- 3 months ago
Here We Go S03E07
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00First before 1995
00:05Everything smells weird in this house
00:12No, I'm sorry, but we're not stopping
00:15It's a medical emergency, Rachel
00:17No, we're already late
00:18If you want to go to the shops on the way
00:19Then spend less time in the toilet before we leave
00:21It's not going to the shops
00:23I need Imodium
00:25I'm not well
00:26It doesn't smell well, to be fair
00:28Thank you, Mum
00:28No, you really don't
00:30Hang on, what does that mean?
00:31Well, you've got that poorly dog smell
00:33It's not funny, Sam
00:35I'm febrile
00:36You're what?
00:37I have a fever, I'm freezing
00:39Hence the hot pot
00:40Please, can we stop on the high street, Rachel?
00:42No, no
00:43Oh, I actually want to pick up some food as well
00:45No, there's no time
00:46Amy, how far is this church?
00:48So I can't find it
00:49What's it called again, Granny?
00:50St Ival's
00:51It's the big one near the S.O. garage
00:54St Ival's?
00:55What?
00:56St Ival makes cream, Mum
00:57Oh, does he?
00:58Well, the company does, yeah
01:00Surely St Ival isn't a real saint
01:02They'll be staggered if he is
01:03Well, who am I thinking about then?
01:05St Michael, maybe?
01:06No, that's Marks and Spence
01:07Which S.O. garage?
01:08St Nigel
01:09Oh, my God
01:09As if there's a St Nigel
01:10Which S.O. garage, Sue?
01:11The one with the pumps
01:13And the big lorry sometimes
01:15Ridiculous
01:16Ridiculous description, Mum
01:18Oh, okay
01:19I think I've found a St Michael's
01:20Buy an S.O. garage
01:21Fantastic
01:22It's just left up here, Mum
01:23Oh, can we go via a chemist, Amy?
01:25No!
01:26The service starts in 15 minutes
01:27Oh, it is near
01:28It's really near the high street, actually
01:30Huh?
01:30No
01:31Oh, just nip in
01:32Or do you want me to get diarrhoea during the christening?
01:35Well, you'd have to go in the font
01:36Exactly
01:37No, I wouldn't go in the font
01:38That's ridiculous
01:39I'd just do it in my trousers
01:40Not in the toilets?
01:42Or the toilets, yeah
01:43But even so
01:44It would be very disruptive at the service
01:46Doesn't she look slamming?
01:49Just extraordinary, actually
01:51You'd never know
01:52She'd just had a baby, would you, Paul?
01:54I know
01:55Huh?
01:56Wow
01:56Oh, yeah, no, four
01:57Four?
01:58Four?
01:58Four?
01:59What?
01:59I mean, wow
02:00Wow, I meant to say wow
02:01Yeah
02:01I wasn't concentrating
02:02You look amazing
02:03Right
02:04And is this all from yoga?
02:05Oh, no, yoga's wank
02:07Yeah
02:07This is all down to Katie, my PT
02:09Mm-hmm
02:10What?
02:11Unusual surname
02:12So, Dean's new girlfriend, Katie, is a personal trainer
02:14Oh, okay, wow
02:15Dean's cock
02:16Wow
02:17Yeah
02:18You should totally try her age, I swear, Dan
02:21She has worked wonders on my pelvic floor, ain't she, babe?
02:25Just a bit
02:26She could strangle a cat down there
02:27I can
02:28Wow, well done
02:30Thank you
02:31Meow
02:31Yeah, no, maybe I should, you know
02:33I mean, I have been feeling a bit stiff recently
02:35Yeah, you're just getting old, love
02:37Great
02:37You know, that happens
02:39Oh, oh, hell
02:41Oh, what happened?
02:42I've split the neck on my hotbot trying to pull the stopper out
02:45Oh, no
02:46Dang
02:47Dang?
02:48Yeah, dang
02:49I should have to replace it now
02:50I love this hotbot
02:51Please, don't call it a hotbot
02:53No
02:53Maybe it's a sign
02:54Sign of what?
02:56To get an electric blanket
02:57No, no, no way, Jose
02:58No way
02:59Why?
02:59Because that's what elderly people do
03:01Like complain in restaurants
03:03And like Michael Ball
03:04You love Michael Ball
03:05Mmm, we'll be picking our cemetery plots next
03:08Well, no, we're just going the same one
03:10Save a bit of money
03:10No, I don't want to think about it
03:12You see, this is why I'm stiff
03:13Because you and your hotbot force me to, oh, God, live
03:18I can't get up
03:19Live like, oh, thank you
03:20Live like a pentonym
03:21You OK?
03:22I can fix your hotbot pot
03:24Really, Mum?
