- 1 hour ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:30Welcome, welcome, welcome to Last Week Tonight.
00:33I'm John Oliver, thank you so much for joining us.
00:35It has been a very busy week.
00:38COP30, the UN's climate conference,
00:40began without an official delegation from the US.
00:43The last ever penny was minted in Philadelphia.
00:46And in Russia, a new AI robot was unveiled.
00:48And it didn't go great.
01:00It's incredible.
01:17Every single part of that is perfect, from the robot's gait,
01:20which gives drunk grandpa going to piss after accidentally falling asleep in his chair,
01:24to it being dragged off stage like a bachelorette being removed from a nightclub,
01:29to, I'm sorry, that curtain.
01:31And I don't want to judge here, but it feels like bare minimum.
01:35You shouldn't be allowed to work anywhere near engineering
01:37if you cannot successfully unfurl a curtain on the first try.
01:42Meanwhile, in Washington, the government shutdown ended after eight Senate Democrats caved.
01:46So Wednesday really should have been a good day for the president until this happened.
01:52President Trump refusing to answer why he won't let the FBI release the Jeffrey Epstein files,
01:58even as just revealed messages written by the sex offender,
02:01raise new questions about their friendship,
02:03and whether Trump was aware of Epstein's crimes.
02:06Trump's name coming up again and again.
02:09In a 2017 email to former Treasury Secretary Larry Summers,
02:13Epstein writing,
02:14I have met some very bad people, none as bad as Trump,
02:18not one decent cell in his body, so yes, dangerous.
02:22Wow, that doesn't look great.
02:25When even the guy running the pervert express to crime island
02:30thinks that you are a dick.
02:31That has got to sting. I know that Trump seems to be immune to shame,
02:36but come on, at some point, he's going to look at himself in the mirror,
02:40and even if briefly, think,
02:42not as bad as me.
02:45Captain Freak of the floating sex dungeon thinks I am the worst.
02:50Fuck, that is rough.
02:53The White House has been in damage control mode ever since,
02:55even insisting that the emails prove Trump did nothing wrong,
02:58which they very much do not, but perhaps the boldest attempt to spin these revelations
03:03came from Megyn Kelly, who, for some reason,
03:05felt it was important to make one thing clear.
03:08I do know somebody very, very close to this case,
03:11who is in a position to know virtually everything.
03:13Jeffrey Epstein, in this person's view, was not a pedophile.
03:17This is this person's view, who was there for a lot of this,
03:20but that he was into the barely legal type.
03:22Like, he liked 15-year-old girls.
03:26And I realize this is disgusting.
03:27I'm definitely not trying to make an excuse for this.
03:29He wasn't into, like, eight-year-olds,
03:32but he liked the very young teen types
03:36that could pass for even younger than they were,
03:38but would look legal to a passerby.
03:42Look, it's, you can say that's a distinction without a difference.
03:46No, it's not.
03:46I think there is a difference.
03:48There's a difference between a 15-year-old and a five-year-old.
03:51You know, it's just whatever.
03:52Yeah, that clip starts with,
03:54I know someone who's super in the middle of all the Epstein shit,
03:57and it somehow gets sketchier from there.
04:01Because if I'm understanding you there, and I am definitely not,
04:04Epstein wasn't into eight-year-olds.
04:06He was just into very young teens who could pass for even younger,
04:10while also to passers-by still somehow managing to look legal.
04:14And you felt that this was an important numerical distinction
04:17to bring up to your yes-anding friend here.
04:19Look, I am clearly no stranger to sharing upsetting numbers with my audience,
04:24but please do kill me if I ever start doing pedophile math.
04:28Now, the House is apparently set to vote this coming week
04:33on whether the DOJ must release all its Epstein files,
04:36so there will clearly be a lot more to say about this going forward.
04:39But for now, we're going to dive straight in with our main story this week,
04:42which concerns public media. It's brought us Sesame Street, NPR's Tiny Desk Concerts,
04:48and the Joy of Painting with Bob Ross, which once featured this exceptional reveal.
04:54Okay, we'll just put a little of that color on the fan brush.
04:57And in our world, maybe there lives what it does now,
05:01just some happy little trees back in here.
05:05These little trees would be a super place for my little squirrel.
05:08If you've painted with me before, you know I have all kind of little creature pets.
