- 1 week ago
A young couple enter the Dunmow Flitch Trial, in which a side of bacon can be won if a couple do not regret their marriage after a year, but the arrival of an attractive new housemaid throws everything into chaos.
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00:00:00Made in Heaven
00:00:22Marriages are made in heaven
00:00:26Each one is blessed from birth
00:00:30But don't rely on love and blessings from above
00:00:34Needs a little help on earth
00:00:37Marriages are made in heaven
00:00:41And heaven knows their worth
00:00:44But never just decide that heaven will provide
00:00:48Give a little help on earth
00:00:51Sometimes the road is hard and long
00:00:55Life seems all work, no play
00:00:59Somehow your dreams have all gone wrong
00:01:03The marriage made in heaven seems so far away
00:01:06Marriages are made in heaven
00:01:10But each must help his own
00:01:14Just learn to give and take
00:01:16And then one day you'll make a heaven
00:01:21Just like Dobby and Joe
00:01:31In our village we carry on a tradition
00:01:37Established in the reign of Henry VI
00:01:41Each year before a judge and jury
00:01:43A public trial is held of any couple
00:01:46Who can prove that they have passed a year of unmarred
00:01:49Married, married bliss
00:01:51To the successful claimants
00:01:53The court awards a flitch of bacon
00:01:56We honeycrofts are something of an authority
00:01:59On this ancient custom
00:02:01And have always seen it through without a hitch
00:02:03Until last year
00:02:05But never when the Topham's took a hand
00:02:15Jester, Jester come in
00:02:16Jester you silly dog
00:02:17Jester
00:02:18In the morning
00:02:25Morning mother
00:02:26Morning dear
00:02:27Morning father
00:02:28Morning
00:02:29Got your war paint on again I see
00:02:32What is it this time?
00:02:33I've been nominated for the flitch committee
00:02:35And you better watch out
00:02:36The vicar's sister wants your blood
00:02:38Oh not again
00:02:39I gave a pint last week
00:02:40No no no darling
00:02:42I mean she's getting beady eyed about you
00:02:44You know the green eyed monster
00:02:46After all we are foreigners you know
00:02:47Only lived here 15 years remember
00:02:49Truce talks collapse
00:02:51Generals fly back to front
00:02:52Fly back to front?
00:02:53Whatever for?
00:02:54To keep the sun out of their eyes
00:02:55By the way mother
00:02:57I got a letter for you
00:02:58Or rather half a letter
00:02:59Texas had the other half for breakfast
00:03:00Oh he's lucky
00:03:01He's the only one that's eaten here yet
00:03:02Now what's happened to breakfast?
00:03:04It's grandpa's turn
00:03:05Oh crikey
00:03:06Stand by for Stenders
00:03:12If you wake up wishing you'd never been born
00:03:27Listen to this
00:03:34Dear madam
00:03:36We are very pleased to be able to tell you
00:03:38That we have obtained from our Austrian branch
00:03:41A Hungarian domestic
00:03:43She will arrive on the 6.30pm boat train of Victoria
00:03:47The 7th inst
00:03:48When is the 7th inst?
00:03:50Today is the 7th
00:03:52Is it inst?
00:03:53Of course it is
00:03:54Might be alt
00:03:55How could it be?
00:03:56Alt was last month
00:03:58So she's really coming
00:04:00No more indigestion
00:04:01No more midday pangs
00:04:02And no more breakfast
00:04:03Overcooked by grandpa
00:04:04Hip hip hooray
00:04:05She looks a very nice girl
00:04:07I hope she won't get lost in London
00:04:09Nice girls often do
00:04:11I'd better meet her myself
00:04:12I'll go straight from the office
00:04:13Well you'd better take a look at that
00:04:15You've got to recognise her on the platform
00:04:17Yes, I'd better get an eyeful
00:04:20Oh
00:04:22I say, I've just remembered
00:04:24I have a meeting in the office
00:04:25Up until 6.30 tonight
00:04:27That puts me out
00:04:28Oh, what a nuisance, Aubrey
00:04:31Do stockbrokers really work as late as that?
00:04:34Sometimes worse luck
00:04:35Stock taking, mother darling
00:04:37Checking all the stock they haven't broken
00:04:39You can meet her, Basil
00:04:41Not me?
00:04:42Right
00:04:43Miss Hungry of 1910
00:04:46Sorry, father, I shan't have time
00:04:48Oh, yes you will
00:04:49You leave your office 6ish, don't you?
00:04:52Not 6ish, father
00:04:536
00:04:54Very well, you can meet her
00:04:55We'll have supper later
00:04:568ish?
00:04:57No, 8
00:05:00Morning, Marjorie
00:05:01Morning, dear
00:05:02Morning, Aubrey
00:05:03Now I know why people talk about the servant problem
00:05:04Take a look at that, Julie
00:05:05When you get your own house
00:05:06You'll know just what it means to have a maid
00:05:08Whatever she looks like
00:05:09When we get our own house
00:05:11Oh, Grimes is still working on the foundations
00:05:13Well, that's something
00:05:14Yes, but when's he going to finish it?
00:05:16That depends on when he's going to start it
00:05:20It's a place on fire or something
00:05:26There, a little overcooked
00:05:28Now, tell me
00:05:29What do you think of this?
00:05:30Do you want me to tell you, grandfather?
00:05:31No
00:05:32If you wake up wishing you'd never been born
00:05:35Ask your grocer for wheatacorn
00:05:37See, it's Nelly right
00:05:38Wheatacorn born dawn
00:05:40Oh, wait
00:05:42Horn
00:05:43If you wake up hearing the hunting horn
00:05:45Ask your grocer for wheatacorn
00:05:47How's that?
00:05:48Well, you wouldn't have it hunting with you, would you?
00:05:50Oh, I don't know
00:05:51In a sort of sandwich form
00:05:52These are positively the last kippers
00:05:54To be cremated in this house
00:05:56Oh
00:05:57What, have the fisherman's struck?
00:05:58No, we have
00:05:59Oh
00:06:00You won't have to
00:06:01Now we've got a maid
00:06:02Oh, good
00:06:03I wonder if she's any good at slogans
00:06:048.43
00:06:05Oh
00:06:06Nice filling breakfast anyway
00:06:08Now, Basil
00:06:09Don't forget about the maid
00:06:14I must dash
00:06:15What, are you in the fire brigade too?
00:06:17She would be if they asked her to
00:06:18Funny sort of weather
00:06:20I think I shall take my umbrella
00:06:22Darling, you've taken your umbrella every day for 20 years
00:06:24Well, it's been funny sort of weather for 20 years
00:06:26That's why
00:06:27Usual train tonight?
00:06:28Yes, dear, yes
00:06:29I thought you said you'd be late at the office
00:06:30No, dear, no
00:06:31That was last night
00:06:32Aubrey
00:06:33Goodbye, dear, bye
00:06:34Goodbye
00:06:35What is it, dear?
00:06:37Soft sugar
00:06:38There's no soft sugar
00:06:39I have to have my 11s at 10 when I get to the office
00:06:42Never mind, darling
00:06:43It's my turn to cook breakfast tomorrow
00:06:44I say, there's old Grimes' car
00:06:46He must have struck oil
00:06:47If we're not in our own house by Christmas, I'll go mad
00:06:49Well, if we aren't in by Christmas, we'll freeze to death
00:06:51It's not funny, Basil
00:06:52I'll leave you if we have to live with your family much longer
00:06:54They're very sweet, but one can have too much of a good thing
00:06:57And one of you's enough
00:06:58Well, nobody can pretend we're going to get in tomorrow
00:07:05The Topham, sir
00:07:11Morning, Mr. Basil
00:07:13Morning, Mrs. Topham
00:07:14Topham of the morning to you, Mr. Grimes
00:07:18Finished by Christmas?
00:07:19Not a hope, Mr. Basil
00:07:21Ask him when
00:07:22Yes
00:07:23When?
00:07:24No telling, Mr. Basil
00:07:25There's no telling, darling
00:07:26What I always say is
00:07:28You can't make bricks without straw
00:07:30No, I suppose not
00:07:31And there's the timbers
00:07:32As I was saying to Mrs. Grimes last night
00:07:34They don't seem able to see the wood for the tree
00:07:36Don't they?
00:07:37Then there's the fixtures
00:07:38Yes
00:07:39You can get hold of the baths, like
00:07:40But you don't seem able to get hold of the taps
00:07:42Really?
00:07:43Funny thing, though
00:07:44Last year you could get hold of the taps
00:07:45But you couldn't get hold of the baths
00:07:46Well, well, well
00:07:47Still, things are looking up
00:07:48It's better to have a bath without taps
00:07:50And taps without a bath
00:07:51Not so damp, eh, Mr. Grimes?
00:07:53Cheer up, though
00:07:54It's a step in the right direction
00:07:56Eh, Julie?
00:07:57She works in the library
00:08:00Pretty strict there, you know
00:08:02Rather like it to be punctual
00:08:03Then there's the labour
00:08:05Yes, I see it
00:08:06As I always say
00:08:07Rome wasn't built in a day
00:08:09No, but I bet it was finished by Christmas
00:08:11Well, I'm just getting along
00:08:13Yes, sir
00:08:14You don't want to be late at the office
00:08:15Oh, any time does for me
00:08:16I'm my own master, you know
00:08:18I'm sorry, darling
00:08:19Can't stop now
00:08:20Oh, you're just about to...
00:08:21Sorry, darling
00:08:22Can't stop now
00:08:23Oh, you're just about to...
00:08:24What about...
00:08:54Hiya, no
00:09:04Thank you, y'all
00:09:05There you go
00:09:06There we go.
00:09:37Topham!
