- 2 days ago
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00:01So I want you to meet this guy I'm going out with tonight, okay?
00:07He's kind of a dork, but in a sweet way.
00:10He seems real, at least.
00:13And he's kind of rich, I think. Kind of.
00:16Of course, so was Kadeem, and that was a fucking waste of two years of my life.
00:24And you know what? I knew you never liked Kadeem.
00:29So I'm going to bring this guy home to meet you.
00:31And this time, I swear I will pay attention to what you think.
00:38Because I am one fucking hot shit bitch and he's fucking lucky to have me.
01:03Oh, it doesn't look good.
01:11Hey Tato! Come hang with me, okay?
01:15Come here.
01:21Who's my lover?
01:23Yes.
01:27Yes.
01:28Aren't you glad I rescued you?
01:30You better be fucking glad.
01:33Cost me 800 bucks in vet bills.
01:35At a time when things were particularly tight for mommy, I might add.
01:41One good thing about this guy tonight.
01:44He's got a big fat dick and he fucks like a jackhammer.
01:48He's a little boy.
01:48He's been married.
01:49He's been married by nothing now.
01:50Be careful.
01:53He's been married before ma'am's first ringing in my ears.
01:56He's bringing things, don't let me down.
02:00Food do want you to say, please don't let down.
02:03Lord forgive me for what I do.
02:06But if you want out, well it's up to you.
02:08Now don't let me down, your momma's going to help me move uptown.
02:47I hate the sins that made me born, and will ye come my best?
03:00David, I'm so glad to see you here.
03:02It's always nice when someone comes back to the fold.
03:05Oh, I've been going to church.
03:06I was just going to a different church.
03:08Really?
03:09Which one?
03:10St. Stephen's?
03:11In the Palisades?
03:12No St. Stephen's in West Hollywood.
03:16Well, I hope you always feel as welcome here as you did there.
03:21Thanks.
03:21You know, your father was a deacon here, and we still haven't replaced him.
03:24I think it would be good for this church to listen to a younger voice.
03:28If you're at all interested, I could submit your name to the bishop.
03:30Me?
03:31A deacon?
03:33David, that's wonderful.
03:34Your father would be so proud.
03:37Well, sure, I'd be honored to be considered.
03:40Ruth, how are you holding up?
03:42I'm doing okay, Father.
03:44Each day is just a little bit easier.
03:46That's what I love hearing.
03:48Well, what a small world.
03:50Do you go to this church?
03:51I just joined.
03:51I was raised Catholic, so I like the whole, you know, ritual part of it.
03:55Ooh, you smell good.
03:56What is that?
03:57Who are you?
03:59Oh, my God.
04:00I can't believe I never introduced myself.
04:02It seems like we've known each other forever.
04:03I'm Tracy Montrose Blair.
04:06Hi, I'm David.
04:07Fisher, I know.
04:07I know who you are.
04:09Okay, why?
04:10Because my Uncle Walt was buried at your funeral home.
04:14Old guy.
04:16Cancer.
04:16Had a tattoo of a roulette wheel on his back.
04:19Oh, yes.
04:20I have a tattoo.
04:22A butterfly.
04:24I think that you should know that I'm not really available.
04:27You have a girlfriend?
04:29Yes.
04:30Serious?
04:31We're engaged.
04:32Oh, well, good for you.
04:36Most men your age are so commitment-phobic it's pathetic.
04:40Yes, men are pigs.
04:41Or they're gay.
04:42Well, I'm certainly glad to find out you're not gay.
04:45I have to go.
04:46My mother's waiting.
04:46Okay.
04:50She seems nice.
04:52She seems nuts.
05:04Hello?
05:06Out here.
05:10Hey.
05:12This is the life, huh?
05:13Apparently.
05:15So often do mommy and daddy go away.
05:16Oh, constantly.
05:18They're very important people.
05:20Very important places to go.
05:22Lucky for them, I have absolutely nowhere to go.
05:26How are you?
05:26I'm good.
05:27It's chilly today.
05:28Aren't you cold?
05:29Nope.
05:32Jeez, it's like a hot tub in here.
05:34Mommy and daddy keep it this hot all the time, even in summer.
05:38They're very wasteful.
05:41That's just wrong.
05:54You're unlike any woman I've ever met.
05:57Good.
06:07You scare me a little.
06:08Why?
06:12I don't know.
06:13It's just, uh, so much I don't know about you.
06:19Me.
06:22I am an open book.
06:38I'm so glad you're bringing your friends home.
06:40You know, you haven't done that in years.
06:42What are you doing here?
06:44You said you'd be gone through the weekend.
06:45Yes.
06:46It's Sunday.
