
21:53Why don't you go
21:54Play in your room?
21:55I can't, Mom
21:56Because my body
21:57Is still underneath
21:58The swing set
21:59I'm just Dot's spirit
22:02And I'm floating
22:04I'm floating around
22:05Then go towards the light, Dot
22:09Go towards the light
22:10Go ahead
22:11No, no
22:12Please
22:13Not at all
22:14Don't worry
22:14Dot truly has
22:16An enviable imagination
22:17No, you have the enviable
22:19Yes
22:20You have the enviable
22:21Yeah, you're right
22:21I do
22:22So, do you, uh
22:25Homeschool the two girls
22:26Together or separately?
22:27Oh, no
22:27Dot's not homeschooled
22:29Mom and Dad
22:29Send her to public school
22:30She likes it
22:32Dot attends
22:34Jorge Washington Elementary
22:35I used to go to school there
22:39I did
22:40But now that I'm a spirit
22:42I'm not allowed
22:43So me and God and Jesus
22:44Are gonna go to the movies instead
22:46All three of you
22:48Are gonna get punished
22:49If you don't sit down
22:50Even God and Jesus?
22:55Especially God and Jesus
22:56Uh, so
22:59What made you decide
23:00To educate your two girls differently?
23:03Well, our daughters
23:04Are clearly very different
23:05And therefore have
23:06Different educational needs
23:08And Dot likes cafeterias
23:10Everybody there
23:13Has to wear gloves
23:14It's the law
23:15I wish the whole world
23:17Was like that
23:18I see
23:28Well
23:29Mr. Goddard
23:30Uh
23:31Mr. Goddard
23:35I'm sorry
23:36Go ahead
23:37Great
23:37Uh, how do you respond
23:39To critics
23:40Who argue that
23:41Homeschooling
23:42Can impair a child's
23:43Social skills?
23:44I think that's nonsense
23:45We make sure that
23:46Karen socializes
23:47With other homeschooled girls
23:48And that enables us
23:49To keep track
23:50Of who her friends are
23:51My friend Hector Aguilar
23:53Gave me head lice
23:54He did
23:57I had a million bugs
23:59Living in my head
24:01They were all over my hair
24:03Weren't they?
24:04Do you remember?
24:04God
24:04My mother
24:06She had to put medicine
24:07On my head
24:08So that she could
24:09Kill them all
24:10And she thought she did
24:12And then my dad got it
24:15I gave him head lice
24:20He had to shave his head
24:22And his back
24:23Because he had them
24:24All running around
24:25It was the funniest thing
24:27You ever saw
24:28Because you had
24:28I don't know why
24:30She hit me on the half
24:33Miss Nesma says
24:36That you shouldn't hit
24:38Yet if you're angry
24:39You should use words
24:40Okay fine
24:42Shut up
24:44Could we get a look
24:47At what a typical day
24:48Of homeschooling is like
24:50How about it?
24:50Sure
24:51Okay great
24:51Just pretend that I'm not here
24:54Pretend that I'm a unicorn
24:56We'd like to start each school day
25:01With a balanced nutritious meal
25:04To ensure Karen's productivity
25:06What is that?
25:07And then we discuss
25:08The day's lesson plan
25:09That looks like food
25:10What inspires you today Karen?
25:14Well I thought maybe we'd pick up
25:15Where we left off last week
25:16And we could talk about
25:17The concealed paradoxes
25:18Of mathematics and physics
25:20Excellent
25:20I think that both fields
25:22Are very interesting
25:23I'm going to have
25:24Drop tight
25:24I'm going to have top
25:26Oh no
25:27Oh my gosh
25:30Dot are you okay?
25:31She's fine
25:32She's fine
25:32Go ahead
25:33Dad she fell
25:34Dot
25:35Is she okay?
25:37Karen
25:37Look at my arm
25:38Oh my gosh
25:41I think you separated
25:42The clavicle
25:43No
25:44Look
25:46I got a new scarf
25:47Don't touch it
25:49Don't touch it
25:50Don't touch it
25:51Don't touch it
25:52No no no
25:52Dad please
25:53Can I keep it
25:54I want to show my friends
25:54No
25:55No
25:56I'm taking her to the free clinic
25:57Dad you're a doctor
26:00She likes the free clinic
26:02Bye everybody
26:04Bye
26:05You're going to perform smooth criminal
26:21Boys and girls
26:22Please welcome
26:22Alien Ant Farm
26:24You guys
26:45You guys think you're so much better than me
26:48Because you're redoing my hit song smooth criminal
26:50Well I'm here to let you know that Michael Jackson is the king of pop
26:53Yeah
26:54And I'm going to let you know
26:56Everybody's talking about Michael Jackson's making a comeback
27:01How could I be making a comeback if I haven't gone anywhere
27:04So I'm here to show the Mad TV audience as well as the rest of the world
27:07That Michael Jackson still has it
27:09I got a little bit of arthritis in my hand
27:33Look you guys just play me off
27:37I'm going to go
27:39Where's my boys
27:40Where are my boys
27:40Help me off
27:41Alien Ant Farm
27:44As you came into the window
28:03Was the sound of a crescendo
28:05You came into a apartment
28:07With the blood stains on the carpet
28:09She was an evidable
28:11Did you see she was an evo
28:12So she ran into the bedroom
28:14She was shut down
28:15And we saw her do
28:16Are you okay
28:18You okay
28:19You okay
28:20Are you okay
28:22You okay
28:23You okay
28:23Are you okay
28:25You okay
28:26You okay
28:27Are you okay
28:29You okay
28:30You okay
28:31Are you okay
28:32Don't you tell us
28:33That you're okay
28:34I'm here to show my hippo
28:36Did you strike me
28:37Because you don't let me
28:39Give me to my apartment
28:40If my blessings
28:41I'm gonna call me
28:42I'm here to run into the bedroom
28:43You were shut down
28:44And we saw her do
28:45Are you okay
28:47You okay
28:48You okay
28:49I'm here to run into the bedroom
28:49You okay
28:50You okay
28:51You okay
28:52You okay
28:52You okay
28:52I need
28:53Are you okay
28:54You okay
28:55You okay
28:56I need
28:57You've been hit by
28:58You've been struck by
28:59A smooth criminal
29:00You okay
29:01You okay
29:01You okay
29:02You okay
29:17You okay, you okay, you okay, you okay, I need
29:22Are you okay, you okay, you okay, I need
29:26Are you okay, you okay, you okay, I need
29:29Are you okay, what's your tennis, what you're okay?
