00:00Let's give it up for Lorena.
00:05Thank you guys! Give it up for yourselves. Look at this.
00:08It's a stone. How are you guys doing?
00:11Yeah, everybody shops at Warby Parker here. Okay.
00:14How are we? My name is Lorena. How are you guys doing?
00:18Yeah, round of applause if you've ever been confused for a white man.
00:22Anyone here ever been confused? No? So great, great, yep, great.
00:26You guys are doing great. Not the right crowd? Not the right crowd for this?
00:29I thought a lot of men worked here. Yeah, I used to have a buzz cut.
00:35Okay, I had a one on the side and a little up top, right?
00:38It was my neo-Nazi haircut. My neo-naz is what I called it.
00:42And I thought that is why I got called sir a lot, right?
00:45You have a similar situation.
00:47And so I thought that's why I was getting all these sirs.
00:51I look like, you know, short hair. Look, this is a very long crotch.
00:55I'll show you. These are real pants that I decided to buy.
00:58I saw this and I said, that's a me.
01:03And I bought them. Are you getting this? This is Facebook Live, right?
01:06Evan, you got this? Close-up? Great.
01:09Is the zipper up? Good. Sort of. Okay.
01:13And I thought that's why I was getting called sir, right?
01:15So I started to grow out my hair. I was like, I'm going to be a comedian.
01:18I'm going to be casting everything. I'm a mom.
01:20Started growing out my hair. Went through the pains of growing out my hair.
01:24You get it if you've ever had short hair.
01:26The awkward mullet that everyone thinks is an ironic statement.
01:32Right? Okay. The beanies in the summer. You don't want that.
01:38And I finally was able to put my hair up in a ponytail.
01:43And I thought, this is going to be the most feminine moment of my life.
01:47Okay? I am a woman. Okay?
01:51And I run to the bathroom. Put my ponytail.
01:54And I look in the mirror. And I was like, Thomas Jefferson's ghost?
02:01I am a man. I look like a man. Okay?
02:07Some people have resting bitch face. I have resting colonial man face.
02:13It's just Roanoke, Virginia up in here.
02:17It is just a whole thing.
02:19And so it sort of spurred this whole transition, if you would.
02:23I had a moment, all right, in the bathroom.
02:25My mom is knocking on the door.
02:28This is when I lived with my parents. Shabbat Shalom.
02:30If you live with your parents. I'm not Jewish.
02:33Anyway.
02:34My mom knocked on the door.
02:36And she's like, what are you doing in there?
02:37I was like, I'm having an epiphany.
02:39But I said it in Spanish.
02:40Which is just in Spanish.
02:43That's a Latin joke.
02:44Is anyone writing that down?
02:46Yeah. Good. Okay.
02:47Big Latin fan?
02:48All right. Reggaeton.
02:52This is making perfect sense.
02:53Okay.
02:54And so I started identifying as more androgynous.
02:57I was like, okay, this is like my thing.
02:58I'm a genderqueer.
02:59I'm a gender all encompassing.
03:01All right.
03:02She, they, he.
03:02I'll take them all.
03:03All right.
03:03I'm a six year old on my birthday.
03:05I'll take them all.
03:06But the problem is, you know, you're going through all this.
03:11And my number one recommendation is do not hang out with children.
03:14Because children will F your shiz right up.
03:18Okay.
03:18They know when you're going through something and they don't care to not say it.
03:25All right.
03:27All right.
03:28So one day I spoke at a career day at an elementary school.
03:33That was a joke.
03:36Oh, no one's hired me in years.
03:38And so I spoke at this elementary school and all these little kids were around.
03:43I was like, oh, they want me to be this female comic.
03:45But I'm like this lady man.
03:47I'm a Justin Bieber in the street and a Justin Bieber in the sheets.
03:50You know, I don't know what to do.
03:52And so these kids, they come up to me and they're like, what's the biggest challenge about being a comic?
03:57And I was like, well, being a female comedian is tough.
04:01And one kid raises her hand and she goes, wait a second.
04:05You're a girl.
04:06I thought you were a boy.
04:08Also, I thought you were a skateboarder.
04:13Which is fair feedback because this blazer was put on by accident.
04:18And so I said to her, I was like, well, you know, I'm like a multiple choice situation, right?
04:24Like A through E, whatever answer you want to put down.
04:26And then she said, and I'll never forget this.
04:29She said, multiple choice.
04:30Those are my favorite kind of tests.
04:32Thank you guys.
04:33That's my time.
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