- 5 months ago
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00:30Ah, you've made it.
00:34Rod, it's good.
00:35Well done, my son.
00:38You've got a bloody nerve you have, Bill.
00:40Phoning me up at home and demanding I come down here to pick you up.
00:43What could I do, Rodney?
00:46What could I...
00:48Listen, look, I've got the Vauxhall Velox outside, haven't I, eh?
00:51And I've had a few, you know what I mean, a few drinky poos.
00:54And I thought to myself, well, I could get a little old minicab.
00:57And then I thought to myself, no, no, man, what is more impressive?
01:01It's more impressive if you get your driver to come round and drive you home in your Vauxhall Velox.
01:07Er, Vauxhall Velox.
01:09What do you mean impressive, eh?
01:10Who are you trying to impress?
01:11Shh!
01:13Contact.
01:14Rodney, contact.
01:15New man in the area, stone rich, looking for business opportunities.
01:23We could earn out of this, Rodney, my little brother.
01:27Del, what you fail to realise is when you phoned, I was in the flat with a friend.
01:32Well, why didn't you bring him with you?
01:34It wasn't a he.
01:35Well, what was it then?
01:38Have you been up to noughties, Rodney?
01:41No.
01:42Just had a feeling something was going to develop.
01:44Develop?
01:45You've been playing with my Polaroid again, haven't you, eh?
01:47No.
01:49I'll just let go of course, Derek.
01:51All right, no rush.
01:53Vimont, my own mucker.
01:55Who?
01:56Vimont.
01:57Vimont Malik.
01:58Vimont Malik.
01:59My contact.
02:02Say no more.
02:07She, she said she can't come now because she's way in the postman.
02:11Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
02:13Here, do you fancy a nightcap, Vimont?
02:15And a nice little pub that does late tastings, eh?
02:21Thought you'd given me the slip, did you, Vimont?
02:25Why don't you go away and leave me alone?
02:28I have no quarrel with you, my friend.
02:32It's the pigs behind Malik that I wish to see.
02:37Friend of yours, is it, Vimont?
02:39He's no one's friend.
02:42Listen, John.
02:43I don't know what this Barney is all about and I don't want to know.
02:46So why don't you chaps get out of the way before someone gets a smack in the ear?
02:51All right?
02:52Please.
02:54Don't threaten me with violence, my friend.
02:56My colleague here is a second Dan in karate.
03:02And I'm a black belt in origami.
03:05Get out of the way.
03:08Watch him, Dill.
03:25Watch his carry-tary, mate.
03:26Watch your bloody carry-tary in a minute, Ronnie.
03:28Just shut up, will you?
03:29Police.
03:43Rodney, you and Vimont, in the car, quick.
03:45Right, let's go.
03:46Well, it's been very pleasant meeting you both.
03:51Have a nice evening, won't you?
03:53My friend, it's not good to part in such circumstances.
03:59Could we talk?
04:01I've done all the talking I wanted to.
04:03Good night, each.
04:10Rodney, I didn't mean drive off.
04:13What a plonker.
04:19Well, on second thoughts, I quite fancy a nice little chat.
04:23Perhaps you could drop me off home after.
04:29Oh, oh dear.
04:30Come on, me old mate.
04:32Come on.
04:33You'll be, you'll be all right.
04:35You'll be all right.
04:36Here, what happened?
04:44Yeah, John, that is twice, all right?
04:51Oh, I think your brother has arrived, Mr. Trotter.
04:59Oh, yeah, yeah.
05:00Could you excuse me a minute, Mr. Rahm?
05:02Excuse me.
05:03Rodney.
05:04Dale!
05:05Are you all right, son?
05:06I thought you was in bother.
05:07Oh, that's why it's taken you an hour and a half to get here, is it?
05:09Didn't Grandad tell you that I'd telephoned?
05:11Oh, yeah, he told me.
05:12Dale boy's been captured by the Indians, he said.
05:15I didn't know where to phone the police or the Texas Rangers.
05:18When you were so worried about your brother, you know,
05:20you were so worried about me.
05:22How come it's taken you till 20 to 1 in the morning to come to me rescue?
05:25Because your telephone message lacked something in clarity, didn't it?
05:27You didn't tell Grandad which Indian restaurant you was in.
05:31I've been crashing through the doors of every curry house
05:33and takeaway from Battersea Bridge to Collierswood Tube Station.
05:36I can now leap out of that Vauxhall Velick's Dukes of Hazard fashion,
05:39make a chip party and say,
05:40get stuffed in Urdu.
