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00:00Let's see what I am doing tonight.
00:02Best-selling musical artist.
00:04Nate's parents did not let him listen to rock and roll.
00:07Man.
00:08If he knows a lot of these, he's gonna get grounded.
00:10Cat Stevens.
00:11Billy Ray Cyrus.
00:13Michael W. Smith.
00:15Amy Grant.
00:16Amy Grant!
00:18Golly.
00:20From the Nashville Municipal Auditorium,
00:23it's the only comedy show that also happens to be a game show.
00:27The Greatest Average American.
00:32And now, your host,
00:34Ned Barney Davis!
00:39Thank you very much.
00:41Thank you so much.
00:43Welcome to our new show where it's not about what you know,
00:46it's about what your fellow average American knows.
00:50Speaking of average, we've got my buddy and fellow comedian,
00:53Julian McCullough, warming up the audience tonight.
00:59And our announcer and fellow comedian, Greg Ward.
01:02Whoo!
01:05Greg, who do we have playing tonight?
01:07A retired meteorologist from the Sunshine State of Florida.
01:11Let's welcome Linda!
01:13There we go.
01:15Let's get it, man!
01:16A former delivery driver from Chicago, Illinois, it's Chris!
01:23And last but not least, a fly fisher and newlyweds from the land of 10,000 lakes,
01:28that's Minnesota, it's Kayla!
01:34Wow.
01:35And you just, like, go stay. You wear the things.
01:38You know it, yes.
01:39You know the, yeah, and you're in the stream.
01:40I got the waders, yeah.
01:42A lot of bear?
01:43I have run into bears, and it's tough because we're both looking for the same thing in the river, usually.
01:49Yeah, that's tough.
01:49But you gotta watch your, you know, watch your back.
01:51All right, that's very, that's very exciting.
01:54All right, let's get to the game.
01:56We're gonna play through two elimination rounds, with one person going home after each one.
02:02Last player standing earns the title of the greatest average American, and moves on to
02:07our bonus round, where you could win the average American salary of $67,920.
02:16There we go.
02:18In our first round, we ask Americans questions about how they feel, what they like, and how
02:24they live.
02:24I'll reveal the questions, and all you have to do is choose the response said by the
02:29majority of Americans.
02:31These first two questions are worth one point each.
02:34Here's your first question.
02:37We asked 100 average American pizza delivery drivers, which of these would be the worst place
02:43to deliver a pizza?
02:46Airport baggage claim.
02:48B, seventh floor walk up.
02:51C, a dog park.
02:52D, your ex's house.
02:56That one came, ten seconds.
02:58That one, that one came out of nowhere.
03:04I delivered pizzas.
03:09Chris, what did you say?
03:11Okay.
03:11I said B.
03:13Yeah.
03:13Seventh floor walk up.
03:14Now, I'm not a pizza delivery, but I did do Uber Eats.
03:17Yeah.
03:17So I did Uber Eats and DoorDash.
03:19And that seventh floor, even with the elevator, it's just so long.
03:22Like, don't nobody want to do that.
03:23Yeah.
03:23Uber Eats and DoorDash, that's like your world, right?
03:26No.
03:26No.
03:27But yeah, keeping a job is pretty hard for me.
03:29I know it's not your world, but I mean, it is made for people that have trouble keeping
03:33a job.
03:34I mean, it's got, if they would have had that in my day, oh my goodness.
03:39Come on now.
03:39You can just pop in and out.
03:41Literally, we make our own schedule.
03:43We're in a home box.
03:43It's the best.
03:44You know what I'm saying?
03:44It's the best.
03:46All right.
03:46Linda.
03:47I'm right with Chris on this.
03:49I don't think there's any way I want to be climbing seven floors to deliver a pizza
03:54up and down.
03:55No way.
03:55Kayla?
03:56I also said be seventh floor walk-up.
03:59We're all in sync.
04:01But I mean, it was like, do you got to, like, go through TSA with the pizza?
04:04Are they checking it?
04:05Not a baggage claim.
04:06And then ex's house, I was like, there could be some people out there wishing their ex
04:09would make them come deliver pizza because maybe they don't want anything to do with
04:12them.
04:12So I was confident.
04:13Seventh floor walk-up.
04:14You're not trying to carry that all the way up there.
04:16All right.
04:17Well, let's find out, did the average American audience agree with you?
04:22What did they say?
04:24Yes!
04:24Seventh floor walk-up.
04:28One point for each.
04:30Yay!
04:31We all nailed it.
04:33All right.
04:34This one's a little different.
04:35You're guessing the percentage of people from zero to 100.
04:38Gotcha.
04:38All right.
04:39Whoever comes closest to the correct answer gets the point.
04:44We asked 100 average Americans if you won $67,920 on a game show.
04:51And then a good friend asked if they could have $10,000.
04:55Would you give it to them?
04:57What percent said yes?
04:59Ten seconds.
05:02Y'all might be finding out.
05:10Oh, God.
05:11Kayla, let's start with you on this one.
05:13This one was tough because I wanted to answer what I would do, but I had to take myself
05:17out of it.
05:17I would say yes if I win.
