- 10 hours ago
Comic Relief S2026E04 More Funny For Money
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TVTranscript
00:01Hello, you. It's me again!
00:03Yes, you thought I'd retired.
00:05I had plans, lovely ones,
00:07which mostly involved lying on a beach with a wrong punch.
00:11But then the country went, and I'll put this politely,
00:14full bonkers!
00:16I'll get back to the shop and everyone's up on each other's grill, right?
00:18Taking sides, north v south, blues v reds, low v high,
00:22people live-streaming themselves, walking to the bin,
00:25conspiracy podcasts about chickens.
00:27We can't win.
00:28The truth is, all of us are finding life challenging at the moment.
00:31Let's face it, the news isn't brilliant.
00:35Sorry, but here's what's amazing about us.
00:38We know how to come together when it counts,
00:40not just by forming an orderly queue,
00:42although, to be honest, we do love a queue,
00:45but by picking each other up, not picking sides.
00:48When it really matters, we stick together and stick on one of these bad boys
00:51and joyfully make complete fools of ourselves for money!
00:54Because behind the wigs, the sketches, the dodgy dancing,
00:59we know we can make real change.
01:01That's food on someone's table.
01:02A safe place to sleep, support, protection, hope.
01:06The not funny stuff we all depend on.
01:09And all of it, all of it, my friends, made possible
01:11because someone somewhere decided to run a marathon in a mankini.
01:16And that, my friends, is the definition of a truly united kingdom.
01:20It's you, yes you, who year after year come together
01:23for incredible nights like tonight to be funny, raise money and change lives.
01:28Which for a dude like me, could just be the best punchline ever.
01:33I am so sorry, sorry.
01:35Can we get a camera, Doctor, please?
01:37Can we roll VT?
01:38Davina, help!
01:41I've got you, Lenny.
01:42Welcome to a very special edition of the Best Bits from Comic Relief 2026,
01:46where we look back at a magical night of fun, fundraising and epic challenges.
01:52Here's what's to come on the show.
01:54Stand by as Dermot and Alison find a creative way to raise money for Comic Relief.
01:58If it makes you feel any better, it's all going to a very good cause.
02:03There's confusion in hit sitcom Amanda Land.
02:06Oh, Amanda's.
02:07Ah!
02:10We celebrate Greg James completing his epic tandem challenge.
02:14Sarah Cox's challenge is harder.
02:16Hey!
02:17And treacherous antics in The Traitors, the movie, the sequel.
02:22Oh!
02:23I am wearing a red cloak because I...
02:26You're the secret traitor.
02:27Oh, you're really spoiled that.
02:30Plus Coldplay unveil their plans for Game of Thrones, the musical.
02:34Thank you, John Snow.
02:35This kid.
02:37Thank you, kid Snow.
02:38That's all to come on Comic Relief, more funny for money.
02:41And your hosts for this afternoon's highlights from the big night.
02:45It's only LaVoie and Jill Scott.
02:47Aw, thanks, Davina, and welcome, welcome, welcome!
02:51It's nice to be with you, Jill.
02:53And you, LaVoie.
02:54And don't tell my good friend Karen Carney, but I was voting for you for Strictly.
02:58I knew it.
02:59And look at us.
03:00We are bringing the sparkle to Comic Relief.
03:01You look amazing!
03:02You look great.
03:03You really do.
03:04This is Comic Relief, more funny for money.
03:06And we are here to relive some of the best moments from Friday's epic fundraising show.
03:12Now, there are so many highlights to choose from, but we haven't got all day.
03:16So, Jill got brutal with her selections.
03:18What's up first, Jill?
03:20Well, kicking us off is the one and only Nan, who opened the show with a good old fashioned
03:25knees up to a Queen classic.
03:27Brilliant.
03:28Could you not wait to do the sweeping?
03:29We're filming for the BBC.
03:31I just can't get the staff.
03:36Tonight, I'm gonna have myself a real good time.
03:43I feel alive.
03:49And the world will turn it inside out.
03:57I'm floating around in ecstasy.
04:07So, don't stop me now.
04:13Don't stop me.
04:15Cause I'm having a good time.
04:17I'm having a good time.
04:18I'm a singing star leaping from the sky.
04:21Not a sighted by the laws of gravity.
04:26Here we go.
04:27I'm a racing car.
04:28Pass it by like, lady, cadaver.
04:31I'm gonna go, go, go.
04:34There's no stopping me.
04:36I'm burning through the sky.
04:39Yeah!
04:40200 degrees.
04:41That's why they call me Mrs. Ferdin'.
04:44Hey!
04:45I'm travelling at the speed of light.
04:47I wanna make the supersonic.
04:53I'm having a good time.
04:53Don't stop me.
04:53Don't stop me.
04:54Don't stop me.
04:55Don't stop me.
04:56Don't stop me.
04:57Don't stop me.
04:58Don't stop me.
04:58Oh, oh, oh.
04:59Don't stop me.
05:03Don't stop me.
05:04Don't stop me.
05:06Have a good time.
05:06Don't stop me.
05:07Don't stop me.
05:08Don't stop me now.
05:09I'm having such a good time.
05:11I'm having a ball.
05:13Don't stop me now.
05:15And if you want to have a good time, just give me a call.
05:19Don't stop me, cos I'm having a good time.
05:23Don't stop me, cos I'm having a good time.
05:26Don't want to stop at all.
05:35CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
05:37Wow.
05:39Next up, it's the turn of national telly treasures Dermot O'Leary
05:43and Alison Hammond, who recently visited a local bank
05:47hoping to raise a lot of money for Comic Relief.
