- 2 hours ago
مسلسل Last Man Standing مترجم - Episode 4
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:01Halloween. It's an early Christian deal.
00:04Constantine made a deal with the Celts so that they would have Halloween
00:07because they figured on that day the dead would return to Earth
00:09and we dress up spooky to ward off the dead.
00:12I know, Dad.
00:13Did I ever tell you the story?
00:14Yeah, in the car.
00:16Oh, wow. You don't see this much anymore.
00:19Lady Hobo.
00:22Huh?
00:23Maybe.
00:24Yeah, maybe.
00:25Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
00:27Lady Ninja.
00:29Sure.
00:29Yeah, here's one.
00:31Whoa, here's some kind of joke.
00:33Lady President.
00:36It could happen.
00:38Whatever you want, Dad.
00:39What do you mean, whatever I want?
00:41Come on.
00:43Aren't you into this anymore?
00:44Sure I am.
00:46Be honest.
00:48Dad, I'm super psyched to go trick-or-treating with you.
00:51I know how much you like looking into our neighbors' houses.
00:54Listen, I know that trick-or-treating is something you and I do together.
00:57But if you're over this, I am...
01:00I'm okay.
01:02Really?
01:03I don't want to cause a medical problem.
01:07I'm really okay.
01:09I don't want to go trick-or-treating.
01:12Huh.
01:23Are you sure you're not mad?
01:24Yeah, I'm sure I'm not mad.
01:26I'm okay.
01:26It's just that I'm 13 now and the whole dress-up thing kind of seems ridiculous.
01:30Arrr!
01:35Shiver me timbers!
01:37Isn't that the patch I wore when I had pink eye?
01:40Oh, yeah.
01:44Ugh, that outfit is so embarrassing.
01:47What's her problem?
01:48Well, maybe it's that we're used to seeing you more as a mom and less as a prostitute.
01:56I'm a pirate princess.
01:58Yeah.
02:00Shouldn't your treasures be a little more buried?
02:03Every year we go to the Miller's party.
02:05And every year I'm the same goody-goody character like Alice in Wonderland or Cinderella.
02:10Last year you went as Margaret Thatcher.
02:12Last year I didn't dress up.
02:16Let me finish.
02:18I just thought I'd shake things up a little.
02:21Well, you sure are every time you move.
02:24So, uh, you like it?
02:25Well, would you be willing to wear that to our anniversary weekend at the cabin?
02:30Mmm, maybe.
02:32I like it.
02:33Hey, Dad, did you happen to pick up the kitty costume I reserved for Stella's party?
02:37Oh, yeah, the fur-lined bikini with the cat ears?
02:40Yep, that's the one.
02:41Yeah, I saw it.
02:42That's why I got you this.
02:47What is that?
02:48This is Garfield, America's favorite cat.
02:52But that would cover my entire body.
02:55That's right.
02:56Here, take this.
02:57Listen, Halloween's not an excuse for you to dress up like a tramp.
03:00Baby, you are better than that.
03:01No, I'm not.
03:03Honey, your father's right.
03:05That Alley Cat costume is totally inappropriate.
03:09Honey, do your panties say booty?
03:13Oh, gross. Dad just said panties.
03:16Don't forget the head.
03:17Hey, Mom, can you take Boyd?
03:18Because I'm late for my shift.
03:20Oh, you have to work on Halloween?
03:22Yeah, but, you know, I don't mind.
03:24People tend to tip bigger when they're dressed like idiots.
03:27Yeah, it was last year that Frankenstein guy gave her a $100 tip.
03:30Yeah, but that's just because I screwed his knob back on.
03:34Does anybody need to hear that?
03:37So, Boyd's dinner is in the refrigerator and his pajamas are on his bed.
03:40And look at the costume I got him.
03:42Baby, look at this.
03:43No, no, no. Dad, Boyd's not trick-or-treating.
03:45No, I can take him.
03:46No, no, he's too young for all that pagan death imagery.
03:49Pagan death imagery?
03:51Yeah, you know, like skeletons, ghosts, zombies.
03:53Ugh, it's just like the ancient Celts who put on costumes to avoid being recognized as humans by evil spirits.
03:59So that stuff sinks in.
04:01But not the stuff like maybe check your oil before the engine seizes up.