06:47It's the end of the weekend.
06:49Nate, these are my parents.
06:51Margaret and Bernard Chenoweth.
06:54Margaret and Bernard.
06:55This is Nate Fisher.
06:57The man I am having sex with.
07:00Hello.
07:02Brenda has told us absolutely nothing about you.
07:05Well, you know what?
07:06I'm not surprised.
07:07I'm not sure there's that much to tell.
07:09Oh, don't be so modest.
07:11Nate's studying for his funeral director's license.
07:13Well, Nate, you'll have to tell us all about that.
07:16Will you stay for lunch?
07:17At least a drink or two?
07:18Oh, I'd like to.
07:20But, uh, I really have to study.
07:26Well, then, you'll have to join us for dinner sometime.
07:30Uh, that sounds great.
07:35Great.
07:40Hey, Mrs. Fisher.
07:42I asked you here today so we could talk about your relationship with Claire.
07:49I told her it wasn't my idea.
07:50Uh, now, uh, Claire feels that, uh, being the youngest child,
07:54perhaps she might have, uh, missed out on a time when the family was happier.
07:59No.
07:59You said that.
08:01I told you, I don't think there was a time this family was ever happy.
08:03That is not true.
08:05There was lots of happiness.
08:06When the boys were young.
08:08When you were young, Claire.
08:10You were a very happy little girl, and you know it.
08:13Just because I was too young to realize what freaks we were.
08:16Why would you come into this man's office and tell him we were never happy?
08:18Uh, I don't know, because I grew up in a house that was usually filled with total strangers
08:21who were crying all the time.
08:23Oh, boo-hoo.
08:25I grew up in a two-room apartment over a barber shop,
08:27and I spent my teenage years taking care of my grandmother after one,
08:30and then both of her legs were amputated.
08:32Life's hard.
08:32Mrs. Fisher.
08:33You had a roof over your head.
08:34You didn't go hungry.
08:35Do you see?
08:35She gets up on this cross, and then there's just no talking to her, so...
08:38You did not have to go begging for food on the streets of Calcutta.
08:41What, because I wasn't dropped in a dumpster somewhere?
08:43I'm not supposed to want things to be better?
08:44This is good.
08:45This is, uh, good for you two to talk like this.
08:48These are, uh, obviously things you need to say.
08:52So what, we're just supposed to fight and get on each other's nerves?
08:55I prefer the not talking thing.
08:57I think you should try to have more of a dialogue.
09:00Make time for it.
09:01Schedule it.
09:02Remember, any relationship is work.
09:07Okay, excellent session.
09:10That's it?
09:11No, that's up to you, isn't it?
09:16He does this for, like, five different schools.
09:21She should look spectacular, you know, that's...
09:23That's the most important thing.
09:26We'll make sure that she looks her best.
09:30She was the real deal, you know.
09:32She was a star.
09:34And I can assure you, we will give her a funeral that befits the star that she was,
09:39and always will be.
09:40You know who she was.
09:42Absolutely.
09:43And I'm a big fan of hers.
09:50Hey, we're coming.
09:52Holy moly.
09:53Phil, they're really hard.
09:56Uh, no thanks.
09:57Like a rock.
09:58You see how they're all cockeyed?
10:01They got this low-cut flimsy thing they want her in, and they've said absolutely no brawl.
10:06Shit, I don't know what the heck I'm gonna do.
10:08I mean, I could, like, tape them together somehow.
10:11Uh, you know where this stuff goes?
10:12I put it in the wrong place, David.
10:13It'll bitch at me for a week.
10:14Top left above the purple stuff.
10:17Well, boys, this just might be our highest profit margin funeral this year.
10:20She's rich, huh?
10:21The guy who's paying for it is.
10:23Ah, she looks so familiar to me.
10:24She's an actress, Vivica St. John.
10:28Oh, my God, you're right.
10:30That's her?
10:31Apparently she was quite talented.
10:32She was a porno star.
10:35What?
10:35David, she was huge, like back in the mid to late 80s.
10:38Oh, come on, you never saw any of her videos?
10:39No, Nate, I missed those.
10:41Oh, man, this chick fucked a snake.
10:42This chick fucked, like, 30 guys at one time.
10:44I saw that.
10:45I saw that.
10:46My cousin Ramon showed me when I was, like, 12 on the diving board, okay?
10:49They were, like, wrapped around the pool.
10:51Did you see the one where the guy's riding this motorcycle that she's strapped to,
10:54so he's fucking her when he's riding around in circles?
10:57Nate, could I speak to you outside for a minute?
11:08Damn it, Nate.
11:09The woman on that table is just as deserving of dignity as anyone else we prepare.
