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00:00What goes on?
00:04Thank you for letting us be ourselves
00:06So don't mind me if I repeat myself
00:08These simple lines be good for your health
00:11You keep them crime rhymes on the shelf
00:13Live my life like you just don't care
00:15Five thousand leaders never scared
00:18Strange noises to long with day fear
00:20Get up, still a beautiful idea
00:22Get up, throw your hands in the air
00:25Get up, it's shooting you
00:27Get up, get up
00:29Sit on the couch, kick off your boots and dry your foot by the fire.
00:42It's Friday, we're live, and it's time for The Last Leg.
00:46Tonight on the show, Donald Trump blows hot and cold.
00:50Labor gets an icy reception.
00:53And we hail the new angel on our Christmas tree.
00:55Plus, we'll be joined by comedians Harriet Kemsley and Catherine Ryan on the show that
01:01sometimes gets snowed under by the news.
01:11G'day!
01:13Hi, everyone.
01:14I'm Adam Hills.
01:15Welcome to The Last Leg, the show that's a lot like day one of The Ashes, because there's
01:19plenty of exposed stumps.
01:22With me, as always, are the pride of Dartmoor, Josh Whittacombe, and the man who thinks a
01:25wicked sequel is Home Alone 2, Lost in New York, Alex Brooker.
01:35Now, we will get into the big news in a second, but this week, in a meeting that we were having
01:39in the office, Josh uttered a sentence that shocked us all.
01:43No, he didn't say, it's okay, I can reach the top shelf.
01:47And it certainly wasn't, actually, I think I have made too many jokes about Alex's hands.
01:51Or it wasn't, of course it's not my real voice.
01:54Josh, what did you say?
01:57Well, I just said that I'd spent the week doing some tiling in the house, and you thought...
02:01Genuinely!
02:03If I'd have said that, it would have been less surprising.
02:06I don't know why it's so surprising.
02:08It's just a normal thing for me to do.
02:09I just do a bit of DIY.
02:11I'm a real man.
02:12I sounded, sorry, I sounded like Pinocchio, then.
02:16I mean, look, you've been assembling me for the last 14 years before the show.
02:21But still, it was...
02:23So, yeah, so I'm having a room, I had to soundproof a room.
02:27Right.
02:28Why?
02:28For podcasts rather than...
02:30Oh, thank God for that!
02:31Yeah, I had to black out some windows.
02:33Soundproof a room.
02:34Yeah, because I've got, I've taken someone prisoner.
02:36And so I had to do, I had to get a topical reference, and I had to do, I had to do the
02:44ceiling, so I did it with tiles, and I did a good job.
02:47Yeah, we have a photo, here are the tiles in place.
02:49Look at that!
02:49All jokes aside, Josh, those tiles look like they've been laid by a professional.
02:54Thank you very much.
02:55Do you know what?
02:56Don't patronise me.
02:59That's the lowest moment of my career.
03:00That third one, if you pull it down, you can get into the air vents like Bruce Willis on Die Hard.
03:06I should say also, it was actually a floor on that photo, it's the wrong way up.
03:14Alex, you've been doing a bit of DIY work as well.
03:16Yeah, have you noticed a big time of year for me, with Christmas coming up, so I've been
03:20doing a lot, so got a ladder out to hold for my father-in-law, really, so there we go.
03:26There I am.
03:27Who wouldn't feel safe looking down and seeing that geezer?
03:31Taking a selfie while holding a ladder with one hand.
03:36It looks like that, I reckon you could use that, too, for either of the two main news stories
03:42next week.
03:43One is, pervert window cleaner found.
03:46And the other is, picture found a first suspect in Louvre heist.
03:53But I think, I think it made me get, it got me thinking, because obviously, you know, we're
03:59both, we're both, you know, we're doing our DIY now, and I think that there's something
04:05in it, I think there's a show in it.
04:06Mm-hmm.
04:07I think we could picture on the DIY show.
04:08I don't, but if you say so, yeah.
04:10I think, you know, I kept thinking, like, it'd market it.
04:12Yeah.
04:13Handyman and little handyman.
04:14Who would have, there you go, a couple of tools get the job done.
04:18I'll just say, to the person that did that Photoshop, and it is a Photoshop, how are my arms the
04:27ones you failed to get wrong?
04:28Failed to get right, I meant I fucked up saying failed to get wrong.
04:34We are live on your telly right now.
04:35How did I get that wrong?
04:37I was having, sorry.
04:38Send us any questions you want to ask us about the news.
04:41Instagram, the hashtag is, is it okay?
04:42WhatsApp, the number's 07956175908, or you can scan the QR code on the screen.
04:48For example, Bayview Boys said, is it okay for Scotland to reach World Cup finals after
04:5328 years?
04:54Hooray!
04:55Yes, it bloody is.
04:59Scotland is currently on day three of a hangover after their men's football team beat Denmark
05:03in injury time.
05:05With Denmark pushing for a draw, Scotland's Kenny McLean took a shot from beyond halfway to
05:10seal the result, and the BBC radio commentators were anything but impartial.
05:16As Gielman has it, he's surrounded, he pokes the ball back, surely now Scotland will hold
05:21on to possession, it's McLean, he's looking to go for goal, from halfway line, it's Chip Schmitt!
