00:00I actually got a boob job, and my mom joked when I got it done.
00:03She was like, who are you?
00:04Like, I don't even wear bras.
00:06Hi, guys.
00:06My name is Nikki Philippi.
00:07I have always been into, like, just hair and makeup and fashion.
00:12I loved magazines.
00:14I would buy piles of them and just keep them for long periods of time.
00:17I did not feel like the girls in the magazines.
00:21I had, like, really clear skin in high school.
00:23I would get stopped, like, on the street, at the store, at restaurants.
00:27I mean, literally very regularly.
00:29And people would come over and be like, oh, my gosh.
00:31You have the most beautiful skin.
00:34Then I got my period when I was 18, and I got severe acne.
00:38Like, bad acne that you would see, like, on the wall of a doctor's office.
00:43And it made me not want to go out of my house for a long time.
00:46And not even just from, like, ew, I look gross.
00:49It was, like, I didn't want to talk to people because it hurt to talk to people.
00:54And that's weird to be, like, such a smiley person who, all of a sudden, you're like,
00:58I can't smile because it hurts.
01:00That's why the scars still, like, affect me.
01:04Scarring just brings me back to how painful it all really was.
01:10I feel beautiful on some days, and then other days, I don't feel beautiful.
01:15It comes and it goes.
01:16That's the thing.
01:17I feel like you want to think you've, like, mastered things, but I haven't.
01:22And I think just looking back, I would tell myself, like, relax.
01:25Just enjoy life.
01:27Enjoy yourself.
01:28And really, most importantly, like, it's okay.
01:31Like, you've got to be okay.
01:32Okay.
01:33Okay.
01:34Okay.
01:34Okay.
01:34Okay.
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