11:14And Federico is an employee.
11:16It's up to you and me to set an example for him, all right?
11:19All right, I'm sorry.
11:20Show some respect.
11:21These are human lives we're dealing with here.
11:23These are not organic blackberries or granola in bulk.
11:26I said I'm sorry.
11:27I don't want you to be sorry.
11:29I want you to remember that what we do here is serious.
11:31Because it really sucks for me always having to be the spoil sport.
11:34Okay.
11:45Hello?
11:46Nate, Bernard Chenoweth.
11:48Hi.
11:48Margaret and I were wondering if you would join us for dinner tomorrow night.
11:52Tell them we're not going to take no for an answer.
11:54You hear that?
11:55Well, actually, I have a lot of studying to do for this exam.
11:58Nate.
12:00We'd really love to be able to get a sense of who you are,
12:02and I'm sure you're curious about us as well, right?
12:05Uh.
12:05Good.
12:06Shall we say seven-ish?
12:08Can I bring anything?
12:11Hello?
12:21Suck on that, you fucking fuck.
12:31Hi.
12:32There's this thing called knocking.
12:33It's, like, protected in the First Amendment.
12:36I rented some videos.
12:38I thought you and I could watch them tonight.
12:43Remember when you were in middle school,
12:44you and I used to go to the movies every Monday night?
12:47Remember how much fun we had?
12:49I remember seeing a lot of really bad movies.
12:55What'd you get?
12:58Runaway Bride and the Nutty Professor.
13:04Cool.
13:09Oz didn't make you a bitch.
13:12You were born one.
13:20It'll be good for business, too.
13:21Dad was a deacon there.
13:23It's a big congregation.
13:25People die.
13:27Families don't know where to go,
13:28and the church sends them our way.
13:30They know you're gay?
13:32I think Father Jack has a pretty good idea.
13:35Hmm.
13:35You think he likes you?
13:37Keith.
13:40Does this mean you're not going to be going to church with me anymore?
13:44Well, if they made me a deacon,
13:45I'd have to go there all the time.
13:46Yeah.
13:51I'm sorry.
13:52I know Sundays have sort of been our day.
13:58I think it's great.
14:00I really do.
14:01One of the things I love about you
14:03is the fact that your religion means so much to you.
14:07Besides, I think it could be kind of hot, you know?
14:09Dating a man with a cloth.
14:16I need you to do something for me.
14:18What is it, my son?
14:20You know the gay fireman and police officers club I belong to?
14:23Well, we're having a party in Laguna this weekend.
14:26I want you to be my date.
14:27Your date?
14:28Will I get a corsage?
14:29I want you to start meeting some of my friends, David.
14:33I'd like that.
14:35Oh.
14:36Forgive me, Father.
14:38For I am about to sin.
14:41Mm-hmm.
14:45Oh, Lord.
14:47The broccoli ones, ain't it?
14:49No, it's more like the...
14:55It's an entire movie about expelling gas.
14:58I think that's why people like it.
15:03I don't want to watch this.
15:04Good, because neither do I.
15:15Claire, look.
15:18I know you probably think I'm old and stupid.
15:21No, Mom, I don't.
15:23But I love you just as much as I ever did.
15:25And I'm worried about you, and I don't know how to help.
15:28I don't need help.
15:29Why is everyone acting like I'm in the Trench Coat Mafia?
15:32Stole a foot?
15:33A human foot.
15:35Okay, you want to know why?
15:36Because some guy who totally scammed me into having sex with him
15:39because I thought he actually cared about me,
15:41he told the entire school that I sucked his toes.
15:43And then when I confronted him about it,
15:45he showed entirely no remorse.
15:46So I saw Nate drop the foot on the floor.
15:48I just grabbed it just to get back at that asshole, okay?
15:50It wasn't premeditated.
15:51I'm not Jeffrey Dahmer.
15:52I don't get off on hacked-up body parts.
15:54You're having sex.
15:57No, I'm sorry.
15:59I cannot have this conversation with you.
16:00And I'm really sorry,
16:01but I don't think we're ever going to have
16:03one of these, like, touchy-feely mother-daughter relationships
16:05like you see on TV and in the movies.
16:06Because you know what?
16:07They don't exist!
16:17Here's our guest,
16:18and he brought us a bottle of Louis-Jean-Dopinot Noir.
16:231997, no less.
16:24Okay.
16:25A man who knows his wine.
16:27Why, I'm liking you more and more, Nate.
16:29Well, I worked at a food co-op in Seattle for a long time.
16:32Learned a little bit.
16:33A co-op?
16:34So there's a little hippie in there, huh?
16:35That makes sense.