05:19Don't call me, guys.
05:21But I put 36%, which I feel like was kind of high.
05:26But now that I turned it, I'm like, maybe that's low.
05:28It's an aggressive amount.
05:29It is.
05:30Chris.
05:30Okay, so I went with 38%.
05:33Wow.
05:34Right at each other.
05:34I know.
05:35Nerves wrecking.
05:36But $10,000?
05:37That's a lot of money.
05:38That's a lot of money.
05:38If I got $60,000 and you asked for $10,000?
05:42It's nuts.
05:42You're not getting that.
05:43I bet you couldn't wait to tell them no.
05:45Oh, no.
05:45Yeah.
05:46I'm gonna be like, girl, can we lower with him?
05:48Yeah.
05:48I'll give you $1,000, but no.
05:49Yeah, yeah.
05:50All right.
05:51Uh, Linda?
05:52I feel really cheap right now.
05:57Okay, somebody had to go low.
05:58Yes.
05:59So, there you go.
06:01Seven percent.
06:02Wow.
06:02Seven percent.
06:03No save.
06:04It's not her.
06:05It's what...
06:09It's a chunk.
06:11It's $10,000.
06:12I agree.
06:13I think it's crazy.
06:14I think it's a lot of money.
06:15I think it's crazy.
06:16I think your friend is... has a problem.
06:18Yeah.
06:19Okay.
06:19Okay.
06:20I agree.
06:21Look, I'm excited to see what happens.
06:23What percent said yes?
06:2863%!
06:30Chris, got it?
06:31Humanity!
06:32Okay.
06:33Humanity has been restored.
06:35Wow.
06:35That's unbelievable.
06:36Wow.
06:37That's a complete lie.
06:38That...
06:39Those people lie.
06:40Wow.
06:41All right.
06:41Good job.
06:42But good.
06:42You know what?
06:43We got some good people out there.
06:44All right.
06:45Just two questions left.
06:46I'm gonna raise the stakes a little, so this next one is worth two points.
06:50Phew.
06:52We asked 100 average Americans, who has the easiest job at the North Pole?
06:57A.
06:58A.
06:58B.
06:59The Elves.
07:00C.
07:01Reindeer.
07:02D.
07:02Miss Claws.
07:0610 seconds.
07:08I don't know.
07:10I don't know.
07:17All right.
07:19Chris, you're at two points.
07:21Linda and Kayla, you're at one point.
07:23Linda?
07:24I went with the reindeer because basically they just work one day.
07:30I feel like throwing Mrs. Claus in there was totally...
07:34Tricky.
07:35It's tricky.
07:36No guy can say Mrs. Claus.
07:38Yeah, yeah.
07:38You can't.
07:39You just can't.
07:40Yeah, you can't say the truth out here, you know what I mean?
07:42Hey, hey, hey!
07:44No, I'm joking.
07:45You can't say that for real.
07:46But the reindeer...
07:47That's correct.
07:47They're flying all over the world in 24 hours.
07:51That's a lot.
07:51But that's...
07:52Yes.
07:53But that's only one day the reindeer work.
07:54That's one day.
07:55It's a big day.
07:56I went with the reindeer.
07:57Yeah, yeah.
07:58That's right.
07:58Reindeer.
07:59All right.
08:00Chris?
08:00Oh, okay.
08:01I went with D, Mrs. Claus.
08:03Oh!
08:04Look, I think...
08:05Okay, let me give you my reasoning.
08:06Because...
08:06All right.
08:07Santa, he got a lot going on.
08:09The elves are the real hard workers.
08:11And reindeer, that's a lot of work flying in the air.
08:14Shout out to them.
08:15So Mrs. Claus, she's just making everybody feel good.
08:18So she's like the real housewives of the North Pole.
08:20Yeah, yeah.
08:20She is the real housewives.
08:22You know, she's the ultimate housewife diva down.
08:24Yeah.
08:25So I went with Mrs. Claus.
08:26I mean, you want to change your answer because of what Chris said.
08:29Yeah.
08:30That's how good it was.
08:31I thought you were doing a great job.
08:32I'm nervous.
08:33Kayla.
08:34Clearly it was a women's trend.
08:35I said reindeer.
08:37Reindeer.
08:37I mean, the reindeer are bred for it.
08:39They're probably looking forward to that one day.
08:41They get a fly around.
08:42I'm with you.
08:43There's no song for Mrs. Claus, though.
08:45No, no, no.
08:45She's doing all this work.
08:46I know, I know.
08:46She ain't got no song.
08:48You know what I'm saying?
08:49Where's the song with Mrs. Claus in it?
08:51If she's the hardest working.
08:53She should write one.
08:54I think it's Mrs. Claus.
08:55All right.
08:56We asked the 100 average Americans, what did they say?
09:01Santa.
09:02Wow.
09:03Hey.
09:04Good night.
09:05They eat it?
09:06Oh, my gosh.
09:06I don't even...
09:08Well, I guess...
09:0940% said Santa.
09:11Is that crazy?
09:12Mrs. Claus, 34%.
09:13Oh, wow.
09:14I got that.
09:15I agree.
