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00:00Thank you for lettin' us be ourselves
00:02So don't mind me if I repeat myself
00:04These simple lines be good for your health
00:06Keep them trying rhymes on the shelf
00:08Live love life like you just don't care
00:10Five thousand leaders never scared
00:12Rain and noise is the moment they fear
00:16Get up, sit up here for my dear
00:18Get up, throw your hands in the head
00:20Get up, it's showin' you
00:22Get up, it's showin' you
00:24Get up, it's showin' you
00:26Get up, it's showin' you
00:28Get up, it's showin' you
00:30Finish wrapping the presents, sit back on the couch
00:36Then realise you forgot to buy batteries
00:38It's Christmas Eve and it's time for the last leg
00:42Tonight on the show
00:44We look at a prediction of Christmas future
00:46Look back on Christmas past
00:48And take a sneaky look at our Christmas present
00:52Plus we'll be joined by presenter Alison Hammond
00:54Comedian Harry Hill and music legend Rick Astley
00:56On the show that's always a Christmas diehard
01:08G'day, I'm Adam Hills
01:10Welcome to The Last Leg, the show that wonders
01:12If King Charles' speech is going to get one less viewer this year
01:14With fears always of the pride of Huddersfield, Alex Brooker
01:16And the man who turned on the Christmas lights in Exeter this year
01:20But only in his own house, Josh Whittacombe
01:22Happy Christmas Eve everybody
01:24Every year we dress up there's something ridiculous for Christmas
01:26I, of course, am Tom Hanks
01:28From the Polar Express
01:30There you go
01:32Yeah, it's not bad
01:42Yeah, you're such a fan of the film that you've called the character Tom Hanks
01:46You look like you're about to strip
01:48That is a different type of Polar Express
01:52I went with Polar Express because it's my favourite Tom Hanks film
01:54Actually, it's my second favourite but Philadelphia didn't feel appropriate
01:58Merry Christmas!
02:00Josh, would you like to explain who you're dressed as?
02:02Oh, I didn't get the memo, I didn't know it was fancy dress
02:04No, I've come as
02:06I'll stand up for this
02:08I've come as Francis Rossi from the Band Aid video
02:12Amazing!
02:26I'm not saying I've run out of ideas
02:28I look like Michael Portillo
02:32You look like someone who's been caught at Heathrow trying to smuggle in illegal reptiles
02:38I've been caught at Heathrow trying to smuggle in illegal reptiles.
02:45Well, I've certainly got a snake in these tight trousers.
02:50Alex, do you want to explain what's going on there?
02:52Yeah, I'm Tim Allen in the Santa Claus.
02:55Santa's just fallen off my roof and I've just put the jacket on.
02:58So, yeah, and also, I'll tell you what, it's comfy.
03:01I'll tell you what, your snake will be all right in these pyjama bottoms, mate, honestly.
03:04This is the comfiest I've ever been.
03:06I'm not going to say you've not gone too much effort,
03:08but compared to the two of us...
03:09Wearing, literally, slippers, pyjamas and just you've put on a Santa...
03:14Yeah, I know.
03:15I think these are comfy slippers.
03:17I can only feel the one, but I think...
03:20All right, the big story, of course, is Christmas!
03:25And it's the story Alex has been most excited about all year.
03:28So, let's start with this.
03:29Is it OK that Alex interrupted a last leg meeting this year
03:33to have his Christmas tree delivered?
03:36OK.
03:37Is it OK he did that in October?
03:42Well, here's another, is it OK for you?
03:44Is it OK that it's a 13-foot tree?
03:47That is...
03:48I know, that's 12 more feet than Alex has.
03:54Let's see, here's a photo of it arriving.
03:56Just so, you know, Alex took the tree out, and then once that was done,
04:00Alex's wife put all her belongings in there and there.
04:06Here's the photo of the tree once it was up and running.
04:09It's so...
04:10Fucking hell!
04:11It looks like...
04:12You know those North Korean marches where they have the missiles?
04:17Honestly, it's so big that's an actual star on top of it.
04:22Is it a real tree?
04:23It's not a real tree.
04:24Oh, no, no, no, no.
04:25No, so even your Christmas tree is prosthetic.
04:27LAUGHTER
04:33Look, knowing how much you love Christmas, I would imagine the ads you get on your phone are different to the ads I get on my phone.
04:41Oh mate, I mean, the algorithm on Instagram, I start getting loads of these like Christmas, like Larry Christmas suits and outfits.
04:49Right.
04:50Maybe because I was talking about Christmas jumpers.
04:51That's all my algorithm, it's just Christmas suits and stuff like that.
04:54Yeah, we've got some of the garish images Alex has been getting, check these out.
04:58The thing with it is, you two complain a lot, you know, about your disabilities, but that guy in the suit, he hasn't got a head.
05:08It looks like...
05:09I'd say that's far away.
05:11At the Paralympics, you're in the toughest category.
05:15Yeah, especially if it's a dead heat in the sprinting.
05:22The suit, I love the suit, it looks like the kind of suit Santa would wear to court.
05:27You know what I mean?
05:28Like if Santa turned up in the Epstein files.
05:31No, Santa's not, obviously Santa's not in the Epstein files.
05:34Obviously, because we all know Santa makes the list and checks it twice.
05:40I reckon, pausing for an edit...
