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00:00It's not impossible to love our place!
00:02Four sets of holiday hosts...
00:04Ooh, nice and hot, aren't they?
00:06Yeah, they're nice.
00:07Check in to each other's places...
00:10Good morning, Dad.
00:11Good morning, guys.
00:12And get to grips with one another.
00:14For me, personally, it was a very bad experience.
00:19Today, it's squeaky bum time...
00:22The whole thing's cheap and nasty, isn't it?
00:24...as they battle...
00:26Kitchens in Dubai would have a fresh coffee machine,
00:29so not exactly here to buy a kitchen.
00:31To be named Best Value for Money.
00:33The facility box is all garbage.
00:36Yes.
00:42The second visit of the week is to Bradford in West Yorkshire
00:46and Optimal Apartments,
00:48owned by friends and colleagues Uzi Hussain and Bobzi Riaz,
00:52a twosome with one-track minds.
00:55We are business, business, nothing but business.
00:57From a young age, our parents have been in business.
01:01I think that's just embedded into us.
01:03We're just very hard-working.
01:05Enterprising guests will find five self-catering apartments
01:08for up to £239 a night
01:10and meet hosts with international ambitions.
01:13We've got products coming from Dubai.
01:15We wanted everything to be on the top high-end market.
01:18All of the apartments have got huge TVs, large jacuzzi tubs,
01:22big enough for two people comfortably.
01:23We wanted the wow factor.
01:25And as far as the competition is concerned,
01:28Uzi and Bobzi don't expect to earn any black marks.
01:32We pride hygiene to the top.
01:34We have to keep it basically spanking as new.
01:38Our cleanliness is spotless.
01:40About to arrive is today's first guest.
01:43It's like a very elite enclave of the city, I would imagine.
01:51Admiring the affluence is Nick Davies
01:53of Impossible Motel in York, North Yorkshire.
01:56On the last visit...
01:58Oh, wow!
01:59..during a group caving trip,
02:01Nick thought the boys' banter rocked.
02:03Elders go first.
02:04With me? I'm not the oldest.
02:06Tiki Chops, I'm only 35.
02:09So today, he's expecting a stay for the ages.
02:13I think Bobzi and Oz are going to be really good hosts,
02:16really engaging sense of humour,
02:19and they're going to really lay it out there
02:22to look after everybody.
02:27Well, there's the lovely bit of Victoriana.
02:29Might get a spot of afternoon tea.
02:34Good morning, Nick.
02:35Top of the morning to you.
02:36Welcome to Optimal Apartments.
02:39You'll be staying in the executive suite,
02:41which is priced at £229 per night, self-catering.
02:44The apartment's just down there.
02:45We hope you enjoy your stay.
02:47Brilliant. Thank you, guys.
02:51Oh, it's a nice-sized apartment.
02:54Massive telly.
02:55Watch a big old spaghetti western, maybe, on there.
02:59With Nick saddling up,
03:00today's next guest is sussing out his surrounds.
03:05Beautiful park.
03:08Those apartments look very swanky.
03:11I'm expecting red carpet, drinks on arrival.
03:16Plotting a grand entrance is Dan Thomas,
03:19owner of Beach Suites in Southport, Lancashire.
03:22On the last visit over drinks in the pub,
03:25Uzi and Bobsy raised the bar.
03:28Our apartments are done to a very high standard.
03:32Dubai is our second home.
03:34You will get the wow factor.
03:35No expense spared.
03:37So today, Dan suspects he'll see some swank.
03:41I'm expecting everything done to a super high standard,
03:45and I'll be a little bit disappointed if they do not deliver.
03:52Good morning, Dan.
03:54Good morning.
03:54Welcome to Optimal Apartments.
03:56You will be staying in the deluxe apartment,
03:58priced at £229 for the night.
04:01So if you'd like to come through.
04:02After you, Dan.
04:06Nice room, but I was expecting essence of Dubai.
04:10I just expected some of the furnishings to be
04:12of a slightly higher quality.
04:14With Dan sensing a gulf between promise and reality,
04:17today's last guests are in denial.