05:12I'm going to share with you today my latest little squirrel that's living with me.
05:15He is the most precious little thing. You have to force him to eat, see.
05:21We call him Peapod the Pocket Squirrel.
05:24Oh, my God! Peapod the Pocket Squirrel might be the best sequence of words in the history
05:32of the English language. And admit it, for a moment, you thought he was talking
05:36about an imaginary squirrel there. You heard him say,
05:39these little trees would be a super place for my little squirrel,
05:41and you assumed he was referring to an animal he was about to paint,
05:44not a living rodent on his person. Even when he moved the dropper towards his pocket,
05:49a physical squirrel wasn't on your mental horizon. You just figured,
05:52it was a weird paint tool, and then no way was a real-life fucking squirrel
05:57chilling in this guy's clothes. There is just no fucking way.
06:00What if it ships? But have you ever been happier to be wrong?
06:05Also, fun fact, Peapod wasn't Bob Ross's only squirrel.
06:08He apparently built an enormous cage outside of his home,
06:11in which he nursed orphaned squirrels back to health,
06:14which is presumably why this absolute banger of a photo exists.
06:19And sorry to every living supermodel, but that is a pout.
06:24Anyway, in America, almost all public media falls under the Corporation for
06:29Public Broadcasting, which until recently distributed funding to over 500 radio and TV grantees,
06:34representing more than 1,500 locally managed and operated stations nationwide.
06:39Together, the system reaches nearly 99% of the US population with free programming and services.
06:45And public media has been truly innovative in reaching underserved audiences.
06:49It was Public TV station that first invented closed captioning in the 1970s,
06:53and stations around the country offer programming in Haitian Creole, Navajo,
06:57Vietnamese, and many other languages. But as you undoubtedly know,
07:01it is now facing a serious threat. As over the summer, Congress decided to eliminate 1.1 billion
07:07dollars that have been allocated to fund public broadcasting for the next two years.
07:10It was something that Trump celebrated like this.
07:14Public broadcasting, they've been looking to get it out of there for
07:17billions and billions of dollars. And very, very unfair, very, very unfair reporting.
07:23They would, I would say they make CNN look honest. And, uh, we got rid of it finally.
07:30We got rid of it. We got rid of billions of dollars that was wasted on that.
07:35You know what? I can't explain this in a precise way, but Donald Trump proudly slurring his way
07:40through another on-purpose disaster might be the scientific opposites of Bob Ross and Peapod.
07:45In fact, if you play those two clips at the same time, I think the world might explode.
07:50But it is true. In July, Congress approved Trump's plan to eliminate the CPB's funding entirely.
07:56It is one of many egregious actions this administration has taken, which is why
08:00the number one search on Google this year is probably going to end up being,
08:04wait, can the government do that? And all of this has understandably upset a lot of people,
08:10even some that you may not have thought would be fans of public media, like this guy.
08:15Public radio, it's a national treasure. I mean, uh, where else would you go?
08:20As a young man, I watched Ginger Baker have a drum-off against the drummer from Rat.
08:30And, you know, you know, on Rock School on PBS. You're not going to find that on network television.
08:37And not to mention Sesame Street. I mean, look, this is, this is Mr. Rogers. It's quality
08:43programming and it always has been. And it's a damn shame to just throw it in the toilet like that.
08:49Okay. So there is a lot to say there, but mostly the top half of him is not the problem.
08:56But I know what you're thinking. You are thinking, I had no idea that the Berserker Blothar,
09:02lead vocalist of heavy metal band Gwa, was such a fan of public media, but apparently he is.
09:07And it is both beautiful and confusing to watch him utter the words, Mr. Rogers,
09:13as it's hard to imagine them in the same universe. Although I'll say,
09:16I would love to have seen Gwa on, Mr. Rogers. Blothar, you are special just the way you are.
09:22Your diseased undercarriage composed of abscess riddled penises makes you, you.
09:28But he is right. This budget cut is devastating. Actually, maybe take that down.
09:33This cut, this cut will be felt all over, but especially in rural, remote and tribal communities.
09:40One analysis estimates that as many as 115 stations, collectively serving 43 million Americans,
09:46are likely to close by mid-next year. And as a DJ at this Colorado station explains,
09:51these stations can fill a vital community role.
09:54One of the things that we do is provide public service announcements that, uh, inform people of
10:01meetings that are important to the community that they don't always get in a timely fashion.
