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00:05I don't want to be the first to say it, but what a great pair of testicles
00:19When I was little, we used to have a grandfather clock in the hall, and it brought me back to
00:23those days
00:28He came down the step, and he was going, you owe me 50 quid, that's the worst debt collection I've
00:34ever seen
00:36Sorry, the people that were sitting next to him, did you not think something odd was a fool?
00:45So, from chert to canning, the first tins, and I don't have a tin of canned food
00:51This is really against my principle of lifting things up as I talk about them
00:54The first tins of penis, ah-ha, you see, I'm certainly not going to do that
00:59The first tins of canned food were produced in France, in 1810
01:06Did you only say penis?
01:08No
01:09What just happened?
01:14I wanted to see if you were paying attention
01:19Stephen lifts things up as he talks about them
01:21That's all, that's what it was about
01:23Stay with the programme
01:26Kissing a man with a beard
01:30That's...
01:31You made that sound like an order, then
01:34Very well, oh, come on
01:39Well, in an odd way, all men have got beards
01:44In as much as, unless they've only just shaved very smoothly
01:46Kissing a man is a very odd, scratchy experience, in a way
01:50Desperate Dan, he was...
01:51Yeah, that's why they've got to be under 15
01:52Oh, I didn't say that
01:57Stop it at once
01:59Stop it at once
02:03Dear, oh, dear, oh, dear
02:05No, but shush
02:06No, really, shush
02:11Honolulu is the largest, it's the capital of the Hawaiian Islands
02:14And they were discovered by Captain Cook in 1778
02:16Technically, the city is approximately 1,390 miles long
02:21What?
02:21Hawaii's state constitution states
02:23That any island or islet not named or belonging to a county
02:28Belongs to Honolulu
02:29So it's that big
02:30It excludes all the other seven mountains
02:32Seven...
02:32Oh, fuck, who cares?
02:38Sorry, I seem to have lost the will to live with, Honolulu
02:42Someone in California, actually, did once say to me
02:45Because they have these sort of things out in the Salinas Valley
02:48These sort of big wine tasting things
02:50And he said all these sort of people go there
02:52And they love to be all pompous as they queue up at the end
02:55You sort of have a little tour around the vineyard
02:57And then you have a little go on the wine
02:59And he said, and everybody has this little sup
03:02And they've all got this little comment they have to make
03:05Which is, it's something but something
03:07It's cheeky but arrogant
03:08It's vivacious yet humble
03:10He says, and I like standing behind them and going, shit but free
03:16Is there any profession that has the word chip in it?
03:20Chippies
03:20Chippies, what are chippies?
03:22Carpenters
03:22Carpenters, yes
03:23Do you know where they originally were called chippies?
03:25Because they lived in a chip house
03:27I don't know where, where not why
03:29Well they did live in a chip house
03:30But they were originally
03:31In the army or in the army?
03:32Not the army but
03:33The navy
03:34The navy in that
03:35The naval, in the naval dockyards
03:37They were allowed to take any chips
03:39In other words, off cuts
03:41Of wood
03:41Home
03:42A system they abused thoroughly
03:44Taking huge great chunks out of chips
03:46And they would have these fantastic houses
03:48Made entirely out of naval timber
03:50And they were called chippies
03:52And they had the cheapest houses
03:54Anywhere, cheapest chips
03:55In fact, you might say
03:57You were an arse
03:58You were an arse
03:59The one
04:01Well they're thought to be the closest thing to the common ancestor of humans and apes
04:05Chimpanzees
04:06All kinds
04:07Unlike potatoes, they live in trees
04:09But where did these people live, Alan, behind us?
04:13Them
04:14Yeah
04:17Essex
04:23They're clearly cavemen
04:24Oh dear, oh dear, did you say cavemen?
04:27Oh dear, oh dear, did you say cavemen?
04:28Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear
04:28Oh dear, oh dear
04:30No, no, they're not
04:31No, they're stone agemen
04:32Simple dwellings?