00:09:48Are these the ones, Mrs Topham?
00:09:50Oh, yes, they're the ones. Thank you, Ethel.
00:09:53Husbands Galore. Oh, that was a lovely book.
00:09:56Oh, Ethel, why do we ever get married? Men are the end.
00:10:00Oh, I think they're lovely. I do, really. Honest, I do.
00:10:03Well, you try living with three.
00:10:04Oh, what a thing to say, Mrs Topham, not three.
00:10:07You can't train a husband in the middle of his family.
00:10:10It's bad for discipline.
00:10:11I tell you, if I have to live with them all much longer, I'll run amok.
00:10:15You'd never.
00:10:16I will.
00:10:18I'll put old Topham in the cove cellar,
00:10:20middle Topham in the dog kennel,
00:10:22and young Topham...
00:10:24And where shall I put Basil?
00:10:27I don't know, I'm sure.
00:10:29Neither do I.
00:10:30Now, look here, Mrs Topham, you shouldn't take on so.
00:10:35Perhaps your husband needs a hobby.
00:10:37Now, take my bird.
00:10:38As soon as he leaves the railway, off he goes with his gown and gets a nice bird for the table.
00:10:43Oh, does he?
00:10:45Where does he shoot them?
00:10:47I don't know, I'm sure.
00:10:49Ask no questions, hear no lies, that's what I always say.
00:10:52Ha, ha, ha.
00:10:55Good morning.
00:10:57Good morning, Miss Honeycroft.
00:10:59Have you a copy of the history of the Dunmow Flitch?
00:11:02We had one at the vicarage and my brother simply cannot find it anywhere.
00:11:06Ah, thank you.
00:11:07My brother and I just want to refresh our memories before the meeting.
00:11:10Oh, yes, I believe Basil's mother's going too.
00:11:12I'm sure she is.
00:11:13But we old horses still pull our weight, you know.
00:11:16Well, I must be running along, the meeting's starting any minute now.
00:11:19Good morning.
00:11:20Good morning, Miss Honeycroft.
00:11:22She gives me the needle, she does really.
00:11:25Oh, well.
00:11:27That'll be all right with the inspector if it's all right with Colonel Hobbs.
00:11:30It's agreed that we ask Colonel Hobbs for the use of the ground as usual.
00:11:33Right, then that's settled.
00:11:35Now, may we have a few words for the vicar?
00:11:38Certainly, Mr. Chairman.
00:11:41I think first of all we should remind ourselves of the essence of this ancient custom.
00:11:45I quote,
00:11:46He that repents him not of his marriage in a year and a day, either sleeping or waking, may lawfully go to Dunmoe and fetch a gammon of bacon.
00:11:55I'd like to see him try these days, he'd get six months.
00:11:57A good point.
00:11:59I have it covered, though.
00:12:01The Ministry of Food informs me that the bacon is on its way from New Zealand.
00:12:04Oh, that's splendid.
00:12:06Now, marriage is, when all is said and done, made in heaven.
00:12:09And I...
00:12:10Thank you, Vicar.
00:12:11Well, ladies and gentlemen, now that Mr. Honeycroft has said all he has to say, let's get on with the doing.
00:12:16That's right.
00:12:17Sergeant Mahon, when it arrives, you'll take it into safe custody at the police station.
00:12:21Oh, no.
00:12:22Custom dictates that it should be kept at the vicarage.
00:12:24And common sense dictates it should be kept at the police station.
00:12:28Are you suggesting that we are not to be trusted with the care of the...
00:12:31Of course not, Miss Honeycroft.
00:12:32I'm sure our chairman was only trying to save you any inconvenience.
00:12:36Very well, then, Vicar.
00:12:37But you'll be responsible.
00:12:38Well, ladies and gentlemen, it seems we've got a fletch.
00:12:41All we need now is a judge, a counsel for the claimants, and a counsel for the bacon.
00:12:46Oh, if I may say so, I think we ought to appoint them now.
00:12:49Well, ladies and gentlemen, any suggestions?
00:12:52I propose Mr. Grimes for the judge.
00:12:55Here, here, here, here.
00:12:57Unanimous.
00:12:59Well, I'll do my best.
00:13:01I should be quite willing to be counsel for the bacon.
00:13:04Agreed, agreed.
00:13:08And as counsel for the claimants, I propose a lady whom we all respect and admire.
00:13:15I'm afraid I couldn't cope.
00:13:17But I'm sure my husband would love to do it.
00:13:20Good. Unanimous.
00:13:25What about the couples? They are the most important, aren't they?
00:13:28This year, none has come forward. It's most disturbing.
00:13:31I doubt there's many's qualified, Vicar.
00:13:34Come on, there's no need to indulge in cynicism. All they need is a lead.
00:13:38Surely it should be easy enough to find one couple.
00:13:41Well, if Mrs. Topham thinks it's so easy, I would have hoped that Mrs. Topham be given the privilege of finding one.
00:13:48Yes, indeed.
00:13:49Only yesterday, Roosevelt was saying that these days you bestrode the narrow Dunmo world like a colossus.
00:13:56You're speaking socially, of course.
00:13:58I second that.
00:13:59Agreed.
00:14:00They're open.
00:14:01Right.
00:14:02Will I declare this meeting closed?
00:14:05I think that's...
00:14:07Yes, I mean...
00:14:09It's getting very much...
00:14:10I think that's...
00:14:40It's going to be a one, almost over here.
00:14:43It's going to finish but this is getting very pretty of
00:14:55that.
00:14:57If I could visit the画 that respects the hope
00:15:00So you can find it better.
00:15:03Probably, surely, anyone at the time,
00:15:06You Şu or You.
00:15:07Excuse me, are you Mr. Topham?
00:15:21Yes.
00:15:22Oh, then I am for you.
00:15:24What?
00:15:25Are you?
00:15:26I say.
00:15:27The agency has told me that there would be a meeting.
00:15:31Good old agency.
00:15:33Then it's you I'm looking for.
00:15:35Rather, yes.
00:15:37Are you the man from Hungary?
00:15:40You didn't think to see me here?
00:15:42Well, yes and no.
00:15:45We do not stay here, do we?
00:15:46Oh, rather not, no.
00:15:48It's far too noisy.
00:15:50You must be hungry.
00:15:51Oh, I am ravished.
00:15:53Well, now, hold on.
00:15:54Okay.
00:16:07Hulk!
00:16:11Hello?
00:16:12Basil? What's the matter?
00:16:16What do you mean, she's ravished?
00:16:18You know, Mother, she's famished, hungry, peckish.
00:16:22She needs building up. A little.
00:16:28Hello? Basil? Hello?
00:16:34Let's go and eat. We can probably get a table in here.
00:16:37In Budapest, we have the reds. Do you have one here?
00:16:40Yes. Would you please look after the porter?
00:16:43Where to, sir? The Ritz.
00:16:50It wasn't a very good photograph you sent from Hungary.
00:16:52I suppose all the photographs out there are mass-produced, wife.
00:16:56It was not I. No, say it wasn't.
00:16:59It was my maid. Your maid?
00:17:02I could not get a job in England when I used to send my photograph.
00:17:05You couldn't? That's funny.
00:17:07I just thought the people would have snapped you up.
00:17:10That is what the wives thought.
00:17:12They're a husband's yellow. So I sent that.
00:17:15So you have a maid?
00:17:16In Budapest, just one.
00:17:19But in the country more, yes, up till 90, 39, we had 15.
00:17:2415. By Jove, a rugger team.
00:17:26Please?
00:17:27No, don't worry. You were saying that in the country?
00:17:30Yes, at my schloss.
00:17:32At what?
00:17:34At my castle.
00:17:35Oh, yes.
00:17:36That was my home.
00:17:37My home, yes.
00:17:38Home?
00:17:40Uh, yes, wait up.
00:17:41Do you have a schloss?
00:17:42No, not a schloss. I've just a home.
00:17:44Uh, wait up.
00:17:49Oh, do sit down, dear.
00:17:50Look, Marjorie, it doesn't take three hours to eat a sandwich of Victoria.
00:17:53They must have had an accident.
00:17:55We ought to ring the police.
00:17:57I thought it was usually the other way around, with the police ringing us up.
00:18:00Much cheaper if they do.
00:18:01Oh, you're all so beastly.
00:18:03Basil's never been as late as this before.
00:18:05Perhaps you've quarreled.
00:18:07We haven't.
00:18:08At least not much, only a little.
00:18:09Around the house.
00:18:12What can they be doing?
00:18:13Don't worry, Julie.
00:18:14I expect they're making a meal of it.
00:18:16In hungry, they probably suffer from the lack of fats.
00:18:19Sounds just the sort of place for you, my dear.
00:18:20Now, don't be ridiculous, Aubrey.
00:18:22There's all the difference in the world between dieting and not eating enough.
00:18:25Not to the casual observer, O'Gell.
00:18:45Oh, how do you do?
00:18:47I, uh, I hope you had a pleasant journey.
00:18:53Please.
00:18:54Would you like to see your room?
00:18:57Please.
00:18:58You must be very hungry.
00:19:00We have left some soup and salad in the kitchen.
00:19:04Oh, no.
00:19:05We have already dined.
00:19:08You've dined?
00:19:10If you can call it that.
00:19:13What else would you like to call it?
00:19:18We have dined at the Ritz.
00:19:20It was so kind of Mr. Bassel.
00:19:24Or, uh, should I call him Master Bassel?
00:19:28No, we gave that up some weeks ago.
00:19:33Do come and see your room, please.
00:19:36Uh-huh.
00:19:45Well, here we are.
00:19:48Mrs. Topham, I understand English.
00:19:51Oh.
00:19:52It's small, of course.