05:32Glorious, glorious, Kenny McLean from the halfway line, Scotland four, Denmark two,
05:40we are returning to the World Cup, what a night!
05:49What?
05:52The thing I love most about those goals, the goals they scored every day, like, you couldn't,
05:56you started to quite hear it on the clip there, is that when Scotland score, they immediately
06:02start playing the Proclaimers 500 miles.
06:04So the second they score, you've got people doing a nut and you just hear, dun, dun, dun,
06:08da-da-da-da-da!
06:09And honestly, you never get moments like that in, like, real life.
06:13Like, imagine how good Proclaimers would be over the big moments in your life, imagine
06:17like the birth of your children, just as the head starts to pop at you, like, dun, dun,
06:21dun, dun, all the nurses, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da!
06:25And one of the best photos of the match was this shot of Scott McTominay, who nailed an incredible,
06:31incredibly athletic bicycle kick.
06:33Um, that's, that is, do you know what, I don't want to brag.
06:36Yeah.
06:37That is the position I was in, that's how I put up the final tile on the ceiling.
06:42There was an amazing thing with Scott McTominay, after he scored the goal, he ran to the crowd,
06:46and he genuinely asked, where's my mum?
06:48And what I love most about it is, like, no matter what, what age you get to, what level of achievement you get to,
06:54you're still always that seven-year-old boy who goes, hey mum, did you just see that?
06:58That was good!
06:59What's amazing is he not only scored the goal, he also impersonated the flag of the Isle of Man.
07:04LAUGHTER
07:08Um, and look, last week we asked you to nominate an angel for the last late Christmas tree,
07:11we are going to reveal the winner at the end of the show, but we also thought tonight we'd make up some honorary baubles.
07:16Oh, yes. Alex, what's the...
07:18I just thought the Scotland result was so incredible in the week, I genuinely cheered and trained.
07:23So I've got a little Scott McTominay bauble that I've been trusted to put on the tree,
07:28on a branch that's been conveniently signified to me with some orange tape.
07:32LAUGHTER
07:35There we go.
07:36Beautiful.
07:37Oh, that is nice.
07:38Well, we're all going to do one, I'm nominating Joe Marler.
07:40Oh, yeah.
07:41Oh, lovely.
07:42Right after Celebrity Traders, because I think if we've learned anything from Celebrity Traders,
07:45it's to trust the instincts of a rugby player.
07:47Oh, for God.
07:48How do you ruin everything good?
07:51Remember, Claudia said on the show, celebrities have people lie to them all the time, and she's right.
07:56All celebrities ever hear are things like, oh, your show's amazing.
07:59Oh, I loved your latest album.
08:00Oh, all jokes aside, Josh, those tiles look like they've been laid by a professional.
08:04LAUGHTER
08:05There's no bullshit on a rugby pitch.
08:06Do you know what?
08:07You're all wankers.
08:08You're really talking like a builder now.
08:09LAUGHTER
08:10There's no bullshit on a rugby pitch.
08:11Also, that tree needs putting up in a different angle, sorry.
08:12Look, there's no bullshit on a rugby pitch.
08:13Look at the scrums.
08:14When your face is that close to another man's arse, you can tell if he's a faithful or a traitor.
08:17LAUGHTER
08:18I'm going to put this up here.
08:19Joe Marler, if I ever meet you, and I hope I do one day, I want you to scoop me up like a rugby ball and climb up.
08:24You're all wankers.
08:25You're really talking like a builder now.
08:26There's no bullshit on a rugby pitch.
08:27Look at the scrums.
08:28When your face is that close to another man's arse, you can tell if he's a faithful or a traitor.
08:31LAUGHTER
08:40And Josh, people who are honest, that's what you've gone for, Adam.
08:53And there's only one person who's publicly on TV been more honest and themselves this year.
08:59I don't know if you saw Romesh Ranganathan's parents evening.
09:02Oh, here we go.
09:04But Alex Brooker was overshadowed by the real star of the show, his mum, Elaine Brooker.
09:09Mm-hm.
09:10Let's have a look at one of the many brilliant clips of it.
09:14He comes across as a bit fixed.
09:16Yeah.
09:17But he was actually really clever.
09:20Really clever.
09:21I wondered why you wanted photos of my mum.
09:25LAUGHTER
09:26Well, all the ones she sends me...
09:28Oh, you...
09:29Oh, sorry, that's...
09:30So gaudy now he's in the train.
09:32Sorry, one day on the building site and look what I've become.
09:35So there she is, Elaine, she's on the tree and, um...
09:38Stop gently caressing.
09:41LAUGHTER
09:42Don't!
09:43LAUGHTER
09:46All right, on to the news of the week now.
09:48And as the world celebrated International Men's Day, Laura said,
09:51is it OK that Donald Trump called a female journalist piggy?
09:54No, it is not, Laura. Here is the disturbing footage.
09:58It's not all right, is it?
10:09No.
10:10And the only person allowed to say quiet piggy is Kermit the Frog.
10:12LAUGHTER
10:13And even then he's risking a karate chop.
10:15LAUGHTER
10:16Didn't David Cameron say something similar to that?
10:19LAUGHTER
10:20LAUGHTER
10:21LAUGHTER
10:23LAUGHTER
10:24How the fuck up my memory?
