00:00We are a polyamorous triad.
00:02Me and Emily, we met in 2010.
00:05Almost three years ago, we met Ally,
00:07and we've been together now for two years.
00:09She is the stepmother to my oldest daughter,
00:12and then now we have our new baby.
00:14Ally is her biological mother.
00:16She got pregnant so fast.
00:18It was a shock.
00:20I don't want them to add this part in.
00:22It's okay. It's real.
00:24It's so nice out here today.
00:30We are a polyamorous triad.
00:34Me and Emily, we met in 2010.
00:37We've been together ever since.
00:39We've been married for five years.
00:40We had already, I guess you could say,
00:42had encounters with other women,
00:44but they weren't looking for a relationship at that time.
00:47But we realized that we didn't want to keep inviting
00:50different people into our life like that.
00:52So we ended up, I guess you could say,
00:54trying it out with someone.
00:56And we like that dynamic better.
00:58About two years ago, we met Ally.
01:01It was the 4th of July, I guess you could say, cookout.
01:03We started to, like, really hang out a lot after that.
01:07And then it kind of just gradually turned into something.
01:09It wasn't something planned.
01:11We kind of just all came together.
01:13Here we are now, over two years later.
01:15I biologically don't have any children.
01:19When I first met Trell, I knew that he already had Lele.
01:22We call her Lele.
01:23But Aaliyah is her name.
01:25We met about a year after she was born.
01:27And then now we have our new baby, Rain.
01:30Oh, yeah.
01:31Emily had, you know, her issues with it at first.
01:35It happened so abruptly.
01:37It was so fast.
01:38It was a shock.
01:39It was like, we're with Ally, and it's like,
01:41here's Rain.
01:42Like, you know.
01:43Yeah, it was quick.
01:44It was quick.
01:45It was, like, very fast.
01:46We had some people, like, contacting her, like,
01:49did they just get with you so you can have a baby for them?
01:52Or are you a surrogate?
01:54Yeah, they thought I was a surrogate.
01:56Yeah, and it was like, yo, like, no.
01:59That's one of the worst things you could say as far as to her,
02:02because, you know what I'm saying?
02:04It's like, she deals with, you know, issues in that area.
02:08So we've all been working on that.
02:11I don't want them to add this part.
02:13It's okay.
02:14It's real, you know, but at the end of the day,
02:16it just was very, it's insulting.
02:19I even have to explain to friends, like, you know,
02:21when they're like, when are you going to have a kid?
02:22It's such a, like, common question,
02:24because we've been together so long.
02:25But it's like a jab, like, every time.
02:29Some people try to test our relationship
02:31and cause little triggers, but we're unbreakable, honestly.
02:36I eventually would like to have a child.
02:39So, eventually we'll get there.
02:42But it's just something that, it has to be planned, you know?
02:45Mmm, yummy!
02:47Baby Rain is being raised by me and Emily,
02:49so she has two mothers, which is pretty lucky of her.
02:52So, she already calls Emily mom and as well me.
02:57We'll definitely let her know that Ally is her biological mother
03:01as far as, you know, she gave birth to her.
03:03But we're raising her together and nobody loves her any less.
03:06Oh my God, I couldn't even believe that she was actually, like, there.
03:14She's just crazy now.
03:16Lily is very open about it.
03:18She's happy about it.
03:19She loves Ally.
03:20Ally loves her.
03:21I think it's because in the beginning,
03:22we didn't, like, sit her down, like,
03:23okay, this is what's going to happen.
03:25It was more so...
03:26She kind of just figured it out.
03:27Yeah, it was more so, like, we were living our life
03:29and it was just, like, this is Ally.
03:32She just saw that it was organic.
03:34How do you feel about all of us?
03:36I don't care.
03:39You told me somebody asked you something about it
03:42and you said, uh...
03:43It was the kid when we went to that one pool party
03:46on 4th of July.
03:47Oh yeah, what happened?
03:48She's like, she's like, oh, is that your mom?
03:52I was like, yeah.
03:54She's like, well, is that your dad?
03:57He was like, yeah.
03:58And he was like, why is your dad hugging her?
04:01I was like, because they're all dating.
04:04She was like, how?
04:05I was like, you asked your mom.
04:07I don't want to talk about this.
04:12Did you lose any friends
04:13when you became part of their relationship?
04:15I did.
04:16I lost a handful of friends when I came into the relationship.
04:21I didn't lose any friends at all.
04:23I guess that's the thing about being a guy
04:26is, like, they always assume something is cool,
04:29but they don't even want to really know why you're the way you are.
04:32They just assume, like, oh, you're a dude.
04:34You got multiple girls. You're cool.
04:35Yeah.
04:36It's like, yeah, it's cool, but it's also a challenge.
04:40Some people just assume that we're just an open relationship.
04:45Yo.
04:46What up, bro?
04:47What up, bro?
04:48All right, man.
04:49What's going on?
04:50I have friends that don't understand.
04:52It's not like they're against it.
04:53They just still don't quite understand the dynamic.
04:56Like, we're all together, not just there with me.
04:59What did you think the first time Terrell told you about being in a poly relationship?
05:03I was impressed.
05:04I was like, man, I don't know how you do it.
05:06One is enough.
05:07People don't understand what our lifestyle is.
05:09They just see two women and one man, they think it's just party, party, lit, turn up.
05:13Right.
05:14And that's part of it, but that's not the whole thing.
05:16Right, right.
05:17That's a small fraction of what it really is, man.
05:18Yeah.
05:19It's an actual relationship.
05:20It's work, man.
05:21A lot of it, too.
05:22If your friends and your spouses enjoy each other as far as, like, friendship, brotherhood,
05:28sisterhood, you can go far with that, man.
05:30You got your squad.
05:31You know what I'm saying?
05:32What's the best thing about the poly relationship?
05:35That we all get to be together.
05:38That's true.
05:40There's so many different personalities, you know, and then on top of that, we're three
05:44different ethnicities, so we get to share our cultures together.
05:47Oh, yeah.
05:48Food is the best.
05:49The food is crazy, right?
05:50Finance, too.
05:51I mean, three incomes.
05:52Oh, that, too.
05:53Three incomes.
05:54That doesn't hurt.
05:55You still have to go through, like, trials and tribulations.
05:58Putting your emotions in things can wear you out, so don't give up.
06:02In these dynamics, they do take longer to really find—it's easier to find one person,
06:08but it's harder to have two, so definitely patience is a big thing, for sure.
06:14We have a family to raise.
06:16We have bigger things to focus on.
06:17It's deeper than just us being together at this point.
06:20All right, y'all.
06:24Yeah.
06:25That's a good one.
06:26Yeah.
06:27Those are nice.
06:28All right, y'all.
06:29It is a wrap.
06:30It is a wrap.
06:30How can we work?
06:35You
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