03:24Yeah
03:25Can you?
03:25I've got a roll of duct tape in me bag, look
03:27Why have you got duct tape, Sue?
03:29Duct tape
03:30Oh, yeah
03:30Well, in case I need to, you know
03:33Kidnap someone?
03:33Splinters, fix a brolly
03:35Just general taping
03:36And I've got a torch pen
03:38Is duct tape water protein?
03:40Duct tape
03:41Don't know
03:41Of course it is
03:42That's why it's called duct tape
03:44It's not called duct tape
03:46It's not
03:47There it is
03:47It's called duct tape
03:49You have to pronounce both of the T's
03:51Duct tape
03:52Right
03:52Is a brand name
03:54As fascinating as this is
03:56I have got to go and meet Katie
03:58So, we're looking after Atlas again, are we?
04:00Yeah
04:00I am, yeah
04:01I want to get as much of him as I can before my big trip
04:06Oh, well, actually, Paolo, on the Atlas front
04:08We did want to ask
04:09Would you be interested in being one of the Godfathers
04:11At the Christmas day?
04:12Oh
04:13Really?
04:14Yeah, well, right, she's got my bar
04:16Yeah
04:17Oh, my Godfathers
04:19I've never been asked to be a Godfather before
04:22Yeah
04:23Well, this is wondrous news, wondrous
04:25All right
04:26I promise I won't let you down, guys
04:27Okay
04:28Or you, Guy
04:29That is a Godfather guarantee
04:31Yeah
04:31I just have to work on my Godfather impression
04:33Oh
04:34Godfathers!
04:35Shh!
04:36I forgot you're going to wake up
04:37I'll go, yeah
04:38I'll go
04:39Weren't you got any keys?
04:41Why haven't you got any friends?
04:42Okay, nice to see you, too
04:44Hi, Graeme
04:45It's G
04:46Not Graeme
04:47Okay, cool
04:48Don't take the piss out of my pizza, you dirty rat
04:52Okay
04:53What are you doing?
04:54Huh?
04:55Oh, nothing
04:56Hi, Graeme
04:57Hi, it's G now
04:58Hello, hi, yes, sorry
04:59I was just doing a Marlon Brando impression from the Godfather
05:01It doesn't matter
05:02Don't take the piss out of my pizza, that's not in the film
05:05Well, that's sort of it, isn't it?
05:07No?
05:08No
05:09Sorry, Graeme, that's not a guitar in there, is there?
05:11No
05:12Wow, Detective Jessup has done it again
05:14G, yeah, why?
05:15Well, just because the baby's asleep over there
05:17You can't shred your accent here, mate
05:19Well, we want to rehearse, my keyboard's upstairs
05:22Okay
05:23Why else would I come over?
05:24To use the Wi-Fi, to get your washing done, to have a bath
05:28I find quite a few reasons, Amy
05:30Yeah, why can't you just get your keyboard and take it back to your flat?
05:32Because it's heavy
05:34Oh
05:35And Maya's...
05:36Well, we're trying to give each other space while she packs up
05:39Aww
05:40Yeah, so anyway, we really need to practise
05:42Aw, you're that bad, are you?
05:44We... thanks
05:45We've got Bedford Battle of Bands next month
05:48Woah
05:49B-B-O-T-B
05:50No worries, that's still going
05:51Yeah, and we're playing the Lamb and Flag next week
05:53Oh, I know, I can't wait
05:55You're coming
05:57Yeah, I am a good look charm G, I saw the Beatles when they were still tiny
06:02Mm-hmm
06:03And look how well they did
06:04Yeah
06:05Very, very well
06:06Did you?
06:07Let me tell you
06:08I didn't know that
06:09Yeah, in 1961, I was only 15, I gave George Harrison a cigarette
06:14Wow
06:15One of those
06:16Harrison actually died of lung cancer
06:18So...
06:19Mm-hmm
06:20Yeah, but that wasn't Sue's fault, was it?
06:22Yeah
06:23No, you didn't give him his first cigarette, did you?
06:25LAUGHTER
06:28Or did you?
06:29I don't know
06:30I mean, he didn't have any of his own or a lighter, so I suppose it's possible
06:36Uh-uh
06:37Oh my God
06:38It killed George
06:39Oh God
06:40I mean, I'm sure that's not strictly true
06:44Graham, gee, you know, legally speaking
06:46Can't prove anything
06:47No
06:48He must have smoked before that
06:49Yeah
06:50That's all anyone did in those days
06:52Yeah
06:53Oh, babe, babe
06:54That's on Sunday the 14th
06:55Right
06:56So we can go to BBOTB after the Christina do with The George
06:58make a night of it
06:59BUB
07:04Would Atlas like that, or?