00:19:54But then I always like small rooms.
00:19:56Please, do not let me take it from you, then.
00:19:58Oh, no, no.
00:19:59I have another one.
00:20:00My husband takes up so much room.
00:20:04Dear Nellie, she was very happy here for 20 years, until she joined the ATS.
00:20:10Then she became a little strange.
00:20:13How funny.
00:20:14Nellie must have fought against you, so to speak.
00:20:16Oh, dear, what a small world it is.
00:20:18Well, that's the room.
00:20:20It is not pretty, no, but it is clean.
00:20:26It will be beautiful.
00:20:28I love beauty.
00:20:29I must have beauty around me.
00:20:31Without beauty, life is nothing, as we say in Hungary.
00:20:35Oh, do we?
00:20:37Do you?
00:20:38Well, I hope you will be comfortable.
00:20:40The house is quite labor-saving, but it was too much for me to cope with alone.
00:20:44Of course, my husband and son did their best.
00:20:47But men are so useless, don't you think?
00:20:52Well, now, here is the daily program.
00:20:54First thing, the kitchen boiler.
00:20:56It's simple enough to clean, and never gives a moment's trouble.
00:21:03Now, you see what I mean?
00:21:04The main thing is to keep this thing sort of, uh, sort of...
00:21:13Good morning.
00:21:15Good morning.
00:21:15I was just showing her how.
00:21:18Good idea.
00:21:21Well, don't just stand there gawking if you want to help go and get some coke.
00:21:29Now, with regard to this gas poker...
00:21:32I'm not sure.
00:21:44What happened?
00:21:48Hello, Mother.
00:21:54There's nothing in it, you know.
00:21:55Well, like a lawnmower.
00:21:57Push it forward and...
00:22:02Let me show you with the ass, yeah?
00:22:05Don't you have these things in Hungary?
00:22:06No.
00:22:07Really?
00:22:07Oh, you can't get on without him here.
00:22:08Oh, you can't get on without him, yeah.
00:22:11Goodbye, dear.
00:22:41You have just heard a talk, a talk on manglewurzels by Mr. By Mr. Jack Blackman.
00:23:00Oh.
00:23:01Oh, there you are, darling.
00:23:03She's never seen anything like this before.
00:23:05Neither have I.
00:23:09No.
00:23:11Well, that really was something.
00:23:14Do you know how I stood Lily's cooking for 20 years? I don't know.
00:23:17I must have a cast-iron stomach.
00:23:19You probably have, Father.
00:23:20It's not only the cooking. My boy, food isn't everything. It's the whole caboodle.
00:23:24Look at the house. It looks wonderful.
00:23:26Do you know, she even polished the silver band around my umbrella handle this morning.
00:23:29The initial stood out wonderfully.
00:23:31S.T.
00:23:33They thought your name was Aubrey.
00:23:35I found it in an underground in 1929.
00:23:38You ought to give it back to the lost property office.
00:23:41Hardly worth it. The fellow would have given up looking for it by now.
00:23:44As for my shoes.
00:23:46Pinching?
00:23:47No, shining. Shining like the sun on a car windscreen on the downs in August.
00:23:52Steady on, Father.
00:23:54Wonderful.
00:23:55You know you're a very lucky woman, Marjorie.
00:23:58I'm not so sure. It makes it very difficult to diet.
00:24:01I've got six more pounds to lose before August bank holiday.
00:24:04Maydays, we kept our skeletons in the cupboard. Now they're all over the house.
00:24:08Well, I must be going. It's the drama group tonight. Why don't you come, Marjorie?
00:24:12Julie, you know Mother resigned the year Honeycroft asked her to play Falstaff.
00:24:15Do you mind if I come along instead?
00:24:17Oh, really, Basil. The vicar told me you were quite rude to him the other day when he asked you to join.
00:24:21Yes, as a matter of fact, I've had a bit of conscience about that,
00:24:23so I thought I'd go along tonight and put things right.
00:24:26How nice of you, dear Basil.
00:24:28As a matter of fact, I thought I'd make it up to the vicar in a big way.
00:24:32So I persuaded Marta to join. She's very keen on acting.
00:24:36I quite agree. She never stops.
00:24:39I thought we ought to go on tonight and show her the way to the hall as it's her first night off.
00:24:43You could draw her a map.
00:24:45Apparently they're crazy on acting in Hungary. It's sort of second nature to them.
00:24:48Instead of bridge or bebop, they just clap on the old grease paint and tear off a play.
00:24:52You seem to have been raising the Iron Curtain in a big way.
00:24:55Broadens the mind, do you know?
00:24:58What do they know of England who only England knows?
00:25:01Know?
00:25:04You're wasted on the stock exchange.
00:25:11What is the matter, dears? You're always bickering.
00:25:14I'm sure the food must be too rich. Game every day.
00:25:18I can't think where she gets it from.
00:25:21You're quite right, my dear. I have dreadful intergestion.
00:25:24I think I'll take a walk. I'll stroll along with them.
00:25:27I shall have a chat with the vicar.
00:25:29I haven't seen him for years. He's a nice fellow.
00:25:33People must be nice to him, you know.
00:25:35They're not nice enough to bicker, really.
00:25:47Your stars, how beautiful they are.
00:25:49They're yours too now, you know.
00:25:53Oh! Sorry, darling.
00:25:56How strange it is to think those stars are shining down on Hungary.
00:26:00They may not be. It may be cloudy there.
00:26:02Oh, it must not be.
00:26:03I like to think the stars are shining down upon the villages, upon my schloss.
00:26:07That's the star of Venus there, low down.
00:26:09Maybe she has been naughty and she has fallen down.
00:26:12Nice thought, eh?
00:26:14Ah, vicar, how are you?
00:26:16Ah, Julius, have you persuaded Basil to attend at large?
00:26:19Oh, yes, Julius, most persuasive.
00:26:21And Mr. Topham too.
00:26:22Don't tell me you've persuaded him to attend as well.
00:26:24Yes. Anything to help?
00:26:26That's what I like to hear, enthusiasm.
00:26:28I believe you'd play Hamlet if you thought it would help.
00:26:30Well, I'd have a crack at it.
00:26:32Or Romeo.
00:26:33And who is this?
00:26:34Ah, yes, yes, yes.
00:26:35Oh, this is Marta.
00:26:36She's from Hungary, our help.
00:26:37She helps us all along.
00:26:38From Hungary?
00:26:39Oh, poor child.
00:26:40Poor innocent child.
00:26:42We will protect you here.
00:26:43In England one need have no fear.
00:26:45Hedworth!
00:26:46What?
00:26:47Excuse me.
00:26:48Yes, sir.
00:26:49All right.
00:26:50Yes, sir.
00:26:51In the middle of the year, sir.
00:27:08Ah!
00:27:09What's the matter, Marjorie?
00:27:14A face, a man, a criminal.
00:27:20There's nobody there?
00:27:21Must have been the moon.
00:27:23Leaving me all alone, I might have been murdered in my bed.
00:27:26Yes, but you weren't in your bed, my dear.
00:27:27You spend all day at the office and then come back here and go straight out again.
00:27:32I never see you.
00:27:33Yes, and when you do, you tell me I'm too fat.
00:27:35Oh, Aubrey, what do you want to go to the drama group for?
00:27:38You've never been before.
00:27:39Oh, well, I just thought I'd look in.
00:27:42I've always been interested in the drama.
00:27:44How ridiculous at your age.
00:27:46What do you mean, ridiculous?
00:27:48Oh, Aubrey, you're making me unhappy.
00:27:50I believe I'm losing weight.
00:27:52That ought to make you happy.
00:27:54Yes, and then I'll put it on again.
00:27:56Well, I'll tell you why I went.
00:27:58I didn't want to worry you with it before, but I went to keep an eye on Basil.
00:28:03An eye on Basil?
00:28:04Yes, if you ask me, he's paying too much attention to that little maid.
00:28:08Poor child.
00:28:09Poor lonely child.
00:28:13And another thing.
00:28:15I think it's disgusting the way Honeycroft's given her the lead right away.
00:28:18It took me a whole year of coming on asking who's for a game of tennis before I even had a small part.
00:28:23But darling, how would you like it if you were all alone in Hungary, taken by your kind employers to the local drama group in Bonsk?
00:28:30Where?
00:28:31Bonsk.
00:28:32South-east of Budapest.
00:28:33Wouldn't you expect the local vicar to give you a lead just to keep you cheerful?
00:28:36No, I wouldn't, not unless I was, well, not unless I was, well, not unless I was, not unless you were what?
00:28:40Not unless I was good.
00:28:41But who says Martha isn't good?
00:28:43I'm sure she's good.
00:28:45I'm sure she's very good.
00:28:47Darling.
00:28:47My, my pins.
00:28:49Think of the poor little girl.
00:28:51Almost a child, alone.
00:28:53Alone?
00:28:54Not for long.
00:28:55Not her.
00:28:56Think of it, darling.
00:28:57A stranger in a strange land.
00:29:00Young, beautiful.
00:29:01Beautiful home she's had to leave behind.
00:29:05Darling, don't be jealous.
00:29:08Let her have her a little bit of fun.
00:29:09It's not like you to be jealous, Julie.
00:29:13Oh, darling.
00:29:14Peel, I admire you.
00:29:16Oh.
00:29:22Well, anyway, Mother's very pleased about Marta.
00:29:25Oh, Mother's pleased, is she?
00:29:27Here you are, a surprise.
00:29:35What's this?
00:29:36This is hot milk.
00:29:38Hot milk?
00:29:40But it is good for you.
00:29:42You must be thinking of someone else.
00:29:44I think you need the looking after.
00:29:46I had the looking after from my late wife for 50 years.
