- 16 minutes ago
Steve Kazee Interview
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00:00Let's talk about Family Man. You're a parenting tool ambassador. So what exactly does that mean?
00:06Well, for me, it was really exciting. You know, they actually reached out to me. I've been a fan
00:09of Movember for a while. I just, you know, growing up where I did, there wasn't much emphasis on
00:15health care in general, but definitely not a lot of emphasis on male specific health care.
00:23So I was a big fan of Movember from the start. I just thought it was a great idea to open up
00:28the conversation around men's health a little bit more, you know, more transparent than I think it
00:34had been for generations. And so when they reached out to me about being a part of it, I was, I was
00:40already in, but then when they told me the specifics of what they were doing, I was even more so excited
00:45about it because having just become a father almost a year ago and having been sort of gifted a, you
00:54know, a daughter from a previous marriage and sort of already feeling like a stepfather to her. I've
01:00been in her life now for three years. And so I just was like, I jumped at the opportunity to like,
01:06be a part of something that was addressing the conversation around men and fatherhood because
01:12it's such a complex, complex problem. And I think that the way that they're sort of face forward
01:20confronting it is a, is a really smart way to do in, in these sort of like digital times that we live
01:25in. Yeah. And, you know, talk to me about how you guys are handling parenting during this pandemic.
01:33So, oh man, I remember we were laying in bed sometime right around the end of December and
01:41I'm a bit of a news hound. And so I, I read a lot of different like news publications from around
01:46the world to just know what's happening. And I rolled over to Jenna and I said, you know,
01:53there's this like pneumonia, like flu thing happening in China and like, sounds bad. And,
01:59you know, the next couple of days, it was like a slow triple started coming. And I, I, you know,
02:03we had at that point, we were seven months pregnant. So we had our baby boy, uh, March the 6th.
02:11And at that point it was already here. I think, I even think someone had died at that point.
02:15Um, and when we were at the hospital, they were very cautious, but no one was like overly
02:21concerned. You know, they were just cautious. Um, but by the time we got home, uh, two days after
02:27he was born, it was pretty clear where we were headed. And then that following Friday, a week
02:31later, we went into lockdown. And so, you know, you prep all you want about becoming a new parent
02:37and having a newborn. And on day one, it just all went out the window because it was just a whole
02:43new world that we were living in. So, you know, there are parts of me that feels like I feel,
02:49you know, that we've got a little robbed in, in our, uh, my first like baby. Um, but you know,
02:57under the circumstances, we're just so thankful to have our health and, uh, we've lost family members
03:02and friends to COVID. And, you know, it really was challenging to then shift into parenting in the
03:09face of all of that. And while also trying to, you know, um, stay alive ourselves and keep our,
03:16our, our children alive. And then you add into that, you know, caring for a seven-year-old
03:22throughout this is also been very difficult. You know, I mean, she was six at the time and
03:27turned seven in the middle of it. And, you know, it's, it's really hard on the kids. It is very,
03:32very hard on the kids. And she's been a champion. I mean, she has been as good as any kid you could
03:38have imagined. Callum has no idea. He, you know, he has literally no idea what's happening. He,
03:44all he knows is he gets mom and dad and sister 24 seven and he's like thrilled about it. So
03:49it's been challenging though. Definitely. Yeah. And, you know, shifting gears just a little bit
03:57though, like what being a father and being a new father is really exciting. So what's been the funniest
04:02moment that you can share so far? I mean, it's so hard to pick one, you know, he is,
04:08he is a ball of just peace and light. He has been that way from the beginning. He wakes up with a
04:17smile on his face. He goes to bed with a smile on his face. We haven't had any of the, like,
04:22you know, the stereotypical problems that you have with a baby crying nights and fussiness. And,
04:27you know, he's just been really an angelic child with like a really good sense of humor already.
04:33Like he definitely, I'm afraid he's going to be a performer because he definitely like knows how to
04:39get a reaction from people. And he's just a little, like, he's just a little charmer. So it's,
04:44it's hard to pick one moment with him. I think, you know, my favorite thing about him at this point
04:50is that he started to learn the names of everyone in the house, including the dogs.
04:54Um, so you can basically call for a dog and he'll look at the specific, we have four. So he's look
04:59at the specific dog and to just watch him start to blossom. Really. He's started to walk now. It's
05:05like a whole new world. It's a whole new world. So, um, but like everything, I don't know, everything,
05:12there's literally not a bad thing. It's all amazing. It's all amazing. And how'd you pick his name?
