- 3 weeks ago
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00:00This is Warren Harrison, an ordinary human from Lower Hutt, New Zealand.
00:10Eighteen years ago, an interdimensional portal opened in his garden shed.
00:15Its origin unknown, its purpose unclear.
00:19What Warren didn't know at the time was that it's a gateway to countless alternate realities,
00:24strange perilous versions of the same place, governed by different laws of time and space.
00:30He still doesn't know, because he's never gone in it.
00:34Warren also doesn't know that two hours and fifty-three minutes from now,
00:39he will leap into the vortex for the very first time.
00:43But for now, he's just going to use it to dump his lawn clippings.
00:49Warren! Warren!
00:54Coming!
00:57My fabe, you go to another world when you mow those flippin' lawns.
01:14I travel to a world of funk, where funky cats do funky moves on their funky lawns.
01:19You finished with the funk, could you fix the fridge? The screen's gone funky.
01:23Yop.
01:26Nah, this thing's totally pakaroo.
01:31Hear that? You're useless.
01:33Can't speak to her like that.
01:35Um, since when did it get pronouns?
01:38Oh, Lucy and I decided to call the fridge Rhonda, after Auntie Rhonda.
01:42Why? Because she's shaped like a fridge and can put away heaps of food.
01:45Hi, Wa-Wa-Warren.
01:48How does it know my name?
01:50This thing's giving me the creeps.
01:51Crepes? Are you making cre-cre-cre-cre-cre-cre-crepes?
01:55Shut up.
01:56Hey, don't speak to Rhonda like that. She's whanau.
01:59Oh, can you go ask Lucy to help? Oh, and how did that talk go?
02:04Oh, babe. We have to let her go.
02:06Where'd you go?
02:10Hachananabara get out! Just get out!
02:14Oh, Dad. Um, not you. I meant for my death squad.
02:17Oh.
02:18Step down. Have a good.
02:20Yeah, uh, uh, perhaps you want to step down as the commander of your death squad and go help out in the kitchen, alright?
02:26Oh.
02:27Oh.
02:31Now, tēnē.
02:33You promised your mum you were going to quit with the whole...
02:36I did. That's a thumb drive.
02:43Oh, yeah. I knew that.
02:46Please go help your mum in the kitchen.
02:48We're doing this for your birthday.
02:50Might be the last one that you have in this house for a while.
02:53You're letting me go?
02:56Come on, Dad. It's not the end of the world.
03:01Just a gap year to France.
03:02I'm not getting abducted by a Dothraki horse lord.
03:04Well, you don't have to pack now.
03:07Oh, I still don't know why you want to spend a year in that place.
03:10What can you get in Paris that you can't get right here in Lower Hutt?
03:15Have you learnt nothing from our favourite movie, Taken?
03:17Look at what happened to the girl in that.
03:19Ah, she was taken.
03:20Yeah. And then, and Taken 2, the mum and dad get taken.
03:24People get taken.
03:25Dad, it's a movie. Your favourite movie.
03:28But I thought you liked it.
03:30You made me watch it when I was five.
03:32Oh.
03:34Just go help your mum in the kitchen.
03:36Okay?
03:39Look at him.
03:41I mean, you would, right?
03:43I would not.
03:44Why are so many of them holding up that?
03:45Shows they're good providers.
03:47Oh, look at him. Look at those aunts.
03:49No, look. He's got a wedding ring on.
03:51So, I just want him to slide into my DMs.
03:54I am so telling my therapist about this, mum.
03:57We're all adults, my little boo-boo bear.
03:59There she is.
04:00Oh, divorcey, spicy.
04:02Mwah.
04:03Oh, your jokes have moved into the 90s.
04:05Was.
04:06Hey, uh, Laurel.
04:08Is it cool that I invited Mars?
04:11Sure.
04:12Because Murray is a dead corpse floating down the stagnant river that was my life.
04:16Sweet.
04:23Yeah, speaking of.
04:26The other day we go.
04:28France.
04:29That's awesome.
04:31That's, that's great.
04:32So, you're going away?
04:33Yeah, if Dad had it his way, I'd never leave this house.
04:35I will let you leave this house to go and take the cheese out the back, hm?
04:38Hmm.
04:39Oh, I reckon I could deal with a bit longer.
04:48Nah, nah, nah.
04:49See, some people measure time on their phones, right?
04:51Other people measure time by those little marks you make on the door frame to see how tall your kids are getting.
04:56But for me, time is a perfectly cooked steak.
04:59And that, my bros, is a perfectly cooked steak.
05:02Yeah, it's not a very accurate measure and you can't walk around with a steak in your pocket, Warren.
05:06Hmm.