04:04Or using proper birth control.
04:08Look, I don't want any of that sinking into Boyd's head.
04:10Nothing's sinking in, he's too.
04:12I tell that kid five times he didn't pull my finger still has no idea where the noise is coming
04:15from.
04:17I'm sorry, Dad. No trick-or-treating.
04:19Listen, we don't want this kid being that weird kid who can't go out on Halloween.
04:22Oh, come on, he's not gonna be the weird kid.
04:24He will if we're not careful.
04:25Look, I'm not the perfect father, but I didn't raise any weirdos.
04:39I think someone threw up in here.
04:47Hi, Mike Baxter here for Outdoor Man.
04:50And we know what you guys like.
04:52Firm rump, long legs, great rack.
04:56We're talking deer here.
04:58That's right. It's Halloween.
04:59It's deer season up in the hills.
05:01It's time to get out there and do some hunting.
05:03Before we do that, we've got to think about gun safety.
05:05We've got a guy here who's going to tell us how to take our guns out of storage.
05:08Gary McKager here.
05:09He's a firearms expert, ballistics, bullets, knows everything about guns.
05:12Gary, once we've got the bolt clean, you're going to hold on to the gun.
05:17There you go.
05:19By the time you're ready, just tell us exactly how to pull it out of storage.
05:26Gary is not afraid of any animal.
05:28But much like the rhesus monkey, he's terrified of cameras.
05:31Gary, Gary.
05:33All right, let's take a break and maybe get Gary an energy bar.
05:38This is just horrible.
05:39And you know what else?
05:40Your girlfriend says I can't trick or treat with Boyd.
05:43I know.
05:44Can you talk to her?
05:45No way.
05:46What do you mean, no way?
05:47Look, I said to her, aren't you excited about Halloween?
05:51And she said, not really.
05:52I said, me neither.
05:55Now I'm stuck.
05:58Nice backbone, Susan.
06:01Hey, Ed.
06:02Your gun expert is a moron.
06:04He's acting like a zombie in front of the camera.
06:06Oh, Halloween humor.
06:08I like that.
06:09You coming to my house tonight to trick or treat?
06:11With who?
06:11Eve doesn't want to trick or treat anymore.
06:13And Grandpa's not allowed to take Boyd out.
06:15Wait a minute.
06:16Halloween builds character.
06:18Any two-year-old who can walk up to a man with a chainsaw and demand candy can do anything.
06:26Boyd should be allowed to experience Halloween now while his brain is still soft.
06:31Exactly.
06:33You know, I knew this day was coming.
06:34I did.
06:35This is going to be a lousy Halloween.
06:38Mike, don't be such a Debbie Downer.
06:40I know what will cheer you up.
06:43Please, Ed, don't put on Monster Mash.
06:45Why do you think I'm going to play Monster Mash?
06:47You think you know me so well.
06:52I was working in the lab.
06:54You got me.
06:55You got me.
06:56I dare you not to smile.
06:58I dare you.
06:59Come on, man.
07:00You see, most people think this song is about monsters having a party.
07:03Because, Ed, it is about monsters having a party.
07:08You know what else it's about?
07:09Please don't tell me it's about family.
07:11It's about family.
07:16Ahoy.
07:19Hey, want to help me hand out candy?
07:22Want me to help you find your pants?
07:24It's very funny.
07:26Oh, here we go.
07:27Trick or treat.
07:28Hey, I say treat.
07:32Vanessa?
07:33Hey, Bill.
07:33Wow.
07:35Who knew?
07:38Who knew?
07:39Who knew what?
07:40Nothing.
07:41It's just that I never thought of you like that.
07:47We should go.
07:52That was weird.
07:53Well, off to Stella's party dressed as some ridiculous overweight cat.
07:58I think you look adorable.
08:00Me, too.
08:01I could totally see you floating over a Thanksgiving Day parade.
08:04And the evening just keeps getting better and better.
08:12At ease, everyone.
08:16Who am I?
08:18John Wayne Longest Day.
08:19No.
08:19John Wayne's hands at Iwo Jima.
08:20John Wayne Green Brace.
08:22Bingo.
08:23He was trusty sidekick.
08:27Senor Bones.
08:29Oh, look how cute.
