- 2 days ago
Figgy’s Mixtape brings the wild: Target bamboozling Black Friday shoppers, a Waymo rolling right through a police standoff, and more.
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00pass the aux cord and crank up the volume figgy figs in the driver's seat sit back relax and
00:09enjoy the ride it's time for figgy's mixtape on sports radio 610 yes it is the mixtape in the
00:17loop sports radio 16 it's your man figgy fig holding it down on a tuesday happy tuesday to
00:24everyone out there did you guys do any black friday shopping um last week just on amazon
00:31i actually did yeah and what's funny it's happened the last three years and it's never intentional
00:35it's just i'm hanging out with my mom and she's like oh man i need to pick something up let's go
00:40and then we end up going and shopping she's a mom she just yeah well let's check this out let's go
00:46see if you just look and see if you find anything y'all get some good deals and all that oh yeah
00:49and and i did the cyber monday too okay what'd you get uh is that blowing up your spot too much no
00:56no no no a couple of gifts and uh yeah nothing nothing too too too crazy okay are they for us
01:02no in a word no reggie said are they for us so um i don't know if you uh guys went to target or
01:14anything but target was doing something there they actually announced this ahead of time that they
01:20were giving out some swag bags for black friday and they hyped this up a lot to the point people
01:26were lining up outside the target 6 a.m it was hundreds of people outside the target super excited
01:33about this and they actually got the internet going nuts it was trending but it was trending for all
01:38the wrong reasons target is trending today but not for the reasons they hoped their big black friday
01:43swag bag giveaway was supposed to be fun and instead it's the internet's latest roast a viral
01:49video with her two million views shows shoppers opening their bags and the excitement quickly
01:53turns to oh target count your days because you have some nerve what for many their swag bag included a
02:00pack of uno cards lip gloss and a small pack of candy partly the big ticket prizes target promised
02:06leaving customers to say if they cared about our business that bag would have been half full
02:10so they're just complaining because it wasn't they waited outside 6 a.m for this bag thing which is
02:18oh i think that's always a red flag when you're sitting out there yeah you know excited about some
02:23type of bag that you don't know what the hell you're gonna get that's exactly that's the risk you take
02:27yeah but she said that they like advertise it sounds like they were like yo there could be all sorts of
02:33things in this bag and i wonder like what kind of things they said could be in there i think they thought
02:38like implying like as far as like ninja stuff like more expensive stuff yeah yeah you say ninja like
02:44the like air fryers and yeah yeah that type of stuff but it was just some uno cards some lip gloss
02:50some lip gloss i think somebody had like a little traveler lotion yeah just it was they couldn't even
02:56put the full-size lotion in there nope they say you get travel size we've all have figgy had an old
03:02guy moment earlier i'm gonna have an old guy but now number one it's the risk you take number two
03:07just be just appreciate what you got man back in my day we didn't appreciate what you got get but see
03:13we didn't use lip gloss we rubbed dirt on our lips see i feel like that was for the women yeah i feel
03:19like the lip gloss he's like men don't use lip gloss jam rub some dirt on them lips don't use no lip
03:25gloss i feel like you don't want that i like that's what you know yes i really don't yeah i i
03:30actually the only issue i have with this is the advertising and just waiting 6 a.m for this if it
03:38was like me just walking into target and they say hey here you go oh okay cool thanks yeah i wouldn't
03:44of course i wouldn't complain about it but again that's the risk you take yeah no no you don't know
03:48yeah yeah no i agree i'm with reggie if they said hey you could have this you know toaster or this
03:55air fryer and they only give out one in the entire country well then that's wrong but if
04:00they didn't say i mean yeah hey yeah you get what you get yeah yeah this was this was kind of i feel
04:07like this was kind of a rough layout i don't think the payoff for target doing this i don't think this
04:11was a good payoff yeah for doing all of this they could at least had maybe the first 10 people get a
04:17ninja or something yeah yeah i love there's someone was like ninja like swords and stars i like the way
04:22you think actually i like the way you think but i also don't like the way you think yeah because
04:27i'm afraid of what i would have waited in line for that that's right that's good stuff
04:31all right it's the mixtape in loot sports radio 610 have you guys ran across the uh the waymo car
04:41yeah yeah but everyone i've seen in houston and maybe they're just not ready yet has had an actual
04:45driver or at least somebody's sitting there okay yeah because i think they rolling the uh the driverless
04:51waymo cars in houston i want to say next year okay but uh austin i believe i think they got a
04:57whole bunch of them and i'm not gonna lie there's something within me that wants to be a chaos like
05:02causer like i want to be the person that helps make it so that waymo car just gets stuck somewhere
05:06you know what i mean like a kind of way they have been getting stuck they've been in some
05:09crazy situations yeah so um what does that say about me i feel like i'm a bad everybody's got that