00:29:49I'm just beginning to get over it.
00:29:51You give that back to the cow in the morning.
00:29:53Oh.
00:29:57Aubrey, don't you think that we...
00:30:04Why didn't you go to sleep, my dear?
00:30:06Well, I'm so worried about Basil.
00:30:09Oh, she'll keep until morning.
00:30:12I hope.
00:30:14Anyway, there's nothing wrong in liking a pretty face.
00:30:17Do you think she's very pretty?
00:30:18No, no, no, my dear, but when I'm older than Basil, still, I must say she catches the eye.
00:30:29The flitch.
00:30:31It's not her fault.
00:30:32She's pretty, Marjorie.
00:30:33The flitch.
00:30:34I've got it.
00:30:35The vicar wanted me to think of somebody to enter for the flitch trial.
00:30:39I'll enter Basil and Julie.
00:30:41For heaven's sake, why?
00:30:43You have to prove in public that you've had domestic bliss for a year.
00:30:47Yes.
00:30:48That'll keep him out of trouble.
00:30:51Aubrey.
00:30:53Aubrey, are you asleep?
00:30:55No, my dear, no.
00:30:56I...
00:30:56I was just thinking of the flitch.
00:30:59Don't worry, dear.
00:31:00I'll tell the vicar at the square dancing tomorrow night.
00:31:04Square dancing?
00:31:07That's all I need.
00:31:10Oh.
00:31:11Now, circle six like you always do.
00:31:13Take that basket that makes don't do.
00:31:15Pick them up and circle eight.
00:31:17Hurry up, Grandma.
00:31:18You've been late.
00:31:18Now, turn that basket in.
00:31:48Go outside out.
00:31:49Don't be the sweet dish of a truck.
00:31:51Oh, no.
00:31:52No, no.
00:31:54Now, circle eight and round you go.
00:31:57You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:18You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:19You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:20You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:21You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:22You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:23You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:24You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:25You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:26You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:27You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:28You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:29You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:30You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:31You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:32You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:33You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:34You won't come ahead if you carry on so.
00:32:35Let's go.
00:33:05Let's go.
00:33:15And lemonade?
00:33:16Yes, please.
00:33:17Two, please.
00:33:18How is our little refugee?
00:33:20Oh, everybody is so kind to me.
00:33:22Oh, a wonderful girl, Vicar, a wonderful girl.
00:33:24It's a pleasure to sit down to meals now, Vicar.
00:33:27Oh, oh, you're so kind.
00:33:29It's so lovely here.
00:33:31So happy in your country.
00:33:33It's so beautiful.
00:33:36I sometimes wish to cry.
00:33:39Of course, things are so different for me now.
00:33:42I would be so excited on this day at home.
00:33:45Why especially today?
00:33:46Because it's my birthday, Father.
00:33:48I say, really?
00:33:49What a coincidence.
00:33:50Many happy returns of the day.
00:33:52Please.
00:33:53May you have very many more happy birthdays.
00:33:55I'll bet you.
00:33:56I bet you haven't had many yet.
00:33:59I shall never forget my 21st birthday.
00:34:03It was wonderful.
00:34:05On this day, our people came from all over the estate.
00:34:09They brought me presents, fruit and flowers and vegetables.
00:34:14Simple things you understand, but very touching.
00:34:21The good Father Kinyinsky would bring me those whom he deemed worthy of our charity.
00:34:28And he would help me to distribute golden pieces from my treasury.
00:34:47Sausage roll, Hedworth.
00:34:50And then, before lunch, a gallop over the steps.
00:34:53With the captain of my guard.
00:34:55The gallant soldier.
00:34:57And the perfect gentleman.
00:34:59He would have died for me.
00:35:11He was an autocrat.
00:35:14But not unkind.
00:35:29How we would ride across the unknown plain.
00:35:35To a lonely spot.
00:35:37Beneath a tree.
00:35:39There I would take a glass of golden wine.
00:35:42Protected from the bandits by the captain of my guard.
00:35:59And then, at night, my birthday party.
00:36:21The wild throbbing of the balalaikas.
00:36:26Wine and laughter.
00:36:30By my side, the young Count Slabak.
00:36:36Whose estate was next to mine.
00:36:39Two hundred miles away.
00:36:56One hundred miles away.
00:36:58Five hundred miles away.
00:36:59The glad crowWhich.
00:37:00There was a Serbia.
00:37:01The사람 inürvegment of the Coming day.
00:37:02The
00:37:13Give me five thousand six miles away.
00:37:16Got it.
00:37:20Clumsy, dear.
00:37:47Hedworth, are you going to make this announcement or are you not?
00:37:51The dance is nearly over.
00:37:53And in the good old days we danced till five.
00:37:57And then they galloped through the steps till dawn.
00:38:08A very fine little girl, Roosevelt. Generous and charitable.
00:38:12Hedworth!
00:38:17May I have your attention, please?
00:38:26I'd just like to remind you all that next week,
00:38:29on the same day as the Flitch trial and the annual fair and circus,
00:38:32we have our church bazaar.
00:38:34I do hope you'll all collect what you can
00:38:36for my sister's white elephant stall.
00:38:38Yes, dear, all the stuff you bought from it last year.
00:38:42Just bring them along to the vicarage
00:38:44and my sister will tell you what to do with them.
00:38:47Once again the bishop will grace the occasion with his presence,
00:38:51so all hands to the pump and maximum effort everybody.
00:38:54Bring the fair to the fair.
00:38:57And now I have great pleasure in announcing
00:38:59that the couple entering for this year's Flitch trial
00:39:01are our popular young marrieds, Basil and Julie Topham.
00:39:06APPLAUSE
00:39:16On with the dance, the Kokomo Wheel.
00:39:19Honour your partners.
00:39:21I think you might have told him.
00:39:32I thought it was the father's job.
00:39:34No, you did.
00:39:35Well, tonight's mother's night.
00:39:36I think it's scandalous.
00:39:38What is, my dear?
00:39:39Like mother, like son,
00:39:40that proper boy pushing himself forward.
00:39:42Mother.
00:39:43Basil, people are looking.
00:39:45I quite forgot to tell you, Basil.
00:39:48I'm so glad you aren't angry.
00:39:50Well, would you be angry
00:39:52if I entered you to swim the channel?
00:39:54That would be silly.
00:39:55I can't swim.
00:39:56Well, I can't flitch.
00:39:57How could you without even telling us?
00:39:59It wasn't me.
00:40:01You Topham men are all alike, weak as water.
00:40:03What is the good of trying to argue with Marjorie?
00:40:15Basil's being very difficult.
00:40:17Yes, well, they flitch without us for 200 years
00:40:20and they can flitch without us for another 200.
00:40:22They can't.
00:40:23You're the only entrance.
00:40:24Father, you keep out of this.
00:40:25I won't go through with it.
00:40:27You must.
00:40:28If you refuse, the whole village will assume
00:40:30that you and Julie don't get on.
00:40:31Would you do it?
00:40:32That's not the point.
00:40:33Would you, father?
00:40:34You tell me to keep out of this.
00:40:36Of course your father would.
00:40:37He's going to be your counsel.
00:40:38What?
00:40:39You see, aggression always spreads if you're weak.
00:40:42Yes, well, I'm not playing.
00:40:45But Basil, you must.
00:40:47The posters will be printed tomorrow.
00:40:48Mr. Grimes has arranged it all.
00:40:49Oh, has he?
00:40:50Yes, well, I'll go and stop him then.
00:40:52Basil, no.
00:40:53He'll be silly.
00:40:54He'll be having supper now.
00:40:55Yes, and I know what he's having too.
00:40:57Oh, Mr. Grimes, what a thirst.
00:41:12Mr. Grimes, excuse me, please.
00:41:15I'd like a word with you.
00:41:16I know, I know.
00:41:17We've been slow, but I'm setting the boys on overtime next week.
00:41:19Well, I've got the bricks you wanted too.
00:41:21Come down in the morning and choose.
00:41:22Bring the missus.
00:41:23I'd like you to have the colour you want.
00:41:25Well, that's very kind of you.
00:41:26Oh, don't mention it.
00:41:27Well, the moment I heard, I said,
00:41:28Well, there's a couple I'd like to work for.
00:41:31It'd be a pleasure to build a house for a couple who are unselfish enough to want to set our young people an example.
00:41:37Here, here.
00:41:38They sound all right.
00:41:39Who's the couple?
00:41:40Trust you, don't be a little joke.
00:41:43I was only saying to Mrs. Grimes,
00:41:45There's a couple that deserved to win the flitch.
00:41:48You did?
00:41:49Yes.
00:41:50Hey, it's nice to think I'm building a house for the winner of the flitch.
00:41:55I says, I'll give them overtime.
00:41:58I mean, if you're serving the community, it's up to the community to serve you.
00:42:02Mr. Basil, if you win that flitch, I'll have you in your house by Christmas.
00:42:11You will?
00:42:12I say, have another.
00:42:13No, no, don't worry about it, dear.
00:42:15Emmy, two double scotches, please.
00:42:17If you ask me, it's plain disgraceful.
00:42:19You should have to come forward because the locals are too lapsadaisical.
00:42:22If you ask me, Mrs. Jenkins, I think it's utterly disgraceful that our local couples, just because of their natural diffidence,
00:42:29should be shouldered aside by these newcomers from the town.
00:42:32Well, that's what I'm always saying to my Bert.
00:42:34Indeed.
00:42:35Well, I feel that you should enter for the flitch and keep the flag of Dumbo flying.
00:42:39That's what I feel.
00:42:40I'm always telling Bert that's what I feel.
00:42:42Then in that case, I'm sure you will allow me to put down your names.