10:06Otherwise, some examples that I just read on this morning show included an announcement about a
10:13distribution of school supplies that is occurring today. Here's an announcement about a free sloppy
10:20Joe luncheon for veterans and homeless. Exactly. That man who looks like Santa Claus if he got just
10:27the right amount into the Grateful Dead is completely right. He should also, by the way, probably be
10:32public radio's new mascot given he has the quintessential public radio voice beard and general vibe.
10:38Honestly, if the next NPR tote for sale does not have that man's face on it, they're leaving money on the table.
10:45The point is public media provides incredible benefits to the communities that it serves
10:50and it has just suffered a gigantic blow. So given that tonight, let's talk about public media,
10:56how it works, what it does, and how we go forward. And let's start with the fact that the system
11:01as we currently know it started when LBJ signed the Public Broadcasting Act of 1967
11:06into law, announcing it like this.
11:08This corporation will assist stations and producers who aim for the best
11:14and broadcasting good music and broadcasting exciting plays and broadcasting reports on the whole
11:21fascinating range of human activity. It will try to prove that what educates can also be exciting.
11:32It will get part of its support from our government, but it will be carefully guarded from government
11:40or from party control. It will be free and it will be independent and it will belong
11:47to all of our people.
11:49Yeah, that was a bold move. The kind of thing that takes some truly enormous balls, which,
11:54as you should know from recordings that we've played of LBJ complaining to the head of the company
11:58that made his trousers, that the crotch down where your nuts hang is always a little too tight,
12:03he definitely had. And quick side note, you may remember a few weeks ago, we had this potentially
12:09life-size replica of LBJ's balls made and offered them to his presidential library. Well, I've got good
12:15news and bad news. The good news is we heard from them. The bad news is they politely declined our offer,
12:22but in doing so said, please accept this basket of fruit and nuts as a token of our appreciation
12:28for all you do. This is the basket they sent, which contains, and this is true, a variety of nuts
12:33and fruits all in sets of two, which is excellent. Anyway, as Lyndon Balls Johnson just said,
12:42that one act authorised the creation of the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, which then
12:47in turn created PBS and NPR. But the CPB's role wasn't to directly produce content or oversee
12:54public media as a state arm. It was primarily to distribute funding for it while crucially
12:59remaining independent of the government. That is why the CPB is a private non-profit corporation.
13:06The only issue is that despite not being a government agency, it is still funded like one,
13:11as its funding is embedded in the annual congressional appropriations process. And because Congress
13:15controls its funding, that's always left the CPB vulnerable to political attacks. Almost from the
13:21start, it has been a punching bag for Republicans. Just two years after it was created, Nixon proposed
13:27slashing its funding in half, reportedly, to help meet the financial demands of the Vietnam War,
13:32because apparently the CPB was a bad use of public money, unlike, you know, Vietnam.
13:39That is what led to this famous moment in a hearing about the CPB's funding when Fred Rogers
13:44addressed a skeptical senator and described what his show was all about.
13:49This is what I give. I give an expression of care every day to each child
13:56to help him realize that he is unique. I end the program by saying,
14:02you've made this day a special day by just your being you. There's no person in the whole world like you,
14:10you. And I like you just the way you are. And I feel that if we in public television can only
14:19make it clear that feelings are mentionable and manageable, we will have done a great service.
14:28I think it's wonderful. I think it's wonderful. Looks like you just earned the 20 million dollars.
14:35Wow. That is a truly heartwarming thing that would never ever happen today.
14:44If Mr. Rogers had given that exact same testimony this year, Ted Cruz would have called him a radical
14:50left lunatic, Fox News would have run with the headline, Mr. Rogers' Socialist Neighbourhood,
14:54and the White House would have posted an AI video of President Trump kicking him in the balls.
15:00But while public media's funding was saved on that day, it has been threatened consistently ever
15:05since, usually with complaints about its so-called liberal bias.
15:09Why is there this small elite group at the Corporation of Public Broadcasting that gets to
15:13spend money they didn't earn? What right do they have to dole out your money?
15:18I think the people at PBS, uh, see themselves as social agents. They see themselves as having this
15:24great forum, this great platform to push what they think will be the good society.
15:28It is brainwashing the American people, and more significantly, American children,
15:34with un-American, anti-family, pro-crime, fake news.