05:15you're a bad person you want bad stuff to happen to people i like to do bad things with my
05:19friends yeah you remember that yeah excellent so uh apparently way back apparently waymo is doing
05:28little tours in la and they decided to drive right through a police standoff on this oh well decided
05:36might not be a good word yeah yeah so uh just in the picture um it was just imagine the helicopter
05:43flying around you got the police cars and the police got the guy on the ground the guys on the
05:50ground face down on the fake oh really yeah they're probably pointing at him yeah they're probably
05:56drawn on it yep and then a way more car just taking his own route just minding his did he order it
06:02because that would have been a little bit of heavy play you know i mean he did not order it matter of
06:05fact if you watch the video it looked like he's looking at the car like what is going what in the
06:10world see that's you need you need to be quick on your feet i'd have hopped in a waymo car man we
06:14out of there baby yeah take a nice little tour to look at this police standoff a slow speed waymo
06:20chase yeah here is uh somebody actually recorded a little video um i guess they were watching the
06:27standoff and they just saw this car they started recording the waymo car riding right through it
06:32fucking waymo oh my god oh my god what the is that waymo doing
06:41you can hear the cops yeah he just went through the the intersection made a nice little left of
06:51course like hey i'm just minding my business now now did the did the automated car did it follow all
06:56the rules of the road that's all i'm asking oh for sure it did oh yeah 100 i'm sure they saw the
07:01cops right there yeah so it's so funny you know you program these things and they have all the
07:07electronics and everything and doing this job just like it's just a glorified uh rumba that's all it
07:12is but it's the thing it's the one thing that you don't necessarily think about when you're
07:15programming it like one of a many what if something happened yeah one of many what if something happens
07:20right in front of it like i don't know a police standoff he'll just go yeah hey it's just like
07:24nick hailey doing his job i'm just doing my job i'm just doing my job man i i'm not making any
07:30adjustments and all that stuff i'm just doing my job that's all i'm not worried about anybody else
07:35and the poor passengers in the did it have passengers oh i hadn't even yeah because you
07:41can't do nothing about that yeah it had passengers yeah so uh just a little side note a rep for way
07:47motels tmz that the vehicle cleared the scene in a matter of seconds and the passengers inside made
07:53it safely to their destiny they better yeah yeah just imagine being there like holy
07:58believe they're right going right by some dude face down on the pavement i'll be a little embarrassed
08:03when i'm riding past a cop that got somebody in hand because i'm like uh-oh should i ride past here
08:08well you said the guns were drawn i'd have been i'd have been down in them seats like the guy with
08:14his face was on the concrete with his hands up outside the car going yeah man and i'm just i'm just
08:20here trying to get to wherever i'm trying to go in the back seat of the car and i can't tell the car
08:25will take a different route i'm just going between i'm going in front of uh drawn drawn weapons no no
08:30no no no no i'm being dead serious here i'd give him a five-star review why it's just awesome
08:36i mean you come out of it fine this man is like on it's a wonderful world at disney except it's a
08:42waymo through a police i mean think about that we drove through an active police scene
08:47and and we're not hurt i wouldn't give him a one star unless unless you know i'm just i'm just
08:53you know it's a computer right john no but you still get ratings but i was like you sound like
08:58hey great job waymo like no man that's a five-star review right there i'm just glad it wasn't like
09:03so after to the point the guy got got a gun behind the car yeah bullets flying yeah just imagine
09:10that was going on that might be a one star oh i'm in that car with the head cover my brain my
09:16brain went into like action movie where i was like could that been the time where he gets up and
09:20he like walks a lot alongside the waymo so you get the effect of like oh yeah oh he's gone where did
09:25he go hiding behind the car man cops start shooting
09:30it's the mid-state been loose sports radio 16 lopez you're the only person here that got kids
09:40and what just completely random what is the craziest order your wife had oh the cravings yeah the cravings
09:50i remember it distinctly because she she made it probably four or five times over the course of her
09:55pregnancy and keep in mind i don't remember her really eating either of these things since our
10:02last baby was born a wendy's uh not shake what are they called the uh i was about to call it not a
10:09flurry the wendy's uh frosty frosty i'm sorry i just wanted a frosty a wendy's frosty and cheetos
10:16together together every time every single time that sounds like something you can only eat in two states
10:24and i don't pregnant or high yes and i don't think she's had either of those jack in the box
10:30looking like since and it was always can you go to wendy's oh and stop and get some cheetos okay
10:38let me know what you think of this order so a guy um posted about his pregnant wife um he said uh
10:48this was her order so he she sent him to get a pizza and this was the pizza order
10:54triple pepperoni triple pepperoni all right hey we just getting started man not even double
11:02triple triple i didn't even know that was i used to be i usually get double but i know triple was