00:42:45Oh, what a scream.
00:42:47Mr. Basil, dear.
00:42:48Oh, Miss Honeycroft, much as I'd like to, but it's not as if it's just Bert Jenkins being entered.
00:42:54That would be all right.
00:42:55But now I'm nationalised, you'd be entering the British Railway, so to speak.
00:42:58Well, I'm sure they'd appreciate the flitch.
00:43:00The passengers would anyway.
00:43:02Here, easy, Ethel, easy.
00:43:04Miss Honeycroft, I hate to let you down.
00:43:07I'm sure you do.
00:43:08I knew you were a sport.
00:43:10Good night.
00:43:11Miss Honeycroft.
00:43:19Miss Honeycroft.
00:43:20Miss Honeycroft.
00:43:24Miss Honeycroft.
00:43:26Miss Honeycroft.
00:43:27Miss Honeycroft.
00:43:28My dear lady, if he refuses, what are we to do?
00:43:29Well, you must talk to him.
00:43:30Why, I most certainly will!
00:43:32I mean, after all, the bacon's here.
00:43:33Where is Basil?
00:43:34I won't hold it.
00:43:47No, no, please, Basil. Please, just for me, please.
00:43:50You lost the choir, boy. Do you want me to join up?
00:43:52No, no, no. The flitch. Please do not sabotage the flitch.
00:43:56What, me sabotage the flitch? I like that. What, me, vicar?
00:43:59Why, I think the whole thing's a wow.
00:44:01Oh, I am so glad. Your mother gave me the impression
00:44:04that you weren't going through with it.
00:44:05Rubbish, balderdash, nonsense.
00:44:08Basil.
00:44:10Why, this isn't true.
00:44:12Are you all right?
00:44:13Yes, I'm just a little tired, that's all.
00:44:15Are you sure that's all?
00:44:16Of course it's all. I don't know what you're talking about.
00:44:18I say, you look just like my little wife, Julie.
00:44:21Good gracious you are, my little wife, Julie.
00:44:23Everything's splendid, terrific, wonderful, absolutely fine.
00:44:27Oh, this is grand.
00:44:29I wonder, would you mind collecting the flitch from the station
00:44:32and bringing it to the vicarage tomorrow?
00:44:34Of course I will, rather. Have a vick drinker.
00:44:37Have a vick. Did you hear that? Very funny.
00:44:39Have a drink, vicar.
00:44:41Rosabella will be delighted when she hears.
00:44:43She takes the ceremony very seriously, you know.
00:44:45Good.
00:44:48A face. A face at the window.
00:44:52I saw a face.
00:44:55Nobody.
00:44:56That face again.
00:44:58Was it dark, sinister and foreign-looking?
00:45:00It was indeed. Almost like an Irishman.
00:45:03Oh.
00:45:04We must phone the police at once.
00:45:06Basil, look up the number of the police for Mr Honeycroft.
00:45:08I can manage under P.
00:45:11PHONE RINGS
00:45:13Charles, that leaves you double top.
00:45:14Hello?
00:45:15Yes, I know.
00:45:16Who?
00:45:17OK.
00:45:18Police.
00:45:19You're wanted on the blower, Sergeant Marne.
00:45:21Who, me? I'm off duty.
00:45:23What about my five-day week?
00:45:25Good.
00:45:27The Sergeant says he'll be over at once.
00:45:28Sergeant Marne, that's a fair lot of good.
00:45:29Where do you say that?
00:45:30He's probably tired.
00:45:31Been on the job all day.
00:45:32The fellow will be in the next county by the time he gets here.
00:45:34Bicarbonate.
00:45:35Filthy.
00:45:36I'll tell you what, Vicar.
00:45:37You and I handle this.
00:45:38You take the front.
00:45:39I'll take the back.
00:45:40M-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m.
00:45:45Marne.
00:45:46No, no, No, Gain.
00:45:48You can explain it.
00:45:50That's what you've done, Marne.
00:45:52Don't worry, Mother. We'll fix it.
00:45:53Come on, Vicar.
00:45:58His face is closed, Marne.
00:45:59No, no, I don't stop .
00:46:00No, no.
00:46:01Go, no!
00:46:02The ostat��야!
00:46:03Track it!
00:46:06Well, hello.
00:46:07I just thought I warned you there's a funny-looking character hanging around the house.
00:46:09Nothing to worry about.
00:46:10If you see anything suspicious, just hop in the cupboard, you know?
00:46:13Yes.
00:46:39Anything wrong, Marsha?
00:46:40Oh, no, I don't think so, Mr. Topham.
00:46:43Hold your horses. I'll come and look.
00:46:45Come on, Texas.
00:46:59It's me, you fool!
00:47:01Police!
00:47:13Come on, Julie. Let's wait upstairs.
00:47:17Good evening, Mrs. Topham.
00:47:19Good evening, Mrs. Topham.
00:47:29Oh, how are you?
00:47:30Have you seen a piece of paper with a poem on it about Whittacorn?
00:47:33Whittacorn? I don't know.
00:47:37If you're looking for a drink, it's only wasted time.
00:47:40There's never any booze in this house.
00:47:43Come on.
00:47:53If you use an old cut-throat razor like I do,
00:47:56you wouldn't mess your face up like that.
00:48:03Goodbye.
00:48:04Good morning.
00:48:08Oh, good morning.
00:48:13Good morning.
00:48:14Good morning.
00:48:18Lovely day.
00:48:21Lovely weather.
00:48:24Lovely Green Gage Jam.
00:48:26Did you make it, Marjorie?
00:48:27No.
00:48:28Marta did.
00:48:30Wonderful.
00:48:31It's Green Gage Jam.
00:48:34I said Green Gage, didn't I?
00:48:37How's Charlie's aunt getting along?
00:48:39Must you be funny in the morning, Grandpa?
00:48:41Well, tonight's the address of the house, isn't it?
00:48:43No, it's Saturday, and it isn't Charlie's aunt.
00:48:45It's Miss Honeycroft's epic when the Vikings came to Dunmore.
00:48:49They'll be the only people who will come to us.
00:48:52Is Basil in it?
00:48:54Basil is a Viking.
00:48:55I didn't know he was a member.
00:48:57He and Marta joined the same evening.
00:48:59What is she, a Vikingess?
00:49:00She's the leading lady, and I'm her understudy.
00:49:04Oh, congratulations, my dear.
00:49:07Oh, Grandpa!
00:49:18No, I haven't finished yet.
00:49:20I'm sorry.
00:49:25A Viking.
00:49:26That sounds serious.
00:49:27Just a ticket, isn't it?
00:49:30It's very smart, sir.
00:49:31Very.
00:49:32I think I have my bono fitted with them.
00:49:34Very useful in the rush hour.
00:49:36If you take the fletch, I'll bring the app.
00:49:37Wouldn't mind having a go for this myself.
00:49:39Why don't you?
00:49:40Disqualified.
00:49:41Bad luck.
00:49:42Flying bomb?
00:49:43No, flying saucer.
00:49:44Teacup as well.
00:49:57You want a lift?
00:49:59Thank you, sir.
00:50:00I've just got to drop something on the vicar and then home.
00:50:01Yes, sir.
00:50:02I've got your costume in the back.
00:50:03Oh, I cannot wait to put it on.
00:50:04I bet it's lovely.
00:50:05I hope it is.
00:50:06I want it with a plunging neckline and a bodice that would fit me so.
00:50:10I'm sure you'll look lovely in it.
00:50:11Thank you, sir.
00:50:12What colour did you ask for?
00:50:13I hope it is black.
00:50:14My favourite colour.
00:50:15Yes, it's so colourful.
00:50:16Stop!
00:50:17Stop!
00:50:19A two-coloured horse, that is an omen.
00:50:21In my country, we have to take a look at the vicar and then home.
00:50:23Yes, sir.
00:50:24I've got your costume in the back.
00:50:25Oh, I cannot wait to put it on.
00:50:26I bet it's lovely.
00:50:27I hope it is.
00:50:28I want it with a plunging neckline and a bodice that would fit me so.
00:50:30I'm sure you'll look lovely in it.
00:50:31Thank you, sir.
00:50:32What colour did you ask for?
00:50:33I hope it is black.
00:50:34My favourite colour.
00:50:35It's so colourful.
00:50:36Stop!
00:50:37Stop!
00:50:39A two-coloured horse, that is an omen.
00:50:41In my country, we always close our eyes and wish before we see its tail.
00:50:45Quickly now, before it passes.
00:50:53Did your wish come true?
00:50:54No, no.
00:50:55The flinch I'll be disqualified.
00:50:56Oh, no!
00:51:03A flinch!
00:51:11Good afternoon.
00:51:12Have you broken down?
00:51:13Yes.
00:51:14In a way.
00:51:15Can I be of any assistance?
00:51:16No, no.
00:51:17It's her ignition.
00:51:18It's a bit too far advanced, I think.
00:51:19I can handle it.
00:51:20I hope so.
00:51:21Did you get the flinch?
00:51:22Yes, yes.
00:51:23Rather.
00:51:24Oh, how kind.
00:51:25Just put it inside the back door, will you?
00:51:26I'll put it in the larder when I get back from the vestry meeting.
00:51:31Goodbye.
00:51:32Goodbye.
00:51:33Goodbye.
00:51:34They saw us.
00:51:35Oh, no, they didn't.
00:51:36Well, if they did, I'm ready for it.
00:51:37Disqualified.
00:51:38No bacon, no house, and possibly no wife.
00:51:40Well, I'll tell them that it is an all-tungarian time.
00:51:42Well, I'll tell them that it is an all-tungarian time.
00:51:44I hope so.
00:51:45Did you get the flinch?