05:41I forgive you, Rodney.
05:44Oh, that's nice.
05:45All right, then.
05:45So, there's going to be trouble, is there?
05:48No, no, put the spoon down.
05:51Go for that.
05:52All right.
05:53Come on.
05:54Uh, Rodney, I would like you to meet Mr. Rahm.
05:57He owns this restaurant.
05:59Of course, you know odd job, don't you?
06:00Well, nice restaurant you've got here, Mr. Rahm.
06:05Very, uh...
06:06Indian.
06:07Yeah, Indian.
06:09Sit down, sit down.
06:10I was just telling your brother how well I've done since I came from Britain.
06:14I now own 18 of these restaurants altogether.
06:18I also own a lot of plan.
06:19Yeah, yeah.
06:20Odd Job's got a couple of acres and all, hasn't he?
06:24Yes.
06:26Thanks.
06:27How are you doing, Rodney?
06:28You are.
06:29I'm telling you.
06:31Now, if I got into my car at nine o'clock in the morning,
06:34it would take me up to two in the afternoon to drive around my land.
06:38Yeah?
06:39We had a car like that once, hey?
06:42What?
06:43All right, don't matter.
06:44So, Mr. Rahm, you and this, uh, Vimel,
06:46you've been having a bit of a nut and a downer then, have you?
06:49Don't mention that name at this table.
06:51It will sour the food.
06:53Well, what's it all about, then?
06:54I'll tell you what it's all about, Mr. Trotter.
06:57It's about truth.
06:58It's about righteousness.
07:00But above all, it's about justice.
07:03Vimel, that pig's behind has something that's rightfully mine.
07:10You see, our families have been engaged in a vendetta for many, many years.
07:15It goes right back to the days of the old empire.
07:18He means a British empire, not a Cuban.
07:20I know.
07:21I know that.
07:21I know that.
07:23Pray continue.
07:24Now, my family fought against the British, whereas the Mollick's family supported them.
07:30When the conquest of Mother India was finally complete, the British Raj decided to reward the Mollick's loyalty by giving them my family's land.
07:42What?
07:42You mean they just took it off your family?
07:45That's correct.
07:46They destroyed the home.
07:48They plundered the family's temple, and then they sold the land.
07:51Sure.
07:52The Mollicks have built a business empire with the proceeds.
07:55Yeah, couldn't you write to That's Life?
08:00To That's Life.
08:01Yeah.
08:02But this happened a century ago, Mr Trotter.
08:05If Lord Krishna himself couldn't help us, I really don't think Esther Ransom would stand my chance.
08:10No, no, that's right.
08:11I was just a fool.
08:12That was...
08:12Oi!
08:13Give off.
08:13Vimal Mollick has in his possession the one single item that remains of my birthright.
08:21It's a simple porcelain statuette of Kuerra.
08:25Er, you know of Kuerra?
08:27Oh, yeah.
08:31You don't know who Kuerra is?
08:33Yes, I do.
08:35All right, then tell us.
08:38What?
08:40Who is he?
08:42Who?
08:43Kuerra.
08:44Oh, well, er, he was...
08:48All right, I don't know.
08:49There you are.
08:49See what I mean, Mr Rhymes?
08:50He's got two O-levels, and he thinks he's Bambergascoyne's best.
08:53All right, mastermind.
08:55Who is he, then?
08:57Kuerra was one of India's premier wicket-keepers.
09:03You, Burke.
09:05Kuerra is the Hindu god of wealth from the second aspect of the Trimurti, the Hindu trinity.
09:10Oh, yeah.
09:11Oh, that Kuerra.
09:12Oh, yeah.
09:13Got you now.
09:13Yeah, yeah.
09:14There's two of them.
09:15In worldly terms, the statuette is of little value.
09:19But in religious and sentimental terms, it's precious to me, and I want it back.
09:24It's mine by right.
09:25I'm a rich man, Mr Trotter.
09:28I shouldn't have to stoop to the kind of intimidation you've witnessed tonight.
09:32I'm prepared to buy it back from him and Molly.
09:36I would pay £4,000.
09:43£4,000?
09:46Phew.
09:47Well, why don't you just go and make him an offer?
09:49Oh, it's impossible.
09:50It's this wretched caste system, you see.
09:52He belongs to the high caste, and I belong to the low caste.
09:56No, no, don't put yourself down.
09:56We cannot meet, talk, or communicate in any manner.
10:01So, you see, my friends, I'm up a gum tree without a paddle.