11:08an option yeah uh extra cheese okay fair banana peppers sure light jalapeno okay all this seems
11:17very reasonable half chicken oh man half chicken half pepper triple pepperoni yeah half mushroom
11:23the other half or the same doesn't matter just yeah half caramelized onions oh lord is did she put
11:30is this an everything piece and just put it all on it half olives and light sauce oh of course you
11:36got to go light sauce you don't want to overdo it yeah so just so just imagine somebody sending you to
11:42uh grab a pizza and it's that so the guy the husband decided to write a little note on the order
11:48and it says this quote yes i know this looks insane and you're probably like who is this dude
11:55i have very pregnant wife i'm done questioning what she wants i'm scared of her and honestly you should
12:02be too thank you and godspeed god bless that guy he's 100 right that good for him actually using the
12:08notes feature i'd never use the note like any special instructions when i'm ordering food because
12:12i'm like what special instructions could i possibly have this is it yeah this is it i did that one time
12:17and they did not listen they were like y'all don't pay attention to this success with that really yeah
12:23with the special instructions on uber eats yeah like you know because you know whatever whatever
12:28it's been fine it never worked with me well i tried it one time yeah didn't work i'm like all right
12:34y'all don't read this so the best part of that whole note is i'm scared of her yeah we can relate
12:40yeah so there's a couple people that actually commented on this and said he didn't order pizza
12:46he submitted a cry for help somebody else said that pie sounds fire oh i'd eat it she must try it
12:53that person must be pregnant there's a lot of stuff i i'm i'm somebody else said now i'm scared to get
12:58my girl pregnant fair i think that sounds fair yeah i i'm just so intrigued as to like which
13:06half was on which like i want to know what the flavor profiles are i wish i wish i i wanted to
13:11see it they didn't take a picture of yeah but um hopefully next i don't know she's still pregnant
13:15now if she ordered this pizza again please take a picture of it wait but how does she with all the
13:20things she knew she was going to put on it the most egregious thing is still triple pepper you know
13:25you got to put a whole bunch of stuff you started by a flat layer of pepperoni before we added all
13:29this extra stuff all on pepperonis half chicken half oh man none of that chicken none of them always
13:35none of that is sticking because all the cheese underneath is just covered by pepperoni yeah but
13:40light sauce cheese light sauce that piece is gonna be dry about it and a large diet coke yeah
13:47all right this is where i usually do a special salute or thoughts and prayers and all that stuff
13:56this today i'm gonna just do just throwing this out here not saluting it so i ran across this story
14:03about a man uh who had a working cigarette lighter in his stomach for 30 years excuse me like a bick or
14:11something yes one of those oh for some reason my dumb self thought about like the car cigarette light
14:16oh how does that work that actually probably would have been a little better than a actual
14:20working bick type of light lighter so uh 60 year old man in china was dealing with some stomach pain
14:28and bloating and he realized it was from a plastic lighter that he swallowed on a dare 30 years ago
14:35oh my goodness they first of all what are you doing swallowing a lighter did he think that was
14:43gonna pass yeah so what they did was he didn't just swallow the lighter hole i think he put it in
14:49some type of um like i don't know if it was like a condom light material yeah so he can like a balloon
14:56of sorts yeah yeah so like you're smuggling you know drugs or something yeah so it's been i'm also
15:01blaming that comment on andy reed because what is that what it was tickling that's that's a common
15:06goodness gracious with some drugs in a balloon and yeah and uh for what it's worth for what it's worth
15:11the doctor said the lighter still worked it's a tuesday man what is happening today that's what
15:17they do hey i'm just throwing it out there i ain't saluting it yeah just well salute the doctors
15:23yeah shout out to your your friend your favorite doctor that you know if you've never asked them
15:29about their crazy story you're doing this wrong yeah yeah they've got fantastic stories about the
15:34things that they've seen go in or out of places or absurd things that they've heard has happened
15:39yeah man that's just a reminder if you know somebody who's in the profession just ask them
15:43what the crazy story is you know for a fact they all wanted to see if it worked like they finally
15:48got it out they're like let's see if that thing 100 yeah they click it and they're like they look
15:52nasty too man that's crazy uh there you go figgy's mixtape uh from the 713 they said live in austin
15:58one time they took a waymo couldn't turn right into the apartment complex kept driving around in
16:03circles had to call customer service and 20 minutes later it stopped like two blocks away
16:07the rep asked for review 0.2 stars out of 10 fair enough fair enough so there you go all right
16:15yeah that was not a advertisement for waymo because all the things sounded bad you might you might
16:19circle around your block for 20 minutes or you might get in i'm gonna give it about five years
16:24before i consider trying you don't let other people work out the case yeah yeah
16:28okay all right
16:35you
16:35you
16:37you
16:37you
16:39you
16:39you
16:39you
16:39you
16:41you
16:41you
16:41you
Be the first to comment