05:57Hi, I'm Alison Hammond.
05:58And I'm Dermot O'Leary.
05:59Now, Comic Relief has always been a cause close to our hearts.
06:03So today we've come to this bank in central London,
06:05where, with the help of their amazing staff and customers,
06:07we hope to raise an awful lot of money.
06:10So, let's go meet them.
06:13Yes, absolutely. Take one of them. Have a good day.
06:24Everybody on the ground now!
06:26You heard him!
06:27On the ground! Now!
06:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
06:37Let's all remain calm, people.
06:40Yo, fill this up.
06:45I'm down. I'm down.
06:47We're just here for the money.
06:51Seriously, no-one try and be a hero.
06:54Thank you all for your cooperation.
06:56If it makes you feel any better, it's all going to a very good cause.
07:02Nobody move!
07:03You do what I say and no-one gets hurt.
07:06Sorry, what do you think you're doing?
07:07What do you think you're doing?
07:08Well, we ask first.
07:09Wait.
07:11I know that voice.
07:13Take off your masks.
07:17Alison Hammond and Dermot O'Leary.
07:20It's me.
07:21Sean McGarty.
07:23What are you doing here?
07:25I'm trying to raise money for Comic Relief, inn't I?
07:27They said to me, do you want to climb Kilimanjaro?
07:29I said, are you all right?
07:30I've been in the jungle eating fish bums.
07:31No, thanks.
07:31They wanted us to swim to the Isle of Man.
07:34I was like, no way.
07:35Dermot can't even swim.
07:37I can swim.
07:38Choose not to.
07:40But anyway, listen.
07:41You can't rob this bank, because we were here first.
07:43Well, what am I supposed to do?
07:45It's nearly closing time.
07:46I ain't going to find another bank, am I?
07:47It's not our problem.
07:50Give me your money, then.
07:55Do you know something?
07:56I don't think that's a real gun.
07:58Yeah, all right.
08:01It's a baguette.
08:02Don't worry.
08:03Dermot's isn't real, either.
08:05Water pistol.
08:06Mum got it for my 50th.
08:07Milk.
08:09But anyway, listen.
08:10What we'll do is we'll split the money between the three of us,
08:13and then we'll donate it to Comic Relief.
08:15Right.
08:16Not so fast!
08:18This is a stick-up!
08:20Give me all the money now!
08:23Wait.
08:24Is that you, Chris McCausland?
08:26How did you know?
08:27You haven't, um...
08:28You haven't been with any eye holes?
08:32Oh, yeah.
08:33Plus, you've got your BBC pass.
08:36Oh, damn!
08:37And your gun's a pepper grinder.
08:39Listen, don't you think I don't know who you are?
08:41I've got an ear for voices.
08:44Richard Madeley.
08:45Chris, that's not Richard.
08:47Wow, Adele, what are you doing here?
08:49There's three of us here already.
08:50Yeah, I know there is, Dame Judi Dench.
08:55Look, I'm just trying to do my little bit for Comic Relief.
08:58Chris, I hope you don't mind me asking.
09:00It's one thing we're going to restrict me,
09:01but how do you successfully expect to rob a bank?
09:03Well, it was either do this bit or be the getaway driver.
09:06Well, fair enough.
09:07Makes sense, doesn't it?
09:08Nobody move!
09:10Everybody underground!
09:11This is a robbery!
09:13What now?
09:14Oh, hi, guys.
09:16Here we are.
09:18Really?
09:19It's me, Stephen.
09:21It's an honour to have you here, Mr Spielberg.
09:24No, Stephen Mulhern.
09:26TV's catchphrase.
09:28Deal or no deal?
09:30Three days at four.
09:32I love that show.
09:33Shut it!
09:35No, officer, it's not a joke.
09:37Alison Hammond and Dermot O'Leary,
09:39and now Stephen Mulhern.
09:41Yes, the one from Deal or no deal weekdays at four.
09:43Come quick!
09:44OK, guys, let's split the cash,
09:47but before we do,
09:48is there anyone else planning to rob this bank?
09:52Guys, you may as well just come out now.
09:56Sorry we're late.
09:57Got the wrong bus.
09:59Hiya.
10:00All right.
10:01We bought sandwiches.
10:02Natalie Cassidy and...
10:04Nico Milano.
10:05And who are you?
10:06Really?
10:07Sabre the gladiator.
10:09Right, now we've all been introduced,
10:11give us a dosh or I'll blast ya.
10:17With my trumpet.
10:25Oh, Dermot, make it stop.
10:27Give me the cash.
10:28Hey, you said we'd split it, you traitor.
10:30Uh, ain't you the traitor?
10:32No, I'm a YouTuber,
10:33and my PR wanted me to make that very clear.
10:35Listen to me.
10:36We're not round the round table now.
10:38We were outside.
10:39I can't believe you don't even want to deal or no deal.
10:40You're a little.
10:41No, don't, yo, don't.
10:42You dare, yo, don't.
10:43Please don't.
10:44Quiet!
10:46OK, we're going to split the lot between the eight of us.
10:48Agreed?
10:48I guess.
10:49How much is that each?
10:50Well, if I cut the sandwiches into triangles,
10:52I guess we've got enough to go around.
10:53I only like cheese.
10:54I've got pepper.
10:55I meant the money.
10:56How much money is that each?
10:58Well, it's about...
11:01Oh, that'll never come out, will it?
11:04Woo!
11:07I'll get nicked again.
11:11We messed up.
11:13Please give what you can.
11:14The red postage.