09:16That's because you just can't say Mrs. Claus.
09:18You can.
09:19All right.
09:20Chris has got two points.
09:22Linda, one point.
09:23Kayla, one point.
09:24This is the last question.
09:25Uh-oh.
09:26It is worth a whopping three points.
09:31We asked 100 average American Olympic fans,
09:35if you had to compete in one of these Olympic sports
09:38with exactly one week of training,
09:41which would you do the best at?
09:43Okay.
09:44A, wrestling.
09:47B, synchronized swimming.
09:49C, break dancing.
09:52D, pole vault.
09:54Ten seconds.
09:54Oh, my gosh.
09:57Last question.
09:58It all comes to this.
09:59Greg, you were a Division I wrestler.
10:02I was, Nate.
10:03That was the old me.
10:04I would go break dancing.
10:05Time's up.
10:06Uh...
10:08All right.
10:09This all comes down to this.
10:10Oy.
10:11I know.
10:11I'm scared.
10:12I know.
10:13Uh, Kayla, what'd you say?
10:14I panic ordered.
10:16I don't want to do any of these.
10:17I was hoping curling was gonna be up there.
10:19Yeah.
10:19I picked wrestling.
10:22I needed that, guys.
10:24All right.
10:25Chris?
10:26Irene, I went with break dancing.
10:28See?
10:28Yeah.
10:29I think you could do it.
10:30I think you could do that.
10:30I know.
10:31That's why a lot of people talk about it being an Olympic sport.
10:35The fact that we think we could teach it in a week.
10:38Uh, Linda.
10:40I did go with the break dancing.
10:42Break dancing?
10:43This makes this interesting.
10:45I just don't think you have to be that good at it.
10:47I mean, you don't have to, like...
10:48No, it's hard to tell if someone's a good dancer.
10:50It is hard, but you gotta win.
10:51I don't know.
10:52All right.
10:53This is a big one.
10:54It all comes down to this one.
10:55We got two break dancing, one wrestling.
10:59What did the average American say?
11:03Wow!
11:05That's crazy.
11:07Wrestling!
11:07Come on, Teva!
11:08Let's go!
11:09Wrestling!
11:10That's...I did not see that.
11:12You're wrestling right now after that.
11:13Like, what?
11:13All right.
11:14Congratulations, Chris and Kayla.
11:17You're moving on!
11:18Whoo!
11:20Unfortunately, Linda, you are the most below-average American tonight.
11:24Thank you so much for playing.
11:26With The Greatest Average American returns,
11:29our players will be predicting how average I am
11:32at throwing footballs.
11:34Do not go anywhere!
11:37Whoo!
11:47Welcome back to The Greatest Average American.
11:50Chris and Kayla are one step closer to playing for the average American salary of $67,920.
11:58Whoo!
11:59Whoo!
12:00Whoo!
12:00Whoo!
12:01Whoo!
12:03All right.
12:04This next round is all about getting into the mind and body of the original Greatest Average
12:08American himself, and that is myself.
12:13Tonight, I am playing armchair quarterback.
12:18I will be seated in this comfy recliner and tossing footballs at these targets.
12:22I've got 60 seconds to nail as many as I can, and to figure out who's going to the bonus
12:29round,
12:29you two are predicting how I'm gonna do.
12:31One of you will start off by guessing exactly how many I can make in 60 seconds.
12:36The other will then write over if you think I will make more than that, or under if you think
12:42I will make less.
12:44Kayla, you scored the highest in the first round, so you get to decide.
12:47I will be doing the over-under.
12:50Wow.
12:50Only the numbers to you, Chris.
12:52There we go.
12:53Chris, how many footballs do you think I can get into these targets in 60 seconds?
12:58Write down your guess and show everybody except me.
13:01I do not want to see.
13:03Don't show me.
13:12All right.
13:13Kayla, you saw how many he said I would hit in 60 seconds.
13:16Do you think I'll go over that number or under it?
13:19Write down your guess and don't show anyone.
13:25All right.
13:25Answers are in.
13:26It's my time to shine.
13:28Greg, a little help.
13:29All right.
13:30Good luck, Nate.
13:3360 seconds on the clock, please.
13:38On your mark.
13:40Oh, boy.
13:42Get set.
13:44Nate!
13:46He's got more.
13:49He's got more.
13:53Yeah!
13:56I got so hard.
13:59Oh, man.
14:00He's four.
14:0135 seconds.
14:01Unbelievable.
14:02He's got two.
14:1630 seconds, Nate.
14:17You're halfway home.
14:18He's on fire.
14:2520 seconds, Nate.
14:26You have eight.
14:3015 seconds.
14:32You have 10.
14:3510 seconds.
14:36Ten seconds, Nate.
14:37You have 11.
14:49I
14:50All right
15:04I
15:05I shouldn't have ate that chip, bud.
15:09How many did I get?
15:10Thirteen.
15:11Thirteen?
15:12A solid thirteen?
15:13Not bad.
15:14I feel good.
15:16I feel good.
15:17All right.
15:18Chris, how many did you think I could do?
15:22All righty.
15:22So I went with 28.
15:24I should have done 28.