05:20So Callum was chosen because we, uh, the, where we were living prior to this, uh, when we actually
05:28got pregnant, um, we had had a, a dove, uh, who had built a nest outside of our house, like two or
05:36three times over the course that we had lived there. And so we always had baby doves, uh, outside
05:42of our window and we could watch them and look into the nest. And, you know, we did a little bit
05:47of research into, you know, Jenna is very much into like spirituality and, um, you know,
05:52meanings. And so she looked into like what doves mean and they're a sign of not only peace, but
05:58they're also a sign of like fertility and, and new life and, uh, you know, reproduction. And so
06:04when we got pregnant, you know, we kind of like joked about how it was the doves, you know, and like
06:10we should have known cause the doves just kept coming and saying, this was a great place to have
06:14babies. Um, and so when we were searching for names, we found Callum and we really liked
06:20it. Uh, and when we looked at the meaning and the meaning is dove. And so we just were
06:25like, well, this has to be his name. Um, but it was hard, you know, we didn't, we were like
06:30in the hospital still weren't a hundred percent sure what we were going to do. And, uh, you
06:35know, they give you the old, like, well, you'll have to come back if you don't decide now.
06:39And so we really sat down and like, kind of like pressurized the situation. And, uh, I
06:44knew we wanted to have him have a part of my name. So he has my middle name, which is
06:48Michael. And then, uh, in a tribute to my mom, he has a second middle name, which is
06:53rebel. Uh, her name was Reba, but her nickname was rebel growing up. So that's how he became
06:59Callum, Michael rebel cause he, and so we're still trying to figure out which one he's going
07:03to be. He's got a little bit of rebel for sure. A little bit of like the chill Michael and
07:07then the very peaceful Callum. So, you know, and now that he is almost one, have you guys
07:15started talking about more kids yet? Did Jenna talk to you? She texted me right before the
07:23night. Um, we, you know, yeah, we've talked about it. We've talked about it specifically
07:30because, um, this, this sort of situation that we're in, you know, we don't know when life
07:36we'll get back to the hustle and the bustle and we have all this time right now. And it has been
07:41really wonderful to, to have this much time with your children in spite of the situation,
07:49you know, um, it's been the real blessing for us and the real sort of silver lining of all of this.
07:55And so we've talked about it. Um, but that's about as far as it's gotten at this point. You
07:59know, I don't know. I have, I have a lot of different feelings. I want a lot of kids. Um,
08:04but at the same time, you know, I worry a lot about the world at the moment where we
08:07are and, you know, there's a certain responsibility. I think you have to take into consideration
08:12before you just, you know, Oh, I want kids. Well, let's just have more kids. So definitely
08:17a conversation.
08:18A conversation to be had. Um, you know, talk to me a little bit about how it's like a
08:26couple, you guys have navigated the pandemic because a lot of people have found it's helped
08:30their relationships. Some people have found that they've been fighting more. Like how has it
08:34been on your guys' relationship?
08:36We are doing actually really well. You know, um, we, it's funny because I definitely think
08:45this time must be make or break for a lot of people. You know, um, it really, it forces
08:51every true color out of you because the situation is so sort of, you know, I mean, it's, it is
08:59life and death in a lot of ways, you know, I mean, you can't, you can't, it's not an overestimation
09:03to say that like, we are dealing with a very sort of traumatic grief stricken moment in our
09:09lives. And, you know, I think if you don't have that sort of foundation, which is mutual
09:15respect, compassion, love, and understanding, like you're not going to survive this time because
09:24she is seeing me at my worst and I am seeing her at her worst because we don't have any
09:30other way to be where we're, our bandwidth is so low for like how to just like cover and
09:36be okay that you're just sort of a raw nerve at all times. And one thing that I think we've
09:42been very good at is being a strong foundation and allowing that person, whoever it is, myself
09:49or her, or even our kids to just have bad days and to struggle and to be angry and to
09:55be upset and to be frustrated and sad and feel guilty and feel remorse. And, you know, there's
10:02no sort of limit in this household on what is okay to feel, you know? And so I think that
10:09has, has helped us. I mean, we've had, you know, we've definitely had, uh, you know, challenging
10:14moments. We've had arguments and we've had some really beautiful moments. And, uh, I
10:19think the way that we repair is always what is like really crucial because you're going
10:24to have, you're going to have tears, you know, you're going to have moments where things fall
10:30apart and it's about how you repair that is what is really crucial. And we do that really
10:34well, I think.
10:35Definitely. Um, you know, you've also talked about losing weight during this pandemic. A lot
10:41of people have gained it. You've lost it. So how much are you down and how is Jenna encouraged?
10:46Well, I've actually gone the whole, I gained it, lost it, gained some back and lost it again.
10:52So it's been a, it's been a year for me. Um, you know, I gained all the sort of normal
10:58nesting weight that you, I think people do gain. Um, and like, you know, I want to, like,
11:05this is always very cautious about talking about this because it's not so much for me about
11:10losing weight as it was about being healthy. Like I'm not, I'm not crazy about like what my weight
11:15is, but I know, I know where I feel my healthiest. And so I was really striving to get back to like
11:21my healthiest place. Um, because I have my whole life had a very complicated relationship with food.
