00:00When people look at me, they don't believe that I gave birth to my son.
00:03I had people sending me like threatening comments.
00:07Men don't birth children.
00:09So that shows that you are a woman, you twit.
00:11A biological woman playing dress up.
00:14When he actually came out, the family had a very hard time.
00:18Did you ever disapprove of or feel upset by Kion's decision to transition?
00:25Alright. Ready to make this breakfast, son?
00:28Of course.
00:31Let me switch.
00:33I'm Kion, 28 years old.
00:35I've been transitioning for about 10 years now.
00:39I did take a year off when I conceived my son.
00:44Oh, that was a big one.
00:47Can I crack it on your head?
00:49Can you crack it on my head?
00:50Yeah.
00:51So being a parent is difficult.
00:53I feel like just knowing that it's not just about you anymore,
00:58and you have someone that looks up to you and someone that you had to be a role model for.
01:03Would you like to talk to me about the stress of being transparent, like what people don't get about it?
01:10Some stresses of being transparent.
01:12I feel like that society is used to a certain dynamic when it comes to like parenting.
01:19I feel like a lot of times, like as a transgender dad, I would kind of get like misgendered and
01:25things like that.
01:26So the fact that like I carry my son, it'd be like, okay, that's his mom.
01:31You know what I mean?
01:31My dynamic in my family is different.
01:34I feel like the misgendering and things like that and just society not being, I guess, accepting of it,
01:39just due to the fact that it's not something that you see every day.
01:45Man, food is really good.
01:47Eat the food, man.
01:49I feel like I always felt different, even since I was a kid.
01:53I felt like I didn't fit in.
01:56I felt like I wasn't the person that everybody wanted me to be at that moment.
02:01I didn't know the real like meaning, I mean the name for it.
02:06But I would say I had a lot of like dysphoria.
02:09It was things that my family or society wanted me to do or they wanted me to act like gender
02:15roles.
02:16You know what I mean?
02:16Like girls are supposed to be sweet and not aggressive and things like that.
02:21So I just felt like, um, yeah, I didn't fit in.
02:25And, you know, I started my journey of transitioning at the age of 18.
02:31My friends and family were more so supportive.
02:34Any decision that I made within myself, regardless if they like understood it or not,
02:39if that was what made me happy, they were like willing to, you know, support me with it.
02:44I was scared, not for myself, but for them because it was definitely going to be a difference.
02:49Seven years into my transition, I found out that I was pregnant with my son.
02:52Yes, I did stop taking hormones because the pregnancy was planned.
02:56But when I conceived my son, me and his father were together, like in a relationship.
03:01Now we co-parent.
03:03Honestly, my friends and family, like they didn't really believe, grasp it at first
03:09because like it was kind of all new to them.
03:13I was probably off of testosterone for probably about a year and like six months
03:18because like even after you have your child, they want you to wait before you go and get back on
03:25hormones.
03:25Once I was cleared, I got back on testosterone and continued my transition.
03:30Do I believe that my transition will affect my child's upbringing?
03:35For me personally, no.
03:38I'm very upfront with my son about everything.
03:40I educate him on things.
03:42Other kids, they're not taught about these things and they don't know.
03:44It might look different to them, so they might, you know, have something to say about it.
03:48But other than that, I just feel like if you are open with your kids, if you are honest and
03:54you educate them on things,
03:55there's no way that they can go into something and be affected by it if they already know everything that
04:02surrounds it.
04:04Grandma.
04:04Hey, grandson.
04:05Hey, mom.
04:06Hey, son.
04:08What's up?
04:08Good.
04:09They say a mother knows and I kind of knew ever since my son was younger that he was different.
04:17But I supported him from the beginning.
04:20I had years to deal with it.
04:22When he actually came out, he was 14, everybody else had to catch up.
04:27The family had a very hard time.
04:29But Jan is to himself.
04:31And it's like if you can't accept him, accept the lifestyle, just stay away from him.
04:36Get an outlook on how you're feeling about, you know, the negative comments and things that's being said.