15:27Kayla, if you guessed under, you win.
15:30But if it's over, then you're going home.
15:32What did you say?
15:33I said under.
15:35I said under!
15:38That means Kayla is moving on.
15:41Congratulations.
15:42You are the greatest average American,
15:45and you deserve a little something
15:47to go with your new title.
15:48How does $10,000 sound?
15:51But can she turn it into $67,920?
15:57Find out in the bonus round
15:59when we return to the greatest average American.
16:13Welcome back.
16:14I'm here with our winner, Kayla.
16:17She has earned the coveted title
16:19of the greatest average American.
16:21And with that comes $10,000.
16:23Woo!
16:25There you go.
16:27That's yours to keep no matter what.
16:29But you now have a chance to increase your winnings
16:32to the average American salary of $67,920.
16:37Woo!
16:40Woo!
16:41All right, look, I know what everybody's thinking,
16:43especially the non-fun people.
16:45Well, you got to pay the taxes on all that money if you win it.
16:48Not on my game show.
16:50I'm going to put a little extra in
16:52to help cover all your taxes.
16:56What?
16:57Yes!
16:58What would you do, uh, if you win it?
17:01I would take a dream trip that I've wanted to do
17:04for my entire life that is going to Scotland.
17:07I am Scottish, the Lockhart name,
17:09and I've dreamed of this trip for my entire life.
17:12Me and my husband got married in May,
17:14and we never got a chance to take a honeymoon.
17:16Is your husband here?
17:17He is!
17:18The most handsome man in the crowd!
17:22Look at that.
17:24If I had to guess a man that married a fly fisher,
17:27that's what I bet he looks like.
17:29All right.
17:31You showed you can think like the average American,
17:34but there's one more group of average Americans
17:36you need to face, and that's our audience.
17:39Before the show, we asked them seven questions.
17:42You'll have 30 seconds to correctly predict
17:45how the majority of them answered.
17:47Get five right, and you'll go home with $67,000.
17:50That's $920.
17:52But beware, because it's three strikes, and you're out.
17:57All right, audience, it's your answers
17:59that are helping win this money,
18:00so you should have some skin in the game.
18:02If Kayla wins, you're all going home
18:04with one of my favorite things.
18:05Julian, what are they getting?
18:06Two backstage tours of the Grand Ole Opry.
18:11Oh, my God!
18:14Wow!
18:15That's nice.
18:18The Grand Ole Opry.
18:19It's amazing.
18:19Look at it.
18:20It's amazing.
18:21You know, my first show, I used to sweep the steps
18:23in that place.
18:24I'd be all serious.
18:25You laughed, and it was serious.
18:27But dead serious.
18:28That's what I'll go back to when this falls apart.
18:31Yeah.
18:31I'll be able to win and let you guys see
18:33where he swept the floors.
18:34We're going to go see it.
18:35All right, remember, three strikes, you're out.
18:37That's right.
18:39Five right, and you're going home with $67,920.
18:43Yes.
18:4530 seconds on the clock.
18:47Do you feel good?
18:48Yes, I feel fantastic.
18:50I'm about to change my life in 30 seconds.
18:52All right, here we go.
18:55What did this audience enjoy more at Thanksgiving,
18:58the football or the food?
18:59Food.
19:01Have they ever gotten a piercing?
19:03Yes.
19:04How do they wear their baseball cap?
19:07Do they have a land life?
19:10Which chore do they like better?
19:12Laundry.
19:14Who do they think they would win in a fight,
19:16Godzilla or King Kong?
19:17King Kong.
19:20Would they rather be complimented on their looks
19:22or their brains?
19:23Brains.
19:24All right, seven questions.
19:25There we go.
19:26We did it.
19:30All right, you feel good?
19:32You excited?
19:33I feel very confident about some
19:35and very, uh, definitely panic-ordered on some.
19:38All right.
19:39Well, look, the first one.
19:41What does this audience enjoy more at Thanksgiving,
19:44the football or the food?
19:45You feel confident or you feel panicked?
19:47Could you picture Thanksgiving without the food?
19:49I feel like most of the people in the audience
19:51are with me.
19:52All right, well, let's find out.
19:54You said food.
19:55Did the audience say food?
19:57Yes!
19:57There we go.
19:59There we go.
20:00Woo!
20:02All right.
20:02Oh, man.
20:03Have they ever got a piercing?
20:05Pretty much every woman has their ears pierced.
20:07Yeah.
20:08And I'm hoping there's a lot of female in here answering.
20:11Yeah.
20:12Uh, all right.
20:13I'm scared.
20:13You said yes.
20:14I know, I did.
20:16There's no going back.
20:17Let's see.
20:17Did they say yes?
20:18Come on.
20:20Yes!
20:20Yes!
20:21All right!
20:23All right.
20:25Oh, man.
20:27How do they wear their baseball cap?
20:28Forward, backward?
20:29You said forward?
20:30Did they say forward?
20:33Yes!
20:34Look at this.
20:37Three for three.
20:40Holy buckets.
20:41Do they have a landline phone at home?
20:46I would have loved for it to be yes.
20:48We all want to, right?
20:50Everybody.