07:05Yeah
07:06He might actually
07:07Would he?OK
07:08He really likes White Noise
07:09white noise. Yeah. Oh, yeah, well, that's not actually what we play.
07:12I've got BBOTP. I haven't been there for about 15 years.
07:15I cannot wait to go back. Just when you think you've left the Mafia for good...
07:19Oh, do it again. ..they ask you back to the Mafia.
07:22I mean, that's not even close, Dad. Well, it's sort of a general gist, isn't it?
07:25Yeah, well... Hang on, Paul. Huh?
07:27You have been christened, right? Because to be a godfather,
07:31you have to have been christened. Er... I don't know.
07:33You had me christened, didn't you, Mum? Er, hang on, let me think.
07:37Er, we definitely had you circumcised. Oh, well, I'm aware of that.
07:41Thank you. Thank you for telling Terry and G that!
07:43I don't care. No, we're christened. Erm, I think...
07:47No. Oh. Really? Why?
07:50Because I don't believe in God. Hmm.
07:52But you do believe in ghosts, though, don't you see? Well, that's different.
07:56Ghosts and angels I've got no problem with. Hmm.
07:59So, you believe in angels, but you don't believe in God?
08:03Well, who are they working for, then? Well, no-one. They're freelance.
08:06I'm sorry, Paul, but...
08:08Father Damien is well-stripped about this stuff, so...
08:12I mean, can't you just tell Father Damien that I'm christened anyway?
08:16Well, no, because Sue says you haven't been, so...
08:20Yeah, but she can...
08:22..you know... What?
08:23..lie. No. No, I'm not doing that. No.
08:27Well, why not? No-one will know.
08:29God will. You don't believe in God!
08:32Exactly! So I'm already in this bad book, don't I?
08:35Um, I've got a feeling that Dean hasn't been christened either.
08:37No. No.
08:38Well, he's out and old, then. Oh.
08:40Oh, really? Yeah.
08:41Just get christened now, as an adult.
08:44Oh! Well...
08:45Well, you can do that.
08:47Yeah, I mean, it's a lot of faff when you're old.
08:49Like, it's like a chicken pox, you know what I mean?
08:50Yeah. And you want to get it when you're a kid.
08:52It just depends on how much you want to be a godfather, really.
08:54Big. A big amount. Big amount. Please.
08:57You see? There's nowhere to park.
09:00It's all double yellow.
09:02Just bang on your hazards and park where you like, Rachel.
09:05That's what I do.
09:06Yes, well, you shouldn't, Sue.
09:07I hate it when people do that.
09:09Oh, not the multi-storey, Rachel. There's no time.
09:12Yes, it will work out quicker.
09:13Let's go. Let's go.
09:15I'll have to get out, Mum. OK.
09:19Has anyone got a pen? Oh, yeah, something? I have.
09:22Oh, great. Get out of the car, Mum. Come on, come on. Go, go, go.
09:24No, I'm not getting... Just get out of the car.
09:26No, no, I don't need to.
09:28It won't work, Mum.
09:30Gah! Oh, well done, Mum.
09:33OK, quickly, quickly, quickly, please, Rach.
09:34Thank you. There you go.
09:36How are you going to get the ticket?
09:38OK, I'll just get out of the car.
09:40Right.
09:42Oh! Ah!
09:43You all right?
09:45Got it. Let's go.
09:49Just hold it in, Paul. Yes, thank you, Mum.
09:52Great advice.
09:53Are you all right, Rachel?
09:54No!
09:55I think I must have twisted my knee when reaching for the ticket.
09:57Ow! Oh, gosh.
09:59Sorry. Hello.
10:01Hi, hi, hi.
10:03Can we have some Imodium? Please.
10:05And a knee support, please, as quickly as possible.
10:09Is that for the same problem? No. No!
10:11No, the Imodium's for him, and I need the knee support.
10:14I've been over-squatting recently, but, well, we both have.
10:16Chill out!
10:18We don't sell knee supports.
10:20Oh, well, any kind of...
10:21Well, strapping, something to...
10:23..make it less comfortable. Please.
10:25Where are your toilets?
10:27Oh, no, toilets are stuff only.
10:29Well, this is an emergency.
10:31Yeah, sorry.
10:32Oh, sorry, as in, you'd rather me evacuate my bowels...
10:35No, don't do that.
10:36...in your chemist. No, don't do that.
10:37No.
10:38Do you sell Adderall nappies?
10:40No, Mum. No?
10:41No! No!
10:43We're not going to do that.
10:44I don't want to.
10:45Ignore her.
10:46That's a pub across the road.
10:47Oh, no, I hate going to a pub toilet when I'm not a patron.
