00:00My degree is just six months but now my parents have said that just finish your college.
00:06They're saying that it's now your age to marry and they're like just finish off your degree
00:09and then we will find someone for you. You said in one of your videos that close your eyes and
00:14identify if you had no fear then what would you be doing currently in your life and then just do
00:21that. So like there are many things which I want to explore for myself but I'm very very confused
00:25what to do. Do not just go with your random desires. Typically the fear remains and a lot of time
00:36and energy is spent on the desire and yet even the fulfillment of the desire fails to cover up
00:43further. I feel I lack in something and then to make up for that lack we want an object even if
00:54your want is fulfilled. It would still leave you unfulfilled and there is a great insecurity.
01:01What if I live all my life remaining incomplete? What if I die unfulfilled? We are told you should
01:07not desire too much. You can desire too much and that would still be all right if the desire is from
01:13you. So my question is you said in one of your videos that close your eyes and identify if you
01:25had no fear then what would you be doing currently in your life and then just do that. However in
01:31another video you also mentioned that do not do what you want because whatever you want comes from
01:38external influences and so whatever we want may be useless and not really meaningful. So what to
01:46follow? What our heart says or something which we are not interested in but it's meaningful? Sir
01:52because I'm in my CA final level and like I'm also interested in many extracurriculars like dancing
01:59in performing arts but I've never tried it. Like I'm good in dance and I also spend one hour a day to
02:08go to dance sessions but I'm currently living in Bhatanda in Punjab. So I did do jobs in Delhi and
02:15Gurgaon and in finance and accounts department and then I also worked for a startup in IB investment banking.
02:22After a point I've switched many jobs and put a gap in between and have tried multiple things
02:28but now my parents have said that just finish your college, finish off your degree and then you can
02:35do anything you want. Now as time is passing and I'm seeing that they're like they're saying that
02:41it's now your age to marry but my degree is just six months. I mean I'll get my final degree in six
02:49months and they're like just finish off your degree and then we will find someone for you. So like there
02:54are many things which I want to explore for myself but I'm very very confused what to do.
02:58This is before I start answering your particular question see this is what this this country does to
03:15women. You know the woman counts her days. She says let me do whatever can be done of life before marriage
03:30because after marriage all this exploration and discovery and adventure will anyway come to an end.
03:40men don't feel that way once they get married they won't be able to go out and seek things
04:00or explore or find doors closed. Okay. So you said the first thing I said was close your eyes
04:12without fear. Do what comes to you, right? That was the first statement
04:25that spoke of being without fear.
04:31fear. And the second one that you quoted talked of being without your desires. You said do not do
04:44what you want. Do not do. Do not just go with your random desires. The first one is talking of
04:56being without fear. And the second one is talking of being without the usual kind of desires. And if these
05:10two sentences are to agree with each other what would that need? Just equate these two sentences each other assuming
05:22that the speaker has some integrity. He won't be talking of two different things at two points. If two if these two
05:32if these two sentences are coming from the same center then these two will agree with each other no?
05:38And if you equate these two with each other what do you get?
05:42No fear is no desire. No fear is no desire. No fear is no desire.
05:46So fear equals desire. That's the key to understand.
05:52Typically, your desires are deeply related to your fears. First comes the fear and then comes the desire. And the desire
06:05is always a cover-up job on the fear. And that too a bad cover-up job. The fear remains and a lot of time and
06:21energy is spent on the desire and yet even the fulfillment of the desire fails to cover up for the fear.
06:30The fear still remains. Fear still remains. That's what we are probably missing on. We take fear as a negative thing.
06:43No, you should not have fear in life better. Equally we take desire as something to be pursued. Go chase your desires. Go get what you want. This is ignorance. You look at any desire that you have.
07:06That has arisen just as a blind reaction to an inner ignorance. I feel I lack in something and that's related to fear. When you lack in something then, oh my God, am I missing out on life? I lack in something. Fear.
07:29Fear. We feel we lack in something. And then to make up for that lack, we want an object. Today this object and tomorrow that one. That's desire. One does not desire for nothing. If you were totally alright with yourself, if you were very fulfilled within, would you still have these same desires that you currently have?
07:59No. No. So, all desires arise from a feeling of incompleteness. And there is a great insecurity. What if I live all my life remaining incomplete? What if I die unfulfilled? In fact, you would have heard these statements often.
08:24In fact, these are some of the same statements that scare mongers use to target women especially.
08:33The more you hear such warnings, the more you covet a darling husband.
08:53Even though you know what that fellow is probably going to bring to your life.
09:00Wanting. Wanting per se is neither good nor bad. But when you want from a point of ignorance, when you have never bothered to see that even if your want is fulfilled, it would still leave you unfulfilled.
09:29Then wanting is a problem. Nothing is always a problem. And everything is a problem from the wrong centre. Wanting from the wrong centre is a problem.
09:41You can also want from the wrong centre. You can have targets from the wrong centre. You can have targets from the right centre. You can run huge projects and international missions from the right centre.
10:00Forget small desires. You can have mammoth desires from the right centre and they would still be great.
10:07We are told you should not desire too much. You can desire too much. And that would still be alright if the desire is from the right centre.
10:17And even the feeblest desire from the centre of ignorance would not be right. Not be right for you. We are not talking in the moral sense here. We are talking in the utilitarian sense here. In the practical sense here.
10:39In the utilitarian sense here. It would still be right for you.
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