20:51Oh, that was the days.
20:52Yes.
20:52Those were the days.
20:54Uh, you said no.
20:56In this day and time.
20:57Did the audience say no as well?
21:00Yeah.
21:11Oh, man.
21:12All right.
21:14Four for four.
21:16I know.
21:16My heart's pounding.
21:17One more to win $67,920.
21:24It's crazy.
21:25Oh, my gosh.
21:27Let's see.
21:28We got, uh...
21:28No pressure.
21:29Which chore do they like better?
21:31I don't know.
21:31Which one do you want to go to?
21:33Do we kind of want to see who would win in a fight?
21:36Yeah, let's go.
21:37That's the main thing.
21:38I feel like, I mean, King Kong, they're both scary, don't get me wrong, but I feel confident.
21:42I feel confident.
21:44All right.
21:45To win the average American salary, did the audience say King Kong?
21:59All right.
22:01Oh, that's so great.
22:03Oh, that's so hot.
22:05That's so hot.
22:07Congratulations.
22:08You feel hot.
22:08Yeah, look at you all.
22:10Hey!
22:11All right.
22:13Congratulations, Kayla.
22:15You've won $67,920.
22:19An audience.
22:20You know what that means?
22:22Every audience is going home with a pair of tickets for the Grand Ole Opry backstage tour.
22:25When we come back, three new players will battle out to see who's the most average.
22:31Don't go anywhere.
22:33The greatest average American will be right back.
22:36Congratulations.
22:38Yeah.
22:39That's awesome, man.
22:41That's so awesome.
22:42Oh, my God.
22:43Thank you so much.
22:43We're going to Scotland.
22:45By the way, she went seven for seven.
22:47Got all of them right.
22:48Oh, my God.
22:49Oh, ho, ho.
22:58Welcome back to The Greatest Average American.
23:01Our pursuit of average continues with three new contestants.
23:05Let's see who we've got.
23:07Greg?
23:08Tonight, we have a father of three and a teacher from the great state of Wisconsin.
23:12It's Kevin.
23:13Hi, Luke.
23:17Next, it's a newlywed from my hometown of St. Louis, Missouri.
23:22Please welcome Natalie.
23:24Yay!
23:27And last but not least, we have an auto mechanic from the great state of New York.
23:31Give it up for Armani.
23:40That's right.
23:41Armani.
23:42If Armani was your last name, we wouldn't even be here, would we?
23:46No, I'd be famous somewhere in Italy.
23:47Yeah, yeah.
23:48Tell me, what are you most above average at?
23:51I am most above average at collecting exotic animals.
23:53Really?
23:54I have a leopard gecko, a bearded dragon, and a variety of exotic tarantulas.
23:58Yeah.
23:58At one point in time, I had 450 tarantulas in my room that I used to breed.
24:03You're a fun one to live with.
24:05I like it.
24:06I sure am.
24:06I sure am.
24:06Let's get to the game.
24:07Woo!
24:08Yeah!
24:09Let's do it.
24:09Let's do it.
24:11Let's do it.
24:12These first two questions, they're all worth one point each.
24:15Here's your first question.
24:18We asked 100 average married Americans.
24:21Which of these is most likely to start an argument in your house?
24:27A, dishes left in the sink.
24:29B, making plans without asking.
24:31C, watching a head on a TV show.
24:34D, thermostat.
24:36You got 10 seconds.
24:39I'm currently in all four of these fights.
24:43I'm hitting for the cycle, as they say.
24:49Natalie, I kind of want to hear from you first, because you are newly married.
24:54Yeah, two months ago.
24:55Wow.
24:56My husband's right there.
24:58There we go.
25:00Yeah.
25:01So, what did you say?
25:02And I don't know if you had time to get in these fights, but maybe.
25:05You know, this feels familiar to me.
25:08I went with A, dishes left in the sink.
25:10Left in the sink.
25:10You know, I might be speaking from experience on that one.
25:13That's true.
25:13Yeah.
25:13You hear that?
25:14Yeah.
25:15No, he knows what I would pick on that one.
25:18Kevin, how did you go?
25:19I went with B, making plans without asking.
25:23Yeah.
25:23I've been known to just say, hey, I'm going to go do this, by the way.
25:28Oh, yeah.
25:28And you could be like, what?
25:29Kevin, let me tell you.
25:30We just met, but if I was asked how to describe you, I would say, making plans without asking.
25:37That's the, I think you're a fun time.
25:39And you're like, let's go, Armani.
25:42I feel like you have possibly all this going on.
25:45It's, I mean, you got the thermostat that could be wacky with these animals.
25:50So, what did you say?
25:52So, I went with option C, watching ahead on a TV show.
25:55Watching ahead on a TV show.
25:56That's our one time to bond together.
25:58How dare you get ahead and watch it?
25:59Yeah, exactly.
26:00Because that's just not right.
26:01All right, I like it.
26:02We asked 100 average married Americans.
26:04Let's see what they said.
26:06What did they say?
26:08Making plans without asking, Kevin.
26:12Thank you, good job.
26:14What was second place, Drew?
26:15Dishes left in sync.
26:17There we go, there we go.
