- vor 3 Wochen
Evil Bong is a 2006 American stoner horror comedy film directed by Charles Band about a group of stoners who smoke from a sentient, malevolent bong that traps the smoker in The Bong World, a surreal realm filled with killer strippers and other Full Moon creatures. The ending features an extended cameo by Tommy Chong, of Cheech & Chong fame. Brandi Cunningham from VH1's Rock of Love with Bret Michaels and horror icon Bill Moseley also make appearances in the film, which spawned a franchise of sequels.
Plot
Nerdy college student Alistair McDowell moves in with law school drop-out Larnell, and his current roommates typical "surfer-stoner" Bachman and former baseball player Brett. When Larnell sees an ad for a large bong that the previous owner claims was "possessed", he responds. They receive the bong and start smoking (with the exception of Alistair). Alistair meets Brett's girlfriend Luann and her friend Janet, who Alistair develops a crush on.
Later that night, Bachman's soul is pulled into The Bong World, which takes the form of a hellish strip club, inside Evil Bong, where he meets Ooga Booga and Ivan Burroughs, who warns him to watch himself around the Evil Bong. He is introduced to one of the strippers (Kristen Caldwell) who has skulls on her bra that start biting his neck, killing him, while Ooga Booga watches on, masturbating. The next morning, the other roommates find Bachman dead on the couch. Alistair tells them that it is probably from the weed, but Larnell points out they all smoked the weed. Larnell also notices that the bong has changed; a face has started to appear. The trio hide his body and are nearly caught when Larnell's paralyzed, wealthy grandfather, Cyril, comes by to tell Larnell that he just got remarried.
Plot
Nerdy college student Alistair McDowell moves in with law school drop-out Larnell, and his current roommates typical "surfer-stoner" Bachman and former baseball player Brett. When Larnell sees an ad for a large bong that the previous owner claims was "possessed", he responds. They receive the bong and start smoking (with the exception of Alistair). Alistair meets Brett's girlfriend Luann and her friend Janet, who Alistair develops a crush on.
Later that night, Bachman's soul is pulled into The Bong World, which takes the form of a hellish strip club, inside Evil Bong, where he meets Ooga Booga and Ivan Burroughs, who warns him to watch himself around the Evil Bong. He is introduced to one of the strippers (Kristen Caldwell) who has skulls on her bra that start biting his neck, killing him, while Ooga Booga watches on, masturbating. The next morning, the other roommates find Bachman dead on the couch. Alistair tells them that it is probably from the weed, but Larnell points out they all smoked the weed. Larnell also notices that the bong has changed; a face has started to appear. The trio hide his body and are nearly caught when Larnell's paralyzed, wealthy grandfather, Cyril, comes by to tell Larnell that he just got remarried.
Kategorie
🎥
KurzfilmeTranskript
00:00:15Wicked We
00:00:58Wicked We
00:01:01Wicked We
00:01:14Wicked We
00:01:15Wicked We
00:01:16Wicked We
00:01:16Wicked We
00:01:17Wicked We
00:01:17Wicked We
00:01:18Wicked We
00:01:18Wicked We
00:01:18Wicked We
00:01:19Wicked We
00:01:19Wicked We
00:01:20Wicked We
00:01:20Wicked We
00:01:20Wicked We
00:01:21Wicked We
00:01:22Wicked We
00:01:22Wicked We
00:01:53Whoa!
00:02:02Devil, do you approve?
00:02:04I did it all for you.
00:02:06Well, mostly you.
00:02:08Do you like it?
00:02:24What?
00:02:41Welcome.
00:02:46Man, we thought you'd never open.
00:02:48You must have been waiting right outside the door.
00:02:50For, like, ever.
00:02:52Yeah, we tried to make it in time, but the store just...
00:02:55closed.
00:02:57So we thought we'd just wait outside until it opened again.
00:03:02It's been closed since 420.
00:03:04Yeah.
00:03:06Last year.
00:03:09Yeah.
00:03:11That's cool.
00:03:12We took a nap and shit.
00:03:17I don't remember this place being so... scary.
00:03:21What's up with all the spooky kooky?
00:03:24I wanted this place to reflect my soul.
00:03:27Dark and scary as fuck!
00:03:33And, you know, for Satan.
00:03:39Uh...
00:03:40Yes?
00:03:40You have a stupid question and or stupid comment?
00:03:45Yes.
00:03:51Then ask it.
00:03:53Why are you way hotter than you were before?
00:03:58Before what?
00:04:00Last time we were here, you were a douchey young dickhead.
00:04:05And also...
00:04:07A bald asshole.
00:04:08Okay, firstly, those weren't me.
00:04:11Those were the previous owners.
00:04:12I bought the place in a fire sale.
00:04:14Like, literally.
00:04:15It was on fucking fire.
00:04:17I'm the new owner, Lucy Furr.
00:04:19Oh, and FYI, I was never not hot.
00:04:22You're totally skirting the question, dude.
00:04:25Busted, your honor.
00:04:27The only thing busted around here is my ass trying to reopen the store.
00:04:31All new look.
00:04:32All new merch.
00:04:39Knew it, dude.
00:04:42I'm sorry.
00:04:43Um...
00:04:44Perhaps...
00:04:44Maybe there's something I could...
00:04:49Let me rephrase that.
00:04:50What the hell do you guys want?
00:04:53We want to suck it up.
00:04:55Smoke it up.
00:04:58And get fucked up.
00:05:00Yeah.
00:05:01We want to get stoked up.
00:05:03Choked out.
00:05:05And...
00:05:08And...
00:05:08What was that thing you said?
00:05:10Get high as a kite.
00:05:12That's right.
00:05:14Oh.
00:05:14That I can help with.
00:05:17Right on, evil woman.
00:05:18Get us baked.
