- 7 weeks ago
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00I take it this guy is my opponent.
00:03Hiya, my name's Love.
00:05We're getting married!
00:07I...
00:08Gotcha!
00:09If you truly insist,
00:12then I'll marry you.
00:15No way! I'm gonna live here!
00:18Hold on!
00:19My darling, I'm yours!
00:21What the...
00:23He has a big scythe.
00:31His job is guiding wandering souls
00:36into the circle of reincarnation.
00:42Come on, darling.
00:43Why don't we ditch this boring class and go have real fun?
00:47Muramoshi!
00:48This is not a bikini bar, dammit!
00:51Well, I sure as hell didn't bring her here!
00:53Married couples never spend a minute apart.
00:58I hate this so much!
01:00Why do they have to spite me all the time?
01:02You got him wrong!
01:03Enough of your excuses!
01:05Dare you treat earth women like yesterday's trash?
01:07You're a king of crap!
01:08Come here, darling.
01:09I'm so cute!
01:13Yo! You absolute scumbags!
01:15I'm forcing pure lumbags, I'll lose!
01:17You can shut the hell up!
01:18Are you morons blind or what?
01:21Oh, hey, Shinobu!
01:26Just calm down!
01:27You're just a bitch!
01:30Oh, no!
01:33Where did Muramoshi go?
01:35He's very under there.
01:37Hey, darling?
01:41Darling, please forgive me.
01:43Sure, yeah, whatever.
01:44All this crap is seriously ruining my life!
01:58Tell me why I can't help you!
02:17Oh
02:47Oh
03:17Oh
03:32Here's your order sir
03:42Oh
03:44I know it's cold out there
03:46So come home and let me warm you up
03:48Otaru, we won't give you a hard time, come home
03:51Oh Otaru, I had to attend a funeral a few days ago
03:55I made sure to bring home a bunch of those tasty funeral buns you love
03:59Many of his friends have also gathered here to share their concern
04:03Hey Otaru, please give me a call back
04:05I know for a fact that you don't want to go home to Lamp
04:08Damn it!
04:09They're already looking for me after I managed to slip away unnoticed
04:13Don't even bother trying to
04:15That's the photo, I can see exactly where you are, mister
04:18Damn it, damn it
04:19I don't even think that's the guy
04:21Take a look viewers, this is a photograph of Otaru Moroboshi
04:25Huh?
04:28Uh, excuse me sir?
04:29Great service
04:30Great service
04:37Whoops, my bad miss
04:39Sorry
04:40Hey, what's wrong with you lady?
04:44The shock of being bumped into has put strain on my heart
04:51My god, she sparked the fire in my soul
04:54Are you still feeling pain?
04:56Would a back massage help you out?
04:57Oh, uh, I know one
04:59If we remove your bra, it'll help with the strain
05:02Here, allow me
05:03You, you should stop being such a thoughtless sleazeball
05:07Perhaps your bad luck will turn around
05:09How did you know about that?
05:12It's called physionomy
05:13One luck revealed it
05:20I've been a shrine maiden for many years now
05:22But I've never met anyone as dreadfully cursed as you
05:26Oh yeah?
05:27So is that what you do?
05:28Well that explains the spiritual mumbo jumbo
05:31Listen, you have misfortune with women, right?
05:34I, uh
05:36Well, yes
05:37I'm seriously thinking of swearing them off
05:40My heart's back to go
05:41Oh, then let's get that bra
05:43You're just asking for trouble now
05:46Now, like I was about to tell you before
05:49Just stop
05:53You know, if I'm being honest to your lady
05:55You're sending a lot of mixed signals
05:57Fine then
05:58I'll perform an exorcism for you
06:02My immense spiritual power
06:04Shall put a quick end to this
06:17Mother! I'm back!
06:19Welcome home Sakura!
06:21So this chick's name is Sakura
06:25Hm?
06:26That voice, it sounds familiar
06:27Oh my! Do we have a gift?
06:29AHHHHH
06:31Something the matter?
06:33N-no!
06:34I-I just, uh...
06:36Gotta go, bye!
06:37Stop!
06:38Where do you think you're going?
06:39Hurry mother!
06:40Capture that boy!
06:42Don't run off and waste my generosity!
06:48Or they'll be held to pain
06:50Sakura never stops once she's put her mind to something
06:53She's always been in frail health
06:55But that hasn't held back her skills
06:57Your face is so cursed it could be the perfect image for unlucky
07:01Now you're in desperate need of an exorcism my boy
07:05This way!