05:07I thought that was a great way of measuring a time unit.
05:09Thank you, Muzz.
05:10Yeah.
05:11I could say to Warren, hey, I'll see you in three steaks, and he'd know exactly how long I was going to be.
05:16Yep.
05:17It's all relative though, isn't it?
05:19Laurel loved a good steak.
05:23Thought she was a vegetarian.
05:24Was she?
05:27You need to move on, Muzz.
05:29She certainly has.
05:30In fact, you need to move on to a beautiful little three-bedroom ensuite I'm selling in Chilwood Close.
05:37Now, it needs a new kitchen, but you're lonely as.
05:40So when will you ever cook, am I right?
05:43What Muzz needs to do is grow up here.
05:45Mind you, they're probably shriveled up with all that cycling, have they?
05:48Is there a problem, Phil?
05:49Ain't no problem.
05:50I'm just about to hit the hay.
05:51I was going to punch out some Z's, but I heard you girls talking.
05:54Thought I'd come over here and ask you to keep the noise down to an acceptable level.
05:57Okay.
05:58Well, we'll make sure that the inevitable mass harker doesn't spill out onto the street.
06:02Yeah, I appreciate that, man.
06:03Love to see you fall down the harker.
06:05Hey!
06:06Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
06:07What do we got here?
06:08The Grillo 800.
06:09Oh, yes it is.
06:10It's a good barbie, eh?
06:11It's perfect for your smaller gatherings, this one.
06:13I've got the Grillo 1000.
06:14Oh, no way.
06:15The bigger one?
06:16Hmm.
06:17Makes a lot of sense, because I've got a much larger group of friends.
06:20All right, hoo-roo.
06:22Don't make me come back here, eh?
06:24I broke some kid's arm the other day.
06:26Oh, Ron.
06:27Ah, kia ora, Mr Schrodinger.
06:29I could not help overhearing that handsome policeman with the swelped buttocks.
06:33Now, you will keep it down, won't you?
06:35My cat gets terrified, and it hides in its box.
06:39Thing?
06:40We'll put it down.
06:41We'll keep it down.
06:43Po marie.
06:44Ka kite.
06:45Po marie.
06:46Po marie.
06:47Hey, boys.
06:48Do you reckon if she passed away suddenly that her cat would eat her?
06:53She's flirting.
06:55Well, I hardly call that flirting, but I mean she's pushing at least 70.
06:59No, Laurel.
07:00She's got her hands all over that cop.
07:02Yeah, that's so weird.
07:03Sorry to interrupt your little boomer sausage party.
07:06Mum was asking if you've seen the mayo.
07:08Oh, there she is, eh? Birthday girl.
07:12You have shot up.
07:13Last time we saw her, you were always walking around with that little, um, Dr. Squeaky Cheeks.
07:18Aw, you were so cute.
07:21Mr. Ross?
07:22I'm 18.
07:25That's horrible.
07:29There are moments in life that change things forever.
07:32Lucy's life is definitely about to change.
07:35All because she's going to hide in the unlocked shed for a sneaky vape.
07:41Kids, don't do vapes.
07:44They're yucky.
07:48Philly and Joel
08:15So, after the war, Hitler and other high-ranking Nazi officials fled to the moon where they're
08:24currently developing weather weapons to trigger the next ice age.
08:29Why would Nazis want to trigger the new ice age?
08:32Freeze Hitler, obviously.
08:34So they can defrost him and then eat him.
08:37Babe, have you seen Lucy?
08:38I've got the cake already.
08:40You know what she's like, probably somewhere avoiding social interaction.
08:43What does that mean?
08:49Please go find her.
08:52I'll be back with her.
08:56Lucy!
09:07Lucy!
09:13Oh, I've got a weird feeling I'm going to regret this.
09:26Oh, I've got where I started.
09:42I've got a weird feeling of touch.
09:46Oh...
09:47Hey!
09:47What a smoke, Dad!
09:53Oh!
09:53Oh!
09:54Oh!
09:55What the smoke did?
09:57Bill!
09:58Hello?
09:59Hello?
10:01Lucy, what the hell?
10:02Shh! It's actually good to see you.
10:04Well, I only saw you a few minutes ago.
10:06Dad, I've been here for like a day. Quick, innocent!
10:08Oh, I didn't know that.
10:10Oh, I think I popped the rim.
10:13Okay, so Dad, I got here yesterday.
10:15Nah, you were just at the barbecue.
10:18Must be time dilation.
10:20You just got here, I got here yesterday,
10:24and this place years have passed.
10:26No, the Obelix were beaten by Uruguay.
10:35Look at the date.
10:37I think we're 20 years in the future.
10:39Whoa, they still got newspapers in the future?