11:15Ow!
11:16I'm a celebrity.
11:17Get me out of these cars.
11:18Let's go.
11:19Don't believe it.
11:20Ariana Grande.
11:21What a day.
11:22You said this would be easier than swimming to the island, man.
11:25I know.
11:26Because I can't swim.
11:31All right, all right.
11:32Calm down, calm down.
11:33John Luthor's here.
11:35Robbery's over.
11:37You'll be happy to know that the idiots who tried to rob this bank,
11:40well, they're going to serve 10 to 15 years in a slammer.
11:44Which is silly, really, because they could have easily got away of it.
11:48Right!
11:49Everyone, down on the floor now.
11:54Look, Comic Relief are going to have me cycle to Aberdeen.
11:58No, thanks.
11:58And plus, these overcoats are not cheap.
12:00So don't judge me.
12:02Oh, and happy Red Nose Day.
12:04Right!
12:05Open the safe, you!
12:06Open the safe!
12:09Now, for all the laughs we have on Red Nose Day,
12:12it's all for an important reason.
12:14To support people to be able to eat, sleep and feel safe in the UK and abroad.
12:20For so many, the cost of living is putting extreme pressure on household budgets.
12:25And, for those dependent on their pension, the impact can be devastating.
12:31In this next film, we want to tell you about Stephen.
12:34Here's his story.
12:36Brought to life by an actor.
12:43She was a lovely dancer.
12:46She was the first one on the dance floor and the last one off.
12:59we got married 6th of june 1964 it was such a wonderful day i loved it to pieces i'd seen
13:10hard times seen good times go to skegness island man scarborough went all over oh fantastic times
13:19how could our farewell mean as much as our time she was only ill for six months that you leave
13:29behind
13:32i stayed with her till the last day but i lost her 17 years ago
13:40it was a terrible thing you just miss them i used to love them on anything
13:46i was very lonely i just sat in the house day and night it's heartbreaking i could sit there and
13:56cried when you're getting old nobody really wants to know you
14:04i was struggling money didn't go very far utile living on the pension food in the shop are very
14:12expensive it's gone mostly this last couple of months even small items like bread i don't get
14:20the best get the cheapest since i found out about the lighthouse project it's just made me a lot
14:28happier person it's nice to come in meet people have company
14:35to love and no love in return the pantry the lighthouse is for people who are hungry
14:45when i didn't have enough money i used to come down and get food
14:51i've worked all my life it's hard to ask for help
14:58once i'm involved we have a fabulous tea disco
15:04people ask me can you jive i said yes
15:10full of aches and pains but i love to get up and dance
15:14oh it brings back memories brilliant memories
15:19pauline still miss her to this day
15:23when you love somebody then you lose them it's hard
15:28really hard
15:30to love and no love in return
15:45somebody said you got a new friend
15:53does she love you better than i can
16:01and there's a big black sky over my tongue
16:09and i know where you're at i bet she's around
16:18and yeah i know it's stupid but i just gotta see it for myself
16:27and i'm in the corner watching you kiss
16:31and i'm right over here but why can't you see me
16:51and i keep dancing on my arm now
16:59so far away but still show me the light's coming
17:06The music dies
17:09But you don't see me
17:11Standing here
17:13I just came
17:15To say goodbye
17:17I'm in the corner
17:19Watching you kiss her
17:22Oh
17:25I'm giving it my all
17:28But I'm not the guy
17:30You're taking home
17:32Ooh
17:33And I keep dancing
17:36On my own
17:38Yeah
17:42So far away
17:44But still so near
17:46The lights come up
17:49The music dies
17:51But you don't see me
17:56Standing here
18:08Thanks to Callum Scott
18:10For that beautiful performance
18:11And thank you to Stephen
18:13And his family
18:14For allowing us
18:15To tell his story
18:16We know times are tough
18:18And we're grateful
18:18For whatever you can give
18:20As your donations
18:20Really do help
18:22To make a difference
18:22And it's really simple
18:24To donate
18:24Here to tell you
18:25Exactly how
18:26Is the brilliant cast
18:27Of The Play That Goes Wrong
18:29Hopefully
18:30Getting all the donation
18:31Details right
18:32Good luck
18:38Good evening
18:39You join us
18:40On the set
18:40Of The Play That Goes Wrong
18:41Where the cast
18:42Are here to tell you
18:43Just how easy it is
18:44To give to comic relief
18:45Tonight
18:48Chris we're not ready yet
18:51To donate
18:5240
18:5230
18:5320
18:53Or 10 pounds
18:56Text the word
18:5740
18:5830
18:5820
18:59Or 10
19:00To
19:0170
19:0270
19:0270
19:0370
19:0302
19:04Text will cost
19:05Your donation amount
19:06Plus your standard
19:07Network message charge
19:08100% of your donation
19:10Will go to the
19:11Registered Charity
19:11Comic Relief
19:13Cheers
19:17You must be 16 years
19:19Or older
19:19And please ask
19:21The bill pays permission
19:23or you can donate any amount online at bbc.co.uk forward slash rednoseday
19:32which is where you will also find full terms and conditions
19:43or use the QR code which which takes you straight to the
19:49comic relief donations page
19:57you can also call 03457 910 910
20:05standard geographic geographic
20:09standard geographic charges for landlines and mobiles will apply
20:13or donate
20:16or donate via a check made payable to rednoseday2026
20:26and send it to rednoseday2026
20:30p.o. box 12635 colchester co7 5a n
20:53thanks to the amazing cast of the play that goes wrong