16:37Brenda would find that attractive.
16:39She likes to think of herself as being wildly counter-cultural.
16:43But I think she's actually just jealous of the fact
16:45that Bern and I really were hippies.
16:47Briefly.
16:48Can I offer you a drink?
16:50Sure.
16:50Do you have any beer?
16:51No.
16:52We have vodka, scotch, bourbon.
16:55I'll have a little bourbon.
16:57Manly, but not elitist.
16:58Just her type.
17:00Down girl.
17:03So where is Brenda?
17:06Brenda?
17:07Oh, Brenda's not coming tonight.
17:13Really?
17:14Well, she felt, and I really have to agree with her,
17:17that we'd have a much better chance of getting to know each other
17:20if she weren't here.
17:21You know, she does tend to take center stage, so to speak.
17:25Huh.
17:26Huh.
17:26Well, I kind of wish somebody thought to tell me about this.
17:30Oh, I'm sorry.
17:30I assumed she did.
17:40There you are.
17:42David was raised in this church.
17:43He was christened and confirmed here.
17:45He served as an altar boy.
17:47And he was president of the youth ministry in high school.
17:51How old are you, David?
17:52I'm 31.
17:54What do you do for a living?
17:56I'm a funeral director.
17:58Ah.
17:58His father served as a deacon for over a decade.
18:00He just recently passed away.
18:03So, you see this as a sort of passing the torch?
18:08No, sir.
18:08I see it as a chance to serve God.
18:11Well, I'm glad to hear you say that.
18:14Because that's what it is.
18:16Being a deacon is more than just having access to the church mailing list
18:20and passing out your business cards after Mass.
18:25Sir, I won't deny that I run a business providing service to people in times of need,
18:30but I would never exploit my relationship to the church for marketing purposes, frankly.
18:35I would consider that to be a pretty grave sin.
18:38No pun intended.
18:42St. Bartholomew was an old church.
18:45A conservative church.
18:47A church that doesn't need to have its boat rocked.
18:49Which is precisely why I feel David is a good candidate.
18:52How many men his age have values as strong as his?
18:55I think he would be an excellent role model.
18:59Are you married?
19:00No, sir.
19:01I was engaged, briefly.
19:08Is there anything else you'd like to tell me about yourself before I consider this?
19:13No, sir.
19:17Is there anything specific about me that you'd like to ask?
19:20No.
19:26I'll let you know my decision in a few days.
19:33You impressed him.
19:34You think?
19:35Yes.
19:37Oh, by the way, one of our parishioners recently lost her father to liver cancer, Sharon Murdoch.
19:42I gave her your name.
19:43You may be getting a call.
19:50Again, with the not knocking.
19:51Pack some things.
19:52We're going to San Bernardino.
19:53What?
19:54We're spending the night at my cousin Hannah's.
19:56Mom, I'm doing homework.
19:58Well, stop.
20:00I have school tomorrow.
20:02I'll write a note.
20:07You know, it's been such a long time since Brenda's wanted us to meet any of the men in her
20:11life.
20:11What was that last one?
20:13Chiropractor?
20:13Oh, he was a rolfer.
20:15He was an idiot.
20:16Well, to be perfectly honest, I'm not sure Brenda ever meant for us to meet.
20:19I don't think she really expected you guys to come on that day.
20:21Oh, Nate.
20:23Where Brenda's concerned, there are no coincidences.
20:28You think she planned all this?
20:30Of course.
20:31She's a master manipulator.
20:33I mean, I love her dearly.
20:35But you really ought to know what you're getting into.
20:37Now, would you like another bourbon?
20:39Uh, no thanks.
20:44Can I ask you guys something?
20:45As long as it doesn't involve asking us for money.
20:50Oh, no, it doesn't.
20:52Does the name Nathaniel have any significance to you?
20:59Well, sure.
21:01Nathaniel and Isabella.
21:09Brenda adored these books as a little girl.
21:11She could read by the time she was three.
21:15What are they about?
21:16Two orphans who had adventures.
21:19They ran away from an orphanage.
21:21There was a malevolent nurse who was always hunting them down.
21:24But they always managed to outsmart her.
21:27Typical infantile wish fulfillment.
21:32I've never even heard of them.
21:33They're British.
21:34Quite dark.
21:34People die in them all the time.
21:36When Brenda's brother was born, we expected serious displacement anxiety from her.
21:40But there was none.
21:42She would sit next to his crib and read him these stories for hours.
21:45She was what then, burnt for?
21:47Fine at most.
21:50It's all in the book.
21:52This book?
21:57You mean she didn't tell you about that either?
22:04I feel terrible.
22:06I'm sorry I snapped at Grandma.