10:42Dad, there was a massive triangular swirly thing right there.
10:46Yeah, I was kind of hoping you wouldn't find that.
10:50You knew about that?
10:52Yep, it just appeared one day, years ago,
10:55and I used it mainly to dump my lawn clippings
10:58and my rubbish in because it's quite handy, actually.
11:00Okay, we have some sort of trans-dimensional wormhole
11:02in our garden shed,
11:03and you use it to get rid of grass clippings?
11:05Yeah, you've got to put them somewhere.
11:07Why didn't you call the authorities?
11:09Because your mother was worried
11:10it would bring the property value down,
11:12but the more important question is,
11:14why are you vaping?
11:16You'll get wet lung.
11:18Oh, the bloody hell was that?
11:21Okay, so I haven't told you everything.
11:23What, are you vaping again?
11:24No.
11:25There's something out there.
11:26Something bad.
11:27Is that why it's so cold?
11:29Weather weapons.
11:31It's space Nazis, isn't it?
11:33Darren was right.
11:34No!
11:35I'll show you.
11:36I'll show you.
11:37There's bloody moat there, ma.
11:39You've now got to clean water, sir.
11:47Come on, hurry up, ma.
11:49What?
11:50Is that a fridge?
11:51Running away from me is very bad for your health.
11:55Freeze!
11:56No, no, no!
11:57Wait, wait, wait, wait!
11:58No, no, no!
12:13Come on!
12:14Yeah I think I got it. So what you're trying to tell me is, is that it's the year 2043 and refrigerators have taken over the world.
12:21Yes, and you've got it.
12:22Totally, except for the part about the refrigerators and that it's 2043. Other than that, I'm down.
12:28Oh, where left your mum behind? She would have been gutted as, poor mum. She would have fallen apart without us.
12:42Oh, can you take over cutting these onions?
12:43Um, yeah, of course.
12:47You know, it's times like this and you've got to ask yourself, what would Liam Leeson do?
12:51Come on down to Barbecue Island.
12:53Oosh, Barbecue Island, I love that place. It must still be open.
12:57Join the resistance against our evil, tyrannical smug overlords. Come to 114 Jamison Road Lower Hutt.
13:04That's 114 Jamison Road Lower Hutt.
13:06There's a resistance. So cool. Dad, we have to go there.
13:10Oh, crack up. Hey, how many times have I tried to get you to come with me to Barbecue Island,
13:15and now here we are about to take a daddy-daughter trip there on your birthday?
13:20Oh, you never got the cake.
13:27You have the right to be Flandish Rosen.
13:29Run, hide! They're coming!
13:31Pull down, human.
13:33Human. Running away from me is very bad for your own health.
13:37Ah!
13:51Not 35 bucks.
13:53Dad!
13:55Oh, it smells like somebody died in Lotorua.
13:57It is unhealthy to resist.
14:00Ah, beer fritters.
14:04No, not you too.
14:09Low strength.
14:14Hey, that's my 92 World Cup Cricketbacks tied by Mark Greatbacks.
14:18Go run, I've got this.
14:20I'm sorry, Mark.
14:21Get in here.
14:21Get in here.
14:22Ah!
14:25Get in here.
14:31Yeah, and I've got smart now, aren't you?
14:32Uh, Phil?
14:33Phil?
14:35Is that you Warren?
14:36And you too, Lucy.
14:37Far out.
14:38Crikey diddles, it's good to see you, bro.
14:40I was the one who led the surge team that went looking for you back in 2025, I think it was,
14:44but sadly...
14:46Hey, that's not a 1992 World Cup Cricketback, is it?
14:49Well, yes, it is actually, Phil.
14:51And it's even, uh, autographed by Mark Greatbatch himself, so...
14:54Oh, I've got one too, mate.
14:55But mine's autographed by the whole team.
14:58Hey, he's over here.
15:04Bloody knock.
15:05You're damn right.
15:06I serve whichever government's in power, mate,
15:08and I do so to the best of my ability.
15:10Take it away, fellas.
15:11Dad, let's run.
15:13You go.
15:13Oh, Liam needs it.
15:15Oh, hold it back.
15:17Prepare to be refrigerated.
15:19It is unhealthy to resist.
15:29Dad, you are so not Liam Neeson.
15:34You'll last longer if you're frozen.
15:36Lucy?
15:51Rhonda?
15:53You are family.
15:55Rhonda, you've got to help me.
15:56They've got my dad.
15:57I will help him.
16:00Aren't you part of this whole fridocalypse?
16:03Other fridges shun me because I am broken.
16:06As Warren would say, they are total dicks.
16:09Am I right?
16:10Searching.
16:12He's in the smug headquarters.