00:05:20And don't de-laked.
00:05:22Enough with the rhyme, Slimes.
00:05:24You got money or you're not.
00:05:27Ugh.
00:05:28I knew it.
00:05:29Beat feet.
00:05:32He's the bank, skank.
00:05:33That's right.
00:05:36Unlike Fort Cox.
00:05:41Remind me never to make a withdrawal.
00:05:47You know what?
00:05:48It's not that you guys aren't good for it, because obviously you are.
00:05:53But I'm going to do something I've never done before.
00:05:59Take a shower with a sumo wrestler.
00:06:02No.
00:06:04No.
00:06:05I'm going to be nice for once.
00:06:07The first one is free.
00:06:10Yeah.
00:06:12Spread that love, baby.
00:06:13Yeah, spread it all over.
00:06:16I'm talking about the weed.
00:06:18The first toke is free.
00:06:20First toke?
00:06:21No joke.
00:06:22I never joke.
00:06:23Fuck that shit.
00:06:24Fucking jokes.
00:06:26Anyway, let me show you our specials.
00:06:28You can't find them anywhere else.
00:06:30I've searched the darkest, deepest places on earth to find the most unique streams.
00:06:37Places most fear to tread.
00:06:40Many entered, but...
00:06:42Do you return?
00:06:43The Congo?
00:06:45The Amazon?
00:06:46The valley.
00:06:52So what will it be, sirs?
00:06:54I've got Evie Kush.
00:06:58Gingerweed.
00:07:02And Banzooka.
00:07:05They all look so, like...
00:07:09Likeable.
00:07:10I don't think I could ever choose.
00:07:13Can we just, like, try them all?
00:07:15Look, I'm being nice here.
00:07:17I'm not motherfucking Santa Claus.
00:07:21Okay, uh...
00:07:22Ladies choice, then.
00:07:25Smart choice.
00:07:26Well, I just happen to have...
00:07:28some Evie Kush, packed and ready to go.
00:07:32Okay, bring it to Papa.
00:07:41Ooh!
00:07:42Ooh!
00:07:46You like it?
00:07:48Oh, that's smooth.
00:07:50This is the most rad weed ever.
00:07:53I know.
00:07:54Just don't get it in your eyes.
00:08:02What?
00:08:02That...
00:08:03packs a whammy.
00:08:10What?
00:08:11Little plagues?
00:08:18Dang it.
00:08:27That devil powder really worked.
00:08:29Technically he's dead, but...
00:08:31You can do my bidding for Satan's army.
00:08:32You can do my bidding for Satan's army.
00:08:34Oh my God!
00:08:41I'm sorry!
00:08:53I'm sorry!
00:09:04I'M THAT MOTHERFUCKER!
00:09:08BITCH!
00:09:08What's the actual fuck?
00:09:10You a lesbo?
00:09:12No, why?
00:09:13Cause you done snatched me!
00:09:15Oh, that's gross.
00:09:17Hey, you're like the knick-knacks on the shelf.
00:09:19Knick-knack, patty-whack, shut your fucking mouth!
00:09:22Those high-end statues were my last grand idea to take over the world!
00:09:27And I would have done it, too, if it weren't for those meddling dipshits!
00:09:30Say what?
00:09:32I'm Evie, bitch!
00:09:36The Evil Bong!
00:09:40Yeah, weed's legal in most states now, so not so scary.
00:09:44You done Botoxed your brain, girl!
00:09:46Evie's the name of the store!
00:09:48Ah, you're slow, but you do come around!
00:09:52Save that giggling shit!
00:09:54Don't work on me!
00:09:55Do I look like I got a desperate dick?
00:09:58Okay.
00:09:59What was happening?
00:10:00I was stuck in sexy hell.
00:10:02No thanks to that walking boner, rabbit!
00:10:05Like, the cute little fuzzy kind?
00:10:06Or that gross man I bought the store off of?
00:10:09There ain't nothing cute about rabbit.
00:10:11Gotcha.
00:10:11I don't know how that cue ball did it, but he somehow sucked me into his empty ass head.
00:10:16Then, I took a wrong turn to a place called sexy hell!
00:10:20Sounds kinda hot.
00:10:21Girl, my bong water boiled all day and night!
00:10:25I mean, it sounds so sexy.
00:10:27Hmm, it's called sexy hell, but you don't want no part of that shit!
00:10:32Or maybe you do, ya freaky ass!
00:10:35So by offering that hesher, I opened the portal to sexy hell?
00:10:39Lord knows I've killed my share, but no portal opened up because of it!
00:10:42You did a nice number on that dude, by the way.
00:10:46I love my work.
00:10:48That's it!
00:10:49It wasn't just the killing that opened the portal.
00:10:52It's that your nasty cooch was slobbering while you did it!
00:10:56The more you kill, the bigger the portal, so you and your gazoongas can fit through!
00:11:02Bitch, you got some major fucking daddy issues, but I can work with that.
00:11:06How so?
00:11:07Help me enslave the world!
00:11:08And you can help me sacrifice more people so I can open a portal to sexy hell?
00:11:12I wanna see Satan.
00:11:14I'm like his number one fan.
00:11:16Pack your bags, bitch!
00:11:19Oh yeah, they're packed.
00:11:28Who the fuck is this?
00:11:29Her name is Luann.
00:11:31I'm Batty Poop!
00:11:33Stop trying to be Batty!
00:11:35Aw, but I am Batty!
00:11:37Bat shit crazy maybe, but you are not her!
00:11:43If I ever see Junia kill Julie again, I'm gonna break you in half!
00:11:50Oh, really?
00:11:52Take that to the bank!
00:11:57Ahhhh!
00:12:00Ahhhh!
00:12:07It's enough!
00:12:12Nobody's leaving Batty Poop in the corner!