15:39Okay, so a few things in order. First, what right do they have to spend money they didn't earn?
15:44Applies to literally any use of taxpayer money. And also, congratulations to Newt and Calista
15:48Gingrich on their documentary, Journey to America, released this year on, guess what, PBS.
15:53Second, if you're curious why this guy was speaking on behalf of a group called
15:57Concerned Women for America, so am I. And finally, as for Marjorie Taylor Greene's comments,
16:04I think we all know what she means by anti-family, but I'd love to know what PBS programming is being
16:10interpreted as pro-crime. Is it the episode of Arthur where the brain gets himself into a Dr. Jekyll and
16:15Mr. Hyde situation? Because I guess you could argue that it inspires kids to commit potion-fueled
16:21vandalism, but I think the only real crime involved is that this song has been lodged in my brain for
16:26over two decades now.
16:39That song will now be in your head until the day that you die.
16:43It was my curse and now it is yours too. Anyway, that clip is from earlier this year at a hearing that
16:49Greene chaired where the CEOs of NPR and PBS were questioned about why, in her words, taxpayer funds
16:54were being spent on left-wing echo chambers for mostly wealthy white urban liberals and progressives
16:59who generally look down on and judge rural America. This hearing was absurd. Again and again,
17:06members of Congress would take a tiny out-of-context snippet, sometimes of something that aired
17:11on just one station, and demand that the heads of those organizations defend them. Here is one
17:16congressman who thought he really had something.
17:19Do you think that you should publish something that calls trees racist?
17:23Is that, in retrospect, should you have published, uh, that?
17:28I'm not sure what you're referring to.
17:30You had a segment that called, it was called Racist Trees and it was a, I mean,
17:34we've already referenced a number of times. So, I mean, do you think trees can be racist?
17:37I guess that's a good one. I, I don't know what you're talking about.
17:40I've never heard of what you're referring to.
17:42All right.
17:43Well, I have because we looked it up and it turns out it wasn't a segment about how trees are racist.
17:48It was this documentary telling the story of a historically black neighborhood in Palm Springs
17:52and their decades-long fight for the removal of a wall of trees that many believed were
17:56originally planted as a totem of segregation.
17:58So, I guess I'd answer his question of, do you think trees can be racist?
18:03With a question of my own, specifically,
18:04do you understand that the titles of movies are not always a hundred percent literal?
18:10The Shining is not about a successful shoe polishing business.
18:14And The Wolf of Wall Street isn't about an actual wolf with a successful investment strategy.
18:19Now, should it have been? Absolutely it should, but sadly, it wasn't.
18:24And look, there can be a good faith debate over bias in the media, liberal or otherwise,
18:29but I'll point out that a lot of the time, what conservatives claim as liberal bias is often just
18:34things like showing there's a long history of racism in America or that gay people exist,
18:40making it hard to interpret those criticisms as anything other than bigotry. And yet,
18:45arguments like those just got used to justify zeroing out the entire budget of the CPB,
18:51which isn't just stupid. In many places, it'll actually have the exact opposite of the intended
18:56effect. And to understand why, it's worth talking about where all those federal dollars went.
19:01Because while some of the CPB's funding did go directly to PBS and NPR at the national level,
19:07the vast majority of it, more than 70 percent, went directly to local public radio and television
19:13stations, who used it to do things like produce local programs, purchase equipment and acquire
19:17national programming like All Things Considered and the PBS News Hour. And for many stations,
19:23that was just one way they got funded, because none relied completely on the federal government.
19:27In fact, one survey found that on average, local public TV stations relied on federal funding
19:31for 18 percent of their budgets, with radio stations having an average reliance of around 14 percent.
19:37And a big way they've always made up the difference is through, as you undoubtedly know,
19:42viewers or listeners like you. That is why so many stations seem to be constantly running pledge drives.
19:48Just take this one from Washington State in 1999, featuring a certain former co-star of mine.
19:54Please call in at 1-800-443-1999 and subscribe, because you can't get programming like Mr. Bean,
20:03you can't get programming like Red Dwarf, anywhere else except for Channel 9.