22:09Yeah, huh?
22:09That was a pretty freaky Friday moment we had back there.
22:12I just went ahead and invited her.
22:16Ruthie, I'm so glad you called.
22:18Ginny and I would never allow ourselves this kind of food unless it were a really special occasion.
22:24We're definitely going to have to do an extra spinning class this week.
22:27Tomorrow morning?
22:28Who's teaching?
22:29Derek.
22:30Oh, I am so there.
22:33Mom and I have the hugest crush on this spinning instructor at the Y.
22:37He is hot, hot, hot.
22:41So, Claire, have you thought about college?
22:45Yeah.
22:45Um, I'd love to go to, like, NYU or Columbia, but I don't know if I can ever get in,
22:51so.
22:52Well, there's some great schools in L.A.
22:55Well, yeah, but why would you want to go to school in the same town you grew up in?
22:59I'd go to Cal State right here in San Bernardino.
23:02Wow, whatever rocks your boat.
23:04Claire.
23:05Hey, I love it.
23:08By living at home, I'm saving a ton of money for grad school.
23:10I'm not stuck in some crappy dorm where everyone's smoking pot and playing loud music all the time.
23:16And I don't have to call campus police every time I want to walk home from the library so that
23:20I don't get raped.
23:23I'd like to stay close to my mom.
23:24That translates into I get to do her laundry.
23:27Oh, that's not true.
23:29I love my mom, and I'm not ashamed of it.
23:31Thank you, honey.
23:32I love you, too.
23:38Okay, um, anybody want more?
23:50So, how was it?
23:51Oh, it was quite informative.
23:53I know what Nathaniel means now.
23:54I know you have an IQ of 185.
23:55I know you had a book written about you.
23:57Here, I signed it for you.
24:01Why don't you just tell me about this?
24:03People always change toward me after they read it.
24:06I was just trying to make the fun part last.
24:08Oh, God.
24:09So you're kind of scarily brilliant.
24:11I can handle that.
24:12What I can't handle is the way you keep mind-fucking me for your own personal entertainment.
24:16That is really starting to piss me off.
24:17Well, I'm sorry I'm not some well-behaved little nothing that never challenges you,
24:21but if that's what you're looking for, you might as well just leave right now.
24:25Oh, so what?
24:26You trying to drive me away?
24:27Oh, yeah, Nate.
24:28I'm trying to drive you away.
24:35It was my mother's idea that I not be there, which is fine by me.
24:40I don't really enjoy their company.
24:43She said it was your idea.
24:45Yeah, she would.
24:47She probably believes that.
24:48She's out of her fucking mind.
24:49You could have warned me what I was walking into.
24:52He wouldn't have gone.
24:54I just wanted to get it all out of the way.
24:59Them, the book, everything.
25:00Yeah, well, I felt like a fucking lab rat over there.
25:03Yeah, that's what they do.
25:06I'm six years old.
25:08I score through the roof on some standardized, culturally biased test,
25:12and it all becomes about them.
25:14They hand me over to strangers, experts,
25:16a bunch of academic fucks who scrutinize everything I did or said or thought even.
25:21It is a fucking law of physics that the very act of observation changes that which is being observed.
25:31And now you're going to read that book and think that you know me.
25:37Well, you know what?
25:38You don't.
25:39Yeah, because you won't let me.
25:46Okay.
25:47Bye.
25:48What do you want to know?
25:53Ask me anything.
25:56Did you burn down that house that we made love in?
26:00Do you think I burned down the house?
26:03Really?
26:04That is so weird.
26:06Well, what am I supposed to think?
26:08You put my brother and me in the bus that killed our father?
26:10You get weird phone calls from screaming people that you won't explain it now?
26:13Oh, you want to make me feel stupid for being suspicious?
26:16Well, give me a fucking reason not to be.
26:23I just want to know what this is.
26:28For you.
26:32Am I just another step along your way?
26:38Okay, look.
26:41We obviously have an intense sexual connection.
26:44And yes, I would like for there to be something more than that.
26:49But that can't ever happen until you trust me, which apparently you don't.
26:55Should I trust you?
27:01Yes.
27:05Come here.
27:16R-A-K-E.
27:27Woo, triple letter square for K.
27:29Good one, Mom.
27:36H-E-L-L.
27:45H-E-L-L-O.
27:50Oh, hello.
28:01D-E-F-T.
28:08Deft.
28:09What is deft?
28:11Well, it's a laundry detergent from when Ruth and I were kids.
28:15No, it's a word.
28:16It means skilled.
28:19Really?
28:20Use it in a sentence.
28:22He deftly juggled his responsibilities.
28:26Deft.