10:06Seems to me, Mr Ronald, what you need is a mutual friend, you know.
10:09Someone who can talk to the both of you, you know, act as a sort of go-between.
10:13Perhaps you and your brother.
10:16Oh, us?
10:18What?
10:19I suppose we could.
10:21I mean, come on.
10:22Why didn't we think of that, Rodney?
10:24I think one of us already did, then.
10:26If you helped me to reclaim the statue,
10:29I don't know how I'd ever reward you.
10:32Well, I've always fancied one of them video recorders.
10:35But no, no, par de bar.
10:37Par de bar.
10:39We'll go and see this Mr Vimal tomorrow.
10:42Um, £4,000, you said, right?
10:45Right.
10:46Oh, but I must make one thing quite clear.
10:50I don't trust this man Vimal Malik.
10:53You see, he comes from a long line of swindlers.
10:56I won't part with a single penny until I have the statuette safely in my hands.
11:04Don't you worry.
11:05Don't worry, Mr Rom.
11:06Me and Vimal, we're like that.
11:10Good job that we didn't call the police tonight.
11:12No!
11:12What happened?
11:20I'm surprised at you, Derek.
11:22And you also, Rodney.
11:23How could you share a meal with that, that gutter dog?
11:27I thought you were my friends.
11:28We are your friends, Vimal, my old mucker.
11:31Just trust me, will you?
11:32Trust me.
11:34You see, this Mr Rom, the gutter dog,
11:37Um, well, he told us all about the little misunderstanding
11:41that your two families have been having for the last hundred years or so.
11:45He also mentioned something about the statue of some god or another.
11:50A cuvera, the god of wealth.
11:52Ah, that's him.
11:52That's the boy.
11:53Yeah.
11:53Well, yeah.
11:55Well, you know.
11:56Um, well, without beating around a bush,
12:01Um, you know, I mean, well, you know.
12:05To cut a long story short.
12:08Um, well, not to put too fine a point on it.
12:13He wants to buy it off you.
12:14He wants to buy it from me?
12:22He must have gone mad.
12:23Or he's been eating too many of his own curries.
12:26Buy it from me, indeed.
12:28I wouldn't sell it to him if he offered me a million pounds.
12:32How much did he offer?
12:33Purely out of curiosity, you understand.
12:35Two thousand pounds.
12:36Two thousand?
12:37I thought Mr Rom said...
12:38Yeah, a thousand pounds.
12:39That is right, Rodney.
12:40But I persuaded him to double it.
12:42Two thousand pounds.
12:44No, no, no.
12:44I can't sell it to him.
12:46Mm, two thousand pounds.
12:47Then more my old mucker.
12:48You know, not be sneezed at it, is it, eh?
12:51I will not deny that I'm tempted, Derek.
12:53I thought of selling the statue once before.
12:56The most I was offered was one hundred and fifty pounds.
12:59Oh, look, Vimon.
13:01You see, I get the impression that you're not quite as rich and successful as you told me you were last night at the Chamber of Trade Bash.
13:08I mean, take a look at this place.
13:11It's oddly the Ritz, is it, eh?
13:13More like the Nets.
13:16I will admit I have suffered some misfortunes in my business dealings of late.
13:21Son, two grand on the hip would come in dead handy, eh?
13:24Two thousand pounds would come in dead handy, as you say.
13:28But I can't communicate with him.
13:30I'm of a high caste.
13:31He's a low caste.
13:32But you don't have to communicate with him, Vimon, my old mucker.
13:35That's where me and Rodders come in, you see.
13:37We're acting as the go-betweens.
13:39Even so, I cannot accept his offer.
13:42You see, it would be like betraying my family.
13:45The statue was left to me by my father.
13:47You wouldn't understand what that means, would you?
13:49Oh, yes, yes, we would.
13:51Wouldn't we, Rodney?
13:52We would, though.
13:52Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah.
13:53Our late mother, well, she's dead now.
13:59She left us this family heirloom.
14:01It was this Victorian globe.
14:06It meant the world to us.
14:10He said it meant the world to us.
14:13Yeah, but there came the time when we fell upon stony ground.
14:17We fell upon stony ground, did we?
14:18Yes, we fell upon stony ground.
14:19And the only thing we had of any value was this Victorian globe that we cherished.
14:25You sold it?
14:27Well, no, no, no, I raffled it down a betting shop.
14:29But, of course, you understand the sense of loss.
14:31Well, not really, no, because by some stroke of fortune, Del had the winning ticket.
14:38I think it was God or something.