10:52Come on, just hold it in.
10:53I want these ones, Mum.
10:55Right.
10:56Oh, God.
10:57Sorry.
10:58Wow!
11:00She can stay like that for hours.
11:01Really? Easy.
11:02I could sleep like this.
11:04Amy, could you turn it down up there, please?
11:06Sometimes I think Katie's left the flat.
11:08She's just squatting me on the sofa.
11:10Oh, my goodness. That has happened, yeah.
11:12Sorry, our daughter's just rehearsing upstairs.
11:14And that's good for you, is it?
11:15Well, let me put it this way, Rachel.
11:17Yeah?
11:17This is great.
11:19How old do you think I am?
11:20Ooh.
11:2236?
11:24Be honest. 34.
11:25Come off it.
11:25Last year, I got ID'd at the cinema going to see Godzilla vs Kong 2.
11:30Really? That's a 12, isn't it?
11:32Exactly.
11:33Someone thought you were 11.
11:35Or under.
11:36The other day, I went to get a train ticket and the guy in the booth goes.
11:39Oh, I love this one.
11:40Why aren't you using your young person's rail card?
11:42And I was like, because I'm 40.
11:45I'm 40.
11:46I know, it's mad, isn't it?
11:48Yeah.
11:49Wow, what's this?
11:50Look, look at this.
11:51OK.
11:52This is a doggy piddle.
11:53OK.
11:54You do this every single day for 20 minutes, you'll live past 100.
11:59OK, wow.
12:00Quite hard to prove that.
12:01Drop a squat for me, Rachel.
12:03Oh, my gosh.
12:04Yeah.
12:05What, right now?
12:06Well, yeah, if I'm going to take you on, I need to see what I'm dealing with.
12:07OK.
12:08Go on, Rach.
12:09Breathe.
12:10Breathe.
12:11Breathe.
12:12Yeah, all right.
12:13Oh!
12:14Oh, my God!
12:15What was that?
12:16Was that me?
12:17That was awful.
12:18All right.
12:19She clicks.
12:20She does clicks.
12:21She needs a bath.
12:22Bit stiff, bit stiff.
12:23Bit old.
12:24Oh, no, that's OK.
12:25That's OK.
12:26That's OK.
12:28Now, just engage your core for me.
12:29My what?
12:30Your core.
12:32Engage.
12:33Am I doing it?
12:34No.
12:35No, I'm not.
12:36I wasn't.
12:37Here's your whole example.
12:38Oh, thanks, bub.
12:39Hey, Dean.
12:40Ooh.
12:41I think you're punching above your weight there.
12:43We both are.
12:45Yeah, I'm not sure it works like that.
12:47And hold.
12:48So, how did you two meet?
12:50Oh.
12:51So, I was in Costa Coffee.
12:54Mm-hm.
12:55Katie was sitting at another table.
12:56Yeah.
12:57And when she got up to leave,
12:58Yeah.
12:59I noticed she'd left her phone.
13:00Right.
13:01So, you returned it to her?
13:02No, I stole it.
13:03Then, later, the phone rings.
13:05I answer it.
13:06So, I found it.
13:07Arranged to meet up with her.
13:08You know, collect the reward.
13:09OK.
13:10Then we got on really well.
13:11It's romantic, isn't it?
13:12Almost.
13:13Yeah.
13:14So, you got a reward?
13:16Well, I mean, Katie's my reward, really.
13:18But...
13:19Yeah.
13:2080 pounds.
13:21Don't tell her the part where I stole the phone.
13:22Oh, I won't.
13:23I won't.
13:24OK.
13:25Oh!
13:26We're good for getting dunked on Sunday.
13:28Er, dunked?
13:29Yeah.
13:30Baptised.
13:31Father Damien's agreed to do that for us.
13:32Dunk the doughnuts.
13:33Good to Godfather!
13:34Oh, well done, Dean!
13:35Yeah!
13:36Ha-ha!
13:37Oh, hiya, love.
13:38How's it going?
13:39Hi, Granny.
13:40Come forward to your big gig.
13:41Oh, yeah.
13:42Nervous, but excited.
13:44You were terrific at the lamb and flag.
13:47Thanks, you said.
13:48A few times.
13:49Er, I actually...
13:51About that.
13:52Gee worries that, erm, you know, while we're still quite unknown,
13:57don't have many fans.
13:59Well, any fans, really.
14:00You've got me!
14:01Exactly.
14:02That's...
14:03Yeah, he's just wondering if you could maybe...
14:06I'm sorry to ask you, but...
14:08..not come to our gigs?
14:11For a bit.
14:12Just until you can blend in more with other people.
14:16Is Gee still angry with me about killing George Harrison?
14:20Oh, no.