05:42I think nothing says Christmas Eve more than Philadelphia and the Epstein files.
05:56I reckon if you can encapsulate Alex's algorithm into one image, it would be this.
06:03Declan Rice, dressed as Santa, drinking a Frosé with Big John.
06:06That is...
06:08That's Alex's...
06:09I'm assuming that's your default setting when you blank out during an Easter.
06:13Is it true you want a dash cam for Christmas?
06:15Yeah, I do.
06:16Yeah, I genuinely do.
06:17I've got banged...
06:18So, I've got banged into dash cam footage.
06:21That's the other thing my algorithm is jumping up.
06:22What do you mean?
06:23So, like, I've got really into, like, watching these videos of, like, just people having near misses.
06:28But the one I've been getting into most is a geezer called Big Jobber, who basically...
06:33Wait, what?
06:34What?
06:35His name's Big Jobber and basically what he does is...
06:36I'm going to say it, Hilsie.
06:37When Brooker searched Big Jobber, he wasn't looking for a dash cam footage.
06:40He assesses, like, the insurance library who's at fault for the crash based on the dash cam footage.
06:50Are you okay?
06:51I think I'm having, like, the most boring midlife crisis of all time.
06:57But I really want a dash cam.
06:59We've got a very special treat for Alex tonight.
07:01So, we've been following Santa on his radar tonight.
07:03Oh, okay.
07:04So, we're going to check in to see where he is right now.
07:06Have a look at this on the map.
07:07He...
07:08Now, that seems to be Huddersfield, which is where you live, Alex.
07:12Yeah.
07:13He seems to be stuck there.
07:14Let's go to Santa's dash cam, or as he calls it, dash-a-cam, to see what's happening.
07:24Gosh!
07:25What arsehole put up a 12-foot tree?
07:28Look, don't breathalise me.
07:30I've had 83 million cherries.
07:32Here's your froze machine, you prick.
07:37Now, one AI generator reimagined Santa over the decades, showing how, and this is a quote,
07:46beloved figures can evolve alongside society's progress.
07:50Here is its revealing timeline of Santas.
07:52Let's go through them one by one.
07:54Here's 1960s Santa.
07:55Textbook.
07:56Classic.
07:57Classic Santa.
07:58Coca-Cola Santa.
07:59No issue with that, yeah.
08:00Yep.
08:011970s Santa.
08:02Ooh.
08:03I've...
08:04I'm not letting my kids sit on his knee.
08:07Let's look at 1980s Santa.
08:10Wow.
08:11He's been lifting his sack at eight...
08:13It's no wonder Mummy was kissing Santa Claus, looking at that guy.
08:18I mean, that'll leave her Saint Nicholas.
08:21Oh, dear.
08:22Oh, dear.
08:23Oh, dear.
08:24That from me, do you know what, I'm not...
08:39It's ruined Christmas.
08:40And that's a guy who was fine with the Epstein joke.
08:44Uh, 2010s Santa?
08:48Couldn't give a shit, could I?
08:49No.
08:502030s?
08:51Well, I tell you what, JK Rowling's not going to be happy from 2030s.
08:56Oh, dear.
09:01Look, there's one in the audience!
09:05How did that happen?
09:08Mate!
09:09It's the one fucking night you work!
09:16I'm not so sure about 2050s Santa.
09:21I mean, no.
09:22I mean, he looks like he's going to shoot the naughty boys again.
09:25And look, as Santa faces an AI future, so does the art of gift-giving,
09:29because surveys have found that a lot of people are using generative AI
09:32for present ideas.
09:33I love the idea that tomorrow there's going to be men everywhere
09:37blaming AI for misjudged gives for their other halves.
09:40It's just going, yeah, I mean,
09:43Jack GPT just said anal beads, I don't even know why.
09:46Like, the technology's just not, it's just not right.
09:50By the way, love, do us a favour,
09:51can you quickly ring your mum and tell her not to open her?
09:58So we've decided to use AI tonight to choose our presents for each other.
10:02And to deliver them, would you please welcome,
10:04all the way from the future, Robot Santa!
10:07Santa baby,
10:09Yes, little savi and a virtue.
10:12Oh, man.
10:14Been an awful good day, Santa baby.
10:20I mean, the technology in the future is amazing, isn't it?
10:25I tell you what, the robot's improved more than the trolley, hasn't it?
10:29It's not often I get to say this about other people,
10:34but you do walk a bit funny, don't you?
10:36Can the robot do the Vs towards Alex?
10:44All right, so we started by asking AI the question,
10:50what is a good Christmas present for Alex Brooker?
10:52Now, once we explained who Alex Brooker was...
10:54It suggested a personalised Arsenal jersey.
11:01Yes, please.
11:02So, could you please bring the presents over?
11:04Do you know what?
11:09Yeah.
11:10RADA is fucking good, isn't it?
11:12RADA!
11:14RADA!
11:15RADA!
11:16RADA!
11:17RADA!
11:18RADA!
11:19RADA!
11:20RADA!
11:21RADA!
11:22RADA!
11:23RADA!
11:24RADA!
11:25Thank you very much.
11:26I think that's your answer.
11:27It's good to have Daniel Day-Lewis back in the game, isn't it?
11:30RADA!
11:31Oh, wow.
11:32Unbelievable.
11:33No, back a bit, there we go.