11:27You know, I've used it the wrong ways for many years. Um, and so at the beginning of all this,
11:34I think I was like, you know, maybe 210 pounds. And then before I knew it, I was like 230 and that's
11:43not healthy for me. Um, that's, you know, that's high cholesterol. That's like bad land. So I really
11:50focused, you know, you're, it's like, once the pandemic hit, it's like, we're ordering, you know,
11:55like the worst kind of comfort food because you're just doing anything to feel okay. You know?
12:00So, and you don't have time to work out. You don't have, you don't have a gym. Gyms are not open. So
12:06I really made a conscious effort to just change the psychology of like why I eat the way I do and
12:13how I eat when I eat. And so I've managed to basically lose all of that unhealthy weight and
12:22some of the early baby weight. And then finally have gotten myself to a place where I feel really
12:27healthy and very happy. And Jenna is a wonderful partner because she eats like, I mean, like a bird,
12:35you know, she has like the healthiest, most natural diet in the world. You know, there's like
12:39salads aplenty around here and fruits and vegetables and like all the good staples. So Jenna is
12:46incredible. She keeps me very, very, very sane and healthy. Um, you know, I was born in the South
12:52where like convenience store food is a, is a luxury. So I don't have the best, the best habits when it
12:59comes to food. So luckily I've heard a balance me out. Um, a lot of people forget that you guys are
13:05engaged and not married. So of course, is there any plans to get married anytime soon? Well, maybe we did
13:10already. Nobody knows. I don't know. Um, no, we, you know, Oh God, it's like, it's so hard to even
13:19think about a wedding right now. You know, um, I, I, I hate to be in a sound like a cliche, but like
13:27everything really changed once, once COVID hit, you know, um, it's hard to feel celebratory at the
13:34time. And it's, and it's hard to feel like, you know, we want to be celebrating our lives and this,
13:40you know, it just feels like the wrong time. And for us, there's no difference between where we are
13:47right now and where we would be the day after a wedding ceremony. So there's no hurry. There's
13:52no rush for us. Um, it's, I think it's something we both very much want, but when the time is right,
13:59you know, the world has just been, it's just been too much lately to, to, you know, feel like, uh,
14:07celebrating on that level, you know? So, so nothing at the moment, but I'm sure at some point.
14:14And where can people learn more about the funniest dad or the, the parenting tool for
14:21what was it called? Movember parenting? Yeah. The, the family man. Yeah. Family man. Where can
14:27people learn, learn more? And also what does it mean to you to be a family man? I guess that's a
14:32good question. Honestly, I'm still learning that truthfully. Um, you know, it's so, it's so
14:40complicated. It's you, you hear about it. You, people tell you, you don't know your life will
14:45change so much once you have kids, but there's no way to actually quantify that data until you're
14:50in it until you have this, when they hand you this thing at the hospital two days after it came into
14:57the world and they're like, okay, see ya. And you're just like, what, what does it mean? Yeah. So you,
15:04you, a whole new part of your animal essence opens up because you, you are, you start relying
15:11on instinct, you know? And I think a lot of times my personal opinion is that one thing that probably
15:19throws people off in parenting is that they try to rely on everybody else's information to do the
15:26right thing. And it's such a personalized experience that that's hard to do, which is why I think what
15:31Movember is doing is so unique in the sense that like, it's curating a lot of personal experiences
15:37in order to like compile them into a useful set of knowledge for people. Cause there's just not
15:44much communication. I know when I was looking around, like, you know, how, how to be a dad,
15:50it's just a bunch of like generic books that, you know, don't really, they don't really reach into,
15:56I think what men need, which is a little bit more of a safe place to have an open
16:01conversation about the ups and the downs, you know, it's, there's highs and lows. There are
16:06days where you're more frustrated than you've ever been in your life. And then there are days where
16:10you're happier than you've ever been in your life. There's days where you're filled with more fear
16:13than you've ever been filled with in your life. And, you know, so for me, uh, that is what is so
16:22crucial, uh, for, you know, learning to be a father is just really sort of accepting that all
16:31experiences are valid, you know, there's no right way. And so you just have to trust yourself and trust
16:38your kid. I mean, that's the thing. They literally give everything that you need. All the information
16:43is right in front of you. It's not in a book, you know, it's right there. And so I think what
16:49Movember is doing by sort of tying that into, you know, real tangible knowledge, uh, it's going to
16:57help a lot of men moving forward for sure. Very good. It was a pleasure talking to you.
17:03Thank you so much. Yeah. Thank you so much for having me.
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