- 2 days ago
Selling Out to The Burger Man
Caitlin "falls in love" with Les Bland, who buys her many new clothes. Meanwhile, Wyatt writes down a new jingle in order to be rewarded with free food and rehearsal space for a band at Burger McFlipsters.
Caitlin "falls in love" with Les Bland, who buys her many new clothes. Meanwhile, Wyatt writes down a new jingle in order to be rewarded with free food and rehearsal space for a band at Burger McFlipsters.
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TVTranscript
00:14so what do you think of my new outfit sweet scarf action silly it's not a scarf it's a
00:22pashmina this guy i'm kind of seeing gave it to me along with companion shoes so you shop and he
00:30pays sounds like a match made in heaven i know right aren't they sweet together i was talking
00:35about you and your new boyfriend oh right sounds kind of serious if he's buying you all that stuff
00:42who is he um actually i'm kind of drawing a blank you can't remember his name oh it's right on
00:49the
00:49tip of my tongue guess who oh uh talon no kyle no wade nope cam who tad okay this is
01:02awkward
01:02it's less of course less guys this is less hey yeah hey
01:15so are you ready for our big date oh sweetie love to but i so need to finish my chemistry
01:22assignment that's too bad because i have a khaki barn gift certificate and we could check out
01:28those bamboo purses you like well okay let's go
01:44what you got there bro my dad's old camera and my new gig you're looking at the official
01:51okay unofficial mall photographer jones already took some pictures of me and less you've got such a great
01:58eye this shot is amazing glad you like it and for the low low price of a fiver it can
02:04be yours for
02:05posterity i do look super cute in it and it would look good in a silver frame from willows and
02:11williams
02:11the cute ones with magnets for your locker are you thinking what i'm thinking willows and williams here
02:18we come
02:22okay is it me or did caitlin just get a sugar daddy that girl needs a good talking to she's
02:28got smarts
02:29i'll give her that i'm going to meet marlo before my shift starts she hasn't dumped you yet
02:35what you don't think i can score an amazing girl like marlo whatever the hard part isn't scoring the
02:40chick it's keeping her says the voice of experience
02:45fact for the first three months it's all about the bling babes love bling oh please i can barely
02:53afford lattes and with my parents running the basement i don't even have rehearsal space for
02:57the band now what kind of provider are you man marlo doesn't care about money she's not like that
03:03is she all chicks are like that
03:08i rest my case
03:12hold the burger hold the prize all i need is to look in your eyes and i'm all you can
03:17eat happy
03:19you're too much oh bravo
03:23see told you so
03:25wyatt this is cillian from head office i invited him here specifically to hear you sing
03:32wyatt burger mcflipsters needs to attract the next generation of mall leaders we need a ditty
03:38no an anthem that'll make kids flip for mcflipsters you mean a jingle in common parlance yes a catchy
03:48piece of ear candy written by you and performed with your band over the mall intercom wyatt can write
03:54it with his eyes closed you really think so it's not really my genre of course we throw in all
03:59the
03:59food the band can eat free fries all right babes love bling okay give us the rehearsal space for
04:08three months and you got a deal you drive a hard bargain kiddo sign here
04:18there's something i've been meaning to ask
04:22you're so pretty and nice and i was just wondering if you'd like to be my girl no question total
04:30love
04:31pink earmuffs so sweet oh are you okay you look kind of queasy never mind
04:41come on let's ring these up are you sure you want to buy these for me you've been paying for
04:46so much
04:47no worries money's not a problem great
05:00the jingle is it written
05:04judging by this piece of paper i'd say that you were jenga free
05:09oh no what am i gonna do marlo spent two hours venting the band that i could write something
05:15catchy and real that wouldn't embarrass us a jingo with street cred heavy order dude
05:21wait a second heavy order heavy dude that's it gotta go thanks man
05:29so
05:30don't tell me a gift from less it's faux fur not to second guess your feelings caitlin but are you
05:36sure you like less for the right reasons i know less isn't like other guys i've dated
05:41yeah most guys you date have a personality less is a really good listener like every time i say i
05:47like something he goes out and buys it for me okay shopping aside do you really think he's the one
05:53don't worry we're taking things slow slow you already have three complete outfits if you ask me
05:59caitlin hasn't even begun to milk this cow and who knows maybe he likes to buy stuff for caitlin's
06:05friends too guess who could somebody put a bell around his neck so we can hear him coming
06:13it's you i thought i'd never see you again
06:19less you shouldn't have
06:21gotta hand it to you williams you write a fierce jingle
06:30i knew you could do it you got talent wyatt see you guys
06:36wyatt you are one lucky man head office saw your demo tape and they want your band to perform live
06:43in the mall tomorrow wait that wasn't in the contract