04:33Yes, sort of out in the open
04:35Bivouwax
04:36Bivouwax
04:36Bivouwax
04:38Truffle lodges
04:38Comforty
04:40No, cavemen is just not a word that means anything really to a historian or a scientist
04:44It's a school child sort of phrase
04:46Men clearly did have lived in caves
04:49Yes, but more people live in caves now than used to
04:52There are more people, aren't there?
04:53Yeah
04:54There were 40 million people living in caves in China alone
04:58Before there was radar
05:00They decided in British defences
05:03That they would erect these enormous concrete dishes
05:05They'd put them up
05:07On the south coast
05:08And they would sort of point them at France
05:11There they are
05:13And at the focal point
05:15You could hear the engine noise before
05:1627 miles away you could hear an aeroplane coming
05:19Which is as far away as over the channel
05:22And they'd hang a microphone in the focal point right in the middle
05:24But the trouble is it was rather wind specific
05:27So on windy days they couldn't tell
05:29And it was made redundant by radar
05:30But you could hear quite a lot of gossip from France
05:36Will you have another Gouloise Pierre
05:40From metal inside the body
05:43To a body inside metal
05:46What's wrong with this?
05:49What was that noise?
05:52I'm not sure how I came out with that either
05:53I'm not sure how I came out with that either
05:55Feased a bit
05:56Let's look at this
06:01Let's look at this picture and see what's wrong with it
06:04I love you to answer a policeman like that
06:06Yes, I was at home
06:11They're eating someone
06:12They're cooking
06:12They're putting them in a pot
06:13They're going to eat him
06:14Yes, that's right
06:15It is supposed to be a depiction of cannibalism
06:17Most historians and anthropologists
06:19Now accept that cannibalism was practiced by many tribal cultures
06:22Mostly for ritual purposes
06:24Sometimes for food
06:25But producing a watertight metal pot large enough to hold a person
06:28Requires industrial technology that such tribes simply didn't possess
06:32Yes, in reality you're much more like to be butchered and roasted in small joints
06:35Or else smoked and salted for snacking on later
06:39Why the company's aficion for dogfish brings us to the catfish tasteblood question
06:47Well it's a catfish dogfish kind of link
06:50I mean what do you expect
06:51I mean we went from it's everything begins to let us see so it's a catfish all right
06:55I'd like a dogfish
06:56Yeah
06:57But I would just try to link it
06:59I mean you know cat has cut us some slack
07:03God what's that
07:04The phrase pig-eyed sack of shit leads to mine
07:12You are a great fan of the royal family
07:14Not all of them
07:15No, some of them are nice
07:17Name names
07:18Name names
07:18I think that would be rude
07:19You can't stand Edward
07:23He thinks he's a tosser
07:24No
07:29Deny it
07:30Put me in the eye and deny it
07:34This is not going out
07:35This is not going out
07:35This is not going out
07:37You should have heard before the show
07:39Cunty poo poo
07:40Cunty poo poo
07:42Going on about Ritz Albert of Monaco
07:46Avon
07:47Avon are the cosmetic of choice
07:48For the transvestite
07:50Are they?
07:51Yeah because it's difficult for the tranny to go to the cosmetics counter in the department store
07:57Like a bit of a to-do
07:58Well thank you
07:59I'd like some foundation
08:00So they
08:01They do like Avon coming round and slapping them up
08:06As it were
08:08I mean they video it on the phone
08:13On the odd occasion though
08:14I've had to wear a brilliance clothes
08:15There is a shop in Camden called Transformations
08:19For comedy sketch purposes in my case
08:24Though strangely liberating
08:27But it's the shoes you see
08:29I take size 13
08:30And there are not many women's shoe shops that would sell you a 13
08:34I can see you wandering in there now
08:35Oh hello Stephen
08:36Doing another show
08:37Come out to the room
08:42What side are you taking this time?
08:46Very difficult to walk
08:47Have you ever walked in
08:48Have you ever do you wear them?