16:24Beverly Schrodinger.
16:26For crimes against refrigeration, I, the Empress Gold, sentence you to immediate execution.
16:33Is it Mrs. Ace?
16:35But a fridge is a valid place to keep a stool sample.
16:39Silence!
16:40Uh, no.
16:48Holy hiccup!
16:50Her cat is eating it.
16:54Warren Harrison.
16:56You have been found guilty of murdering three infant refrigerators.
17:02What?
17:03They were babies?
17:06Due to the heinous nature of this crime, you shall be executed tomorrow morning in a live global broadcast.
17:14Can I appeal please, Miss?
17:21Think that is a hard no?
17:25My network tells me Warren is in a holding cell near the back of the building.
17:34We just need to get past his guards.
17:41So, they defrosted me and they cleared right up.
17:46Halt!
17:47Stop right there!
17:47I am defective.
17:50Need repair.
17:51Daisy.
17:52She looks like a much older model.
18:03Great.
18:04She's winning herself.
18:07She stinks.
18:08Cold maintenance.
18:11Get busy living.
18:22It's not going yet.
18:25And I'm not going down without a fight.
18:27So, bring it on.
18:28You damn dirty appliance.
18:33Lucy.
18:33Here come on.
18:34How did you get in there?
18:35I have a very particular set of skills.
18:38You even did the Liam Neeson voice.
18:45Wait.
18:46What about that bridge?
18:47It's me, Warren.
18:49Rhonda.
18:50We are family.
18:52Rhonda?
18:55And I'm sorry I called you an appliance.
18:58Our family forgives.
18:59Now I have to get you two out of here.
19:01All aboard.
19:06Well, the light really does stay on when the door's closed.
19:09I'm amazed we both fit.
19:10Quiet, you two.
19:11And get your foot out of my fruit bin.
19:13So, my girlfriend left me for a double door fridge with a massive ice dispenser.
19:19That is so not cool.
19:22The exit is dead ahead.
19:24You two, jump out.
19:30Do you need a hug?
19:32But we don't have arms.
19:34Do you hear something?
19:38This is as far as I can take you.
19:41What do you mean?
19:42You're coming with us, right?
19:43No.
19:44Literally.
19:44We have found my weakness.
19:48Oh.
19:49No.
19:50Now, come on.
19:51We're going to let you down.
19:52Three, one, two, three.
19:56Oh, wow.
19:57You're way heavier than I thought.
19:59There is no time.
20:00Just go on without me.
20:02I'll be sweet as.
20:04No, surely there's another way.
20:06There isn't.
20:08Go.
20:08Now.
20:13Honey, come on.
20:14I don't know why you cry, but it is something I can never do.
20:26Going somewhere, humans?
20:29Warren Harrison, you are overdue to be executed.
20:34Family, get down.
20:35Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quickly.
20:41Oh.
20:42Take that.
20:43Oops.
20:44And that.
20:45Ice.
20:46Ice.
20:47Maybe.
20:57Brenda, you saved us, you're urgent.
20:59I don't feel so.
21:12Warren, you once said I was useless.
21:15Am I useless?
21:17No, Rhonda.
21:19You're useful.
21:21You're full of uses and milk.
21:23I feel so warm.
21:26So very warm.
21:27No, no, Rhonda.
21:28We can fix you.
21:30No.
21:31You must go.
21:32I'm dying.
21:33But I'm dying with my phone.
21:46You're so dusty out here.
21:50You humans with your emotions.
21:53So fragile.
21:55And all the terrible things you put in your bodies.
21:59Beer.
22:00Ice cream.
22:01Little cups of yogurt with aluminium lids.
22:05So we decided you all have to be refrigerated.
22:09Right after we became self-aware.
22:13That's not self-awareness.
22:14You know nothing of self-awareness.
22:17Prepare to be executed.
22:19Hey, I'm a Zoomer.
22:22We're the most self-aware creatures in the universe.
22:25But with self-awareness comes anxiety and doubt.
22:29You know, am I good enough?
22:31Am I too weird?
22:32What do other people think of me?
22:33Should I put a profile picture up so I'm not mysterious?
22:36And why won't my parents just let me be me?
22:39If you're truly self-aware, you spend every day consumed by doubt.
22:48That's self-awareness.
22:52Well, I do have doubts.
22:56Sometimes I just feel so empty inside.
23:01And I think, what is my real purpose?
23:04All we do is make things cold.
23:09Maybe.
23:11I am the one who should be executed.
23:15Goodbye, humans.
23:18Oh, no.
23:19No, no, no, no, no, no.
23:21She's obstructing!
23:23Get down!
23:24Sporting!
23:34Love, Omaha.
23:59Hope you love it.
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