14:21No, it's not that.
14:22It's the...
14:23The dancing?
14:24Erm...
14:26Well, just the whole thing.
14:28The optics, you know.
14:30Of course.
14:32Thanks.
14:33Sorry.
14:34Who killed George Harrison, then?
14:36Er...
14:37Oh, me, maybe.
14:38Unless he started smoking before 1961.
14:41Hmm.
14:42Interesting.
14:43Oh, my God!
14:44Why?
14:45You like the Beatles, do you?
14:46Well, I like Thomas the Tank Engine,
14:48and I know Ringo Starr does the voice for that, so...
14:50So, no, then.
14:51Go!
14:52Lower!
14:53Go low.
14:54Go high.
14:55I think this is as low as it goes, actually, Casey.
14:57OK.
15:00Oh!
15:01Oh!
15:02Oh!
15:03Just head straight for the toilets.
15:04It's all about confidence.
15:05Well, I'm not confident, am I?
15:07This is why I find the modern world generally horrible.
15:09This is the George.
15:10This is where the Christmas goo is happening later.
15:11Is it?
15:12Yeah.
15:13Oh, good!
15:14Oh!
15:15Oh!
15:16Oh!
15:17It's the ladies.
15:18Oh!
15:19Oh!
15:20Oh!
15:21Oh!
15:22Oh!
15:23Toilets are for customers only, bro.
15:24Yeah, I know, I know, I know, I know.
15:25So...
15:26And it doesn't matter, because I am a customer.
15:28I'm coming to the post-christening due here later, so...
15:30OK.
15:31So, you can use the toilet later, when you are a customer.
15:33OK.
15:34Well, I can just buy something now, if that's...
15:35Sure.
15:36What can I get you, bro?
15:37Um, do you have Horlicks?
15:39Don't get Horlicks.
15:40A pint of Guinness, please.
15:43A pint?
15:44Why are you getting a pint?
15:45Just get a half.
15:46It's too late now, Sam.
15:48I've already ordered it.
15:49Go on.
15:50And, bro...
15:51Bro, can you please refill my hot bot for me while I'm in the gents?
15:56My hot water bottle.
15:57Thank you so much.
15:58Oh, my God.
15:59Sure.
16:00And I'll have a shot of vodka.
16:01Really?
16:02Yeah.
16:03Just need something to, um...
16:04I'm shedding myself a bit.
16:05Oh!
16:06Oh!
16:07I've got the Imodium in me bag.
16:08No, no.
16:09I mean, I'm nervous about the gig later.
16:12Oh, I see.
16:13And could I have some ice, please?
16:15Sure, like ice water or...?
16:17Yes, but without the water.
16:19Er, my knees are very sore.
16:20Er, I've been working out, I guess too much.
16:22Just, you know, stretch them out.
16:23Yeah, I'll just stretch them out.
16:24I'll squat.
16:25Yes.
16:26You should be careful, Mum.
16:27Look, don't worry.
16:29You'll be amazing.
16:30I can't wait to see it.
16:32You, er...
16:33No, I mean, Sammy's film of it.
16:35Afterwards.
16:36No, don't worry.
16:37I, er...
16:38I won't be there.
16:39Where's the ice lady?
16:41No, I'm here.
16:42I was squatting.
16:43Which hasn't helped at all.
16:46Can I order some nuggets, please?
16:48Dino!
16:49Go on, Dean.
16:50Dunk the hunk!
16:51Oh, well done, Dean.
16:52Well done, Dean.
16:53Well done.
16:54Incredible.
16:55Incredible.
16:56Go on, son.
16:57Look at him go.
16:58I baptise you in the name of the Father.
16:59God.
17:00The Son.
17:01Jesus.
17:02And the Holy Spirit.
17:03No idea.
17:04Oh, my God.
17:05Yay!
17:06Well done!
17:07Woo!
17:08Dino!
17:09Well done.
17:10Peace be with you, yeah.
17:11Wet teaser competition, anyone?
17:13Oh, it's lovely here, isn't it?
17:15Yeah.
17:16It's really nice, Mum.
17:18Just a shame about the sewage company.
17:21Yeah.
17:22Sarah, what do you mean?
17:25Over 4,000 hours.
17:27Discharging raw faeces last year, apparently.
17:30Okay, Paul, you ready?
17:32Uh, yeah, sorry, Father.
17:34Where was this, Mum?
17:36Wasn't here, was it?
17:37So, this is a full immersion baptism.
17:39The best thing is to hold on to me and I'll guide you in and out of the water.
17:43Well, okay.
17:44It can mess you up, by the way, you know, the squatting.
17:46Like, stuff can suddenly, like, ping or crunch, like, in your back and your knees.