10:26LAUGHTER
10:27A few days later, Donald Trump hosted one of the only world leaders
10:30with a worse track record of dealing with both women
10:32and journalists than him, Saudi Arabia's Mohammed bin Salman.
10:35Here they are in the Oval Office.
10:37Yes, an authoritarian leader who's carried out a campaign
10:40of intimidation against the press next to Mohammed bin Salman.
10:43LAUGHTER
10:44They look like they're just about to do a cool handshake, don't they?
10:48And look at the room as well, even bin Salman's thinking,
10:51come on, this is a bit gaudy.
10:53LAUGHTER
10:54You see, they kind of, they were so happy together.
10:56Yeah.
10:57They were so, they kind of, at most times,
10:59they kind of looked like an episode of first dates
11:01that had gone really well.
11:02And they were kind of like they were going to turn around and go,
11:04do you know what, yeah, I'd love to see him again
11:06and be misogynistic together, I think it would be...
11:08Fantastic, but there was, there was, you know,
11:10the thing with them too is, you know, you know your ghostbusters,
11:12it's like the gatekeeper and the keymaster.
11:14Oh, yeah.
11:15Like, you don't want to get these two together.
11:16But if you were a mutual friend of them,
11:18you would have gone, like, I'll tell you what,
11:20I'll tell you what, Donald, I know who you'd love.
11:22Yeah.
11:23You would get on with my friend Mohammed bin Salman so much.
11:25You two.
11:26Look, the meeting was controversial
11:27because US intelligence have said that bin Salman
11:30likely ordered the murder and dismemberment
11:32of Washington Post journalist Jamal Khashoggi.
11:34The Guardian even ran with this brutal headline,
11:37Trump and Mr. Bonesaw stage loving
11:40as Saudi's $1 trillion wipes the bloody slate clean.
11:42They called him Mr. Bonesaw.
11:44Mr. Bonesaw sounds like a YouTuber
11:47on I'm a Celebrity that I haven't heard of.
11:50I mean, it doesn't sound like a great Mr. member, I must say.
11:53What happened to Mr. Tickle? That was fun.
11:56Mr. Bonesaw to me sounds like the follow-up
11:58to the song Mr. Brightside.
12:00But still by the killers.
12:03Really nice.
12:05Between bin Salman and Trump,
12:06you've got Bonespurs and Bonesaw,
12:08which I'm going to pitch as a new cop drama, by the way.
12:11See, Bonespurs and Bonesaw
12:13could be another name for our building business.
12:17Mary Bruce from ABC News raised the controversy
12:19of hosting a man the CIA accused of killing
12:21and dismembering a US citizen.
12:23Watch who Trump jumps to defend in this shocking clip.
12:27Your Royal Highness, the US intelligence concluded
12:30that you orchestrated the brutal murder of a journalist.
12:339-11 families are furious that you are here in the Oval Office.
12:36Who are you with?
12:37Why should Americans trust you?
12:38Who are you with?
12:39And the same to you, Mr. President.
12:40Who are you with?
12:41I'm with ABC News, sir.
12:42You're with who?
12:43ABC News, sir.
12:44Fake News. ABC Fake News.
12:45One of the worst in the business.
12:47But I'll answer your question.
12:48Okay.
12:49As far as this gentleman is concerned,
12:51he's done a phenomenal job.
12:52You're mentioning somebody that was extremely controversial.
12:56A lot of people didn't like that gentleman that you're talking about.
12:59Whether you like him or didn't like him,
13:01things happen.
13:02But he knew nothing about it.
13:04And we can leave it at that.
13:05You don't have to embarrass our guest by asking a question like that.
13:08You don't have to embarrass our guest like that,
13:10says the man who berated Zelensky for not wearing a suit.
13:14And by the way, neither was Bin Salman.
13:16Also, and the way he called him a gentleman.
13:18This gentleman.
13:19Please don't embarrass the gentleman who our own intelligence said
13:20cut up a journalist into tiny pieces.
13:22Trump is 30 seconds away from going,
13:24ha, your bone saw one journalist.
13:27To be fair, if I was sat next to Mohammed Bin Salman
13:30and someone started winding him up, I would be like,
13:32could you just stop with those kind of questions?
13:34Have you know what he can do to me?
13:36When Mary Bruce then tried to ask Trump about the release of the Epstein files,
13:39he embarked on a tirade that made Quiet Piggy sound like this girl can.
13:43Here's the staggering footage.
13:45Mr. President, why wait for Congress to release the Epstein files?
13:49Why not just do it now?
13:50You know, it's not the question that I mind.
13:53It's your attitude.
13:54I think you are a terrible reporter.
13:56You're all psyched.
13:58Somebody psychs you over at ABC.
14:00They're going to psych it.
14:01You're a terrible person
14:05and a terrible reporter.
14:09By the way, the BBC had to apologise to that geezer last week.
14:14He's insane.
14:15Yeah.
14:16Oh, Carol.
14:17No, what better way to show off in front of the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia
14:19than by berating a woman in public?
14:21He's slowly turning into the guy from Come Dine With Me
14:24who says you've got a sad little life change.
14:30And it's interesting that the two times Trump has snapped at women this week
14:33were both when he was being asked about the Epstein files.