04:43I want to know how you and my grandson is doing.
04:46Well, pretty much.
04:48A lot of times I just ignore it, you know, having tough skin and stuff like that.
04:53It has always helped me navigate through life.
04:56Tell us about the decision to tell your story online.
05:00I started my transition and my journey.
05:01I wanted to be that voice for people that might not have had the voice for themselves.
05:07And then when I became pregnant, that was another way for me to be that voice.
05:12So more so when I'm like posting like me being pregnant and stuff like that, I get a lot of
05:17good comments.
05:17But then I also get like, you know, the negative comments.
05:19These kids are done.
05:21This is so confusing.
05:22Men don't birth children.
05:24Women do.
05:25Men can't have babies.
05:27Congratulations, young lady.
05:28Who carry her child, don't be confused.
05:30I had people sending me like threatening comments.
05:34Poor kid.
05:35So that shows that you are a woman, you twit.
05:38This one say that's total confusion and not God's plan.
05:41Sick world we live in.
05:43Poor child.
05:44Incorrect.
05:45A woman had a baby.
05:46A woman who had birth.
05:48This one say this world is turning into a zoo.
05:51Is your baby going to get a sex change in a couple of weeks too?
05:55It's a lot of comments.
05:57Okay.
05:57I can keep going on and on.
05:59Well, son, you know, always told you, you have to be happy in your own skin.
06:05And obviously you're happy with the way you have grown up.
06:09I love you.
06:10And you have an excellent support system.
06:13Your family is here.
06:15Okay.
06:16Yes.
06:16Yes.
06:17So don't listen to those negative comments.
06:20I always told you, feel for tough.
06:23Let's go for your grandson.
06:24Go get some air.
06:26All right.
06:27Negative comments, they don't really bother me much, but can become overwhelming when it's like so much of it.
06:34People that don't have strong skin or don't have a support system, it might affect them differently.
06:40I would say the hate that I receive, was I ever afraid that it would like affect my son?
06:46Yes and no.
06:48Because I just feel like, me, that's my son and I'm his parent.
06:52No, my son's not going to feel nothing that I feel in that type of way.
06:55But also, I am his parent.
06:58How am I going to explain to my son that I was biologically his mom.
07:02Now I'm biologically his dad.
07:04Like something like that.
07:05Basically said like, it's not a biology test on who a parent is and all of that stuff.
07:09I don't really teach him about labels.
07:11I'm trying to raise him off of love.
07:13We talk about it a lot.
07:14He tells me things, but you know, it don't seem like, you know, he's bothered by it, but you might
07:19not know.
07:19He might not want to tell me.
07:20So that's why I said therapy would be something that I feel like would be good.
07:24So that he'd be able to just let it all out.
07:30Well son, you know you always got my support.
07:34No matter what, you have a strong support system behind you.
07:38I'm great. I love you guys.
07:40I love you too, mom.
07:41I love you too.
07:42My message to any trans parent out there would be that the way that you identify, it doesn't determine how
07:50you parent.
07:51So just do what you have to do for you and your child regardless of what anyone has to say
07:56or what anyone thinks.
07:57Because they're not you and your child, you know.
08:00If I respond to the haters, if it don't apply, you let it fly.
08:03And if people are happy doing it, just let them do that.
08:06Would you like to have more children in the future?
08:08I'm not sure if I'm going to go through the process again, if that makes perfect sense.
08:13But I always did one, two kids and you never know what the future holds.
08:16So, you know.
08:17I'm not sure if I can.
08:18No.
08:22I don't know if I have a child that's what I want to do, but I'm not sure if the
08:23future holds me.
08:23You know, family needs to be doing it one year.
08:23You know, we can be doing it one year.
08:23You know, family needs to be doing it.
08:25You see.
08:28You're all right, you're right.
08:29You're right.
08:30Are you ready?
08:30I'm ready.
08:32You're right.
08:33I'm ready.
08:34You're ready.
08:35I'm ready.
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