11:35Oh, there we go.
11:37Thank you, Robot Santa.
11:39They said...
11:41Do you know what?
11:42When they said Greg Wallace would never be back on TV...
11:44RADA!
11:45RADA!
11:46RADA!
11:47RADA!
11:48RADA!
11:49RADA!
11:50RADA!
11:51RADA!
11:52RADA!
11:53RADA!
11:54RADA!
11:55RADA!
11:56RADA!
11:57So, I started out by asking AI what to get for Alex.
11:59Yes.
12:00And it said, a personalised Arsenal jersey.
12:02Am I allowed to open it?
12:03You are allowed to open it.
12:04Oh, wow.
12:05So, we've got you an Arsenal jersey,
12:07and on the back we've got the picture of you with Declan Rice
12:11and Big John drinking the Frosé.
12:13Oh, yes, please.
12:14Merry Christmas.
12:15RADA!
12:16RADA!
12:17I love this robot.
12:19He did a little happy dance when it was good.
12:22So, when I asked...
12:24RADA!
12:25How is the robot funnier than all of us?
12:28RADA!
12:29This is the future, Josh.
12:31RADA!
12:32So, when I asked AI what to get Josh, it said,
12:36something that balances his sober lifestyle, his love of home,
12:40his writing work and his comedic vibe.
12:42Oh, that's genuinely nice.
12:44It said, a premium tea gift set and notebook combo
12:48with a personal note.
12:50So, an AI wrote the note.
12:53This is the personal note.
12:54Oh!
12:55For when you fancy putting the kettle on...
12:56I genuinely like this.
12:57For when you fancy putting the kettle on
12:59and jamming down those five-minute observations.
13:02This is the great thing.
13:04It also added,
13:05Josh is an observational comedian
13:07who focuses on the minutiae of everyday life
13:10rather than big topical issues.
13:13I think anyone who's seen me trying to walk around the news
13:18on this show would agree with that.
13:20And so, what did AI suggest for me?
13:23Well, AI, they got...
13:25So, basically, they said,
13:26something that was tied to your interest in disability awareness
13:29and sport, but more importantly,
13:31a high-quality item that acknowledges that part of his life,
13:34but not in a pitying way.
13:36They wanted us to give you something empowering.
13:38Not in a pitying way?
13:40No, so we didn't want to get you any sort of present
13:42that would kind of sound pitying at all.
13:45OK.
13:46So, we've got you a book.
13:48You have got me a book.
13:49Which is called,
13:50The Little Disabled Engine That Could.
13:57Thank you so much, boys.
13:58I can add that to my collection,
13:59along with C-Spot Limp.
14:01Oh, the places you'll park.
14:04And can we also have a big thank you to Robot Santa!
14:09Now, Christmas telly is also changing.
14:17There's a reality series on Hallmark this year
14:19called Finding Mr Christmas.
14:21The TV show focuses on ten aspiring actors
14:24who compete for the chance to be the next leading man
14:27in a Hallmark Christmas film.
14:29Here is the cheesy trailer for the wholesome reality series.
14:33Boy, do I have an early holiday gift for you.
14:36We are back for season two with an all-new group of hunks
14:39and festive face-offs.
14:41Check out this sneak peek.
14:42It's a huge house.
14:43I'm down to stay here for a while.
14:45What's up, guys?
14:46What's up, fellas?
14:47What's up, Angel?
14:48Dude, it's so epic.
14:50Dude, we've got the trust circle going on already.
14:52I don't trust that trust circle.
14:57Have you seen Finding Mr Easter?
15:00It's a bit bleaker because the winner gets nailed to a cross.
15:11Now...
15:14Throughout the show...
15:17Sorry, it's so too edgy for you.
15:20Honestly, you're just everything you say with that ponytail.
15:25Now, throughout the show, this Finding Mr Christmas,
15:28I'm like, why did you just get a cut away of my fucking ponytail?
15:32We've never used that camera angle in 15 years!
15:36That's not one of our angles!
15:39Where's that?
15:40I don't even know where that camera is!
15:44Throughout Finding Mr Christmas,
15:45the actors have to complete a series of challenges,
15:47including gift wrapping, untangling Christmas lights
15:49and acting in a scene.
15:51But we think they missed a trick
15:53because we've got our own Mr Christmas here, Alex Brooker.
15:56I don't know why they didn't cast him, right?
15:58100%, mate.
16:00So, throughout the show tonight,
16:01we're going to set Alex a series of Christmassy tasks
16:03and he's going to do the first one now.
16:05We need you to head over there, please, Alex.
16:07I didn't know why.
16:08Are you ready? Are you ready?
16:14It's based on this festive challenge.
16:16Remember, guys, presentation is important,
16:20but your personality and star quality
16:23are always on Santa's radar.
16:26Ooh!
16:27So give us your best runway walks and slay!
16:30Yeah!
16:31Wait, you're up first.
16:35Ooh!
16:36Ooh!
16:37Ooh!
16:38Ooh!
16:39Okay, hello!
16:40Melissa, I don't want you to get too close to this fire.
16:42Sugar melts.
16:44Oh!
16:47Wow!
16:52So, it's time for Alex to take on
16:54the Mr Christmas Catwalk Challenge.
16:57Alex, I want some strut with a Good Will To All Men vibe.
17:01Yeah!