14:41You think I should sell it to him, Derek?
14:42Yes, of course I do, Vimon, my old mucker.
14:45I mean, what is it?
14:46It's just an ancient piece of old religious pottery.
14:49And with £2,000, wisely invested, I mean, in a couple of years, you could replace it with, uh, um, who knows, uh, what, Capo Del Monte.
14:59Yeah.
15:00And personally.
15:02Anyway, I'm sorry, I've got to tell you this, but I think that statue is cursed.
15:07Cursed?
15:08Oh, leave it out, Del.
15:09Do not underestimate the powers of darkness, Rodney.
15:12I mean, for a God of wealth, he ain't done Vimon no favours, has he, eh?
15:16I'm not a superstitious man, Derek, but I'm a businessman and a realist.
15:21I have decided to accept his offer.
15:23Well, you know it makes sense, Vimon.
15:27I'll go and fetch the statue.
15:28Yeah.
15:28Good man.
15:33Now, just what...
15:34You'll excuse me, won't you?
15:34Oh, certainly, yes.
15:35Now, just what is your game, Del?
15:39Rahm offered £4,000.
15:40How come you're only offering two?
15:42Slip of the tongue, Rodney.
15:43Ah, so when he comes back, you won't mind me telling him the truth?
15:45No, don't you do that.
15:47Otherwise, you think I'm trying to con him.
15:49You are trying to con him.
15:50No man is an island, Rodney.
15:52I know that, Del.
15:53What I'm on about is the...
15:54What's that supposed to mean?
15:57What it mean...
15:58What it...
15:59Look.
15:59The French have a saying, Rodney.
16:02Bully buoys mon ami.
16:04Bully buoys mon ami.
16:06That means fish stew, my friend.
16:09Need I say more?
16:10Now, don't try and fog me off with your stupid French phrases.
16:13You're trying to con him out of £2,000.
16:15We're going to get lumbered, Del.
16:17How?
16:18All right.
16:19Say, Rahm and Vimmel meet and discuss the deal.
16:21That's the beauty of it.
16:22Rahm and Vimmel cannot meet because of the wonderful caste system.
16:26It's Christmas come early for us.
16:28And anyway, if it wasn't for kind-hearted people like you and me
16:31willing to act as go-betweens,
16:32Vimmel would end up with nothing.
16:33And as it is, £2,000 is better than to kick up the bot from Bobby Charlton, isn't it, eh?
16:38It's moral.
16:39It's free enterprise.
16:41It's illegal, then.
16:42All right, so it's against the law and all.
16:44But look, you and I can earn £1,000 apiece out of this.
16:47It's fraud.
16:49Are you in?
16:50Yeah, all right.
16:51All right.
16:57Ah.
16:58Ah, oh, well, this is it.
17:00Is it, Vimmel, my old mucker?
17:01Oh, yeah.
17:04Lovely.
17:05Mm.
17:05Oh, that is lovely, that.
17:06Mm.
17:07Mm.
17:07Wonderful workmanship.
17:09Of course, I'm a Ming fan myself, you know.
17:11Oh, yeah.
17:12He made some wonderful stuff, didn't he, that Ming?
17:14Yeah.
17:14He went and died when he did, didn't he?
17:16Eh?
17:17Ming was a dynasty, Derek.
17:18I don't care what he was of him.
17:20Well, he made a smashing vase.
17:22Anyway, look, we'll pop this round to Mr. Rahm
17:24and bring you back your £2,000 post-aced,
17:27as they say in ancient Rome, all right?
17:29No, no, no, Derek.
17:30This does not leave my side until his money's on the table.
17:34Eh?
17:34No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
17:36No, sorry, look, you don't understand, you see.
17:39Because he said that you won't get a penny
17:41until he has that statue safely in his hands, all right?
17:44I don't care what he said, Derek.
17:46I do not trust the man.
17:48He comes from a long line of cheats.
17:50You bring me his money first,
17:52then you can take him the statue.
17:55No, but you see...
17:56No, you see, he said...
17:58He said, bring me the statue,
18:00and then you can have the money.
18:02I don't care what he said, Derek.
18:04You don't care what he said, Derek.
18:05Yes, I heard what he said.
18:07I'll leave Rodney as a deposit.
18:09Eh?
18:10What else can I do?
18:12I mean, look, he won't let that go
18:14until he gets the money,
18:14and he won't have the money until he gets the...
18:16Oh, Gordon Bennett.
18:18This is classic.
18:20This is, isn't it, eh?