14:36Which means his response to being connected to a man who degraded women
14:38was to degrade women.
14:40This week the US House of Representatives voted 427 to 1
14:43to release the Epstein files.
14:45The one dissenter was this guy.
14:47A guy called...
14:49Come on!
14:51Come on!
14:52It's George Calloway!
14:56He looks like he's gone.
14:57You can't release the files now.
14:58I'm about to solve the case single-handedly.
15:01You don't like when Hollyoaks get a new baddie who kills a load of people.
15:06That's Clay Higgins.
15:07He said it would be unfair to people named in the files
15:09who were innocent, apparently.
15:10Look, the Epstein files are now due to be released in just under a month
15:13and if Trump's name's in it,
15:14it's going to be awkward for the guy whose supporters voted for him
15:17in the belief that he can stop the country being run
15:19by a cabal of people connected to pedophiles.
15:22Newly released emails showed that Mark Epstein
15:25asked his brother Jeffrey Epstein in 2016
15:27to then ask Steve Bannon whether Vladimir...
15:29I can't believe I'm saying this.
15:31He asked whether Vladimir Putin has, quote,
15:35the photos of Trump blowing Bubba.
15:38Now, this caused a lot of discussion
15:40because Bubba is famously the nickname for Bill Clinton.
15:43Do you know there's a song about it?
15:44It's called I'm Forever Blowing Bubba.
15:47I mean, sure, like, I don't want to defend Trump,
15:50but I can't believe this was true.
15:53Like, that amount of fake tan and Bill Clinton...
15:56Surely, like, Hillary would have noticed
15:58if Bill Clinton had to come home
16:00and little Bill would have looked like a Watsit.
16:02Like...
16:05Epstein's brother Mark spoke out this week
16:07to say that Bubba didn't refer to Clinton,
16:09didn't say who it was,
16:10but then a rumour went round that Bubba...
16:12This is unbelievable.
16:13..was the name of Ghislaine Maxwell's horse.
16:18He's downloaded a VPN to watch the Grand National, hasn't he?
16:21You know what?
16:23I thought we were a progressive show,
16:25but here we are.
16:26Kink-shaming Donald Trump
16:28just because he's rumoured to have sucked off a horse.
16:31Are we...
16:32Are we judging him for that, are we?
16:34Just because he's in...
16:35Yeah, even the audience said yes.
16:37But this is...
16:38But this is the mad thing is that...
16:39Obviously, Trump said he'd sue the BBC for a bad edit.
16:42Yeah.
16:43This one may be a potential accusation
16:45that he's notched off a horse.
16:46Nothing.
16:47I love how when you asked the audience,
16:51it became pantomime as well.
16:53The horse is behind you!
16:55Pantomime horse.
16:56That's what it was.
16:58What's even weirder is that...
17:00This all went around last weekend.
17:01Should've got more.
17:02Okay.
17:03Ridiculous.
17:04Of course, none of it's true, right?
17:05But while it all went out,
17:06the White House suddenly released a series of photos
17:09of Trump and Melania in really loving poses.
17:12There they are.
17:13Look at that.
17:14Like...
17:15Then that made us wonder more about the horse.
17:20I mean, those photos were crying out for a Photoshop job.
17:23And since no-one else stepped up during the week...
17:25LAUGHTER
17:26LAUGHTER
17:31MUSIC PLAYS
17:34LAUGHTER
17:38APPLAUSE
17:44APPLAUSE
17:45APPLAUSE
17:47APPLAUSE
17:48APPLAUSE
17:50All right, let's welcome tonight's guests.
17:52The last one laughing and the first one roasting.
17:54please welcome comedians Harriet Kemsley and Katherine Ryan.
18:14Now, we've asked you both to prepare baubles.
18:17Katherine, who have you got?
18:19This year was underscored by nothing beats a Jet 2 holiday.
18:26And a lot of people drinking and falling and fighting
18:28and being removed from planes, and I loved that.
18:31So my bauble is just that company.
18:34Jet 2. You've got it there. You've got it there.
18:36It's over there on your little table there.
18:38And Harriet, who have you brought?
18:40I brought bubba.
18:44I just feel like he's gone through so much.
18:47That's maybe the sloppiest blowjob that's ever existed.
18:52LAUGHTER
18:54I brought bubba.
18:55OK, we'll put him on the...
18:57Oh, you can toss him to Josh.
18:58Throw it, is it going to crash? No.
19:00No, it's not going to smash, is it?
19:01Oh, my God!
19:02Oh!
19:03Oh!
19:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:07That, go on and cry over, Kevin!
19:10LAUGHTER
19:12CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:14Absolutely inspirational.
19:20LAUGHTER
19:21All right, so what do you guys think of the way
19:25that Trump spoke to the journalist this week?
19:27Um, I don't know.
19:28I just think people are saying that he accidentally...
19:30that he meant to say Peggy.
19:32I don't believe that,
19:33cos I don't think Trump knows a woman's name.
19:35I just don't think that's possible.
19:37Like, this is the man who married Ivanka
19:39and then had a daughter called Ivana.
19:40Yeah.
19:41Like, he's not big on details.
19:42Yeah.
19:43You know?
19:44I think he said,
19:45quiet piggy.