26:19Watching ahead was low.
26:22Wow.
26:23The one that was before it was, don't own reptiles.
26:26That wasn't even on there.
26:27Yeah.
26:28Next question, please.
26:31We asked 100 average Americans, which animal would make the best non-traditional pet?
26:39Armani, buddy.
26:40Raccoon.
26:41B, flamingo.
26:43C, alpaca.
26:44C, alpaca.
26:45D, C, on.
26:4710 seconds.
26:49Armani, this is built for you.
27:00I mean, I think we're all waiting on one answer.
27:03And it's starting to be...
27:05Obviously, I'm going to go first.
27:06I picked alpaca.
27:07Alpaca, yes.
27:08To me, I love animals.
27:09And if I come into a house and there's an alpaca there, it would make my day because they're
27:12one of the cutest animals.
27:13If an alpaca came in your house, how long would it survive?
27:17Honestly, if the alpaca stayed away from that one room, it would have a great life.
27:21Well, the whole point is I want to know what happens if it gets to the room.
27:24Well, if it gets to the room...
27:26Hey, I like the fact that you think an alpaca will list you.
27:28You're like, you better not go in that room, alpaca.
27:30Stay out of the room.
27:31Stay out of the room.
27:32Natalie?
27:33All right.
27:34I went with C, alpaca.
27:36Same thing, cuteness factor.
27:37Yeah, same exact reason.
27:38Alpaca all the way.
27:39Yeah.
27:40Kevin?
27:41I went with D, sea otter.
27:44Oh, Kevin, I could have guessed that for you, brother.
27:47You feel sea otter.
27:48Oh, I just want to squeeze its cheeks.
27:50Yeah.
27:50I don't think they let you touch them, but I bet it'd be great.
27:54I love it.
27:54All right.
27:55Let's see, what did the average American say?
28:00Raccoon!
28:01Oh, my God.
28:01There's no way.
28:02What was a raccoon?
28:04There's a lot of raccoons.
28:05People have raccoons.
28:06Well, I've seen it.
28:07Yeah, it's scary.
28:07Yeah.
28:08You have two questions left.
28:09I'm going to raise the stakes a little, so this next one is worth two points.
28:13This one's a little different.
28:14You're guessing the percentage of people from zero to 100.
28:19Here we go.
28:20Next question.
28:23We asked 100 average Americans to point to Neptune in our solar system.
28:28What percentage got it right?
28:31Ten seconds.
28:33I can't do that now.
28:35Yeah.
28:44I think I know.
28:46Is it with rings?
28:48That's Saturn.
28:50No, that's Saturn.
28:51Yeah.
28:51Is it blue?
28:52It's the blue one.
28:54It's one farther.
28:55It's the whatever color that is.
28:57Now I'm feeling bad.
28:58It's light blue.
28:59Neptune's a little farther out than I thought.
29:01Yeah, me too.
29:01I'll be honest with you.
29:02I thought Neptune was closer.
29:03Man, where's Earth?
29:07I got that one.
29:09Natalie, what did you say?
29:10I went with 30%.
29:12Yeah, 30% of them could do it.
29:14I don't think that it's going to be high enough to be like 50%, but I still think there are
29:17going
29:18to be some people out there that know where it's at.
29:19Yeah, that are not us, that are not us, yeah, definitely some other people out there.
29:24Kevin, you're in the school system.
29:26I am.
29:27Do they know it?
29:27I was a little more confident because I work with some very wonderful students, so I said
29:3355% because I think they may know.
29:36Let's hope they did this poll at your school.
29:40Armani?
29:41Um, I actually went with 38%.
29:4438%?
29:4438% because, I mean, honestly, I don't think 50% of the people can pick where Neptune is.
29:49And if they can, kudos to you because I couldn't do it.
29:51All right, let's see what the percentage was.
29:5834%!
30:00Oh, my God.
30:00Armani and Natalie, push.
30:02The answer was 34, and y'all split right between y'all, so you both get two points.
30:06Oh, my God.
30:0738, 34%.
30:08That's good for you guys.
30:09All right.
30:1331 picked Jupiter, 7 picked Saturn, 1 person picked Earth.
30:18All right, one more.
30:20And it's worth a whopping three points.
30:23This is a big one.
30:24Yep.
30:24Last question.
30:27We asked 100 average Americans, which of these is the most iconic Disney moment?
30:35Sharing spaghetti?
30:37The circle of life?
30:39C, carpet ride?
30:41D, glass sipper?
30:43Slipper.
30:4510 seconds.
30:47Glass.
30:47Slipper.
30:48That's how you say it.
30:51Last question.
30:58Kevin, what'd you say?
31:00So, I decided to go with B, circle of life.
31:04I'd love it to be carpet ride, because my dogs are named Aladdin and Jasmine, and it's perfect.
31:10But it can't be that.
31:11And glass slipper, it's cute, but I feel like the circle of life is current.
31:15It's now, so I picked B, circle of life.
31:18Yeah, good answer.
31:19We almost want to put you in a bottle and sell you, buddy.
31:22You're nothing but fun.
31:23Uh, Natalie, what did you say?