18:21It's the bacon and the egg situation all over again.
18:24It's the chicken and the egg, then.
18:25We haven't got time to discuss food, Rodney.
18:27Talk to him, Derek.
18:29Persuade him to submit to my terms.
18:31After all, you have influence over him.
18:33You have already persuaded him
18:35to double his offer from 1,000 to 2,000 pounds.
18:38Yeah, well, mm, all right, all right, mm.
18:41All right, then, I'll see what I can do, then, shall I?
18:43Yeah.
18:43Well, um...
18:45You know, I'll, er...
18:46I'll get back to you, all right?
18:48You know, you, er...
18:49All right?
18:49Stay loose, okay?
18:52Cool.
18:53Now, don't you worry, Wimmel.
18:54Don't worry.
18:55I mean, me and old Rahm...
18:57I mean, we're like that.
18:58We're like...
18:58We're like...
18:59We're like that.
19:00Yeah.
19:00Yeah, thanks.
19:02Come on.
19:06What are we going to do now?
19:07Just forget the old thing.
19:08What do you mean, forget the old thing?
19:10How can we forget the old thing?
19:112,000 pounds up for grabs,
19:12and you say forget it?
19:13No, no, there's got to be another way round it.
19:15There isn't.
19:16Look, Rahm won't pay a penny
19:17till he's got the statuette in his hands,
19:19and Wimmel won't let the statuette go
19:20till he's got Rahm's money.
19:22Yeah.
19:22Cheers.
19:24Yeah, well, what he thinks is Rahm's money.
19:27What you on about now?
19:28Well, let's say, just for instance,
19:31that we had 2,000 pounds lying around at home
19:34doing nothing in particular.
19:36Oh, just mooching about?
19:37Yeah, you know, kicking its heels,
19:38that sort of thing.
19:39And let's say that we gave Wimmel that 2,000 pounds, right,
19:44and we pretended that we'd just collected it
19:46from Mr Rahm.
19:47Well, Wimmel, he wouldn't know any better, would he, eh?
19:49So, thinking that he'd won the battle,
19:52and as happy as a sandboy,
19:53he'd hand over the statuette,
19:55which we would then whip round to Mr Rahm
19:58who, also thinking that he'd won the battle,
20:01and being equally chuffed as a sandboy,
20:04would hand over to us 4,000 lovely smaccaroonios.
20:10We would get on our bike,
20:11leaving them to play sandcastles.
20:13Eh?
20:15Brilliant, isn't it, eh?
20:16Yeah.
20:17There's only one problem I can see, Dil.
20:19How the hell do we get 2,000 pounds?
20:22You always bring little details up, don't you, eh?
20:25You get it from a bank.
20:27What, rob it?
20:28Well, I don't...
20:28Oi!
20:29No, no, no, no, we'll borrow it from a bank.
20:31This is guilt-edged security, innit?
20:33Dil, you can't stroll into a bank
20:34and ask for a loan to help you pull off a con trick.
20:37Besides, we haven't got a bank account.
20:39Oh, well,
20:40it's got to be another way of raising the money.
20:42I mean, it's just got to be.
20:43Here, we're general traders, ain't we?
20:49Yeah.
20:50Well, why don't we start trading, generally?
20:52I mean, we could flog all our stock that we got in the garage,
20:55couldn't we?
20:56We could sell the Deep Freeze, the Vauxhall Velox.
20:58Three-wheel van?
20:59You're jesting.
21:00They'd want a tenant to take that away.
21:02No, we could flog Grandad's telly.
21:04We could flog, er...
21:05Here, my jewellery.
21:07That'd bring in enough.
21:08I mean, it's 27 carat.
21:10I thought it was 9 carat.
21:11That was when I was buying.
21:12Now I'm selling.
21:14We could sell that leather coat.
21:16You're not talking about my leather coat, are you?
21:18No, no, I'm talking about...
21:19Have you got a leather coat?
21:20Oh, well, knock that one out and all, Rodney.
21:21Yeah, that's a good idea.
21:23Come on, Bill.
21:23We'll never raise two grand.
21:25We can, Rodney.
21:26You can do anything if you want it hard enough.
21:29We can do it, Rodney.
21:31We can do it.
21:33Yeah.
21:34Yeah.
21:35Come on, then.
21:35Come on.
21:43We can do it, Rodney.
22:27Well, thanks a lot. It's Tempest Fugit, then, eh?
22:56Where's your watch, Derek?
22:57Oh, it's at the Mender's. I broke it last night, playing, you know, volleyball.
