00:04so today is veterans day and I don't know about you guys but when I think of
00:09veterans I feel like dog shit our vets have been getting fucked right so now
00:14it's time for me so fuck a vet oh my god I'm gonna sleep with you you want to
00:24have a little uh champagne on Isis I have an IUD IED not IUD this medication is
00:30making me tremble and see I can make it stop yeah but you're really just like
00:34dropping it all the time you know what I mean yeah yeah yeah twerk twerk for
00:39America it's your lucky day have you fucked a vet today
00:50let's hear it am I right all right this is Jessie the most exciting face in female branded content
00:58right now bar none okay now who's ready to sign her there are no bones for monetization in this project
01:06like I mean none whatsoever nothing okay zero nada okay we heard you Chloe so many
01:14listen guys real real women you see this real women okay are the next big wave of clickbait no
01:21one likes women that real are you kidding me so Stuart did you remember to water the plants
01:29cuz you're the house sitter you don't even live here so you know we're not gonna sit here and take
01:35this
01:36bullshit from you guys who are clearly clearly a bunch of amateurs you know j-dog
01:41let's take a walk fuck you guys thanks for coming don't thank them come on
01:53hey Jess I get your ride you don't have a car I like to you know keep my options open
01:58I'm just gonna
02:01walk wait do you want to um let's grab a burger you want to grab a burger grab a burger
02:05I'm not hungry it's on me it's on me
02:07I'm not I'm just gonna walk home okay hey Jess talent never walks okay but if you aren't I can
02:14I walk with you because I don't really like this area it's a little unsafe I feel like I need
02:18some time alone okay
02:21oh I get it no you think I'm a loser like everybody else sorry I wasted your time I'll leave
02:27you be
02:30Stewart wait wait Stewart of course I don't think you're a loser okay it's totally my fault remind me
02:36never to wear a jumper holy camel toe I'm gonna tell you that you're so fucking talented and like you
02:43deserve everything I don't know I just feel like I let you down and I'm not I'm gonna I'm gonna
02:50Stewart you're my guy I don't care if you have a fancy office or a car or a house or
02:57a bed
02:58so you're not firing me
03:00no
03:00I love you
03:04all right
03:04hey hey listen to me listen to me I'm not gonna let you down okay
03:09I won't and fuck these lean mass brands all right they don't deserve you you deserve better I'm gonna
03:13make it better okay why does this why is this extra what is going on here why does this feel
03:17extra squishy what did you did you take did you really take the sushi what I was hungry
03:24you look you look amazing but let's we got to keep this professional all right I can't have you
03:28want to go fuck it's just okay yeah yeah oh shit Sadie's still here
03:34what Sadie who's Sadie she's a huge vine star Jess
03:39play cool play cool
03:40we're gonna go play around
03:41Stewart they're like four years old
03:43shhh
03:44Sadie Sadie
03:46what up girl what's going on yo
03:49what this girl is Jess this girl breaks the internet on the dizzy
03:57just some fine shit but you are hella funny
04:00Jessie so dope
04:02what about your vet video when you told that guy that he was worth getting HP for I died
04:08so dope died it was so funny so funny by the way just to be clear though
04:11Jessie doesn't really have HP well I do have HP but it's not the background
04:15so fucking weird
04:17you know what I just holy shit I just remembered I have that investor meeting with Ryan down at the
04:24thing we should and I you know what would you mind giving Jessie a lift because I gotta head out
04:28here
04:28yeah I got you whatever let's chill
04:30yeah
04:31this girl runs the fucking internet okay so I need to get in good
04:36we'll collab we'll do some videos and stuff like that so just play cool but get to know her
04:40but also like be aggressive about it okay work it work
04:44alright well I'm gonna I'm gonna head out but you girls have fun
04:48mm-hmm it was a pleasure to see you okay well alright so
04:52see you guys later okay
04:55hey are you 21?
04:58yeah totes
04:59so you said you could buy booze
05:01seas off
05:14sadie setting what?
05:17find the shit
05:20no
05:44Well, you guys have expensive teeth
05:47Can I borrow like five bucks?
05:49We're stealing this shit
05:51Oh, right, right, cool, cool
05:54Okay, I've got a plan
05:56Dude
05:57Just walk the fuck out
05:59Yeah
06:02Watch and learn, bitch
06:03You can't just walk out
06:04Yes, you can, dude, just do it
06:05Move that diaper button, do it
06:16Get your shit together
06:17Jessie, move!
06:18Jessie!
06:20Come on, dude
06:22So all you need is like 20 ounces of soda, 4 ounces of Tessin, and a water balance sucker
06:28And this is what we call weed
06:31Oh, shit!
06:31Am I gonna like OD or whatever?
06:33Don't be a pussy, Jessie, it's like cold medicine
06:36I don't know
06:40Um, I super love smoking weed and like hitting the bong, but I don't actually think I should
06:46Cause last time I smoked weed, I thought my cat was like a Nazi raping me
06:50What?
06:51You dumb whore
06:52Hey!
06:54Dumb whore?
06:56We don't do that, we're sexually liberated females
06:59Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug
07:04It tastes like cherry, it's delicious
07:10She's gonna get wasted
07:12I don't feel anything, this is like really weak
07:16Sadie! Find the shit, I'm moonwalking forward
07:19No, I'm not inspired
07:24I'm sober
07:26I don't even feel anything
07:43I cannot!
07:45I cannot!
07:46I cannot!
07:46I can't breathe!
07:47Mommy!
07:48Mommy!
07:49Help me!
07:50I can't breathe!
07:52I can't breathe!
07:52I can't breathe!
07:54I can't breathe!
07:55She needs help, Sadie.