29:32I've been inside the window, getting stuck to me
29:35I'm going to see you already
29:36You don't want me, you don't want to see me
29:39When you call me, give me a minute from the bedroom
29:41You're a trucker, boy, show me
29:43Are you okay, are you okay, are you okay?
29:46Are you okay, yeah, you've been hit by
29:48You've been struck by
29:50A smooth operator
29:54A smooth operator
30:05Don't do that, you want that
30:07Don't do that, you want that
30:09Don't do that, you want that
30:11Don't do that, you want that
30:13Don't do that, you want that
30:15Don't do that, you want that
30:16Don't do that, you want that
30:18Don't do that, you want that
30:19Don't do that, you want that
30:20Are you okay, what's your tennis, are you okay?
30:23I'm going to stand up in the window, getting stuck to me
30:26I'm going to see you already
30:27I'm going to do a little party, like a good stage
30:29I'm going to call me
30:30Are you ready for the bedroom, who's my friend, who's your girl?
30:34Are you okay, are you okay, are you okay, Annie?
30:49You knocked me off of my feet now, baby
31:05sadece baby
31:07Vroom
31:18Vroom
31:19Vroom
31:22Vroom
31:24Vroom
31:25Vroom
31:28Hello, E. Welcome to the 7th I Know movie.
31:50In my last hit movie, The Sixth Day, I was cloned.
31:54I had to get back my stone identity.
31:55In the super big hit movie, The Recall, I was in the future and I had to get back my stone
32:02identity.
32:03And then in my super smash hit, Eraser, I had to help Vanessa Williams get back my stone
32:08identity.
32:09So now, my new movie is called Stone Identity, because stone identity movies make so much
32:15money at the box office.
32:16Actually, I'm calling it Stone Identity 3, because sequels make so much more, a lot of
32:21money.
32:22Hey, who are you?
32:28I'm your clone.
32:29Who are you?
32:30My clone.
32:31Then who am I?
32:32You're not you.
32:33Who are you if I'm not me?
32:34I'm you.
32:35I'm not me.
32:36Are you me or are you?
32:37You're me.
32:38Who's here?
32:39I'm you too.
32:41I'm not me.
32:42Now you know the secret.
32:43Now you must die.
32:44Which one are you?
32:46I'm you too.
32:47I'm not me.
32:48Because I'm not me.
32:50Now you know the secret.
32:52Now you must die.
32:53Which one are you?
32:55I'm not me.
32:56I'm not me.
32:57I'm not me.
32:58So I didn't die.
33:04Actually, me and my two clones joined forces, because it turns out I'm really an angel.
33:09Then, the CIA, they make a clone, but this one's a bad clone, because he's in cahoots
33:14with the devil.
33:15And then me and my clones go to fight the devil clone.
33:17But then it turns out that he's the real me, and I'm the clone.
33:20And then there's some scene in the museum.
33:24And then me and the CIA devil clone go to the lab where they make the clones.
33:28Then this happens.
33:29He's so cute.
33:34He's got your eyes.
33:35Of course he's got my eyes.
33:37He's my clone baby.
33:38I'm a clone baby.
33:45Oh, good, good, good, good.
33:46Good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, bad, good, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, good, bad, bad.
33:50I'm a clone baby.
33:51Yeah.
33:52He's got to grow up and save the world.
33:53He's your clone baby too.
33:54No, he's not my clone baby.
33:55Of course he is.
33:56You're the real me.
33:57So I'm trying to tell you.
33:58I'm not me.
33:59I'm you.
34:00I am.
34:01But I'm you.
34:02Oh, you're me.
34:03I don't like you.
34:05I'm a clone.
34:06So if you like clones, then go to the gods.
34:07clones then go see
34:09Stalin Identity 3
34:10and if you don't then go eat it
34:12Planet Hollywood then go see the movie
34:15afterwards anyway so it makes lots and lots
34:17of money
34:17thank you
34:31that's our show we trust
34:33you enjoyed it good night
34:37that means greetings in Mayuri which is
34:49the native tongue
34:50we start each school day with a balanced
35:00well-nutritioned
35:01so one more time
35:05well-balanced nutritious
35:07I made up a new word
35:09oh but okay
35:11oh I did I go I forgot the damn line again
35:13lord I can't take being fat
35:16sometime
35:16new Michael Jackson video
35:19I'm in the Michael Jackson video
35:20that's number one
35:21number two you know
35:22I'm number one in the mail
35:23we got Rush Hour 3 coming out
35:24y'all y'all
35:25what the fuck is
35:25Rush Hour 3 man
35:27Rush Hour 3 man
35:28right me and my man Jack
35:29it's the
35:30it's the
35:31we're the
35:31this is
35:32I can't understand
35:33how about AI
35:36well AI isn't your next line
35:39no
35:40then I don't know what it is
35:44oh actually it is
35:45and I'm a idiot
35:46man
35:48man
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