07:08Just leave me alone!
07:10Relax, Sakura will take care of you
07:12No thanks!
07:13I'm gonna get you!
07:14I'M LEAVING!
07:15We're trying to do you a favour out of the kindness of our hearts
07:20Have a little gratitude
07:22What the?
07:23Sakura!
07:24What happened to you?
07:26It's just another jeep's
07:27I have a decayed tooth that has suddenly caused a canker sore
07:31AHHHHH
07:33AHHHHH
07:34AHHHHH
07:35Let's hurry so I can see a dead tooth
07:38Unclean spirits and infernal invaders
07:42We drive you from us
07:44Unclean spirits and infernal invaders
07:48We drive you from
07:50Don't you hurt!
07:53It hurts!
07:54Yikes!
07:55This lady!
07:56I can't focus because of all the goddamn thing right now!
08:00Such a powerful aura!
08:08What the hell?
08:10Hey!
08:11You're making things worse!
08:12Be quiet!
08:13They're very weak
08:14I'll blow them to smithereens with my spiritual power in no time
08:17Um
08:18Nishnash
08:19Yum yum
08:20Dim sum
08:21Chow mein
08:22Mappo
08:23Tofu
08:24Chili shrimp
08:25Ramen
08:26Wonton
08:27Boyan
08:28Poutine
08:29Extra garlic
08:30Sight of veggies
08:31Pork fat
08:32Soy sauce
08:33Low sodium
08:34Salt and pepper
08:35Extra local sodium
08:36This size
08:37Never unlimited
08:38Crap!
08:39It's no good!
08:40Now I have a migraine
08:41No matter!
08:42I can't afford to quit until the job is finished!
08:44These little freaks keep popping up every time you stop!
08:46Huh?
08:47No!
08:48They spelt the dishes!
08:49Oh you poor girl!
08:50I'm the one who can use some sympathy!
09:02What's the matter?
09:04I've been totally refreshed!
09:06For the first time ever!
09:07I feel so healthy!
09:08Then what about all these demons?
09:10They were the cause of my illness!
09:12I'm finally free from their curse!
09:14The demons ditched you to latch onto that boy instead!
09:17What a great turnout, Sakura!
09:19Thanks, mother!
09:20Wait a sec!
09:21Just a moment!
09:22I'll finish the exorcism for you!
09:24You damn well better!
09:26Do you like so many!
09:34Why?
09:36misses the Capodernary
09:38Demon Seacom
09:45Ugh!
09:47They're all going away!
09:48They're all going away!
09:49Oh, they're all going away.
10:02What the hell is that thing?
10:04It's the Grim Reaper.
10:10Rest in peace.
10:13So, you managed to get rid of all the demons that were causing her illness?
10:17You've always been worried about her, so I figured we should let you know right away, Cherry.
10:22What fantastic news, Sakura.
10:24Thanks a lot, dear Uncle.
10:26What a shame to be him, though.
10:28That boy is more unlucky than ever before, isn't he?
10:34Honoru, please don't die.
10:36Why? Why?
10:38Oh, Honoru, how could you abandon us like this?
10:43We wanted you back alive, you bonehead.
10:45Excuse me, the doctor would like to speak with you for a moment.
10:48Hello there. Think I can get your number before you leave?
10:55What's wrong with all of you? Pick your faces up off the floor.
10:59I don't even know why I bother anymore.
11:02How dare you!
11:03Darling, you're cheating on me again?
11:17There they go with the yelling again.
11:21They really need to do something about their son.
11:23What a dreadful boy.
11:25Darling, you're a jerk!
11:26Cherry, I need a favor.
11:34Oh, so you're asking me to strip Lum of her powers, huh?
11:38I can't go a single day without electrocution!
11:40And whenever I try to run away, she just flies after me!
11:43It freaking sucks!
11:45The best years of my life are going to be totally ruined!
11:48So that's how you feel about me, darling?
11:50Lum!
11:51You have some nerve treating me like the bad guy after you cheated on me!
11:55David, quit stalking me!
11:56Just where do you think you're going?
11:58Get away!
12:00I see where he's coming from.
12:03Anybody home?
12:04Coming!
12:07Oh, hello there.
12:08Good day, ma'am.
12:10Tell me, did Otaru croak?
12:12Funny you ask.
12:13He just came back home looking the worst I've ever seen him.
12:16Otaru!
12:16You have a guest!