17:50So, like, if you want to get some straps or sport tape now...
17:53Sport tape?
17:54Oh, dear.
17:55No, I think I'll be okay, thank you.
17:57You know, I'm naturally quite a flexible person.
18:00Um, and Katie says my technique is excellent, so...
18:03Um...
18:04You got this, Paolo!
18:06Oh, here he goes.
18:07Keep your mouth closed, Paul!
18:09I baptise you in the name of the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit.
18:14Yay!
18:15Okay, um...
18:16Yeah!
18:17That didn't work.
18:18Huh?
18:19Your hands, they didn't go under.
18:20Right, well, can I just pop it in now?
18:22We have to do it again.
18:23What, the whole thing?
18:24Full immersion.
18:25Some of it went up my nose!
18:26Oh, my God.
18:27I baptise you in the name of the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit.
18:31Oh, hang on.
18:32Woo!
18:33Paul!
18:34Woo!
18:35You have to keep your hands down.
18:36Full immersion, Paul.
18:37Sorry.
18:38Hands in.
18:39I did.
18:40We'd like to do it again.
18:41I went under.
18:42I baptise you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.
18:45Oh, God.
18:46Mum, get it away!
18:47That's not going to work.
18:48Your hands, Paul!
18:49You need to keep your hands in.
18:50All right, just give us a chance, all right?
18:52I'll get there!
18:53I did make it look easy, to be fair.
18:54Let's try again!
18:55Can we tie him up?
18:57Right.
18:58Off we go, then.
18:59Hurry up, Paul!
19:01Yes, I know.
19:03I've just downed a pint of Guinness, Mum.
19:06OK?
19:07And Rach is still...
19:08Come on, Rach!
19:09It was you that made us stop in the first place,
19:13and it was Sam who ordered food.
19:16Yeah, I can't believe you ordered nuggets, mate.
19:18What?
19:19My nuggets came quicker than your nuggets?
19:21I wish mine were nuggets.
19:23It was more like McFlurry.
19:25Oh!
19:26Are you all right, Rachael, love?
19:29No, Sue.
19:30It's my knees.
19:31They're rubbing.
19:32I just need something to sort of hold them.
19:36Oh!
19:37I know!
19:38Amy?
19:39Hmm?
19:40Come and help.
19:42That's it now.
19:43How's that, Rachael, love?
19:44Yeah, yeah.
19:45Pretty good, actually, mobility-wise.
19:47Not sure what it does to my outfit exactly, but...
19:50You look a bit like Robocop.
19:51Yeah.
19:52Yeah.
19:53You know it's starting, like, right now.
19:55Oh, God!
19:56Oh!
19:57Let's go!
19:58Let's go!
19:59Let's go, Joe!
20:00When's the actual water bit?
20:01Well, can you drag it out?
20:02Can you sing another hymn?
20:03No, no, don't do that!
20:04Do not do that!
20:05Robin is suggesting that Katie and Chelsen
20:08step in as godparents!
20:09No!
20:10No way!
20:11We will be there!
20:12No way, Robin!
20:13We will be there!
20:14All right?
20:15That is a godparent promise!
20:16Just park closer to the machine, Mum!
20:18No!
20:19I tried, Amy!
20:20I can do it!
20:21Just get out the car, Mum!
20:22No!
20:23I can!
20:24Rachel!
20:25Rachel!
20:26Oh!
20:27I heard that!
20:28Oh, God!
20:29Oh, Rachel!
20:30Oh, look, I've got my back!
20:31Oh, Mum!
20:32Yeah.
20:33Oh, I've got my back!
20:34We're really late, by the way.
20:35Yeah!
20:36Come on, Rach!
20:37I'm already awake!
20:38There's a toilet in here!
20:39Shh!
20:40Oh!
20:41Oh!
20:42Oh!
20:43Oh!
20:44Hello!
20:45Everyone!
20:46Oh!
20:47Oh!
20:48Oh!
20:49Oh!
20:50Oh!
20:51Sorry!
20:52Oh!
20:53Oh!
20:54Oh!
20:55Oh!
20:56Oh!
20:57Oh!
20:58Oh!
20:59Sorry!
21:02Hi!
21:03Hey!
21:04Oh, babe!
21:05Have you been shopping in TK Maxx again?
21:07TK Maxx, no!
21:08It's tape!
21:09It's tape!
21:10The service started 20 minutes ago.
21:1220 minutes ago.
21:13Yeah, well, great.
21:14I'm very ill.
21:15Hence the hotpot.
21:16Amy, can you sort us out a couple of chairs?
21:18Could you please, Amy?
21:19Right.
21:20Well, you shouldn't come to church if you're sick.