08:32Well, you're not taking him trick or treating, are you?
08:35No.
08:35We're just going to sit here and hand out candy like all the other shut-ins.
08:41Speaking of candy, where's all the good stuff we bought?
08:44In my nightstand.
08:48I'll get it.
08:51He looks really cute.
08:53Doesn't he?
08:54You know who'd really think he is cute?
08:55Is that old lady on the corner, Mrs. Tanner.
08:57She's like 90.
08:58She doesn't have many Halloweens left.
09:00I guess we could go down there and show her this little costume.
09:03We won't trick or treat.
09:04We'll just walk around and look at the house and decorations.
09:06You want to go with us?
09:07Uh, Dad, Kristen told you not to.
09:09Ha!
09:09Last time I checked my watch, it still said America.
09:13That doesn't even make sense!
09:24Ha!
09:24Ha!
09:25Ha!
09:25Ha!
09:25Ha!
09:25Look at this place.
09:27Ooh, spooky!
09:29Happy Halloween, guys.
09:32Ha!
09:33Ha!
09:35Ha!
09:37Ha!
09:37Ha!
09:38Ha!
09:40Ha!
09:41Ha!
09:47Ha!
09:48Ha!
09:48Ha!
09:48Ha!
09:49Hey, Ed.
09:50You made it, Mike!
09:51Thank you!
09:51That wouldn't be Halloween without stopping by your house, Ed.
09:54Ha!
09:55Hey, Boyd!
09:55How are you, pal?
09:57Uh-huh, listen.
09:58I don't want to crap all over your outfit, but that's not even anatomically close.
10:04So, Kristen changed her mind, huh?
10:06No, no, no.
10:07I changed my mind about listening to her.
10:09I mean, come on.
10:09You gotta blame Boyd here.
10:10He looks so darn cute in the thing, doesn't he?
10:12Look at it.
10:12Oh, yeah, but what if Kristen finds out?
10:15I'm a Green Beret.
10:17Do I look like I'm afraid of what my daughter's gonna say?
10:19That's good.
10:20Cause she's coming up to work.
10:22What?
10:23Ha!
10:25Ha!
10:26Ha!
10:26Ha!
10:27Ha!
10:28Look at this place, Ed!
10:29I mean, it's amazing.
10:31It's better than last year.
10:32Yeah, thanks.
10:32I'm kinda showing off for my new lady friend.
10:35Ha!
10:36Ha!
10:37Ha!
10:38Ha!
10:38Ha!
10:38Ha!
10:41Ha!
10:42Ha!
10:42I'm Mike Baxter, and you look like Elvira.
10:46I am Elvira.
10:49I travel first class, Mike.
10:50But I don't travel at all.
10:53Well, I am gonna go mix up some very Bloody Marys.
10:58Excuse me.
11:01She really goes out all out for Halloween, huh?
11:03She has no idea it's Halloween.
11:07Happy Halloween, my girl.
11:09I'll see you tomorrow.
11:10Here you go.
11:11Happy Halloween.
11:19Where'd your dad go?
11:20I can't tell you.
11:21Where's Boyd?
11:22I can't tell you.
11:23Did you take Boyd trick-or-treating?
11:24That's what I can't tell you.
11:28I'm not just saying that because I'm a pirate.
11:32Whatever.
11:33Hey, hey, hey, hey.
11:34You love Halloween.
11:36What's going on?
11:37Nothing.
11:38No, and let's skip the part where I keep asking
11:40and you keep saying nothing.
11:43It's Victor Blake.
11:44Oh, the nice boy whose ankle you broke?
11:46It was a stress fracture.
11:49He thinks Halloween is for kids.
11:51So?
11:52I want him to see me as a woman.
11:55Oh, honey, you're in the eighth grade.
11:57Yeah, and he's a knight.
11:58He's practically a year away from being almost old enough
12:00to learn how to drive.
12:03Oh, hold that thought.
12:36Hello again, Bill.
12:38Except the dentist down the street gives you toothbrushes.
12:41There's something wrong with him.
12:44I can't believe you took Boyd trick-or-treating.
12:46Well, believe it.
12:47Kristen is going to kill you.
12:49Oh, cut it out.
12:49She's not going to find out about it.
12:50A little nuke had a great time.