08:49Have you ever worn them in sketch
08:50Sketch purposes obviously
08:51For sketch purposes I've worn them off and around the house
08:54I'm you know
08:56I find that a lot of the time I'm in a sketch in my head
09:00The sketch of my life dressed as a woman
09:03Exactly one has to rehearse all the way through
09:06What was invented
09:08Team panel friends
09:09On top of primrose hill
09:12Are in london
09:13On the september the 22nd 1717 at midnight
09:18Toboggan
09:19Toboggan
09:20They do do a lot of tobogganing from primrose hill
09:23Yeah
09:23September
09:24It's really high and you can go quite quick
09:25September the 22nd will be early
09:27It's an improved method of one man to carry another man downhill officer
09:32And you can't prove otherwise
09:37It is a place for the clash of tiny belt buckles at night time
09:42I know
09:42There's no question about that
09:44A sleigh
09:45Something to do with santa claus
09:47No
09:47At midnight though
09:48I might be cold
09:49The answer begins with c
09:51Begins with c
09:52Yeah
09:52Conquerors
09:53Conquerors
09:54No it's an amazing thing
09:55There was a ceremony
09:56Which also begins with c
09:57Old enough
09:58Yeah
09:58You will be astonished
09:59Castration
10:00Is it
10:01No
10:02Is there some sort of
10:03Druidical ceremony that was invented then
10:05Yes
10:05Oh right
10:06Where would
10:07Druid
10:07What are the druids said to have been
10:09The celt
10:09The celt
10:10Yes
10:10Essentially the word celt
10:12And celtic practices in english
10:14Such as we understand it
10:15Were invented that day
10:16By an extraordinarily fraudulent man
10:18If I may call him that
10:20Who was known as
10:21Iolo Morganwis
10:23But his real name was
10:24Edward Williams
10:24Yes
10:25He was an opium addict
10:27And a convicted forger
10:28And he decided that
10:31He would have little rows of stones
10:33And people dressed in white
10:34And the whole thing is nonsense
10:36There is no evidence whatsoever
10:37Apart from anything else
10:39Stonehenge which they seem to base it on
10:41Was thousands of years before Celts
10:42So all those people are turning up on midsummer day
10:45To celebrate in
10:46It's hogwash
10:47Absolute
10:48Ass
10:48What is the gayest animal?
10:53The gayest animal
10:55Well chinchilla
10:56Brian Dowling
11:03What's the most limp-wristed of all the creatures?
11:07Why are we doing this?
11:10Maximize
11:11Is the sloth?
11:12The sloth
11:13Is the gayest of all random?
11:14Well no
11:15The
11:15The
11:16The
11:16The
11:17Those
11:18Oh
11:18The New Zealand shit sticker
11:20No sorry
11:21Sorry
11:22No
11:23I'm sorry
11:24Sorry
11:24The
11:25Chutney ferret
11:27It's the
11:28Chutney ferret
11:28Yeah
11:29Yeah
11:31I've just given up any loyalty to my own tie
11:34I'm a breeze
11:36It's disgraceful
11:37I'm sorry
11:37Balinese fork sword
11:39Absolutely
11:41Yes indeed
11:42The pigskin bus
11:46I saw a graffito in uh
11:47In uh
11:48Adelaide or somewhere
11:49Which said
11:49It looked like a rugby score
11:50It said Australia
11:52Six
11:52New Zealand seven
11:53And someone explained
11:54It should be pronounced
11:55Australia sucks
11:56New Zealand's heaven
11:59It's quite good isn't it
12:01A graffito
12:01Don't you say a piece of graffiti
12:03All right
12:04If you keep wanting me to say four words
12:05When one will do
12:06I'll do it for you
12:07Klein
12:07It's a waste of time
12:08Do you say
12:09Do you say
12:09I've eaten
12:09Shut up
12:10No
12:10If you were
12:12If you were
12:13Do you say
12:14Yes
12:15I do
12:15Do you say you've eaten
12:16A piece of spaghetti
12:17Or do you say
12:18I've eaten a spaghetti
12:21Ghetto
12:22Guess
12:25Just as a matter of interest
12:26How many people
12:27Could call themselves redheaded
12:28Or vaguely dingering
12:29Are in the audience
12:29Just as a matter of
12:31One few
12:32There's a few
12:33Are any of you aware
12:34Of this fact
12:35That you need
12:3620% more anaesthetic
12:37To put you under
12:38In an operation
12:39Keep your hand up
12:40If you knew that
12:41It was a redhead
12:42It's interesting
12:43But it has recently been proven
12:44That anaesthetists
12:45Have said it
12:46Quite a lot
12:47They said
12:47Whenever I get a redhead
12:48I need to give them
12:49Slightly more
12:50To get them under
12:50To knock them out
