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00:00Hey guys! Hey guys! Welcome or welcome back to my YouTube channel. Today is day 6 of our 45 day
00:15journey.
00:15So for 45 days, I'm making a video every single day to encourage you guys, share with you things I
00:23learned on my crazy journey of life.
00:26Things that have taken me through, things I've learned over these last 8, almost 9 years of traveling the world
00:35solo.
00:36I've been to over 139 countries or I've been to 139 countries. I'm on a mission to visit every country
00:44in the world.
00:45I'm a professional skydiver. I've overcome a lot of things all by myself, just me and God.
00:52And I feel like I have a lot to offer you guys. So for the next 45 days, I'm going
00:56to be sharing things that I think will encourage you and help you.
01:00They're also things that I've learned and continue to help and encourage me.
01:03And I'm simultaneously fundraising, so I have a last leg.
01:09I have come so far, you guys know, in my mission to visit every single country in the world, but
01:15we still got that little chunk left.
01:17I've got 60 countries that I have to visit before I can say that I've been to every country in
01:25the world.
01:25So I'm fundraising to help me do that and to continue to bring you guys videos of my world travels.
01:34So yeah, we have raised, the goal is to raise 60k.
01:38We have, as of today, raised $11,520, I think.
01:46Yeah, I'll put it on the screen.
01:48The goal is 60k and I think we can get there in the next 45 days.
01:53Thank you so much. I'm shouting you guys out who donate every single day.
01:57Um, so the people who donated yesterday were Lisa Ingram, Ingram, Ingram.
02:05Thank you so much, Lisa.
02:08Lisa donated $50. Thank you so much, Lisa. God bless you.
02:11I'm crazy mission. I appreciate it more than you know.
02:14Thank you so much. And thank you so much to, to me.
02:19Okay, I don't want to butcher last names.
02:21I really don't because people butcher my last name all the time.
02:24My whole life, no one has really ever said my last name right.
02:28So, uh, I'm going to say to me.
02:31I don't want to butcher your last name.
02:32Um, even though I think I can probably say it, but I don't want to say it wrong.
02:37Donated $10. Thank you so much for your donation.
02:39I am humbled beyond humbled.
02:42I am so grateful for you guys.
02:43And, um, so yeah, if you, uh, want to support this channel and the mission,
02:50I'll put my GoFundMe in the description box of this video.
02:53Uh, we're going to keep moving until the whole thing is raised.
02:57I think you can do it in the next 45 days, whether it's a $5 donation or more.
03:01It is a piece of the puzzle that helps so much.
03:04So thank you guys so much.
03:05So today's topic, we are going to talk about, um, something that took me years to learn.
03:11Oh my gosh.
03:12If I could have learned this 10 years ago, it would have saved me so much trouble in my life.
03:17It would have saved me so much heartbreak.
03:19It would have saved me so much time.
03:21And that is, you do not have to force what is for you.
03:28We don't want to hear that as humans.
03:30We really don't.
03:30We want to hear anything but that.
03:33You don't have to force what is for you.
03:36Do you know what actually believing that information can do for a person?
03:42Do you have any idea the power?
03:45The thing is, we ask God for, I think one reason we don't have a lot of our prayers answered
03:51here on earth is because we ask God for a bunch of stupidity.
03:57Like we're asking him for miracles.
04:00We're asking him for all this stuff.
04:02And he's like, you would have everything.
04:05Confidence, consistency, and discipline.
04:07Do you have any idea what those things can bring you in life?
04:10I'm going to focus on confidence in this video.
04:13Confidence is one of the most powerful currencies on this planet.
04:17Lack of confidence is like a cancer.
04:20It's almost like a weed.
04:22It will ruin so many different areas of your life so that nothing blooms the way it's supposed to.
04:29Because you've got these weeds that you are not uprooting.
04:32Lack of confidence makes you try to force and control and manipulate and forge and force and control and manipulate
04:41and fear and worry and control.
04:44Where confidence lets go.
04:47Confidence says, I know who I am.
04:51I don't need to be jealous.
04:53I don't need to tear other people down.
04:55I don't need to try to attract people to me.
04:58I don't need to try to force people into my life or force them to stay.
05:03If they want to stay, they stay.
05:04If they want to go, they go.
05:05But I know who I am.
05:09You knowing who you are.
05:12Which is an amazing one of one, by the way.
05:16One of one.
05:17Okay?
05:18Like, don't let that go over your head.
05:20You are one of one.