19:46And in his defence,
19:47we couldn't see how fat she was.
19:49LAUGHTER
19:50LAUGHTER
20:00I'm leaning in.
20:01I'm leaning in.
20:02LAUGHTER
20:03For the fat-phobic material.
20:05I'm going to be fat for about five more seconds
20:07and I'll never see it again, so...
20:09Look, it was a mixed week for Donald Trump.
20:11He spoke at a McDonald's conference earlier on in the week
20:14and revealed his favourite item on the menu.
20:16Check out the insightful clip.
20:18No matter who you are,
20:21everyone loves something at McDonald's.
20:24There's always something to have.
20:27I like the fish.
20:29I like it.
20:31LAUGHTER
20:32You could do a little bit more tartar sauce, please.
20:35LAUGHTER
20:36Seriously.
20:37LAUGHTER
20:38I hate when I say,
20:39do you have any tartar sauce...?
20:40Do you understand that?
20:41Yes, I have.
20:42He understands that.
20:43LAUGHTER
20:44The madness is,
20:45the geezer looks like a McNugget.
20:47LAUGHTER
20:48Do you know what?
20:49When they said they'd found a safer replacement for Greg Wallace,
20:52I think they fucked up.
20:53LAUGHTER
20:54What was the fish noise?
20:56LAUGHTER
20:57What was the...
20:58Can we...
20:59That was extraordinary...
21:00Can we hear the extraordinary fish noise again, please?
21:02The fish.
21:03The fish.
21:04The fish.
21:06My worry now is, what's he done with a fish?
21:09LAUGHTER
21:11If that's annoying...
21:13LAUGHTER
21:15Bubbles the fish.
21:17What's your food of choice at McDonald's, Harriet?
21:20Um, I love to order a quiet piggy.
21:22Um...
21:23LAUGHTER
21:24The fish is delicious if you add shredded lettuce, just saying.
21:29Is it?
21:30Yeah, really nice.
21:31Really nice.
21:32You've gone against everything we thought you were going to...
21:34LAUGHTER
21:35And football star Rinaldo also visited the White House this week.
21:38Oh, yes.
21:39Which then prompted Donald Trump to post this bizarre AI-generated clip.
21:43MUSIC
21:44MUSIC
21:45MUSIC
21:46MUSIC
21:47MUSIC
21:48MUSIC
21:49MUSIC
21:50MUSIC
21:51MUSIC
21:52MUSIC
21:54MUSIC
21:55MUSIC
21:56MUSIC
22:09DO YOU KNOW IF I'M WEIRD ABOUT THAT?
22:10NORMALLY, AI-LOOKS...
22:11people look less human.
22:16You know what?
22:18Mmm...
22:19Do you know, Trump's Mum's Scottish?
22:20Yep.
22:21You think what I'm thinking?
22:23McTominay and Trump together at the World Cup!
22:25LAUGHTER
22:26What a team!
22:27A, outward!
22:28Look, those clips didn't distract people
22:30from the way Trump spoke to journalists this week.
22:32In fact, more clips have surfaced of all the times
22:34Donald Trump has been disrespectful to women,
22:35and it's quite the pattern.
22:37pattern Donald Trump clearly has a problem with women and but this isn't
22:40just a problem for women to sort out we all need to be calling out men for this
22:44type of shit so if Trump was someone you worked with you'd have a quiet word do
22:49you know what I mean you take him to the pub you'd sit with him at the football
22:52and quietly suggest maybe you're not appropriately behaving towards women so
22:56I'm going to take Donald Trump to the shed for a quiet chat with the
22:58assistance of our guests and everyone's favorite DIY team handyman and little
23:02handyman all right Donald Donald mate look me and the lads have noticed the
23:16way you've been talking to women lately and we can't help but feel you're being
23:21a massive spanner yeah thank you honestly mate when you speak to a woman in a
23:26demeaning way you come across as kind of yes look I'm not the sharpest tool in
23:33the shed yeah but what you think is banter makes it sound like you've got a
23:38screw loose yeah yeah exactly for example it's never appropriate to call a woman a
23:43piggy or darling and especially not a how yeah when you talk to women like that
23:51everyone around you was thinking because you're actually normalizing
24:07misogyny every time you open your yes look I guess what I'm trying to say is
24:13that when you talk to women the way you do you just end up looking like
24:16a giant bag of festering manure we'll have more last week for you after the break as we take a deep breath and go into labour we'll see in a little bit
24:28we're joined by Harriet Kemsley and Katherine Ryan Laura messaged on whatsapp to say any chance you could ask my husband Michael to go get me another drink
24:46yeah Michael can you go get Laura another drink please all right in a bizarre crossover
24:58we're gonna need an update on that in the next part Laura we can't leave it there that kind of cliffhanger
25:07in a bizarre crossover of entertainment and education news this week a school in Dorset has banned the singing of songs from the Netflix series of the
25:13k-pop demon hunters because they're worried the songs don't fit with the school's Christian ethos
25:20this is a clip of one of the catchy demonic tunes
25:25that's so this doesn't it make you wish you had two feet to tap
25:46that's so good are you like my kids my kids haven't got into it Katherine are you across k-pop demon hunters are you happy you okay with them
25:56well I love all about Korea I love it all I think if you're gonna take the good you need to accept the bad I love them for their kimchi high-speed internet education and transport you know if you can't handle me at my k-pop you don't deserve me at my cosmetic surgery tourism
26:11would you ban the songs yeah I just think it's mad that like the Church of England is annoyed about they're worried that like demon hunters are gonna scar children yeah when they teach the concept of everlasting hell
26:26I just don't know if that makes sense and like demon hunters like destroy demons unlike yeah Christianity that just moves the demons to another parish
26:34moving on to international news now Stu said is it okay that the Russians are spying on us in the North Sea all week a Russian spy ship has allegedly been operating on the edge of UK waters on Wednesday it was accused of shining lasers at RAF pilots I mean we're assuming it's a spy ship it might be the Russian military having a stag do and playing laser quest