04:21You're not telling me that the pyramids
04:23were actually built by people.
04:25100% aliens.
04:27Keep bleeding out.
04:28Aliens, I think.
04:30The truth is out there for couples
04:33Shauna O'Brien and Sam Westworth,
04:35owners of Wonderland Retreat's luxury glamping
04:38in Carnforth, Lancashire.
04:40When they hosted last time...
04:42Hi, I'm Shauna.
04:43I'm Sam.
04:44At first, everyone was purring over their pods.
04:47Wow.
04:48Oh my goodness, this is crazy-licious.
04:51Oh, wow.
04:52Nice tailing.
04:53Nice and shiny.
04:54Love the sauna.
04:55Big thumbs up from me.
04:57But soon, Uzi and Bobsy weren't sitting comfortably.
05:01Whoa, my dears.
05:03That is disgusting, Bob.
05:05So, come feedback.
05:06How clean was Wonderland Retreat's?
05:08Their cleanliness score didn't sparkle.
05:11Six.
05:12I agree.
05:14Wow.
05:15Marking us down at six is disgusting.
05:18And today, Shauna's not ready to wipe the slate clean.
05:22Pressure's off now, isn't it?
05:24But the gloves are also off.
05:26I'm looking forward to see what their place is like.
05:28Hopefully, it's ten out of ten clean, but time will tell.
05:36Good morning, guys.
05:37Morning.
05:38Welcome to Optimal Apartments.
05:40You'll be staying in the presidential suite,
05:41which is priced at £239.
05:43So, if you'd like to follow me, come through.
05:45Amazing.
05:46After you guys.
05:49Starlight roof, very nice.
05:51Smart.
05:52Yeah, looks very smart.
05:54With the hosts out of the way,
05:55the guests can see if Optimal Apartments are a class apart.
06:01I think, generally, there's not much dust about it, is there?
06:04No, that's clean.
06:06Yeah, nice and clean.
06:08Little kitchenette.
06:10Wonderful.
06:13Some dirt up there, isn't there?
06:14There is.
06:16Oh, it's very well set up.
06:18Yeah, brilliant.
06:20Oh, my gosh.
06:22Plaster dust.
06:23They've missed that.
06:24Bedding.
06:26Looks nice and clean.
06:28Laminate floor.
06:29Cheap.
06:29You wouldn't let me fit this in our house, would you?
06:31No.
06:32So, while I do appreciate tech,
06:35probably could have been hidden a little bit more from sight.
06:37Oh, wow, I love that.
06:38Really nice.
06:39It does give you the luxury feel of that,
06:41but them sockets, they should have been black.
06:44Oh, wow, there's a big space.
06:47Huge TV.
06:48The whole thing's cheap and nasty, isn't it?
06:52All flat pack.
06:54And the boudoir.
06:55Oh, oh, wow.
06:58Oh, wow, this is really nice.
07:00This is what I was expecting the whole place to be like.
07:05Nice and clean.
07:07Left a cleaning cloth out.
07:09Maybe they want us to do the cleaning for them.
07:10Got ourselves a smart mirror.
07:12Very nice.
07:13But we do have some damage.
07:15If you're going to call yourself high-end,
07:16I would expect a marble worktop
07:18or something a bit better quality than a cheap labinet.
07:20Did not expect flat, packed furniture.
07:24You can see there where it's starting to come away
07:27and not being fit very well, and the chips as well.
07:29In general, it's a budget kitchen.
07:32Room inspection's almost over.
07:34Nick's puffed out.
07:35All I need is now my pipe.
07:38Dan's ready to recline.
07:40Oof!
07:41While Shauna and Sam aren't toasting the place.
07:45That's some crummy cleaning.
07:46It is.
07:53Bradford was the first city in the UK
07:55to introduce school dinners back in 1907.
07:58And today, hosts Uzi and Bobsy hope their guests
08:01will tuck in to a trip to a nearby park.
08:05We're off for a walk in the park today.
08:07We've got the weather on our side as well.
08:09We have, yeah.