00:51:46Yes, yes.
00:51:47Rather.
00:51:48Oh, how kind.
00:51:49Just put it inside the back door, will you?
00:51:50Oh, no.
00:51:51Oh, no, they didn't.
00:51:52Well, if they did, I'm ready for it.
00:51:53Disqualified.
00:51:54No bacon, no house, and possibly no wife.
00:51:56Well, I'll tell them that it is an all-tungarian custom.
00:51:58The trouble is, she's not an old Hungarian.
00:52:00You really think they didn't see?
00:52:01I don't think so.
00:52:02The flinch.
00:52:03The flinch, it's gone!
00:52:04It must have fallen out.
00:52:05Oh.
00:52:06Oh.
00:52:07What?
00:52:08Oh.
00:52:09Oh, my God.
00:52:10Oh, my God.
00:52:11Oh, my God.
00:52:12Oh, my God.
00:52:13Oh, my God.
00:52:14Oh, my God.
00:52:15Oh.
00:52:16Oh, my God.
00:52:17Oh, my God.
00:52:18Oh, my God.
00:52:20Are you sure you haven't seen it?
00:52:21I told you, no.
00:52:23What are you going to do?
00:52:25Find another.
00:52:37Here.
00:52:38Where are you going with that?
00:52:40Oh, hello.
00:52:41Lovely afternoon.
00:52:42You know Marta, don't you?
00:52:43Afternoon, miss.
00:52:44Poor little fellow.
00:52:45We ran over him in the car.
00:52:46I think he sprained his ankle.
00:52:47Looks all right to me.
00:52:48Yes, that's because he's very brave.
00:52:49Now, I really think I want to take him to the hospital.
00:52:51To the vet.
00:52:52Looks all right.
00:52:53Let's see if he can run.
00:52:54Put him down, then.
00:52:59Poor little fellow.
00:53:00Let him go, then.
00:53:02Leave him go.
00:53:06There you are.
00:53:07See, that's all right.
00:53:09Thank you very much.
00:53:10Not at all.
00:53:11Now he must be after rehearsal.
00:53:12Good afternoon.
00:53:13The rehearsal.
00:53:14My goodness me.
00:53:15The rehearsal.
00:53:16No, no, Basil.
00:53:17No, no.
00:53:18You're meant to drink out of that, not blow.
00:53:20There's nothing in it.
00:53:21There will be, on the night.
00:53:23Cold tea.
00:53:24Now, try again.
00:53:31What's the matter?
00:53:32I got the giggles.
00:53:33I was just thinking what would happen if there was a tea in it and I blew down it.
00:53:39Give me a moment and I'll laugh it off.
00:53:42Now, come along.
00:53:43Be dignified, you warriors.
00:53:47A little left.
00:53:48The second Viking.
00:53:52No, left.
00:53:53Not right.
00:53:55That's right.
00:53:56Is it?
00:53:57I'm sorry.
00:53:59That isn't right.
00:54:00Move left.
00:54:02Where does she want me, ma'am?
00:54:03Right there, sir.
00:54:05If you don't know the way, ask a policeman.
00:54:10Lucy?
00:54:11Care for a nice pheasant, Mr. Topham?
00:54:14I can do with a pig or half a pig.
00:54:17Half a pig?
00:54:18That's difficult.
00:54:19You're telling me.
00:54:21All right.
00:54:22I'll see what I can do.
00:54:23It'll come dear, though.
00:54:24Now then, off we go.
00:54:25Basil.
00:54:26One, two, three.
00:54:27Begin.
00:54:29Full many-a-moons have waned, I trow, since first we set sail from...
00:54:40From famed Dunmo.
00:54:44Now, what do you think of this, my dear?
00:54:46You will look forward to every morn if you start your breakfast with wheatagorn.
00:54:49How's that, my dear?
00:54:50Oh, awful.
00:54:51No, no.
00:54:52It's rather good.
00:54:53It flows.
00:54:54The first prize is a sewing machine or a mowing machine.
00:54:57Both useful in their own way, do you know?
00:54:59Really, Grandpa's bad enough having the house full of the drama group in ten minutes.
00:55:02Yeah, but you do too much, my dear.
00:55:04I wonder where I get it from.
00:55:06Your mother.
00:55:07She was as restless as a cricket.
00:55:09I don't know why they call them that.
00:55:11I should have thought anything to do with the cricket was restful, wouldn't you?
00:55:14Yes, Grandpa.
00:55:16Now, listen to this, dear.
00:55:18If the maid is singing at the break of dawn, it means she's been guzzling wheatagorn.
00:55:22Is that any good?
00:55:23What, Grandpa?
00:55:24What, Grandpa?
00:55:25Margie, do you want a washing machine or not?
00:55:27No, thank you, Father.
00:55:28I use a sponge.
00:55:29Good night.
00:55:30Good night.
00:55:31Good night.
00:55:32Good night.
00:55:33Good night.
00:55:34Good night.
00:55:35Psst.
00:55:36Miss Martha.
00:55:37I've got a present for you.
00:55:38Oh, no, Mr Jenkins.
00:55:39Not again.
00:55:40Yeah.
00:55:41I happen to notice these coming along tonight.
00:55:43You should not shoot them.
00:55:44You'll get in trouble.
00:55:45Oh, go on.
00:55:46Stick it in your bag.
00:55:47Here, I'll...
00:55:48I'll shoot anything for you, Miss Martha.
00:55:50I'll shoot anything for you, Miss Martha.
00:55:53You should not shoot them.
00:55:54You'll get in trouble.
00:55:55Oh, go on.
00:55:56Stick it in your bag.
00:55:57Here.
00:55:58I'll shoot anything for you, Miss Martha.
00:56:01Lions, tigers, heliwets.
00:56:03Oh, oh, Mr Jenkins!
00:56:04Would you please stop this?
00:56:06Mr Jenkins, I don't...
00:56:07Mr Jenkins, if you're not too busy,
00:56:09I'd like to close the hall.
00:56:10Yeah.
00:56:11And Mr Jenkins,
00:56:12I take it that after this,
00:56:14you'll be withdrawing from the trial.
00:56:16Oh, thank you, Mr Grimes.
00:56:18Hello.
00:56:19Where are the rest of you?
00:56:20Terrible news.
00:56:21It's gone.
00:56:22Oh, thank you, Mr Grimes.
00:56:24Hello.
00:56:25Where are the rest of you?
00:56:26Terrible news.
00:56:27It's gone.
00:56:28Gone?
00:56:29It's gone.
00:56:30What's gone?
00:56:31The flitch.
00:56:32What?
00:56:33The flitch.
00:56:34The flitch of bacon.
00:56:35There's no trace of it.
00:56:36What was it like?
00:56:37You might have asked us round.
00:56:38Exactly.
00:56:39That's what everyone will say.
00:56:40The next thing, Hedworth will be summoned by the Ministry of Food.
00:56:43Oh, dear, I shall probably lose my cloth.
00:56:45Why, had you wrapped it in a cloth?
00:56:47I'm sure it will turn up.
00:56:48Have you reported it?
00:56:49No.
00:56:50No, not yet.
00:56:51Well, if you'd like to do so now, please use the telephone.
00:56:52No, no, thank you.
00:56:53You see, Grimes wanted me to keep it at the police station for safety and I refused.
00:56:58I was insistent that we kept it at the vicarage.
00:57:00When did you find that it was missing?
00:57:01After the rehearsal, Hedworth was so tired we went home for a glass of milk.
00:57:06But Fletcher disappeared.
00:57:07We've searched for it everywhere, high and low, but there's no trace of it.
00:57:08Well, there it is.
00:57:09But who could have stolen it?
00:57:10I don't know.
00:57:11I haven't the faintest idea.
00:57:12Perhaps the fairground people.
00:57:13I think not.
00:57:14I've always found them comparatively honest.
00:57:15It's terrible.
00:57:16I don't know what to do.
00:57:17We've got to save your bacon somehow, vicar.
00:57:18Please don't say anything to anybody about this, will you?
00:57:19No, of course not.
00:57:20I don't know what to do.
00:57:21I don't know what to do.
00:57:22I don't know what to do.
00:57:23I don't know what to do.
00:57:24I don't know what to do.
00:57:25I don't know what to do.
00:57:26I don't know what to do.
00:57:27I don't know what to do.
00:57:28We've got to save your bacon somehow, vicar.
00:57:33Please don't say anything to anybody about this, will you?
00:57:35No, of course not.
00:57:36You may rely on me.
00:57:38You won't say anything to anybody, will you?
00:57:40Rather not.
00:57:41It must be found.
00:57:42Oh, don't worry.
00:57:43I'll tell everyone I see to keep an eye out for it.
00:57:46No.
00:57:47Vicar, don't tell him.
00:57:48I'll get you another one.
00:57:49Where from?
00:57:50Don't worry.
00:57:51Leave it to me.
00:57:52Where did you put the flinch exactly?
00:57:54Well, you remember you told me to put it just inside the bag.
00:57:57door.
00:57:58Good evening, Sergeant.
00:57:59Good evening, Mr. Grimes.
00:58:00You'll know Miss Honeycroft, don't you?
00:58:01Miss Honeycroft.
00:58:02I've struck the Jenkins off.
00:58:04What are you talking about, Mr. Grimes?
00:58:06The flinch.
00:58:07You saw it.
00:58:08I shall say I did.
00:58:09Where?
00:58:10In the village door.
00:58:11Is it still there?
00:58:12Well, if by it you mean her.
00:58:14No, it's not.
00:58:16It's here.
00:58:18No, thank you.
00:58:19What are you talking about, Mr. Grimes?
00:58:22Jenkins.
00:58:23Kissing her against her will.