20:57now listen the actors use specially designed fake props
21:00and are professionally trained in the art of tomfoolery
21:04so don't try anything you've just seen at home
21:06especially taking a swig from a bottle marked with a warning
21:10and a skull and crossbones label
21:11and please remember say yes to gift aid if eligible
21:15here's a lesson on why it's important
21:17from Miss McCall and her star pupil Lauren
21:28hello are you Lauren are you Davina McCall
21:35you look like Davina McCall are you Davina McCall me
21:41yes I'm Davina McCall
21:43all right
21:46do you know what I'm here to talk to you about today
21:50is it your menopause
21:58no it's not that
22:01then no
22:03actually it's about gift aid
22:05you know comic relief's rednoseday
22:07that's in November
22:08no that's children in need
22:11no one knows the difference Miss
22:12I think they do
22:14and no one cares
22:16Britain's broken Miss
22:18Britain's broken
22:211.869 million unemployed to be exact Miss
22:25who's got time for the one I bath
22:27I think you're being unnecessarily pugnacious
22:35thank you
22:38look can we get back to what we were talking about
22:40can I ask you a question
22:41yeah
22:42I just want to ask you a question
22:44can I ask you a question
22:46ask me a question
22:48have you found my long lost family
22:58Lauren
22:58how have you found them me
23:01my family are long and they're lost
23:04miss I need my letter
23:06I need my letter on my cup of tea
23:09please miss
23:09miss have you found my DNA Mac
23:12miss am I a twin
23:14am I a twin miss
23:15oh my god are you my real mum
23:18are you my real mum though
23:19oh no miss I ain't gonna exercise
23:20that is enough Lauren
23:23enough
23:23honestly this is ridiculously churlish
23:26this behaviour is unacceptable
23:28I cannot imagine
23:29that your parents are proud right now
23:34are you disrespecting my long lost family
23:38do you know what I thought for once
23:40for once
23:41you could do something for others
23:43it was just a small ask
23:44to get the word out about gift aid
23:47but clearly you're incapable of doing anything for others
23:50and if you don't change
23:52you're going to be on a one way street
23:54to nowhere
24:03I'm above it
24:09I'm above it though
24:10but I don't even care if I ain't even bothered
24:12look at my face
24:13right look at my face
24:14right are you looking at my face
24:16right is there any part of it bothered
24:17no
24:18because I ain't bothered
24:20look face bothered miss
24:22I don't care
24:22my family ain't even lost
24:25look face bothered I don't care
24:27look face bothered gift aid
24:29who cares
24:30ain't bothered
24:30Davina
24:31this is Davina
24:32you are live on channel 4
24:34please do not swear
24:36look face bothered
24:38pussy
24:38who cares
24:41miss
24:42I ain't
24:44bothered
24:44bovins
24:48give date
24:48you
24:51if you are a UK taxpayer
24:53saying yes to gift aid
24:55let's charities claim extra money from the government
24:57it costs you nothing
24:58but gives the charity 25% more
25:01forgetting to tick the box when you donate
25:04can add up to millions missed for comic relief
25:06If so, do not forget to do just that.
25:08Tents and conditions apply!
25:10CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
25:13Thank you, McCullough!
25:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
25:19Over to that old man off-the-masked singer who thinks he's shit.
25:26LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
25:37Now, one of my personal highlights from Friday night
25:40was watching Nick Muhammad and Joe Mahler relive their time
25:43on Celebrity Traitors.
25:45Oh, I love that. What an incredible series.
25:47But I could never behave like any of them, you know.
25:49I believe in sportmanship and integrity and loyalty.
25:52This is not the time to relive your dating profile, Lavoie.
25:56This is the time to relive the Traitors, the movie, the sequel.
25:59Oh, that's what it is. I thought I was doing Yoda.
26:04Amazing Fringe Productions presents...
26:08The Traitors.
26:09The movie.
26:11The sequel.
26:13Starring Vicki Patterson as Rachel.
26:16Ian Sterling as Steven.
26:18And Alison Steadman as Fiona.
26:22By the order of the Traitors, you have been murdered.
26:27Introducing Amanda Redmond as Amanda.
26:30I'm an ex-police officer, so I never miss a trick.
26:35Jessica Hines as crime writer Harriet.
26:38You should have killed me when you had the chance.
26:40Directed by award-winning genius Ruby Wax.
26:44Cracking shot, mega pan, drone, zoom, lower the gym.
26:49Yeah, I don't really know what I'm talking about,
26:51but I love blowing into this thing.
26:53Featuring Anna Friel as Claudia Winkleman.
26:56Fingless wool and gloves.
26:58Check.
26:59Stylish roll-neck sweater.
27:01Check.
27:02Sophisticated jacket in Highland.
27:03Check.
27:05Check.
27:07Experience the drama of the round table.
27:11With Scott Mills as James.
27:14And Fleur East as Roxy.
27:16Well, I haven't got a clue who it could be.
27:18Sorry, James, can you speak up?
27:20That shirt's so loud I can't hear you.
27:22I said I haven't got a clue who any of them are.
27:24Sorry, we still can't hear you.
27:27Come in, Mum.
27:28Shh.
27:28I mean, Judy, definitely not Mum.
27:31Well, I'd like to say something about Stephen.
27:34He could never be a traitor.
27:36I mean, just look at him.
27:39I agree.
27:40Introducing Lewis Cope as Jack.
27:43Stephen's my best mate in here,
27:44and if he were a traitor, I would definitely know.
27:50See how alliances are made.
27:52So we're agreed.
27:53Partners till the very end.
27:55Don't mess with me.