05:23There is no other you.
05:26That right there is enough to be confident.
05:28That right there.
05:29That God thought you needed to be here on this planet.
05:33He could have made anybody, but he made you.
05:35And he thought that, you know, the world needed you.
05:39But the problem is, we don't have a lot of confidence.
05:42I think it gets messed up when early we go to school and we start to rank ourselves.
05:47How attractive are we?
05:48How smart are we?
05:49Maybe we don't have a supportive family that tells us good things.
05:53We, somewhere in our childhood, develop a lack of confidence.
05:57And unfortunately, it tapers through our life.
05:59And it just wreaks havoc through our life.
06:04And, you know, I'm going to go there.
06:07I'm going to talk about relationships.
06:08And unfortunately, a lot of us women...
06:12You know what?
06:13I can't speak on men.
06:14Because maybe men, you'll have to let me know.
06:15But a lot of women, we get our heart broken because we try...
06:20We go for the man that we know isn't treating us well.
06:26Because we don't have confidence to think that we deserve better.
06:29A confident woman would say,
06:31No, I'm not going to deal with this in a man.
06:35Because I know I deserve better.
06:37But we don't do that, do we?
06:38No.
06:38We accept bad treatment.
06:41And then we allow ourselves to get hurt.
06:42And I'm right here to tell you,
06:45I've been there.
06:46I've been the person that's like,
06:48No, I'm going to make this work.
06:49Even though the person is clearly showing me that they don't like me.
06:53They don't value me.
06:54But something in me, lack of confidence, says,
06:57I have to hold on to this because I'm not going to get anything better.
07:00The thing is,
07:03No matter if it's a man, if it's a relationship,
07:06If it's a woman, if you're a guy,
07:07Same thing can happen with a woman.
07:09Whether it's friendships,
07:10Whether it is a certain position in life,
07:14You have got to believe you are the thing before the thing happens to you.
07:18You cannot work backwards.
07:21Like, everybody says that.
07:23Every person who's ever succeeded says,
07:25I already knew I was that successful person before I saw the evidence.
07:29It's so true.
07:30It is so true.
07:31You have got to be the person you think that you are
07:34Before you see the results of that person.
07:36That's how you're going to get it.
07:38Same thing with attracting people.
07:40Same thing with,
07:42And this is the angle that I really want to emphasize.
07:48You, we all have,
07:50The word the young people of this generation use is aura.
07:55But like, let's actually talk about the word aura.
07:58I think aura is very real.
08:00We all have like a scent to us.
08:03Stay with me.
08:04You can put on cologne.
08:06You can put on body butters.
08:08You can put on stuff to make you smell good, right?
08:11But do you know that you have a scent already?
08:13There is a smell coming off of you that's not necessarily a physical smell.
08:18You have, I guess the word is aura.
08:22There is a way about you that everybody smells.
08:26Everybody smells it.
08:27And it's not a physical smell.
08:29A lot of people, I think bullies are one of the great examples of a lack of confidence
08:35that is trying to shape-shift itself into hating everybody.
08:40So lack of confidence can show up in a lot of different ways.
08:42Lack of confidence can definitely show up into being a bully.
08:46You're like, I'm going to pick on people.
08:47All I'm going to do with my life is pick on other people
08:49because I don't want to deal with the fact that I don't like myself.
08:54I don't want to deal with the fact that I have no confidence
08:56or that I don't think that I'm a great person.
08:58So what I'm going to do is outsource my energy
09:00and I'm going to try to make everybody else see all the other bad people in the world.
09:05That is 100% a nasty smelling stinky aura.
09:11If all you do is this person and that person and that person,
09:15what about you?
09:17What about you?
09:18Nobody likes those kind of people
09:20because deep lying underneath the surface is you not being confident in you.
09:26You have no self-esteem.
09:30The thing is, you will push away the things that are meant for you in your life
09:36by you not being confident.
09:38Who wants a person who just thinks terribly?
09:43I heard this deep quote the other day and it was like,
09:46there are some men that take it, and I'm not a man hater.
09:49I love men, by the way.
09:50All my men on my YouTube channel, I love you guys to death.
09:53I'm not a man hater.
09:54I'm just using this as an example.
09:56But a lot of people, I heard a quote that said like,
10:00men can, or bad men sometimes, will smell on a woman,
10:07oh, she has terrible confidence, and you're the perfect person to go after
10:10because they can get you to do whatever they want you to do.
10:13They know you ain't going to leave them.