28:28Huh.
28:30Or deft whereith I sting.
28:33Ha, ha.
28:41So how are you both doing?
28:43You know, with Nathaniel passing?
28:44Better every day.
28:46Yeah, you know, shit happens.
28:49You know, it's such an awful thing, losing some money you love.
28:52In terms of stress, it's right up there with moving and getting fired.
28:55Mm-hmm.
28:56I know when Ed and I split up, I was devastated.
28:58I didn't even want to get out of bed.
29:00I just wanted to curl up and die.
29:04And all I can say is, thank God for my precious daughter.
29:09Well, I just wouldn't let her move.
29:11Just wouldn't let her.
29:12Dragged her ass, pardon my French, out of bed and took her to spinning class with me.
29:16And I hated her for it at the time, but it really got me back on track.
29:20You know, endorphins really are nature's antidepressants.
29:23Mm-hmm.
29:23Mm-hmm.
29:23Life goes on.
29:24It doesn't go on by itself.
29:26Sometimes you just gotta kick it in the butt.
29:27But Ed didn't die.
29:30He's still alive.
29:31You can still see him.
29:33When Ginny gets married, you'll both be there.
29:37When she has children, they'll be able to know him.
29:43He's not gone forever.
29:47Well, sure, but in terms of the impact it had on both our lives, it's similar.
30:03Okay, I have the greatest idea.
30:05You guys are coming to spinning class with us tomorrow morning, bright and early.
30:09No offense, but I'd rather drive a rusty railroad spiked through my skull.
30:14Oh, just try it once.
30:16You might be surprised how it changes the way you feel.
30:19I feel fine.
30:20You know what, Ginny?
30:22That is an absolutely inspired idea.
30:27Okay, ladies, let's get to bed, because if your butt isn't on that bike by 6 a.m.,
30:31Derek doesn't let you in.
30:38So, these tits do nothing for you, huh?
30:41Well, I can appreciate that they're beautiful in their own completely artificial way.
30:46Oh, men loved them.
30:48Well, real men.
30:51You think God cares that you're gay?
30:56You think God cares that you've fucked 30 guys at once?
30:59Oh, so you equate being a fag with being a whore?
31:01No.
31:03Well, one's okay, but one isn't.
31:04I think God appreciates it when there's love involved.
31:06Oh, honey.
31:08I loved every man I ever fucked while I was fucking up.
31:30Oh, my God.
31:51What are you doing?
31:52Watching you.
31:59Claire, wake up.
32:01Get dressed.
32:02Why?
32:03We're leaving.
32:04How are you?
32:05Jesus, Mom, I'm starting to feel like Anne Frank.
32:07If we don't get out of here fast, we'll have to go spinning.
32:11Oh, my God.
32:33Thanks for buying me breakfast.
32:35Thank you for finding my cheese butt this morning.
32:37Any time.
32:41Oh, I have something for you.
32:48Wow.
32:49Oh, come on. It's just a key.
32:51No, no, no, this is great.
32:53I'm just a little surprised, that's all.
32:55I'm too nervous to eat.
32:56I'll just drink coffee until I start twitching and sweating.
32:59Why does being a deacon mean so much to you now?
33:02It wasn't even a consideration for you a week ago.
33:03Look, I know you think it's naive, but I see it as a chance to make a difference.
33:09Make the world just a little more tolerant.
33:10David, we have our own church in West Hollywood,
33:13which means the other churches in the diocese don't have to tolerate us.
33:16Frankly, I resent the notion that I need to be tolerated.
33:19So what, we should just allow ourselves to be ghettoized?
33:22Why do you embrace an organization that doesn't embrace you?
33:25The church embraces everyone.
33:26Oh, yeah, right. Hate the sin, love the sinner.
33:29The operative word being hate.
33:30What is with you?
33:31The other night you said you liked the idea.
33:35I had a chance to think.
33:42Isn't that your brother?
33:44Okay, look, can we just have breakfast
33:46without me feeling like I'm George Will
33:48and you're Cokie Roberts with PMS?
33:50You probably like George Will.
33:53Dave?
33:55Uh, hi.
33:56Hey.
33:58Keith, you remember my brother Nate, don't you?
34:01Yeah, how's it going?
34:01Hey, this is Brenda.
34:04My, uh, my girlfriend.
34:08I prefer the term fuck puppet.
34:10Ha ha.
34:11So what are you guys doing here?
34:13You, uh, just play racquetball?
34:14Uh, no, no, we just worked out.
34:18Oh, so you guys work out together?
34:24Uh, yeah.
34:26Yeah.
34:27Yeah, we do.
34:29Oh, well, uh, that's great.
34:33Uh, okay, great.