31:25I disagree on the glass slipper.
31:27I went with D.
31:28I think this is iconic.
31:29As iconic.
31:29It is a little tough, though.
31:30Sharing spaghetti, I will say I felt torn between that one.
31:33That's a tough one.
31:34That's also iconic.
31:35That's an old school one.
31:36Armani, I imagine you've seen every Disney movie.
31:41What did you say?
31:41So, I went B, circle of life, and I actually did this last night at a bar, because someone
31:46had the bright idea of jumping, and I caught them and literally quite, and held them right here.
31:50Just like that.
31:50That exact moment, I think it's the most iconic.
31:53I like that your answer's based off, truly, you're like, well, I've done that one the most
31:57recent.
31:59All right, it's all coming down to this.
32:01Armani, two points.
32:02Natalie, two points.
32:03Kevin, one point.
32:04This is a big one.
32:06What did the average American say?
32:12Sharon Spaghetti.
32:13Wow.
32:14Why?
32:15Congratulations, Armani and Natalie, you're moving on.
32:19Unfortunately, Kevin, you are the most below-average American tonight.
32:24Thanks for playing.
32:25When we come back, the quest to crown the greatest average American continues.
32:30Our players have proven their averageness.
32:32And now it's my turn.
32:34Do not go anywhere.
32:37Give us some more!
32:38Give us some more!
32:44Welcome back to The Greatest Average American.
32:47Armani and Natalie are one step closer to playing for the average American salary of $67,920.
32:58This next round is all about getting into the mind and body of the original Greatest Average
33:03American himself, and that is me.
33:06Let's see what I am doing tonight.
33:10Best-selling musical artist.
33:17I will have 60 seconds to name as many artists as I can who are included in the top 100
33:23best-selling
33:24artists of all time, according to the Recording Industry Association of America.
33:29I will have to give full names here, and we're talking about both bands and individual artists.
33:37And to figure out who's going to the bonus round, you two are predicting how well I'm going to do.
33:43Armani, you get to decide.
33:45Would you like to guess the number I will name or guess the over-under?
33:49Nate, I think I'm going to have you guess the over-under.
33:54You're going to guess the over.
33:55You've got to do it right now, even though you don't know a number.
33:57No, I'm joking.
33:58I'm joking.
33:58I'm joking.
33:59Natalie, how many best-selling artists do you think I can name in 60 seconds?
34:04Write it down.
34:06Nate's parents did not let him listen to rock and roll, so if he knows a lot of these, he's
34:11going to get grounded.
34:14Very true.
34:15Top 100 based on album sales.
34:18How many do you think I can guess?
34:20Don't show me or say it out loud.
34:23Armani, do you think I will go over that number or under it?
34:27Write it down.
34:28Don't show anyone.
34:31It's my time to shine, Greg.
34:34It's my time to shine, Greg.
34:35A little help.
34:36Good luck, Nate.
34:37Can we put 60 seconds on the clock?
34:40On your mark.
34:42Get set.
34:43Nate!
34:44Madonna.
34:45Ariana.
34:46Ariana Grande.
34:47The Beatles.
34:49Cat Stevens.
34:51That's my dad.
34:53Michael Jackson.
34:55Paul McCartney.
34:5945 seconds.
35:01Carpenter.
35:01Sabrina Carpenter.
35:02Uh, uh, uh, uh, man.
35:06I know, it's crazy.
35:08It's crazy when you've got to name them out.
35:10Uh, there's the number one.
35:12Rolling Stones.
35:13Uh, the, uh...
35:1530 seconds.
35:16The, uh...
35:16You have four.
35:18Uh, Nirvana.
35:20Uh, Tim McGraw.
35:22Uh, Kenny Chesney.
35:24Uh, uh, Billy Ray Cyrus.
35:29Uh...
35:2915 seconds.
35:31You have seven.
35:32Seven.
35:32Man.
35:33Uh...
35:34Uh, Michael W. Smith.
35:39Uh...
35:39Amy Grant.
35:40Amy Grant.
35:41Sandy Patty.
35:42Three.
35:43Uh...
35:43Two.
35:45Golly.
35:46I know.
35:47I'm sorry.
35:49I'm sorry.
35:51All right.
35:51Sorry.
35:52I'm...
35:53I really...
35:54My parents didn't let me listen to a lot of stuff,
35:56so I'm not...
35:57You're grown now.
35:59What do you mean?
35:59I know, but I'm, you know,
36:01I still follow by their rules.
36:03All right.
36:03I got seven.
36:05That's pretty good for a guy not born in this country.
36:10Natalie.
36:11How many did you think I could do?
36:13I had full confidence in you.
36:15Yeah.
36:15I said 35.
36:1735!
36:20There it is.
36:2135.
36:21That's very nice.
36:22I had confidence.
36:23That's wonderful of you.
36:25Armani, if you guessed under, you win.
36:28But if it's over, then you're going home.
36:30What did you say?
36:33I'm not going home today.
36:35Under!
36:37That means Armani is moving on.
36:41Congratulations.
36:43You're the greatest average American.
36:45You deserve a little something to go to your new title.
36:47How does $10,000 sound?