10:14They know you'll put up with bad treatment
10:16because they know you don't have any confidence.
10:19You ain't going nowhere.
10:20You ain't leaving.
10:21They can treat you however they want to treat you.
10:23Where are you going?
10:24Where a confident woman or a confident person is very dangerous
10:27because they don't need you.
10:28They don't need your approval.
10:30They don't need your presence.
10:31They don't need anything from you.
10:34They're getting all that from inside themselves.
10:36That is a dangerous person
10:37because that's a person who doesn't need anything to happen.
10:41They know who they are.
10:42And by being this confident kind of person,
10:45you're going to attract everything in life.
10:48I'm telling you, you are.
10:50When you're confident, things work out for you
10:54because you've already decided on the inside
10:56that you're not going to outsource your focus.
11:01You're not going to outsource your grind.
11:04You're not going to outsource your validation.
11:06You're not going to sit and wait for somebody to approve
11:09and esteem you.
11:12I mean, what is not going to happen for that kind of person?
11:16And confidence.
11:18I read this about Coco Chanel.
11:20Coco Chanel, the owner, the creator of the brand Chanel
11:24that is still a booming, amazing business to this day.
11:29Coco Chanel, everybody said that she wasn't that pretty.
11:32Like she really, she even knew that she wasn't that pretty.
11:37She wasn't that gorgeous.
11:38She wasn't, she didn't have really a sexy body.
11:41Everyone said that she had more of like a manly way about her.
11:44But the girl's confidence was on Jupiter.
11:50Her confidence was out of this freaking world.
11:56Everything she did, everyone wanted to be like her.
11:59It doesn't matter how she would wear her hat,
12:03how she would wear her clothes.
12:04She would wear these different perfumes.
12:06Everybody wanted to be like Coco Chanel.
12:09Everybody and all the men wanted her.
12:11She got any man she wanted because her confidence was enormous.
12:17And another thing that confidence does is it doesn't need a certain outcome.
12:23Does that make sense?
12:25It doesn't need this person to like me,
12:29that person to like me,
12:30this thing to work out, that thing to work out.
12:32Confidence says something's going to work out because I know who I am.
12:36And it doesn't try to mimic and imitate.
12:38One thing about Chanel is she did things differently.
12:41All the girls were dressing the same.
12:43All the girls were wearing the same clothes,
12:45the same hats, the same purses, the same shoes, the same perfume.
12:48She was different.
12:50Why was that attractive?
12:52The word confidence.
12:53We keep coming back to the word confidence.
12:55We keep coming back there.
12:57It is the most attractive thing,
13:00whether it's people or it's circumstances.
13:03They will work out because you're not trying to outsource your game plan in this life.
13:10You're not saying,
13:11I need these people to like me.
13:14I need this man.
13:15Uh-uh.
13:16I can't let him go.
13:17I need this and this and this and this thing.
13:19No, confidence is like,
13:20no, I know who I am and I'm going to stay focused
13:23because what I'm doing will work out.
13:25And honestly,
13:26you can't force what is for you.
13:29That is the title of this video.
13:30You know, forcing comes from lack of confidence.
13:34That's why I kind of harbored on confidence first.
13:38When you're trying to manipulate and keep people in your life
13:42and you hope this person likes you
13:43and you hope this person doesn't leave you
13:45and you hope these people who are like you and don't talk about you,
13:48that gives you a nasty scent.
13:51That gives you a nasty scent.
13:53We're talking about the smell, your aura.
13:55We're talking about something deeper than perfume.
13:58There's an aura about you.
14:00That everyone around you can smell.
14:04And that,
14:07I need this to work out.
14:09No, no, no, no, no.
14:10I can't control anything, but I'm trying to.
14:13That is so unattractive.
14:14And actually what you're going to do
14:15is you're going to push away the things that were meant for you.
14:19Whatever that thing is,
14:20you're going to push it away.
14:22You're never going to get it.
14:24Because you've got that nasty cologne or that nasty perfume that everybody can smell.
14:31It's pushing away the things that are for you.
14:33It's sopping up your energy.
14:35It's sopping up your focus.
14:37It's sopping up the optimism and the tenacity that you need to get where you need to go.
14:42But the thing is,
14:44what's for you is going to happen with that confidence.
14:49A lot of people like to say,
14:50Oh, you can't mess up good plans for your life.
14:53No, you can.
14:54You absolutely can.
14:56You absolutely can.
14:58Think about Solomon.