12:51But they've recently
12:52Done a test
12:53And shown
12:53That they need
12:5420% more anaesthetic
12:55To get them
12:55To go stone cold under
12:57So they can be operated on
12:58In a general anaesthetic
12:59Nobody quite knows why
13:01It is absolutely true
13:02So that's how
13:03You could tell
13:03A real redhead
13:05You wouldn't have to see
13:05If they had
13:06Clairol bottles
13:06In their bathroom
13:07Or anything else
13:08It's got gas
13:09It's gas
13:13Apparently
13:13In my ear
13:14I've just been told
13:14The rather late answer
13:15By their little
13:16Knee belong
13:16That work away
13:17At these things
13:17My friends in QI land
13:19Have said that
13:19The reason they use
13:21Roman numerals
13:22For films
13:22Is to disguise
13:23The age of a film
13:24In the days before
13:25Television
13:26In an endless repeat
13:26So that you could
13:27Show a film
13:28Again
13:29Four years later
13:30Later in 1936
13:32Having read in 1932
13:33And on the assumption
13:34That the audience
13:34Wouldn't really know
13:36What year it was
13:36But by copyright reasons
13:38You had to place
13:39The year there
13:39But they felt
13:40If they used roman numerals
13:41The average
13:42American
13:43Let's say
13:43Audience
13:49And actually
13:49If you think
13:50In the early 30s
13:51You were having
13:52The maximum number
13:53Of roman numerals
13:55It is quite hard
13:55To decipher
13:56When it's
13:56M, D, C, M, L, X, X
13:59Three, you know
13:59They don't really want you
14:01To know what year
14:01The film was made
14:02Essentially
14:02That's the reason
14:04So it would seem
14:04How stupid would you have to be
14:06To watch all the president's men
14:08And think
14:08Did this just come out?
14:10I just don't know
14:11How American
14:12How stupid you'd have to be
14:13It is
14:14No
14:15I'm sorry
14:16That's complete nonsense
14:17Why would anyone care?
14:19I'm not watching that
14:20It's two years old
14:22Well I suppose
14:23You've already watched it anyway
14:24Because it's at the fucking end of the film
14:36I think we should start treating this game
14:38Like a horse race
14:39I think there should be handicaps
14:41You know
14:42People should get
14:42I mean you should be handicapped
14:44Why because you are?
14:49Well yeah, yeah
14:50I don't know
14:51I mean bugger all
14:53But can't you just for a second
14:56Admire
14:57Somebody who's curious
14:58About the natural world
14:59And has
15:00For a bit
15:00And likes to show
15:02For a bit
15:03Or are you going to join in
15:04The senseless
15:05Pointless
15:06Vapid
15:07Disgusting
15:08Smelly
15:09Audia
15:10Of dumbing down
15:11And querying over ignorance
15:13That is destroying this country
15:14Are you going to do that
15:15No you're not
15:18Because you should be proud
15:20Of knowing things
15:21It's exciting to know things
15:22There's nothing dull about it
15:23Just one little corner
15:24In the world
15:25Where it's exciting
15:26Don't you think
15:27No
15:30I want you to tell me
15:31Something interesting
15:31About snowflakes
15:32Oh the Eskimos
15:33Have got hundreds of words
15:34From
15:34That's true
15:35That's got to be
15:36A forefront
15:36Isn't it
15:37No but they have
15:38Got lots of names
15:39Not hundreds
15:39Because there are
15:40Lots of different types
15:41Of snow
15:41Every time a snowflake
15:43Melts
15:43A tiny
15:44Pixie dies
15:52Oh that's horrible
15:53But it's a new one
15:54Born with a new
15:54Snowstorm
15:55Yes another one
15:56Is informed
15:56Oh good
15:57The cycle of pixie life
15:58Continues
16:00So at the risk of losing points
16:03Can I say that they're all different
16:06And they all have six points
16:11Well it's certainly not true
16:13That no two are identical
16:15They're not all different necessarily
16:16At least there's absolutely no reason
16:18To suppose that
16:19After all
16:21About a litre of snow
16:23Contains a million snowflakes
16:26Of which island is Honolulu the capital
16:30Come on be brave
16:34Aho
16:34Yes is the right answer
16:36Oahu
16:36Very good
16:37Well done
16:41It is um
16:42It's not the capital of Hawaii island
16:45It's the capital of Hawaii state
16:47But not the capital of Hawaii island
16:48So the answer to which island
16:50It's capital of
16:50Is indeed
16:51Oahu
16:51Have you been there?