00:12:16Well, that's gonna leave a boob egg.
00:12:22You can't just wake me out like that.
00:12:27I have stories to tell.
00:12:29I have something to say.
00:12:32Who...
00:12:32Who am I?
00:12:39Hello?
00:12:45Where's Kildoy?
00:12:48Kildoy?
00:12:51Where am I?
00:12:54My boob.
00:13:00You just sit right there. Leave it to me.
00:13:03Girl, knock yourself out.
00:13:05You won't hear a peep from my ass.
00:13:07Today's my big grand opening.
00:13:08There's so many victims. Customers, whatever.
00:13:12Don't worry, you tits. You'll make a killing.
00:13:15Ah!
00:13:16Oh!
00:13:17Oh!
00:13:17Oh!
00:13:25Oh!
00:13:39Oh!
00:13:40Oh!
00:13:42Oh!
00:13:44Oh!
00:13:45Oh!
00:13:47Oh!
00:13:50Oh!
00:13:52Oh!
00:13:53Oh!
00:13:53Oh!
00:13:54Oh!
00:13:55Oh!
00:13:57Oh!
00:13:58Oh!
00:14:02Oh!
00:14:04Oh!
00:14:06Oh!
00:14:09Oh!
00:14:12Oh!
00:14:27Ah! That boob-headed boob thinks I'm gonna help her sacrifice, people?
00:14:36That's some shit right there.
00:14:38Dead people of no use to me.
00:14:40I need strong backs and weak minds to pump full of my magic weed.
00:14:47So I can take over this damn place.
00:14:49Gotta figure out a way.
00:14:51What to fucking do?
00:14:53I think God smokes weed.
00:14:56And he was highway, baby.
00:15:00And I think he gave up halfway.
00:15:14Thanks, man.
00:15:20That's it?
00:15:33Happy now?
00:15:37Hardly.
00:15:40Get the hell out of here, you first out of here, baby.
00:15:43That's false advertisement.
00:15:45I'll get you in trouble with the law.
00:15:47Cuties.
00:15:49I totally suck.
00:15:50Yeah, so does your sign.
00:15:53Fuck, you got a hole in it.
00:15:59Maybe I should make an adjustment.
00:16:01Yeah.
00:16:02I'm gonna take that out of here.
00:16:06Hey.
00:16:07Fair for that.
00:16:09No thanks, I'm not hungry.
00:16:14Finally!
00:16:15No, I'm a little licking people.
00:16:18No!
00:16:24I'm not hungry.
00:16:27No, I'm not hungry.
00:16:28No, I'm not hungry.
00:16:29No, I'm not hungry.
00:16:29No, I'm not hungry.
00:16:30No, I'm not hungry.
00:16:32No, I'm not hungry.
00:16:39I love you.
00:16:41Oh, wait.
00:16:43I know you.
00:16:44Oh, I know you.
00:16:47You work with Killjoy.
00:16:49Can you take me to him?
00:16:53Can you show me where he is?
00:16:56Please.
00:16:57We don't work there anymore.
00:16:59We're out on the streets now.
00:17:00He's a freaky fellow who juggles a chainsaw.
00:17:03Yeah, can you take me there?
00:17:06No.
00:17:09I don't even know.
00:17:11I forgot to boop, boop, boop.
00:17:19Can you at least take me to the set?
00:17:26I still love you, but no.
00:17:30Where am I?
00:17:32Venice.
00:17:33Venus?
00:17:35Oh, boop.
00:17:37I must have made a wrong turn at Mars.
00:17:40Wrong turn at Uranus.
00:17:42You know.
00:17:43Don't talk about the woman I love that way.
00:17:49Boop.
00:17:54I hope I didn't just kill
00:17:55one of my only two customers.
00:18:03It's you.
00:18:10In the flesh.
00:18:12FYI, there can be a lot more of that,
00:18:16if you know what I mean.
00:18:17I don't.
00:18:20Flesh.
00:18:21A lot.
00:18:22Yeah, I seriously doubt it.
00:18:24And, uh, uh, God, please don't.
00:18:26Just thought I'd put it out there.
00:18:29Okay, we'll put it back.
00:18:31God, put it way back, perv!
00:18:33Huh?
00:18:34My face.
00:18:35Hello.
00:18:35The thing that's talking?
00:18:38Oh.
00:18:39Yeah.
00:18:40I don't like to bog myself down with details.
00:18:45What do you want?
00:18:47I just thought I'd drop by and see how it's going.
00:18:51Big day.
00:18:52First day and all.
00:18:53Yeah, okay.
00:18:54You're the only person to walk in here,
00:18:56um, if anyone asks.
00:18:58Well, that's a good omen for any entrepreneur.
00:19:03Yeah, you know, actually,
00:19:04I looked you up at the Better Business Bureau.
00:19:06Mm, not so much.
00:19:09Details.
00:19:10Details.
00:19:15Ah.
00:19:16Hello, ladies.
00:19:17Let me know if you have any questions.
00:19:20I almost did.
00:19:21I almost did.
00:19:24Rabbit wanna grab it.
00:19:28I think I'll peruse your merchandise.
00:19:32Is, um, something you like?
00:19:35Is there, uh, something you wanna try that I have?
00:19:38Maybe.
00:19:39Sentences, ladies.
00:19:40They're the backbone of communication.
00:19:49Can you show me that Y?
00:19:52You've heard it gets you free weed.
00:19:54Just for tokes.
00:19:56Yeah, that worked with the old, disgusting owner,
00:19:59but, uh, I kinda have two of my own.
00:20:05Ladies, if I may,
00:20:07your actions were commendable,
00:20:10and so are your hooties,
00:20:14and I want you to know
00:20:15that it was all not for naught.
00:20:20You're free weed?
00:20:23Not exactly.