06:46think about your career wyatt think about your band besides it is in the contract page 543
06:55great the band's gonna flip it's not that big a deal they'll be proud to sing your lyrics
06:59let me talk to them really no worries i'll call you later
07:09yeah baby crank that wind machine higher can you give me more pouts sweetheart uh perfect
07:20now we're talking okay now swing that lightsaber
07:30okay take five this better be important wyatt i'm working here this whole blank thing is getting
07:36out of hand cillian's making the band perform live jingles now warlow's gonna think i'm an idiot
07:42whoa whoa whoa calm down and stick to the plan what chick doesn't like a live music gig
07:47i don't know it's in the bag dude grow some stones why don't you
07:52now if you'll excuse me i have some paying customers to attend to
08:02what if jen's right what if he's not the one
08:06hmm haircut not so great a bit bland so much beige
08:14what do you think it's the one
08:25you got a permit for that paparazzo scum the camera can't resist a photogenic man in uniform
08:34such dignity
08:35nice heroic yet modest you can almost smell the burnt ammo
08:43and only five bucks a pop two copies on my desk by sunrise soldier
08:52thanks for coming out everybody we're here singing for burger mcflipsters
08:55but what we're really hoping to serve you is not just another fast food jingles
09:02you got that look in your eyes the look that says fries i'm burning for a burger
09:07with all the fixings rapid digestion out of the question
09:11but it don't matter cause it don't get bad
09:14if you're gonna go big go burger mcflipsters
09:19digestion out of the question
09:27that talentless burger flipper just cost us millions
09:32the kids are going to roll
09:37thanks
09:42bravo bravo
09:43i knew wyatt was the right choice
09:51congratulations wyatt you really connected to your audience
09:55wow thanks tim
09:57nurture employee morale check next item onions onions
10:01starting today mcflipsters is moving from freshly chopped onions to freeze dried onion chunkies
10:08well that'll make my job easier
10:10not so fast iron chef
10:11there's technique involved
10:13implements measurements calibration
10:15you add water right
10:17you say it like it's idiot proof
10:20here's your training video
10:21watch absorb master
10:24freeze dried food a space traveler's guide
10:27we use the same video as nasa
10:30no way
10:31is lance armstrong in it
10:34it's neil armstrong
10:35and no
10:36do you work here
10:37let's look busy people
10:38move move move
10:40so wyatt
10:41how does it feel to be famous
10:44well actually
10:45head office is loving you
10:47all they want is a few small changes to the lyrics for your next performance
10:52next performance look
10:54well the ones you wrote make the food sound unhealthy
10:58mcflipster meals need to sound nutritious energizing active
11:02but everything we sell is either freeze dried or soaked in fat
11:06don't get smart with me young man
11:08do you want to flip burgers for the rest of your life
11:11or do you want to be a star
11:14look i have to run this by marlo and the band before i rejig anything
11:18oh the rewrites already done
11:19i'll drop it by rehearsal tomorrow
11:21and besides
11:22i know it's in the contract
11:25yes
11:28thanks for coming guys
11:29the band will appreciate an objective opinion on the new lyrics
11:35ah what the
11:43your friend sillian dropped by
11:46he threatened to throw us all in jail for breach of contract if we didn't wear these costumes
11:51wyatt what's going on
11:53did you know about this
11:54of course not
11:55i thought sillian was just editing the lyrics
11:57yeah don't worry he did that too
12:01all the kids
12:03we're headed for mcflipsters
12:05ooh yeah
12:08we're hustling
12:11and bustling
12:14staying fit as we can
12:17we're in an active mood
12:19and we want active food
12:22stop
12:22oh man
12:23that is pathetic
12:25these costumes will destroy our street cred for life
12:29look there's gotta be a way around all this
12:31let me talk to sillian
12:32dude either you find us a get out of jail card pronto
12:35or you're out of the band
12:38marlo
12:38i need some time to talk this over with the band
12:41alone
12:44come on
12:49say cheeseburger
12:50jonesy
12:56we were so good together
12:58i'm so sorry wyatt
13:00let's not jump to conclusions
13:02she hasn't dumped him yet
13:04we were there
13:05i'd say he's pretty much dumped
13:07ah
13:07so you screwed up
13:09big deal
13:10there's plenty of chicks in the sea
13:12i screwed up
13:13this whole bling thing was your idea
13:15i signed that stupid contract just to impress marlo
13:18and now the band hates me and i've lost her forever
13:21nice work cyrano
13:22poor wyatt
13:23was it really that bad
13:25those costumes can't have been worse than this lemon hat
13:28way worse
13:29ouch
13:31check it out
13:34oh that's bad
13:36so why did you take that nasty shot
13:38yeah i thought you were charging for them
13:40no one's gonna pay for an embarrassing shot like that
13:43actually it's all part of my new business strategy
13:46the way i see it
13:47there's more money in offering to erase shots
13:50than in printing them
13:51check it out
13:54i can charge a fortune for these
13:57jonesy
13:58you can't go making money off people's misfortunes like that