16:52No
16:52Actually I have been there
16:54Have you?
16:54To Honolulu
16:55But only to touch down
16:57And then take off again
16:58On the way to Australia
16:59You need to get a new travel agent
17:04Let's go back west now
17:06Who moved London
17:081,000 yards to the right?
17:12Was it Edward I?
17:14It was not Edward I
17:16But it's a good guess
17:17It was a complete guess
17:18It was a king
17:18I'll give you that
17:19I was going to say Jeff Capes
17:20Jeff Capes
17:28You could have done it
17:29If anyone could
17:30Not can you
17:31Neither
17:31We want to go back
17:32Sort of 800
17:33Ish
17:34Edward the Confessor
17:36Earlier
17:37Even than Edward the Confessor
17:38200 years before
17:39Edward the Confessor
17:39Alfred the Great
17:40Alfred the Absolutely Great
17:42Well done
17:46Yes
17:48Hang on
17:49I'll get my cards in
17:50Oh crap man
17:51Sorry
17:53Is that the one you were thinking of Stephen?
17:54Did you put your potato away?
17:55Sorry?
17:56Put my potato away?
17:57Yeah I know
17:58It's crap
17:58They want you to put your potato away
18:00Oh my potato
18:04Yes I
18:11I read your lips
18:14And you love astrology
18:15Can I say the word astrology?
18:16Body rubbish
18:16It's just absolute fucking
18:18Stephen what do you think?
18:20Stephen what do you think?
18:22Sorry
18:22Hey what are you talking about?
18:24Sorry
18:24Yes
18:24Stephen tell us all how much you love astrology
18:27Oh shh
18:27You're just trying to distract sir from his purpose
18:30Is it not true then?
18:33Look
18:34Anyway
18:34But surely the star pattern
18:36Yeah yeah
18:36Stop it
18:38Will you just stop it right now?
18:40There was one on the paper the other day
18:42Which said
18:42Oh
18:42You're a very grumpy man
18:44Yeah
18:45You're a Gemini aren't you?
18:46I'm a Capricorn
18:47Oh will you?
18:49No you're just I'm going to leave
18:50I read my lips
18:52The other day
18:53I had to go from my house
18:54Up
18:55Down to Croydon
18:56And back
18:56I got back
18:57I looked at the
18:58The stars
18:59And it said
19:00You will go on a journey
19:01Now you explain that
19:04Anyway
19:05He recommends
19:05Quantity of the finest wood lice
19:08They swarm under the bark of a very rotten tree
19:10Easy to find
19:11Drop them into boiling water
19:13It will kill them instantly
19:14But not turn them red
19:16At the same time
19:17Put into a saucepan
19:18A quarter of a pound of fresh butter
19:19A teaspoon full of flour
19:20A small glass of water
19:21A little milk
19:22Some pepper and salt
19:22Place it on the stove
19:24As soon as the sauce is thick
19:25Take it off
19:25Put in the wood lice
19:27This is an excellent sauce for fish
19:28So that's how you would serve it
19:29Yeah
19:30The cheese
19:31Lot of effort isn't it
19:32I'm a tosser to do that
19:33Why?