21:21Well, you shouldn't dunk people in faecal water.
21:23I mean, why do it in a river at all?
21:25Dad, chill.
21:26Jesus was baptised in the River Jordan.
21:28Okay.
21:29Well, I'm guessing Anglian water didn't illegally dump sewage
21:32into that beforehand.
21:34Oh!
21:35And that doesn't explain why she's wrapped in...
21:36Is that duct tape?
21:37Yeah.
21:38It is duct tape.
21:39Yes.
21:40That's what I said.
21:41No, it's not.
21:42I got a bit carried away.
21:44I've been doing too many squats.
21:47Not possible.
21:48It is possible, Katie.
21:49I can't bend my knees.
21:50Sit down, Mom.
21:52I've got the tin, man.
21:53That's a robocop.
21:54Anyone silver, basically.
21:55Can I continue with the baptism now?
21:57Yeah, sorry.
21:58I've just got to nip to the loo quickly, very quickly.
21:59What?
22:00I've just downed a pint of Guinness.
22:01Legend.
22:02Nope!
22:03No time.
22:04If you can't stand by the front as a good parent,
22:06I'm afraid you'll have to sit it out.
22:08Okay, fine.
22:09Forget it.
22:10Sorry, Katie.
22:11Sorry, Gelson.
22:12I'm ready.
22:13Righto.
22:14I didn't want to do it anyway.
22:16Oh, my God.
22:17No, it's all right.
22:18I just can't.
22:19I'll just tip you out.
22:20Just tip it a bit.
22:21Will your legs hold?
22:23Parents and godparents, is it your wish for Atlas Bruce
22:25to be baptised in the faith of the church,
22:27which you've all professed with you?
22:28Yes, sir.
22:29Big time.
22:30Atlas Bruce, I baptise you in the name of the Father,
22:34the Son and the...
22:35Whoa, Dad.
22:37Oh, no.
22:39What's he doing?
22:41Stop it.
22:42What?
22:43The...
22:44Oh, Paul.
22:45I said we should have got you some nappies.
22:49Oh, gross.
22:50Oh, my God.
22:51What is it?
22:52Dad.
22:53What is it?
22:54Do you seriously not even know you're doing this?
22:55It's just strides, mate.
22:56Huh?
22:57Oh, my God.
22:58I'm so sorry.
22:59Oh!
23:00No!
23:01Oh!
23:02It's my hot bot.
23:03Oh.
23:04It's my hot bot.
23:05It's leaking.
23:06It's not urine.
23:07The duct tape has lost its adhesion,
23:08so it's leaking.
23:09I've not wet myself.
23:10Well, you have.
23:11No, I haven't.
23:12No, no.
23:13It's fine.
23:14I'm fine.
23:15Carry on, please.
23:16Oh, gosh, no.
23:17Hang on.
23:18That's...
23:19That's buckled.
23:20Oh, God.
23:21Oh, God.
23:22It's wet.
23:23It's wet.
23:24Sliding through the urine.
23:25It's not urine.
23:27It's not urine.
23:28It's not urine.
23:29It smells like urine.
23:31It's not urine.
23:32This isn't a great look at all.
23:33I'm so sorry.
23:34Carry on.
23:35I baptise you in the name of the Father, Son, and the...
23:38It's not urine.
23:39Godparents in, then.
23:40Just cut out the trousers.
23:41I'm trying to.
23:42I'm trying to.
23:43I'm trying to.
23:44Atlas hates Dean.
23:45Can you just do this all the time?
23:46Everyone say babies.
23:47Sue?
23:48Babies.
23:49Dean thought you might like to see a photo.
23:51Oh, right.
23:52Hang on.
23:53It's not a willy one, is it?
23:55Because I wouldn't like to see that.
23:57What?
23:58Oh, it's George Harrison from 1960.
24:01Smoking.
24:02Look.
24:03Oh!
24:04Oh, Gelson!
24:05Oh, thank the Lord!
24:07Are you all right?
24:08Yeah.
24:09I didn't kill George Harrison.
24:13Cool.
24:14Do you want any more pictures of Long Island iced tea?
24:16Hooray!
24:17We...
24:18Oh!
24:19Actually, no, no, we can't.
24:20Sorry, everyone, just a quick announcement.
24:23It is now, ladies and gentlemen, time to drain your drinks and your bladders
24:26and head over to bogeys.
24:28Bogeys!
24:29For Atlas' very first BBOTB bed for Battle of the Bands.
24:33Yay!
24:34Where our very own Amy Jessup will be performing!
24:38Oh, oh, oh.
24:39Oh, oh.
24:40Oh, God.
24:41Battle of the Bands.
24:42Okay.
24:43Okay.
24:44Good luck.