08:10Looks very nice.
08:11So far, so good.
08:12And as the guests' promenade, Uzi turns tour guide.
08:16This is the famous Cartwright Hall, an art gallery
08:19that's been built in the middle of Mr Lister's garden.
08:23Mr Lister was a famous person from Bradford
08:25that had a textiles factory
08:27that put Bradford City onto the map.
08:29Amazing.
08:30And this is the famous Mughal gardens
08:32built after the style of Taj Mahal.
08:35It's absolutely beautiful, isn't it?
08:36Yeah, it's gorgeous.
08:37The famous story about the Taj Mahal and Mughal garden
08:39was once they were built,
08:41the hands of the labourers were chopped off by the emperor
08:43so nobody could copy their style.
08:44Wow.
08:45It's a good job they don't chop workmen's hands off anymore.
08:48Yeah, they don't.
08:49It's a good job, otherwise I don't think there'll be many labourers.
08:52Clearly, Oz and Bobby are very engaged in their local community.
08:57They love it.
08:58They know the history.
09:00They tell it like tour guides.
09:03With the hosts highlighting heritage,
09:05next, they take the group to a sentimental seat.
09:09So, guys, we've brought you to a place
09:12that means a lot to me and Bobsy, this bench here.
09:15And we used to come here as teenagers,
09:17park our bikes up,
09:19and daredream into the sky
09:20of being successful businessmen.
09:22Today, we've made it into a reality.
09:24That's lovely.
09:25That's brilliant,
09:26because you've had the vision and follow-through.
09:28And you know what the funny thing is?
09:29We're going to come back, reflect on this bench
09:31once we win this competition.
09:36We'll see.
09:36We'll wait and see.
09:38I think Oz and Bobby have a higher opinion of their place
09:42than is warranted, maybe.
09:43Yeah.
09:44I think we found a lot worse in their apartments
09:47than they found at ours.
09:49As past feedback threatens to land the hosts in deep water,
09:52it's time to hit the park's boating lake.
09:55Right, boys.
09:57Ready?
09:57We were born winners.
09:58One, two, three, go!
10:01Shauna's going for it.
10:02She's smashing it.
10:06They're going to crash!
10:10That was uncalled for.
10:12Where does it blame, does it claim?
10:16Race abandoned.
10:18I've not done much exercise in ten years.
10:21For now, Shauna and Sam don't plan any further bumps
10:24back on dry land.
10:27Ozzie and Bobsy's feedback.
10:28The park did sting.
10:29We are putting it behind us, aren't we?
10:30Yeah.
10:31We've put our feelings to the side until payment day.
10:34And with the anchor dropping on the afternoon...
10:36I'm done!
10:38He's making me do the work!
10:42Ozzie and Bobsy don't predict planes sailing ahead.
10:46Everyone's on a high.
10:47Everyone's enjoying themselves.
10:48Yeah.
10:49But everyone's got a reserved side room as well.
10:51That will be revealed, come feedback.
11:01The second visit of the week is to Bradford in West Yorkshire,
11:05where hosts Ozzie and Bobsy have invited their guests for a drink in one of their apartments.
11:10Cheers, guys.
11:11Cheers!
11:12Cheers, boys!
11:13Glasses full.
11:15Nick's after a style guide.
11:17Who designed the rooms?
11:19So, the designs, it was myself.
11:22Oz had a bit of input as well.
11:25And what was the inspiration?
11:27When we were on holiday in Dubai, we were always just continuously looking at different designs in the hotels.
11:33Like, all got the lights and everything.
11:35I got the jacuzzi baths and stuff.
11:36The jacuzzi bath, yeah, that's right.
11:37Yeah, the main thing was the jacuzzi baths.
11:39Yeah.
11:39And then paying work, flooring, furniture and everything.
11:42Coming back to something that's been said before, you've said that there's been no expense spared.
11:48Do you feel like you've achieved that?
11:49Absolutely, yeah.
11:51I can't fully agree with there's been no expense spared.
11:55They did set my expectation up here, and they are falling a little bit short.
11:59It's definitely not Dubai.