00:58:25Oh, never mind that.
00:58:27It's quite unimportant.
00:58:28Oh, where is Hedworth?
00:58:31Unimportant?
00:58:32Well, I'll be bloated.
00:58:34Hello, Mr. Grimes.
00:58:35Would you like a drink?
00:58:36Thanks, I will.
00:58:37Have one of these to you.
00:58:38Thanks.
00:58:39Well, here's to you, winner of the Dummo Flitch.
00:58:42Well, you're bound to win it now.
00:58:44You're the only entrant left.
00:58:45What about the Jenkins pair?
00:58:47Disqualified.
00:58:48You'd never believe it.
00:58:51I caught him red-handed.
00:58:53Kissing your mate.
00:59:07Ah, good evening.
00:59:08Fed up waiting for a drink?
00:59:09I don't blame you.
00:59:10Well, how did the rehearsals go?
00:59:12Oh, thank you very much.
00:59:14I'll shove those into the water once.
00:59:15Hang on to that, will you?
00:59:16I may not be Sherlock Holmes, but there's no...
00:59:18Lord, the local policeman.
00:59:19Police?
00:59:20Please do not call this police.
00:59:21Oh, rather not.
00:59:22He's such a bore he stops the traffic in this conversation.
00:59:25I wish to talk to Martha, please.
00:59:26That's a much better idea.
00:59:27Please let me talk to her.
00:59:29Well, I'm not stopping you.
00:59:30If you want to talk to Martha, talk to her.
00:59:32Every other man does.
00:59:33Well, that is the trouble.
00:59:34Always there are these other men.
00:59:36She told me I had no possessions, no ambition, no nothing.
00:59:40But now I have a farm in Austria.
00:59:42If she would come with me, we would be very happy on my farm.
00:59:45But no, these men.
00:59:46You're not a Danmo man.
00:59:48No.
00:59:49I'm Istvan.
00:59:50I'm from Hungary.
00:59:51Hungary, oh, most interesting.
00:59:53Did you ever run across Martha there?
00:59:54You ought to have a word with her.
00:59:56For two years we were betrothed.
00:59:58At the big Schloss where I was working on the farm.
01:00:00Hold on to that.
01:00:01Oh, a Schloss is, how you say, a castle?
01:00:04Yes, we've got a lot of them here.
01:00:06There's Windsor Schloss and Elephant Hill Schloss.
01:00:09Well, then at the big Schloss she was the kitchen maid.
01:00:11Would she marry me?
01:00:12It's extraordinary that you should ask me that.
01:00:14I was just going to ask you.
01:00:16She would not marry me.
01:00:18That's a pity.
01:00:19Her father beat her seven times.
01:00:21Seven.
01:00:22But it was no good she left.
01:00:23I followed her.
01:00:24I love her.
01:00:25And her cooking.
01:00:26It is wonderful.
01:00:27Her hollasle.
01:00:28I dream about it.
01:00:30Lots of people do round her.
01:00:32So I find where Martha is and so I get a job.
01:00:35With the circus I come here.
01:00:36Well, that was most enterprising.
01:00:38Oh, I have arranged a feast for Martha in my friend's caravan.
01:00:41He has a, how you say, a flitch of bacon.
01:00:44Really, yes.
01:00:45There seems to be a lot of them round her.
01:00:47Excuse me.
01:00:48I go to seek her in the kitchen, eh?
01:00:51Go and seek her in the kitchen.
01:00:53I very much doubt whether you find her in the kitchen.
01:01:04No, thank you.
01:01:05Of course I do.
01:01:06Of course I do.
01:01:07Of course I do.
01:01:08Of course I do.
01:01:09I didn't get it.
01:01:10I didn't get it, did you?
01:01:11No.
01:01:12Don't you think?
01:01:13Of course I have to do.
01:01:18The bishop should be told.
01:01:19Excuse me, Miss Honeycroft.
01:01:20The bishop should be told.
01:01:22Nonsense, Hedworth.
01:01:23If the flitch is lost, I shall see if the Topham's claim to it is lost too.
01:01:27What do you mean, my dear?
01:01:28I shall give evidence about Basil in the car.
01:01:31My dear, you can't do that.
01:01:32Can't I?
01:01:33We'll see about that.
01:01:34Rarely.
01:01:35Aubrey ought to know better at his age.
01:01:37Why don't you tell her to come out of there?
01:01:38Get really mad.
01:01:39No, I never lose my temper, Julie.
01:01:43I don't want any scenes.
01:01:45Well, I'm not going to do another thing.
01:01:46I'm going to fetch Marta.
01:01:52Julie, you have been lucky getting a treasure like Marta.
01:01:54Yes.
01:01:55What did you do before you found her?
01:01:56I used to get a drink at our own parties for a start.
01:01:58If I was the judge, I'd give the flitch to you.
01:02:00Oh, I'm not married.
01:02:02I'd say to that.
01:02:03Ah, here's the lucky husband.
01:02:05And there is the lucky wife.
01:02:10Hello, darling.
01:02:11Hello, sweetheart.
01:02:12Lucky devil's winning all that bacon.
01:02:15They haven't won it yet.
01:02:16But still, it's in the bag, Miss Honeycroft.
01:02:18So's the cat.
01:02:20Until somebody lets it out.
01:02:22Does anybody feel like a stuffed egg?
01:02:25Ah, there's no stuffed egg.
01:02:26Excuse me.
01:02:28I'm.
01:02:29Oh, I'm.
01:02:30Ah, just.
01:02:31And he's alone.
01:02:32That's just a stuffed egg.
01:02:33Oh, you are.
01:02:34Yeah.
01:02:35Oh, always.
01:02:36Oh, yes.
01:02:37Oh, my.
01:02:38Oh, my God, yes.
01:02:39Oh, my God, yes.
01:02:40Oh, my God, yes.
01:02:41Oh, my God.
01:02:43It's worth it.
01:02:45Oh, my God.
01:02:46Oh, my God.
01:02:47Oh, I could have all.
01:02:48No, my God.
01:02:49Oh, my God.
01:02:50Oh,'ve got a stuffed egg.
01:02:51After a flying start, eh, Harry Clot?
01:03:03Yes, indeed, Bishop.
01:03:05Excellent attendance.
01:03:08The hooplaft stalls are a good one this year.
01:03:10Crowded, isn't it?
01:03:14Oh, it's wonderful.
01:03:17And here is your prize.
01:03:19Men just like a change sometimes, that's all.
01:03:23I don't expect your marriage.
01:03:25I suppose it's the way she rolls her arse that gets them.
01:03:33Where is it?
01:03:34Outside, second on the left behind the road at Endrance.
01:03:37No, no, no, the flitch.
01:03:39You promised it.
01:03:39Now, are you getting one or are you not?
01:03:41I don't know.
01:03:41But you said you would.
01:03:42Yes, but it'll take time.
01:03:43Time there isn't any time.
01:03:45Be patient.
01:03:46Patient it.
01:03:47Leave Job to be patient in these vile circumstances.
01:03:49Yes, but he's not here, so do the best you can.
01:03:51No, Basil, it won't do.
01:03:52A promise is a promise.
01:03:54And a flitch is a flitch, and there isn't one.
01:03:55Oh, dear, I'm so afraid Rosabelle will insist on me calling her.
01:03:58No, call her anything you like, her chap.
01:04:00Oh, no, no, no.
01:04:00I mean, she'll insist on giving evidence.
01:04:02Oh, that's all right.
01:04:03She's got nothing on me.
01:04:04Well, she's got her eye on you, for one thing,
01:04:05and she has had for some time.
01:04:07Really?
01:04:07She never told me.
01:04:09She noticed something strange that afternoon your car broke down,
01:04:11and we drove up.
01:04:13Her eyesight's a great deal better than mine.
01:04:14She can't do that.
01:04:15Well, needs must when the devil drives.
01:04:17What a very jumpy little man.
01:04:19It must be nerves.
01:04:20Oh, my dear, it's his sister.
01:04:24Poor Honeycroft.
01:04:25He'll never get to Furman till he's shaken off that gorgon.
01:04:29Well, Hedworth, has the flitch turned up?
01:04:31No, my dear, no, not yet.
01:04:33In that case, I shall give evidence.
01:04:35My dear, I hardly think a scandal.
01:04:38Nonsense, Hedworth.
01:04:39I refuse to allow you to be the laughingstock of the diocese
01:04:42and under the bishop's very nose.
01:04:44Yes, but to start a new scandal is not very charitable.
01:04:47Charity begins at home.
01:04:48But what good will it do?
01:04:49Well, really, you're not very quick.
01:04:51If they're disqualified, we shan't need a flitch.
01:04:54Use your head, Hedworth.
01:04:56Come along, children.
01:04:57She's going to say that she saw me kissing, Marta.
01:05:02And were you?
01:05:04Father, don't keep asking awkward questions.
01:05:06You're my counsel.
01:05:07That's not the point.
01:05:08We must stop her giving evidence.
01:05:09How can we?
01:05:10I don't know, but there must be some way of stopping her going into court.
01:05:12You know, I simply can't go through with it.
01:05:14Courage, my boy, courage.
01:05:15Remember that Topham's were at Waterloo.
01:05:17Yes, well, I wish I were there now.
01:05:19The Dunlone Fitch, the Dunlone Fitch.
01:05:22Will the couple who are hidden to rise to come at once to the large marquee?
01:05:28Yes, well, I'm going.
01:05:29Going where?
01:05:30Abroad.
01:05:31Can't somebody stop her?
01:05:32If those don't worry, I'll take care of Rojavel.
01:05:34Don't forget, the Topham's were at Waterloo.
01:05:41Hey!
01:05:42Hey!