27:56I was trained by the FBI.
27:58Wow, that's amazing.
27:59And don't worry, I won't double-cross you
28:01for the sake of a dramatic ending.
28:04Cooey!
28:06I can tell you're surprised.
28:08But I let you into a little secret.
28:11I am wearing a red cloak,
28:14cos I...
28:14You're the secret traitor.
28:16Oh, you really spoiled that.
28:17Cut!
28:18Reset for close-up, please.
28:19I'm really sure Alison Steadman is right to play me.
28:23I'm just not feeling it.
28:25I love Vicki Patterson,
28:27but I'm also worried she's been a bit miscast as me.
28:29She keeps slipping into a strong Geordie accent.
28:32Aw, how are you, man? I didn't say that.
28:34I sound just like you and you're nice.
28:36I don't think Ian Sterling's right to play me.
28:39Excuse me?
28:40Sorry, I just imagined someone a wee bit fitter.
28:43Fair enough.
28:45The problem is I'm actually keeping two secrets.
28:49One, I'm a traitor.
28:50And two,
28:53my collar gets bigger every time I tell a lie.
28:56I think Rachel's a traitor.
28:58She's not.
28:59And I should know, cos, eh...
29:02Never mind.
29:03It's an absolute nightmare.
29:05I think Stephen might be a traitor.
29:07I am not a traitor.
29:09How dare you, actually?
29:11Maybe they won't notice.
29:13I promise you I am not a traitor.
29:16Someone is in this very room.
29:20OK, let's settle this once and for all.
29:22As a crime writer, just banish me and I'll stand up there and tell you all I am faithful.
29:30The time for talking is over.
29:32And I'm standing still, so the time for walking is over.
29:35And I've just finished eating my lunch with this handy spoon and fork combination.
29:42So the time for sporking is over.
29:45Harriet, are you a traitor?
29:53I am and always have been a faith healer.
30:05I am and always have been a faith healer.
30:08It's just a little thing I do on the side just to make a few quid.
30:10I am and always have been a train.
30:19Let me finish.
30:22A train spotter.
30:24I like trains.
30:25I am and always have been a faithless fam.
30:32I can't get no sleep.
30:34I love a bit of faithless.
30:35Enough!
30:36She's a bloody faithful.
30:38OK?
30:39Can we please get on?
30:41Rachel, I'm going to throw you under the bus and tell everyone that you're actually a traitor.
30:47What?
30:49You.
30:50You.
30:51I warned you.
30:52Never mess with a woman who's once read an e-book written by a man who's nearly seen all of
30:57Silence of the Lambs.
30:58I've got something else to tell you.
30:59Not everyone is what they seem.
31:02I was a senior detective in the police force.
31:06Judy is my mum.
31:08Ellie is my girlfriend.
31:11And these aren't even real sideburns.
31:14And I am your father.
31:18Sorry, that's my throat.
31:20And I am your father.
31:22Much better.
31:23No.
31:23Yeah.
31:24No.
31:25I am.
31:26Aye.
31:27Now you see, your face does ring a bell.
31:30Give us a hug.
31:35I'm sorry, but if he's meant to be my dad, do you not think this music's a little bit on
31:39the romantic side?
31:40Just go with her.
31:41It's for charity.
31:44Oh, hiya, you two.
31:45Nice to see you.
31:47Oh, no, what are you doing?
31:49Oh!
31:50No, not the face.
31:58And here ends the tale of treachery, deceit and very questionable acting.
32:04And the model of this story?
32:06Don't ever mess with the real traitors.
32:20You're watching Comic Relief More Funny For Money.
32:23And it's your second chance to see all the best bits from Red Nose Day.
32:27And another chance to get your hands on a mega prize.
32:30And with a joking joke.
32:32Listen, when I saw this offer, I nearly lost my eyelashes.
32:34Seriously.
32:35But then I realised, it's not about me.
32:36It's about the cause.
32:38And I'm talking about winning tickets to see Harry Styles live at Wembley Stadium on Friday the 12th of June.
32:44These are golden tickets.
32:46You could be in with the chance of winning not one, not two, but six tickets to watch the music
32:52icon perform in the gig of the year.
32:55We'll include travel and accommodation for your whole crew.
32:58And you'll get the full star treatment with hospitality at the venue.
33:03So to be in with the chance of winning this golden prize, here are all the important terms and conditions.
33:10OK, I'll let you have that one.
33:13For the chance to win and donate £10 to Comic Relief, text the word Harry to 81144.
33:19You'll be charged one standard rate message plus a donation of £10 to Comic Relief.
33:24You can opt out of the donation by replying cancel to your entry confirmation text within 60 minutes.
33:30You must be 18 or over and have the bill payer's permission to enter.
33:34For full terms, prize description and how to enter by post and online, visit bbc.co.uk forward slash rednoseday.
33:42Text and online entries close at 11.59pm on the 19th of April, 2026.
33:47And postal entry closes on the 24th of April, 2026.
33:51Please do not enter after this time, as your entry will not count, but you may still be charged.
33:57The winner will be notified by phone on the 6th of May, 2026.
34:03Now, for those of you who may have been living under a rock, you may not have known that Radio
34:08One's Greg James completed the longest ever celebrity bike ride for Comic Relief on Friday.
34:13He cycled a staggering 1,000 kilometres from Weymouth to Edinburgh and raised an eye-warting amount of money all
34:21on a tandem.
34:22What a hero!
34:23Here is how his challenge went down.
34:27Three, two, one!
34:30Today is day one of my longest ride.
34:33And I'm kicking it all off in Weymouth.