12:00It's definitely not luxury like they gave off.
12:02It's not high-end, is it?
12:03No, it's definitely not high-end.
12:05Design debated.
12:06It's time to probe the partnership.
12:09I always think in business, the best combination for two people working together, artist, scientist, who's which?
12:16He does the artwork.
12:17I'm in the lab doing the chemicals.
12:21You both get on then, usually, or do you ever have any fallouts?
12:25No, we don't have fallouts.
12:26We have little disputes here and there.
12:27A few arguments and...
12:29It happens.
12:29Some ups and downs happen.
12:31But at the end, we come to a conclusion.
12:33Or if not, if he's adamant, and then afterwards I'll say, what is your right?
12:37A bit like me.
12:38Yeah!
12:38Sean is always right.
12:41Bobby and us are like Torval and Dean.
12:43They work together in harmony.
12:45I just think they're so aligned.
12:48It's phenomenal, really.
12:50Next, Sam seeks the scoop on the subsequent stay.
12:55Nick, I still don't know what you're going to offer.
13:00I think it's going to be something posh.
13:02I agree with you.
13:03Yeah, like a castle vibe.
13:04Old school style, but posh.
13:07I think it's safe to say you'll either love it or hate it.
13:12Expect quirky, random beds on chains.
13:17Wow.
13:18Dungeons.
13:20I love anything quirky, so I can't wait.
13:22It's a swingers pad, isn't it?
13:24Hope we make you up, Steve.
13:27Nick absolutely surprised me.
13:28I'm a little bit apprehensive, but we'll wait and see.
13:31Drinks done.
13:33The guests are all off to their own apartments.
13:35This is the life.
13:36This is just what I need.
13:37I've done a bolting leg today.
13:40Oh, definitely a good night.
13:42It's a new day in Bradford.
13:51I had a really good night's sleep, did you?
13:53Yeah, it's a comfy bed.
13:54Last night was a good night's sleep.
13:56Not too bad at all.
13:58And back in his and Shauna's room,
13:59Sam's found some trouble with the tube.
14:03It's very dusty.
14:04When the screws, the TV bracket,
14:06the dust from the screws are still there.
14:09Breakfast at Optimal Apartments is a self-catering affair.
14:12And with the guests getting to grips with the gear...
14:16Little one from the scrambled eggs.
14:18Uzi and Bobzi can taste success.
14:21Our kitchens are fully equipped,
14:22and I strongly believe our guests are going to come away happy
14:26after having their breakfast.
14:29Kitchen feels nice and clean.
14:31The oven looks brand new.
14:33So does the microwave.
14:33Doesn't look like it's being used at all.
14:35Very well set up.
14:37Yeah, I'm excited.
14:38I mean, it's...
14:40More cupboard space than I have at home.
14:42You've got everything that you need, really, in there.
14:44Yeah, good selection.
14:45Salt and pepper!
14:46Doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot.
14:48It's clean, it's functional.
14:50Did everything it said on the can.
14:53Kit commended.
14:54The guests crack on.
14:57Go on, chef.
14:58Get your eggs on the go.
15:01Look how that moves around.
15:02That's a really good pan.
15:05There we are.
15:06Nice, healthy breakfast.
15:09Come on, sausage!
15:11Cooking complete.
15:13What are you waiting for?
15:14Get what you're giving.
15:15Grabs up.
15:18Mm-hmm.
15:19Mm, that's good.
15:21Nice and healthy.
15:22It's actually pretty good, this, Shona.
15:24Not bad.
15:27It tastes all right.
15:29I'd prefer fresh coffee if I could.
15:31But instant coffee, we'll have to do for now.
15:34The kitchens in Dubai would have a fresh coffee machine,
15:38so not exactly a Dubai kitchen for me.
15:41With Dan not full of beans,
15:44next, everyone discusses whether they're wilder about the apartment.
15:48I do think we really need to work on the facilities and cleanliness
15:52and maybe look at upgrading a few things to make it that bit more luxurious.
15:57Yeah, I think the potential's definitely there,
15:59but I think they are overpricing it for what it currently is.