07:56Dude, someone help you!
07:58Just go!
08:00I'm drowning!
08:01Mommy!
08:03Drowning!
08:03Help me!
08:05The water's so deep!
08:07You're not even in the water, dude!
08:09Mommy!
08:10Chloe!
08:12Who is Cole?
08:13I'm gonna just get this straight.
08:16If this guy cheated on you,
08:19OD'd in your bathroom,
08:20and is currently living with your moms...
08:22Yeah, but it's a really complicated situation, okay?
08:25You're so young, you don't understand.
08:26Love is painful.
08:27No, anal is painful.
08:29Love is easy.
08:30You just gotta keep that shit on lock.
08:32I got my shit on lock.
08:34If my mom was fucking my boyfriend,
08:38I would beat that biatch down!
08:39Fuck you.
08:40Wait, they're not fucking, are they?
08:43Probably.
08:46But they're my family.
08:47Oh, fuck that.
08:49This right here,
08:51this is your family.
08:52We're your family.
08:53What you've got is a scrub,
08:55and you know what we do with scrubs?
08:57Check them!
09:01Check them!
09:25You wrote the plot out from the start,
09:28and made yourself a beating heart.
09:31I was the one who stole your crown.
09:34You was the one with the biggest mouth now.
09:37If anti-your means anti-ho,
09:39or gas,
09:40we just fit the best cause.
09:43Ain't no first,
09:44it's still a legend.
09:45Heart's a word,
09:47and I imagine!
09:52You're absolutely different.
09:57You were right
10:00You're a good one!
10:01Oh, shit!
10:02Oh, shit!
10:04Oh, shit.
10:05Oh, shit.
10:06Oh, shit.
10:07Oh!
10:11What?
10:12Shit! Shit the lawn!
10:14Shit the lawn!
10:16Shit the lawn!
10:17Hello?
10:19What's out there?
10:23What's all that laughing?
10:24What's out there?
10:25Go! Go! Go!
10:34And then she shit on the lawn!
10:37Shit the lawn!
10:40No, I didn't!
10:41I shit the lawn!
10:46How old are you anyway, dookie booty?
10:49I'm like...
10:5125?
10:53What?
10:53Yo, to Jessie!
10:55The cougar with the Jew titties!
10:57Look at them babies!
10:58Look at them, scrumptious!
11:00Let's toast to that motherfucking strip!
11:02Jessie! Jessie! Jessie!
11:05Jessie! Jessie! Jessie!
11:06Jessie! Jessie!
11:07Jessie! Jessie!
11:09Jessie!
11:12You take it baby!
11:13Oh shit!
11:14You take it baby!
11:15Take it!
11:16Take it!
11:17Take it!
11:18Take it!
11:19Take it!
11:20Take it!
11:21Take it!
11:22Take it!
11:27Get your shit together!
11:30See you!
11:31Are you okay?
11:32I'm okay.
11:34You look good!
11:36Weak!
11:38Weak!
11:39Weak!
11:41Weak!
11:42Weak!
11:42Fuck this!
11:44Alright!
11:45Alright!
11:45Let's go!
11:46She's fine!
11:48Oh baby!
11:48She's good!
11:50She's good!
11:50Come on, she's done!
11:54Yeah!
11:56Yeah, girl!
12:00You're doing amazing right now. You're gonna feel so much better.
12:03Oh, I got you.
12:06Did Tyler see?
12:08Listen to me, okay?
12:10You do not have to keep hurting yourself.
12:14Okay?
12:20Ooh, yeah, that's the one. Look, now you're so skinny, we can have dinner again.
12:24Okay.
12:26Nachos?
12:28Hi, I'm single.
12:30And you've been watching The Skinny.
12:32If you like what you see, click here to subscribe.
12:35And to watch the next episode, click right here.
12:38Get your binge on. You know what I mean.
12:41Love you, bye.
12:42My guest, but she's not my guest. She's my daughter!
12:45That's really cool.
12:47All right, ladies, let's turn in all of our cell phones.
12:50You'll get them back at the end of the weekend.
12:54What?
12:55Oh, yeah, we're an internet-free zone.
12:57So you're here to just completely unplug and connect with your inner bandwidth.
13:02Oh, I'm not interested, but thank you so much.
13:04Oh, shit, I have one bar.
13:06Call Stuart. Stuart!
13:08No, that's good. Thank you.
13:10I just have an emergency. I think I'm getting a...
13:12Honey.
13:13Amber alert.
13:14Come here!
13:14Here, wait, I learned a new yoga move.
13:17Right.
13:18Now breathe and just let go.
13:21Honey, you are addicted, okay?
13:24You need to unwind. Namaste.
13:27Yeah, you're right.
13:28Why would I want a reminder that I'm a complete and total failure?
13:33Do you want a Luna bar?
13:35Here, let me get you one.
13:37Oh, shoot! I just remembered Cole took the last one.
13:41Stop saying his name! Stop!
13:44Cole?
13:44Stop saying his name, Mom!
13:47I'm sorry.
13:51You know what? I don't forgive you.
13:54Jessie.
13:55I'm never gonna forgive you.
13:56It's not okay.
13:58I'm gonna go get some fucking kale.
14:01Oh, honey.
14:03Ugh!
14:08Jesus Christ.
14:11Dude, can I get some bread?
14:13Or, like, quesadilla or something?
14:15Then, make a stitch on the top of its imagination.
14:15Then, I'm not just Кедди and magic and magic yeshaya.
14:15Then, make a stitch in place and not make it fast.
14:15And do this.
14:15What's a question?
14:15Oh yeahhaya.
14:15That's amazing.
14:16In fact, that's very nice to see....
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