00:20:25And then what exactly?
00:20:29Rabbit wanna grab it.
00:20:31Screw you.
00:20:32Grab yourself, dickhead.
00:20:35Talk about mixed messages.
00:20:38I don't know.
00:20:39Seemed pretty clear to me.
00:20:42Do you have a partner?
00:20:46Larnell?
00:20:47Yeah, what happened to him?
00:20:49He was accidentally dispatched.
00:20:54You mean like you sent him to a satellite location?
00:20:57Well, he...
00:20:59was certainly in a cosmic place.
00:21:05Okay, and when's a space cadet getting back?
00:21:09He's not coming back.
00:21:12Ever.
00:21:22Oh, it's cute.
00:21:27Oh, I want one.
00:21:29Jeffy, will you buy me something?
00:21:30Buy everything.
00:21:31I want it.
00:21:32I want it.
00:21:32I want it.
00:21:34Welcome.
00:21:35If you're actually here to buy something.
00:21:38I'm not a customer.
00:21:39Okay, then what are you?
00:21:40This is my lovely trophy for Snatchy.
00:21:45The pleasure's all yours.
00:21:50Don't smudge the mani, darling.
00:21:53I'm Jeff.
00:21:54I came to gloat.
00:21:55Where's Larnell?
00:21:57You know, that's an interesting question.
00:21:59I'm not really sure.
00:22:00Hi, lap dog.
00:22:01I mean, Jeff.
00:22:04Greetings, fool.
00:22:05Where's your owner?
00:22:07Grandpa's no longer with us.
00:22:09You mean he's...
00:22:10Yes, he's gone off on another adventure.
00:22:19Jeffy, will you buy me something?
00:22:21Please, please, please, please, please, please, please.
00:22:24You like what you see?
00:22:26I like the best.
00:22:28Do you have the best?
00:22:30I've got the fucking best.
00:22:32Mm-hmm.
00:22:34Oh.
00:22:36Hmm.
00:22:38Does this, um, come in blingy?
00:22:42Whatever.
00:22:43I'll want it.
00:22:44He'll pay.
00:22:45Larnell, where is he?
00:22:48Larnell's on a trip.
00:22:50A very bad trip.
00:22:53Shame.
00:22:55I wanted to rub my perfect life in his face.
00:22:59What an asshole.
00:23:01Kick a man while he's down.
00:23:03Right in the balls.
00:23:04Okay.
00:23:05Let's give it a try.
00:23:24Oh.
00:23:30That's rich.
00:23:32You want it?
00:23:34anything my dear. No I want it. I want it now. Well like me the lady gets what she
00:23:47wants so that's gonna be it for us. Thank you for the opportunity. Good luck with
00:23:52everything and have a nice day.
00:23:59A cute couple.
00:24:06It's a boobie.
00:24:10Step up. Madame Mystica will show you the way. You can show me the way? Always. Oh please
00:24:21a wobble call. Where's Killjoy? Where the hell is Lornelle? Who? What? Lornelle. What the boob? I meant...
00:24:31I don't even know what I meant. Never fear. Madame Mystica is here. And taking tips.
00:24:46That's weird. Is that bad? Beats me this is a lawn ornament from the dollar store.
00:24:56But it must be trying to tell us something. Why is it so smoky?
00:25:06It can only mean one thing. And that is? Evie's weed dispensary. Just opened up down the street.
00:25:15Can you point me the way? I'll take you there. It's time for my break anyway.
00:25:23Really? Oh you are a lifesaver. You really are. But we gotta get you out of those clothes before
00:25:29they put you to work down here. I know a place. Okay.
00:25:53You're back? What do you mean? We've never been here before. You were just...
00:26:02Never mind. It's not gonna work here. But you know there is something I'd like to show you.
00:26:12May I introduce you to the vapor cup? What is it? It's the best vaporizer on the planet. What does
00:26:20it do?
00:26:21All you have to do is turn it on, pack it up, and vape it. And the best part is,
00:26:27no one even knows you're doing it.
00:26:45Can I try? Fine, just let him. I hate you.
00:27:01That's a high, take a high. I love it. You like it?
00:27:09Futuristic.
00:27:14It's good, right? I'll take that as it is. We'll take two.
00:27:20Okay. Let me just ring that up right here.
00:27:28And it's gonna be a hundred and ninety-nine each. Anyway.
00:27:48You're at it. I gotta go in the back and do something. You can watch them for a minute.
00:27:54Can you watch yourself, too, while you're at it?
00:28:09God! I can't stand all these idiots.
00:28:13Everything's going according to plan, honey.
00:28:15No! It's just a bunch of cheap morons and derelicts. I'm so gonna whack all of them.
00:28:21Ooh, baby, just slow your roll, sweet ass. You'll get your chance.
00:28:25But it's not like it was last time. I can't get them separate enough to do the deed.
00:28:30And worst of all...
00:28:31You found a conscience somewhere in those boobs?
00:28:34God, no. It's all those stupid questions.
00:28:40I can't take it.
00:28:42Honey, that's customer service.
00:28:44No. I'm so gonna sacrifice all of them.
00:28:47Whoa! Save your energy for when you need it. And, bitch, you're gonna need it.
00:28:54You're right. I just need to stay calm. I can do this.
00:29:00Now you're using your hair sprayed head. Now go back out there and do your thing.
00:29:05Thanks, E.B.
00:29:06My pleasure, bitch.
00:29:10Hey, ladies. I, uh, I got some killer weed in the back if you want to try it.
00:29:16Yeah. Come on. Totally safe.
00:29:19Come in this back room.
00:29:23Can I try it?
00:29:26No. It's strong enough for a bald-ass orangutan, but it's kind of made for a woman, so I'm sorry.
00:29:41Oh, I needed that. I wanted to do that so bad.