17:02Yeah!
17:03Yeah!
17:04Yeah!
17:05Yeah!
17:06Uh, genuinely, by the way,
17:07don't get too close to me,
17:09cos I think this is flammable as far.
17:10Ha, ha, ha, ha!
17:13Ha, ha, ha, ha!
17:18Uh, genuinely, by the way,
17:20don't get too close to me because I think this is flammable as far.
17:24Ha, ha, ha, ha!
17:26Alex, you're through to the next round!
17:28All right, let's welcome tonight's guests, they're Bake Off royalty, which means much
17:38like real royalty, they're both in bread.
17:40Please welcome Alison Hammond and comedian Harry Hill.
17:44I don't believe it, Frances Rotti and Tim Allen and Bernard Cribbins from the Railway Church.
18:12Now, Alison has already received the best gift of all a few weeks ago when Prince Harry
18:18lip-synced to one of your exchanges from Bake Off.
18:21I thought I was dreaming when I saw that.
18:23So here's the perfectly timed clip with Stephen Colbert.
18:27If you was treated like a king for the day, what would you want me to do for you?
18:32Bec for me probably.
18:33You'd want me to do what?
18:35Bec.
18:36Bec.
18:37Bec.
18:38Bec.
18:39Bec.
18:40Bec.
18:41Bec.
18:42Bec.
18:43Bec.
18:44Bec.
18:45Bec.
18:46Bec.
18:47Bec.
18:48Bec.
18:49Bec.
18:50What a weird moment.
18:51Crazy.
18:52I mean, someone's like, oh my god, Prince Harry, me and Prince Harry are connected now.
18:57You're totally like that.
18:58You know what I mean?
18:59We're tied.
19:00Yeah.
19:01I mean, how can I be humble now?
19:02Do you know what I mean?
19:03Does it make me kind of like royalty now?
19:05Like, am I a princess?
19:06Am I?
19:07Yeah.
19:08But it does appear that Prince Harry has got a lot of time on his hands now.
19:12What do you reckon?
19:13Harry, what are your Christmas traditions?
19:25Um, well, we always, what we do with the TV, when we have the Christmas lunch.
19:31Yep.
19:32And then we have, we've got one of those TVs that you can bring round, you know, it comes,
19:36you can angle it round.
19:37It's on the wall, but you can angle it round.
19:38Yep.
19:39And so we bring it round so that it's across the other side of the table.
19:43And then we have the King's Speech on there.
19:45So it's like he's joining us.
19:47LAUGHTER
19:48For dinner.
19:50What's that?
19:51Yeah.
19:52It has been a tough year for a lot of people.
19:54LAUGHTER
19:57And look, we talked about Alex's 13-foot tree in his garden.
20:00Anything special in your garden this Christmas?
20:02Oh, well, we've got robins, actually.
20:05Nessie.
20:06Aw.
20:07Yeah, I know.
20:08We put up a nesting box last year.
20:11Yeah.
20:12And we've got some, actually some baby robins in there.
20:14Aw.
20:15Yeah, and I've actually got a camera.
20:17You know, one of those little tiny cameras?
20:18Oh, yeah, yeah.
20:19Yeah.
20:20It's got a bird watch.
20:21Yeah, with like a live feed.
20:22Yeah.
20:23Could we see that, or...?
20:25We have got it.
20:26Yes, yes, we can.
20:27Yes, we can.
20:28Let's see the live feed of your...
20:29There's a little robin in there this morning.
20:30Oh, that's so lovely.
20:31But, um...
20:32LAUGHTER
20:36Oh, that's really upsetting.
20:37Yeah.
20:38Talk about a live feed.
20:39Meh.
20:40All right, we'll have more lastly for you after the break as we chat to Rick Astley and find
20:55out which one of our guests had a crush on him as a teenager.
20:58See you in a little bit.
20:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
21:04Welcome back to Last Leg.
21:19We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Gill.
21:22Uh, Alex is starting to change like Tim Allen in, uh...
21:26I'm not.
21:27Are you not?
21:28Are you not?
21:29No, I'm all right, mate.
21:30I don't think that's how you looked in the last part.
21:32That's absolutely the same, mate.
21:34OK.
21:35All right, Josh, do you want to explain what's going on with you?
21:38I'm going through the Band-Aid video.
21:40LAUGHTER
21:41I, er...
21:42I didn't know Hanson were in Band-Aid.
21:44LAUGHTER
21:45Handsome?
21:46LAUGHTER
21:47I can't hear much, by the way.
21:49LAUGHTER
21:50I'm Sting from Band-Aid.
21:52Look at that.
21:53LAUGHTER
21:54Amazing.
21:55Bang on.
21:56I can't hear anything.
21:58LAUGHTER
21:59I'm getting Gail Tilsley off coordination.
22:01LAUGHTER
22:03Anyone else doing that?
22:05APPLAUSE
22:06I'm getting...
22:07I'm getting Gail Tilsley and Paul Hollywood.
22:10LAUGHTER
22:12And obviously I'm now Tom Hanks as Woody from Toy Story.
22:15Oh, yes.
22:16Oh, yeah.
22:17Because the final scene of Toy Story is when they all become friends
22:19at Christmas.
22:20Yes.
22:21Time now to welcome another guest to the Last Leg Christmas
22:23celebration.