12:52Right, Boyd?
13:08Wait a minute.
13:09That's the Wong kid.
13:10I know, it's the Wong kid.
13:12Where's Boyd?
13:13No, I mean that's Jimmy Wong from down the street.
13:15But if we have Jimmy Wong, then where's...
13:18I got to go find Boyd.
13:28Call the Wongs and the police.
13:30Tell them I'm checking all the way up to Hudson Street.
13:33Oh, thank goodness.
13:34Mike, Mike, wait, wait, come back.
13:36Come back.
13:36It's the Wongs.
13:37They have Boyd.
13:38Yes, yes, we do.
13:40Okay, that would be great.
13:41Thank you so much.
13:42Oh, they're on their way over with Boyd right now.
13:45Empty the column.
13:46I think I got to throw up.
13:49Just relax.
13:50I think it's going to be okay.
13:51Okay, I just about lost our grandson.
13:53Yeah, and then kidnapped another kid.
13:55I didn't kidnap anybody.
13:57I just grabbed somebody else's kid,
13:59gave him a bunch of candy,
14:00and brought him to my house.
14:02Mike, could you please not repeat that story to the police?
14:06How could you not know that this wasn't Boyd?
14:08It's Halloween, for God's sakes.
14:10This neighborhood's filthy with skeletons.
14:13It turns out it's not that original of an outfit.
14:17Hey, Mandy.
14:19Hey.
14:20Hey.
14:22Were you just trying to sneak by us?
14:24No.
14:24No, no, no.
14:25Really?
14:26Because it seemed like you were slinking in.
14:27No, I'm a cat, remember?
14:29So, meow, come on.
14:31Get down here.
14:33Right now.
14:34Right here.
14:36Open that coat.
14:48Where's the Garfield costume?
14:49Dad, this is Garfield.
14:50Look, look, look.
14:51This is his tail, and these are his ears.
14:54Where's his head?
14:55It's in a dumpster behind the gas station.
14:59You know, I put a deposit on that head.
15:02That's Becky Wong's little brother.
15:04She's in the grade behind me.
15:05Yeah, for now.
15:07Yeah, I used to babysit him.
15:08Good, you can babysit him right now.
15:10Keep him comfortable, will you?
15:11All right.
15:12Oh, thank goodness.
15:13That must be Judge Wong and her husband.
15:20Was that Wong?
15:21No, that was Bill Calhoun from up the street.
15:24Remind me to get our spare key back from them.
15:28Uh, hey, Dad, I think I just heard Kristen parking her car.
15:30Everything's gonna be fine.
15:31Okay.
15:32Why are you telling me?
15:33I'm practicing.
15:34Okay.
15:35Listen, I'm gonna just stall her until the Wongs get here with Boyd.
15:38Hey, keep a low center of gravity.
15:40She'll never get by you.
15:44Hi, guys.
15:45Hey, sweetie.
15:46Get any monster tips?
15:49Get it?
15:50Yeah, because I heard it 40 times tonight.
15:53But, you know, you said it the best, Dad.
15:55Hey, where are you going?
15:56Um, I'm gonna go check on Boyd.
15:57Before you go, I'd like to know about your day, so catch me up.
16:00Um, well, it sucked.
16:01You're all cut up.
16:02Come on.
16:03It's a diner.
16:05Halloween.
16:05There must be something to make Dad laugh.
16:06Come on.
16:07Um, okay.
16:09Um, oh, oh, the fry cook wore a costume that was highly flammable.
16:15Kitchen bloopers.
16:16That's funny.
16:16I thought you would like that.
16:18Um, oh, boy.
16:20Uh, hold on, Christian.
16:22Stop for a second.
16:22Let me tell you something.
16:23I end up taking Boyd trick-or-treating.
16:25What?
16:25Um, after I said not to?
16:27Mm-hmm.
16:28Oh, I have never been so angry at you.
16:30Stick around.
16:34I'm sorry.
16:35Who's this?
16:37Boyd's on his way back here right now.
16:39Back from where?
16:40Because everybody that he knows is in this room.
16:42The Wongs.
16:43The Wongs?
16:45That's probably them right now.
16:46Oh, you'll be laughing about this tomorrow morning.
16:50I can explain.