26:49if they've got laser pointers I can tell you exactly exactly what that means yeah I mean someone from the Russian military has gone over to Calais with their mum and dad also they've got us good because they know that our fighter pilots are cats
26:56all week a Russian spy ship has allegedly been operating on the edge of UK waters on Wednesday it was accused of shining lasers at RAF pilots I mean we're assuming it's a spy ship it might be the Russian military having a stag do and playing laser quest
27:08military has gone over to Calais with their mum and dad also they've got us good because they know
27:15that our fighter pilots are cats and their second plan is a huge ball of wool they're going to fire
27:23into the sea it does sound like a very childish way of conducting warfare what are you going to
27:26do next like knock on the door of the plane and then run away leave a steaming turd in the cockpit
27:31also how do you combat lasers being shown at planes i don't know what you're supposed to do
27:35apart from start playing rave music look meanwhile it was announced that the uk has become russia's
27:40number one enemy knocking the u.s out of top spot well done britain you're at the top of something
27:44how do we was that a sarcastic applause how do we feel about being russia's number one enemy
27:52not bothered no okay i don't care yeah no this is what we got to put teenage girls in charge this
27:58is classic high school triangulation you know i mean like first the u.s was number one now the u.s and
28:03russia are kind of friendly so it's us yeah we're not allowed to sit with them yes how's this the
28:09minister mean girls and us it is the russian minister for foreign affairs sergey lavrov said
28:13quote i do not know how the british will wash themselves clean of it although their ability
28:18to play the role of goose coming out of the shower is well known
28:21does anyone know what goose coming out of the shower means yeah it means there's a fucking goose in
28:31your house
28:32you've got to watch out because once they get in there it's hard to get them out
28:39trust me trust me on that it's only like donald trump alone with that goose we know where that's
28:44it's coming out of the shower sounds like a dvd extra from the movie top gun i checked by the
28:51way it means one top gun fan tom cruiser then it pays goose coming out of the shower is implies a
28:59perceived ability to constantly emerge clean from situations that would normally tarnish one's
29:03reputation apparently no one's worried about russia uh or you are we should we be worried about russia
29:09nah i don't genuinely don't you saw that ai that robot they had the other week the one that kept
29:13falling over yeah i think they're blaggers i think they're the world's greatest blaggers i think
29:18also the ones that you know that thing that you always thought it's like they're the ones that shout
29:22the loudest it's like in in the pub it's like never be wary of the one that's like shouting the most
29:26yeah it's always like the geezer behind that's like stood holding the bottle yeah i say that like
29:30someone who's had loads of like pub fights and lost um but no you know what i mean that's china
29:37you keep an eye on china china's the geezer holding the bottle listening to all our conversations
29:42okay um on to domestic politics now political analysis from me there
29:48if we're accepting goose in the shower we can accept geezer holding the bottle yeah
29:53yeah somewhere there's a russian comedy show and they're going what is a geezer in the bottle
30:00not christina aquilera's greatest
30:07um on to domestic politics now it's been an up and down week for labor
30:16exemplified by this painful clip of keir starmer tripping over at the g20 today
30:24hello
30:24uh what you didn't see was wes streeting just out of shot finishing off a banana
30:37and while the prime minister unveiled england's first ever men's health strategy this week
30:41uh abdul muhammad said is it okay that shabana mahmood's new immigration policy
30:45is celebrated by tommy robinson yeah so this week the home secretary announced the biggest overhaul of
30:49the asylum system since the second world war one change will be that some migrants will now have
30:54to wait 20 years rather than five if they want to settle in the uk mahmood was criticized by some
30:59labor supporters but was praised by both nigel farage and tommy robinson both of whom she said could
31:04sod off who are labor pleasing with these policies i'm so furious with them every single thing they do
31:11is wrong i'm just trying to find like a positive in these policies like all i can think is that
31:15duty-free is going to do well you know what i mean like toberones are going to
31:21katherine i'll tell you who they're not pleasing and that's people traffickers
31:26whoever thinks about the people traffickers that's what i'm thinking about right
31:32health secretary wes streeting said he wasn't comfortable with the possibility of children
31:36being separated from their families but he would back the policy anyway meanwhile a poll this week
31:41showed that nearly half of labor voters want keir starmer to step down do you think katherine do
31:46you think keir starmer's gonna uh last until the next election i don't think he's lasted this term
31:53he's a flaccid flaccid leader it's fun to call a man flaccid they really hate it yeah
31:59yeah yeah yeah and it went by me but i still felt it
32:10to be honest i'm glad you're feeling flaccid at this moment hills the other option's much worse
32:16that's why you'll be on the desk innit hey
32:21giddy up
32:22mp for norwich clive lewis said he'd give up his seat for andy burnham if he chose to run for
32:31prime minister on a bus or just generally just generally is andy burnham a pregnant woman look
32:37there is a lot going on in the labour party right now and we really want to get to the bottom of it
32:40so we're crossing now to the internet's favorite backbencher labour mp rosie holt who's joining us
32:46from westminster rosie thanks for joining us how do you feel about children being separated from their