22:24He's a soul singer whose songs may be the one thing your family
22:27doesn't fight over this Christmas.
22:28Please welcome...
22:29Rick Astley.
22:30CHEERING
22:31CHEERING
22:32CHEERING
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22:53CHEERING
22:54Welcome to the party, Rick.
22:55What are your Christmas traditions?
22:56Erm, eating and drinking, I think, pretty much.
22:59Yes.
23:00My wife is Danish and we have quite a lot of Scandinavian tradition
23:03in our Christmas.
23:04Bacon?
23:05Er, yeah, a lot of bacon, actually.
23:06LAUGHTER
23:07Yeah, yeah.
23:08But also, erm, they celebrate on the eve, on the 24th.
23:12Yes.
23:13So we've got into that habit over the years of doing that.
23:15So...
23:16Well, I'm very sorry that you're here tonight on Christmas Eve.
23:18I know.
23:19Well, exactly.
23:20I'm...
23:21Exactly.
23:22I'm straight back there after this.
23:23LAUGHTER
23:24If there's anything left, I'll be, er, you know, lovely.
23:27LAUGHTER
23:28No, so, to be honest, tomorrow is a bit like our boxing day,
23:31to be honest.
23:32Right.
23:33A bit more chill and, you know, so...
23:34Yep.
23:35Yeah.
23:36Now, we asked AI to suggest a present for you.
23:37I can't wait.
23:38OK.
23:39LAUGHTER
23:40It said maybe a rare vinyl copy of something like The Smiths.
23:43Yeah.
23:44Because you did a show of Smith songs at Glastonbury.
23:46Indeed I did.
23:47I saw it.
23:48Which, yeah, you saw it and one of our team was there
23:50and captured the joy Josh felt as he watched you perform.
23:53This is genuine footage.
23:55Back on the streets of Birmingham
23:59I wander to myself
24:03Will I dare to be saved again
24:07With each side straight as you sit down
24:10I wander to myself
24:13What a nice!
24:15One of the best hours of my life!
24:18Good job!
24:19And watching that video
24:21This is going to blow your mind
24:23That was after I stopped drinking
24:25LAUGHTER
24:27Right, OK
24:28Harry, you share Rick's love of Morrissey's music
24:31Er...
24:32Oh, his music? Yeah, not so much his music
24:34LAUGHTER
24:35LAUGHTER
24:37But you...
24:38Don't talk about that, do we?
24:40You performed as Morrissey?
24:41I was...
24:42I did Morrissey in Stars in there
24:44I remember
24:45We have a dazzling clip of the enthusiastic performance
24:47from the turn of the millennium
24:49APPLAUSE
24:50Meritsey!
24:51APPLAUSE
24:52APPLAUSE
24:53I'm a punctured bicycle
25:05I'll dance on it
25:09Oh, let you make a man of me, yeah
25:14When in this charming car
25:19This charming car
25:24APPLAUSE
25:25Very good!
25:27Very good!
25:28Have you ever met Morrissey?
25:29I haven't met Morrissey, but part of it was you had to get permission.
25:32So I had to get permission from Morrissey to impersonate him.
25:35There was a...
25:36Or to do that song
25:38And I got a fax through
25:40In the old days of faxes
25:41And it was...
25:42It was signed by Morrissey saying,
25:44Good luck
25:45Morrissey
25:46And I...
25:47So I thought, oh
25:48So Morrissey's on the other end of this number
25:50The number is there
25:51I thought, well, I'll...
25:52And I had this idea
25:53So I sent him a fax back
25:55Saying, how about you and me do a novelty single
25:58For Christmas
25:59Our version of Little Donkey
26:01Wow
26:02LAUGHTER
26:03But I never...
26:04Never heard back
26:05I mean, you've got your own quiff
26:08I have
26:09I have to wear an artificial one
26:10But if you liked
26:11I could...
26:12Would you like me to reprise the...
26:14Would you like...
26:15Yes!
26:16Have you got the...
26:17I don't know...
26:18I'm not feeling it
26:19Come on!
26:25What a showman!
26:26He knows how to get the crowd going
26:30Here we go
26:31Here we go
26:32Oh!
26:35Lovely
26:36Which...
26:37It's uncanny
26:39Little donkey
26:42Little donkey
26:44On a dusty road
26:47Keep on
26:49Flooding onwards
26:50With your hair
26:51Oh!
26:52Oh!
26:53Oh!
26:54Oh!
26:55Oh!
26:56Oh!
26:57Oh!
26:58Oh!
26:59Oh!
27:00Oh!
27:01Oh!
27:02Oh!
27:03Oh!
27:04Merry Christmas
27:05So good
27:06Alison, is it true you had a teenage crush on Rick?
27:09Well it's not the sort of place I would like probably admit it with Rick literally sitting there but he already knows we've met quite a few times and now I'm quite cool with it
27:20Are you?
27:21Like I'm alright, I'm totally cool with like being in the...
27:23As long as Harry's sat between us
27:24Oh yeah exactly
27:26So Alison just to clarify your story you used to fancy Rick Astley then you met him and now it's gone away
27:33Not at all Josh!
27:36Obviously I've still got feelings but there is like you know
27:39Have you?
27:40Do you want to expand on that?
27:43Listen
27:44I'm not saying there's a chance
27:45There's a wife
27:46There's a wife
27:48I feel like I'm the...