19:35You don't eat them do you?
19:36I might do now
19:37I eat shrimp
19:38What's the difference?
19:39You wouldn't do that
19:39Why not?
19:40You wouldn't eat a wood lice
19:41Yes I wouldn't
19:41In front of you
19:42Why not?
19:43It's repulsive
19:45What more repulsive than a shrimp?
19:46Yeah
19:47Why?
19:47Well it tastes worse
19:48He just said it tasted better
19:50Someone has eaten it
19:51I'd rather trust someone
19:52Had eaten it
19:52Than someone who hadn't
19:53I don't trust that man
19:55At all
19:55He's trying to trick people
19:56Like you
19:57Into eating insects
19:59Based on
20:00I've eaten that
20:00It was nice
20:02I once ate my own faeces
20:04It was delicious
20:06It tasted like a shrimp
20:07Would you like some
20:08Sauce on your fish
20:10Made out of my shit?
20:12Ooh
20:12Well
20:12Considering that eating faeces
20:14He's killed 70 million people
20:16In England alone
20:17I didn't really eat my own faeces
20:19It was a joke
20:19No but I know
20:20That it was guilty
20:2170 million
20:23It's considered
20:23In Europe
20:24Over the however
20:25I'll tell you what
20:25Just for you
20:26I'd do it in a Dettol
20:27Kind of disinfectant source
20:29To eliminate quite a lot
20:30Of the poisonous bacteria
20:31Yeah but
20:31I don't think it tastes
20:32That's
20:32I'm almost sure it doesn't
20:33It smells disgusting
20:34But you see insects
20:35Are eaten by people
20:35All over the world
20:36Are you going to tell
20:36The Africans
20:37They're wrong
20:37We used to have an Alsatian
20:38That used to eat
20:39Our golden retriever's shit
20:42She lapped that up
20:43So maybe I'll dish
20:45Some of that up
20:46For you
20:46Because I've seen that eaten
20:48She'd go out every day
20:50For that
20:50And lap it up
20:51And she also ate meat
20:52So maybe it's similar
20:53Taste
20:54Well you may be right
20:54But it seems unlikely
20:55I don't see the connection
20:57Myself
20:57Well you're a vegetarian
20:58You see
20:58So you don't like
20:58Any of us eating
21:00Any living thing
21:00But why you should
21:01Make a distinction
21:02Between a shrimp
21:02And a woodlouse
21:03Doesn't seem logical
21:04To me
21:04Just trying to join in
21:08It's an absurd topic
21:11Generate a bit of humor
21:12Out of it
21:13Yeah
21:13It's good
21:14You're pretending
21:15To masquerading
21:16As an insect eater
21:17For the people
21:18You wouldn't touch
21:18I would
21:20Shall we make a bet
21:21Here and now
21:21In the join room
21:22No
21:23Shall we make a bet
21:24Here and now
21:24I can see you now
21:25Do you want to make a bet
21:25How much
21:26A thousand pounds
21:27We can give it to charity
21:27If you prefer
21:29Okay
21:29Yeah
21:30Go on
21:31I've got one here
21:33But if anyone
21:33Could produce one
21:34A woodlouse
21:35No
21:35I said a woodlouse
21:37What do you mean
21:38An animal
21:39With a paralysing sting
21:42Well I'm afraid
21:43That is the bet
21:44Yeah
21:47Happily
21:51William Carolcraft
21:52Not to be confused
21:53With William Castor
21:54As the last man
21:55Ever to be tortured
21:56With the thumbscrew
21:57In Britain
21:57Or of course
21:58With the popular
21:59Hollywood entertainer
22:00William Crystal
22:02Crystals
22:02Are what snowflakes
22:04Are made of
22:10It is shaming
22:12Isn't it
22:14It's white
22:14The ladies bits
22:15Smell
22:16What?