32:50families
32:54right well i can see what you're doing there adam and i am against the separation of families from
33:00their children but what we're talking about here is the separation of families from their children
33:09sorry isn't that the same thing well crucially i think you're missing out on the context here
33:15and the context here is crucial and what's the context exactly exactly and that is why you should
33:24listen to us and not reform okay well some people are saying some of your policies are quite similar
33:30to those of reform how do you respond to that well i really take issue to that actually adam do we listen
33:38to reform no do we listen to the people who listen to reform absolutely do we agree with reform categorically
33:48not do we agree with the people who agree with reform yes yes we do actually because we believe
33:56in bringing people together um there's been talk of a challenge to keir starmer's leadership from west
34:01streeting is the prime minister's job in trouble well if you don't mind me saying adam i think
34:08people have been watching a few too many wicked trailers and and what you do have to remember is
34:13that alpha and glinda although they were fighting a lot they were in fact very good friends and if
34:19they can defy gravity so can the labor party all right final question then with labor flagging in
34:28the polls and the green party surging ahead would you ever consider a coalition in the future well i
34:34think you might have been listening a little too much to lily allen's latest album there adam but much
34:40like lily allen's latest album it's all well and good to be open but that can bring a lot of problems
34:48it can be uh messy it can be emotionally complex and there can be butt plugs
34:58sorry the metaphor got away from me there i've never used butt plugs
35:03rosie holt thank you so much for your time
35:11we'll have more last week for you after the break as the sports channel drops the ball and we unveil
35:15another mystery guest we'll see you in a little bit
35:33welcome back to last leg we're joined by harriet kensley and katherine ryan um laura said it worked
35:37uh uh and sent us this photo of her with the drink hey i think i can take it for no i can't all right
35:49grand all right you need to put your glasses on worst honestly my worst tv moment ever
35:59also you could have just said you'd taken it no one would have known i know do you know what you're
36:03right for cricket fans the ashes started this morning in australia craig said is it okay to
36:07ask if you'll be doing an ashes england versus australia bet like you do for the paralympics well i mean
36:13when i first woke up this morning and saw the english score i was like no chance but now actually
36:18yeah if you don't know england was shit and then australia was shitter
36:21um so i came up with an idea didn't i for a bet yes so how about if england win yeah you have to face
36:31an over of bowling from an ashes legend okay yeah and if australia win we have to okay full pace bowling
36:40and if it's a draw we all have to not to do that would be horrible to drag you into this i wouldn't know
36:47you don't know what you said um in more sports news this week sky sports had to or axe their tick
36:56tock channel halo which was created specifically for female sports fans uh the channel was accused
37:01of patronizing women starting with this insulting tweet uh in which they call themselves quote the
37:05lil sis of sky sports was that the right way to start no
37:12oh yeah yeah no i i what it felt like you know like a a sequel to 21 jump street and just an old
37:21undercover policeman has started working at sky sports they also posted this condescending clip of
37:27man in man city's erling harland in action with the title how the matcha and hot girl walk combo hits
37:34oh god it was hard to tell if it was a bunch of blokes behind it who have no idea what women want or a
37:38bunch of boomers who have no idea what tick tockers want what do you guys make well the execs i believe
37:44were men and they said that there was a largely female team behind the original idea so essentially
37:50the male execs blamed it on women which i think is catty as fuck you bitches but also if there was a team
38:00of male execs and there was a whole bunch of women giving advice right then i'm assuming the men didn't
38:05listen to them and just did their own shit anyway yeah yeah a man wrote that for sure sorry yeah
38:12no what no woman actually what what do you think it's difficult to know what works on the internet
38:17i mean if i was trying to appeal to teen women i might do the same like oh matcha get your girl
38:23gang on pink glitter i don't know would you have watched that channel it had sports in it i would not
38:29have but i think women would have warmed to it more if it had you know less patronizing and had
38:41more female content like five of the eleven videos were male sports anyway right it was like they were
38:46going we women want to watch male sports but they just don't have it presented to them the right way
38:50right that's what they were kind of saying instead of going maybe women want to watch women's sports
38:54or all sport anyway or no sport or no sport meanwhile this week samaritans research found that one in
38:59ten men fakes interest in sport there was a lot of stats from that they also found out that two in three
39:05men fake interest in the news once a week as well another i remember there was another stat one in
39:18ten uh one in three men fakes interest in the other two men so one in ten men fake an interest
39:27in sport what's more worrying about that is that there are 11 men in a football team does that mean
39:31like in every sporting crowd it's like meg ryan in when harry met sally there's just one guy faking
39:36it just going yes yes yes and there's a guy next to him going yep i'll support who he's supporting
39:41my phone's buzzing someone's ringing me someone's ringing you laura um harry have you have