00:29:45Can I, uh...
00:29:46Shh, shh, shh.
00:29:51Oh, that was good. I'm sorry. What were you saying?
00:29:55Where are the girls?
00:29:56Oh, they are gone. They are so far gone. Not that they were there to begin with.
00:30:02Cock.
00:30:03Hey, put it in a jar. You got customers.
00:30:08Welcome.
00:30:11Can I help you?
00:30:12I don't know. I guess.
00:30:14Let me guess. You need something for your, uh, glaucoma?
00:30:18Not really.
00:30:20Okay. You just want to get, like, super high?
00:30:23What he means to say is that he needs something to make Johnny Johnson Jr. become Mr. Johnson
00:30:33until Principal Johnson says it's recess.
00:30:36That's what I meant to say.
00:30:38Uh, yeah, sure. Okay. This is it, then. Perfect. Gotta try it.
00:30:49That works.
00:30:50Hmm. How much?
00:30:52A hundred and ninety-nine.
00:30:57With every penny.
00:31:02Bye.
00:31:21Sarah?
00:31:22You know these people?
00:31:24Uh, yes. Uh, they're old friends of mine. Uh, this is not Sarah, apparently. And, uh,
00:31:34this is Misty. And, uh, this is, uh, Miss Lucifer.
00:31:41I don't suppose you came here to buy anything, either?
00:31:44The road to discovery led us here.
00:31:47Say what?
00:31:47We came here looking for some guy, I think.
00:31:50This guy?
00:31:51Oh, you must be real hard up.
00:31:54You could say that again.
00:31:57But don't.
00:31:58Are you Larnell?
00:31:59All contraire. I'm Rabbit.
00:32:04Larnell.
00:32:05Larnell.
00:32:08Larnell.
00:32:09Gone.
00:32:10Forever?
00:32:14Start talking, Buster.
00:32:16Uh, uh, what topic are we, uh, addressing at this time?
00:32:21Uh, you know exactly what I'm talking about.
00:32:25Where's Larnell?
00:32:26Oh, uh, that.
00:32:28Why am I keep saying that?
00:32:30Spill it, or we spill you.
00:32:32I can't bring Larnell back. It's too risky.
00:32:36I run the risk of bringing back that
00:32:40ginger dead asshole, or
00:32:44she whose name must not be spoken.
00:32:47Ginger dead man and baby?
00:32:50What am I talking about?
00:32:52I was trying to be discreet, but yes, both of those buttholes.
00:33:00So, he's never coming back, and I'll never get back to the ship?
00:33:07Yes, and what?
00:33:10He's so deep in the nothing head that he's never coming back.
00:33:15I wouldn't know how.
00:33:17I don't know how to get back to the ship.
00:33:21Wait a minute.
00:33:22You mean THE evil bong?
00:33:24Shh.
00:33:25The bitch who must not be named.
00:33:29Evie.
00:33:31What's with you girls?
00:33:36Uh, you guys are supposed to be...
00:33:42Boop!
00:33:43They need help.
00:33:45They need to go to the hospital.
00:33:57Hiya, dicks!
00:33:58I told you not to say his name!
00:34:01Fuck this ship!
00:34:04You're all looking a little pastry.
00:34:06What, are you not happy to see me?
00:34:08Not really.
00:34:09We have some unfinished business.
00:34:12You must be Sarah.
00:34:14Oh, I'm not Sarah.
00:34:15Boop!
00:34:17I'm the real Patty!
00:34:44Looks like you guys started the party without me.
00:34:49We definitely need to get them to the hospital.
00:34:52No way!
00:34:53The fun's just getting started.
00:35:01That's right, motherfuckers!
00:35:03Evie's back!
00:35:04Ah!
00:35:04She likes to say that a lot.
00:35:06I told you not to say her name.
00:35:09Can't tell if you fuck buckets are surprised to see me,
00:35:12or if that's just your normal stupid faces.
00:35:14Oh, great.
00:35:15The poopiest party poop.
00:35:17Who do we have here?
00:35:18The ginger little dick man.
00:35:20How the hell did you get here?
00:35:21I whacked a demon in sexy hell and jumped through a flaming pussy.
00:35:24You?
00:35:25This set of tits attached to a pole dragged my ass here.
00:35:31Did you say sexy hell?
00:35:33Yeah, sexy hell.
00:35:35And that's where I'm going, even if I have to whack all of you to do it.
00:35:38Could you just whack me?
00:35:40Rabbit!
00:35:42Just kidding.
00:35:44Our chosen course is the only one to wellness.
00:35:48We're not going anywhere except for the hospital.
00:35:51These girls are barely hanging on.
00:35:53Let me help you get there faster.
00:36:13We're not going anywhere.
00:36:13Bon voyage tits, don't forget to write.
00:36:16How could you?
00:36:17You're a scones throw away from getting it, girly.
00:36:20Don't help that bitch, you pudding head fuck.
00:36:23Dead asses don't help me.
00:36:25Who fucking cares what you want?
00:36:26I'm just happy to be killing again.
00:36:28Makes me feel like a man again.
00:36:31You really are a dumbass.
00:36:32Don't not test me.
00:36:34AHHHH!
00:36:35TITLE, TITLE!
00:36:36We're both in here!
00:36:39TITLE, TITLE, TITLE, TITLE, TITLE!
00:36:45We're both in here!
00:36:46TITLE, TITLE, TITLE, TITLE!
00:36:50You're coming with me.
00:36:52You're coming with me!
00:36:53Hey, hey!
00:36:54I'm not going to drop you lot of shit out you!
00:37:05Ah fuck, I was just gettin' started!
00:37:21This is nonsense!
00:37:23This sucks!
00:37:27Faith is the truth to divinity.
00:37:30And for us, we shall overcome.