14:59Think about David.
15:01Think about Samson.
15:02Think about all these people in the Bible that
15:04would not just chill and trust God.
15:07And they are like,
15:08let me take matters into my own hands.
15:10Think about Sarah.
15:12Every time us humans,
15:13we try to take things in our own hand
15:15and not just let God do God
15:17and us focus on self-improvement.
15:20Okay.
15:21Let me boil this video down.
15:24If you worry about self-improvement and that's it,
15:27how can you be a better you every day?
15:30Physically,
15:30how can you eat better?
15:31How can you look better?
15:32Because it all matters.
15:33A lot of people say,
15:34look, it matters.
15:36How can you treat people better?
15:37How can you move better?
15:38How can you focus more on your goals?
15:41How can you improve?
15:43I'm telling you,
15:45everything will align in your life.
15:47I'm telling you.
15:49But what do we do?
15:50We don't do that.
15:51No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
15:53We don't believe in ourselves.
15:54So we try to manipulate.
15:56We try to hate on others.
15:57We get jealous.
15:59We focus.
16:00We have no focus.
16:02We have no discipline.
16:06You don't have to force what's for you,
16:07you guys.
16:08It will come with a nice,
16:14heavy serving of confidence.
16:16Confidence doesn't mean cocky.
16:18Cocky, that's a whole different thing.
16:19So yeah,
16:20just wanted to say that I would have saved myself so much trouble in my life if I
16:23stopped trying to force things.
16:25It doesn't work anyways.
16:26You're going to waste your time.
16:28You're going to waste your time.
16:29You don't have to force what's for you.
16:31Whether it's a dream,
16:32a position,
16:33a man,
16:33a woman,
16:34your dream man,
16:35your dream woman,
16:35your dream job,
16:36your dream position.
16:37You don't have to force it if it's for you.
16:41You work on self-improvement.
16:42All these things will align.
16:44I promise you they align themselves.
16:48You don't even have to worry about them.
16:50The things that are meant for you will just line up for you.
16:55I'm a living witness.
16:56I promise you.
16:58And then it's like you go,
17:00oh my gosh,
17:01all I had to do this whole time was focus on myself.
17:04Not selfish,
17:05not being selfish,
17:06but not outsourcing your self-esteem,
17:11your focus,
17:12your discipline,
17:13your self-improvement.
17:14Self-improvement is everything.
17:15And you don't have to worry about anybody staying in your life.
17:18The right ones will stay.
17:19The right ones will come.
17:20The right ones.
17:21But yeah,
17:22people are going to not like you.
17:23Like that's life.
17:24But the right ones will stay.
17:26The right ones will believe in you.
17:27The right ones will come to you.
17:28Even if you have to be in a single season where you're like,
17:31man,
17:32I don't really have anyone believing in me right now,
17:33but I know the right people will come.
17:35They will.
17:37You will attract it.
17:38I promise you.
17:39And it has nothing to do with the law of attraction.
17:41Just how life works.
17:43So that's what I wanted to share with you today.
17:45Stop worrying.
17:45Stop trying to force people to stay.
17:47Don't do it.
17:48It doesn't work.
17:49I promise you trying to force people to stay and force people to like you,
17:52force people to understand you,
17:53force people to believe in you,
17:55force...
17:55No,
17:56it doesn't work.
17:57Give up right now and say,
17:59you know what?
18:01I believe in me right now.
18:04If I'm the only person that believes in me,
18:05I'm the only person who thinks that I got it going on.
18:08They're going to come.
18:09They will.
18:11The people that do,
18:12they will come.
18:13And you'll get what you desire,
18:15but not from force.
18:17You'll get it from you learning how to focus.
18:22So anyways,
18:23that's my little tidbit today.
18:24I love you guys so much.
18:27I'm going to be here every day for the next 45 days.
18:30Encouraging you.
18:31We're going to do some videos outside too.
18:32I've been doing all these videos in the living room.
18:34We're going to go outside and film some of these too.
18:36I love you guys so much.
18:37If you can donate to my mission
18:39and visit all the countries in the world,
18:42I'll put the link to my GoFundMe in the description box.
18:45If not,
18:46if you could just share this video with somebody
18:47who needs to hear it,
18:48amazing.
18:49Tell them there's this girl Mary Jane on YouTube.
18:51Tell them to subscribe.
18:52That would be awesome too.
18:54And I love you guys.
18:55I'll see you guys so much.
18:56I'll see you guys.
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