01:05:47I've never been on the big wheel before.
01:05:50God, this is going to be good.
01:05:52Before this court consisting of a judge, a counsel for the Baton, a counsel for the
01:06:11couple, and 12 good jurors and true, six good bachelors and six true spinsters, this
01:06:19trial commences.
01:06:19And now, it is my very great pleasure to take my seat as judge at the trial of this charming
01:06:27and connubial couple.
01:06:29I will now call upon counsel for the claimants, Mr. Aubrey Topham, to open his case by examining
01:06:35his clients.
01:06:38Play for time.
01:06:39Eh?
01:06:40Play for time!
01:06:41You are the son of Mr. and Mrs. Aubrey Topham.
01:06:51I believe so.
01:06:52Would you mind answering yes or no?
01:06:55Would you?
01:06:56And you reside at the house of Mr. and Mrs. Aubrey Topham?
01:07:01By inclination or necessity?
01:07:02Necessity.
01:07:03Now, am I right in saying that you, Basil Topham, residing in the grace and favour of your generous
01:07:09parents?
01:07:10Steady on, Father.
01:07:11Your generous parents married your present wife last year.
01:07:15That's right.
01:07:16And am I right in saying that from that day to this you have not quarrelled with her more
01:07:20than in the normal give and take of married people?
01:07:23Well, no, no, not more than that.
01:07:27Would you confirm that, Mrs. Topham?
01:07:29Well, we've, uh, we've neither of us been in hospital.
01:07:34May I have a picture for the herald, Miss Honeycroft?
01:07:37No, no.
01:07:38I got an appointment.
01:07:39And these boys have made me late all week.
01:07:41It won't take long if you'll just sit here.
01:07:42Oh, dear.
01:07:44Sit next to me.
01:07:47Now, watch for the birdie.
01:07:49Put your hands over the lens.
01:07:51You don't.
01:07:53Can you remember when and where you first met your wife?
01:07:58We were at school together.
01:08:00I remember that I was kept in one evening and when I was let out, I found that Julie had
01:08:04been waiting for me by the backyard gate with a tadpole and a jam pot.
01:08:09Yes.
01:08:10Proceed.
01:08:11She asked me if I'd like it and she said she was sorry I'd been kept in.
01:08:15And did you accept the offering?
01:08:17Took the tadpole, if that's what you mean.
01:08:19Where did you take it to?
01:08:20Back home.
01:08:22Put it in your bowler hat.
01:08:23And what happened to it after that?
01:08:26It went up to London the following morning.
01:08:28I saw it off.
01:08:29Or rather on.
01:08:32Mr. Topham, I find the question of the tadpoles is irrelevant.
01:08:36My lad.
01:08:38What has happened to this thing?
01:08:40Why doesn't it prove?
01:08:43Come there, Mick.
01:08:44Go on.
01:08:45Have you finished your examination, Mr. Topham?
01:08:49I'm afraid I have.
01:08:53Then I call on counsel for the bacon.
01:08:55I should like to open my case by calling a witness.
01:09:00Miss Rosabelle Honeycroft.
01:09:01Miss Rosabelle Honeycroft.
01:09:02Miss Rosabelle Honeycroft.
01:09:05Miss Rosabelle Honeycroft.
01:09:09Miss Rosabelle Honeycroft.
01:09:13I call for a postponement for this material witness.
01:09:16I protest.
01:09:24I second that.
01:09:26The court will now adjourn for ten minutes.
01:09:30Most extraordinary,
01:09:32Roosevelt seems to have vanished into thin air.
01:09:38Will you make this thing go up, please?
01:09:40I want to get out.
01:09:42It's stuck. We're working on it.
01:09:44How much for another half hour?
01:09:52You'll never get away with that. That's not a flitch.
01:09:54Oh, ain't it? No, it ain't.
01:09:56It's donkey.
01:09:58You show me the donkey that's got a flitch like that.
01:10:00I can't. That's right, you can't.
01:10:02I can't because it's dead. Look here.
01:10:04I don't like you. I don't like your flitch either.
01:10:06I'm telling you, this flitch ain't donkey.
01:10:08Do you want to make something of it, eh?
01:10:10I'm afraid I couldn't even if I wanted to.
01:10:12Come and fork out, you promise me.
01:10:14Hello, Sergeant Marne.
01:10:24Have you won the thing?
01:10:26No, they've adjourned to find Miss Honeycroft.
01:10:28She's up there.
01:10:30I say, well done, Grandpa.
01:10:32Have you got it?
01:10:33No, it wasn't any good. It was donkey.
01:10:34Donkeys don't have flitches.
01:10:36Does that matter, Father?
01:10:37Well, not to me. To the donkey, possibly.
01:10:38Are you looking for a flitch?
01:10:40Yes, Grandfather.
01:10:41Well, Ish-fan's got one.
01:10:42Who's Ish-fan?
01:10:43You know Ish-fan, don't you? He's always around the house.
01:10:45Who is Ish-fan, Grandfather?
01:10:47Well, he's in the circus. He's martyr's boyfriend.
01:10:50Martyr's what?
01:10:51Boyfriend.
01:10:52Here, what am I to do with her?
01:10:55You carry on, Grandfather. You're doing fine.
01:10:58Same again. How much?
01:11:00Well, it's a bit dodgy, you know.
01:11:02Cost you another knicker.
01:11:03Martyr, do you know a chap called Ish-fan?
01:11:05Yes.
01:11:06He's not good.
01:11:07He has not got the ambition.
01:11:09Who cares about that as long as he's got a flitch?
01:11:11Where is he?
01:11:12In his caravan, perhaps.
01:11:13Well, where is his caravan?
01:11:14I do not know.
01:11:15Look, come on.
01:11:16Oh.
01:11:19Attention, please, ladies and gentlemen.
01:11:21The flitch trial will be resumed in five minutes.
01:11:29I say, what a lovely smell. I bet it's big.
01:11:32It's a jog.
01:11:33Oh. Are there any more caravans around here?
01:11:35No. Only what you see's.
01:11:36Oh, thank you.
01:11:37Oi, here.
01:11:38Yeah?
01:11:39There's tiniest caravan. Always parks away.
01:11:41Been a light arse keeper.
01:11:42Thanks very much.
01:11:46Then may we come in.
01:11:49So you're the man who has stolen my girl.
01:11:51You know my son.
01:11:52What are you doing with my girl?
01:11:53What are you doing with my flitch?
01:11:55I'll kill you, curse, and then her.
01:12:01Quick, father. Come on.
01:12:04Excuse me, your chap.
01:12:09Ish-fan. Ish-fan.
01:12:13Martyr, at last you're alone.
01:12:15Martyr!
01:12:20Martyr!
01:12:22Oh, no!
01:12:27So, I said to the inspector, I may not be Sherlock Holmes, I said.
01:12:31But I do know when a donkey hasn't died naturally.
01:12:38Attention, attention.
01:12:39Mr. Topham, Mr. Basil Topham, please.
01:12:41The flitch trial is recommencing.
01:12:45Mrs. Basil Topham, please.
01:12:47Anthony Topham, I procedure.
01:12:50Mr. Basil Topham, I consider you trouble.
01:12:51Is Mr. Basil Topham coming, please.
01:12:57Mr. Basil Topham, please.
01:12:58Mr. Basiltopper, please. We're waiting.
01:13:22I don't care what you say. A deal's a deal and someone's got to pay.
01:13:25Well, I can't help it. I spent my last tin bob on him.
01:13:28Oh, you have, have you? Well, darn she comes, then.
01:13:34Now, the good damn man, that aunt, he'd break with the bank, no?
01:13:36Oh, did he? Clever chap.
01:13:38Now, why do you walk away with it?
01:13:40He's what I thought I had.
01:13:42Any sign of Miss Honeycroft here?
01:13:43I expect she'll be here any minute now.
01:13:45Well, we'll have to manage without her.
01:13:47You know, it's thirsty work, Miss.
01:13:48That's right. Now, run along, you boys.
01:13:59Oh, this is an outrage. I might have been there all night.
01:14:02Have you got half a crown?
01:14:03Half a crown? What did you know?
01:14:06Now, do your stuff.
01:14:09Oh, don't do that.
01:14:10All right, Bill, take him up again.
01:14:12Second child.
01:14:14Blimey, I don't know.
01:14:15You're a witness, Mr. Honeycroft.
01:14:17I have no witness, my lord.
01:14:24Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
01:14:26your verdict.
01:14:30Marta, come back to Ostera with me.
01:14:33I now have a farm and 100 pigs, please, oh, Marta.
01:14:38The fledge!
01:14:41Innocent, award the fledge!
01:14:45The winners of the Dumbo fledge are Basil and Julie Topham and number four, New Road Dumbo.
01:14:53Builder Stanley Grimes.
01:14:59If he have the bacon, then I keep my mouth shut.
01:15:01Which is it to be?
01:15:02It's fun!
01:15:06I now call upon council for the bacon to present the fledge.
01:15:09My lord, there is no...
01:15:12There is no couple to whom I would sooner present this much sought-after piece of bacon.
01:15:20Ethel, I found this on the way down here.
01:15:34It's for you, love.
01:15:36Oh, that!
01:15:38I shall remember last year to my dying day.
01:15:42But as Hedworth always says, good comes out of evil.
01:15:45And if it hadn't been for those interfering poppins,
01:15:48Hilary and I would never have won the fledge this year.
01:15:56Oh, listen to this, my darling.
01:15:58With Wheatacorn, his heart bewitched, and you will win the Dumbo fledge.
01:16:02Oh, beautiful!
01:16:03Give and take, then one day you'll make a heaven
01:16:08Just like Darby and Joe
01:16:14Just like Darby and Joe
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