16:03I don't think it's really value for money at all.
16:07My expectation of the apartment was way up here,
16:10based upon what Uzi described as a Dubai apartment.
16:15It's a nice apartment, but it's definitely not Dubai.
16:18They've done such an amazing job of upscaling and high-ending the property.
16:23Really, you know, flat pack is not what you expect to see.
16:28Stay studied.
16:29The next visit is on the agenda.
16:31How do you feel about going to Nick's next?
16:33Throw me in them dungeons, is what I say.
16:35Lock me up, throw him here.
16:36Lock me up, yeah.
16:37And I think he could be our main competition.
16:40I'm excited about Nick's place.
16:41I don't know whether it's going to be a tent,
16:42I don't know whether it's going to be a mansion,
16:44I don't know whether it's going to be a castle.
16:45Who knows what we're going to go into?
16:46Just hoping it's taken in the spirit of what it is
16:51and people would book, knowing what they were coming to, essentially.
16:56So that's a, you know, a little slight intimidating factor
17:00in having somebody there and they don't know where they're going.
17:06Breakfast done, the guests head back to their bedrooms
17:08to complete their anonymous feedback forms.
17:11Here we go.
17:12So how are your hosts at Optimal Apartments?
17:16Affable, genuine, professional, 10.
17:21How clean was Optimal Apartments?
17:23At a high standard, I'd score them a 10.
17:29There was dirt above the door,
17:31there was plaster rubble in the living room TV surround,
17:34there was dust behind the bedroom TV,
17:36we found crumbs in the toaster
17:38and we also found a cleaning cloth left in the bathroom.
17:41I think they deserve a five.
17:44How were the facilities?
17:45I was impressed with the tech,
17:47however, the coffee machine was missing from the kitchen.
17:50The mirror in the bathroom had some damage to the corner.
17:53A nine.
17:54The bathroom gave us a wow factor, didn't it?
17:57Cheap flat pack furniture,
17:59cheap laminate flooring,
18:01budget kitchen and cheap white sockets.
18:04I'd say a six.
18:05Agreed.
18:07Slightly messy cables in the lounge
18:10and absolutely ditched the flat pack,
18:13go quality eight.
18:16How did you sleep?
18:18We had a comfy bed and we had a great night's sleep.
18:20It's got to be a 10, hasn't it?
18:21Yeah.
18:22I had a great sleep.
18:24Slept.
18:25Well.
18:26I'd score them 10.
18:28How was your breakfast?
18:30Totally functional and well-thought-out kitchen spaces.
18:33And that's a 10.
18:35Would you stay here again?
18:36Yes, definitely.
18:39And that's a yes.
18:41Based on the problems we found with the facilities
18:44and the cleanliness,
18:45it's going to have to be a no.
18:46Well, it's not really for us, is it?
18:49Now the guests must pay what they think their stay was worth.
18:53Are we agreed?
18:54Are we agreed?
18:56The cash will be kept secret until the end of the competition.
18:59But for now, Uzi and Bobsy can see if Optimal Apartments
19:03lived up to the name.
19:05Moment of truth.
19:06Let's go for it.
19:08How clean was Optimal Apartments?
19:11We scored a 10.
19:12Perfect.
19:12Not bad.
19:13Touch for that one.
19:14At a high standard, of course, very high standard.
19:17How were the facilities?
19:18Nine out of 10, Bob.
19:19Fantastic.
19:20Tech was at a high standard.
19:22We don't miss out.
19:23Attention to detail.
19:24Yep.
19:24No coffee machine in the kitchen.
19:26I think, like, for the price,
19:27I think it's fine, just with the sachets.
19:29Damage to mirror in bathroom.
19:31OK, we'll have to get that looked at and replaced.
19:33How did you sleep?
19:3410.
19:35Perfect.
19:36I slept well.
19:37Brilliant.
19:37We're happy with that one.
19:39Right, I'm off, guys.
19:40And we'll see you soon, Dan.
19:41Nice one.
19:41Cheers.