34:35You're not just doing this on any regular road bike.
34:38You're doing it on a tandem.
34:39Why are you doing it on a tandem?
34:42Hi, Greg.
34:43How are you doing?
34:44It's definitely a challenge.
34:45It's definitely difficult.
34:46And I've got seven days left.
34:49We're in Wales!
34:50A horse with a red nose.
34:52Oh, my God!
34:53That's next year's challenge.
34:54Joe Lycett is giving him a tour of Birmingham.
34:57Thanks so much.
34:58That's very kind.
34:59I'll go and get a pint in a minute.
35:00Sorry, no.
35:01I mean, I'll give it in the bucket.
35:02The total is currently about 210,000.
35:05What?
35:05Is it?
35:05Oh, did you not know that?
35:07No way!
35:09Oh, yeah, it's the bloke from Radio One.
35:11Oh, my God!
35:12Is that Prince William?
35:14I wasn't going to bring your dad up, but I hope he's all right.
35:16Yeah, my dad's not in a great way.
35:18Well, you know he's so proud of you.
35:20We're all thinking of you as you're doing this.
35:21I can tell you've raised £1,020,000.
35:24Nowhere of a million!
35:25Yeah.
35:26No way!
35:27This is a bit of a wake-up call today.
35:30My God, it's early.
35:31I'm in a world of pain.
35:33It's two million now.
35:35No!
35:36Let's go!
35:37Come on!
35:38All right, I got you.
35:39A little dose of Jamie Lang in your day.
35:41Here he is, Tom again!
35:43An emotional reunion!
35:46Very, very special eight days,
35:48that I've really, really needed.
35:52Weymouth to Edinburgh.
35:53What a stupid idea!
35:55We did it!
35:57Get the anti-case cream on standby, please.
36:00Give us a huge hero's welcome to an incredible man.
36:04It's Radio 1's Drake James, everyone!
36:28I can't believe you're here!
36:31I'm so happy to see you!
36:33You know, how are you feeling?
36:36I feel very happy to be here.
36:38I feel very confused, because I woke up on the Scottish borders.
36:41I've then, this morning at four o'clock, I've started cycling to Edinburgh.
36:45I then finished in Edinburgh, and now I'm in Salford.
36:49Incredible.
36:49And I'm seeing you, and I'm seeing everyone here, and I'm just,
36:51I'm overjoyed with how much money we raise with this thing,
36:54and how joyful we managed to make the tandem adventure.
36:59You know what was amazing was, when you say the word joyful,
37:02seeing all those kids, I mean, every, everywhere you went,
37:06and then being joined.
37:08I mean, Prince William, please, what was that like?
37:11A complete surprise.
37:12So I was, I was shouted at in my ear.
37:15They said, turn off the road into the car park,
37:17and we were in a truck stop, and by a car,
37:20Prince William was just standing there.
37:23And that's the first time any of us knew about it,
37:25because it was top secret, and he was there,
37:27and he was holding a helmet, and then I said,
37:30have you got your own bike?
37:31And he went, no, no, I'm going to get on yours.
37:34And I've never held on more tightly.
37:39Can you imagine what would have happened to me
37:41if he'd have fallen off?
37:43That would have been the end.
37:45Maybe the end of Comet Relief.
37:48Are you ready to hear how much you have raised?
37:51Yes.
37:52For Comet Relief.
37:53I've heard a few totals, but...
37:55OK.
37:56Can I have another one?
37:58Fancy another one?
37:59Yes!
38:00That's all I wanted from tonight.
38:01Greg, your total is...
38:05Four million, two hundred and twenty-five thousand pounds,
38:09nine hundred and thirty-nine pounds!
38:11Open up!
38:12Open up, open up!
38:14Wow!
38:16Four million, two hundred and twenty-five thousand,
38:20nine hundred and thirty-nine pounds!
38:25Wasn't that great?
38:26OK, time now to remind ourselves why your donations
38:30are so important.
38:38HE LAUGHS
38:41HE LAUGHS
38:51HE LAUGHS
38:57HE LAUGHS
38:58HE LAUGHS
38:59HE LAUGHS
39:01HE LAUGHS
39:03HE LAUGHS
39:03HE LAUGHS
39:03HE LAUGHS
39:04HE LAUGHS
39:04HE LAUGHS
39:04HE LAUGHS
39:04HE LAUGHS
39:05HE LAUGHS
39:06HE LAUGHS
39:06HE LAUGHS
39:10This is the Harabeq refugee settlement.
39:13We have refugees from South Sudan,
39:15and they fled because there was a war.
39:19This is one of our partner schools that we are supporting.
39:22My name is Tom.
39:24I work with African Partners for Child Poverty.
39:28I am a facilitator for this session where children are modeling.
39:33If you look at some of this, it speaks a lot.
39:37Mary modeled this tree.
39:39She says that this tree reminds her of South Sudan.
39:44Their homes were terrorized by the rebels,
39:47and they were sleeping in the bush for days without food, without water.
40:01This was a mother when they were escaping from their hideout,
40:06and she said that she was this very little child here following the mother.
40:11There are a lot of things that took place in South Sudan
40:13that they witnessed themselves as young children.
40:17So these are the family members and people in the neighborhood that the rebels killed.
40:25This is not the kind of life that a child is supposed to go through.
40:31When they come here in this school, this is not just about education.
40:35The session of drawing and molding helps us to identify the needs of each individual child,
40:42and we give them support.
40:44There are a lot of challenges that they are still facing,
40:47but there is still hope for happiness and for a brighter future.