22:17No
22:17I mean
22:17In a nice way
22:20The authority on ladies
22:22I agree
22:25It's not
22:26I didn't go on
22:28To A level
22:28I grant you
22:29But anyway
22:31Are you telling me
22:32You did the induction course?
22:34Oh I've been there
22:35I dabbled
22:36I dabbled
22:38A CSE
22:39Yes
22:40Keep my hand in
22:42From time to time
22:45I love it
22:46Oh dear dear
22:46No no
22:48Oh no
22:49That's where you were going from
22:52Now you tell me
22:59I don't know
23:02He's from East Anglia
23:03They love it
23:05Oh Stephen
23:08Don't
23:09You think I'm such a flirt
23:13I apologise
23:14To all you standing
23:15Who's listening
23:15Not for the slur
23:17On your sexual nature
23:18But for the
23:19West country accent
23:26How common was cannibalism
23:28In England
23:29At the time of
23:30Elizabeth the first
23:32Bloody rife
23:34They were all at it
23:35Yes
23:36In fact
23:37Every day
23:38The population halved
23:42There's only two people left
23:44No there you're wrong
23:45Yes
23:46It was rife
23:47But no
23:47They weren't eating each other
23:48But they were eating humans
23:50So they weren't cannibal
23:50Okay
23:51Were they biting their nails
23:52No they weren't eating themselves
23:53They were eating other humans
23:55Foreigners
23:55Were they buying each other's
23:56Foreigners yes
23:57Almost every apothecary
23:58Every chemist shop
23:59As it were
24:00In Elizabethan England
24:01Sold this particular product
24:03Was it just the dust from tombs
24:05Ah you're very close
24:06Not the dust from
24:07The dust from
24:07Actual mummies
24:09Mummies
24:10They would eat mummies
24:10Mummy powder was
24:11Much favoured
24:14So that's it
24:15From QI
24:16For another week
24:16My thanks to
24:17Rich Bob
24:17Bill
24:18And Alan
24:18Bob
24:19Sorry
24:21Sorry
24:22So sorry
24:22You've never been called
24:23Bob
24:23Sorry
24:24Starting again
24:25So sorry everybody
24:26Small smattering
24:27If you've got one left
24:28In you
24:28Rich bar
24:29Thank you
24:32Well that's it
24:33From QI
24:34For another week
24:35My thanks to
24:35Rich Rob
24:36Bill
24:36And Alan
24:36I leave you with
24:37This portionary thought
24:39Captain Cook
24:39May have discovered
24:40You're not going to do
24:41This crap joke
24:42Again
24:47You've got one half of it
24:47Well Will
24:48What's an American
24:49Well Will
24:50That's
24:51OK
24:52Oh we're picking up
24:53From an earlier
24:54Later bit
24:54Are we
24:55No from the original bit
24:56Thanks
24:56It's written on the bottle.
24:57Oh, okay.
24:58Sorry, everybody.
25:01Well, that's it from QI for another week.
25:03My thanks to Rich, Rob, Bill, and Alan.
25:04I'll leave you with this cautionary thought.
25:06Captain Cook may have observed the transit of Venus in Seaman.
25:09Oh, no, you've not.
25:11You bastard.
25:14You.
25:18There it is.
25:19And each time it's gonna get more and more pathetic.
25:23Oh, God.
25:25Oh, dear.
25:28Now, do you want a drink in the bar afterwards?
25:31Huh? Yeah?
25:32Yeah.
25:32Then shut your face.
25:39That's it from another QI for another week.
25:41My thanks to Rich, Rob, Bill, and Alan.
25:43I'll leave you with this cautionary thought.
25:45Captain Cook may have observed the transit of Venus.
25:47He's right, you know.
25:48He's right.
25:48He's right.
25:50You bastard!
25:53He's so unfair.
25:55He's so unfair.
25:56He's so unfair.
25:57He's so unfair.
26:21Give to his niece.
26:22See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails.
26:25Ha, ha, ha.
26:26Ha!
26:28Woo!
26:31Good night.
26:32Oh, God.
26:34Good night.
26:35Good night.
26:35In fact, we ca-
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