20:06As you've already seen tonight, British comedy is so amazing, and you can't get that on any other channel,
20:13practically. And it's so wonderful that Channel 9 can bring this to you. Rowan Atkinson is a genius,
20:19and it's just so great that we can bring you all the episodes in one entire night. Mr. Bean is a
20:26phenomenal television program in Britain, and you asked for it to be here in Washington, and you get
20:32an entire evening of it, and it's just wonderful. I just can't tell you how I am so excited about
20:39Mr. Bean and things like Black Adder, and Red Dwarf, and British comedy, brought to you on Channel 9.
20:44So please call. Yeah, that is a young Joel McHale going all out to raise money for his local PBS
20:50station, and he was going in hard on the Mr. Bean element there. Those clips go from, wow,
20:56Joel really likes Mr. Bean, to wait, did Mr. Bean say he's gonna pay him, to did Mr. Bean say he's gonna kill him?
21:03The point is, some local stations heavily depend on donations to get by, and a lot are operating on
21:10a shoestring to begin with, like this one in Louisiana. Before the sun comes up. Alarm went
21:16off at four in the morning. Got here at 5.30. Jeff Farrell turns on the lights at the only NPR
21:23news radio station in Shreveport, Louisiana. Partly cloudy in 73. Farrell is the only full-time
21:30news employee at Red River Radio. He's the news director, on-air host. The time is now 8.04.
21:38Field producer. How much of a difference? Writer. You're listening to the market. And sound editor.
21:4415-hour days covering news in three states. Do I rest for a second? Yeah. I'll take a quick,
21:50like, 15-minute, uh, like, pause and then recharge. So you sleep in your office?
21:55Sometimes. Holy shit. The only thing more alarming than that man's workload is the way he briefly
22:05dissociated it before saying, sometimes. That was either an existential cry for help,
22:10or he just figured out how to micro-nap in the middle of an interview.
22:14But having a tiny staff is not uncommon. And in some parts of the country,
22:18particularly less affluent or more rural areas, stations may not be able to raise what they need
22:23through their communities, so they've relied more heavily on federal funding. Remember how I said
22:28stations relied on it for around 14 to 18 percent of their budgets? That's an average. For some,
22:33it's been much more. Because while WNYC, New York's public radio station, lost about 4 percent
22:38of its annual budget when the CPP got cut, KLND in McLaughlin, South Dakota, lost 50 percent,
22:44and KSHI on the Zuni Pueblo in New Mexico, lost 96 percent. And when budgets get slashed,
22:51one way an outlet can cut costs is by producing less local reporting and relying more on content
22:57that they license from NPR and PBS at the national level. So while I personally think
23:01the Greens caricature of them pumping out un-American programming that doesn't reflect
23:04community values is total bullshit, the irony is the more local stations' budgets are slashed,
23:10the more they may come to rely on programming produced in those urban echo chambers.
23:15As the executive director of a station in California said, the local stuff that's so important to
23:19people is probably the stuff that'll go away. And it's worth talking about what some of that local
23:25stuff is, because it can be woven into people's lives in all sorts of ways. High school sports,
23:30for instance, have become some of the most popular local programs on PBS stations, with the former CEO
23:35of Arkansas PBS saying it's one of those things that everybody loves, but isn't necessarily a money-making
23:40venture, so commercial networks aren't going to really commit to high school sports. Other areas
23:45use public media in quirky ways in rural Northern California. This station has a regular segment called
23:50Trading Time, where people call in to offer items to sell, trade, or give away. And during pledge drive
23:56season, callers will sometimes even contribute the proceeds back to the station, leading to
24:02once-in-a-lifetime offers like this one. Good morning. We have a bidet that we just remodeled
24:10the bathroom. Took out the bidet that we weren't using. It's an excellent condition. It's a Kohler.
24:15And if you go to get one new, they're like three or four hundred bucks, but we will sell this one
24:21for $50 or best offer and donate all the money to the pledge drive. Okay, so it's a good day for a bidet.
24:29John and Mendo's got one for you. If you buy it, $50 or best offer. He's going to donate that right to the station.
24:36Wonderful.
24:37Yeah, it is wonderful. It's also, let's be honest, super weird. The saddest six-word story may be
24:46for sale, baby shoes never worn, but the weirdest one is for sale, used bidet for charity.
24:54And if you, like me, thought that was another artifact of the 90s, you should know it is from
25:00three weeks ago. And it is great to know that public radio can still be a resource for bidet-related
25:06news and discussion. All this time, I thought the only place to go for that was the bidets
25:11subreddit where you can find posts like, I didn't buy a bidet, I bought an amusement park ride for my butt.