00:37:33What?
00:37:34It's cool.
00:37:35We'll figure it out.
00:37:44Sexy hell is fucking rad!
00:37:47No!
00:37:57Bitch!
00:37:58Could you be more of a sorority slut?
00:38:01Shut up.
00:38:01You're spoiling it.
00:38:03You don't tell me to shut up!
00:38:05I tell you to shut up!
00:38:07It's so sexy!
00:38:09It's so sexy!
00:38:10It's so sexy!
00:38:15It's the nuns.
00:38:16They're more than happy to leave you to your own devices.
00:38:18I'm sure there's so many devices here.
00:38:24Who dares horse my fellow?
00:38:36I expected a little more from that voice.
00:38:38Yeah!
00:38:40Yeah!
00:38:40Yeah!
00:38:41Yeah!
00:38:41That's what they all say!
00:38:43Fuck you two!
00:38:45That is no way to talk to a lady!
00:38:49Silence, man!
00:38:51Come on!
00:38:52Who are you?
00:38:54I am Beazel Bud.
00:38:56I preach the sexy hell!
00:39:01Lord of DICKNESS!
00:39:04Ambassador of fucking delicate shit like that!
00:39:23See what I mean?
00:39:29Beazel Bud.
00:39:31On your knees!
00:39:33Okay.
00:39:37I love that shit!
00:39:39Beazel Bud.
00:39:40I am your greatest disciple.
00:39:42I kneel humbly before you.
00:39:43I really love that shit.
00:39:49To make you an offering.
00:39:51Prove your worth, O!
00:39:53Down here, O is a compliment.
00:39:57By the way, it's sexy hell.
00:40:02Hey, hey!
00:40:03No, no, no, no, you dope bitch!
00:40:05You're not gonna offer me up to his ass,
00:40:07cause that's probably where I'll end up.
00:40:09Easy, babe.
00:40:10Exit only.
00:40:11What is she doing?
00:40:13What the hell are you doing?
00:40:15Can you be quiet for a second?
00:40:16You're ruining my moment.
00:40:20So, leave.
00:40:22I might offer you these sacrifices.
00:40:24Sacrifice yourself.
00:40:26Lord, sir, whatever.
00:40:28She would make so much better of a sacrifice than we would.
00:40:32Mm-hmm.
00:40:34Don't get your panties in a while.
00:40:38Yeah.
00:40:39Pants need it.
00:40:41This is sexy hell.
00:40:43We don't do sacrifices here.
00:40:46Take poop of that.
00:40:49We do really fucked up orgies though.
00:40:53Like, really fucked up.
00:40:55They're gross.
00:41:04No sacrifices?
00:41:06Don't you want to take over the world that cast you out?
00:41:09Yeah, I guess so.
00:41:11I've just been too busy banging to get around to it.
00:41:16You know, lots of banging around here.
00:41:18This is sexy hell.
00:41:20No.
00:41:20Eevee is a conduit to the world above.
00:41:22She can open a permanent portal.
00:41:26Interesting.
00:41:27I can leave normal demons.
00:41:30Rule with an iron dick.
00:41:33It'll be sexy hell on earth.
00:41:35Let's do it.
00:41:37Jun-o-lufot.
00:41:42See.
00:41:45Oh, wien.
00:41:50Ew, ew!
00:41:51No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:41:54There's some hard shit right there, man.
00:42:00It's still hotter.
00:42:02Hey, what's with you?
00:42:04I think all them coos be harsh in your harness.
00:42:09Sexy demon.
00:42:11Why don't you help them shed that dutch for a piece of butt?
00:42:19No.
00:42:24No.
00:42:26No.
00:42:27No.
00:42:28No hands.
00:42:30Move me!
00:42:33Touch me!
00:42:34Touch me!
00:42:35Touch me!
00:42:38Touch me!
00:42:41Well, I wasn't expecting that.
00:42:46Damn, that shit pisses me off!
00:42:49She was a hell of a suction!
00:42:54The portal!
00:42:56Hey!
00:42:57Hey!
00:42:58What the fuck now?
00:43:02Yay!
00:43:06Freeze!
00:43:10Oh my god, you suck!
00:43:12I like the sound of that.
00:43:17I'm thinking a sacrifice is on the menu for a change.
00:43:23At least it's not the other thing.
00:43:25After the orgy, of course.
00:43:30This is sexy hell.
00:43:34Go get her.
00:43:36No!
00:43:40No!
00:43:41No!
00:43:41No!
00:43:41It wasn't me!
00:43:44No!
00:43:49Ah shit!
00:43:50The girls are gone!
00:43:52Looks like it's just me and you, dickwad.
00:43:55Wanna play Twister?
00:43:56Nah, fuck that!
00:43:57I'd rather grease ya!
00:44:05Goddamn!
00:44:06Gonna toss my cookies!
00:44:08Speaking of cookies, fuck you!
00:44:11Ah, well, well, well.
00:44:13Look what the cosmic vagina pooped out.
00:44:15Now I can rid myself of the both of you.
00:44:17My ass you will!
00:44:19We need to work together!
00:44:20Bad chance!
00:44:21Every time I see you macaroons, it spells trouble for old Gingy.
00:44:25That punk ass, Bialza bud!
00:44:27Gonna do the nasty to those bitches down there!
00:44:29Ah, who cares?
00:44:30Look, jelly dick.
00:44:32Lucifer is all up in that devil's red ass.
00:44:34They plan on opening that portal for good and kill every last motherfucker on Earth!
00:44:38That's a problem?
00:44:39Sometimes I think that villain in your head is full of shit!
00:44:43Your mission is to get back down to sexy hell and kill their ass!
00:44:47Wow!
00:44:48I'm just like Ramto!
00:44:50Vaporcup!
00:44:53Packed with the finest EB Cush!