27:50Come on Harry
27:51Come on Harry
27:52Come on Harry
27:53Get there
27:54Oh no
27:55I don't know where I'm not wanted
28:00Listen
28:03Obviously I was a lot younger than I am now and obviously I still get the same feelings
28:12I'm going to say it there's a chance you're going to be Rick Rolled
28:18Come back Harry!
28:20Come back Harry!
28:22Alison on the very night that his wife is celebrating Christmas
28:28Well she's not here is she?
28:29Yes sir
28:30Just out of interest Rick where can Alison see you perform next year?
28:37Yeah!
28:39Um here there and everywhere we're on store in April
28:42Um which...
28:43Are we?
28:44Yes we're all on store
28:46Um
28:47Short notice
28:49So um
28:50Yes
28:51We can't wait
28:52We can't wait we're looking forward to it
28:53And now Harry you and Alison both host different versions of Bake Off but you have brought your own showstopper to the show tonight
29:00Yeah I've got to go back there again
29:02Go on!
29:04Well I just think you know people forget um what Christmas is really about
29:09Yeah
29:10And what they concentrate on is the food you know it's all about the food
29:14Mm
29:15So what I've done is I've done a um my own
29:18A savoury
29:19Nativity
29:21Um
29:22Frazzles!
29:23I love it!
29:24Which I've made
29:26Which I've made myself and what
29:28Just trying to get the message of Christmas through
29:31Through
29:33Through food
29:35Smells lovely
29:36And
29:37Do you want me to talk you through it?
29:39Yeah
29:40So these are Frazzles on the roof of the uh
29:43That's the it's a Pomb Bear
29:46As the Angel Gabriel
29:49And then we have the three kings here which I made from Pepparamis because they're spicy a bit more exotic
29:58Um
29:59You've got the two sausages here
30:02Joseph and Mary
30:03Obviously Joseph is a bit taller than Mary
30:05Yeah
30:06Um
30:07And then you've got the star of the show the baby Jesus
30:11Which is a pig in blanket and there's the
30:15I don't mean that in a sort of negative you know you know
30:19I don't want any trouble
30:22And then you've got the manger made out of chip sticks they're nice
30:26And then you've got the halo there
30:28So that's just something that perhaps people could you know make their own tradition now
30:32The savoury nativity
30:35Would you like to?
30:36Have you got it in kit form?
30:37Try
30:38Do you like you sell it in a kit?
30:39Could you?
30:40It's about 12 quid
30:42I mean the slight problem with it is to secure the sausages
30:45You do have to use some screws
30:49We're going to have more last leg for you after the break as Alex performs a hallmark Christmas scene we've written just for tonight
30:57But right now Rick Astley is going to perform his first Christmas hit of the night
31:02Before he does though we've talked a lot about Alex's love of Christmas
31:05But Lib Dem leader Ed Davey revealed in an interview this year that he listens to Christmas tunes all year round
31:12Wow
31:13How do we feel about that? Is that alright?
31:15But isn't his birthday on Christmas Day? That's the reason isn't it?
31:18I think his birthday is on Christmas Day so that's probably one of the reasons why it means a lot to him
31:23Yeah, because otherwise it would just be fucking weird
31:25Well, he's going to make the next bit awkward
31:40Rick is going to play us into the break but who better to introduce him
31:44Than the leader of the Lib Dems
31:47Sir Head Davey
31:51Hi guys, it's Head Davey here
31:53Merry Christmas to you all
31:55It's true, I like listening to Christmas music all year round
31:59The reason is my daughter and I love winding up her mum
32:03And it's on my iPhone and we play it in the car all the time
32:07I'm never going to give up Christmas
32:10So here's Rick Astley
32:11Rick Astley
32:21Sleigh bells ring
32:23Are you listening?
32:25In a lane
32:27Snow is glistening
32:29A beautiful sight
32:31We're happy tonight
32:33Walking in a winter wonderland
32:35Let's go
32:36To the end of the night
32:38We'll feel alive
32:40Later on
32:41We'll conspire
32:43As we dream
32:44By the fire
32:46To face unafraid
32:47The plans that remain
32:49Walking in a winter wonderland
32:51Let's go
32:55Talk it, let's go
33:26Welcome back to Last Leg.
33:31We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill.
33:34Alex, you're definitely changing.
33:36I feel a little bit more Christmassy at the moment.
33:38Do you? Yeah.
33:39I'm feeling it a little bit different at the moment, but...
33:42You're definitely progressing. No, I haven't.
33:45OK. Josh, would you like to explain who you are now?
33:49No, I'm from the Band Aid video. Yeah.
33:52So I'm Sarah Dallin from Bananarama, of course.
33:55LAUGHTER
34:00Look at these jeans. They're fucking brilliant.
34:03APPLAUSE
34:05It ain't what I do, it's the way that I do it.
34:07We've always said it.
34:09And obviously, I'm Tom Hanks in the movie Forrest Gump,
34:12because he famously said life is like a box of chocolates
34:14and the main time you get chocolates is at Christmas.
34:17LAUGHTER
34:19You still look a bit like you're going to strip.
34:21LAUGHTER
34:23Yeah, Forrest Hump.
34:25LAUGHTER
34:26And now, throughout the show, we've been putting Alex through his paces
34:28to see how he'd fare on the US reality series Finding Mr Christmas.