25:16Having a bidet at home has really ruined the allure of pooping at work. My bidet keeps splashing
25:23into my balls. And this similar post, husband's chestnuts getting busted in Canada, which goes on
25:29to say, husband's honey nuts getting brutalized by the bidet. Gentlemen, help him. Canadian
25:34cantaloupes are compromised.
25:36But obviously, it is not all high school sports and bidets. In some places, public media is the
25:42only source of local news. According to one analysis, in nine counties, a public broadcasting
25:47station is the sole source of local news coverage. And in 47 others, it's one of only two, with the
25:54other typically being a weekly newspaper. And local public media scored some amazing scoops to rattle off
26:00just a few. In West Virginia, these outlets uncovered the fact that Bob Murray, friend of the pod,
26:06fought back, fought against black lung regulations and then filed for black lung benefits for himself,
26:11which is exactly the kind of behavior that might lead someone to tell you to go eat shit.
26:16In Alaska, KTOO broke the story of a massive food stamp backlog affecting thousands of people,
26:22with the Alaska Press Club later writing that it was the reporter's community-based reporting and
26:26relationships with sources that brought light to a state problem that affected thousands of Alaskans
26:31whose voices needed to be heard. And a reporter at this radio station in New Hampshire produced
26:35both a massive investigation and this podcast about alleged sexual misconduct at the largest
26:41addiction treatment center in the state. And she kept at that reporting even as the target of
26:46her investigation sued her in her station and as her house and those of her parents and her boss
26:50were vandalized. And that's something that she later explained to her public TV station.
26:56My husband checks our security cameras and sure enough, um, a brick had been thrown through
27:01my living room window and, uh, the words just at the beginning were spray painted, exclamation point,
27:07under the broken window. Um... And you have a young daughter. I do have a young daughter.
27:11Was there a point when you thought maybe I won't be continuing this? Did it make you think about
27:16dropping this, not wanting to continue working on it? You know, um, I never considered stopping.
27:24Yet that is incredibly brave. Especially because I'm assuming that that message didn't continue
27:29just the beginning of a storied career in investigative journalism.
27:32Keep up the good work. P.S. The brick is made of chocolate.
27:36The point is local public media is filled with impressive reporting like that. In fact,
27:41we've relied on it on this show in pieces that we've done about HOAs, juvenile justice,
27:46and in our first and second lethal injection stories. And if you're hearing those and thinking,
27:51man, this show is more depressing than I remembered, girl, same.
27:55And as this manager for a tribal station in Oregon explains, if budget cuts means she can't afford
28:01to broadcast news to her listeners, that's going to be a problem not just for her station, but for everyone.
28:07We do our own local newscasts and we can cover Warm Springs better than anybody.
28:11Um, mainstream media doesn't necessarily show up unless something very bad has happened.
28:15She'll have to make cuts, and she expects to lose access to national news and tribal networks.
28:21Native America calling in national native news, and those are programs that people here love
28:27and tune in for like every day at 10 o'clock. Leaving the high desert at risk of becoming a news desert.
28:34There'll be like a void where probably incorrect information will grow.
28:39Exactly. And I know that when you hear void where incorrect information will grow,
28:43you immediately think of whatever infinite chasm is behind Megyn Kelly's eyes, but in this case,
28:48it means something else and even beyond news. Public media can be how critical information
28:53gets disseminated in communities with limited broadband or cell service. Public radio may be
28:58the only way to distribute missing and endangered persons alerts. It can also be crucial during an
29:03emergency like a hurricane. Remember that station where one guy is the only full-time news employee?
29:08If it goes away, a lot goes with it.
29:11About 19 percent of Louisiana lives in poverty and 15 percent don't have internet access,
29:17according to the U.S. Census.
29:19You can't afford satellite TV. You can't buy cable. And they're alone. And so it is a lifeline. And what's
29:29great about this is that they feel connected. They stay connected to the world.
29:33These radio emergency alerts are vital during hurricane season, warning folks where and when
29:40storms will hit.
29:41I put radio saves lives. The emergency broadcast system. Without it, people would die.