40:52That's what the project does.
40:53We have to be learning more.
40:56There is so much we can go through.
41:01This was a great job.
41:01I did't know if we can get there before.
41:05We can give you.
41:10please give what you can to donate 40 30 20 or 10 pounds text the word 40 30 20 or
41:1810 to 70 702
41:20or call 03 457 9 10 9 10 or you can scan the qr code which will take you to
41:28the comic relief
41:28website where you can donate any amount you want online you'll also find the terms and conditions
41:35there now one of the big highlights of the evening was the return of the brilliant amanda land where
41:42for one night only it became the land of amandas
41:51this is so exciting i can't get enough cox sarah cox and please use her full name try to be
41:57cool
41:58this is a big deal for me i mean being asked onto national radio that can only mean one thing
42:08that producer got sick of your emails that my content's finally broken through to the mainstream
42:12and you know what i think people are responding to no authenticity yeah if anyone asks you're my pa
42:26my i've got amanda for you perfect thank you molly amanda so great to put a face to an email
42:33are you okay sorry i was expecting a different amanda barry for you oh
42:41oh you remember al my publicist hi i was in last week with amanda seyfried yeah yeah of course um
42:47hi
42:48al amanda hi amanda oh and you are no i'm amanda oh oh my god i feel sick so when
42:59i was booking an
43:00interview with national treasure amanda barry i asked siri to email her publicist al but when i
43:04said message amandas al what it seems to have heard is message amandas all how many amandas have
43:10you got in your dress book i am so sorry i'm late amanda land for you amanda amanda yes no
43:20i'm amanda
43:22sorry yeah there's been a bit of a mix hi and amanda byram amanda oh yes so fun yeah
43:39so this is entirely my bad and i will of course sorry got lost right of course amanda collier so
43:47i
43:47will of course ensure that all uh well the vast majority of you are invited back on but i'm sure
43:54you all understand well to be honest i don't want to speak for all the amandas here but it does
43:59feel
43:59a little bit disrespectful i mean i have just come all the way from soha south holston i work in
44:06property never heard it called that i just feel like you've got a room full of iconic women who
44:12deserve a little bit more than being told to go home okay what would you suggest well she's got a
44:18great idea maya um hmm okay fine if i'm going to interview alia let's start with barry or
44:32should we give him the order that we arrived you know let's go alphabetical we'll go alphabetical
44:37okay so we've got yeah right we've got byram yeah we've got collier amazing on traitors by the way
44:43so good yeah i was really good yeah and then we've got lamb um and then um um hughes so
44:51i think
44:51i should really be before i think it'll be fine it'll all work out just just back up look uh
44:56i will
44:56get to you if we've got time right oh sarah i am so sorry i'm late it's amanda holden oh
45:04amanda
45:04oh yeah they uh they messed up the booking okay i'm just gonna give my agent a quick ring
45:19oh i adore you and alan carr i love the whole will they won't they thing you've got going on
45:25there
45:25i just want to ask her a quick no no no no no sorry amanda just my pa is still
45:30being trained
45:31it's absolutely fine sorry i need to make a call yes absolutely um clearly the situation there is
45:37not exactly um well let's just say not all amanders were created equal if you know what i mean i
45:44know
45:44exactly what you mean right there are amanders and there are banders and um what if i said
45:51there might be a way for you and i to get a bigger bite of the microphone
46:00apple well the microphone apple
46:10must be so stressful so many amandas i have a similar problem in my house at christmas
46:17there's 11 paths in my family and another one on the way yeah more paths than patsfield
46:24as pat likes to say oh that's my cousin pat talking about big pat who is a dairy farmer
46:30and also a former ireland's strongest man okay tell me more oh um well
46:40okay so we're going to come to you guys at the end of the song well actually sarah sorry i
46:45was thinking
46:45there's four minutes six amandas i don't really think that reflects our profiles sorry what that's
46:52a really good point actually amanda i feel like i'm worth a bit more than 50 seconds right
46:59right you know what no one puts amandas in the corner you guys really need to get some windows in
47:13here i mean where do we go from too many amandas to no amandas at all i mean what are
47:18we gonna do we've
47:18we've got four minutes to fill
47:22i mean what did you do i mean what did you do i mean what did you do i mean
47:26what did you do
47:26well thank you my dad i'm not gonna say that i'm not gonna say that oh
47:29are you kidding me
47:37so he lifted ireland's second strongest man uh also called pat clean over his head so he
47:44actually broke uh another world record that he didn't even know about and what an incredible
47:50story uh we will be back with anda where he's straight after the news um and that's if you
47:54can stick around please oh yeah sure absolutely well i have you i've actually got this lifestyle
48:02brand called senu i was wondering a man that is brilliant i think we might have found the next
48:08terry wogan you put the ann in wogan yeah well that was jokes fancy some more laughs don't worry
48:20we've got you take a look at this i can't even hold the broom even mcintyre's done it
48:30there's a bloke fun hello let's do this
48:39thank you
48:42maybe they won't notice
48:44i mean maybe they won't notice
48:55it's not it's not going to take the weight this it's going to rip it that's going to rip that
48:58oh playdom
49:01hit you with the boobs
49:02you're going down
49:09i was trying so hard not to laugh
49:12people live streamed themselves walking to the bin
49:16kids breathe ah
49:18kids breathe
49:20it's like a car
49:33i can't even ride a bike anyway these overcoats are not expensive