16:54Hey, Victor.
16:55Yes, sir.
16:56Um, can I talk to Eve?
16:57Victor?
16:58Trick-or-treat.
17:02Dad.
17:07What are you doing here?
17:09I thought you hated Halloween.
17:11Yeah, but I know you like it, so...
17:14Listen, my mom's in the car, and I was wondering if you wanted to hang out at my house and
17:18maybe hand out candy and stuff.
17:21Dad?
17:22Sure.
17:23Have a lot of fun.
17:24Not too much.
17:25I know where you live, Victor.
17:28Yes, sir.
17:32Kristen.
17:32Look, I can't live like this.
17:33I am moving in with Kyle.
17:35Oh, I call dibs on your room.
17:37I am not actually moving in with Kyle.
17:39It's an empty threat.
17:39Like when you say you're going to college.
17:43Boyd's fine.
17:44He's with a family practice judge and a pediatrician.
17:47He's safer with them than with us.
17:49Well, I think you've proven that.
17:51Uh, let's get Jimmy something to eat.
17:53Oh, yeah, I think he just made some room.
18:02Seriously, Dad?
18:03What the hell?
18:04I took your sister to get her costume, and she didn't want to get a costume.
18:07So I bought Boyd something, and he looked really cute in that.
18:09And I wanted to show him off, and it just brought back memories of taking all you girls, trick-or
18:14-treating.
18:14And I think I, uh, you know, got too excited with Boyd.
18:18I'm sorry about that.
18:21So, did Boyd have fun?
18:25Up until I lost him.
18:31Boyd's first Halloween.
18:32I really wish I could have gone with him.
18:34It's not that late.
18:35Your dress is a waitress.
18:37Come on.
18:38Go.
18:38Take him.
18:39Okay, okay.
18:39All right, only if you come with us, though.
18:42I'd love to.
18:44You know, it'd make it perfect.
18:45What?
18:45If we actually had Boyd.
18:49She's a judge.
18:50Be very nice to her.
18:51All right.
18:53Oh, Boyd.
18:54Boyd.
18:54Hey.
18:55Hi, baby.
18:55Good to see you, buddy.
18:56Come on in.
18:57Jimmy.
18:59Oh, hey.
19:00I'm so sorry about this, Doc.
19:01Are we okay?
19:02Okay.
19:03You took my boy.
19:04Well, they all look alike.
19:07Skeletons.
19:09This is not over.
19:10You know, you took my grandson, too.
19:12How do I know who took him first?
19:13I know you took mine.
19:14Mr. Wong, please, won't you accept our most sincere apologies?
19:19Well, we are practically neighbors.
19:23I'll get out.
19:24You're so good.
19:26You're so good.
19:27It's good.
19:28Hold on, hold on, hold on.
19:31You take your phone, please.
19:33I'll take you.
19:35Thank you very much.
19:37Goodbye.
19:37Hey, happy Halloween.
19:38Thank you both for coming over.
19:40So sorry.
19:43She is so lovely.
19:50Vanessa, Vanessa, my pirate princessa, right from the start, you plundered my heart, I must confess-a.
20:02Vanessa, Vanessa, Vanessa, Vanessa, Vanessa.
20:10Bill?
20:13Vanessa?
20:14Yeah.
20:17Where's your pirate outfit?
20:19It's in storage.
20:23The boots, too?
20:25Bill, go home.
20:28See a carpool?
20:29No.
20:31I understand.
20:43All right, Boyd.
20:46This is the first law of hunting.
20:49If you shoot it, you gotta eat it.
20:53That's right.
20:53Let's say this is the deer you just shot when you're up by our cabin.
20:57Honey, uh, Mike, honey.
20:59He's two years old.
21:00I'm just trying to teach you to eat the whole thing.
21:02Yeah, but do you have to tell him that he killed him?
21:06Do something appropriate.
21:08Why don't you just say the spoon is a choo-choo train or something.
21:10Make it, you know.
21:11Choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo.
21:12Okay, make it.
21:13Choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo.
21:13Trains coming down the track.
21:15What's in the track but a big, fat deer?
21:18We killed that deer.
21:20Try this here.
21:23Mmm.
21:31Wrecky Wrecky Wrecky Wrecky!
Comments