29:48Right. Without their emergency broadcast system, people would die. If you take one thing away from
29:54this piece, it really should be that. Even though, unfortunately, it will probably be this instead.
29:58Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll, Jekyll.
30:03You're living this for the rest of your life. This is never, ever leaving your brain. It's tattooed onto your eardrums.
30:10Look, it's not just that. Some stations have also jumped in to serve their listeners, even when they're not prepared to.
30:16Take Blue Ridge Public Radio in North Carolina, which had to pivot into emergency alerts during
30:20Hurricane Helene last year when its small staff of seven didn't just report through the storm and immediate
30:26aftermath. But they also kept working through a 53-day stretch where locals didn't have access
30:31to clean water. And if you hear the messages they got from listeners afterwards, you get a picture of
30:37just how much their work meant to people.
30:39You guys were wonderful, and you sustained me. I was isolated on a mountainside.
30:46My wife and I are so thankful for your constant presence during this crisis. Keep it up. We love you.
30:51Thank you guys so much for being there. It's just gonna make me cry because you're the only source
30:58of information that we've had. Thank you. Bye-bye.
31:03Yeah, that's incredibly moving. Honestly, I feel like I'm gonna cry, and I haven't cried at a radio
31:08segment since that time I heard about a near mint-conditioned cola bidet being sold for the low,
31:14low price of $50.
31:17So that is what is at stake here. And while some might suggest that the free market will fill in the gaps,
31:22in many cases, these stations only exist because the free market has shown that it won't.
31:28Because unfortunately, it may well not find value in localized emergency alerts
31:32during hurricanes, or announcing free sloppy joes for veterans, or even in pocket squirrels,
31:36which is madness given they should clearly be the most valuable commodity on the fucking planet.
31:42As the general manager of Blue Ridge Public Radio told one reporter,
31:46NBC Nightly News can show you pictures of devastating flooding,
31:49but they don't tell locals where to get fresh water. NBC News is not for that.
31:55And she's right. NBC isn't focused on emergency information on the local level.
31:59It's clearly focused on one thing and one thing only, keeping Lorne Michaels alive.
32:04And frankly, it's always been a bit weird how little we fund public media, given how vital it can be.
32:10Because to be clear here, US public media is a global outlier in how little federal funding it receives.
32:16Even before these cuts, federal spending amounted to less than $1.60 per capita audit,
32:21compared to countries like Norway, Sweden, and the UK, which devote nearly $100 or more.
32:26And research shows a positive correlation between the strength of public media,
32:30systems, and the health of democracies. And given that the health of our democracy
32:35is currently best described as that one photo of Prince Philip where he was in the car,
32:40we could use all the public media funding we can get right now.
32:45So, what can we do? Well, in a universe in which a competent, effective government
32:49were in place, we'd ideally work on a long-term fix for the way the CPB is funded. And instead
32:54of giving Congress the power to take its money away every two years, we'd institute some kind of tax
32:59or licensing fee that could reliably fund it. That is something people have been recommending
33:03since the CPB was first created. Sadly, we do not live in that universe right now.
33:09And until we do, public media is in a dire situation. Now, fortunately, there's been a big public push
33:15recently to raise money to support hard-hit stations for as long as possible. A non-profit called the
33:20Public Media Company has launched an initiative called the Bridge Funds to collect and distribute
33:24funding to at-risk local public media stations. And if you want to give to one directly,
33:28you can find the stations most in need at adoptastation.org. Meanwhile, others are finding
33:34imaginative ways to raise money, including just this week, this.
33:38Who doesn't love Bob Ross, right? Three original paintings by the renowned TV artist
33:43have fetched a total of $662,000 at auction. Proceeds of the sale will support public TV stations,
33:50which need it after recent federal funding cuts.
33:53Yeah, it's true. Apparently, Bob Ross Inc. is putting paintings like these up for auction
33:58to raise money. And they're absolutely beautiful. Look, I'm no art connoisseur. My liking of painting
34:03often comes down to whether or not it features cartoon rats getting it on. But in this case,
34:08I'll happily make an exception. Now, I'll be honest, we actually bid on those paintings,
34:13trying to win one so that we could re-auction it tonight to benefit public media. Sadly,
34:18those prices were outside of our budget. So we asked the people at Bob Ross Inc. if they'd donate
34:23another one for us to auction. And they said very kindly, that's just not something they'd do.