39:48you ever faked an interest in anything yeah well i've been doing online dating um so yeah big time
39:54i just have to fake an interest in like what men like like bouldering and like deejaying and like
40:00talking yeah yeah if you want to see some good tiling mate that's the weirdest thing i've ever said
40:11all right i've tiled a ceiling on that note let's bring on this week's mystery guest
40:15not on that note surely katherine and harriet have to try to work out how this person relates
40:20to the news of the week can we have this week's mystery guest please
40:33josh alex who's the mystery guest okay this is james hello pleasure nice how are you hi hi nice to
40:40meet you nice to meet you do you like bouldering what this is james mcalpine and he wants to be
40:49future prime minister but what has he told the papers this week would be his first policy
40:55can we have the dramatic lighting change please
40:58is it a making the doors bigger in downing street b getting rid of the bottom shelf in supermarkets
41:09or c banning limbo dancing and it's next conservative pm isn't it yeah my man not next future you didn't
41:17want to say next oh future the next one future is kemi badenoch isn't it absolutely i hope so oh come on
41:24well good luck too i can really see you shattering glass ceilings
41:32that's the first i know you by the way you're famous on social media i've seen you stood next to
41:36other boys i'm sure oh thank you yeah it seems like a lot of your policies are very like you based
41:42me yeah it was like limbo hi no no only one of them's real oh sorry otherwise otherwise harriet
41:50there's no guessing game have a think about it over the break uh and we'll see who you think it is
41:58after the break we'll reveal the mystery guest josh will wrap up the last seven days and we'll unveil
42:02your choice for an angel on the top of the tree and we'll see you in a little bit
42:19welcome back to last leg we're told by harriet kensley and katherine ryan now before the break we
42:23challenged our guests to work out how this person is connected to the news can we have the options
42:27again please yes so jones been news because he wants to be future prime minister but is it what
42:33would his first policy be would it be to make the doors bigger in downing street to get rid of the
42:38bottom shelf in supermarkets or to ban limbo down sorry what do you think i just i don't know if you
42:45can make all doors bigger like that would be a lot just the downing street one oh okay i think a
42:53cheese are swept harriet sorry i know i'm meant to be behind here but come on mate i think a
42:59tori i think a conservative prime minister loves limbo because they can go low i think they're not
43:05worried about the bottom shelf of a supermarket because they're not connected to you know the
43:11everyday man they don't go there they have assistance so i think your first policy would
43:15definitely be to make the door and downing street bigger so you can walk on through and ruin everyone's
43:20lives is is that the correct answer it is so you've been spoken about this week as the tallest tori how
43:37tall are you seven two cool amazing can i ask what is that in rishis too many to count
43:45can i can i stand next to you come in do you just what i mean ophel look short next to me especially
43:53yourself
43:59james thank you so much and good luck with your future political career
44:15lovely there um josh has been tiling the ceiling in the last seven days there's been a lot of ag in
44:22the build up to the ashes yeah so monte panasar legendary english spinner had a go at steve smith the
44:28australian captain who then had a go back by saying that you shouldn't listen to monte panasar because
44:33he did very badly on celebrity mastermind right would you like to see monte panasar's worst answers
44:40and how it can go horribly wrong in this amazing clip yes please what is the title of the first volume
44:46of c.s lewis's chronicles of narnia to be published chronologically it follows the magician's nephew
44:51cj lewis the lion the witch and the wardrobe birds described as pelagic spend most of their lives
44:59flying over what sky the seed what is the title of a.a mill's staged adaptation of kenneth graham's
45:06children's novel the wind in the willows harry potter toad of toad hall wow um just briefly by the
45:14way i managed to work out how to take a photo of us during the ad break and i sent it to laura and then
45:18she sent back this photo of her and her husband he does not look happy that i've been sending his
45:23wife photos that is a geese who thought they were watching a film tonight we're about to end the show
45:35by placing your angel on our christmas tree but before we do would you please thank our guests harriet
45:40kemsley we'll be back next week with actor rose ailing ellis and comedians chris mccaslin and adam
45:54buxton but right now we are going to announce the winner of this year's last leg christmas angel
46:02in third place we have leader of the green party zach polanski in second place we have rugby legend joe
46:08marler but our 2025 christmas angel is sarah cox
46:18sarah couldn't be with us this evening but she has sent us this acceptance video hello it's my cake mate
46:24adam hills hi josh hi alex it's me sarah your fairy at the top of the tree i'm absolutely thrilled what an
46:33honor i'd like to apologize to the brilliant joe marler for being beaten in second place by a 50 year old
46:38woman i love you all merry christmas to your fantastic viewers and thanks for voting for me i'm dead
46:42she voted for me i'm dead sure
46:52i'm like she's like she's born to be she dreaming she came so far now we believe
47:02she's going up up up it's her moment top of the tree she'll be going gonna be gonna be golden oh
47:11up up up up up with our angel she came along from polton gonna be gonna be golden oh she's not trading
47:21Now she's waiting like she's born to be
47:26It's Christmas, I've had time to shine up
47:31On our Christmas tree
47:51On our Christmas tree
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