34:35Uh, okay, you guys have a great day.
34:38You too.
34:41I do it.
34:48Oh, my God, I think David is gay.
34:50I think David is lucky.
34:51Did you get a look at that guy?
34:52Hi.
35:01Claire.
35:05I had an affair.
35:10For the last two years, I was seeing someone.
35:15Your father never knew about it.
35:16At least I hope he didn't.
35:19And I called it off after he died.
35:23It's not something I'm proud of.
35:27Why are you telling me this?
35:29Because it's the truth.
35:31And whatever relationship you and I have, I want it to be honest.
35:35Even if you hate me.
35:38Mom, I don't hate you.
35:43I remember going to the movies on Monday nights.
35:46But I'm 17 years old now.
35:48And I have my own life.
35:50And there's things I have to figure out on my own.
35:54That's, like, normal.
35:59And I know stealing a foot is weird.
36:02But, hello, living in a house where a foot is available to be stolen is weird.
36:11I've got to get to school.
36:35Did you see his face?
36:36Oh, man.
36:37I know I shouldn't be laughing.
36:39But he just looks so stupefied, man.
36:40The way he was all, great, great.
36:42I'm hip.
36:42I'm cool.
36:43I'm proud of you, man.
36:45So, listen.
36:46This thing in Laguna is a Saturday night.
36:47I've got to sit in a room with the surfing sand.
36:49You ever been in?
36:50Uh, no.
36:51Oh, man.
36:52It's going to be great.
36:52I've got a fireplace overlooking the ocean.
36:54Keith, I don't think I can make it after all.
36:58I shouldn't miss church.
37:00Not while they're considering me for deaconship.
37:02I'm sorry.
37:04Fine.
37:07We'll come back Saturday night.
37:09That'll work.
37:09I can go to church with you on Sunday.
37:12It's not a good idea.
37:14This hasn't been a good idea from the beginning, has it?
37:16Fine.
37:16Why don't we cut our losses and call it quits right now?
37:19What?
37:20Look, as long as you feel the need to keep our relationship a secret.
37:23David, you're ashamed of it, man.
37:25I'm not having any of that.
37:26Not anymore.
37:27I just came out to my brother.
37:28One step forward.
37:29Now you want to take a giant leap backwards right into the arms of the enemy.
37:32So now I'm a Nazi collaborator?
37:34You know a lot of African Americans might say the same thing about you being a member of the LAPD?
37:39You fucking coward!
37:43Keith, please don't...
38:06Oh, it works.
38:09I must have left the stereo on again.
38:13So, you are not too freaked out?
38:17A little, maybe.
38:19It certainly makes David more interesting.
38:21No, I mean about me giving you a key to my apartment.
38:25Come on, what do you think I am?
38:26Some sort of aging Peter Pan who's going to disappear at the first sight of something a little more permanent?
38:30Well, yeah.
38:31When you wanted to talk, you couldn't even allow me to refer you as my girlfriend.
38:39Don't mind me.
38:43I thought we agreed that you would call before you came over.
38:47I did.
38:48The whole water's out of my building.
38:49I needed to take a shower.
38:51Oh, don't be mad at me.
38:53You know I hate it when you're mad at me.
38:55Hey, it's me.
38:57I need to use your shower, okay?
38:59Besides, I haven't seen you in a while.
39:01It's a fucking gorgeous day.
39:03Satisfied?
39:04I'm going to make a cup of tea.
39:06Hey.
39:08I'll take one of those.
39:09Hey.
39:09You baby or something.
39:14Hi.
39:15What's your name?
39:18Nate.
39:20Nice to meet you.
39:20I'm Billy.
39:24Hi.
39:26So, how long you known Brenda?
39:29A few months.
39:34So, uh...
39:36Who am I and why am I in your girlfriend's house practically naked?
39:40Yeah.
39:42She's my sister.
39:44She's my mother.
39:45Sister.
39:46My mother.
39:49Sorry.
39:50Nobody's ever left of that.
39:51I should know better.
39:53It's nice to meet you.
39:55So, you met the parents yet?
39:56Yes, last night.
39:58Wow.
39:59You've made it pretty far.
40:03So, why haven't I heard about you?
40:07No idea.
40:11Well, I guess I better go put some clothes on.
40:38How'd you get her breasts synchronized?
40:40Some sort of industrial epoxy?
40:45Would you ask Colonel Sanders for a secret recipe?
40:48Oh, come on.
40:49Am I going to tell?
40:50I'm going to tell.
40:54I stuck a can of cat food under each one.
40:58My sister-in-law did a cat food commercial.
41:01We've got like ten cases.
41:05Hey, I'm Larry Wadd.