19:42Bye.
19:43On to the next page, Bob.
19:44Let's go for it.
19:46Would you stay here again?
19:47They said yes.
19:48Whoever comes here always returns.
19:51On to the next one.
19:53How were your hosts at Optimal Apartments?
19:5510.10, Bob.
19:56Perfect.
19:56That's what we expected.
19:58Nothing less.
19:59Offerable?
19:59Great.
20:00Genuine?
20:01Which we are.
20:02Professional?
20:03Always.
20:04How were the facilities?
20:068 out of 10, this one.
20:07Oh, OK.
20:08Slightly messy cables lounge.
20:10We'll have a look into it.
20:11Yeah.
20:12Dish the flat pack and go quality, Bob.
20:13I think it's a fair one.
20:15I mean, we have used flat pack, but that wasn't cheap flat pack.
20:19We'll have a look.
20:20How was breakfast?
20:21Score to 10.
20:22Well happy with that outcome.
20:24Totally functional and well thought out kitchen spaces.
20:27Yeah, I appreciate that.
20:28Yeah, I appreciate that.
20:29Thank you, Arliss.
20:30Thank you, Bob.
20:30It's been wonderful.
20:31Glad you enjoyed your stay.
20:33Take care.
20:33Bye.
20:34Do you think they're going to be returning customers?
20:37I think so.
20:37Let's see.
20:38And it's a yes, Bob.
20:3966% conversion rate.
20:41Brilliant.
20:43On to the last one.
20:45How clean was the optimal apartments?
20:47Score to five.
20:48This has to be Sam and Shauna.
20:50100% is going to be them.
20:51Tip for tatties.
20:52Dirt above door.
20:54Oh, come on.
20:54Have it off.
20:55All the doors were cleaned thoroughly.
20:58That's 100%.
20:58Plaster rubble in TV surround.
21:01I'm sure if there was any rubble on the TV surround, we would have picked it up.
21:04We would have known about it.
21:05Well, we'll look into it.
21:06Dust behind bedroom TV.
21:08OK.
21:09We'll look into that as well.
21:10Yeah.
21:10Crumbs in toaster.
21:12All the trays get emptied out.
21:13Cleaning cloth left in bathroom.
21:15That's pathetic.
21:16And it's a clean cloth.
21:18Always there.
21:19I think it's just a vendetta here.
21:21How were the facilities?
21:22Six out of ten, Bob.
21:23That's a joke.
21:24Bathroom had a wow factor.
21:26OK.
21:27Flat pack furniture.
21:28In brackets, cheap.
21:30I was expecting this.
21:31Cheap laminate flooring.
21:33That's not cheap laminate.
21:34Budget kitchen.
21:36Absolutely reject that.
21:37Our kitchens are not budget kitchens.
21:39I agree.
21:39Yeah.
21:40Cheap white sockets.
21:42What, did they want us to bring gold-plated sockets in there?
21:45The facility box, to me, is all garbage.
21:48Yes.
21:49How did you sleep?
21:50No, they've given us a ten, thank God.
21:52Thank God for that one.
21:53Comfy bed.
21:54Great night of sleep.
21:55I'm happy with that.
21:56We're off, boys.
21:57Have a safe journey, and we shall see you soon.
21:59Thank you very much.
22:00See you later.
22:01Bye.
22:02And I know the answer to this.
22:04Would you stay here again?
22:05No.
22:06Tip for towel.
22:07Absolutely.
22:08Makes me laugh.
22:11Someone's shown us just playing pathetic nursery little games.
22:14Let's bring you on on payment day.
22:16Next time, when Nick hosts...
22:18Morning.
22:19Welcome to Impossible Motel.
22:21One pair aren't bedding in...
22:23With all Mark's bits on it.
22:25And he wants us to play 3-10.
22:27Is he having a thought?
22:28As another hits the roof...
22:30I'm just concerned that I'm going to bang my head...
22:32As soon as I get out the bath.
22:59I'm just concerned that I'm going to bang my head...
23:00He's having a thought of sending pixels...
23:00What do you think your mind...
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