49:42you can't laugh
49:43i'm sorry
49:54i'm here at the postcode lottery operation
49:59and then after that i'm going to ask everyone if there's anyone else who wants to rock
50:06that's what i'm going to do
50:07and cut reset for action
50:11no
50:15now lavoire can you believe that it was 15 years ago since game of thrones was first shown
50:2115 years i've got bras older than that well we've got something for you now that's equally as
50:26uplifting here's coldplay with game of thrones the musical
50:35there are starks and there are lannisters and kardashians and
50:40targaryens idiot and targaryens and of course there's some unknowns
50:46welcome to the crazy wacky world of game of thrones
50:51nice i like it
50:52thanks man cool
50:53in an exclusive red nose day revelation we've discovered that the british band
50:58coldplay are secretly working on a musical of tv sensation game of thrones
51:04they've gathered in the henson recording studio in los angeles to work up the 16 songs required for
51:10full broadway stage production around the world my heart had to roll well when i first heard about
51:18it i was a little bit skeptical but now i'm completely convinced it's a horrible idea
51:29one word that springs to mind when i'm thinking about this project is titanic but not in terms of the
51:35successful movie uh in terms of the unsuccessful boat
51:47finally after months of writing and planning chris has invited along the entire cast of game of
51:53thrones to recruit them into the live broadway show fellas how you doing yeah i had a moment of
51:58inspiration with a flash of genius get the whole cast to come in everyone thought it was a brilliant idea
52:03so that's what's happening it's a big day big day for us all the actors are gathering to hear the
52:08songs performed for the first time well not all of them more two i was told sean bean was gonna
52:18be
52:18here it was me a fiver chris how do you think it's going stunning stunning people are literally stunned
52:25and what if some of them can't sing well the funny thing is they can't sing
52:33okay three four
52:39no no no two three four
52:45snappy come on no no sorry sorry
52:51i'm sure he'll come back well with these things it's always step by step um 50 of the cast seemed
52:58really into it so um i think we're onto something really special it's been a slightly disappointing day
53:10but then hey chris
53:15i'm sorry i'm late oh my god john snow
53:23i knew you'd come i'd never let you down man thank you john snow
53:27it's kid thank you kids now right what we got man it's day two of the workshop
53:37and suddenly things take a turn for the better with a phone call from john snow
53:42and the offer of free food a huge chunk of the cast have arrived
53:56wild limb
54:00you make my heart sing
54:04you pull your bowstring and shoot me wild limb
54:20wild limb
54:22yeah
54:26really good
54:27really really really really good just um one tiny thing on the lings just be careful going a little bit
54:34flat, so. No, he wasn't. You know, nothing, Chris Martin.
54:40Don't mess around, you don't mess around with all the friends.
54:45Every style in the musical canon is captured in one day of blazing glory.
54:50Beautiful. Nice.
54:51If you're here for the wedding of Robbie Stark, keep the car running, there's no need to park.
54:55He's not going to make it through the night.
55:00Keep that wedding cake in the fridge. He didn't pay me back for using the bridge.
55:03I'm afraid this wedding won't be white.
55:08Red wedding, red wedding, lots of stabbing and a bit of beheading.
55:12The reins of Castamere are here to stay.
55:16Red wedding, dead wedding, head shredding, bloodshed wedding.
55:20There will be no wedding of wedding. Hey, you don't mess around with wall to fame.
55:26Bang. Curtains. Tony Award. Great.
55:31News of the success of the workshop spreads like wildfire. Suddenly, everyone is in.
55:36Do you know what? I've never been prouder to be in anything. I always knew it was going to be
55:41a triumph.
55:42George R. Martin meets Chris Martin. What could go wrong?
55:44Are you thinking about Joffrey? Such a spirited lad.
55:53I was his uncle. I was also his dad.
55:59The greatest rock opera of all time is coming together.
56:15I can't believe it. It's a dream come true. Everything is coming together. Everyone's on board.
56:21We just need George R. R. Martin's permission and then we're off.
56:25He's going to go absolutely crazy.
56:27And Chris was right. George R. R. Martin did go absolutely crazy.
56:34It's a setback. But a little bit of this, a little bit of that.
56:39Changed some words around. I've got plenty of other brilliant ideas.
56:42Boom, boom, boom, boom, ba-ba-da-ba-dum, boom, boom, boom, ba-ba-da-ba-boom, boom, boom, ba
56:48-ba-da-ba-boom, boom, boom, ba-ba-da-ba-boom, boom, boom, ba-ba-da-ba-boom, boom, boom,
56:50boom, ba-ba-da-ba-boom.
56:50Huh. That's not bad, actually.
56:54Well, I better get my skates on, then.
57:02Well, sadly, it's almost the end of the show. Where did the time go?
57:06Well, you took ages to get ready and we've had to pick up your sequins along the way.
57:11My sequins? What about your muddy football boots? We've had to mop this floor ten times.
57:15Anyway, seriously, Jill and I, and in fact the whole team at Comic Relief,
57:20want to say a huge thank you for your amazing support and generosity.
57:23It means the absolute world.
57:25No, it really does. And please keep donating and keep supporting as Comic Relief doesn't stop after this week, you
57:32know.
57:32It's all year round.
57:34I'll be lacing up my trainers to take on a unique sport relief challenge in the summer, so please keep
57:40an eye out for more.
57:41That's exciting, and I'm off for a leg wax. So before we go, let's relive a few more of this
57:46year's highlights.
57:46Thank you, and goodbye!
57:49That's not our lift home, is it?
57:51I hope not.
57:51I'm not going on that, Jill. Let's see if we can find our way out. Is this the door out?
58:01You ready?
58:18Perfect.
58:36All right.
58:38All right.
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