41:11You know, I met Vivica St. John before she even did her first video.
41:18She was, uh, she was, uh, she was the fluffer on the set of Dirty Larry 3.
41:25She was, uh, friendly.
41:29She was eager.
41:31And, uh, I can honestly say I've never received a better blowjob in my life.
41:36Nobody was even filming it.
41:41When I first met Vivica, um, I met her on Deep Diving.
41:48And I had never gone down on a girl before, so naturally I was nervous.
41:53But Vivica was so warm and relaxed about it.
41:56She really put me at ease.
41:59Well, her and the two Xanax she gave me.
42:03And when I first had to do, uh, double penetration, I was, like, a total wreck.
42:08But Vivica came through, like, you know, like, such the pro she is.
42:14I mean, what?
42:23Nate, what the hell's going on in there?
42:25Uh, funeral.
42:27For whom?
42:28A prostitute?
42:31A woman who was, uh, star of adult videos.
42:37Mom, we're gonna clear, like, eight grand from this.
42:39We can finally pay for that air conditioning work.
42:45I'm just glad your sister is at school.
42:48This is awful.
42:50They're, like, best friends.
42:52And they're both, like, cheerleaders with this totally plastic way of life.
42:55Like, spinning class solves everything.
42:57And they're both, like, hot for the same guy.
43:00It was creepy.
43:09My mom's...
43:12My mom's just so fucking sad.
43:16I wish I could help her.
43:21Now, Mrs. Murdoch, some people prefer the solemnity of a church, and St. Bartholomew is a beautiful setting.
43:31Here, however, one is more free to customize the service.
43:35Oh, I'm sorry to interrupt.
43:36I just had to tell somebody.
43:39Vivica looks so great.
43:42Her tits have never looked better.
43:46She was like a sister to me.
43:57I'm so glad that you're pleased.
43:59Yeah.
44:00We want to remember her at her very best, don't we?
44:03No, I'm sorry, but I'm helping some other people right now.
44:07Okay.
44:08I'll talk to you after the service.
44:10Okay.
44:17I think we'll have Dad's service at the church.
44:20Fine.
44:21I'm not a religious man, but I do believe in God.
44:26If I were to make a list of the things I thank God for the most, fucking Viv would be
44:34at the top of that list.
44:36She was a goddamn force of nature, and I loved her, and I know God loved her, too.
44:43And I know that he knew just what he was doing, and how much joy she would bring to the
44:52world.
45:03For David James Fisher, chosen deacon in your church, we pray to you, O Lord.
45:09Lord, hear our prayer.
45:10That he may faithfully fulfill the duties of this ministry, build up your church, and glorify your name, we pray
45:16to you, O Lord.
45:18Lord, hear our prayer.
45:19That by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, he may be sustained and encouraged to persevere to the end, we
45:25pray to you, O Lord.
45:27Lord, hear our prayer.
45:28For all who fear God and believe in you, Lord Christ, that our divisions may cease, and that all may
45:35be as one, as you and the Father are one.
45:38We pray to you, O Lord.
45:40Lord, hear our prayer.
45:42For all who fear God and believe in you, O Lord, hear our prayer.
45:51I agree with you, O Lord.
45:55Way to go, Dave.
45:58All I have to do is turn to the Kiwanis Club, and Fisher and Sons will have our bases covered.
46:03Hey, where's Keith?
46:06He's just a friend, man.
46:12Very good to see you.
46:13Hello, Keith.
46:19So, Mom, what do you do tomorrow night?
46:21Nothing, as far as I know.
46:23Why?
46:24I thought maybe you want to go see a movie or rent a movie or something.
46:29Okay, but if you cry, the whole thing is off.
46:35Thanks for coming today.
46:37You must have found us all there.
46:38Are you kidding?
46:38I loved it.
46:40All that pageantry, it's so trippy.
46:42It's like a Fellini movie.
46:43Well, it was kind of cool being with you here, for God and everybody.
46:46Hmm.
46:50You don't really believe in God, do you?
46:53Well, yeah.
46:55I mean, I don't believe in some bearded old white man up in a cloud, but I believe in something.
47:00Some sort of undefinable creative force.
47:04I think it's just all totally random.
47:07Really?
47:08Yeah.
47:10We live, we die.
47:11Ultimately, nothing means anything.
47:14How can you live like that?
47:16I don't know.
47:17Sometimes I wake up so fucking empty.
47:18I wish I'd never been born, but what choice do I have?
47:22Yeah.
47:24I wish I could live like that.
47:25I wish I could live like that.
47:25I wish I could live like that.
47:25I wish I could live like that.
47:25I wish I could live like that.