14:01it's wrong
14:03totally
14:04how much for that last one
14:08isn't it adorable less
14:13i'll be right there
14:16and how will you be paying for this
14:20with great difficulty
14:21look
14:22less
14:23not my business
14:24but
14:25are you sure you can afford all this
14:27i can't not afford it
14:29shopping is what caitlin and i do
14:31it's the tie that binds
14:33yeah noose that hangs is more like it
14:35wait here
14:40excuse me
14:42what
14:42you're fully dressed caitlin
14:44oh
14:45lost track for a second
14:46does the phrase
14:47gravy train about to derail
14:49mean anything to you
14:50what are you talking about
14:52haven't you ever wondered how a 16 year old kid
14:54is financing a wardrobe fit for a shipping heiress
14:57no
14:58do you think i should get the pink or the white in this
15:01uh gotta go
15:03uh gotta go now
15:09hello
15:14nicky
15:15is that you
15:17is that you i need to talk to someone who speaks caitlin i'm fluent just speak slowly
15:21uh-huh
15:22uh-huh
15:24uh-huh
15:24okay i'll be right over
15:26don't let her do any more shopping until i get there
15:34what's the hold up
15:35patience dude
15:37good food good food takes time it might help if onion chunkies came in bulk
15:43why do they have to make the packet so tiny
15:45gotta be for freshness
15:47whyatt i thought i could trust you
15:49i found this
15:51still in its shrink wrap
15:53hey
15:53i didn't get my free sea monkeys
15:55my sea monkeys were just a bunch of dehydrated onions
15:59hey
16:00there's something on my burger
16:02it's alive
16:03mine too
16:09all right
16:14huh
16:16you've been putting live sea monkeys on burgers
16:27let me out nikki
16:29the stores are closing in half an hour
16:31okay i'm here
16:32where's caitlin
16:37caitlin we're worried about you
16:39we think you're only dating less because he buys you stuff
16:42what are you talking about
16:44less than i have tons in common
16:46like what
16:48besides shopping
16:49well
16:50we both like
16:53um
16:54okay maybe shopping's all we do together but we both really enjoy it
16:59and who's paying all the bills
17:00less is
17:01but it's okay
17:02less loves shopping and he's got plenty of money
17:05nah
17:06the guy's broke
17:07what
17:08less is that true
17:10well
17:11yes
17:12why didn't you say something
17:14because i was afraid that the only reason you liked me
17:18is because i buy you stuff
17:21it's true isn't it
17:24well
17:25well i'm such an idiot
17:30oh you're not going to be a**
17:31oh you guys were right
17:32oh you guys were right
17:33oh poor less
17:34this whole thing is my fault
17:36this whole thing is my fault
17:37what am i gonna do
17:38well the path to redemption is clear and it's straight down the return aisle
17:43oh like shopping only in reverse i can do that
17:48I know you see this coming.
17:50Let's get it over with.
17:52Wyatt, I'm sorry, but the band wants you out.
17:54You're just too commercial for them.
17:56I totally understand why I'm being dumped.
17:59The only reason I got the band into this mess was because I thought it would impress you.
18:02Impress me?
18:03It's your talent and personality that impress me, not free fries or rehearsal space.
18:09Plus, I really like the way you smell.
18:15Wait a minute.
18:16The band's dumping me, but you're not?
18:18You can't get rid of me that easy.
18:20Just promise that A, you'll be yourself from now on, and B, you'll get these fries away from me.
18:27It's getting kind of gross.
18:28Done.
18:29Let me talk to the guys.
18:31Maybe they'll let you stay in the band after all.
18:36She likes the way I smell.
18:40Beat it, hold your top.
18:42I think I'll miss you most of all.
18:44What's all this?
18:46A returns pile.
18:47Huh?
18:48Guys, can we have some privacy?
18:53Les, after all those shopping trips, why didn't you tell me you were broke?
18:57I tried, but you never listened to anything I said, unless it involved colors and fabrics.
19:05That's not true.
19:07Okay, it is.
19:08I just got so swept away by our shopping chemistry, our relationship took a back seat.
19:14To be honest, what I really liked was being seen with you.
19:18I knew it!
19:20Sorry.
19:22Seen with?
19:23All my life I've been an invisible loser.
19:26But everyone noticed me when I was with you, as Caitlyn's boyfriend, I was a somebody.
19:32Well, now you can be Caitlyn's ex.
19:35That's something, too.
19:37Now come on, let's return everything before it's too late.
19:40Wait.
19:40I want you to have a little something to remember me by.
19:46It's gonna take more than that.
19:55It's official, guys.
19:56I'm a mere burger flipper once again.
19:58I told Cillian to find someone else to sing his jingle.
20:00And he didn't even fire me.
20:02That makes one of us.
20:03I'm gonna chill on the photography thing for a while.
20:06What happened to your eye, Jonesy?
20:07Wyatt's boss threw my camera at it when I took pictures of all of his customers barfing up sea monkeys.
20:14Whoa, chill.
20:15I can't believe they didn't fire you, Wyatt.
20:18Yeah, turns out sea monkeys are actually brine shrimp.
20:21They're alive, but technically edible.
20:24Edible, yes.
20:26But not easy on the old stomach muscle.
20:45Mmm, meh.
20:55I'll see you then.
20:56Cheers.
20:57Cheers.
20:59Cheers.
20:59Cheers.
20:59Cheers.
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