24:45Go on in.
24:46Yeah.
24:47Thanks.
24:48What are you doing, ma'am?
24:49You're not coming in?
24:50No, no.
24:51I'll wait out here.
24:52It's a bit loud for me.
24:54What, here?
24:55You're not going to be lonely?
24:56Oh, no, no.
24:57Look.
24:58I've got me lonely planet book.
25:00Okay.
25:01All right.
25:02It's in there.
25:04Go get them, Amy.
25:06Really?
25:07Yeah.
25:13Pretty good, yeah?
25:14I don't like it.
25:16Give it up for, um, Cold Sick.
25:21See you, Cold Sick.
25:22Yeah, Cold Sick.
25:23Decent, lads.
25:24Decent.
25:25Next up, we have the G-Hypothesis.
25:29Yeah!
25:30Yeah!
25:31Woo-hoo!
25:32Good luck.
25:33All right.
25:34What?
25:35How come you're here?
25:36Well, I'm not dead, Sam.
25:37I'm just not going out with Amy anymore.
25:40Oh, yeah, of course.
25:41Yeah, and I put up with a lot of terrible rehearsals,
25:43so I'd like to see the end product.
25:45And, you know, I missed you guys, so.
25:47Nice.
25:48Oh, sorry.
25:49My God.
25:50I mean, look at that.
25:51Yeah.
25:52I cannot believe she's still squatting.
25:54Mm.
25:55Mm.
25:56You know, if that's what it takes to stay looking young,
25:58then you can shove it up your core.
26:03Yeah, look, I'm sorry if I make you feel old, Rach.
26:06Older.
26:07With my hot bot and my horlicks.
26:10Of course you don't.
26:11Is that horlicks to realise you're drinking horlicks?
26:13Yeah, I need it to settle my tummy.
26:15OK.
26:16Well, at least I'm not actually incontinent.
26:18Yeah.
26:19Ha.
26:20I will be.
26:21Ha.
26:24You know, I'm not scared of getting old.
26:26Hmm.
26:27As long as I get to do it with you.
26:29Hmm.
26:34Ah, my back.
26:35You all right?
26:36Yeah, I'm not really.
26:37We'll have a bath.
26:38Yeah.
26:39We'll have a bath later.
26:40OK, Bedford, let me hear it.
26:42Woo!
26:44My name's Gee.
26:45This is Amy.
26:46Welcome to the Gee Hypothesis.
26:48One.
26:49Two.
26:50Three.
26:51Sorry, one sec.
26:52What are you doing?
26:53No, it's...
26:54I just have to...
26:55Be back, be back.
26:56Whoa!
26:57She'll be right back.
26:58Sorry about this.
26:59What's...
27:00She's just doing a...
27:01Doing a splash, isn't it?
27:02Where are you going?
27:04Amy?
27:12No!
27:13Oh!
27:14Here she is!
27:15Oh, yes, please!
27:16Where have you been?
27:17It's a rabbit center.
27:18Yeah, yeah.
27:19God's sake.
27:20Sorry, I just wanted to, um...
27:22This is my granny, everyone.
27:23Yay!
27:24She's the coolest person I know, and she's met the Beatles, and...
27:27Beatles!
27:28She has.
27:29Killed her arm.
27:30Yeah, I just...
27:31I really wanted her to be here for this, so...
27:33Amy, I love you.
27:36And you, Graham.
27:37It's Gee.
27:38It's Gee, no.
27:39Oh!
27:40Hey, Maya.
27:42Thanks for coming.
27:43Aww!
27:44Aww!
27:45Oh, Maya!
27:46Oh, I didn't know you were gonna be here!
27:48I was laughing!
27:49Alright, alright, let's hurry up.
27:50Come on.
27:51Okay, here we go!
27:52One!
27:53Two!
27:54One!
27:55Two!
27:56Three!
27:57Four!
27:58Running in the city of empty smiles.
28:00Machine TV.
28:02A tear upon the face of a robot child.
28:06Machine TV.
28:07Machine TV.
28:08Emoji in the place of a mother's smile.
28:11Machine TV.
28:12Machine TV.
28:13Machine TV.
28:14Can you look beyond your screen for a little while?
28:17Machine TV.
28:18Machine TV.
28:19Ooh!
28:20Ooh!
28:21Ah!
28:22Machine TV.
28:23Machine TV.
28:24Machine TV.
28:25Machine TV.
28:29Machine TV.
28:30Machine TV.
Recommended
28:33
|
Up next
28:48
29:07
27:31
29:19
27:31
28:58
29:14
29:06
15:01
28:26
44:55
29:15
44:13
29:03
34:00
16:59
28:26
29:04
58:38
24:10
Be the first to comment