36:49That is good.
36:52But can you turn it into $67,920?
36:58Let's go!
36:59Find out in the bonus round
37:01when we return to the greatest average American.
37:05Let's win!
37:11Welcome back.
37:13I'm here with our winner, Armani.
37:15He has earned the coveted title
37:17of the greatest average American.
37:19And with that comes $10,000.
37:22Woo-hoo!
37:25That's yours to keep no matter what.
37:27But you know you have a chance to increase it
37:29to the average American salary of $67,920.
37:34Yeah!
37:35And I'm going to put a little extra in there
37:37to help cover all your taxes.
37:39That's right.
37:40Let's do it, baby.
37:41Let's do it.
37:42Let's do it.
37:43What, uh, what will you do with it if you win?
37:46So, my mother is the most important person
37:49to me in this world.
37:50That's beautiful.
37:50And I'm a mechanic.
37:52I love cars.
37:53I want to buy her the first car she ever bought,
37:56which was a 1988 Nissan 200SX,
37:59build it to the way that she had it as her first car,
38:00and basically give it to her,
38:02and she could drive off into the sunset.
38:03She'd be happy and be proud of me.
38:04Oh, that's beautiful, man.
38:05That's beautiful.
38:07Let's hope that happens.
38:09You showed you can think like the average American,
38:11but there's one more group of average Americans
38:13you need to face,
38:14and that is our audience here.
38:19Before the show, we asked them seven questions.
38:22You will have 30 seconds to correctly predict
38:25how the majority of them answered.
38:27Get five right,
38:28and you'll go home with $67,920.
38:34That's the goal.
38:35But beware, because it's three strikes,
38:38and you're out.
38:39Audience, it's your answers that are helping win this money,
38:42so you should have some skin in the game.
38:44If Armani wins,
38:45you're all going home with one of my favorite things.
38:47Julian, what are they getting?
38:49Crumble cookies.
38:50Cookies from crumble.
38:51Crumble.
38:53That is one of my favorite things.
38:55I love how they spell crumble.
38:57It's how it should be spelled.
38:58All right.
38:59Feel good?
39:00That's right.
39:01There we go.
39:01That's right.
39:02Here we go.
39:02Here we go, baby.
39:03You ready?
39:04I'm ready.
39:0530 seconds on the clock.
39:07Please.
39:09Here we go.
39:11Where would this audience rather go on vacation?
39:14Hawaii, Florida.
39:15Florida.
39:18Do they think there's life on other planets?
39:21No.
39:23When their alarm goes off,
39:24do they hit the snooze button?
39:26Yes.
39:28Which do they prefer, dogs or cats?
39:30Dogs.
39:32Do they keep their Christmas tree up past New Year's?
39:35No.
39:37Do they drive an American car?
39:38Yes.
39:40Have they ever had to run through an airport to catch a flight?
39:43Yes.
39:44We got them.
39:45All seven questions.
39:46There we go.
39:49All right.
39:49You need five of them to win.
39:50Let's take a look at your answers.
39:52Where would this audience rather go on vacation?
39:56Armani, you said Florida.
39:58Did the audience say Florida?
40:00No.
40:00Probably said Hawaii.
40:02All right.
40:03I knew it.
40:04Yeah.
40:05That's all right.
40:06Hawaii is where they want to go.
40:08Florida is reality.
40:12Do they think there's life on other planets?
40:15You said no.
40:16Audience, did you also say no?
40:20Oh, they said yes.
40:21Oh, man.
40:22That's a tough one.
40:23Wow.
40:24All right.
40:24All right.
40:25You need this one to be right.
40:27When their alarm goes off, do they hit the snooze button?
40:30You said yes.
40:31Audience, please be normal.
40:32Did you also say yes?
40:36There we go.
40:37There we go.
40:41Which do they prefer, dogs or cats?
40:44You said they prefer dogs.
40:46Audience, did you prefer dogs?
40:49There we go.
40:50We got two.
40:51We got two.
40:55You got three left.
40:56Which one of these do you feel the best about?
40:59We can open whichever.
41:00Seven.
41:00You're with seven.
41:01You knew already.
41:02You need this one to be right.
41:04Have they ever had to run through an airport to catch a flight?
41:08You said yes.
41:09Audience, what did you say?
41:15Yes.
41:21Final two questions.
41:22We need both these to be right.
41:24Let's go for six.
41:25You want to go for six?
41:26All right.
41:28Do they drive an American car?
41:32You need this to stay alive?
41:35You said yes.
41:37Did they say yes?
41:44Oh, my gosh.
41:46Bet they keep their Christmas tree up past New Year's, too.
41:49They probably do.
41:50Yeah, they do.
41:50Of course they do.
41:53Of course they do.
41:53Yeah.
41:53But you're still going home with $10,000.
41:55That's great.
41:59Better luck next time, audience.
42:01No crumbled gift cards for any of you.
42:05Join us next time to watch another Average American Rise to Greatness right here on The Greatest Average American.
42:13Good night.
42:17Dude, that's the only thing, man.
42:19That happens.
42:20I could have won with my gut feeling.
42:33I could have won.
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