34:28Otherwise, everyone would ask them all the time and they'd have no paintings left,
34:31which does make sense. But then we remembered, we've actually accumulated a bunch of weird
34:36artifacts on this show over the years that we could definitely auction off to raise some
34:41much needed money. So please, come with me. Welcome. I am proud to announce last week's
34:56tonight's first ever auction in aid of public media. This is real. It will be running through
35:02November 24th. And you can bid at the website, JohnOliversJunk.com, which was inexplicably
35:10available. We have lots of fantastic items up for sale. Here's just a selected few. Now,
35:16our first items have actually been auctioned off before, because you may remember we once bought
35:21Russell Crowe's jockstrap from Cinderella Man when he held a, quote, Art of Divorce auction. He then
35:27used the proceeds to fund a koala chlamydia award in Australia in my name. Well, I'm now happy to say
35:33this life-saving jockstrap can be yours. Here it is. It is a priceless piece
35:41of cinematic history and it has saved countless koalas. Moving on to item number two. Back in season
35:49nine, you may remember that I married a cabbage in a beautiful non-denominational ceremony officiated by
35:55Steve Buscemi. Well, and there is no good way to say this. My cabbage wife is available for sale
36:02to the highest bidder, no questions asked. As much as it hurts for us to split, we are doing it for the
36:08greater good. Bidding for her is now open. Moving on to item number three. And as I mentioned earlier,
36:15these were featured on our show pretty recently. LBJ's giant balls. Just look at these glorious
36:23monstrosities. If LBJ's presidential library does not have a home for them, maybe you do. Because
36:30these things could be a real conversation piece for your living room, bedroom, studio apartment,
36:36or indeed nursery. And in keeping with the presidential theme, we are also auctioning off
36:42our wax presidents, which we bought at an auction in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, and put in movie
36:48parodies with, among others, Laura Linney and Tom Hanks. But wait, because I'm still not done here. And
36:55to tell you about some other items up for auction, here is a man with decades of experience fundraising
37:01for public television, Mr. Joel McHale. Thanks, John. As you've seen tonight, public media is so amazing.
37:09I love it almost as much as I love British comedy, which is so amazing. Rowan Atkinson is a genius,
37:15and anyone who thought they could replace him as Zazu in The Lion King is out of their fucking mind.
37:19That movie was ruined without him. Anyway, I'm so excited to tell you about some of these items,
37:25including these golden sneakers worn by British comedian John Oliver in a show about FIFA that,
37:32judging by this, aired around 25 years ago. So amazing. And because no public media fundraiser is
37:39complete without it, we're also auctioning off a bidet signed by, and this is true, the Berserker
37:45Blothar from GWAR. So amazing. And finally, and this is my favorite item, I think everyone knows how
37:51excited I am about Rowan Atkinson, the number one British comedian of all time. So we're auctioning
37:58off a complete DVD box set of Mr. Bean, signed by me, Sir Joel McHale. Back to you, Seth.
38:07Thank you so much, Joel. All those items and more are available at johnoliversjunk.com,
38:13with all proceeds going to the Public Media Bridge Fund. But wait, there's actually one more thing
38:18here, because remember when I said that Bob Ross Inc. never lets people have paintings to sell? That
38:23is true. They never do. Except incredibly, they've told us they're willing to make a one-time exception
38:29for this auction. So we have this actual Bob Ross original up for sale. It is called Cabin At Sunset.
38:38He painted it on TV in 1987, and it's been in storage for nearly 40 years. It is a true masterpiece,
38:46painted by a man, and I'm just going to assume, his pocket squirrel peepot. You can find this painting
38:52and many, many other items, from a case of John Oliver wine to our giant Reese's mug, as well as a link to
38:58find stations to donate to directly at johnoliversjunk.com. That is it. That is our show, and indeed, our season.
39:06Thank you so much for watching us all year. We truly appreciate it. We'll see you again in February.
39:13Good night. Thank you so much. Please, please bid for her now. Bid, bid right now.
39:24I'm going to miss you so much. You're going to a better place.
Recommended
41:31
|
Up next
21:25
21:26
21:21
21:21
24:23
45:10
20:46
21:25
24:07
32:16
52:22
26:52
23:42
40:04
50:11
44:13
38:47
57:16
2:10:41
1:53:53
1:54:35
Be the first to comment