12:19So you guys just talk shit behind my back, huh?
12:21What kind of mother acts like that?
12:23And I thought we were friends, bro!
12:25Ignore the dramatics.
12:26That boy has more than a few screws loose these days.
12:30So, what did you come to my house for?
12:32Oh, right.
12:33Cherry sent me over.
12:34He wanted me to give you this.
12:36Really?
12:39What's up with the yellow ribbon?
12:41Huh?
12:42Hmm?
12:43Dear Otaru,
12:44take the ribbon that I've included
12:47and tie it around Lum's horns.
12:49Only the person who ties it
12:51shall be able to remove it.
12:53It will block out her Oni powers.
12:56I made this ribbon especially for you!
13:00What are you two up to?
13:02Hey, Lum.
13:03Got a sec?
13:05Hey, what are you holding in your hand there?
13:07Well, it's something that Cherry...
13:09Cherry what?
13:11Don't worry about it.
13:13This thing is called a ribbon, see?
13:15It's an accessory that girls on Earth wear to look cute.
13:19Would you care to give this thing a try?
13:22Darling, your voice is cracking for some reason.
13:25Oh, uh, that!
13:26It's just because the thought of seeing you with the ribbon on
13:28gets me all flustered.
13:29Ribbons are pretty lame, though.
13:30Don't you think?
13:31Ah, you're trapped!
13:32Seeing your wife get dolled up
13:34is the joy of every husband out there!
13:36Ah!
13:36My heart aches for a glance of my wife in this!
13:39Oh, is that true?
13:41Let me tie it on for you, okay?
13:43Okay!
13:46And it's done!
13:51Take a look, Lum.
13:52Oh?
13:55Oh?
13:55I admit, they do look good on her.
14:01That's not the important part.
14:02I'm free now.
14:04I really love it!
14:05I'm gonna go out for a bit and show these off!
14:10Huh?
14:17That hurt!
14:18Thalem!
14:19Are you alright?
14:20It worked!
14:21What's going on?
14:31My body's heavy!
14:35Do you care to explain why we're stalking her?
14:37No real reason.
14:39Oh!
14:40Hi, Lum!
14:41What are you doing out here?
14:46Is everything alright, Lum?
14:49You're staring at me awfully hard and, um...
14:51Lum!
15:02Let me just...
15:03Grab my freaking hand!
15:05I can't use my electric shock.
15:08Lum, my dear!
15:09The truth is, when I first saw you, I knew you were to go from...
15:12Keep it in your pants, dumbass!
15:15What the hell?
15:16Damn it!
15:16And where did you come from?
15:18Don't go all crazy over hand-holding!
15:19And how the hell did you expect me to react to that?
15:22Come on!
15:23Maybe I should try again.
15:24You can't do the whole time someone's held your hand before!
15:26Oh, Lum, my beloved!
15:28Just forget this loser!
15:30Let's go have...
15:31Ah!
15:31Dumbass!
15:32Is there a problem, Lum?
15:33Something seems off.
15:34Why not just shock those two idiots already?
15:36Hey, darling.
15:37It's just...
15:38I think I may have gotten sick.
15:40You what?
15:41Seriously?
15:41Ah, my body's heavy and I can't fly anymore!
15:45My electricity isn't working either!
15:49Oh, Shinobu!
15:51Get a room.
15:52No one wants to see you two like that.
15:54It's gross.
15:55Just butt out!
15:56This is what married couples look like!
15:58Right?
15:59Tell her, darling.
16:01My amazing husband even gave me these really cute ribbons!
16:05I bet you're jealous!
16:06Ataru, you did?
16:08I can confirm.
16:09Ataru even said he wanted to see his wife dolled up.
16:12Don't say that, you backstabber!
16:15Meanwhile, he's never bothered to give me a single bobby pin!
16:19Screw you and your stupid ribbons!
16:23Did you just...
16:25cover for Lum?
16:26Cut it out!
16:26Come on!
16:30I came here to give you some treats that I baked earlier today.
16:34But forget it.
16:35You clearly don't care.
16:37Shinobu!
16:38Listen, I have a good reason!
16:43Hmm?
16:43What are you trying to say, darling?
16:45Never mind.
16:46It's silly.
16:50We're crashing here to ensure Lum stays safe!
16:53Since she can't protect herself, leaving her alone with you is a recipe for trouble.
16:57The way you ogle her is way more problematic!
16:59Darling, just how long are these guys going to stay?
17:02That's enough.