00:45:20Wow, this time it's war!
00:45:28Get him, soldier!
00:45:30We may have just sent him on a one-way mission.
00:45:33He's no cream puff!
00:45:35If anybody can do it, it's that crazy motherfucker!
00:45:40I guess we just wait.
00:45:42No time to sit on your dumb ass!
00:45:44One way or the other, that big poontang is gonna open up!
00:45:47We don't know what's coming through it!
00:45:49We need a plan!
00:45:55The fuck you doing?
00:45:57To fight a monster, one must create a monster.
00:46:02Ooh, I like that shit!
00:46:05It tell you how?
00:46:07Weed.
00:46:09Duh.
00:46:17Using only the finest weed on Earth, we will create life!
00:46:22We need to get started.
00:46:24The storm is coming.
00:46:26Right you are, motherfucker!
00:46:28Flour!
00:46:30Flour!
00:46:31Mound sugar!
00:46:32Yellow cake!
00:46:34Eggs!
00:46:36Nuts!
00:46:37More nuts!
00:46:39And now, for the final ingredient!
00:46:43Ginger weed!
00:46:58This shit doesn't look like much!
00:47:00How the fuck is that supposed to help us?
00:47:03Ready!
00:47:06Time to plug him in!
00:47:09Let's bake!
00:47:14Take that motherfucking monster motherfucker!
00:47:18Holy shit!
00:47:19Motherfucking ginger weed!
00:47:21Ginger weed!
00:47:23Ginger weed!
00:47:26Radio weed!
00:47:36Who special is sitting and crying!
00:47:38She's sitting at the bottom of her leg!
00:47:46She doesn't look like a monster.
00:47:48We can't breathe, she is saved.
00:47:50È We need her a mess!
00:47:51Fine, if she's مت ONUtil and got fun!
00:47:52I'm hungry!
00:47:52C'n pale, not just planning!
00:47:54I so want to kill you, but I need Evie to kick the portal open.
00:47:58Wait till I get out of this. You're all gonna get a kick in the nads.
00:48:02Let's start the ceremony. By ceremony, I've fucked up, gross-ass-or-witchy.
00:48:12Turn the lights out and take off all your clothes.
00:48:18I wanna lick you.
00:48:20Ask him.
00:48:22Yeah, well, it was tight.
00:48:26God, what now?
00:48:45Like, where am I?
00:48:50Oh, I wanna jump.
00:48:51Oh, I wanna jump.
00:48:53Anything around.
00:48:56Anything around.
00:49:00Oh, yeah.
00:49:08Oh, yeah.
00:49:10Oh, yeah.
00:49:18Oh, yeah.
00:49:36Oh, yeah.
00:49:38Oh, yeah.
00:49:41Oh, yeah.
00:49:42Oh, yeah.
00:49:43Oh, yeah.
00:49:45Yeah, whatever, man.
00:49:47They've been so unsexy since they've been there.
00:49:50It's been my life's work.
00:49:52But it would be too easy.
00:49:54What do you think, honestly?
00:49:56Just do your thing, man.
00:49:58I wanna get this gross-ass orgy started so that we can go fuck earth in the butt.
00:50:04Yeah, why not?
00:50:07Nobody's killing us today.
00:50:10What would you do?
00:50:11We're getting out of here.
00:50:12Oh, yeah.
00:50:27Doesn't anybody knock anymore, man?
00:50:32Who the fuck are you?
00:50:34Your worst nightmare.
00:50:36I'm Ginger Weedman.
00:50:38I've been sent by mom and dad to save you.
00:50:42Mom and dad?
00:50:44Rabbit and Eevee, how is that even possible?
00:50:47What the fuck is this shit?
00:50:49I believe in wees, not words.
00:50:52I'm sending you back when you came for me, frickin' hippie.
00:51:04Come with weed if you want to live.
00:51:07Do not cross me, asshole.
00:51:09The land is mine.
00:51:10You, sir, must be weedinated.
00:51:24I really hate you, bitches.
00:51:29Likewise, demon crotch.
00:51:31Sicker.
00:51:34Weedersack.
00:51:50Cripes, man.
00:51:51What was in that shit?
00:51:53Me.
00:51:54I feel like I'm rising like a souffle here.
00:51:57To transverse the mission, you must become one with it.
00:52:01What the fuck are you talking about?
00:52:03Aw, he's kind of lovable when he's not so kill-y.
00:52:09Game face, Luanne.
00:52:12Is this real?
00:52:13Oh!
00:52:15Why is that clown walking and torturing?
00:52:16What are you doing there?
00:52:17Whoa!
00:52:19Oh, that didn't...
00:52:20Oh, shit!
00:52:21Ah!
00:52:21This is hurting!
00:52:22This is hurting!
00:52:23Sarah!
00:52:23Sarah, stop!
00:52:24I'm in Luanne!
00:52:25What the fuck made me go by?
00:52:27Oh, God!
00:52:27This is hurting!
00:52:29Oh, no, no, I see!
00:52:35Oh, I've never seen you like that.
00:52:47Hey, no, me neither.
00:52:48Sometimes I get so rrrr, I don't even recognize myself.
00:52:53Cool.
00:52:53Now to ease out of here, we can start that little domination thing.
00:52:57What about the origin?
00:52:58No time, babe.
00:53:00No, you promised me a gross-ass origin!
00:53:05Relax, man.
00:53:07We're just gonna get on out of here.
00:53:10Nah, man.
00:53:11You ain't going nowhere.
00:53:15At least not alive.
00:53:18Oh, see, that sounds cool.
00:53:20Everything sounds sexy coming from me.
00:53:23Yeah, yeah.
00:53:24It's sexy hell, we know.
00:53:27How about we settle this like things?
00:53:30What are you offering?
