00:00So Iran's war is unfolding like my uncle's wedding buffet chaotic, endless, and everyone's
00:06fighting over oil instead of biryani.
00:08Reports say Iran's ballistic missiles are under 1,000, drone attacks are tapering, and
00:13the US claims operations could last for minus six weeks.
00:17Meanwhile, global oil markets are sweating harder than me in a polyester suit callback.
00:23If this war lasts longer than my Netflix free trial, somebody better start rationing popcorn.
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