17:04Make space.
17:05Ataru transforms into a full-on sex beast during the night.
17:08I'm not some kind of werewolf, damn it!
17:11Tough shit.
17:12You won't lay a finger on Lum tonight.
17:14Help me, darling!
17:16Hurry and send these guys packing!
17:17Hey!
17:18Hey!
17:19Bozos!
17:21Get the hell out!
17:26And don't come back!
17:28This won't stop us!
17:29We'll keep watching you from here!
17:30Yeah, sir!
17:31Good luck with that!
17:33Bastard!
17:34Oh, darling, this makes me so happy!
17:37You're usually so cold, but I knew it!
17:40You fought for me when the chips were down!
17:44Darling, let's go to bed.
17:46We're sleeping together.
17:49Being unable to fly has me feeling pretty blue,
17:52so I don't want us to be a part if that's okay.
17:55Darling, I'll stay by your side for life!
18:01For life!
18:02I mean, I can't go back to my spaceship anyway,
18:06so I'll have to make myself at home here!
18:09That's it!
18:09Take the ribbons off!
18:11Huh?
18:11I don't wanna!
18:13They're special, since they're the first gift that you've ever given me!
18:16Whatever!
18:16Just take it off!
18:18No!
18:18Stop!
18:19Get down!
18:21Lum needs help!
18:22Come back!
18:25Hold it!
18:26What do you think you're doing?
18:28Quit fighting, Taks!
18:30Come here!
18:30You pervert!
18:34Keep your filthy hands off, Wonk!
18:36Do you hear me?
18:37What do you mean?
18:38Don't play dumb with us!
18:39We know exactly what's going on!
18:41Get out!
18:42It's you two!
18:44You're the only purse here!
18:48Hey!
18:49Stop throwing my crap!
18:50My darling loves and cherishes me more than anyone!
18:58Hey, what's this?
19:01Oh, it's a letter from Cherry.
19:03Hey, don't read it!
19:04Let's see.
19:05This ribbon will block her Oni powers.
19:08Bastard!
19:09You and Cherry were in cahoots!
19:10Huh?
19:12Is that so?
19:14Okay, hear me out.
19:16It's not what you think!
19:18How could you just do something like that?
19:22Let's have a calm down.
19:24I can explain this.
19:25So you want to play with my feelings, huh?
19:27Whoa, she's a real powerhouse.
19:34The electric shock's almost so cute compared to that.
19:37Hurry up!
19:37Take the ribbons off me now!
19:39I would if I could!
19:40I was just trying to do that!
19:48It's been a hot minute since I gave you a good shock, darling!
19:51And I've got plenty of energy to bear!
19:54Oh, God!
19:55Please don't!
19:56Once I'm done with you, I'm going to make sure Cherry gets his just desserts, too!
20:00Hold on!
20:00You can at least go see Cherry first!
20:13I can sense that a great disturbance is headed this way.
20:16Stop!
20:17I'm going to save me!
20:21I think it's for the best I stay at Sakura's house this evening.
20:24Who's happening?
20:25Who's happening?
20:26Who's happening?
20:26Who's happening?
20:26I don't know!
20:28No, I can't!
20:29I don't know!
20:30I don't know!
21:00I'm not sure what I'm thinking
21:02I'm not sure what I'm thinking
21:04I'm just thinking
21:06The rain is rising
21:08The sun is rising
21:10I'm going to be the one who's going to be
21:12Who will be the one?
21:14The foundation is for all this time
21:16Not just for this
21:18But the whole world is not
21:20No matter how long
21:22The only one is coming
21:24You can't go
21:26You can't go
21:28ランジャナイラインは東京シャンディランネブー
21:33その時が来たってどうにもなんないぜ
21:36曖昧な本当なんてメランコリーかするだけ
21:40私を逆さらって今 take on me
21:43いやいやいや東京シャンディランネブー
21:46その時が来たってどうにもなんないぜ
21:50曖昧な本当なんてメランコリーかするだけ
21:54私を逆さらって今 take on me
21:57Are you absolutely certain that you'll be okay on your own, Shotaro?
22:13Indeed, Grandfather.
22:15I shall lay my life on the line to study hard.
22:18I will not bring dishonor to the family crest.
22:27Have a nice day, young master.
22:33Thank you, you too.
22:35Please be careful.
22:37Right.
22:40I shall return back soon!
22:43Bye!
22:45Next time on Urusei Yatsura.
22:47Why, you cheeky little!
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