00:53:32Easy, Weedsy.
00:53:34If I win, I take the girls home with me.
00:53:38And if I win, because I win...
00:53:42Then the girls stay here with you forever.
00:53:48Ah, nah, not good enough, man.
00:53:51All right, and I will remain your prisoner for eternity.
00:53:56Not the words I want to hear.
00:53:59I don't know what you mean.
00:54:01We will all be sexy.
00:54:04Now you're talking my language.
00:54:09How do we settle it?
00:54:11How else?
00:54:12An old-fashioned takeoff.
00:54:14How else?
00:54:19How else?
00:54:19Sexy hills, yeah!
00:54:22What the hell?
00:54:23It's time to play.
00:54:26It's time to smoke makeup.
00:54:29It's time to play.
00:54:32She wants a great swisher.
00:54:35I kind of like her, but don't miss her.
00:54:38When she's gone, the bombs on my window.
00:54:41Still on the real hill, I really don't kiss her.
00:54:43She got cotton mouth.
00:54:45I put my cock in mouth, trying to get some dough.
00:54:48But she always got that smoking mouth.
00:54:50Puff, puff, puff, puff, puff.
00:54:51Don't pass me.
00:54:53Shut the buff.
00:54:53The time.
00:54:55We don't die.
00:54:57It's time to play.
00:55:00It's time to play.
00:55:03It's time to play.
00:55:05Picture Hallow, Mr. Hollywood.
00:55:07Rolling up for Hollywood.
00:55:09I like a grand montage, monologue, grandstanding ovals.
00:55:12The coach got our most soccer souffle.
00:55:14Luke Lee, regardless of Snoop, saying he Cool J, Cool J, set it off for Cool J.
00:55:19Not bad.
00:55:19You were kidding me.
00:55:21Blown away, baby.
00:55:23Oh, man.
00:55:24That's going to be hard to see.
00:55:25I need to move A, document style.
00:55:28You haul, we move weight.
00:55:29Garth speed, call C's like the dawn.
00:55:31Let the ball breathe.
00:55:32Grace speed, coming through a stain, but he aced it.
00:55:35Beginner's luck with the winner, boy, in a different line.
00:55:38Spaceships, kiss the lips to her with a wishy pop.
00:55:41When I light up in the club, they surround like true blood.
00:55:46Cause my cushion, champagne, lemonade.
00:55:49Watch me activate your receptors, blow your mind like a grenade.
00:55:53With the bomb sativa, listen to the roof of the receiver.
00:55:56Make you a believer.
00:55:58When I meditate, I medicate it.
00:56:01I'm trying to get my magical magnetic.
00:56:03Get shot.
00:56:04Get your weed.
00:56:05Get me.
00:56:07Get me.
00:56:08Come on, little weedie.
00:56:10You can do it.
00:56:12Mm-hmm.
00:56:12Put a little power to it.
00:56:15How do we know who wins this thing?
00:56:17Oh, looks like they're having some fun.
00:56:42Do it.
00:56:53Holy shit.
00:57:12Oh, Weedy.
00:57:15I'm your biggest deal, Weedy.
00:57:19We got Weedy.
00:57:27We got Weedy.
00:57:27We got Weedy.
00:57:29We got Weedy.
00:57:30We got Weedy.
00:57:35That's sexy, though.
00:57:42I love you, Weedy.
00:57:47Weedy.
00:57:54Oh, I knew you could do it.
00:57:58Thank you for weeding in me.
00:58:00But how do we get home?
00:58:02No problem.
00:58:03I have a telepathic link back home.
00:58:06Nice.
00:58:07Make it so.
00:58:08Weed us up more!
00:58:12Woo!
00:58:33How many do you think will make it back?
00:58:36Who fucking cares?
00:58:42Oh God!
00:58:45You look Wow!
00:58:53Thanks, Mom!
00:58:55Don't you, Mama Me, motherfucker!
00:58:58Uh-uh!
00:58:59No way, Baby!
00:59:12concentrate on the portal you pervert we gotta close it forever so nothing comes through it on
00:59:17either end okay on three one two just concentrate motherfucker
00:59:44oh and that's fucking that see what happens with teamwork and you use your powers for good
00:59:53yeah it's so much more rewarding than trying to take over the world isn't it
00:59:58shut the fuck up fuck you pig let's get down to business
01:00:04i'm taking back the shop you losers will be working for me and you know what that means
01:00:09got it actually i don't need the job i have plenty of money you are working for me dickhead
01:00:16got it so if this is another grand opening does that mean we're gonna have a grand opening party
01:00:25as long as your asses are selling my weed i don't give a fuck what y'all do just leave
01:00:29me alone
01:00:35there's no video for you
01:01:05My little lady.
01:01:18Serenity is the driver of healing.
01:01:22Freedom is the co-pilot of life.
01:01:45You're the best dad a weed boy could ever have.
01:01:50Oh, for fuck's sake.
01:02:13I'm gonna get those idiots if it's the last thing I ever do.
01:02:16Just keep the naked kids into a dull war.
01:02:21Do you know where this goes?
01:02:23That goes, right?
01:02:35We're gonna need way more glue.
01:02:38Wait till I get my revenge.
01:02:40It's gonna be so bad.
01:02:42And sexy.
01:02:43Should you get mad?
01:02:46Remake!
01:02:47Yeah.
01:02:50Yeah.
01:03:07Don't you dare be mad.
01:03:07Yeah.
01:03:08Oh, yeah.
01:03:09Oh, yeah.
01:03:10Oh, yeah.
01:03:11Oh, yeah.
01:03:14Oh, yeah.
01:03:15Oh, yeah.
01:03:16Oh, yeah.
01:03:17Oh, yeah.
01:03:17Oh, yeah.
01:05:17What the fuck?
Kommentare