23:02I thought you were right-handed.
23:04Me? No, no, no, no. I'm ambiguous.
23:12Hey, brothers! What about that, my son?
23:17Here, I...
23:18Good afternoon, gentlemen.
23:44A table for two?
23:45Ah, no, thank you.
23:46No, thank you.
23:47We'd like to see Mr Rahm.
23:49Mr Rahm?
23:49The owner.
23:50The owner?
23:51Terrible echo in here, isn't there, Rodney, eh?
23:54We'd like to speak to the owner, Mr Rahm.
23:56The owner, Mr Rahm.
23:58There it goes again.
23:59What's the matter with it?
24:00No, no, listen, listen.
24:01We would like to talk to the proprietor of this restaurant, right?
24:07I am the proprietor of this restaurant.
24:09No, no, no.
24:10You don't.
24:10You don't.
24:11We want to see the real owner, right?
24:14I am the real owner.
24:16All right, all right, all right, listen, just wait, hang on.
24:19Just watch my lips, all right?
24:21Look, where is Mr Rahm?
24:24Look, I don't know any Mr Bloody Rahm, so will you please leave?
24:28You drunks always come here causing trouble.
24:30Drunk? We're not drunks, are we?
24:31Look, I was having a couple of meals here quite recently.
24:35You must remember me.
24:37I'm sorry.
24:38You don't look alike to me.
24:39All right, what are you talking about?
24:42We all look alike.
24:43What's the matter with him?
24:44No, he's making it up.
24:45Look, look, look.
24:46My brother, right, was in here dining with a couple of Indian gentlemen, right?
24:53One was sort of large, large and aggressive, right?
24:57Big.
24:58One was smaller.
25:00That's what?
25:01Well, he's smaller than that.
25:02Why don't you get down there?
25:03That being more business-like.
25:06You had a beard.
25:07Beard.
25:07You had a beard.
25:08Beard, look.
25:09Oh, that Mr Rahm.
25:10Ah, yes.
25:12I know who you're talking about now.
25:13Oh, no.
25:14Oh, no.
25:15Shh, chico.
25:15He's the one who gave me a bouncy check.
25:18And a short while ago, I went to the address, which is written on the back.
25:22He's scarpered.
25:23We're in three weeks' rent.
25:26Oh, boy.
25:27No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
25:29It's a mistake.
25:31It's got to be a mistake.
25:32I mean, he told me he owned this restaurant.
25:34He told me he owned 18 of them, in fact.
25:36Maybe he was fibbing.
25:40Fibbing?
25:41Maybe he was fibbing?
25:43I've just given him 2,000 pounds for this on a strength of him fibbing.
25:482,000 pounds?
25:50But why?
25:50You can get them in Portobello Road for 17 pounds each.
25:58It's amazing what you can save if you shop around.
26:05I've got a nosebleed coming, Rodney.
26:07He tried to tell me that the statue was cursed.
26:16You know, he told me that he thought Quetta was a wicked man.
26:25Let's see.
26:26Now we've done Cardiff, Bristol, Southampton, and now North and South London.
26:31Where to next?
26:32Oh, to Birmingham, then Manchester, then Newcastle, even maybe Liverpool.
26:39In fact, anywhere where there are people who think they can explore the religious bigotry
26:43of two stupid immigrants, who will be rich, my friend, very rich.
26:48I'll drink to that.
26:49Me old fucker.
26:50No sign of him, all?
27:16No.
27:17Packed his bags and had it weighing his toes five minutes after we'd left.
27:21As Macbeth said to Hamlet in mid-summer night's dream,
27:26we've been done up like a couple of kippers.
27:29Right, let's go to the police.
27:30Oh, yeah, that's a good idea, that is.
27:32Oh, that's marvellous.
27:33We'd give them a good laugh down there, couldn't we, eh?
27:35But just imagine it.
27:36Trotter brothers, conned out of two grand.
27:38Be all over the manor in no time.
27:41We'd never be able to hold our heads up in court again.
27:45I don't know how people like Vimble and his mate can sleep at night.
27:48Honest, I don't.
27:50Lost everything.
27:52Never coats, Vauxhall Velocs, Grandad's telly.
27:56Hey, I've just remembered something.
27:58Grandad was renting that telly.
28:00Oh, tell me.
28:04Come on, let's get something to eat.
28:06I always feel emotionally peckish when I've been gutted.
28:09Well, that's a curry house down the road, Del.
28:14No, only joking, Del boy.
28:16Del!
28:16No, only joking, Del!
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