34:32The winner of the first series, by the way, earned a leading role
34:35in a holiday movie about the owner of a Seattle dog shelter
34:38who falls for a meticulous web page editor.
34:41The movie was called Happy Howlidays.
34:45Love it.
34:46See what you did there.
34:47And see what they did there.
34:48Love it.
34:49All right, I'm going to send everyone, if you could all go over
34:50and get ready for the next challenge for Alex, please.
34:52Right.
34:53Over in that corner of the studio.
34:55So, Alex's final challenge tonight is to test out his acting chops
34:59in a scene we've written as the ultimate hallmark Christmas movie.
35:04Lights.
35:05Camera.
35:06Christmas.
35:14Help!
35:15Help, I need an emergency appointment.
35:17Oh, my God.
35:18It's Alison Hammond, the big city TV presenter.
35:21That's right.
35:22I've become so career focused, I've lost touch with what's important
35:26in life.
35:27I'm single and I'm home for the holidays.
35:30And?
35:32And I've hit a dog.
35:37Oh, my God, what happened?
35:52I'll tell you what happened.
35:54It's quite difficult to talk because it's really tight on the jaw.
35:57At least do a dog voice.
36:07I'll tell you what happened.
36:08That's better.
36:09Yeah, is that better?
36:10That's better.
36:11I was just sitting there by the side of the road licking my own balls
36:14and she came round the corner like a lunatic and hit me.
36:17Yeah, but he's such a cute ear.
36:19I've really fallen for him.
36:21Is there anyone here who can treat him?
36:24I can't let him die.
36:25I'm the presenter of For the Love of Dogs.
36:29Of course, Miss Hammond.
36:30Do you know what?
36:31The hot vet will see you now.
36:32Oh.
36:33But I'm next.
36:34I'm sorry, Mr Hill.
36:35Your cat's going to have to wait.
36:36It's not the cat I'm worried about.
36:38It's the Robins.
36:48I'm afraid Miss Hammond is next.
36:50But I'm on the telly.
36:51I know, but not as much as Alison.
36:53No one's on the telly as much as Alison.
36:58The hot vet will see you now.
37:04Somebody order a dream boat.
37:06Are you the hot vet?
37:08Yes.
37:09I'm sweating buckets.
37:10Do you know how hard it is to operate with these little hands?
37:13You look like a man who could really heal my heart.
37:17I mean, dog.
37:18What kind of dog is it?
37:19I don't know.
37:20One of those really little whiny ones by the looks of it.
37:26I'll tell you what.
37:27Why don't you come back to my charming little cottage and have Christmas with me and my children?
37:31They've been missing a mother figure in their life ever since my wife died in a tragic Christmas kite accident.
37:37Oh.
37:38I don't know.
37:39Yeah, and then we could go back to the big city and maybe you could become the resident vet on this morning.
37:45Bosh!
37:48There you go, little fella.
37:50Oh, what?
37:51Get that on there, boy.
37:52Is that it?
37:54Stop whinging or I'll cut your bollocks off.
37:56Come on, princess.
37:58Let's go.
38:04Oi, what about my robins?
38:10This Christmas, Alex Brooker is the hot vet in Hallmark's new movie, Vet the Hall.
38:26All right, it's time to bring out a Christmassy mystery guest.
38:31Harry and Alison have to try to work out why they were in the news this year.
38:35Can we please have this week's mystery guest?
38:38Mystery guest, mystery guest, Christmas mystery guest.
38:43Oh, what fun it is to have a Christmas mystery guest.
38:47Guest!
38:49Welcome, Josh.
38:50Alex, who is the mystery guest?
38:51This is Rob.
38:52He was in the news this year for a Christmassy reason.
38:55But what was it?
38:56Can we have the dramatic lighting change, please?
39:01So, did Rob get suspended from Broadland Radio for playing
39:05All I Want For Christmas Is You on October 3rd?
39:09Did he get suspended as a school exam invigilator
39:12after playing Merry Christmas Everyone by Slade
39:15to signal the end of the final exam?
39:18Or did Rob get suspended by an undertaker
39:20after mistakenly playing Last Christmas
39:23rather than the last post at a funeral?
39:31What do you think?
39:32Well, I don't think you'd make a mistake at a funeral.
39:34You'd be well prepared.
39:35Does he look like an undertaker?
39:41That's a grave digger.
39:42That's a grave digger, yeah.
39:43I'll tell you what, we'll reveal the mystery guest after the break.
39:48Rick Astley is going to sing us into Christmas.
39:50We'll see you in a little bit.
39:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
40:08Welcome back to Last Leg.
40:10We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill.
40:12Alex has now become full Father Christmas.
40:15Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!
40:19There you go.
40:21CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
40:24You know what?
40:25In another reality where the cards had fallen different,
40:28he'd currently be doing that in a grotto in a garden centre.
40:32You're not entirely sure what's going on with your costume.
40:34Well, I didn't think we had very long,
40:37so I was the dog already,
40:38so I just shoved mine on top of the dog.
40:41LAUGHTER
40:42OK.
40:43So I'm Boy George.
40:45LAUGHTER
40:54Do you know what I'm calling this outfit?
40:55What?
40:56Here, Boy George.
40:58Oh, lovely.
40:59Lovely.
41:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:04And clearly, I'm Tom Hanks from Castaway,
41:06because when he first experiences pain
41:08due to an infected tooth
41:09that goes on to become an ongoing issue
41:10whilst he's on the island,
41:12he's at a Christmas dinner.
41:14LAUGHTER
41:15Oh, and I've got the volleyball as well.
41:17Um...
41:18Hooray!
41:20LAUGHTER
41:22We recognise that handprint.
41:24LAUGHTER
41:26Before the break,
41:27we challenged our guest to work out
41:28how this person was connected to the news.
41:30Can we have the options again, please?
41:32Yes, this is Rob,
41:35and he was connected to the news this year
41:37for a Christmassy reason.
41:38But what was it?
41:39Was it because Rob got suspended
41:41from Broadland Radio
41:42for playing
41:43All I Want For Christmas Is You
41:44on October the 3rd?
41:46Was it because he got suspended
41:47as a school exam invigilator
41:49after playing Merry Christmas Everyone
41:50by Slade
41:51to signal the end of the final exam?
41:53Or...
41:54Did he get suspended by an undertaker
41:56after mistakenly playing last Christmas
41:58rather than the last post at a funeral?
42:02Ho, ho!
42:03Yeah.
42:04Harry, Ellison?
42:06Oh!
42:07Could we...
42:08Could you say something sort of local radio-ish?
42:11That we could see whether...
42:12Coming up on the show!
42:14Well, hi, folks.
42:15Hope you're having a good Sunday.
42:16Uh...
42:17Yeah.
42:18Is that it?
42:19We've got a good voice for radio.
42:20What do you think?
42:21Could you say...
42:22You could have said no, Rob.
42:23LAUGHTER
42:24Shall we go with the radio?
42:29Yes.
42:30It's very...
42:31Would they suspend someone just for playing...
42:33It's a bit mean, isn't it?
42:34If they've done that, that is mean.
42:36It's a cutthroat world local.
42:37I won't be listening to that radio station anyway,
42:39if the banding...
42:40Exactly.
42:41Well, that's the last time you listened to Broadland radio, isn't it?
42:44LAUGHTER
42:45Well, I thought you said Broadmoor.
42:49LAUGHTER
42:50LAUGHTER
42:51All right, Rob.
42:53Rob, can you reveal your identity, please?
42:58I am indeed Rob Chandler,
43:00breakfast presenter at Broadland radio,
43:02and I was suspended for playing a Mariah Carey Christmas song
43:06early in October.
43:07Amazing.
43:08Ooh, gee!
43:11So why did you play it, and then why did they suspend you?
43:14Well, it started with a text from a listener called Becky,
43:18who said she was putting out her Christmas stock in her shop,
43:22and could I play a Christmas song?
43:24So I thought, tell you what,
43:25if I get at least five listener texts saying,
43:28Ho, ho, ho...
43:30Ho, ho, ho!
43:31Exactly.
43:33I'll consider it.
43:34And we did.
43:35We got a load of texts saying, Ho, ho, ho.
43:38One or two saying, No, no, no.
43:40But...
43:41Then Billy the Taxi Driver...
43:43You must know Billy the Taxi Driver.
43:45No.
43:46Um...
43:47LAUGHTER
43:49Another keen listener text and said,
43:52There's a tub of chocolates in it for you,
43:55if you play Mariah Carey.
43:57All I want for Christmas is you.
43:59So, came back after the news, and I read that text out,
44:03and I said, quite frankly, I'm disappointed, Billy,
44:06that you could think I could be so shallow to fall...
44:10Here we go.
44:11..for such a blatant bribe.
44:13Yeah.
44:14Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
44:17Oh!
44:18He played a song.
44:19How long was he suspended for?
44:21How long was he suspended for?
44:22One day.
44:23Oh, is that all?
44:24Yeah.
44:25Did you go shopping?
44:26What did he do?
44:27Well, he just stayed in bed all day.
44:28Chill day.
44:29Yeah.
44:30Can we please have a round of applause for Ron?
44:33CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:38All right, we are about to end the show with a Christmas sing-along from Rick Astley, but
44:42before we do, would you please thank our guests, Alison Hammond, Harry Hill, and my co-host,
44:51Josh Riddicombe, and Alex Brooker.
44:56We'll be back next week for our New Year's Eve special with an incredible line-up.
44:59Musician Peter Doherty, comedians Maisie, Adam and Phil Wang, national treasure Sir Lenny
45:03Henry, TV personality Danny Dyer, rugby star Hannah Botterman, lioness Lucy Bronze, as well
45:09as a celebrity barman who is 100% faithful.
45:12Right now, though, Rick Astley is going to sing us into Christmas.
45:17Thanks for watching and last week.
45:18My name's Adam Hills.
45:19Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good night.
45:22You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why, Santa Claus
45:39it's coming to town It's snowing road, let's go!
45:44He sees you when you're sleeping
46:13He knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake
46:23You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why, Santa Claus
46:32Santa Claus is coming to town He's got eight billion toys on his sleigh
46:39He's packed, he's coming your way Santa, it's coming to town
46:49He's coming to town
46:50Ba ba ba da, ba ba da ba ba ba ba Ba
46:52Hooray!
46:53Merry Christmas!
46:54Yay!
46:55Thank you, again.
46:56ihr
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